Daughter Wants Her Wedding In Sign Language, Mom Isn't Happy! r/AITA

[@SimplyjustKatey]

The first story: It is hilarious the mom said OP should do it in English because you're in America. There is nothing more American than a language developed in America. (I know of it's French roots but it has evolved into it's own language overtime)

[@amandab8433]

Exactly! I'm hearing but have been studying ASL, and Deaf Culture for a few years. Deaf culture is just that, A Culture with its own language, history, etc. There's even BASL that developed along side of ASL, due to the fact that at one time Deaf Black people were not allowed to attend ASL schools because of segregation. The mom needs to go kick rocks, because first and foremost it's NOT her wedding.

[@pansprayers]

Yup, and the immediate response needs to be, 'The United States does not have an official language, and it's not even the common language in many areas. Until you are fluent in one of the 525+ indigenous languages of the continent, you don't get to say anything.'

[@redtailarts101]

It's funny because the USA doesn't have an official language

[@sianchild]

Agreed. The 'A' in ASL literally stands for American! It's worrying the mum is so unsupportive of her.

[@amberluppens3292]

Let’s not forget that officially, America has no national language. Spanish is just as much its “official” language as English, just as ASL, or even Chinese because just because English is seen as the default, doesn’t mean it’s official. Also you’re completely right, ASL is more an American language than English because at least it was developed there

[@doraynesemik1378]

Your wedding - you and your fiancee's rules. Tell your Mom to be happy she's invited.

[@judyjohnson9610]

What a blessing it was that she married into that family

[@CarlottaHall]

Story 1- in English? ASL= AMERICAN Sign Language! Let your family enjoy the inturpreter.

[@janicevango5791]

The bit that amuses me is that the mother objected to the ceremony being carried out in sign language with speaking interpreters. Is she a bit dense or something? Sometimes people just like to complain for the sake of it or to hear the sound of their own voice.

[@AaaaNinja]

That may be true but.... guess who it is who traditionally pays for the wedding? If that were the case the mom might be entitled and the only way to get out of that is to pay for it some other way.

[@heinz57channel39]

@@janicevango5791 ppppp

[@josavo6377]

I have attended a wedding with both spoken and ASL. It was beautiful! Everyone knew that this couple was special and wanted to include everyone in the moment. The bride was not deaf, the groom and all 20 of his friends were deaf. The bride is actually an ASL+++ interrupter in 4 languages.

[@joimumu]

You can go to a wedding anywhere in the world and still know what’s happening because if ether says no then people outside the church will know about it

[@alboyer6]

3rd story- I would have just dump course work in a big heaping.mess on her bed. Nothing gets destroyed but she has to take time to reorganize.

[@gabebarnes6814]

Story 3: If the mother really wanted to be a jerk/prove a point, she should have chucked the papers on the kid's bed. Throwing out papers without even looking at them first is just idiotic.

[@cgi2002]

I'm going to take a different view here. I grew up in a house were the long established rule was keep your mess to your own space. You leave something in a shared space, you get 1 warning. Ignore the warning and it's taken to be "obviously you don't want it" and its thrown out. Thus from my view this was rubbish been thrown away. It lost the title coursework the moment the entirely reasonable request to tidy up was ignored.

[@thecoolgrandma7208]

I agree that anyone over 18 is now an adult and gets treated l ikke one, meaning Alice needed to act like a responsible adult and put her stuff in her room not leave it in a shared space. I've had this conversation with my grandkids a lot. Either put your crap in your room or it goes in the trash. I am not going to waste my time checking to see what it is or putting it in your rooms, which means I need to figure out which room. It is quicker for you to put it away. So NTA, house rules are rules. As an adult take responsibility for your school work.

[@juresichj]

I agree. Kid leaves stuff in the main part of the house, not where it belongs, you chuck it on their bed.

[@beanieboogie9526]

Who just tosses paperwork without checking it? I help my mother clean her house sometimes and if I find any papers I put them in a stack for her to look at. I think its a case of step mom and kid have always disliked each other and step mom found a way to 'accidently' ruin something for the kid.

[@videofan1010]

Omg - you threw away all her homework. She could have put it in a folder. Being in college makes you busy. You leave things out...

[@hayleyg7719]

The baby ear piercing! Nta for being mad, they stabbed holes in your baby (without your permission as well)

[@songohan3321]

Actually it is worst than that. Everything on and in a baby is still developing and ear piercing will have some damage in some way down the line. Plus correct me if I wrong but a baby does not equal a toddler. So it is too early for Toddlers and Tiaras.

[@judyjohnson9610]

The "logic" is that they won't remember the pain, I think. I had mine done at 40. Sure it hurts, but just for a second. No reason to have it done before the person requests it. I wanted mine done at 13 and my mom told me "sure when you are 16" Fair enough, then I lost interest

[@SilverMaychan]

When I was a baby my grandparents (fathers parents) wanted my ears pierced. My mom said no. So in stead of golden earstuds I got a golden pendant. They didn't ignore my moms wishes.

[@AaaaNinja]

@@judyjohnson9610 Yeah the pain isn't that bad so there's no reason why it would be necessary to worry about saving them from having to go through that. Honestly how many kids out there DON'T beg their parents for piercings at some point in their life? How many actually stop after doing the first side?

