Dating, Marriage, and Sex Advice (Valentine's Day Special) w/ Cameron Fradd

Matt and Cameron take questions from locals supporters on dating, marriage and sex. Thrsdy gets very uncomfy.
@cfradd on KZbin
Cameron's Patreon: / amongthelilies
Chapters:
0:00 Intro
2:00 How to approach Catholic Dating
4:17 Matt and Cameron's first Kiss
16:13 Spanking?
22:03 Dating with wounds
25:22 How long should you date?
27:55 The Marital Embrace
38:28 Break
41:42 Discerning while Dating
49:00 Matt Proposing
51:00 Beginning of Dating
57:00 Catholic Match
1:01:25 Conflict in Marriage
1:08:46 Homeschooling
1:13:40 Picking a community
1:18:16 Return of the Duck question
1:19:30 Wrap Up
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[@PintsWithAquinas]

🚨 Get exclusive content by supporting me on Locals: mattfradd.locals.com/support

[@mattnieri1202]

Cameron should try one of those triangular wedge pillows, if she hasn't. Helps a lot on nights when the stomach keeps you up.

[@memymomalex]

I paid $30 to use Catholic Match for one month and connected with my husband, and then cancelled, lol. $30 for a husband wasn't bad.

[@carlac33]

LOL. I met hubby on there too. He joined to message me but I had been on there for over a year. 😏 Was in my 20s and creeped out by some of the 40ish guys messaging tho

[@YiriUbic3793]

@@carlac33 Men are men not matter what and everybody who call themself catholics doesn't mean they live a catholic life, some people who call themself catholic are only cultural catholics

[@marypassalacqua2490]

That’s how me and my husband met! We had both just joined and found each other.

[@guadalupano1531]

Glad for you. I have heard horror stories from women who used it and had guys mark that they believed in Catholic teachings like abstaining from sex before marriage then act the opposite. One guy was flirting with Orthodoxy. 😅

[@theradioattheendoftheworld4251]

My wife would probably say you overpaid LOL

[@EdwardGraveline]

I write a poem for my wife of 44 years. I do a poem for her for Christmas, her birthday, Valentine's Day, and our Anniversary in August Have done four a year for 43 years

[@stacielara9856]

This is the sweetest thing ever. ❤

[@csongorarpad4670]

God bless your marriage!

[@dargosian]

If I tried that, she'd get a total of two poems before she'd cancel the relationship for good.

[@dsonyay]

I can only write poems that begin with roses are red, violets are blue

[@livinginthelight333]

I just got out of a 3 year relationship with a man I lived with for 2.5 years. Now he’s living with his new gf and I’m single and alone and have learned a huge lesson. Don’t live with your bf/gf just to see if it’ll work out. It won’t. Now I’m trying to get back into my faith and find a man who will love me enough to wait till marriage. I’m 44 and have had enough of the BS of the world’s version of relationships.

[@PintsWithAquinas]

God bless you, you beautiful woman. Remember, every saint has a past and ever sinner has a future.

[@livinginthelight333]

@@PintsWithAquinas thank you so much

[@livinginthelight333]

@@PintsWithAquinas for Cameron, I have the same issues with reflux and acid since starting a new diet. I tried a teaspoon of baking soda in 8 oz of hot water, a squeeze of half a lemon and a pinch of stevia for flavour and I’ve been cured. No more problems.

[@martinarooney6102]

Pray to Our Lord and lean on Him. I wish I had had my faith when I got married then divorced but I didn't. Knowing Our Lord Jesus now after He blessed me with His Spirit, now I offer every tear to Him for His great use. Alone we can do nothing, with Him, He can do everything. Rejoice dear, and don't worry about this life, another awaits in His kingdom. If you feel sad, pm me or chat in here or CA Live, am not a theripist just a simple catholic child of God who is learning of His wonders every day, Hugs.

[@strongjohn7078]

Patients my dear. God will bring someone in your life one of these days🙏

[@LordSenechal]

This is so wholesome and made me laugh a lot. I can’t wait to get married in October! Pray for me! Cheers

[@almacarminaa]

Congratulations! Prayers for you and your future spouse!

