David Mitchell has a rant about Christmas | Michael McIntyre's Comedy Roadshow | BBC Comedy Greats

David Mitchell has a long rant about Christmas.
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[@atomicmrpelly]

I remember watching this when it was on the telly, I had forgotten how funny it was. God bless David Mitchell. Is he technically a national treasure yet? Because he should be.

[@jacobl6714]

Well, Sean Lock's gone atr this point n I believe he was the national authority on whether someone was or not. But yes, if I had a vote I'd definitely say mitchell is one of the uk's best exports

[@TheOneWhoMightBe]

"For Christmas, everything changes completely, for a whole month!" Except if you work in retail, where it's three months.

[@stevenjones5964]

“That’s not very Christmassy”

[@itsjumbojoe2136]

thought of the peep show when he said that lol

[@romainsavioz5466]

It was a joke mark

[@lesageethan2380]

@@romainsavioz5466 A christmas joke

[@jimmygolucky23]

Sausages and genocidal guilt is the most accurate description of my country I have ever heard.

[@cassdy91]

Your people did the right thing, we salute you for that 🙋

[@earlyre]

But really, in all honesty, shouldn't that description apply to the English as well? Not to mention We Americans...

[@alex_evstyugov]

You need to hear more descriptions of your country, then. "Sausages and genocidal guilt" has never been a less accurate cliché than it is today. Vegetarianism is at an all-time high in Germany. And genocidal guilt at an all-time low.

[@generalthl8078]

Александр Евстюгов - Genocidal guilt is absolutely not at an all time low. If it is, then I’d suggest we intervene quickly before another genocide is enacted

[@ultrademigod]

@@earlyre England doesn't have a history of genocide...not on purpose anyway.

[@antoniomusura1963]

because I am not yet queen :D

[@sammym2426]

The emphasis on "yet", of course. :D

[@giantred]

It is good to have goals.

[@valenworld]

As a german citizen I can say: we get to have genecidal guilt AND indoor trees. What a time to be alive!

[@mattcullen6109]

Truly decadent. Lol😂

[@mikeggg5671]

Yes, the fact that the perpetrators of those deeds are dead means nothing, while the British, AMERIKANs, Russians, Chinese, Italians, Zulus, Muslims, French, Dutch, Belgians, Congoloese, Rwandans, and everyone else who SHOULD have genocidal guilt, doesnt't - - - what a hypocritical world we live in.

[@banjopink4409]

@@szymonstarowicz Roundabouts are a British invention, "my man".

[@STho205]

Banjo Pink. Italian. Defensive street design. In the Renaissance, which the Sceptered Isle missed out on till the great fire, then had a belated one. A proper British one mind you!

[@STho205]

mike ggg. I was attacked by screaming Zulus just the other day on my way to buy jam. And those horrible Belgians were actually cheering them on and making wagers. Bloody Waloons.

[@leanneblake4248]

David is a Joy . I love his Soapbox.

[@debrabelz]

Dear David, im watching you on my cell phone. In bef. In Santa Fe New Mexico. OnLine

[@rowanaboat4523]

Look at the ones you love Now look at the other ones

[@adberrevoets6759]

Geen belang stelling hier in

[@sheisveryfamous]

NATIONAL TREASURE

[@McSuperfly101]

NICOLAS CAGE! Too easy, gimme another one...

[@the0point]

@@McSuperfly101 ba hahaha

[@bournemouthisshit]

A religio-retail festival like no other: BRILLIANT!

[@johanstrom3271]

Pure and utter genius!

[@michaeltalley51]

I wish we had one of him in America.

[@barbarasmith4043]

At least we have the Internet, so that we can listen to his gorgeous rants! :)

[@aleksisuuronen9094]

@Jack Skellington Sean Lock boring, haven't heard that before. His who cares attitude and quick wit works well with Jon Richarson. Seinfeld I don't really get either, many times his jokes are very flat.