[@judyjohnson9610]

@@AaaaNinja There was a chain here in Canada that did ear piercings. Apparently, if the child objected and the parent said "go ahead" that was what was done. What? I am a full believer in consent for that kind of thing. It's not like a medical procedure where the parents have done due diligence and decided it was for the best. Should be grouped in with tattoos

[@jackspring7709]

Story 3: Lol, no way that was a genuine mistake - the wife knew that was coursework and threw it in the bin to teach OP's child a lesson. Wife's an AH, OP's an AH.

[@DestinationsChronicles]

I know, it's a page out of the evil step mothers instruction manual.

[@carissaellensaunders5842]

Story #2 Definitely NTA- They aren't being treated like children, they are being treated like irresponsible adults. Which they definitely seem to be considering the ignorance of possible damage and purposeful disrespect of boundaries. As someone who has damaged ears because of having my ears pierced before 6 months old.

[@lsmmoore1]

Story 4: whether that guy is abusive or not, why is he even with her? Clearly she deals with things by getting excited about plans and researching them. And if the dude can't deal with it, then he shouldn't be living with her. Does he thin he can "fix" it or something? Because you can't force people to give up methods of dealing with things that are perfectly okay and in line with their personality. And if that bothers you - date and marry someone else.

[@ashh4929]

Right? What I don't get is she even said (in OP's own words) "we *talked* about eloping". Then he went zero to near nuclear in a heartbeat. And like you said, they've been together 10 years, even if he is more reserved, he knows her personality quirks. If someone who wears their excitement on their sleeve is so bothersome then he should have realized they aren't compatible. What *is* lunatic behavior is (from her prospective) him snapping and screaming at her out of the blue about a topic that they already discussed and he seemed to be on board with. And he wonders why she's quiet and *gasp* not exhibiting her usual excitetd behavior? I wonder why? I'm so freaking shocked. 🙄 🤦

[@lsmmoore1]

@@ashh4929 Bet he is abusive. And he was leaving details out to make himself look not as bad. But even if I granted him the premise and went on the assumption that his details were accurate, I would still say he was in the wrong shacking up with someone whose main method of coping is so fundamentally incompatible with his own.

[@t.matthies3049]

@@ashh4929 Absolutely. And her response to his family's questions about wedding planning was totally reasonable. They did talk about eloping, and even if there hasn't been a formal proposal, not everyone does a formal engagement with a ring and everything. It could be the girlfriend wasn't expecting one, given that they'd be eloping, and they've been together 10 years, so just talking about it, and than planning something would be sufficient.

[@michamocha]

Exactly. He's been with her for how long??? And he couldn't have been the adult and talk to her about it? I feel like op is being biased in his story telling and it's just a thing he himself has an issue with, not their friends and family. It's like he was trying to paint her as this ridiculous person but it blew up in his face.

[@internetfairi]

I genuinely felt so awful for the girlfriend. I totally get how she deals with things because I do the same thing. Even though I sometimes don't follow through with plans after researching and thinking about it for some time, I've never once had anyone complain about it before. I think that guy is with her for the sake of image for his parents.

[@Ospyro3em]

The OP in the final story isn't making any sense- first he says he's on board with the eloping idea, then, because his mum doesn't like it, he suddenly turns on her and calls her names? The poor girl is probably hurt and confused now- OP is shouting at her for having an idea he agreed with.

[@KyrieChii]

Yeah, he thought eloping (& using the money they saved on a wedding for an awesome honeymoon) was a 'great idea' until his Mother was upset that he would even _consider_ such a thing, particularly as they're already being 'deprived of grandchildren' by the couple (as though they're _owed_ traditional weddings & grandkids), so suddenly, his girlfriend is a _'fucking lunatic'._ He was trying to save face in front of his family so he decided to pretend he wasn't in on the idea & that she was unilaterally making decisions for him, being unreasonable (& giving his family a reason to be angry with her). She needs to either lay down the law with him about how unacceptable that whole episode was, or GTFO & find someone who actually respects her & appreciates her *level headed, research based* enthusiasm instead of insulting her to save his hide. >=/ This pissed me off.

[@jj58232]

I think it was more when they discussed it he thought it's a good idea for eventually. But when she brought it up to his mother it made it seem like it was actually going to happen and not a hypothetical far off idea. Even so, he's been with her 10 years and has zero actual intention to marry her just that one day sure we'll get married.

[@morganrogue5305]

I was thinking that too, it's really weird

[@francb1634]

Story 2: depending where you live, this is considered assault and they could face criminal charge.

[@elkevermeulen7343]

Story 2: at my local tattoo parlor, the piercer refuses to pierce anyone under 16, even for earrings. She told me the ears don't finish growing until mid-teens or something so you can scar the ears by doing it too early. Plus the chance for infection! But yeah, I was about 4 or 5 myself when my mother got my ears pierced, don't like it either. It is such a weird thing how ear rings are seen as cute, but every other piercing or ye gasp, a tattoo, is unacceptable somehow. I don't wear earrings, but plenty of tattoos now.