[@AJanae.]

Oh congrats!!! I got married last January… it’s a day you’ll always remember.. so very special and it only gets better ♥️♥️♥️

[@cfradd]

congratulations!!

[@sleeplesshead602]

Congratulations! Praying happiness for both of you 💖

[@matthewcunningham5382]

That's awesome! I'm getting married in October as well so please pray for me and my future spouse as I pray for you and your future spouse as well

[@kurzantema]

Please do a homeschooling episode with Cameron and questions from the audience. It's do great to see you two together

[@gentlecatholic]

Yes please!

[@kurzantema]

Cameron just made a video on her channel called: Unschooling is not as crazy as I thought :)

[@marievayda7527]

I met my husband end of May he asked me to marry him in August we were married in 13 months. We will be celebrating our 50th this year. I would do it over and over again.

[@theresefrancis9283]

My husband and I dated and got married within a year. It's totally worth it. Once you've discerned...why wait? I get wanting "money" and "stability", but you can build that faster together than apart and waiting a really long time can actually be imprudent.

[@AJanae.]

Yes! My husband and I waited so long to get married out of money and stability reasons and once we married we say “we should’ve got married sooner” !

[@Jack-hd1zn]

Once you reach your 30s and the cares and concerns that plague people in their 20's are gone, dating is so much easier its silly!! Lol

[@Thagomizer]

Yes, but "together and unmarried" in my state means all of that plus free health insurance from Medicaid.

[@lothara.schmal5092]

@@Thagomizer Your immortal soul>free healthcare imo

[@Jack-hd1zn]

I met my wife on a secular dating app but with filters for only Catholic women. We met (we were not friends first, this is key.) We went on our first date, became exclusive, got engaged and married inside of 15 months. And my biggest take away is: all the advice given by chastity speakers and "purity culture" was either not helpful or wasn't true. And before anyone asks, me and my wife did save the marital embrace for marriage and lived out the church's call to faithful couples to the letter. And even so: - We didn't save our first kiss for the altar. - We weren't friends first. - We didn't meet through the church or a catholic dating site. - We didn't let our expectations cripple our relationship when we found a flaw in the other. Point is, Catholics are shooting themselves in the foot by buying all these weird pieces of advice with no grounding in scripture or tradition but that are born from a spirit of brokenness and desire to not get hurt again. But if you want to love, if you want to know the thrill of a beautiful, Christ-centered relationship, you have to put down the book or podcast or whatever, and take the risk to love with abandon and joy 😊

[@Abigail-ly7fr]

this is so beautiful and can be true for so many people! I know I've experienced bits of what you're saying here in my relationship (engaged to be married later this year!) - but I went through a serious episode of fear and anxiety (not from God) when I heard some of the things these chastity speakers were saying. Not to say what they preach isn't good! But sometimes they make sweeping generalizations that can hurt rather than enrich a relationship you're in. Trust in God, love much. If both people are desiring holiness and bring the best to the table each day, with the understanding that we are all human and will always fall but will strive for perfection... that is beautiful.

[@Jack-hd1zn]

@Abigail Congrats on the Engagement, Abigail! Be assured of my prayers for you and your future husband!! Yeah and admittedly, some of the more "radical" chastity speakers aren't even Catholic, many are evangelical or Mormon actually. But a lot of these ideas catch fire and become THE only way to go about being chaste and its just not true.

[@Abigail-ly7fr]

@@Jack-hd1zn thank you very much! And I agree! We're all broken people and some of us are blessed to find another person who's just broken, yet striving to be better. Sainthood is a journey!

[@laurenfluder537]

My husband and I met on Catholic Match, both with the intention of meeting our spouse and discerning marriage. I'd definitely say we were 'friends' first. We lived 1,000miles apart and didn't have much ability to meet initially, but the friendship was strong, the conversation flowing and we loved talking. He's still my best friend, I am really grateful to be married to my best friend.

