Cinematic Excrement: Episode 153 - Santa With Muscles

[@BowserTheSecond]

The most insane thing of all about this film is that of all people it was produced by Jordan Belfort, the real life Wolf of Wall Street.

[@newmedia2862]

that's a far more interesting story than the one in this film

[@coolnerdlll6053]

I shouldn't be surprised. They made an entire movie about his terrible money choices.

[@mysterykiddo2167]

@@coolnerdlll6053 Really, what's it called?

[@VictoriousCatholic]

Even more nuts? Suburban Commando was part of the inspiration for Star vs The Forces of Evil.

[@animesjogoseseriesclassica8282]

I wonder how many wrestlers tried to become movie actors over the years and succeded. You think that they would be better at that since they are already playing characters on the ring.

[@EliseArainai]

Holy shit, the sheriff is the Ice Cream Man! Sorry you got dragged into this, Mr. Howard

[@coolnerdlll6053]

This was right after he was in Apollo 13, too (even if he was only in that movie because Ron directed it). Talk about whiplash.

[@erichfiedler1481]

Let's hope that's grenadine for his ice cream treats and not blood

[@TheHeroOfTomorrow]

“Merry Christmas to the Smeghead! Fa la la la la, la la la la!”

[@subtlebluntduality5997]

Every time Hulk Hogan gets too full of himself, remember that this is the same guy who co-wrote the 'Dookie' scene in No Holds Barred.

[@otaking3582]

The most baffling part of the film is Mila Kunis learning how to make a modified Santa suit from a MegaMan comic. Yes, seriously.

[@AxioProductions]

Also her first acting role too

[@hesnotquitedead]

11:14 Never thought my Gen Z ass would think London Tipton and Kevin McCallister would be dating at one point.

[@TyroneBruinsmaFilms]

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to Sean and the viewers of this channel. I wish you all the best for 2025! And I hope Sean you'll one day cover bad films forever

[@NinaEinstein2006]

Merry Christmas!! And happy 15th anniversary to Cinematic Excrement Sean!!!!

[@texasbiggalcatlover8200]

Wow, Merry Christmas to you all! 🎅

[@roberthullah8619]

Not only was Hogan filming Three Ninja's at the time but he filmed a heel promo from the set IN COSTUME. Yes that dumbass "Super Hero" costume.

[@BainesMkII]

I want to vaguely recall that heel Hogan explained making the movie as just doing it for the money?

[@JeffreyDeCristofaro]

Man, I thought CJ's Cynical Reviews' own take on this years ago would be the only time I visit Hulk's Holiday Trash but I was proven wrong! Merry Christmas, Sean!!!

[@ErikFickhesen]

I think the Drunk Santa thing came from the Twilight Zone Christmas special, which started with a person who played Santa as a job having a drinking problem that cost him that.

[@suedenim]

I think the ur-example is Miracle on 34th Street, where Kris fills in for the parade santa at the last minute because he was too drunk.

[@daedubois9428]

I remember the Santa at the mall in the '70's being under the influence. The trope came from real life gen x experiences.

[@otaking3582]

Bouncy Clown has a video about how stuff like clowns and ventriloquist dummies used to be considered charming before pop culture subverted them. I'm guessing that it's the same with mall Santa's.

[@geraldmartin7703]

I still have a photo, taken in the early 1950s, of my brother on the knee of a street corner Santa in Austin, Texas. My mother said Santa stank of alcohol. Apparently it was a form of soliciting/begging because I remember encountering Santa on multiple streets. Fueled my early scepticism of the character.

[@themarkiscookin]

According to Brutus they had a falling out because hulk came on to his wife

[@user-account-not-found]

Thus is still one of the best channels yeh smeghead.

[@tinkerhell-kj3mv]

It's been a minute since I've heard someone referred to as a "hey it's that guy". My Christmas present is no longer feeling like I'm a hundred years older than everyone else on this website. Happy holidays!

[@BreadHart]

Merry Christmas, Smeghead! Your channel has been a blessing. I love the "angry reviewer" style of videos, and you pull off that perfectly.

