Criminals and Smartphones Don't Mix

[@LegalEagle]

⚖ This was fun. Any other dumb criminals I should cover? 🍋 Get 65% off with Hello Fresh using code LEGALEAGLE65 legaleagle.link/hellofresh

[@rustystratten499]

There is no short of "dumb" criminals, im sure you'll have content for years to come

[@romefalls.]

i will do the exact opposite of this video's moral and record everything i do

[@johnymey4034]

You owe Simon Whistler a reference credit. He's the godfather of "Don't Record Your Crimes"

[@johnymey4034]

@@Gg-ij7li jesus is fake

[@rustystratten499]

@@johnymey4034 Ello fellow brain blaze enthusiasts

[@eldibs]

"Don't record your crimes" is basically an extension of the most important legal advice that all lawyers wish their clients would follow, and that advice is "Shut up."

[@joshyoung1440]

Yes, we know, that's... exactly how language works?

[@MyChannel773]

@@joshyoung1440 ? if you really have to be snappy in a reply, at least be sure it makes sense first

[@RageUnchained]

@@joshyoung1440 are you sure that you understand how language works? Your use of commas is incorrect; which makes me question whether you do understand.

[@dracothewarrior4316]

@@RageUnchained Actually, his use of commas is correct. If you take out "we know", his sentence would still make sense; it's just an extra detail

[@Neenerella333]

Even before smart phones, criminals couldn't help but brag to friends or fellow inmates for clout. For example: I don't see the police car gas siphoner getting any smarter. He's proud of it.

[@Vesperitis]

I demand more Illegal Eagle giving us legal advice. He seems like such a cool guy.

[@efremvercaigne7265]

He seems totally trustworthy!

[@unitrader403]

Illegal Eagle doesnt give legel advice, he only gives illegal advice... :P

[@lemonielala3080]

Especially with that hairdo

[@MegRabbit]

That whole look demands a dual role bit. I wanna see illegal eagle and legal eagle spar.

[@Canoby]

For when you want not just a criminal defense lawyer, but a Criminal defense lawyer lol

[@BelgorathTheSorcerer]

I think recording your crimes is a fantastic idea. It helps get rid of any nagging reasonable doubt issues that might pop up at the trial.

[@gabrote42]

Honestly not needed. People get convicted on a single person's word alone for DUI.

[@msk-qp6fn]

🤣🤣🤣

[@0011peace]

@@gabrote42 all they need is your blood or a breathlizer for DU

[@gabrote42]

@@0011peace how optimistic of you

[@seabassdarapper]

​@@gabrote42that sounds super easy to disprove if you're not actually drinking and driving

[@Norrikan]

Couple of years back there was a situation with an armed gunman trying to rob a local gas station. During the hold-up his cellphone rang and the dude not just actually went and answered it, but apparently also turned around for some privacy, whereupon one of the customers smashed him in the back of the head with a bottle of vodka (or possibly whiskey, the stories differ in that regard), dropping the robber to the ground and stunning him long enough for the other people present to dogpile him.

[@msk-qp6fn]

This is beautiful

[@crazynutreviews2647]

Please tell me there's video footage somewhere!

[@Heretowatchvideos123]

🤣 stupidity at its finest

[@hesky10]

Would be ironic if it was their parole officer to check they were keeping on the straight and narrow!

[@delphic464]

"Ghosts disappered, aliens stopped visiting, and police started shooting unarmed people." Damn, truth.

[@Blasted2Oblivion]

Unarmed doesn't mean harmless.

[@DopaminedotSeek3rcolonthree]

@@Blasted2Oblivion Yeah, people really underestimate the dangers of Autistic kids stimming and packets of skittles. FR though, you have a point in all fairness, the hand is a powerful tool when used correctly, but the genuine threats with open hands are few and far in between.

[@trentdaballergaming7637]

@@Blasted2Oblivion agreed but police has killed people that were harmless ie mistaking toys phones etc for guns for every race not only black people but that should go without saying

[@limacharlie1]

@@Blasted2Oblivion so every time a cop finds someone whos willing to throw hands, they should be allowed to execute them?

[@Grinnar]

@@Blasted2Oblivion have you considered not defending the killing of restrained and subdued suspects?

[@triplecastsleep1924]

I will always be impressed at how you (seemingly) effortlessly juggle elegant professionalism and rank shitposing.

[@jennyjohnson5428]

Glorious, isn't it?

[@dustbunny6381]

True talent tbh

[@kenq7948]

This should be the top comment.

[@NinjaMaxMC]

Read this during the crack bit

[@gengarzilla1685]

The tip is to not take yourself _too_ seriously.

[@volundrfrey896]

Talking about the first one, here in Sweden there was a guy who hit someone with a rental e-scooter. After he hit him he tried to end the trip and run away, however to end the trip you're required to take a picture of the scooter to prove it's parked correctly. This genius included the victim lying on the ground in the photo, the picture was of course shared with police and his identity could be determined from the app.

[@rqdh22501]

Sheesh

[@hks2377]

Wow🤦‍♀️

[@TheFinalChapters]

How on earth does someone end up lying on the ground from a scooter?

[@suntiger745]

@@TheFinalChapters You hit them with the scooter. They weigh about 8-10 kilos, so the person wielding it can land a solid blow.

[@suzbone]

@@TheFinalChapters pedestrian/bicycle collisions regularly result in serious or even fatal pedestrian injuries.

[@goosegoose5737]

The lady saying “it was just a joke we don’t steal” right after stealing is just so funny to me

[@glenn6583]

A girlfriend of mine once said to me " I don't lie". I am pretty honest. But I sometimes lie, I am human and also sometimes polite. It was the beginning of the end of a sexy relationship. Ah well, so it goes sometimes!😂

[@graham.crackers]

I feel like this is appropriate- 'It's just a prank bro' The prank:

[@Twisted_Code]

yeah, "we totally wouldn't do exactly what we just recorded ourselves doing" like really, is this a game of among us? Imagine "I would never kill blue and then immediately report it... *secretly finger slipped*"

[@heatherduke7703]

I think she means that he was just pretending to siphon the gas. That makes a lot more sense on why he posted a photo of it. Still dumb…

[@kamilytee]

​@@glenn6583 "I don't lie" and "I never ever lie" are different sentences also many people don't even consider 'white lies' actual lies, so what was your point?

[@metropod]

I work for New York City Transit… and we keep dealing with people who record themselves climbing on moving trains, breaking into places they shouldn’t be, and all around trashing our trains.

[@sendthis9480]

The moving trains thing sounds like an issue that will eventually solve itself. Like the tide pod thing.

