*FEMALE NOISES* - Let's Read Women of Marvel 2023 (2)

And now for the exciting conclusion of Women of Marvel 2023... This comic is so women, amirite?
Cheers to the editor @OzayGG on twitter~
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[@dannphan]

Thanks for joining me on this last part for the Women of Marvel read-throughs! It's been a blast~ (つ≧▽≦)つ If you'd like to support me and my upcoming comics, please feel free to check out my website on burningstarcomics.net/ Or join the phanclub and donate to see sneak peeks of my latest upcoming comics www.subscribestar.com/dannphan

[@thanglongnguyenvu3815]

Marvel comic lawyers arguing each other like highschoolers cringe me. Edit: Forget highschoolers. I set a mountainous bar. My fault.

[@joaquinvanhouten]

This is unironically the kind of dialogue the boys and I used to write back in 5th grade 💀

[@longtsun8286]

You're right, "current year" Marvel Comics writers unironically write like elementary school students. Jesus Christ, no wonder American comic book fans are turning to manga!

[@robinthrush9672]

Well, She-Hulk committed assault and battery in a court room that somehow allows ice cream inside. Y'know, it'd be both funnier and more insulting if she's just carried him out and he couldn't do anything about it. Her punching him just makes her look violent.

[@honorsharpe]

For the record I think that wasn't ice cream the lawyer had ...It looks like a snoball....a snack/dessert food in NO....and was more than likely what Monica and Khamala were supposed to have at the end of their story and thus woulda been a cute little wink and nod to Shulkies usual 4th wall breaking.....but the artist who did the actual Nawlins set story didn't know what the hell a snoball was...sooo drew ice cream.😄

[@MrEmpireBuilder0000]

I was gonna say the same thing. These writers. And for supposedly "woke" people, that's an alarming level of unnecessary brutality. These are the same people harping about de-escalation. But I guess if it's a white guy taking it, nobody cares?

[@melodymakesart]

What is with modern She-Hulk writers not knowing how to write courtroom scenes? If they're going for comedy, they should at least ham it up a bit more. Phoenix Wright, for example, doesn't have proper courtroom conduct, but the games are still entertaining. (Honestly, I love the idea of "Phoenix Wright, but with She-Hulk and other superheroes," but I feel like Marvel wouldn't be able to do it justice...)

[@army103]

So, by adding the electricity from a building to the heroes' combined power, the villains went from being able to handle them both easily to completely overwhelmed, huh? That implies that the boost added a significant amount of juice to theirs, perhaps even doubling it...which means both Ms. Marvels together produce about as much energy as it takes to power a single hotel. That's kind of a far cry from the cosmic, world-ending energy levels they've been claimed to have at times!

[@enriquecabrera2137]

In the new marvel universe, when Fukushima had the meltdown after the tsunami, the entire universe was destroyed... Probably.

[@shawnboahene5231]

I get what you mean. Monica is absurdly powerful but it took everything she had to absorb the electricity from the hotel that should be the bare minimum of what she can do.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

the writers have no concept of electricity. For them it's magic that runs on wires and can do wondrous things

[@robinthrush9672]

Other signs the school bus is flipped: the emergency door handle and the STOP sign are on the right-hand side of the picture when they should be on the left.

[@Bucketus.Lord.of.Buckets]

Dannphan made a faustian bargain: in exchange for eternal youth, she must read garbage such as this for her youtube channel for the rest of her existence

[@RambleOn07]

You can really see that they pay way too much for their writers.

[@enriquecabrera2137]

The writer strike so the best thing that could happen to entertainment. We can finally get a break from the cringe.

