{YTP} ~ Why to Food

With Chef Jonathan Lonathan, CIO of Food.
JTF Source: www.mediafire.com/file_premiu...
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DaThings2: / dathings2
0:00 Intro/Overview
0:38 Avocados
0:55 Onions
1:15 Broccoli
1:35 Black Beans
1:45 Butternut Squash/Popeye's
2:00 ATG/Cantaloupe
2:15 Blueberries
2:54 Salmon
3:15 Food Safety (Problem 1)
3:42 Food Safety (Problem 2)
4:08 Food Safety (Problem 3)
4:20 Cleaning
4:51 Things to look out for
5:27 Credits
5:54 Post-Credits

[@DaThings]

bone apple tea ko-fi.com/elliespectacular

[@De19thKingJulion]

Bone Smash The Teeth De Leeches!

[@Vexcenot]

Does it food-bourne illness?

[@mirandahallisy97]

Boner apple teeth!

[@mirandahallisy97]

@DaThings I think you missed the part about guaccoli lol! 😜

[@bodinian]

Are you willing to create special request videos in this style for hire? I was thinking about having a channel for YTP, but I don't have the skill to make them.

[@C_Kiri]

Everyone always says 'How To Food', but nobody ever asks 'How IS Food'...

[@milkitea669]

If your taking advice from Chef Jonathan Lonathan, the answer is 'bad'

[@lemmingscanfly5]

People always ask how da food is tho...

[@lewdwig]

When are food? Yesn’t.

[@mirandahallisy97]

@@milkitea669 *sus

[@TheOnlyCaprisun]

Why is food?

[@milkitea669]

I didn't realize Chef Jonathan Lonathan was also skilled in post-modern poetry. Such a talented man.

[@livvy94]

It really makes you question the metanarrative of killing blueberries for nutrition, souos, and sus

[@blackravenX]

He has such a way with words!

[@LowLight420]

'If it grows, trade some blows'

[@ShadowTwister28]

Snarf Snarf Snarf

[@AveryTurner-ot9hx]

my fingernails are too short to snap my fingers dangit

[@mpk6664]

"Snarf snarf snarf." He has such a way with words. Truly the greatest poet of our time.

[@sergiowinter5383]

Certainly it represents the will of eating blueberries

[@Notorietypulp]

Remixing Limmy so that his character is actually correct about the weight is genius

[@jeremytitus9519]

Some days are really rough. You stand in the kitchen, spatula in one hand, George Forman grill in the other, shivering in your undergarments, and whisper: “Why should I even food?” DaThings has the answer. She always has the answer.

[@bloodymetalangel287]

DATHINGS IS A GIRL???

[@aarondavis8943]

So what you're saying is, DaThings has solved the meaning of life question, which literally makes her the greatest philosophical thinker in all of history. That's an immense achievement for a humble you tube pooper.

[@FriendlyKat]

She? Is that true? When did this happen?

[@sonicbhoc]

@@FriendlyKat at birth I assume

[@jimmyjohnjoejr]

@@sonicbhoc nope, pretty sure it's a dude who is just delusional. Would certainly explain the pfp

[@blackravenX]

As a Brit, I can confirm that we call that a Guacacado.

[@IceDragon289]

Do you also refer to broccoli as alligators?

[@Khrayfish]

Yup, since we don't have dinosaur lizards in the UK, the word goes unused, so we just use it as an alternative for broccoli.

[@blaizegottman4139]

@@Khrayfish I used to refer to broccoli as trees when I was a toddler

[@DynoSkrimisher]

Well, in Scotland we call it a Avacamole.

[@nevadatan7323]

I live south by the sea so we call fruit, reptiles, anything - heck you name it - fucking worthless.

[@ewoutro]

Things are gonna take a dark turn in the next instalment, "Who to Food"

[@generalrubbish9513]

Maybe the next one could be called "To Food or Not to Food"

[@mirandahallisy97]

@@generalrubbish9513 That'll probably be after all the who/what/where/when/why/how get used up.

[@abitofabitofabit4404]

Eat the MMMricher.

[@129140163]

Or “Whether to Food”

[@129140163]

@@generalrubbish9513 That is the question

[@ajdude9]

As an Englishman, I can confirm that Chef Jonathan Lonathan is correct about all the food names in England.

[@SuperFitzyBoi]

True. No meal in England is complete without some delicious fresh source of tears and jeers and joe.

[@st8113]

Steamed alligator just really hits the spot sometimes

[@SFTMKW]

all those millenials and their guacacado on toast

[@blackravenX]

I love how in each of these YTPs, Chef Johnathan Lonathan keeps getting demoted.