[@julieeverett7442]

I had my ears pireced at 8 but bit was something I wanted and my mother allowed it. To do so to a baby, who CANT consent is assult

[@tavej4718]

Story 3 just triggered me. My mom does that constantly and then says that I am the one “causing arguments and negativity” when I get mad and yell about my stuff getting thrown away. It’s so infuriating!!!

[@Basketcase12]

That shit's abuse. Hope you can get out of that situation soon.

[@tavej4718]

@@Basketcase12 Sorry this a long explanation, I tried to shorten it as much as possible. Honestly, my mom’s not that bad (or at least not as bad as she could be. She grew up with extremely abusive, controlling, and toxic parents. And she doesn’t do anything that a typical abusive parent would do.) She genuinely loves us and treats us well. It’s just that she has this mentality that it’s her house, she is the only one who cleans, so if it’s in her way, she’s not going to ask someone’s permission to throw something away because if they cared about it they wouldn’t have left it. The problem with that though, is that I have severe ADHD and I developed really bad germaphobia after I had a bad experience. My attention span, if I’m not on my meds, is between 5-15 minutes and while my germaphobia isn’t as bad as it use to be, I absolutely hate the floor and anything that touches it. And as I’m sure you can imagine, I leave things lying around often and, if something falls on the floor, I will leave it there to go get something to clean it with. Once I leave, and that thing on the counter/table/etc. or that thing that fell on the floor is out of my sight, I’ve completely forgotten about it. Then when mom finds it, she decides that it’s trash and she throws it away. Also, I hate the trash WAY more than I hate the floor. Once it’s in the trash, I am NEVER touching it again. So yeah, HUGE source of conflict between me and mom. Moms problem is that she doesn’t understand me and she makes no efforts to try and understand me. It also doesn’t help that I’m impulsive and quick to yell when I get angry.

[@Basketcase12]

@@tavej4718 I see, while I agree your mother loves you, as a victim of abuse as well it is possible to continue the cycle of unhealthy behavior. I should also rephrase and say I hope you and your mom can work it out so there's no more anger and bitterness.

[@tavej4718]

@@Basketcase12 I definitely know that the cycle of abuse can continue. My aunt and one of my two uncles are abusive to their children and those around them. And my grandmother had continued the cycle of abuse as well because my great grandmother was the same way. My mom is nothing like them. The only thing my mom does, which I’m not sure if she’s aware of or not, is when she gets mad she will say things that will anger you or put you down and it’s borderline emotional abuse. But she only does it when she’s angry, my grandmother, aunt and uncle do that constantly. And mine and moms relationship will most likely improve again once I’ve moved back out. We get along better when we aren’t living together.

[@Basketcase12]

@@tavej4718 It does certainly sound like she doesn't realize it. I look at it like this, even if people are related as family it's the same thing as with roommates. They might otherwise get along, but some people are just not meant to live in the same house together. I do hope you can work things out with your mom, you can break the cycle together.

[@justinjones-smith5168]

Story 3: Why didn't the wife, I don't know, LOOK at the papers before chucking it?

[@alicewilloughby4318]

justin jones-smith, I think you mean "before" chucking it, but you're right.

[@TheLugiaSong]

Because she did it on purpose, methinks. Otherwise, any regular person would feel insanely guilty for throwing out someone's course work, but she doubles down. That's what makes me think it wasn't an accident at all.

[@purplefox7168]

Ya I live at home when going to college. If papers on the table my mom will just gather them up and put them in the corner or move them out the way. Well I don't know ask before throwing them away. I think the stepmother did that on purpose.

[@canadalovesanime3137]

Even if she had. She probably wouldn't understand any of it anyway. I think that the girl should hide some of HER(wife's) kids school work.(Just long enough to show everyone how it feels) But I doubt the princess wife would ever understand, never mind admit fault. Her children are clearly better/more important.

[@thunderring3932]

Story 3 Whenever people say things like “am I the ass hole for taking my wife’s side in an argument” I feel like they’re always missing the bigger picture by trying to focus on a more innocent side of the story.

[@catandrobbyflores]

Tell me about it.

[@moakristenssom936]

Too true. Like a story a couple of months ago where the title was, ''Am I the asshole for missing my daughter's award ceremony to stay home with my autistic son?''(or something like that). Basically, the mom was supposed to go to her daughter's ceremony and had even hired a babysitter who was trained to watch autistic kids, but when she was about to leave, the son had a meltdown and instead of letting the babysitter deal with it and do their job, mom chose to stay. This resulted in the daughter basically cutting contact with her mother, because she had been doing this for years(promising to show up, and then never doing so because she prioritized the son over her. The father wasn't in the picture so the daughter had to be alone at every event while watching her friends' parents attend) and the daughter said that it was easier for her to just give up that to get her hopes up and get disappointed every time. But the mom didn't see it that way and ended the question with ''I don't think I deserve to lose my daughter for missing one ceremony'', totally dismissing that this wasn't just one incident, but rather the straw that broke the camels back.

[@catandrobbyflores]

@@moakristenssom936 I remember that one

[@Love2Banime]

@@moakristenssom936 I remember that story. Biggest disappointment. I hope the daughter is living a better life now.