[@fernandod4046]

I hope they were all guest writers and not in house staff

[@farharbor3178]

True. But the larger problem is theyre drawing from a pool of people who aren’t writers. Nominally, they’re “writers” … but its likely their education … the work they’ve produced and the material that has gotten them promoted/ hired / rewarded isn’t quality (or even functional) fiction. They’re social media specialists, activists, and social critics who think they’re writers. They suck at this bc the “expertise”they’ve cultivated has nothing to do with narrative or character or storytelling best practice.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

considering the art and the use of 3D models and the fact that nobody noticed that stuff was flipped the wrong way, artists and editors are paid too much too

[@zombieneith7]

Even if they were only paid a $1, they were paid too much. This is sub-YA level trash writing.

[@Sousabird]

0:36 the artist wasn't exactly sure what women look like so they just took a shot in the dark.

[@thatHARVguy]

Like the people showering when Photon blacked out the hotel, amirite.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

@@thatHARVguy > Photon > blacked out HA

[@marcusaurelius5149]

1:54 - I remember reading comics decades old that would depict the text getting smaller until it's an ellipsis. Often it would break up the text with a few ellipsis before "droning on". I always loved that about Peter David's writing. It didn't inadvertently break the 4th wall.

[@markfurlong9542]

okay, I don't expect anybody to be able to answer this, but: on the last page, why did She-Hulk bother to roll-up her sleeve? like, her whole outfit basically gets torn to shreds, and the sleeve that she rolled-up is basically gone. it's not even the same arm that she uses when she punches that guy.

[@ReinoldFZ]

All those characters look so depowered that even normal police could just arrest them as if they were mere cosplayers. A far cry from Claremont and Manara's X-Women. Well, I will go out to twerk with my buddies o.O

[@jaytonius560]

She-Hulk’s face is what ours will look like when this series ends.

[@emperorxander666]

I heard Female noises and had to check it out

[@Tevildo]

You know, I learned something today. Preservation Hall was only founded in 1961, so the "over 50 years" quote is in fact accurate. I thought it was much older. Something good _can_ be extracted from the worst disasters, after all.

[@kingragnarok7302]

So... They just made a big case with a ton of different clients, charges and proof? God, it's like She-Hulk all over again.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

the woman in the court room is she-hulk, and the writing of she-hulk comics is on par with the show

[@godzillafan4033]

I cant believe the comic book industry isn't doing so well. This is brilliant. 😂

[@fearsomedeath26]

it look like she was debating that they were stealing energy and that ms marvel was beating them up but how did court room get ice cream IT WAS RECORDING of EVENTS HAPPENING lmao

[@greghannibal]

Almost reminds me of that She-Hulk one page story where she assaults a police officer to get at a guy she had already put in jail.

[@marcusaurelius5149]

"I think we need to ask who the REAL AGGRESSORS were here." Clunky writing.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

zero editing was involved, this is all first draft

[@VictorM_004]

I guess that expecting one of those comics to be like JLU's Grudge Match episode is just an optimistic dream lol

[@RagdollDustyCh]

When you first said "school bus is flipped" i was like "maybe thats the front of the bus where its for being able to be read in rearview mirrors?" Then i looked at the pic and thats definitely the back

[@milestrombley1466]

I can't wait for the Pride special issues. 🤣

[@JimmmyRaynor]

this is an amazing comic! the ridiculous faces, the lack of courtroom knowledge and antics from the men make this a great video to watch! I can't wait for part 3!

[@sfighter0085]

I think the best way to describe this year's "Women of Marvel" would be like this; "Women of Marvel 2023, a comic about women, written by women who don't know how to write women!"

[@robinthrush9672]

How can you write something that you can't even give a vague description of?

[@hassathunter2464]

or men... or even dogs.

[@AlleyKatPr0]

That was really bad...I was thinking about this (potentially) being the sort of thing that your grandma would buy you as a treat (because grandmas are always super-chill) because you (as a child) are going to stay the weekend and she will bake some cookies and generally spoil you...as part of that, she will buy you a nice comic to read with pretty pictures in it. Only problem is, Grandma can't see so well, and just grabbed the nearest comic she could see...Marvel get another comic sold, and, the people who created it mistakenly believe their comic is being chosen carefully, but is in fact just the uninviting victim of Grandma's Cataract operation and age-induced myopia... But, Grandmas are so chill, the automatic answer is always going to be a big thank you and a hug, as the world just keeps on turning.