[@Taragoola]

Lookit Mr Killjoy over here. Don’t climb on the giant metal crush machines.

[@magnusbane420]

Well, that's gonna make an interesting memorial video at the funeral

[@metropod]

@Handy Andy 40% of the system is above ground. Some lines, such as the J and 7, are actually majority on elevated structures.

[@jasona2007]

@Handy Andy easy, climb between the trains cars and use your legs to push yourself up

[@lukaskaufmann8586]

This has perfect timing: Today (22nd September 2022) Czech police distributed photo of an escaped convict who escaped asking for help in looking for him. Under the post of the news channel about it on Facebook, his father commented "You have your sense, keep up, I will always be there for you. Dad" to which another of his relatives responded "Dont worry dad, he is staying with us"

[@grmpEqweer]

🤦

[@justabookworm1382]

I really want to see the original source 🤣

[@wendy645]

That is freaking MAGICAL 🤣🤣🤣

[@skipads5141]

100% *DO* keep recording your crimes. Post them everywhere. Send them to as many people you can't trust.

[@JackieBright]

For extra clout send it directly to the police (without stripping location metadata) to flex on them for not being able to catch you

[@MysticEagle52]

@@JackieBright they won't know what Metadata is lol

[@arsenic-catnip]

@@JackieBright Name check's out

[@vryusvin3905]

Don't worry. Anyone who is about to record their crimes and post them on social media would just take this video as encouragement :) "Don't tell me NOT to record my crimes, now I'm gonna record them twice!" Thank the stars most criminals are morons.

[@stevesether]

Completely agree. Pro Tip: Cops have to tell you if they're cops. So if you're doing something illegal and you think your new friend is a cop, just ask him. If he says no, he's not a cop and you won't get busted.

[@Mr_T_Badger]

I recall they caught the BTK Killer in 2005 when he stupidly asked the police if they could track him through a floppy disk. They said no, because of course they did, and he got tracked down due to the metadata imbedded in his MS Word file. 🤣

[@seniorchonkza997]

Lmfao word

[@manueltapia1859]

But to bad to his daughter se always be remember as a killers' daughter!!!

[@nikkiofthevalley]

@@manueltapia1859????? What?

[@manueltapia1859]

@@nikkiofthevalley imagine to know that your own blood is not what you thought un this case your father. She is having a normal life and try to overcome this.

[@BoxOfToasters]

Dang it, and I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those pesky bits!

[@daelkolwitz3509]

My buddy is a Deputy District Attorney, and he told me, "It's not the smart criminals we capture."

[@virg0_lem0nade]

yep, the only criminals getting caught are the ones who can be outsmarted by a police officer.... that's why only the really, really, REALLY dim criminals get caught. lol.

[@topogigio7031]

Yep, Police are too lazy to go after the actual criminals.

[@samlevi4744]

Low hanging fruit is the way of law enforcement and limited resources

[@likebot.]

@@samlevi4744 Naw... it ain't low hanging fruit. It's just that the smart criminals employ the police from their government offices. Notice Trump is still free.

[@darthparallax5207]

Regrettable, but I don't hold it against the justice system. I've known all my life the only one who catch smart criminals is Batman.

[@dustlass]

Remember when Legal Eagle was watching It's Always Sunny and said it was unrealistic that people would bring drugs into court with them? He had so much faith in humanity back then...

[@MV96_]

To be fair, I bet the writers of the show had so much faith in humanity too(if the drugs in court was intended to be a bit of absurdist comedy).

[@MartinIsRunning]

“Police started shooting unarmed people.” Full stop, I love your content for exactly this reason. Desert-dry satire is best satire.

[@ColoringKaria]

Like Popeyes chicken: desert dry! 👌🥰😍

[@MartinIsRunning]

@@joelle4226 You know what? I may have used the wrong word. But it was definitely a “point” he’s making (that of course unarmed police violence has been going on since before cell phones existed).

[@jonwallace6204]

Deadpan is the best comedy.

[@The_Modeling_Underdog]

@@jonwallace6204 Always was. Always will.

[@billliktor]

Cops are...

[@goawayimreading1685]

"While the phones may be smart, the criminals are still really dumb." Best line ever, lol!

[@ignitionfrn2223]

0:55 - Chapter 1 - Smart phone, dumb thief 3:00 - Chapter 2 - Status ,arrested 5:00 - Chapter 3 - Think different, think detained 6:10 - Chapter 4 - Too sexy for my mugshot 9:10 - Chapter 5 - FB imessage 12:50 - Chapter 6 - Burnt alaska 15:35 - End roll ads

[@allyzapena1001]

Bump

[@PacificEmperor]

0:10 - Chapter 0 - Illegal Eagle

[@maytheforcebewithyou2701]

Hi Mr Timestamp, always be present in all videos.

[@josephjennings3146]

Perfect 👌

[@SylviaRustyFae]

@@maytheforcebewithyou2701 Psst, cud be Ms or Mx Timestamp for all you know; ya wudnt wanna offend the Timestampin Deity, i recommend just avoidin gendered titles for the Magnificent Timestamper.

[@OGSontar]

"...ghosts disappeared, aliens stopped visiting, and police started shooting unarmed individuals..." Man, you nailed that one on the head but good.

[@TexasbyStorm]

Except there's never been more evidence because of cellphones. Clearly the man is out of touch.

[@OGSontar]

@@TexasbyStorm You're comment is unclear. There is no more credible evidence of aliens or ghosts with the advent of smartphones, tending to indicate there is no real evidence at all, and what there is is still blurry crap. There is a lot more evidence of police shootings. Please clarify your comment.

[@k1ngcarrot]

@@TexasbyStorm I can’t tell if you’re missing the joke or being sarcastic

[@tobiastames5224]

@@TexasbyStorm yes, that's the literal joke.

[@robert23456789]

Am sure Aliens only visit us just to see the shit show our race is

[@carmattvidz4426]

I work in public transportation. I always hate it when people breaks laws in front of me. I am a reasonable big guy wearing a uniform so they can certainly see me. It annoys me because when they do something right in front of me I am forced to actually do my job.

[@julietfischer5056]

When I worked security, a surprising number of people would say, "Go ahead and call the police" when I warned them. The police would arrive, and--surprise, surprise--be on my side.