[@KimPossibleShockwave]

Story III had some details left out that were unveiled in comments: basically, the wife has always acted like a complete B to the daughter, even since they first met when she was a kid, and despite saying they were "recycled", she purposely threw them into the food waste bin to contaminate them with rotting food so they couldn't be salvaged. This is basically just another example of severe petty behavior on the wife's part, and the AH husband/father has always backed her up. They weren't just "scrap pieces" of paper, but professionally done documents and examples the daughter was planning to put into her portfolio. The father is also a complete D bag, basically saying, "at her age I had a job, none of this college nonsense" (to paraphrase). Basically, they're S parents, and I can see a mile off that both daughters are going to cut contact the moment they leave the home permanently.

[@jennilynne1977]

Thanks for making this. It sounded a little fishy and OP sounds like an @$$hole in just the post Mark read.

[@KimPossibleShockwave]

@@jennilynne1977 Yeah. He truly is a terrible father, and he can't even see it. Wife's a witch because he had a family before he met her.

[@jennilynne1977]

@@KimPossibleShockwave kinda sounded like it just from the post.

[@t.matthies3049]

Even without those details, you don't throw out papers without asking. Just chuck it all in a box or a bag and leave it in her room if you're fed up with it. That way, nothing important gets lost, you get your clean table, and everything is mixed up enough that the daughter's gets frustrated enough to learn her lesson, but no damage is done. At the very least, they should have warned the daughter that anything left on the table by x date and time will be thrown out (making sure to actually give them enough time to clear everything out). Again, even if it did look like scrap paper, you don't want to accidentally throw out something important (at least, reasonable people don't).

[@canadalovesanime3137]

I hope so. That man deserve to left all alone in his misery(with the toxic wife) in his old age. They can go form their own little private island of toxicity.

[@annaorbanes5070]

#3 Why not just put all the papers in a bag and put them in her room. Problem solved, no upset or drama.

[@ettinakitten5047]

But that wouldn't allow her to properly express how much she hates her stepdaughter and wants to ruin her life!

[@sciencenerd218]

Story 2: Absolutely NTA! Of course they made a HUGE BREACH of trust and they need to be cut off

[@ShatoraDragondore]

Story 3: I get the feeling that with the age of the second daughter (14) OP didnt exactly keep it in his pants till the divorce was settled and that is the root of Alice and his new wife butting heads so much Alice is living breathing proof OPs wife is wife number two.

[@xreinachan5872]

I swear these moms are the absolute worst on this subreddit...Mark can do a compilation of how bad they are-

[@MarkNarrations]

A rating of all top bad ones...hmmmm :)

[@xxratsrcutexx3494]

@@MarkNarrations sounds interesting! :D

[@HackiePuffs]

@@MarkNarrations DO IT!!!!

[@digitalharmony26]

Yes.

[@sarahjaneuldricks6729]

Hear me out [phrasing intended]: get an interpreter that will do the translation into an Indigenous language if the mom is so hard up on having it in the og American languages

[@15oClock]

1. Good god, the ableism in this mom! I hope OP can get her brother outta there! 2. Thalia's grandparents don't care about her parent's wishes. That's dangerous. 3. Alice is better of living with her real mom. If she wants a future, she'll get one there. 4. Why is OP even with her? He clearly hates her; why does he pretend otherwise?

[@justfelicitous5109]

I love how emotional Mark gets reading these sometimes. He cares about all the people 😊

[@owl7072]

Last story: OP went on a little tangent about how she'll get excited about something and then never follow through and I'm starting to see why. She's so excited about the thought of eloping and Op snapped at her, calling her a selfish lunatic. No fucking wonder she doesn't follow through on things if that's how he acts about it. She was so excited, she just wanted to tell people about it and he just fucking took it and ripped it to shreds, I'd leave him if that's something he did often, or just something he did about things I was very obviously really excited about.

[@thecoolgrandma7208]

🤔 Wait.... he never actually proposed. So just because they are batting ideas around Doesn't mean he was ready for his family to hear any of them. From his point of view it wasn't set in stone it was just an idea in passing. Sounds like his Mother takes things straight to her heart while the GFs family are use to the GFs whims just being a passing thing so probably just agree to not discourage her knowing that it could change anyway. But maybe OPs Mother Doesn't know this about the GF, so felt that was what they were really discussing not that it was just a passing thought.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 2: NTA. They irreparably changed the baby without anyone's consent. It IS a big deal. It's assault at best. The ear piercing is a sign of a major lack of respect for boundaries. It's about trust, or lack thereof.

[@SyadeHaan]

The coursework story. I have the same awful habit of just making a gosh darn mess of everything, somehow I am able to find everything I need. Usually I claim that being messy is a sign of a creative mind (I am just kind of missing out on the creative part). My parents make 1 humongous pile of what ever I leave laying around and if I need something I can fish it out of there. They never threw anything out, even if it was obvious that it was rubbish. That was, and is, my own job to do. And even though I no longer live with them, the things I leave laying around their place end up in my room or office space at their house (I have a work setup there because I can't in my apartment and my parents don't want to use upstairs for themselves because there is too much noise according to them, so I have two rooms there) If OP or his wife would have just put it in the daughter's room, or even her bed (that is making a statement, trust me) it would have had the effect of teaching her she needs to put her stuff away without her needing to repeat it. In this case, I rule an E S H. The daughter for not even attempting to keep her mess to her own room or trying to comply with the rules, the stepmom for throwing it away when there were other options, OP for the 'my house, so I decide what is rubbish' statement.

