Decluttering My Messy Autistic Brain (Mental Clutter and Executive Function)

[@MyLittleMagneton]

Programmer here. I write EVERYTHING down on post-its. Not necessarily for the reason most people do it, I do it mainly so my brain knows that it's recorded, which makes it easier to let go of the information. And if there's something very important I need to remember, I'll simply stick it in a place where it's impossible to miss, like the middle of my monitor. Piles of notes build up over time, and every other week or so, I'll go through it all and throw away what's done or no longer relevant (usually 95%). Very satisfying.

[@felixyoghurt3291]

Retired analyst programmer here. I used to do this with PostIt notes and if they hang around too long, then I'd move them into KeyNote (can be found on Sourceforge sourceforge.net/projects/keynote-newfeat/). It gives you peace of mind that if you need to revisit that info. / item then it can be quickly retrieved. I had a tab for "to Do", "Registrations", "To Buy", "Contacts", "Renovation" etc... Also included the Keynote file in my pc backup. There are many other organisers like Keynote, I used it as it came with no nags or strings attached.

[@1337flite]

That's intersting I work in IT operations mainly with Linux and infrastructre like servers, storage, networks in the datacenter. I find that if I write something down even if it is illegible I will remember it, often by remembering the act of writing it down and what I wrote (the illegible scrribble). Sometime I will only remember that I wrote it down, but if I look at the illegible scriblle I'll know what it means and therefore remember. Recording it in electonic form e.g. Apple Notes, Notepad , Vi text file also works, but not as well. Its like the act of recording somewhere outside my head seems to help me remember in my head. I think my brain is wired to work on verbal symbols or maybe symbols generally. When I was tested as part of a workers comp claim my verbal intelligence fell in to the range of the top 2% of the population. With song I love them for the lyrics as much as the music and I love word games like punning. I assume that this verbal bent of my brain is why writing stuff down or to a lesser extent typing helps me remember stuff. I wonder @Scias and @Felix Yoghurt if you are both very verbally oriented.

[@offthebrand]

Yes!!! This works for me too!

[@felixyoghurt3291]

@@1337flite I'm not sure abt. the verbal. I could never rely on writing much down because when really busy, my handwriting turned to custard and I could barely read it later. When I started work there was no concept of autism, but suspect I am somewhere on the scale. When coding one needs to have an affinity for language and I had no issues there. A colleague had mentioned that I think differently and an ex boss was impressed with my bent for detail. When I first started coding back in the day, it was in assembler as I had originally trained as an electronics technician then restudied in computer science. In my last years of working when Agile became the flavour of the day, I came to despise and hate it. The scrum master was a narcissist of note and I felt we were being manipulated, devalued and sidelined. I saw quite a few contractors fired or walk out in that time due to his hissy fits. Working in a corporate company was also an issue, I just could not buy into all the corporate spin and puffed up ego's and having to rate colleagues and your boss. It was like walking a tight rope, one word wrong and it always seemed to blow back at assessment time. The narc boss however took it very seriously and for the life of me I could never understand why so much time was wasted on doing those ridiculous SurveyMonkeys that only focused on a few behaviours. For me I saw much more in a person than just doing ratings to stupid questions as whether I agree or disagree and to what extent "the leadership is communicating their key values" etc.

[@theodorealenas3171]

@@1337flite I have a directory called notes with files of just 2-5 lines of text. I know that's a waste of space, but on the command line cat ~/notes/wifi just tells me what I want. I know it's a bit irrelevant but I wanted to say it.

[@andreabuntpercy]

After meditation or a really good night's sleep, I've been taught priority items will often show up in the proper order of their own accord and with a lot less struggle and anxiety. It means I have to let go of the idea that using my brain as a data bank is a good thing. That's hard for someone who's always lived in her head. But on the other hand, it works! I'm 73 now, energy is waning, so anything that eases the flow of life has to be on my radar.

[@m2the]

Yes I've had that experience with meditation and good sleep too

[@kariannefimland1475]

good sleep is so important. and also at times elusive. too much in my head and sleep will be difficult. but writting things down and braindumping really help me. (even if I can't always read my own handwriting for all the things I write down quickly late at night 🤣)

[@Hippowdon121]

Yes, right? My priorities and goals arise naturally when I rest well and stop avoiding myself. Those goals become much more fulfilling, too.