[@Jack-hd1zn]

@Lauren Fluder That's beautiful and I'm so overjoyed for your Faith-Filled love story! My wife is, and always will be, my best friend. She wasn't my friend before we became an exclusive, official couple dating and discerning marriage. Other couples are friends first and their marriages are as strong and lovely as those who go on a date before being friends. Again, my point is saying one path is better or "more prudent/pure" isn't fair and does a disservice to those who don't do it the way a Chastity Book says to.

[@IS-kf4nr]

Excellent episode! To the Catholic Match point: one of the reasons why you have to pay is to weed out the creepy people who are on there for the wrong reasons. If you're paying for something there is less of a chance that you are on there for ulterior motives. That's also why they don't let you send social media handles, etc, without paying. You both are such a wonderful couple and what you said about basically, "not deciding is deciding" really struck a chord with me. Again, great job!

[@livinginthelight333]

I’ve paid and have met a few creeps on that site unfortunately.

[@nickproulx6650]

Can’t wait - these episodes with Cameron are the best!

[@saraymsantos]

100% Agree!!!!!!!

[@danielfeliciano9840]

10/10!!

[@crose7974]

Agreed!!

[@victoriadiaz6710]

I totally agree. I’m with these videos with her for days

[@cfradd]

Oh shucks! Thanks!!

[@anzot6903]

Regarding dating/engagement length, certain personality disorders usually can be hidden for about six months before the facade becomes too much to maintain in a given relationship, so I generally advise friends to at least date that long. There are exceptions, of course. It's just one of those things to be cautious about. (Worked in a Tribunal. Saw lots of dysfunctional marriages and reason for breakdown.)

[@Ste.Germaine]

I agree! And I would say ideally date for a year and meet each other’s family of origin.

[@sitka49]

I agree I always thought a year was a good bench mark.

[@byzantinebeauty]

This is why I have that time parameter in dating because I have bpd. Albeit, i inform new partners and make active efforts to not allow it to be an issue in how I treat men

[@dylanrunner2001]

In my experience, there aren't enough people on Catholic Chemistry and Catholic Match. Chances are that your results for compatible suitors that you're interested in will be slim

[@henrysharpe9976]

I don't think I've ever had so many laughs in one sitting as this episode got from me!! On a more serious note: In hearing two people in love, I can see the love of God in a different way. Thank you! May the Good Lord bless you and your family!

[@lmnop01]

That second note, so true!

[@viviennedunbar3374]

If you got married within 12 months ( or within 2 years) of meeting and are still married sign in here. Met my husband and we were friends for a few months, we started dating and within 3 weeks he asked me to marry him (we had been hanging out a lot as friends first). We met in April, started dating in July and were married by the next June. Happily married 26 yrs.

[@timrichardson4018]

"Since discernment has become fashionable, no one has made a decision since." Wow! That rings true. It's hyperbolic, but there's definitely truth in it. Discern. Exercise wisdom. Seek council. Make sure there aren't red flags you're ignoring. But at some point, you have to decide, commit, and jump in with both feet.

[@TheJmlew11]

Discerned out of seminary last summer (was in for 5 years) and I must say that the Catholic dating scene is pretty tough to navigate.

[@sebastienzarate9408]

It hardly even exists to be honest.

[@cfdcany]

Hang in there, brother. You'll find your woman.

[@Ste.Germaine]

I will pray for you! Find any Catholic young adult groups you can. Go to daily Mass at larger parishes. ❤

[@TheJmlew11]

@@cfdcany thanks for the encouragement!!

[@TheJmlew11]

@@Ste.Germaine thanks for your prayers! I have been, though surprisingly the population is overwhelming male. Those few single women seem to be comfortable being single.

[@aadamy]

This was such a treat. Thank you!

[@veronicapagan4520]

This was my favorite ! Great job!

[@marek431]

That was a great conversation! Thanks guys. ❤

[@abigailsullivan3078]

I feel like I’m just watching my parents express their love and it makes me so emotionally happy for you guys!!!

[@PopCultureCatechism]

Thanks for sharing so vulnerably. It’s not easy to be vulnerable and open on the internet.

[@PipeDreamerJacques]

This was an EXCELLENT episode. Thank you for being so honest in all these topics. I’ve shared this with my wife and I hope she listens.