[@nvelsen1975]

@@julietfischer5056 My favourite were the people who had read some vague blog and went "oh no but you're not police, you can't eject me from the premises" aaaaand fling they went outside. 😆 Or the "But you're basically just a citizen, you can't do anything to me brandishing this knife I have" aaaaand crack went the chair over their head. (Ikea Jitsu, the dangerous Swedish martial art. Highly recommended. Much better than bare hands)

[@MB-xw1tu]

The same, when I was an RA in a freshman dorm. I basically told all residents, please don't be idiots. I don't want to get you fined or kicked out of housing. And then I'd tell them basically the circumstances under which I would have absolutely no choice but to call my bosses and write a report about it. (If you are obviously having a party, I will knock on your door and tell you "I think you are having a party, I'm coming back in 5 minutes and I really don't want to find any alcohol here." UNLESS when you open the door I see people with beer bottles or liquor in open sight... then I can't give you a warning/free pass, so don't open the door until all the evidence is hidden. PLEASE! Or.... if you are smoking pot in your room please make sure it isn't completely obvious to anyone walking into the wing (overwhelmingly strong smell, obvious cloudiness in the hallway). Both of these are legal issues, but as far as residence life department were concerned they were safety issues, so we were mostly interested in ending secretive drinking and preventing people from having open flames. So when people are caught in a way that meant we HAD to do the required things, it felt like... GUYS work with me here! You live right next to a grassy field the size of multiple football fields where no police are going to find you... go out there and smoke your weed like a responsible teenager!

[@MB-xw1tu]

@@julietfischer5056 In that same res. life career during our orientation we were taken to the campus police department (it was really large university that had as many students enrolled as lived in the city where it was located). And they brought us down to the holding cells and the benches... equipped with a steel bar so they could handcuff people to them. They wanted us to make sure all the residents knew (and told any of their visitors) that the Campus police were really police and could really arrest you, so don't think they were campus security... and that campus security shared radios with the police, so don't be a dick to them either. All of which is just so stupid, newly unsupervised 18 year olds don't get arrested for stupid stuff just because they wanted to seem tough when security told them to stop doing whatever idiot things they were doing.

[@ATEC101]

@@MB-xw1tu But, DUUude! I just got a metal cassette copy of the first CD by [80's band probably] and I still have 5 speakers left on the boom box!! Actually watched someone bite a Pink Floyd album to prove the robustness of the media. F'd up one of the solos in Money.

[@sebbychou]

Reminds me of one of my friend's first investigations where a criminal took a picture of his hidden stash/lab in the middle of nowhere bragging about how nobody will ever find it... except the metadata had the exact GPS coordinates in there so it was found immediately.

[@pizzlerot2730]

Legendary 👍

[@zaclentz4593]

I'm almost ashamed of how hard I laughed at "illegal eagle."

[@zaclentz4593]

@@VectorOfKnowledge 100% shame-free laughter

[@VectorOfKnowledge]

@@zaclentz4593 😂😂😂

[@MasonDixonAutistic]

We need to see more of that guy; he seems to be 'based and crime-pilled'

[@lukasmautner4596]

Illegal Eagle gives off really strong Prison Mike vibes

[@AdorableFennec]

​@@VectorOfKnowledgeblack markeet parakeet

[@davidhayden6481]

"So, I mean, do you apologize to the cops for it?" "Not really." Love it, honestly.

[@RhelrahneTheIdiot]

He stole gas from the police? Based!

[@darrenswails]

@@RhelrahneTheIdiot you spelled "idiot" wrong

[@RhelrahneTheIdiot]

@@darrenswails Okay bootlicker

[@Fail-harold]

@@RhelrahneTheIdiot based on what? You mean to tell me he was _inspired_ by something to do that? *(This is a joke)*

[@adog3129]

@@darrenswails spelled hero wrong

[@gengarzilla1685]

I like the thought of IllegalEagle constantly trying and failing to get a hit on his lawyer archenemy like some kind of sitcom villain.

[@andreaitt2321]

But Illegal Eagle can never beat 'THE POWER OF ATTORNEY'!

[@kadebrockhausen]

This is not legal advice but practical advice: DO NOT USE MILK OF YOU'VE BEEN PEPPER SPRAYED. Use water to wash it out! You do not want to risk milk in your eyes, you don't want it to start curdling or not leaving your eye cavity. Water is always the safest bet!

[@erinschmidt8633]

Not planning on getting peppersprayed, but thank you

[@ausferret]

Some folks use bananas.

[@erinschmidt8633]

@@ausferret You Sir, are dirty.

[@agent__berry]

@arthurmorgan8978 shut up please

[@smilwastaken]

@Arthur Morgan It mostly applies if you're at a protest

[@zrebbesh]

I saw a great video years back where a couple of burglars had broken into the home of a guy who left a video camera on to try to catch his parrot talking. So at one point, both of them looked straight into the camera for a minute and discussed whether or not it was worth stealing - and decided the TV was a better prize.

[@pineforest1442]

The TV? I’m no criminal, but wouldn’t it be better to steal stuff you can actually stuff in your pockets?

[@literalantifaterrorist4673]

@@pineforest1442 What good's a single torn out security camera gonna be at the pawn shop?

[@pineforest1442]

@@literalantifaterrorist4673 actually quite a bit. Now they probably don’t want to get the security camera either because it would cause suspicion, but even an iPhone can give you quite a deal of money.

[@JewTube001]

@@literalantifaterrorist4673 small quality electronics are the best thing to steal after jewelry.

[@CaptainMarvelsSon]

I know this happened in several places, but I remember when one of the bigger cities near me sent out "contest winner" postal mail to people who had arrest warrants (they may be hiding, but being told they get free money drew many out). Dozens of criminals walked into what looked like a celebration only to be arrested in the back room.

[@Kellethorn]

Lmao

[@Cannabidragon]

Yess!! They did it with Playstations too 🤣🤣🤣

[@firewoman2863]

Washington Redskins tickets!

[@Mike90317]

I love that.

[@ianfinrir8724]

That's how they got my uncle, told him he won a free TV.

[@georgeashley6643]

Last year, a group of kids set fire to the front of a shop that I worked at. They would have got away with it… if they hadn’t put them doing it on Instagram

[@JargonMadjin]

The Scooby Doo reboot sounds interesting "I woud have gotten away with it too, if it hadn't been for my own vanity." "I think you mean stupidity."

[@nikotine1030]

I remember when I was in school getting my phone stolen. Oddly enough, it didn’t seem to appear anywhere on “find my phone”, which meant that the thief didn’t decide to take it, but to turn it off entirely and hide it in the school. I was extremely lucky to find it, although not without the help of some teachers. It seemed, however, that the thief would get away with this with no repercussions… At least that was until I decided to check the camera roll and find that the idiot that stole it had recorded himself, and with such blatant proof I was able to incriminate him of his wrongdoing.