[@RoamingAdhocrat]

wait what? i'll have to rewatch

[@BulterMarkwad]

He was 'CEO of food' in where to food, then 'COO of food' in when to food, and now he is 'CIO of food'.

[@stapler942]

@@BulterMarkwad Does that mean he'll eventually be the CUO?

[@abitofabitofabit4404]

Threenagers do this

[@blaizegottman4139]

I Wonder what's the name of the original video

[@TonyBMan]

*That Blueberry poem was pure **-poetry-** gold*

[@imveryangryitsnotbutter]

Pure poemtry

[@blaizegottman4139]

It sure was

[@seacucumber1773]

that blueberry poem was salmon

[@saagabragi6938]

Puretry

[@nehemiahsomers4141]

Snarf snarf snarf

[@ob2kenobi388]

I love this series so much that, every time I hand someone their food/drink at my job, I say "And there you go!" with Chef Jonathan Lonathan's inflection

[@cellina.starfire]

Omg, I love this. Beautiful.

[@ob2kenobi388]

@@cellina.starfire Thanks! You're not so bad, yourself! ;)

[@Tirgo69]

(getting ice out of the machine) "Cute little cubes..."

[@atshorlus]

"Oh! it's food"

[@toiletjocky]

"If it grows, trade some blows" sent me. Amazing work as always.

[@ThomasG_]

The "mmm richer" at 1:13 was brilliant

[@9thDallasMowerExpo]

I knew about the tears and jeers, but I had forgotten onions are a source of Joe. Thanks for the reminder, Dathings.

[@pareidolist]

I've been running out of Joe, so I appreciated the reminder

[@ShortyLongstrokin]

"Bok, bok, bok. I'm just a little chicken!" Ha ha ha... What a story, Mark.

[@AHealthySnack]

"If it grows, trade some blows" this has inspired me to grow a garden so I can throw hands with whatever starts growing

[@alexdacat4026]

"And beware of Mike, because Mike may lie" I know that, thanks... *distant sounds of voice clips and glitched laughter*

[@RaysonWilliams]

HOLY $&#@ IS THAT A [heart shaped object] [funny moments prt 1]???

[@alexdacat4026]

@@RaysonWilliams YES, IT IS OL' PAL SPAMTON [[Reference Point]]. EVEN THOUGH 1T Did n"T [[Age 3+]] WELL I STILL THINK THIS [Comedy Relief] WAS GOOD 3NOUGH IN [[It's Times]] TO STAY

[@Turner_Strait]

I truly never want these to end. Also the little sting slightly rising in pitch each time is something I've been waiting for with these, lol

[@hansonel]

"Throw the food into the garbage can.... now." Johnathon Lonathon's poem about blueberries is genius.

[@corvuscorax7451]

Amazing inclusion of the Garfield glass that had lead in it... no wonder that guy got sick! It's the little details like that which really elevate your YTPs from funny to sheer genius.

[@TheEepyMagi]

Robbydude died from eating lead oh no!!!

[@dzanderallison]

It's the little D, cloggle cloggle cloggle

[@IanZWhite00]

I like how I’ve seen this guy so much now but I still only know him as “Chef Johnothan Lohnothan”

[@Ms_FluffySheep]

I loved that poem about blueberries. I feel the same way about them.

[@GetProphetic]

Who doesn't

[@bodhiston5550]

Thank you Johnathan Lonathan. I hope more people in the world are as scared of plain yogurt as I am.

[@ZephanyZephZeph]

"Cultivated for over 9 thousands years" I know this is an "over nine thousand!" Meme but now I can't help but think of a broccoli cultivation novel. Young Master Broccoli

[@dragons_hook]

Especially considering that having a red crown is a characteristic of a super broccoli god super broccoli!

[@ZephanyZephZeph]

@@dragons_hook Found the God-tier Broccoli cultivation novel in the bin

[@GalakStari]

2:07 “He asked politely, saying please and thank you because he wasn’t a tool.” It’s good to know that Alexander the Great showed such good manners. Thanks DaThings!

[@TyGuy9001]

This sentence mixing is just too good omg. That Arlo Reference made me double take too lol.

[@squipples369]

2:45 the way the "green" is stretched gives you just enough time to wonder if this joke is going to be a list of something other than colorful berries, and when it is just that, the slight hitch makes it all the funnier.

[@baitzadasuto]

I think every Johnathan Lonathan YTP just keeps getting better, no matter how much I love the last one

[@Randomizer903]

It's been a long time since a YTP has done something to make me have a hard time composing myself. That Limmy bit was sublime!