[@18Tonks]

Literally watching this as my Valentine evening activity and it’s fabulous 😂

[@angrypotato_fz]

1:05:20 A beautiful piece of advice! I never head it before, but it makes a lot of sense. It's better to speak with friends who try to understand the spouse and explain his/her behaviour than getting even more winded up and grow the anger and misunderstandings (even though the later is easier and might be relaxing a bit, but is harmful in a long way) Also great that you pointed out how pitiful it is to complain about the spouse to other people (in a mocking way, not a loving, vulnerable and respectful way).

[@TheTrump]

I love that you two did this. Such a great show and it's amazing how well you to communicate. ❤

[@IlluminosaImmortalis]

It's so nice to hear stories like my own! My husband and I got married after knowing each other nine months when his parents were losing their mind with how FAST it all was. I'm so glad we got married when we did. It was the best decision and we're so blessed.

[@jenniferrogoff8459]

I love watching the 2 of you together! I think you are a great witness in that super realistic genuine way!! God bless you!!!

[@JM-ms7wk]

This is on top of my favourite episodes this year!!! Cheers 🍻 guys!!!

[@benbing3926]

This is so beautiful. Thank you two for sharing so much and being so open: your stories and advice are so inspiring. May God Bless your marriage and family.

[@oxanalim8819]

This was wonderful 😊

[@livymarie3573]

Happy Valentine's Day, Matt and Cameron! It's so life-giving to see such a beautiful couple such as yourselves. I can't wait to watch this after I finish classes today. Just had to hop on here and tell you that I love you, both! In Christ, Liv

[@CFLeonor]

This was great! God bless your family

[@ArlinAmelia]

I could listen to Matt and Cameron all day! Really enjoyed this episode, God bless you both and your families and thank you for being so honest and helpful with us all!

[@nicoleyoshihara4011]

Love both of your conversations ❤💕💯

[@ceciliaaguirre2962]

I love how much you all laugh together! 🥰

[@dentellier]

This is the sweetest convo ever. You guys are adorable. Makes me wish I were married.

[@Cj-ou8jq]

In all honesty Matt, you and your wife need to do this more! #JackieAndBobbyPart2

[@truegirl2anna]

Yayyyy!! Cameron!! Love it whenever these two hangout together on the show 🥳🥳🙏

[@cfradd]

Hahaha Thanks!

[@thebaremumma8739]

Just watching this - January 2024. This IS SO GOOD. I did NET Canada year ago and all the names you are mentioning are all so familiar. I just love hearing your story. It reminds me of my own. So wholesome. So good. Thank you for sharing.

[@FreedomandBaconHomestead]

"Matt.exe stopped working" made me LOL in real life. Great conversation and God bless you all!

[@MrJDadBlack]

Great episode!!! I thank you both for sharing your experiences with us on the ether! I pray our Immaculate Lady, the blessed Virgin Mary, will bless your family with many uplifting and wonderful Graces very soon! My wife and I have so many very similar stories as you guys; married 18 years and we were 22 and 21 years old, I got home from a year in Iraq in 2004 and we married 7 months later! I converted when we were pregnant with our first child, and dealt with (still dealing with them) the same fears Matt mentions… *sigh* I received a lot of positive take always and found myself feeling very comforted listening to other Catholic married couples share their struggles and joys. Thanks again Fradd’s!!

[@CatholicWithaBiblePodcast]

Your chats with you wive are delightful and I think most people would be cool seeing even of this. Embrace that convenience.

[@AG-kr1my]

This was lovely and hilarious 💖

[@tired_eyes49]

Super excited! I just finished watching you and Cameron’s podcast on chronic pain, and I cannot WAIT for this one!

[@PintsWithAquinas]

Awesome! Thank you!

[@FreedomandBaconHomestead]

@@PintsWithAquinas That conversation was excellent and I shared it with a friend who has chronic pain who appreciated the conversation, too!

[@josephdemary4048]

Yo, this is de Maris from Brian's server. Can't believe I found you here lol.

[@cfradd]

@@FreedomandBaconHomestead hope it helped!

[@tired_eyes49]

@@josephdemary4048 haha whoa!