[@michellecrocker2485]

It’s like a keychain I had in the 90s. “Everybody’s entitled to be stupid but you’re abusing the privilege “ some people are abusing the privilege of a calamitous lapse in judgement

[@Cannabidragon]

I remember that keychain!! I had it too lmfao 🤣

[@badbirdkc]

In my previous job, I produced/inspected microfilm. Most of it was digitizing documents for record keeping and preservation. One of our regular customers was a smallish town's police department. While inspecting a roll of film, one case caught my eye. A teenager, who was in the custody of his mother, ran off and took his infant with him. He had been dealing with court ordered therapy and other assorted things for being in previous legal trouble. He even mailed his mother a letter teller her not to look for her and that she and the police would never find him. Well, they found him. They found him because he logged into his Xbox Live account while hiding out in his dad's basement.

[@Heretowatchvideos123]

💀

[@scottlarson1548]

It's hard to imagine how Nixon could have been prosecuted if he hadn't kindly recorded every detail of his criminal activity on audio tape.

[@akaimizu1]

Or if it happened in today's climate, where a person in any high enough political position could have everything recorded, for everyone to see, and still have the ability to dodge prosecution, at least for quite a while.

[@firebirdkurt]

But he was a republican hunter has the FBI covering for him and no charges for the thousands of crimes

[@wexplo15]

@@akaimizu1 I'm sure everything Orangeface did was recorded.

[@gengarzilla1685]

Dumb criminals are really about as old as the concept of crime itself.

[@KyrenDinh]

Was Nixon prosecuted? I thought he resigned and then was pre-emptively pardoned after

[@darylcheshire1618]

before the internet and social media, my favourite story was that some PD in the US told a bunch of fugitives that they had won cash prizes from a radio station and many of them turned up and some didn’t believe that it was a sham and they were under arrest. It was televised and shown around the world.

[@vespernight4236]

I'm always baffled by how many petty criminals are very stupid. But thinking about it you have to be pretty dumb to do low level crimes when the payout really isn't worth the risk

[@darylcheshire1618]

@@vespernight4236 Yes they are dumb but there were work collegues who were (apparently) clever but rorted the government department I worked for. I thought you would always get found out even if years later. I suspect they start with a small thing and they dig themselves into a hole. One person who was rorting cars I knew regarded public servants with contempt and I wondered if she thought she was too smart to be caught.

[@badluck5647]

Please 🙏, do record your crimes! It's hysterical for the rest of us

[@rustystratten499]

Second this, we all need your entertainment, record please

[@LucasImpulse]

recording tax evasion

[@nasonguy]

Yes please. Entertaining for us. Must make detective's jobs much easier too.

[@auntymarushkafah]

"Got milk?"

[@Blasted2Oblivion]

​@@nasonguy There was a fun one on court cam I believe. A dude was arrested for armed robbery and was being questioned by a detective. He said admitted to it and one other at a hair salon. The detective said to him "The hair salon is just a bonus because I didn't even know about that one."

[@bananapanda9805]

The one I remember the most is that woman who live streamed herself drunk driving, and thus her college chose to immediately terminate her scholarship upon hearing the news

[@whiteraven181]

Good for them. A rare time when I'll agree with a scholarship being terminated over a photo. Being drunk in public? Kind of rude and obnoxious. Smoking pot? Literally less dangerous than alcohol. Drunk driving? One of the least forgivable crimes there is.

[@nettack]

Only topped by Anne Heche who did it shortly beforehand. The law did not need to intervene afterwards.

[@janey783]

There's a subpoena out there for my tinder conversation after a guy bragged about burning down a bar in North Dakota. Hope they got him.

[@Aredel]

He must have thought that Tinder is a platform for arsonists to brag about their work.

[@elha7982]

@@Aredel Lol yeah ;)

[@stinks7065]

Wow I’ve met a lot of braggards on tinder but bragging about destruction of property is a new one. I’m kind of curious to know if that ever works for him

[@witchdoctor1394]

Girl, what kinda guys are you swiping right to???

[@AndaraBledin]

@@witchdoctor1394 He was obviously [puts on shades]... smoking hot.

[@theKillingJokes]

I know we're all thinking the same thing: Illegal Eagle needs his own regular segment.

[@baananoxx]

Damn, I should listen to this Illegal Eagle guy He seems like a knowledgeable and trustworthy citizen.

[@briannelson27]

SMASH THAT LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE BUTTON SO I CAN SMASH THESE WINDOWS!!!!

[@Lmcv82]

He's a criminal lawyer... A CRIMINAL lawyer

[@finadoggie]

@@Lmcv82 good pun

[@DuranmanX]

Love how the advice on this channel is never "don't do crimes" but "don't get caught"

[@PROVOCATEURSK]

He was taught to protect criminals.

[@aronasmundurjonasson3175]

It's a lawyer's channel, and a lawyer gotta make money

[@klyxes]

Gotta accept people will do them. When I was in air force bases that focus on training, The sergeants/master sergeants always said " if you're gonna do something stupid, don't be stupid about it".

[@LOLWHATBRO]

The best way to not get caught doing a crime is to not do crimes :D

[@jur4x]

@@PROVOCATEURSK He once said in the video something like "if you don't know law exists, doesn't mean you are not breaking it" or something like that. Basically there are tons of laws most people don't even know they're breaking on everyday basis.

[@adamruiz3683]

I got massive 'How Do You Do, Fellow Kids?' energy from Illegal Eagle and I love it. Hope we see more of him in the future.

[@redneckrambo9626]

The irony of the "arrest" selfie photo is effing GLORIOUS 😂😂😂

[@williamedge5130]

My Therapist: "Illegal Eagle isn't real, he can't hurt you." Illegal Eagle:

[@grmpEqweer]

He wouldn't. Although if you buy any product he's selling, good luck with that.

[@tomilad]

Man I remembered about ilegal eagle from wolf 2 blitzmensch ad

[@superleipoman]

Tonight we kill the bird lawyer.

[@Tetsujinhanmaa]

Hey LegalEagle, if you ever do a part two, you can cover Craig Lynch. Guy escaped prison and spent up to 20 hours a day on Facebook taunting cops.

[@Trumpeter667]

And the stories continue - a few weeks ago someone in my area went to trial for murder and one of the major pieces of evidence was a video he had gotten one of his buddies to take that showed him in the act (even confirming that the camera was rolling). The video was then shared over Snapchat where it was turned over to the police. I think the whole town just did a collective facepalm… Good for the prosecution’s case, though.

[@Karak-_-]

This's not just stupid, that's messed up. Why would you record murdering someone?