[@jamierose9095]

The ability to instantly fix a broken dishwasher would be an amazing superpower.

[@Chest-HighWall]

This comic is spreading misinformation, everyone knows Women aren't real and are just something Hallmark made up for commerical purposes.

[@vermis8344]

SUB LOOHCS 🤣🤣🤣 How lazy can you get? In other news, ALL the dialogue in this comic is one step away from 'blah blah blah'. 7:33 This IS where the Disney+ She-Hulk writers ended up! Who else could write this, deem it good, and demand money and jazzhand-applause for it?

[@marcogenovesi8570]

2:45 oh wow they hired hacks from webtoon to do this masterpiece and no editors were involved at any point. How do you even not catch that a sign is flipped like that

[@psyrolz1626]

Im no artist but, my drawings arent that bad! Thanks artists of Marvel for this!

[@amazingfan15]

2:17 nice job catching that before the book went to print, editor. A+ work

[@lowerclassbrats77]

Hail to the Queef 💨

[@scottgun]

"What’s wrong with their faces?" This is how they fight TeH MaLe GaZe? Who knows?

[@sparaxisblanc2473]

"I demand a recount!!!" Sir, that's called an appeal.

[@dontgiveinfo]

Why do i feel that these marvel comics are written by Archie writers or Harvey Comics? Also?The Bingo card has to come back. It's a staple of this channel!

[@fernandod4046]

Everyone in that staff spotlight should be ashamed

[@dfo627]

Times like this I think... "How the hell is marvel still alive, other than Venom?"

[@scasimir1000]

Couldn't the superhero go down to the front desk? Explain to them that two super villains attacked her hence why there was an explosion in your building. I don't think they going to charge her parents for something someone else did.

[@Niever]

😂😂May as well do the whole Seinfeld Yadda Yadda Yadda in there

[@marshalt]

Can't tell if your a masochist for reading these comics, or a sadist for reading them to us.

[@mrpopsful]

This makes me feel better about my own amateur sketching ability

[@whiterabbit75]

1990s: We got a Marvel Swimsuit special! 2020s: We got nonsensical stories about "stronk womyn" tied together by a nonsensical story about a "stronk womyn"!

[@GHOSTRIDER373737]

I wonder has anyone reported these videos for self-harm yet?

[@the_cosine4353]

She-Hulk's mouth is like some one tried to use photoshop to make One Piece Chew's mouth look normal.

[@JonaGDP]

I need the bingo to come back if you are doing something like this again. It makes it much more bearable 😅

[@MrEmpireBuilder0000]

Using a 3d model only works if everything around it is also well drawn and rendered. The schoolbus stands out because of how well drawn it looks compared to its surroundings. bleh. And yeah, they did not even bother flipping the school bus word.

[@Feanor1988bis]

Wouldn't she-hulk punching a regular human like that send him straight to a hospital if not outright kill him? Aside from the fact that she has just assaulted a guy in court in front of a judge? And even then, how is marvel still not bankrupt publishing this stuff? This is not even fan fiction level!

[@prince_dogboy]

I can just picture the creators all high-fiving and making girl noises upon completion of it.

[@davidhill2275]

That was bad. I didn't even get a Bingo out of it! Thank you for reading it so I don't have to!

[@InfamyOrDeath-__-]

Hahaha your southern accent is brilliant.

[@donaldwright8567]

I can't even wrap my head around how this, apparently, class-action lawsuit against completely different heroes for completely different confrontations is even suppose to work. wouldn't they all be treated as different case? I think this framing device would work much better if She-Hulk was running between different court cases, defending different heroines from similar allegations. she could get steadily more frustrated about having to present the same defence as the accusations towards her clients get more and more outrageous with each case.