[@mysterykiddo2167]

He defiantly does

[@yashasvirallabandi9070]

That, combined with the fact that his format has more or less remained the same, makes this channel reliable for some casual entertainment, even if he only uploads a new episode every 1 or 2 months

[@MedicineMundy]

Merry Jingly, Sean! **big hugs**

[@erichfiedler1481]

Hulk Hogan is definitely alot more controversial now and also very conservative, I mean he's the reason why the WWE hasn't unionized, and he attended this year's RNC in Milwaukee, which was a freak show

[@la_sn3ak3r19]

Cope and seethe

[@la_sn3ak3r19]

Cope

[@erichfiedler1481]

@la_sn3ak3r19 not a fan of unions are you?

[@la_sn3ak3r19]

@@erichfiedler1481 cope harder

[@dudeist_priest]

​@@erichfiedler1481 this weirdo's only comment history is gloating about the election results. Pity his empty life and pay him no mind

[@teddyfurstman1997]

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, Sean.

[@brandonmurphy301]

7:15 That is not a Bazooka, it is an M72 LAW rocket. The M1 Bazooka has not been used since WW2, and the the last one used(The M20 Super Bazooka) hasn't been in use since the Vietnam War. That is your pedantic correction for today!

[@hesnotquitedead]

I’ve played my fair share of Black Ops 1 back in the day and even I could clock in that that was an M72 LAW from a mile away 😂

[@brandonmurphy301]

I just happened to notice it was the same launcher that D-FENS had in Falling down, and that, I could easily look up.

[@policerthought5649]

Easy there jackal

[@brandonmurphy301]

@@policerthought5649 Game recognize game,

[@christineharris2302]

I remember when my daughter was small, they would hire these unfortunate men, let's say, to play Santa because obviously they were cheap. And yes, they tended to reek of alcohol. 🙁

[@nathaniellevesque2782]

Checking youtube cause i cant sleep, You released the video at the perfect time

[@macdallanzero2145]

You get a thumbs up every time I watch one of your videos but I wish I could give you a second one for that warning. Cheers, bud, thanks for the gift. 👍

[@HenshinHeroesMedia]

Better movie examples of a santa with muscles: rise of the guardians, klaus, and violent night

[@coolnerdlll6053]

Also Narnia.

[@matthiasschulz3569]

How about Red One, if you've seen that one?

[@JenMistress]

Oh, so you DIDN'T make up any of those names. Here I thought I'll have to rewatch that OSW Reviews video again where they listed off Ed's gimmicks, because I remember hearing each of them before. 😉😂🤣 And yeah, even though The Rock is doing that Final Boss gimmick now, think I could still see him doing kids movies, even though his recent Christmas movie didn't do so well in the box office, Red One. Granted, being fair, I believe it still made more than Santa With Muscles, but still, didn't do so well. Anyways, enjoyed the video, thank you, Sean, and Merry Christmas.

[@IronGhost8280]

Fun Fact: In addition to Kunis (Meg from Family Guy) and Song (Anne from Amphibia), the female reporter at (15:09) is Jennifer Paz, the voice of Lapis Lazuli from Steven Universe.

[@TommyDeonauthsArchives]

Santa with Muscles... is one of my guilty pleasures. I would watch the film whenever Family Channel Canada would air it. I was an easy-to-please child back then... I just loved the concept of Santa kicking but...

[@itsmonday7450]

Hi Everyone! I hope you have a wonderful holiday season, whatever you celebrate! Here's to another year of excrement!😂

[@BrandonCroker]

Hulking up a fascinating review, I see.

[@roberttreacy8271]

Merry Christmas, Sean, and happy 15th anniversary to CE! Can’t wait to see what you’ll cover in the new year.

[@sabrinaloizides-merideth9874]

What a wonderful Christmas present!

[@Genevieve1023]

It's so nice to see you again. Merry Christmas🎄

[@VerdantRange]

Sadly, I've seen plenty of things where the subtitlers just gave up. One of the first examples I can think of was from an episode of The Replacements on Disney+ where there's a song sequence and it just says "inaudible".

[@thefantasticretroreviewer3941]

There's no lie that most Movies can be very odd, even during the Holiday Season

[@suedenim]

It took me a little digging, but the movie was only released in 98 theaters so the box office isn't QUITE as bad as it sounds. Basically "direct to video plus"

[@alexanderklepp]

Merry Christmas, Sean!

[@uniqcorn1]

Thank you for this video, it's the best gift I got today! Merry Chrismukkwanza!

[@NotoriousLightning]

I never drive without having a glass or two to steady the nerves first. A glass or two of Coca-Cola, that is! That stuff really calms me down.