[@Trumpeter667]

@@Karak-_- that, I do not know. I think maybe it was like a drive-by where they weren’t sure they’d hit or weren’t planning on hitting a person, but still it’s messed up

[@gratuitouslurking8610]

Literally yesterday, alleged human trafficker and general grifter Andrew Tate finally had Romanian police catch up with him due to a pizza box as some form of weird flex/attempt to start an argument with Greta Thumburg Man, this timeline be cray-cray.

[@Egerit100]

Some kids at the middle school I went to broke into a neighboring school, broke windows, trashed the cafeteria and kitchen, etc. (Btw I had never even heard of this school and when I asked someone why they did it to that specific school they were like 'bc they're our enemies'💀). They did all of it without wearing gloves, face coverings, AND they uploaded videos of this to TikTok

[@Michael-bb1cw]

⁠@@Egerit100 Can't say I’m surprised they made no effort to hide that they were responsible. Middle school students aren’t exactly known for their intelligence and smart decision making.

[@aurizzistic]

I love that Devin's idea of being a criminal is just NOT using a 55 gallon drum of the strongest, most expensive hair gel his lawyer money can buy lmao. And sunglasses, can't forget those.

[@Mrinsecure]

"Crimes are cool and you should definitely record them in exhausting detail." - Totally Not a Cop

[@TheModdedwarfare3]

How do you do, fellow kids?

[@mandos-studio]

Whata crack a lackin

[@gengarzilla1685]

I think I've heard that advice before. From a lovely chap called Paul Ice.

[@AdroSmiley]

I’d love to see a video (or maybe series) on incredibly smart criminals who only failed at least in part due to the skilled work of lawyers bringing them to justice. Like Oceans 11 level shenanigans that came crumbling down around them at trial. Just the idea that these people planned something so elaborate and brilliant but missed one crucial detail and during cross examination they play themselves in the end. The look of defeat would be priceless

[@stevecuddles]

I think smart criminals mostly only get caught by working with dumb criminals

[@Compucles]

That's the best part of playing the "Ace Attorney" games.

[@wizardsuth]

There are a few episodes of _Columbo_ in which a premeditated murder leaves very little evidence, but the culprit commits a second murder to hide the first, and it's much sloppier.

[@stephen3164]

The amount of people wearing “1776” shirts and/or shouting to the camera what their intentions that day were is just staggering.

[@goonerbear8659]

But please, continue about how it was an antifa setup.

[@YourLocalZombie]

It's amazing what people will say when they think they're going to win.

[@Brett_S_420]

They chant "TREASON! TREASON!" as they commit TREASON.

[@Brett_S_420]

@@goonerbear8659 Trump wants to pardon the "Antifa" people in jail!

[@DoctorBiobrain]

Part of the issue is that they seem to imagine the Revolutionary War was legal, as if the Declaration of Independence gave permission to the Founding Fathers to revolt and they weren’t punished if they were caught. And so they’re just following that tradition and think they’re allowed to attack our government if they’re pushed too far and the government can’t fight back. This is what happens when you learn about reality from Hollywood movies and think everything is justified if you’re the protagonist.

[@qloshae]

We just had a case here in Sweden where two women murdered another woman and part of the reason they got caught was because of the smartphone GPS putting them at the location of the body at the estimated time and because one of them was googling stuff like, "Ways to kill someone" and "Best ways to get revenge on an ex-friend". So yea, they'd probably have gotten away with it due to having buried her in the middle of a forest. That is, if they hadn't been so incredibly reliant on their devices.

[@tejaswoman]

THANK YOU for acknowledging the anti-semitic dog whistle in that last segment. I get so tired of seeing that crap on Twitter all the time, report it constantly, despite knowing it probably won't be acted on ever.

[@itemushmush]

it was an amazing segment. absolute props to him for being able to cut through the BS and tell us all how it is!

[@embrikchloraker8186]

LegalEagle is pretty based. I get the feeling he's rather progressive but doesn't wear it on his sleeve.

[@FlareBlitzBanana]

@@embrikchloraker8186 I appreciate that about him. His coverage of the Roe v Wade reversal was pretty well balanced and presented both sides of the argument equally, even if he may heavily disagree with the supreme court’s decision.

[@jimwormmaster]

Dog whistle?

[@Siegmernes]

@@jimwormmaster Dog whistle is a term that basically means a phrase that other people "In the know" will recognize but that you can deny. It's like saying "Goldberg" to refer to jews but being able to say "I just picked a random name, don't get so upset" when someone calls you out.

[@Deathstrike613]

A few years ago, the local sheriffs department sent out letters to people with warrants informing them that they won tickets to the Ozzy Osbourne concert that included a shuttle to the show. They just had to meet at a certain bar to claim their prize. Once checked in, they were informed of their outstanding warrant, and promptly arrested.

[@MononymousM]

Is that not literally the plot of a Simpsons episode?

[@kiraina25]

​@@MononymousMAnd also part of a TMNT episode (the other half involved Krang airlifting the place all the criminals had gathered so that he could eliminate the competition).

[@michaelthornton4506]

The first story reminds me of when this couple stole my Mom's iPad right out of her car. I was maybe 13 or 14 at the time. Luckily for her (and eventually us), my Dad got her a new one. Once she set up her new one with her iCloud and everything, a weird email started popping up asking us to sign in, along with there being photos of a couple we didn't know in her photos. My major strength with computers is knowing what to search on Google, and I was able to find their Facebook by searching their email. My Mom got the old iPad back within two weeks. It baffles me today that this (adult) couple was SO STUPID that they left a breadcrumb trail obvious enough for a 13/14 year old kid to track

[@TheModdedwarfare3]

Good work, detective.

[@matthewkreps3352]

Does the average person know how a TV works? Does the typical computer user know the programming language of their most common apps? That couple didnt know how Apple accounts work.

[@michaelthornton4506]

@@matthewkreps3352 Apple iCloud is pretty self-explanatory, as is wiping an iPad to factory settings if it's used. Barring that, everything is a Google Search away, barring that... Don't steal someone's personal belongings out of their car! Sorry I don't have sympathy for someone who robbed my mother :/

[@christophergarner8746]

We just had an amazing instance of someone replying to a Facebook post of the local sheriff's department asking why he wasn't listed as one of the county's most wanted. It ended exactly as you'd have expected...

[@ausferret]

Has anyone done that and had no criminal record and no evidence of criminal acts?

[@becauseimafan]

​@@ausferret 😂

[@selinesbeau]

You'd get along well with the Casual Criminalist. He's always like, "Don't write down your crimes! Well, do so you can get caught, but DON'T WRITE DOWN YOUR CRIMES! C'mon dude!"