[@CooLin1stPlace]

*"What the hell is even that?!"*

[@HivisoftheScale]

New super-power, absobing the energy from showers..!

[@marcogenovesi8570]

the writers probably have an instant water heater with no buffer tank, so the moment power goes out you have no more hot water

[@pumpkinjoe99]

Thank you for your suffring . You're doing great work.

[@jeremiahwarden5959]

I can't decide what's worse. The artwork or the writing? It's like they're competing, but in reverse.

[@Martynde]

Bukowski caused Jen’s best friend to die in the very first She-Hulk issue in 1979. He deserves a punch, even after he apologised. He was a jerk back then too.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

Even if she-hulk is a weak form of hulk, a punch from her in hulk mode is still lethal to unprotected humans

[@thatHARVguy]

Apologising for them showering in a blackout in a room with no windows? I dunno.

[@hassathunter2464]

Evil man says bad things = EVIL Good She-Hulk USES VIOLENCE = GOOD These people got things all so backwards. Though I'm surprised these supervill... I mean heroes give the bad guy to the cops. Seeing this IS 2023 Marvel we're talking about...

[@Seedmember]

I felt like I was hearing "ohmahgahd so quirky" in every sentence. Must be a problem with the speakers... On a serious note, if this thing is written for girls around 10 years old, it misses any point that could make it interesting to them, in my humble opinion. If this is written for any other age group, I have no idea why it wasn't scrapped immediately.

[@CandyApples4ever]

I’ve never heard a man or boy say he wants to twerk in my life. That mentally hurt me, but I was already mentally hurting cuz of these comics, so can’t get any worse.

[@ophyjgjhnfn]

Why are they both drawn as teens doing selfies in the ice cream page when Monica should be at minimum twice Kamala’s age?

[@RatusMax]

This is going to sound strange, but I just can't help but think...Lifeguard hoodie? Before I say anything, I don't think it looks bad, or anything. I am just wondering why it exists. I sat here for like 5 minutes thinking. "Who swims when it's cold?" I live in the south it's unheard of. The only answer I could think of is "someone who lives in the north." Then I sat here thinking. "Where in the north" Since you don't have that Michigan type accent, we can eliminate the Midwest. It's either north east coast or north west coast. Some place with a lot of trees and in a suburb. I'd be surprised if you grew up in a huge city. Maybe 30-40 miles+ away from one. At the same time I can be dead wrong. Most of my knowledge comes from living in the south. Fun fact, I sat down and observed so much that I tried painting in 2020 and apparently, I was good at it. Now people won't think I am strange while I paint and observe. I was just some motionless person staring out into space before. The painting while sitting makes people think I am less strange. Rofl I loved that you caught that school bus being a flipped 3D model. Truth be told I thought comics were still hand drawn.

[@blvalverde]

Good fight? You're a hulk, he is a normal lawyer, that's not a fight. It's a easy beating

[@MrEmpireBuilder0000]

"let's add some millenial speak as much as we can in weird places!!! yeah!"

[@DoctorInk20]

These comic do something to my brain, wherein I spot so much wrong with them all at once. 😮‍💨 *Everything* is just _wrong._ I need a nap.

[@amazingfan15]

1:16 HOLY--Monica, what did they do to you? what's wrong with your face, woman?

[@ready2]

These writers have no idea how the world works and have no idea how to write believable characters. All they know is they need to push the agenda of men bad women good and women beat men easily. That's it. It is truly pathetic. I get second hand embarrassment and I'm not a woman.

[@BoomerZ.artist]

Lol, she died inside a little on this one.

[@stargazerlaurent6780]

Oh boy more sitcom writing

[@dennismason3740]

Water heaters run on electricity.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

water heaters usually have a large buffer tank of water that is kept hot so even without power you can still get hot water for a while. There are "instant" water heaters that don't have the buffer tank but they are less efficient

[@Giomancer]

This kind of writing is why writers are afraid of being replaced by AI.