[@jonathanbarr9764]

This is the second channel in the past twenty four hours to call me a filthy animal while wishing me a Merry Christmas and I say the same to you sir. Also I'm still hoping you'll review that bad Nutcracker movie at some point.

[@thedorkone1516]

Happy Hogswatch!

[@TheRichyrich818]

I’m dying at the acknowledgement of Hulk’s leaked racist phone call. 😂. You’re a real one Sean. Merry Christmas!!

[@tristanmichels5721]

A Cinematic Excrement episode on Christmas Day? What a day!!

Christmas movie have always been released in November, not just December. In his 40+ years of living, how does Sean not know this?

[@jamesatkinsonja]

I'm sure he's just making a joke

@@jamesatkinsonja It's not like anybody would know that

[@AmishParadise27]

Hulk Hogan being a "dumpster fire of a human being" is actually code for him finding God apparently.

[@suzialvesdecarvalhogarcia5016]

Merry Christmas from Brazil!!! And a Happy New Year!!!

[@jonathanbarr9764]

I think the stereotype about mall Santa's being drunks is probably based off the Twilight Zone episode Night Of The Meek which is the oldest example of a drunk mall Santa I can think of where the main character is a depressed drunk. I know it's a department store but I still count it and now I think we should all go watch that episode because it's so much better then this movie.

[@jamesatkinsonja]

His spy hard cameo was pretty funny.

[@robbyscottperry4482]

The officer clearly says, "sheriff. " I'm in the wrong business. I should have been a caption writer for shitty movies.

[@BrandonCroker]

15:18 incidentally, Rudolph Ribeye would be an awesome band name

[@tomlinson1710]

Merry Christmas, Sean Also, nope. I didn’t need sleep

[@wstine79]

Whatcha gonna do when the Smeghead Sean runs wild on you during Christmas?!

[@HandsomeSteveJacobson]

The garbage truck sums up Hogans acting career

[@michaelsinger4638]

Apparently Hogan and a lot of Ed Leslie’s other old wrestling friend HATE his current wife. That is why they had a falling out.

[@jamesbounds]

If Hogan played a part in the 60's Batman series, he could have been Solomon Grundy.

[@devinmccreery8003]

it's around 4am where I am, & I still need 2 see this video.

[@stevenclubb7718]

A possible explanation of the "bazooka okay, guns not okay" comes from the Batman Animated Series, perhaps the only version of the character not to show the origin (at least in the original run, the show rebranded itself several times to maximize syndication profits). Because it had to meet the guidelines set for network animated fare, they couldn't do anything deemed "repeatable" by young kids, so anything with handguns was out as kids were fairly likely to be exposed to guns IRL... so the goons always carried machine guns since they were unlikely to be seen by kids. Throw in TMNT 3 using non-weapons, you get a creative environment where joke weapons and heavy weaponry are go to substitutions for more appropriate weapons in children's media.

[@theconnorcavern]

Jim Cornette would probably disagree with that disclaimer.

[@BrandonCroker]

Oh, brrrother, Tannenbaum?

[@mb2000]

5:51 Does the subtitle guy not get to see a script? Do they literally have to watch the movie and write down everything the actors say?

[@suedenim]

Pretty much, yeah. And they have to capture stuff like sound effects, "sound of a phone ringing," etc, which might not be in the script. Captioners do always ask for scripts, lists of names and acronyms, and such, but don't always receive them. (I'm talking about captioning in general, not just for a movie on DVD)

[@mb2000]

@ Interesting, thought it’d be somewhat more technical nowadays than just writing it down as you hear it! Thanks for the info.

[@misterhighflyer2973]

13:06 Oh come on, Noel World Order was RIGHT THERE, MAAAN!

[@gracekim1998]

Merry Christmas 🥳

[@megatronjenkins2473]

Dude, Jason Brant JUST watched this on his channel last week!!!

[@thefantasticretroreviewer3941]

Sometimes its common for most Wrestlers to be actors in Movies and TV Shows. Both John Cena and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson are already prime examples.

[@geraldmartin7703]

WWE has a movie division, with 60+ movies so far. I admire No One Lives (2012). Serial killer protagonist v. psycho murderers family. Not a comedy.