[@triciac.5078]

I came looking for this comment :)

[@PhantomNull13]

I don't know about you, but I really need some kind of notebook to remind me about this. I keep writing mine down by accident.

[@johnymey4034]

Yes, all hail the whistle boy

[@auntymarushkafah]

"If you're going to crime, you should use a Samsung."

[@Blasted2Oblivion]

I can't help thinking of that scene in Liar Liar. "Stop breaking the law a**hole!"

[@DorifutoRabbit]

Very brave to cook in a suit, I could be making food with my nice clothes hung up in the closet in another room and somehow still get food on them

[@slcRN1971]

😆😂🤣😆‼️ Right there with you. I put on a very nice new outfit and in less than half a day, it looks a mess! Yet if I wear something that I’ve worn many times, mysteriously it stays clean, unwrinkled and in great shape, for the whole day‼️

[@templarw20]

Reminds me of Simon Whistler’s Casual Criminalist channel, and his growing rules list. First is “Don’t write down you crimes.”

[@Al3xtheMeh]

SHUT UP FACT BOY!!

[@maxdanielj]

Simon should do a video like this on toptenz

[@templarw20]

@@maxdanielj Personally, I'd love to see a colab where Devon answers Simon's "WTF Legal System" questions.

[@timshelton5120]

The saddest part is.. We live in a world where powerful people don't get indicted unless they openly admit their crimes on line..

[@JewTube001]

we live in a society

[@pota2s561]

Even when they do admit their crime, sometimes people just ignore it

[@0011peace]

@@pota2s561 tjat jhappened to Roamn Polanski for lon gtime after he open moleedst his umder age GF

[@wizardsuth]

We live in a world where a former president of the most powerful nation on the planet has been convicted of numerous crimes and still isn't in prison. And he's so conceited and greedy he sells copies of his mug shots as collector's items.

[@-alovelygaycat-]

@@wizardsuth To be fair though that mugshot is golden

[@Saje3D]

Long before the internet, my friends and I decided never to do anything on camera that could even be misconstrued or misrepresented. Interesting to note people who grew up with the whole world looking over their shoulder couldn’t figure that one out.

[@hrodebertcoad9848]

Most can, but not everyone has fully functioning brains

[@kjpires]

These actions are not misconstructed or misrepresented: they are just straight-up illegal acts!

[@slcRN1971]

@@hrodebertcoad9848 : nor any common sense!!!

[@hrodebertcoad9848]

@@slcRN1971 As much as I agree with the sentiment, I cringe at the phrase "common sense" It's just refers to what most people find to be intuitive, rather than being something accurate enough to rely upon. Or in other words, one's common sense is only as good as their teaching and experiences.

[@chesspiece4257]

most people who grew up with it do, but unproblematic people don’t get famous for being unproblematic

[@eliz_scubavn]

There was a case in my old town where two car thieves went on a spree of stealing cars. The police arrested them on two charges and in the process of investigating these two cases they found videos of them not just stealing the two cars they knew about, they found videos of them stealing a number of other vehicles, that were all open cases. They got charged with 7 counts of car theft.

[@tskmaster3837]

I was not prepared for Illegal Eagle. Then again, there's nothing in the world that could have prepared me.

[@eponack]

My father’s friend was a defense lawyer. I was a big question asked and always took the opportunity to pick his brain when it would arise. The thing that sticks with me that he told me was criminals are idiots. He said he could always tell who made a mistake, who would learn from their error, and who would not learn, becoming a repeat customer.

[@kitsuneprincess4637]

I had no idea how much I needed IllegalEagle until now. Please bring him back!

[@ClichéGuevara-2814]

Taking selfies now just makes more sense. Back in the old days, we had to do self-portraits and oils can be a tricky material to paint with at the best of times . Tried a pastel selfie after a string of burglaries, didn't really work that well.

[@SomeYouTubeTraveler]

Scholars say roughly 47% of ancient Greek urns depicting warriors in combat are actually all selfies, mostly by this one dude who loved to run around naked and spear people

[@VosperCDN]

Definitely feel a charcoal sketch would have worked better for those post-burglary selfies, but the pastel's do have the greater appeal with the viewing public.

[@TheModdedwarfare3]

@@VosperCDN don't use charcoal because the police could see you got your hands dirty and it could give you away

[@bmlgordon]

Acrylics for the quick drying time and easy cleanup.

[@weepingscorpion8739]

I borrowed my mother's car when going to work one day. When I came back the side mirrors had been broken. I phoned the police, some officers arrived, they made a report, so that our insurance would pay for the damages but told me that they'd likely never catch the perp. - Fast forward a few weeks, I get a call from the police asking if we had had any more expenses, because they had caught the guy and were collecting evidence. When I asked how they caught him, they replied: "he allowed himself to be filmed breaking the mirrors."

[@nerd1000ify]

I once got an unsolicited call from the police: "we caught the guy who broke into your car." I didn't know my car had been broken into. What had happened was this individual got into my building's 'secure' carpark, and in full view of the CCTV cameras went around trying the doors of every car he could get to. Apparently I'd forgotten to lock mine... but I don't keep anything worth stealing in there, so he got in, looked around, and promptly got out again. At least he had the courtesy to close the door behind himself. I should note that there is a CCTV camera literally next to my parking space, so of course the police were able to identify this gentleman and my car license plates. I don't know what came of it, but I assume it wasn't the only thing on the guy's rap sheet.

[@JordanPlayz158]

It is sad that Signal and other E2EE apps are being associated with criminals :(

[@kempolar9768]

Sucks that if there is even a minor possibility to misuse something, people will. Just add that to the ever growing list of reasons to hate humanity.

[@deadlikedisco4726]

I'm not a fan of three letter agencies, but I have to hand it to the FBI on project Trojan Shield. That was such a hilarious move. Absolute legends.

[@nettack]

Better the programmer will stay undisclosed for all times. Until all eternity he will remain the greatest snitch, not receiving a stitch, but every single acquaintance of him landing in a ditch... after being gruesomely tortured, every single step being meticulously documented and sent to him.

[@Rebecca_The_Dragon]

Im surprised you didnt mention the stupid trend of kids filming themselves in grocery stores throwing milk everywhere and running away. I deal with this nuisance on a weekly basis where I work and Cali police wont do anything to enforce it.

[@dariog3053]

Some people beg for milk, while others waste it. Outrageous.

[@robert23456789]

That’s why I don’t support the blue there useless u have cctv there to make the case quick and easy 4 them

[@adrianthoroughgood1191]

Down with that sort of thing!