[@ChrisGuerra31]

4:45 oh no 😮

[@E3kHatena]

Johnathan Lonathan has really undergone a lot of character development lately. With his recent anti-food crusade, how much longer can he be the CIO of food?

[@underlinedcg1574]

2:54 Kermit: lul so random

[@enlongjones2394]

2:40 You foof! I am a blueberrio master! Allow me to reunite you with your ants!

[@TheNewOrchestra]

**gasp** ORBY! I REMEMBER YOU! WHERE'VE YA BEEN, BUDDY?

[@funktimusrhyme]

Remember your training, do not be distracted or discuss the incident with anyone

[@TheNewOrchestra]

@@funktimusrhyme Oh fuck!

[@BrettSonicBluBlumfieldVideos]

I lost it at the Blueberries poem! LOL

[@GetProphetic]

Snarf snarf snarf

[@habibibror7357]

My main problem when cleaning my kitchen is ALWAYS to take care of my little bacteria friends too, glad to hear other people have the same issue. EDIT: 0:37-0:39 FRE SHA VA CA DO

[@kaden-sd6vb]

Gotta make sure to avoid Sauce-contamination

[@habibibror7357]

@@kaden-sd6vb Exactly! What a mess that'd be

[@MoeNinjaCat]

Chef Jonathan Lonathan got me through a lot really hard times when I was younger and hearing his poetry after all these year. Its got me all emotional again. Man had a real talent and gift, shame about the accident :

[@unabatedbasher]

Blueberries, blueberries Snarf snarf snarf Cold, cold blueberries In one ordinary scarf Over that frozen harbor, blueberries falling from the sky Kill, kill, blueberries You can make sure they all die Truely the found poem of the century

[@kalimaude3532]

On a regular checkin with Chef Lonathan. Apparently, during my last food remedial, I missed the last bullet point at 3:31. And I just wanna reflect, for a moment, on the accumulated canon of DaThings humor. Particularly the portmanteau. She uses them not as a direct attack of a joke, but rather as a sort of supporting assault, a regular staccato burst of them throughout. There and already gone before your brain has time to process them fully, such that you are halfway into a smile already when the next main punchline hits. I have always admired this. What I didn't realize is that this has trained my brain. Conditioned me, to anticipate these. So having one occur at the usual place, but subverting the format into pure text, was like waiting for me to get complacent and then sucker-punching me in the funnybone. I had to lunge for the pause button and nearly choked on my ugly-snorting laughter. "Threenagers." You are so goddamn good at this, Ellie.

[@davidklop5779]

I love how the CDI sources live on in our hearts and in references.

[@ieatgarbage8771]

0:39 this joke allowed me to laugh

[@AugustBreak]

One of my favorite jokes you do is take a single letter sound from one word and splice it into a sentence where that letter sound happens. I don’t know why it cracks me up every time

[@Circuitssmith]

I was wheezing from the thumbnail alone. Mr. Lonathan’s broccoli fixation catches you off guard.

[@rodguy35]

1:33 Over 9k joke for the oldheads, didn’t even use the clip we just knew

[@schniemand]

there's an extra gap between 2 letters in "vegetables"

[@NovaStella_]

I missed seeing our good friend Johnathan Har Johnathan Lonathan. I hope he keeps himself safe in the war against food. They say they're never the same after the trenches.

[@Uberwenis]

Another great chapter in the chronicles of Johnathan Lonathan Edit: The... Chronathans Lonathans?

[@spiritwarhol707]

That poem brought a tear to my eye.

[@Skott_Kennedy]

3:02 LMAO Limmy

[@naughtypanda4891]

The Robby touching had me cackling

[@LakeFX]

Holy sauce, Ellie never disappoints!

[@raidenvakarian9362]

The "cantaloupe" joke would not have been funny in any other context. I saw it coming a mile away and it was delivered in the only surprising (and funny way) it could. I am kind of in awe here. This was brilliant.

[@theonlycatonice]

"A freakin chicken" 🤣😂 "Most moms will do that for you"

[@RT-qd8yl]

I've always been curious, on average how much time goes into making each minute of something like this? I can't imagine it would go very quickly! Thank you for the time and effort you put in to make us smile. Personally the Jonathan Lonathan videos are my favorite out of everything you've done.

[@cheetosugar695]

this was great and I'm glad nothing scary happened at the end

[@ProjectSNT]

Oh good! I was looking to add more sosphorus in my diet!

[@PissBoys]

“Just sploop it on out” is now a permanent part of my lexicon, so thanks.