[@rethablair6902]

New subscriber here😨

[@mikepette4422]

that...face.... NO MORE close ups !

[@drakependragon8439]

So she assaults a guy in the court room....yeah she would be going to jail.

[@GusC672]

Absolutely gorgeous

[@nunyabisnass1141]

*reads title* "Oh, i like female noises." *Reads comic.* "Not those ones...or those... damn it this is false advertisement!

[@فنكجَلِيدٍ]

That male lawyer is probably a trans-man. That's the only justification I have for him acting like a woman so much.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

that's more like a child

[@npc1386]

Are you related to Reviewbrah by chance?

[@ShoutOfCoffee]

Manga is a answer

[@LockeGran]

I'm too late to realize the trial is a men vs women trial the entire time and the men's lawyer is ridiculously childish to make Jen looks good. Ah, well, feminists wrote these so I shouldn't be surprised since "men bad, women powerful" is their only mantra after all.

[@coreymay918]

What bribe would you ask for to approve that comic without edits?

[@TroySpace]

Isn't Monica Rambeau a former fighter pilot? Why can't she install a dishwasher?

[@marcogenovesi8570]

because women want equality only in white collar jobs, anything with manual labor is for males

[@galacticmind9060]

Dannphan, is this video series a cry for help? Do you need the Suicide Hotline number? Please do not hurt yourself, this series has been torture. God less you.

[@marks7502]

BAM biff POW

[@burkeherrick3580]

I hate everything about these new characters, storylines and concepts. From both DC and Marvel its really turned me off to ever buying a comic book ever again.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

DC and Marvel aren't the only superhero comics in town, there are plenty of independents, for example ISOM comic

[@Ratface0007]

So glad I avoided Marvel and DC like the plague lmao These publishers are so overrated and nobody talks about Image or Dark Horse

[@shawnboahene5231]

Why do these guys never learn how courtrooms work? And why is a 30 yr old woman hanging out with a teenager

[@lifegood3322]

God! This writing is just so bad! 😭

[@fakshen1973]

The laziest writers and animators ever. Damn. Who green lights that junk?

[@knottheory79220]

Aren't you supposed to rewrite a story like 25 times before it's ready to be published?

[@willpower8061]

Are you sure Marvel isn't using a simple AI to write this crap?

[@ggrarl]

No, I've read a few AI generated stories, and they were actually fairly good. This is just the result of people who THINK they can write.

[@emmajade9507]

I haven’t seen part one yet ( just subscribed) but wow that was bad and the ending just didn’t make sense. She-Hulk just punched a human with *NO* super powers in the stomach, how isn’t he in the hospital? I don’t know much about She-Hulk other than she’s an lawyer, Bruce’s cousin and her show was just awful.

[@Dreadjaws]

This is driving me crazy. How is it possible that not even one of these stories is at least relatively decent, even by accident? They're all absolute garbage. They have to be doing it on purpose. This has to be some sort of money laundering scheme.

[@marcogenovesi8570]

the entire point these hacks got the gig was because of their vajejes, people that need to use the vajeje card to get a job are not good at the job

[@dormarch186]

Why do these people keep having she hulk assault people

[@kurioscomics]

Lefty women got nothing on Based female creators.

[@KyLewin]

Ugh. Awful as expected. It’s good to hear a woman say the same thing so I know the y-chromosome didn’t degrade my ability to appreciate the quality writing they have at Marvel. Thanks for the laugh, dannphan, it’s nice to hear someone mocking this junk.

[@zekken8227]

:)

[@residentantagonist5352]

I think that if you keep this up, you're gonna burn yourself out :-P Pace yourself, madame! I guess I did click the video... so I guess I'm enabling this self destructive behavior... CRIKEY! I'm part of the problem!