[@akshata12358]

Yes

[@HaleyJo1992]

I was pulled from a dance once for a deaf classmate to sign that an interpreter was being called to the station (dunno why he was detained) and would meet them there. To this day what stands out to me was his mom didn't know ASL. He was 16, his little sister was 8, both profoundly deaf, and the mother didn't sign. I'm still horrified by that 15 years later.

[@puli_dreadhead]

Regarding the earrings story. The piercing can cause scar tissue that could lead to keloids or infection. If the keloid forms you will have to see a doctor for treatment if you want to remove them. You can’t just pop it and they don’t stop growing. NTA

[@Mspryce4]

Story 3: the wife did it on purpose. Simple. She could of just gathered the papers and chuck it in her room. My children always leave there paper work all over the house but I’d never throw it away without checking first, as much as it annoys me.

[@digitalharmony26]

“No kids, and now you’re eloping too..?” Oh Jesus, your life must be sooo difficult 🙄 your child is grown, let him make his own damn decisions.

[@GIChiyo]

Every time you go "wwwwwwwwWHAT is up, wafflegang!" you make my cat jump on the "what" lol

[@lillithherondale1972]

My mom waited until I was around 6 or older to get my ears pierced because i wanted it. My little sister who's 10 has shown no interest in getting ear piercings so she doesn't have any. And I won't pierce my future children's ears until they're older and show genuine interest and actually show they want it. And I'll be sure to show them how to care for them too

[@damien678]

story 4... man her excitement reminds me of my adhd excitement & impulsiveness bc of that hyperness (not saying she has it bc of that, but i am curious if she has it bc thatd make sense to me and make how hes acting even worse)

[@ChampiVenao]

Yeah, i thought of my adhd too :0 the bf is still an ass tho, hope she drops him and throws him in the trash 😌✨✨

[@TheLugiaSong]

Yo I said the exact same! That's exactly what it reminded me of when I heard it. Sucks people don't try and understand why people do things the way they do, instead they just insult them and call them "lunatics" but eyo. I think slowly people are changing in that regard, at least those who are trying to understand others.

[@tobybarnett7147]

Story 2: nta. The parents were right. A friend did it which sounds like it was a piercing gun which are horrible. I’m against piercing babies too. They can’t consent it’s not for them it’s not for a health reason. It’s all just because it “looks cute” I had mine done as a baby. Your baby is perfect already there’s no need to pierce someone who can’t consent or understand what’s going on. I have my tongue pierced (not sure how similar it feels since I was a baby for my ears) and it hurt. I couldn’t imagine being a baby and being put through unnecessary pain. There are also clip on and magnetic earrings. Baby’s pull on EVERYTHING I can’t imagine it would heal well

[@mukuroikusaba7998]

Even ASL and BSL are different.

[@purplefox7168]

BSL does that mean British sign language or something else?

[@BloodPixi3]

@@purplefox7168 Yes British Sign Language

[@BloodPixi3]

@Melody Ackerman I think linguistically accent is the wrong world. It is more akin to slang or dialect but yes sign languages are fascinating.

[@annsnyder4662]

It is your wedding, NOT your mothers. Have what YOU want.

[@FrancisR420]

As an sighing impaired individual I gotta say that deaf wedding sounds like an amazing once-in-a-lifetime experience.

[@J2hawk]

Story 2: NTA- never leave them alone with the kids until at minimum they admit how shitty they were to do that. And to comment on one of the comments, don't twist new piercings! It increases the chance of infection by a crazy margin and makes the heal time much longer! And make sure your first stud isn't plated, solid surgical steel or the like only! Also avoid piercing guns.

[@TheHellsHobbit]

#3 NTA sorry the kid is old enough to keep her schoolwork secure if it is that important. I wold have gotten a baket and just put the papers in it and then say next time any papers left laying around will be tossed in the trash as that would be the papers are not important enough to be taken and place were they are safe, NTA

[@chulutheimposter5415]

Good evening Mark!! How are you today? I hope all is well and I wish you a great night!! That title, as soon as I read that I was like "Wait a minute HOL UP" OP isn't even an AH for this, she's deaf, most of the guests are deaf, they have someone who will translate it. 100% NTA.

[@MarkNarrations]

Yeah I was like that when I saw the title on reddit.

[@JayeEllis]

Story 2: NTA - Not only did they go against your express parental decision, they physically ASSAULTED your baby, and took away her bodily autonomy. They'd be lucky if I didn't sue!

[@raihastorm9105]

Some stories before sleep, a perfect way to calm down after a long day of school work.

[@MarkNarrations]

Enjoy your sleep my friend!

[@raihastorm9105]

@@MarkNarrations thank you Mark. I did enjoy it :>

[@amusing4me257]

Umm I’m an American and think that we should all know ASL. It’s incredibly helpful. I don’t appreciate mom speaking on my behalf

[@emibaka309]

Again commenting here what im doing while listening; I am sorting out my dolls! I photograph them and create art that way. I build small miniature worlds for them as well 😄 I hope everyone is doing great!