[@MrFiekie123]

I mean, it is a kitchenicle term, so you kind of have to use it

[@LiamMazeika]

Every Skyline Chili joke you make, I become more powerful. Thank you for feeding me

[@atlas2903]

Your editing is on another level. I can't imagine having the patience to pull off these masterpieces.

[@JasonMartin327]

I seriously can't thank you enough for creating this insane journey detailing one man's descent into madness.

[@bluerazzfox]

You are honestly probably the best YTP creator on KZbin. Every single video makes me laugh. Thank you.

[@Michael_______]

Been putting these off till I feel better. I'll watch anyway. Thanks for what you do.

[@TheCandyManCanToday]

This YTP series is genuinely my favourite YTP series ever made. A mixture of great base material and your talents.

[@TheGreatsagegoku]

I say this every time but this is your best one since the last one! I love all the jokes in the text edits on screen, and I really appreciate the subtitles. I tend to process audio slowly but text I can read a little faster. Love this YTP.

[@ajkcool]

This series is a look into Jonathan Lonathan's mind as he slowly turns from being a chef and enjoying food, to slowly hating and wanting to destroy it...

[@jeffreywilliams3403]

So very pumped to see Limmy make a cameo. You’re not going the wrong way down a one way street with your content, that’s for sure!

[@x.zi.404]

i love how we can see you were having fun when you made it, it really makes me happy to see the creativity also i just love the food series

[@pyrazine]

congratulations to chef jonathan lonathan on his meteoric rise from CEO to COO to CIO of food!

[@godofdead2]

One of your better works by far. I'm in tears.

[@TeddyOG]

"bad is not good" Very insightful Jon

[@CaptainCJ97]

I'll never get tired of your work

[@the1gip]

Excellent as always. Absolutely love Chef Jonathan Lonathan.

[@targaghjj]

I think this is your best yet!

[@Yourname942]

Man I love your work/humor YTP done right

[@foxboi6309]

2:20 This is the best poem I've heard in years

[@marvinkazhe]

2:10 had my ribs hurting🤣

[@TheBanana93]

I haven't seen a YTP in a long time and god damn that was beautiful! Bravo.

[@kaukospots]

the limmy bit got me real good

[@simoncantwell9256]

You know, I get very excited at my phone telling me of the next Jonathan Lonathan video

[@vaughnkopacz2196]

these are too funny! luv how the little music parts keep upping on the tempo. LOL!-the poem on blueberries LOL.

[@nicodemos4829]

40 pounds is heavier than 2 pounds. Oh not you and all.

[@Stipopedia]

This is one of my favorite YTP of all time

[@lungse.2565]

Thank you so much for subtitles you are light years ahead of us

[@WhimsicalLittledawg]

This is EXTRAORDINARILY excellent!

[@RepostCollection]

It's hard to find good ytps these days This channel is what we've all needed

[@kaffein7955]

Oh damn just as i finished the previous videos this comes out, thanks for thr continuity :D

[@RACaptialRegion]

I don't know why but the speeding up music and utter absurdity of the content on these slides had me cracking up and going back multiple times to see what the hell I was supposed to be reading 😂

[@isitleeyourelookingfor6352]

I can't explain the ridiculous amount of joy I feel when a new part is added to my favorite YTP series......It's silly, but it just gets me so hyped lol

[@robinkopanka2473]

Love your YTP's ❤

[@losiglowful]

This made my day. Excellent work 😂

[@oboll6064]

4:51 Others when you are trying to lose weight but struggle to stay on a diet way too much to the point where it annoys them

[@NoodleCollie]

"I'm just a little chicken" absolutely sent me

[@trulyinfamous]

This is a wonderful YTP. It's quite tame and funny without being an assault on your senses. Sometimes you don't want your brain imploded by a KZbin poop.

[@danielstill6150]

Thank you for the Arlo reference, that made my day

[@Samueldonovan2007]

0:46 I don’t know why I knew this was coming, but I did

[@snowcraft40]

Every single Video Ellie makes has me in bits. Thanks bud, keep up the good work.

[@McBehrer]

1:20 ish I love the repeated replacement of I with just, OTHER I sounds from the same sentence, so it still sounds basically the same, for no real reason

[@Rainok]

It's my favorite part too Also it's not just other I sounds, it's the first I sound repeated

[@Veroxzes]

This was the best YTP I’ve seen in a while 🤣

[@anomaliecosmos]

"Way to prevent food-borne illness, everyone!" Stop, stop, I'm already deeeeeaaaaddd

[@McBehrer]

1:45 I see you, Arlo. You can't escape from me!