[@CactusCanon]

Cops won’t even do anything if you have video footage of a person stealing a package from your porch with a clear view of their face and you tell the cops exactly where to find the person because that’s not worth their time. They need to spend their time doing important things like sitting in their cars looking at people commit traffic safety violations and not doing anything😂😂

[@walkingbushie3568]

Throw the milk back at them.

[@Martcapt]

I like to imagine Devin is just the right type of lunatic to cook in a suit

[@kamcorder3585]

But he wears an apron to protect his Indochino suit

[@suzbone]

Thanks for the free fantasy fuel?

[@agilitykissa]

I do everything in a suit lol I like suits :)

[@S8_10]

@@agilitykissa Barney, is that you?

[@jazzycat8917]

@@kamcorder3585 Indochino needs to branch into aprons. For the business gourmet

[@superpumpkin1065]

"We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office."-Aesop

[@godzy323]

I was floored with that Illegal Eagle bit! I can totally see him doing a video on crimes you could totally commit

[@CDN_Bookmouse]

Love this hot new content from Illegal Eagle. I feel like he really connects with me, a Youth. I'm sure being subbed to it can't possibly tie me to any illegal intent in any similar crimes I may or may not commit!

[@dahleno2014]

As somebody who used to be… around this kind of stuff on a decent sized scale, I was always baffled when I saw those around me post stories about… “deals” on their products. Suffice it to say I stayed away from them (and now I’m away from all of it)

[@virginiatyree6705]

Good move. Stay safe. v

[@julietfischer5056]

When it comes to drugs, the joke is "That's why they call it 'dope.'"

[@Jeffrey_Tyler]

Over 500 arrests in 48 hours is one HELL of an operation.

[@AgaiLazen]

Please do more videos like this, we need more than the constant doom and gloom that this decade seems destined to become

[@nasis18]

I read about a guy who broke into a home. He proceeded to log into Facebook on their computer. He left the house, and he didn't log out of his Facebook. Giving the police all his personal information.

[@kathrynsamuelson1983]

Way back in 1974 my first year criminal professor said: "Why do criminals get caught? Because they're stupid."

[@spyone4828]

I follow a news column on stupid criminals, and at first I was simply appalled, but I came to realize that it's like fishing in a shallow pool: "This is a group of people who couldn't come up with a better plan than sticking up a liquor store. It is hardly surprising that some of them are VERY stupid."

[@aaronself2411]

Which is funny, given most crimes go unsolved. So, who's dumber. The idiots who commit crimes and get away with them, or the people who fail to catch them. I've heard that line from multiple lawyers/officers/professors but the reality is always so far removed from that saying it genuinely makes me think someone's stupid for saying it. Hell, where I live less than 5% of all murders get solved. Meaning, you have a FAR better chance of getting away with murder, than going to jail. And that's fuckin MURDER. Who KNOWS how many smaller crimes go unsolved.

[@christopherg2347]

For a example, see Sean Sanders, June 18, 1987

[@christopherg2347]

@@aaronself2411 That sounds more owed to the shitty place you live in, if there are too many cases or suspects.

[@Sorcerers_Apprentice]

Also, they do so many they're eventually caught by law of averages. Criminals actually get away with a fair amount of crimes they commit, but that doesn't mean you should go live a life of crime. Criminals generally lead really crappy lives. Even if they're never caught, the vast majority have no friends or family who will talk to them. They can't trust anyone because the only people who want to be around them are as nasty and unstable as they are and will stab them in the back the moment it gives them an advantage. They have no future prospects, don't know where their next meal is coming from, all they can think about is how to get a few dollars to survive the next day.

[@hizzsc2992]

To be honest you are brilliant. Absolute flawless hosting skills,perfect tone, good rhythm. Literal professional quality TV anchor.(which you actually might be, idk your story at all) Vidz are entertaining and yet educational. Thumbs up.

[@FoxMacLeod2501]

I wonder how many of the unsuspecting Anom middlemen were knocked off, having supplied those magma-hot phones to what sound like verrrry high-level shot callers... Great video, as always, Devin!

[@thesollylama130]

Can the lawyers here explain why people are virtually never charged with perjury when they have been proven to lie on the stand? For example Alex Jones was admonished directly by the judge several times for blatantly lying under oath. Why was he not remanded for criminal charges of perjury? Also, is that a charge only the judge can make or can the state prosecutor bring those charges as well? We hear the threat of perjury quite a bit but it seems incredibly rare for it to ever be used, even in cases where the evidence is overwhelming.

[@electrowave114]

Iirc, it's because it's usually really difficult to prosecute for it. I don't remember the details, but LegalEagle covered it in one of the videos where he talks about that right-wing Alex dude's court cases.

[@ohauss]

I'd assume most of the time, in cases like Alex Jones', the added penalty, compared to what he's getting anyway, just isn't worth the effort.

[@efulmer8675]

Perjury by itself also doesn't carry much of a penalty so the amount that the state might get out of it is very low compared to the cost and the trouble of actually prosecuting it. This is also why the saying about the FBI, "if they're asking you questions, they already know the answer, and if they already know the answer, you're already going to jail", is so strong: the FBI doesn't prosecute anyone that they don't have a slam dunk case on because prosecuting on edge cases is so difficult.

[@thesollylama130]

@@ohauss I can see that to a point, but that logic extends to literally every facet of the law. We expend enormous amounts of time, money, and energy putting people in jail for a bag of weed. All with the excuse that the prosecution serves as a deterrent to others even if the punishment doesn't actually fit the crime. Lying under oath being against the law is essentially crying wolf when you can do so to the point where a judge flatly calls it out- and yet nothing is done. I don't understand why anyone would take that oath (or the court demanding it) seriously when you know it's a farce.

[@adrianthoroughgood1191]

IANAL but I think the rules may be different if you are the defendant vs a witness. A defendant who is guilty is kind of expected to lie. If you charged everyone who lied with perjury then it'd almost be automatic that any conviction came with a side order of perjury. That'd be a bit pointless. If they are found innocent by the jury then subsequently charging the with perjury would undermine the finding of the jury.

[@AdrianParsons]

Once, just before digital photography took off, I was working in a store where there was a break in. The people who did it took selfies posing with the stolen goods. Using disposable cameras they stole at the same time. They also (separately , one at a time) woke me up at my home to try to get me to open the store early (before the AM break-in) so they could buy cigarettes. None were old enough to smoke.

[@YOSSARIAN313]

The guy who siphoned the gas and then refused to apologize to the cops is a legend. Love him

[@CoreIdeas]

Seeing Illegal Eagle was a brain breaking moment. I was not prepared for this sort of anarchy.

[@jessicasnow9007]

The availability of location-tracking tech is really concerning. It’s giving the crazy stalkers more information and better access to their targets. And it’s becoming more and more unrealistic to go around without a phone to avoid being tracked.