[@Fairygoblet]

I love that craft! I tried it once. I am the only one who can re-root doll hair period in the end I had to get the leftover hair out as best as I could and then cover the bald scalp with air-dry clay and glue the hair on. Do you post yourself with anywhere? I would love to see them.

[@MarkNarrations]

Awesome! Is that like a thing I saw on tiktok recently. The person was making a TINY pot of pringles. Was pretty impressive

[@Alyrulz421]

I absolutely hate people who post on AITA feeling like they're not the asshole and they're justified and try their hardest to frame the situation in their favor, then won't even accept the criticism that THEY ASKED FOR. The dad in that story is TA %3000 it's exactly like how it used to be with my stepmom. "I did something terrible to my stepkid but they're only upset with me because they hate me for being an authority figure." OP doesn't even mention offering to help fix the situation and help their kid not fail the class because they're obviously upset, just jumps immediately to coving their own ass. The last story as well. How can people be so obsessed with themselves that they can spin any situation in their head to feel that they're not wrong?

[@phoenixsky6124]

Sign language is perfectly normal. So glad you found a place in this world where you fit. Make it the way YOU want it.

[@charmoz292]

Story 3. Put it in a box on her bed or outside her bedroom door. The step mother knew exactly what these papers were. It was definitely malicious! Her father is an arse! Constantly whinging that he is supporting his daughter through college! She needs to move in w her mum. And well done for pursuing your career, young lady, especially w all that's going on in the world.

[@infinessia4019]

I haven’t seen the comment section of story III, but something tells me this backfired in AH Dad’s face.

[@janglesthearsonist5265]

Story 3: NTA The daughter needs to follow the rules of the house even if she did pay rent. She's been made aware of this issue multiple times and if her sister can keep her coursework in her out of shared spaces while not working on it than so can the daughter. Please continue to bin anything on the table that doesn't belong there to keep things fair.

[@tansybean1854]

Last story: It sounds like op's gf might have a tendency for hyperfixation, a lot of people have this and it's not a bad thing. Usually neurodivergent people have that tendency so I'm curious if the gf has ever been diagnosed.

[@maddy4362]

Man I genuinely don’t know what I’d do without your videos. I drive like 6 hours a day for work and spend the whole time listening to you. Thank you for posting so consistently! I don’t really care if it’s weird that I listen so much since I’m assuming it helps you get paid 😂 and this the most wholesome one of these channels, plus I hate those robot voice ones

[@mollyoconnor9365]

Last op sounds like the kinda dude who calls any behaviour he doesn't like from a woman 'crazy'. Wonder if he has a string of 'crazy' exes...

[@pamcauble3755]

Love listening to Mark while working on some resin projects. Makes me smile with every video

[@nyx.8254]

As far as I know, the UK doesn't have specific age limits for piercings and it's up to the studio/piercer. My local studio doesn't have an age limit as long as you're there with a parent or have ID proof you're over 16

[@kylee8677]

the sheer ableism towards OP in that first one. DISGUSTING. i hope the poor brother doesnt get the same treatment.

[@kathybeckford3592]

Hi Mark!🙋🏾‍♀️ ASL Wedding: This is like a story I heard where a kid went home from the hospital with the wrong family and when they found their blood family they finally felt understood and accepted. The parents had all of OP's life to accept her deafness (which is a culture all it's own) but refused. Now they're demanding her to cater to a world she's not part of? Love your daughter, accept the interpreter and be happy for her special day! Grandparents: I'd do the same thing OP did. If you can't trust the parents with this what about something more serious like allergies? I've heard stories of relatives not believing the child's allergy was real and nearly killing them. They need to earn the trust back! (Sorry I always seem to write books on here.)

[@DuckTapeWarrior1]

It looks like in most states, but not all, it’s illegal to do without parental consent in the USA. I’d guess it is illegal in their state as they had a friend do it instead of taking them to a professional. If anyone is getting their ears pierced don’t go to Claire’s, go to a professional. I got mine done when I was in middle school and it still isn’t fully healed.

[@fatcatlol_4820]

When I went to my friends house yesterday, he asked if I wanted pancakes or waffles for breakfast. Those waffles were delicious.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Nice

[@MarkNarrations]

*nods* Good Panda, good! :)

[@awwmandac2556]

Happy birthday to me

[@katiesmith2031]

Happy birthday have a good one

[@yabe-kfptentacultist]

Happy Birthday!

[@spikethenonbinaryteenager2671]

Happy birthday!

[@GreenSkye42]

Hey have an amazing birthday 🎂🎂🎂🥳🥳🥳 hope you have an awesome day 🎂🥳🎂🥳

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAVE A GREAT ONE 💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@frith.calluna]

Ah good timing! I'm gonna listen to this while taking a shower hahaha

[@Gingerycarrotkitten]

That is so funny you mention you had a eyebrow peircing too. I had one when I was in highschool that didnt last long ether. First day I got it I went home and started brushing my bangs just for my comb to get snagged on it ugh. Surface piercings were a no go from then on lol.