[@redrackham6812]

@Eric Burkheimer That's not very close.

[@aleksisuuronen9094]

@Jack Skellington Väärä formaatti, ei mätsänny Locken huumorin kanssa. Puhuin just sen ketä kiinnostaa asenteesta, se toimii tosi hyvin esim. 8 out of 3 catsissä missä hän johtaa toista tiimiä. Cats Does Counrdownissa sen kiinnostus leveli on tota QI tasoa ja silti se kyyniset mustat valitus läpätkin toimii ihmisiin, eli formaatista kiinni. Sean on enemmän fiilikseltään sun lähipubissa käyvä helvetin hauska jätkä vähän niinkun Lee Mack eikä intellektuelli. Yks parhaista Locke momenteista on Big Fat Quiz pätkä missä hän ranttaa näyttelevistä lapsista. QI:ssakin Locken läpät meni helvetin hyvin läpi kun hän kyllästyy Rory McGraween, tosin toimi paremmin tässä QI:n hetkessä koska kohde on yleisesti inhottu jäbä.

[@BNL07604]

@Jack Skellington Hey! Sean Lock is good!

[@AdlinLing]

What you eat between Christmas and New Year's does not matter. What matters is what you eat between New Year's and Christmas.

[@joemcelroy7202]

"Sausages and genocidal guilt" 😂😂😂😂😂

[@spenser9908]

Why would we have genocidal guilt? These leftists and their self-flagellation are nauseating. They sneer at anyone proud of their country and push self-loathing like it's trendy.

[@XhoowieX]

@@spenser9908 It was part of a set about Christmasland and people who believe in flying reindeers. That was the subtle clue that it just may have been a joke.

[@spenser9908]

@@XhoowieX Come on now, let's not hide behind the "it was a joke" excuse. What was the joke, exactly?

[@XhoowieX]

@@spenser9908 Excuse? It was part of a comedy rant and everybody laughed when he said it. Your level of paranoia is worrying.

[@spenser9908]

@@XhoowieX I'm sorry, mate, what exactly was the joke, though? You haven't answered, you've just said "it was a joke" and nothing else. There's obviously some truth behind it to the people laughing, so what is the joke?

[@unlokia]

Brits ~~~ Christmas - Q: _"What's that noise on the roof?"_ A: _"Reindeer"_ Rest of year: Q: _"What's that noise on the roof?"_ A: _"Rain, dear"_

[@romainsavioz5466]

GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT

[@Saint_Dan132]

"So instead of sausages and genocide guilt" what a star i wish I came up with that Mitchell and Webb look what an amazingly hillerious sketch show. X

[@skytreeschalice]

Less rant; more poetry! Could totally print this and stick it in a poetry anthology with more Mitchell monologues!

[@skytreeschalice]

Or a really large Christmas card

[@eveb446]

Very, very funny indeed!!! Congratulations and thank you for the laughs.

[@annabrown3337]

i LOVE Christmasland! I am a fully paid-up resident of the reindeer-loving-brigade!! :)

[@mjowsey]

That was fantastic.

[@wendyrobson1530]

I saw him once, in Sainsburys

[@niallkeville]

No wait, i mean tell me more.

[@esthermigo3009]

Steve Blundell oh my god

[@Nopperabou]

Excellent.

[@stevejackson3815]

A genius.

[@lookatthisbizarre2940]

love the little british stabs towards germans in their comedy. its not malicious but also not cheap laughter. its like a divorced couple with some love left but also some detest

[@99griff99]

An actual comedy great!

[@roxanne4820]

the day david stops ranting is the day i die

[@ewanmcfadyen]

It was a joke. I was joking. It was a Christmas joke.

[@tomwright4969]

When he appears from that curtain all I think of is "Surprise. Hello its me. Look I've surprised you. What a brilliant Joke ."

[@oalre]

At first glance, I thought this was David’s speech for a major award he won and he was going off on a rant. Wouldn’t have been surprised though. God I love that specimen.