[@ausferret]

A Faraday cage can block signals into and out of a phone.

[@lucashowell8689]

They can just give you some headphones

[@mochaandmuses]

I love that fact you try to look like a criminal and fail spectacularly because you're such a lawyer. LOL

[@Laurabeck329]

Call that the cop syndrome

[@JonPITBZN]

Some lawyers are also criminals. A shocking number of Donald J. Trump's attorneys turn out to be this, for some reason.

[@sams3533]

It's Spiderman 3 all over again

[@TalkingVidya]

"We got an undercover cop, it could be any of us" The undercover cop:

[@barbiincognito13]

I got a real "Prison Mike" vibe XD Illegal Eagle would have been great on The Office

[@drrenard1277]

In regards to stolen phone story, I keep my phone synced with server and it keeps a log of gps and tower IDs as well. My last phone was stolen and was able to be used to find exactly where the phone was. Thank you Syncthing.

[@kraqur]

More Illegal Eagle! Even better, sister channels such as "Woe Crow Bureau" for enforcement-related issues, "Capt Smack Sparrow" for drug-related nuances, and even "Murky Berkley Turkey" for school/educational badness! LET THE FLOCK FLY!!!!

[@kneau]

Find a way to incorporate the Maltese falcon & this has my support!

[@TSDT]

Don't forget the Stool Pigeon for the real inside scoop on crime!

[@edwardpincus]

This video is hilarious - quick, caustic and to be celebrated. L-Eagle, you’ve outdone yourself! I noticed when “Baked Alaska” was calling out for “milk,’ he didn’t seem to care if it were regular or chocolate. Funny how prejudices can disappear in a crisis…

[@grmpEqweer]

Hehehe!

[@virginiatyree6705]

Agreed! The post is HILARIOUS! v

[@TheModdedwarfare3]

I like strawberry milk for my pepper spray shenanigans.

[@TehAnimationSparxx]

More like W-Eagle

[@KingBobXVI]

From other streams of the event, it's even more pathetic - he was crying like a baby for milk because "pepper spray", but was on video earlier putting some kind of soap or lemon juice in his own eyes. He was, unironically, trying to be a "crisis actor", lol.

[@olofskivarp]

My mom managed to get her home burglar arrested because he recharged his phone with her card (which he managed to do several days after blocking it...) and the police used that to find him 🤣 It still was after he had managed to sell everything ☹️

[@ItsDreamplay]

Hey LegalEagle! Would love for you to add credits to the end of your videos to show some love for the rest of your team. Cheers for the content!

[@zesky6654]

Bad idea, it would make them targets for trolls.

[@plodiN3]

Great to see Mike being appreciated all over youtube.

[@outisoutisoutis]

I came to the comments just to say this. This was my favourite internet cross over of all time!!

[@KianaWolf]

Prosecuting attorney: "Do record your crimes."

[@unitrader403]

better: "Have you stopped recording your Crimes? Answer Yes or No!"

[@alexanderblackie6704]

Objection! Hey legal Egal. I love your show, I am currently studying law in South Africa, and your show was what inspired me to get into the legal practice. Please could you review the "Tapdancing around the witness" Scene from the musical/movie Chicago? It's an awsome legal scene, a little fanciful, but a really cool example of a perfect cross-examination against a hostile witness.

[@redbarchetta8782]

I remember watching the Jan 6th events in real time laughing at all the people with their cell phones out. Dumb, dumb, dumb. :)

[@patrickjordan2233]

Documenting and tracking devices...because they believed they were going to be successful in their Coup,..

[@YourLocalZombie]

@@patrickjordan2233 They were so worried about tracking devices in the vaccine!

[@TheModdedwarfare3]

@@patrickjordan2233 History is written by the victor and they thought they were going to be pardoned by Trump, so why not record what would have been the most important event in American history? It makes sense in a messed up way.

[@carschmn]

That dude that submitted his own mugshot was priceless

[@pkmnfrk]

Detective: "Quick, techie, run an analysis to determine where this picture was taken!" Techie: "Ok, it was at this specific location" Detective: "Wow, how did you pin it down so fast? Surveillance cameras? Artificial intelligence?" Techie: "Nah, just looking at the picture's location tags"

[@FirstIsa]

Would be happy to go back to using hello fresh if they can deliver my order in a bear proof box. Edit: I literally can't do any food delivery service due to being in the rural Rockies. I've tried twice with hello fresh. From what my security cams saw the first package was stolen by a cougar which had the decency to carry the whole thing off. The second was ripped apart by a bear directly on my porch.

[@Barlakopofai]

Why don't you buy the bear proof box for them to put the deliveries in?

[@rraaiin]

@@Barlakopofai they would probably just put it next to the box

[@FirstIsa]

@@rraaiin that's exactly what they did to a friend

[@FaydOgolon]

Knowing how the terms "cougar" and "bear" apply to humans, I can imagine some incredible footage of your packages being stolen.

[@Barlakopofai]

@@FirstIsa Use paypal for payments, every time they leave it outside the box, send a refund request through paypal. Paypal is amazingly customer friendly when online companies do shitty things and still expect you to pay for it

[@monroerobbins7551]

7:18 THAT’S WHAT THAT PATTERN’S CALLED?? Dude, you’ve answered a question that’s loomed in my brain for years that has come roaring back, to finally be vanquished.

[@idontknowyoumitch]

My niece broke into someones house and assaulted the woman in the shower with her friend, someone they had beef with. A third party taped the whole thing and she uploaded it to the internet. Her family is trying get her bail and im like WHY. If you wanna throw money somewhere donate that shit or something.

[@grmpEqweer]

Indeed. Niece should probably plea bargain.

[@Mad-Lad-Chad]

@@grmpEqweer Given what was probably on the footage (the woman was in the shower when the assault/recording began) the crime probably has a sexual component to it now as far as charges. She may not even get the chance.

[@idontknowyoumitch]

@@Mad-Lad-Chad i hope she doesn’t. Shes ruined the lives of her 4 kids and is a druggie. She needs a hard life check.

[@Tetragrammaton22]

They can throw that money at me. I'll deal with it for 'em.

[@taylorlibby7642]

KZbin seriously underestimates my commitment to never buying anything from an unskippable ad.

[@Chefkraken]

I don't think I was expecting to hear the phrase "sheer optical girth" in a LegalEagle video today

[@tie-dyeshyguy3237]

I love how he called Out googles computer generation for HD images the fact that they’re advertising you can remove people from your pictures just means to me that cops are gonna be doing this on evidence a lot.