[@thefantasticretroreviewer3941]

@geraldmartin7703 Ok

[@eddieolshefski6467]

Merry Christmas everyone!🎄🎅☃️

[@tristanhartup4936]

Merry Christmas

[@tsarstepan]

Noooo. Did Hulk Hogan think he was paying homage to Inspector Clouseau and the Pink Panther movies which had the running gag of Inspector Clouseau had his manservant (groan) Cato - surprise attack him whenever possible to keep him sharp and constantly ready for anything?

[@GuardianGrarl]

Fun fact: Before we know it, we'll see Arnold Governator Schwarzenegger as Santa Claus... SO looking forward to it !!

[@coolnerdlll6053]

I'd watch the hell out of Santa Arnold, even if it's just him reciting Jingle All The Way quotes for two hours.

[@megatronjenkins2473]

17:30 Yes, those grown men CAN do better, but they're drunk. Also, don't call him Shirley.

[@michaelsinger4638]

Reindeer stew IS very tasty admittedly.

[@GoldAxe64]

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everybody.

[@JustinCoasters]

23:18 Thbe? Bummer no tease

[@vanaharris4437]

Hogan for the woin!

[@Stephen-to7jx]

Reminds me of Meet the Robinsons.

[@fje6902]

Hulk Hogan was a bad guy when he began with WWF all those years ago.

[@JustinCoasters]

Sean, Do you have No Holds Barred on 4K?

[@that1pyro549]

You say check back with you in 10 years about your hair. I've been watching you for 10 years, I can do 20.

[@daelen.cclark]

Are there still images because of copyright issues? Makes sense with Hogan, but still.

[@JustinCoasters]

A White Guy playing an Asian... No wonder Hulk supports Trump

[@James-n9g2y]

Mila Kunis has been in a worse movie than Jupiter Ascending.

[@piotrdawidziuk2604]

Merry Christmas!

[@JustinCoasters]

12:00 Spooney?

[@christianbuffum-robbins8904]

Please talk about wrestling more often, it's very entertaining.

[@kylekrueger5368]

Brutus Beefcake is also a nice guy in real life and has a respect level unlike Hulk Hogan. Yeah hard to believe Brutus and Hulk are bffs. There the really the complete opposite of each others when it comes to being people.

[@changaduranga3259]

i thought it was satan with mussels

[@migmit]

Hogan was a weapon for Peter Thiel to kill the best workplace I ever had. I hate both (Thiel more). Merry Newtonmas!

[@animesjogoseseriesclassica8282]

I wonder how many wrestlers tried to become movie actors over the years and succeded. You think that they would be better at that since they are already used to playing characters on the ring.

[@suedenim]

El Santo, Blue Demon, and Mil Mascaras!

[@jamesatkinsonja]

Dave Bautista, Dwyane Johnson and John Cena being the main ones.

[@coolnerdlll6053]

@@jamesatkinsonja Do we count Andre the Giant since he was in one great movie and pretty much nothing else?

[@chrismorris6865]

Damn, 23 seconds since the upload, never been this early.

[@markula_4040]

(nasally voice) Well actually.... while you didn't make it up (it's on his Wikipedia page), I don't think The Clipmaster is a name ever used by Ed Leslie. If it is, tell me when he used it. I think maybe it was an intended name when he first joined WCW with Hogan but they ended up calling him Brother Bruti and never tried to use a gimmick similar to Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake.

[@OleanderRainbow]

Merry Christmas dude! (Santa is Canadian IMO. I refuse to accept Santa being a "Real American".)

[@slayerofsheeple]

This movie doesn't work for me brother.

[@PapaTaurean]

Another failed gimmick for Ed Leslie. Brutus the Offensive Stereotype Beefcake

[@JohnSmith-jh6ey]

The still images are getting annoying USE CLIPS

[@ss5447-p2q]

First!

[@Kilroyiii4644]

Made racist comments, did he? Just like a Trump supporter, am I right?

[@coolnerdlll6053]

It's not that I'm disagreeing with you (in fact, I think you're dead-on), but I don't know if you want to poke the beehive.

[@Kilroyiii4644]

@coolnerdlll6053 Ha! Watch me.

[@heinrichfletcher6954]

3AM again! lol

[@dvass7253]

Merry Christmas, Sean!

[@GNAWalker1992]

Merry Christmas

[@RazorRex]

Merry Christmas!

[@171QA]

Merry Christmas!