[@beniteztheconman]

you seem very annoying

[@maxmarks3503]

You seem very rude@@beniteztheconman

[@veganvocalist4782]

😂

[@dead_sync3680]

Watching this in August

[@dmontes133]

David Mitchell is the best!

[@sarac.3568]

...while shaking with nicotine withdrawal :D

[@OfficialFingazMC]

Never fails to disappoint!

[@hdspade]

where’s the turkey jeremy?

[@mayisuppose]

I thought You were getting the turkey!

[@jackbudgen8858]

🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

[@danielhunt5265]

It was a joke. A Christmas joke

[@thetessellater9163]

About right! - Bah! Humbug

[@themanipulator1]

Ah yes... A typical scene

[@sureshhirawat]

Damn david looks fine.

[@sarcasmo57]

Hello from January land.

[@TheHutchy01]

It's a soapbox with a beard.

[@BeatlemaccaAR]

"They're having salad Nicoise for Christmas. Salad Nicoise".

[@Pagliacci_Rex]

I'm an American but I'd totally vote for David as Queen. He'd set the country right.

[@irishpatriotv2575]

Brits: no Genocidal guilt Irish history: Am i a joke to you?

[@RIXRADvidz]

as much a holiday classic as ''The SnowMan''. look around at those you love, now look at the others, there, that'll give you something to talk about.

[@mutsa_]

“genocidal guilt” 💀

[@GoodKingMort]

Wait when was this?

[@antoniomusura1963]

I think 2011

[@jukahri]

xmas

[@sebastianlang1008]

Reindeer can fly, just throw them hard enough.

[@franzkafka6208]

David, England isn't excluded from genocidal guilt 😂😂😂

[@silvasilvasilva]

Well, most former imperial powers aren't, but Germany is on a league of its own there.

[@gargamellenoir8460]

@@silvasilvasilva Look up what the East India Company did. They really gave it a go.

[@klemensk8776]

But here in germany it is really branded in to the culture

[@vittoriagnecchi5783]

Of course he woud

[@_IHateHandles_]

'Merry Christmas' - **scowls**

[@YoonbeenPark]

[@Ngamotu83]

Why couldn't they have gone with the European swallow rather than a reindeer? Now there's a migratory animal that can fly, and when harnessed into groups can carry things heavier than themselves.

[@Menkhor]

David Mitchell is a national treasure. This wasn't his best though.

[@phobosmoon4643]

“Which gives a troubling glimpse into their nationalistic furor.” Heh ~in American~

[@PazuChill]

Marzipan is great.

[@mariakaleigh2388]

Today, Christmas day, is a special day. Which just means it's not normal. I'm not usually allowed to stand in the box and address the nation, because I am not yet queen.

[@mariakaleigh2388]

But this is all fine because I doubt things are normal where you are either. You are probably surrounded by family, the ones you love, and the other ones. So look around you now at the ones you love, now look at the other ones. That should give you something to talk about.

[@mariakaleigh2388]

So things aren't normal at the moment because of Christmas, a religion retale festival like none other. It's rivals just last for a day, you get a red rose, pancake ,pumpkin, fireworks or popy and have a bloody good time

[@mariakaleigh2388]

But for Christmas everything changes completely for a whole month it's as allien as if we became Germany but it's not Germany it's Christmas land. So instead of sausages and genocidel guilt you get mald wine and indoor trees.

[@mariakaleigh2388]

They're an odd bunch the people of Christmas land, while our popular music tends to center around empty cliques of love theirs centers around empty cliques of good will and is more likely to mention reindeer, an animal which the people of Christmas land are obsessed

[@SpaceCattttt]

Imagine this being said on American TV by an American comic..........................that's right, you can't.

[@DSQueenie]

teppolundgren Bill Burr?

[@redrackham6812]

Of course not. An American comic wouldn't have an English accent, and probably wouldn't refer to being queen either.