[@paperpager]

For Story One, “normal hearing” (including myself) people don’t realize that for deaf people, their norm IS soundless. That’s how they see the world- just like how we the world with hearing. My great aunt is deaf, but can talk and that’s her way of communicating. She can read lips and at times hear (we have to be loud though), and can read lips more easily if she’s readings lips with lipstick on. I learned sign a little bit at my current college, and the teacher was completely deaf. He had English speaking interpreters on the first day of class for introductions, and they left within 20-30 minutes. He taught the whole class silent, which was so fascinating. He would write, type, ASL spell the alphabet, and use simple signs in order to teach us (an in-person classroom). Although it’s been a year so what I learned has faded a bit, his class definitely impacted how I see ASL and the deaf community. OP’s mom is ridiculous, and any family members who are on the mother’s side. They can handle a ceremony of interpreters for them- who WILL BE THE MINORITY OF GUESTS as most of them will be deaf! It’s insanely entitled that they don’t realize that lmao. Would they rather have no one to translate? So they have to sit in silence and wait until it’s over? I would’ve loved to be present in a wedding like that- it’s amazing to see how people outside of my own culture and “norm” do their traditions and their own versions of special events.

[@liagotosleep264]

My real name is Thalia, it's pronounced Th al lee ah

[@who_the_fuck_is_riley5813]

I've seen it pronounced as Tall-ee-uh too. I think it depends on where you're from Edit: It's also a really cool name either way

[@mandaryanne815]

Hmmm. My boyfriend is deaf with bi-cochlear implants, and doesn't sign. Although his mom did make the effort to teach him to sign at a young age, he is around hearing people too much and lost it. I will make sure to get his thought on the first story when he gets home and update yall (although I'm pretty sure I already know where his stands).

[@nocause5395]

I wonfer what his relationship with the deaf community is because I know some people who have implants have been pushed out of the community because they consider implants an afront to their community.

[@mandaryanne815]

@@nocause5395 he has little relationship. He went to a deaf school when he was young but then after that just went to tradition schools. Over all his experience is pretty similar to hers, although I views is implant much differently. He is extremely grateful for them and was glad he could go to traditional school. To add: those in the community to invalidate my boyfriends existence are just be cruel. For god sake the man got these implants as an infant, it is what it is.

[@whims6278]

Omg my partner and I also decided our daughter could choose about her ears being pierced, and if someone did that behind our backs I would be FURIOUS. Thats a huge boundary being crossed

[@marcusgray2799]

10 years together and no engagement or marriage. Girl leave this child. 😭

[@AuntLoopy123]

I loved the "Dear Reddit" letter about the forever girlfriend getting excited about eloping. That comment was brilliant.

[@MrMrSockhead]

Day: 123 of telling Mark that he is wonderful and deserves the world

[@Ospyro3em]

Has it really been 123 days?! Time flies...

[@MarkNarrations]

My word Dead, 123 days! You legend

[@louellacharlton4425]

Went and saw a whole concert in ASL. It was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen... Just fabulous. Oh and I'm a speaking America not deaf..

[@purplefox7168]

I took a ASL class in college And glad I bid. The parents in the story are not uncommon. But I think it should count as child abuse. Picture yourself in there position being not able to communicate with others. Learn and teach it because it not that heard to learn basic phrases. Even if they away they can be " fixed " not ever one able to go for the surgery or pay for it. It also it there wedding they can have it in any language they wish.

[@pansprayers]

Yeah, my aunt was this way with my cousin - he was born stone deaf thanks to EDS (Weirdly, I have the opposite issue of hyperacousis due to the same genetic quagmire), and TO THIS DAY (38 years later, he's one year to the day younger) she refuses to grasp that he's not *eligible* for one, even if he wanted it (he, um, vocally doesn't). The kicker? She's a damn nurse.

[@purplefox7168]

@@pansprayers wow your aunt nuts. I never understood why people are like that. In my asl class my teacher told me some parents who have deaf children but the parents are hearing don't learn asl. Then the parents are completely confused by their children like staying at the deaf School. I wonder why you have to get Sherlock Holmes. It not like they around people they can talk too.

[@jessiejeanne9717]

Lol, my best friend pierced my nose with one of those home ear piercing kits, but she had worked at Claire's and was trained to pierce. I still love it after 30 years! No tats tho.

[@blackrosebud2331]

Story 2: as a person with many many piercings I am 100% against letting babies get their ears pierced, and I very much agree with OP‘s decision to not let The grandparents around his child unsupervised anymore, even ear piercings hurt, they leave marks, I don’t care how cute the grandparents thought it would be that is purposefully modifying your grandchild body without parental consent and at least where I live you can get in a lot of trouble for that

[@Ineverfinishedsailormoon]

Baby girls getting ears pierced as babies is part of my culture and my mom pierced my ears as a baby and I’m happy she did cause I probably wouldn’t get it as an adult. But i definitely think it’s up to the parents.

[@amusing4me257]

Exactly what I feel!

[@JSainte17]

Also the only story I remember was OP’s parents baptizing the baby behind their back.

[@randysmith9636]

Good evening Mark from mid TN. Hope you are having a great day.