[@agnesfaifua5617]

Love this!!😅😅🥰Gorgeous, hilarious, sincere!! Keep on keeping it real!🥰❤️‍🔥🙏

[@7uhv]

The raw honesty is awesome and hilarious , God bless Thursday,l luv him perfect addition.

[@Karlaestefaniar]

I really love how realistic you are about these very normal things, Gos bless your marriage and family always ❤

[@anaclararodas4833]

Hey Matt and Cameron, I'm from Guatemala and hope you enjoyed your stay here! If you ever get the chance again I recommend you coming for Holy Week, the processions are amazing 💯

[@SherooDeen]

This episode was great! Thanks for the great content and laughs. My wife and I had our first kiss and it was so awkward that we sort of repress it from our memories.

[@katerinajoan257]

Watching you both laugh about your children was the best part of this episode ❤😅

[@noahhastings6145]

Cameron is the best guest

[@shaynasmits3551]

The plug of Steubenville is electric, especially at the end I laughed out loud. love y'all's podcast especially when Cameron is on!

[@patty378]

We need all the parenting advice!!! 3 kids 5 and under here and strong fertility -- I am scared of getting pregnant again lol and then getting too intense with my oldest when dealing with pregnancy challenges and postpartum and even just that whole first year with a baby is tough.

[@patty378]

"Our wounds are rubbing up against each other" is the best line...also Matt your vulnerability is heart-warming and touching. Thank you deeply for sharing that with us so that we can receive your vulnerability and gift it to our families as well.

[@alonsoACR]

Look into natural family planning (NFP)!

[@mimi_j]

I looove these interviews with his wife 😂😂😂

[@Apologeticocatolicos]

Finally made it to a live video 🙌🏽 haha God bless!!

[@shishsquared]

Pretty sure these are pre-recorded, what you saw was the premiere, basically a release watch party

[@eomerofrohan4399]

I genuinely really enjoy Thursday on the show. He counterbalances Matt's grumpy old man energy

[@PepiNo-jt3zd]

This was actually a beautiful episode, Cameron is radiant!! I stopped watching/listening to your show a while ago, and it seems I came back to check it at the right time. I needed to hear some of these things- Thanks for this little interview with your lovely wife, she seems so grounded and strong, things I aspire to be. Pray for me as I prepare myself to go into this dating thing, after being in a really long relationship that I thought would lead to marriage, feeling kinda lost right now!! The catholic environment I am in is full of beautiful people but none of them close to my age, so it's hard to find anyone to walk these paths with. Also Thursday seems like a hilarious guy too :) Good episode

[@PalinaZ]

How is it going? (:

[@victorialozano7033]

I just love Cameron so much

[@wordsbyruthie]

Beautiful beautiful.... Really helpful❤

[@paulcollins8695]

I enjoy this show--first time

[@CoatesPower]

You two are adorable! ❤

[@alexrolande]

On parenting I can’t recommend Lisa and Greg Popcak enough! Their book Parenting with Grace was life changing for me… definitely a couple I’d love to see @pints have on!!

[@thecathbrig]

Great episode. However, I find that Thursday's interjections and rants take away from the awesome interaction between Matt and Cameron.

[@Mobuku]

Tbh, if you think about it particularly in the context of history, $30 for Catholic Match isn't too bad compared to how much people paid in the past to find a spouse, e.g. dowries, mail-order brides, etc. Not just in the past too, but even some countries still do that with arranged marriages. They probably cost more than $30, so $30 isn't too bad.

[@martinarooney6102]

Brilliant! You two together give so much fruit! More please! Matt, we need your wife's voice more with your beautiful thoughts too with her. Treasure your moments together, she is God's and He might be missing her, dive deep in her and Him and flourish both of you, peace and blessings to you both and may God protect you and your family.

[@somethinggtwo]

Oh man I really enjoyed this, cackled a few times through it

[@breemarierooney3011]

YOU GUYS ARE ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE 😍

[@isap01]

Wait you’re coming to Guatemala?! What for? That’s amazing! Loyal Catholic Guatemalan subscriber here 🙋‍♀️ I would love to know if you’re doing a speaking event or something of the sort so I can attend. Or if there’s any way you could do an event at my college. Sending lots of love and support! 🇬🇹🇬🇹🤍🤍

[@jeremysmith7176]

Given Matt spoke of just getting back from SEEK which was early January at the beginning of the video and recording so they have a buffer of content, it is quite likely they have already finished their Guatemala trip.