[@SpaceCattttt]

@@redrackham6812 And a real person would have no need to name himself after a Tintin supporting character...

[@redrackham6812]

@@SpaceCattttt I didn't need to. I wanted to.

[@SpaceCattttt]

@@redrackham6812 That's even worse.

[@nubl37]

I feel like 90% of this speech went over the heads of 90% of the audience

[@blenderpanzi]

Funnily enough it was Germans who came up with Christmas trees. (Mulled wine is a Roman invention.)

[@drsnova7313]

@steve gale Depends on what custom you refer to. The Germans were the first ones to have "personal" Christmas trees, apparently, but were not the first ones to decorate some (public) tree for Christmas.

[@helenosa5621]

Aren't the indoor trees also a German tradition?

[@georgebryant7721]

Poppy?

[@FenderX]

This guy sums upp why i dont like christmas anymore...

[@Beansahol]

based as usual

[@cupcakequeenxxx1]

static robin

[@TheOneWhoMightBe]

Good band name.

[@kidmohair8151]

seriously hold a referendum to see if you should hold another referendum

[@NotDuncan]

Funniest moment in Canadian history kzbin.info/www/bejne/g4mkpmyGe7ODa6c

[@ella3328]

Cauliflower is not traditional

[@gavinalan]

I can't believe the eloquent David Mitchell said "orientated"

[@EricJeanMawrie]

That's how non Americans say it

[@TTVOhMiffy]

That wasn't very Christmassy

[@thoocas]

Was he reciting this or reading from a teleprompter?

[@dans5916]

Can we live in Christmasland full time please?

[@lewis72]

Robins do not have enough power.

[@HammerDownUnder]

I blame the Batmans (or should that be Batmen?)

[@weareallbornmad410]

UK could use some genocidal guilt, to be honest.

[@troymcclure8851]

5/10

[@upwardgaming9311]

This is not a Mitchell rant, this is not even close to his best ones. This is David on a lead, tied back and muzzled. Disappointing

[@thewerewolff7248]

still funny tho

[@i5m1thy]

Agreed. This pales compared to the amount of hard truths that he works into his normal comedy.

[@littlewoodimp]

He's being 'nice' ... for christmas ... that's very christmassy. And out of fear drawing the ire of the dark side of the christmasland folks of course!

[@haroldkane9714]

Jeremy would not approve

[@the0point]

Um, no mention of Brexit. Good luck.

[@thelewisridout]

This first aired in 2011

[@the0point]

@@thelewisridout I still think he could have predicted Brexit and warned us.

[@livb6945]

Now don't you start

[@brendanmccabe8373]

England doesn’t have genocidal guilt? That explains a lot.

[@apexgym6515]

Were you a teacher? This is random as hell, but I think you taught me English years ago.

[@brendanmccabe8373]

apexgym oh Jesus I’m useless at English it couldn’t be me 🤣🤣

[@nightwinghunter]

Smuggy Smuglinson.

[@groMMit1981]

Pretty poor for Mitchell, either he is old and happy with them yuumy baps at home or he truly loves Christmas, minus the retail side of things of course

[@fossrampant5826]

He's doing material written for him to read on a Michael McIntyre Christmas special. Of course it's going to be anodyne. What were you expecting?

[@redrackham6812]

What are "yuumy baps"?

[@groMMit1981]

@@redrackham6812 Do an image search for his wife

[@redrackham6812]

@@groMMit1981 I know what his wife looks like. I have seen Victoria Coren Mitchell on the internet. I still don't know what "yuumy baps" are. Is it a reference to some part of her body? Perhaps two parts?

[@groMMit1981]

@@redrackham6812 Connect!

[@lippypongstockings8356]

I love David Mitchell but I HATE this. I was wondering very recently “does David Mitchell do stand up?”. The answer is “no”. Nor anything approaching it.

[@AD-kv9kj]

As lame and standard as this bit is, I'm more disappointed that Mitchell would go on a Michael McIntyre show at all. Anything for money I guess.