[@invictrus]

First story: The only thing that bothers me is everyone saying first language, instead of primary language.

[@candiebarr6745]

Who ever heard of a wedding ceremony done in a language the couple getting married have a hard/impossible time understanding?

[@littleflame5530]

I'd sue my step mom. Asking for emotional and mental health compensation. This is basically harassment on the step mother's part I bet she is trying to force the girls to go no contact and move out.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Whoever is reading this i send hugs and great vibes. Drink water, eat food, nap, take a break, take care of yourself gosh darn it. And if you don't I swear I will find you and keep you in a cottage and take care of you. 🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@FlamesofJagger]

Yo Broken. Stay cool and take care of yourself. Thanks for the well wishes. As always stay positive.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@FlamesofJagger awww thank you 💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@suzichizu]

I got my ears pierced when I was a baby.. I don't like wearing earrings so that's that I really don't get when the rest of the family members all butt in something they know very little about

[@janmots2829]

Did her Mom seriously just say "Your in America you should speak English? Those parents are the AH and they are also ablelists as well. They did not teach her ASL and insisted on wearing cochlear implants so they didn't have to. SMDH.. 😑

[@itrasheditgood]

Sounds like the woman in the last story is ready for marriage, holy hell OP is the AH. 10 years and no engagement? She’s not nuts, she’s just being strung along. OP’s parents clearly believe that she is the reason for the delays. I think that neither are on the same page ever, they don’t agree about anything life decision wise and OP calls gf crazy because he’s not willing to back any one of her ideas in any form. Her ideas die quietly because she does the research but he is not supporting her when it is clear as day that she wants to move forward. At this point the best thing OP can do is let her go, he doesn’t want to share his life with her, he just wants control.

[@GreenSkye42]

Hey Mark your awesome 😸🧇😸 Hope everyone is doing well

[@redtailarts101]

I'm not even 10 seconds in and the little waving animation was so cute wtf-

[@SparDanger]

The grandparents in story 2 are damn lucky that the parents didn't move out of state with their baby! As a mom myself, this angers me a lot!

[@theartist100]

story 2: i'd call that assault and would seek legal action

[@Josku2411]

Discord brought me quicker than youtube

[@katiesmith2031]

That's normally the way

[@Josku2411]

@@katiesmith2031 Indeed but sometimes youtube gives me curveball days and is quicker and i was on a small streak of those

[@katiesmith2031]

@@Josku2411 I know you just never know which one Guess it keeps it interesting lol

[@parkerabbott2189]

The first story, I'm pretty sure I know the school they didn't let OP attend. It's huge, and my partner who works for the school districts says it's an excellent school. Just to make the parent's assholishness even clearer

[@9999plato]

They coud have put the paperwork in a box and put it in her room. That was spiteful and mean. I would not speak with her either.

[@amazinglynn]

First story: I like how OP’s mom’s reasoning for wanting the ceremony in English is that they’re in America. I’d argue that *_American_* Sign Language is more American than English...after all they’re not in England 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@BIGEAGLEDUDE]

With the second-story go no contact with them and quite honestly you might as well go ahead and press criminal charges because if they did it against the child will and against the wishes of the parents that's charged for aggravated child abuse and to some degree kidnapping. You might as well but press criminal charges because this is only going to get worse while also getting a restraining order against them. In addition you might want to have a serious conversation with other family members and ask them how would you feel if your parents did that to you. Let's see how long that lasts. I get it they want the grandchildren to be back in their lives if it's piercing of the ears today it will be her wearing makeup and sitting on weird uncle's lap tomorrow

[@ThomasWLalor]

Here's the fun part of Story ONE: How will you sign for the concept of 'go forth and multiply?' THAT ought to be hilarious! Story @: Child Protective Services should have been contacted. I'd also restrict other relatives seeing the baby w/o supervision, if that is their objection.

[@taetannim3581]

Earring story: yeah, OP could sue.

[@dragonpokemonlover237]

Story 1 NTA Op’s mum is in the wrong denying her daughter to learn sign language

[@moonbear5929]

ASL IS in English! It's just signed rather than verbally uttered. I say, it's YOUR wedding, do it how ever you want. If mom doesn't like it, mom doesn't have to attend. BTW, good on your cousin for wanting to learn ASL.

[@kelseylauer6477]

ASL is actually it's own separate language. It doesn't follow the same Grammer or word order to start

[@Keira_Akoma]

Story 4: He's the jerk, but it also sounds like the girlfriend may have some form of mania though as well.

[@wintertimber1749]

The second story reminds of something very similar that happened to me as a baby. My dad's sister is very religious and she took me to get my ears pierced without my parents knowing. As a baby, I couldn't take care of the earrings and my aunt did nothing to help so the puncture wounds got infected. My dad said they got so infected, he had to cut parts of my ear lobes off to get the earrings out. Now that I'm older, I like the idea of earrings but I *loathe* the idea of getting my ears pierced. Then I found out clip-ons exist

[@jennydrake491]

Story 1: I don't know how the mom expected the ceremony to be in English when the groom and the pastor can't speak it. It's so sad for the OP that she grew up in a family that couldn't really accept her deafness. I'm so glad she has a whole other family and community now.