[@chirpyfernandes9866]

I actually met my husband at Catholic Match 😂 we both love the website as it really help us finding someone from the same faith..

[@hannahnichole7032]

Hey Thursday!!!!!

[@johnpaulroboski6577]

Dude this was hilarious. Great episode.

[@JimiReader]

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! :)

[@terirusnak9675]

Catholic Match is far from perfect. But it is one way of allowing God to work in your life and lead you to your vocation. I was on CM for FIFTEEN YEARS! I have no idea how much money I spent on subscriptions collectively over the years. Bad date, after (really) bad date. Then one day, a day before my subscription expired, my now-husband messaged me. We dated for 6 months, were engaged for the next 6, and now we are married. Those 15 years were awful, but the end result was worth it. You never know when God will step in and say, “Ok, now!” ❤️

[@cdeep4548]

I’ve been single for almost a year now. It took some time to get used to being single but I have to say I actually prefer it now. I have found it difficult to navigate dating in the Bay Area to say the least 😒. But if for some miracle I happen to get to meet someone, I hope my faith doesn’t get compromised with sin of impurity.

[@heliopijpe]

Awesome !! Laughs and insightful! XD

[@arkansas99]

27:55 Hearing my name but knowing I didn’t submit a question😂 Good question though, Noah!

[@merseabless8305]

Love Cameron and Matt

[@mrscream2028]

Wholesome content

[@mrscream2028]

Matt’s got balls of steel bringing his wife on the show 😅

[@jeremysmith7176]

1:16:40 Thursday this advert for Stubenville needs to be clipped and uploaded as a short

[@andya7012]

Currently engaged and I feel what Matt was saying about the fear of not being a good husband real hard right now! Must be normal lol

[@alejandracasey4482]

I love this episode. You two are great together 🎉❤. I joined Catholicchemistry after Matt Fradd pitched it on his show. Paid the monthly fee. I got so many fake account users hitting on me. I closed my account after two months. 😢

[@jadealexander8233]

We love a good love story🥰

[@Cj-ou8jq]

1:18:06 YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH POP!! YOU TALKIN BOUT MY WORK HOME PAPA?!?!

[@johnseow507]

Hi Matt, may I ask if you don't mind sharing, what made you decide marriage over priesthood?:)) And btw, thank you so much for this and God bless both of you!!!:)) Thank you for all the work you do and for cooperating with Grace to bless the world with your love for Him and His ppl!!:)) Will be praying for your wonderful family:))

[@userone297]

When is Thursday making his own podcast?

[@markkristynichols845]

I LOVED this😂😂😂 Married 32 years July ‘24 and cannot tell our first date for our boys (27&25) YET😂😂😂

[@Seethi_C]

The problem with Catholic Match isn’t the money. I paid for the full subscription and sent out hundreds of messages. Only got 2 dates out of it. They have to make money, so I don’t fault them. The biggest problem is that there is an imbalance between the number of men and women on the site.

[@NaruIchiLuffy]

More of which?

[@Seethi_C]

@@NaruIchiLuffy Much more men than women, as is true on all dating apps

[@danstrikker6465]

Welcome to modern dating. It sucks

[@lizr6313]

I wanted to see the pic of you guys as newlyweds

[@bethanyb2244]

I got something on Catholic Match for Thursday lol. I saw a post on a very traditional homeschooling Catholic moms Instagram about a work from home job for a Catholic company, turned out to be Catholic Match for a customer service position. I believe she does this same job part time from home with a bunch of kids. Awesome, I was interested. She connected me with someone who turned out to be one of the founders of the site and I had a video interview with him. We got to the part about the hours and schedule of the position and it turns out Sundays were required (I was quite surprised this mom would have advertised such a job with how traditional she is but turns out she didn’t know this was a requirement and she doesn’t work on Sundays which is why she didn’t give me this info originally). So the interview ended there because he had no intention of budging from this requirement. And I refuse to sin (plenty of other companies I could work for not on Sundays if I need to do this is not necessary for me) or take precious time from my Sunday with my family and Mass at my parish to work and was appalled that a company calling itself Catholic would require this. I also don’t think customer service tickets are so essential they can’t wait until Monday. So there’s my tea on Catholic Match.