[@linzearth]

Australians have no guilt. We started nothing and still helped yous out . Uh yea and we said sorry to the Aboriginals for invading and building stuff. Ya see that wasn't us what done that anyways it was you lot again. See, guilt free Aussie.

[@richtheunstable3359]

Linz Earth Aussies in the UK seem to be full of ancestral guilt. If you ever mention Australia day to one expect a massive guilt laden rant.

[@MonkeyBusinessMan]

But it’s gotta be a positive that your ancestors came there and built stuff? I mean that’s very kind. Go to someone elses backyard and fix everything. What a nice gesture. Thanks brits for building Australia!

[@linzearth]

@@richtheunstable3359 Oh , yup your right . I forgot to mention Tasmanian's. As they are not part of the mainland we tend to overlook them. Keep this on the down low , but they have been very naughty and have killed all the natives. When Canberra heard about this they sentenced lots of them to transportation back to the UK.

[@Chris-i0i0i0]

Australians should feel guilty about one thing... AQI. Possibly the most annoying habit in the world. 😋

[@lino2495]

Not funny. Too scripted

[@maxmarks3503]

It's a prepared script, of course it's scripted? Would you rather he just made something up on the spot?

[@bigfan1041]

Genocidal guilt? For what?

[@umeshdeshmukh771]

Maybe happened during colonial empire..

[@Chris-i0i0i0]

They slaughtered humour.

[@Chris-eb6yd]

David Mitchell is very hard to stomach. His ranting is grating at best, he's sort of a comedian lite and here he is on Michael ruddy McIntyre for goodness sake. Is there a light entertainment show he won't do?

[@Chris-eb6yd]

@Terncote it's January 1st and anyway it's you with the humour deficiency if you find this bland tripe amusing.

[@AC-hm8mw]

I don't find this particularly funny, but I disagree that 'David Mitchell is very hard to stomach' In fact I disagree with all of your comment.

[@Chris-eb6yd]

@@AC-hm8mw you disagree that David Mitchell is on Michael McIntyre? Pretty sure he is mate

[@AC-hm8mw]

Wow that's petty. You know exactly what I mean and I really am not going to waste my time with you.

[@AC-hm8mw]

We can all have our opinions, it's just unfortunate that people like you force theirs on other people.

[@royburston8120]

Typical unfunny modern comedy 😴

[@markmacdonald2460]

not funny anymore.....

[@kinsmed]

And yet here you are. I don't see any of YOUR uploaded comedy content...

[@leocodi]

Yes. He is. Still

[@cameronw3159]

Tell that to his net worth!

[@daisugoi]

@@kinsmed you don't need to be a comedian uploading videos to judge comedy as an audience member or viewer. That's a little stupid.

[@kinsmed]

@@daisugoi Yes, you do. You wouldn't have an accountant do your surgery.

[@raylv6962]

Funny guy! It's just a shame that he thinks it is OK to insult 17.4 million people with his total contempt for UK democracy, as well as his smug, self satisfied, left wing ideas. When are these celebs going to just shut up and let the rest of us lead a normal and prosperous life outside the UK

[@CharalamposKoundourakis]

He is a citizen aswell. Sharing his opinions is his right. Celebrity status not withstanding.

[@seanmacuaiteir437]

Let the rest of you lead a life outside the UK? Lol, brexiteers, not sure what you're leaving still?

[@DontKloppMeNow]

One thing us brits have always been good at is being able to laugh at ourselves. A joke at someones expense is still no more than a joke. Those unable to take such a joke need to take a long hard look at themselves.

[@thewerewolff7248]

as one of my favourite cartoon characters once said "kid, you're taking life waaaay too seriously!".

[@rollespil1000]

You want to leave the UK and lead a "normal and prosperous life", but Mitchell has trapped you somehow? If you're in the dungeon below his house, I think it's silly of him to let you use the internet.