[@dulcemariatovar9744]

The ball and chain made me LOL Also: Where can I send you FAN MAIL! Thank you!

[@elizabellabethabell9003]

Do you think you could do an episode regarding the "marital debt?" That is, to what extent one is or is not obligated to engage sexually with one's spouse, and the complexities of the issue. Timothy Gordon just released a video on it in response to criticisms of his wife's book that talks about it, and I have to say, I found it shocking. I'm trying to educate myself more about it online, but frankly a lot of the people explaining it have a "trad" (the bad kind) way of talkng about it that brushes off all concerns with "well, too bad, do it anyway." It makes considerate love in matrimony sound optional, and from a young Catholic woman looking to marry, it's causing me some real anxiety. I'd love to have it explained in a thoughtful way. Love your show ❤️

[@eamonnclark7360]

There is a very long juridical and moral tradition on marital debt which Gordon seems not to want to try to tackle - or is not even aware of. Two really good summaries can be found in McHugh and Callan's excellent morals textbook (#2614-6), and Prummer's classic handbook (the 1 volume version - #860-1). You can easily find both texts online. Older authorities go into more details (like those St. Alphonsus works with as authorities), but they don't always agree with each other, and they are not translated, so it's not so simple. Best method: consider how serious the request is, consider how reasonable the request is given various circumstances, use common sense and charity to figure it out, with good communication, and lean toward giving when in doubt.

[@elizabellabethabell9003]

​@@eamonnclark7360 Thank you for your response! That was more or less how I'd always looked at it, and since I'd never heard much to the contrary, I had never researched the topic much. At the very least, I'm thankful that Gordon's video made me think on this matter prior to marriage. I think he and his wife are good people, (and they seem very happy together) they just have a way of tackling things like this that is really unhelpful sometimes.

[@viviennedunbar3374]

Timothy Gordon is not Jesus. He has an opinion, a strong opinion and you are free to disagree with his opinion. He is very into macho posturing and (although I personally find him very good looking and sexy) it’s of a certain American Trad Bro kind which does not speak for the whole Church, all Catholics, all Catholic men or even all Catholic men in the USA. You can listen to his opinion and respect it but you have no obligation to hold the same opinion. There is no Catholic Dogma on this issue, every Catholic married couple are unique.

[@RCGWho]

My talk with my daughter: say you want it once a month when you are fertile and he wants it daily, who's right? Women seem to think they can and should say no for any and all reasons, thus the age old joke about "I have a headache." Biblically, she should make her self available, but he should love her enough to not ask if she's literally ill, has a true migraine, just got terrible news, or is on her period. Etc If she doesn't control the whole thing and live in avoidance for whatever reason, he'll be more patient with actual legit reasons to abstain.

[@angrypotato_fz]

Wow, Cameron looks stunning!

[@LadyK007]

She’s beautiful! Physically and spiritually😍

[@nitapalacios4968]

Love Matt and Cameron!❤But can we get a little less of the producer constantly interjecting? He totally cuts off Matt or Cameron mid speech more than once.

[@jamespriney]

Pints Among the Lillies episodes are the best.

[@teamhren1000]

I might just be a jerk, but I didn't feel like Thursday's frequent interjections were very helpful or insightful. I'm sorry :(.

[@gwendolyno.3330]

Came for Cameron stayed for Thursday.

[@morganwaites1420]

“It’s NETs fault, they put us on a team together” I said the saaameee thing about my missionary organization. But we dated and then broke up

[@adapalacios6357]

Not blaming the website but I used Catholic Match and ended up traveling to meet someone who turned out to not be a Catholic at all and completely lied about everything we chatted about for weeks! Never again

[@kellibuzzard9431]

Cameron is awesome. And I miss Neil!