[@anish.wijesinghe]

I never understood this part of me. I would become so overwhelmed that I'd disappear and go into a manic state of organizing the most useless things. Then try to explain it to everyone. This was helpful.

[@tbbivi]

so relatable! to declutter I love writing stuff down either in a journal or as little notes in my notion page - where I basically build myself a second brain that does the storing so my brain doesnt have to :) I also set reminders there for things I want to be reminded of :)

[@nealwells5388]

Hello, this is how my brain works. First the act of writing it down tells my brain that the information is safe, if it is important it gets filed in the (hopefully) correct place. The less important stuff is in the second brain all safe. I use reminders and prompts to pick up things I need to do. Sometimes I will suddenly remember there is something that really needs to be done, but I am in the middle of a task - do I stop and write it down or continue on with the task in hand? Normally I continue as it is too much effort to restart, then when I have finished I go what was it I had to do? .......... No it has gone! It may be in the pile Paul was talking about but I can't find it!!! It has not been filed properly. This is far worse since I was diagnosed with depression and I am 57 ( currently self diagnosed but awaiting assessment). Neal

[@Dedo70]

I definitely can relate to having a cluttered brain. my problem with letting things go is that processing seems so (embarrassingly) slow to get my thoughts back in order to communicate those thoughts when I need them again.

[@cmtm5108]

You're worried you won't be able to retrieve it again later, so you hold onto it mentally? You could record it somewhere that's easy for you to access later on. Any tool that's easy to get in and out of that you know you're more likely to use

[@Emily-jx8em]

Exactly.

[@scotnick59]

A cluttered brain which tends to ruminate to giddy heights...

[@alanguest1979]

Sometimes I have so many ideas going through my head, but when I want to write them down - they suddenly go away!

[@kariannefimland1475]

some phones have a function in the notes, where you can "talk in" your ideas and it will type them into your notes as you talk. then you just need to look over them afterwards and correct for anything that was way off in meaning. :) = gamechanger go into notes and look for the mic symbol ;)

[@elizabethCorkins83]

Same. Usually I forget, But, maybe make videos, or even voice recording on ur phone, or get an app just for that, But then it's just another thing do remember lol... So yeah, just have ur default voice recording app on ur phone easy to get to maybe... Then later, maybe u can write it down, listen to ur recording & write down what's important... Hugz

[@finflwr]

I've developed a strategy of using a bullet journal to dump ideas, thoughts and to do list. And a regular practice of positive focus, mindfulness and observing my thoughts. Together this helps me create a slowing down and better feeling space in my mind, which in turn increases executive function and overall calmness/happiness. Takes practice, but oh so worth it. Took me two years to properly learn just the bullet journalling, and I've meditated for years now. I would definitely recommend. It's eliminated or reduced several of the co-morbidities I was having like ocd, insomnia, social anxiety and frequent massive meltdowns.

[@inawoodenhouse]

This whole video is a big mood. I'm trying to go through a period of declutter right now, but it is TOUGH. The letting go and deciding that something is even OK to let go is the hardest part. What if it becomes useful to me in the future? What if I will finally have time to complete the ideas I have and I'll need this for that? It's really a challenge.

[@kariannefimland1475]

such a challenge. if you have the space, I find putting things in "letting go bins" (I use the cardboard box that you buy bulk printer paper in) and then labeling them with the start date and the end date. new box started 1st of may 2022. and when it is full of things I am letting go or archiving I put the date I "sealed the lid" and I archive it. I then know that I am able to go back to the box with the time frame I know I put something in there, but if I haven't needed to open the box I can just throw the whole thing away after XX amount of time. how long depends on what the box contains. boxes of decluttering papers from my office may need to be archived for 2 years, in case something from accounting got in the wrong place, whereas a box from another room maybe only needs to be archived for 6 months. it is kind of like letting go in stages. sorting once for a few catagories #1)get rid of, maybe #2) may be useful #3) may need to reference and so on. #4) keep and cherish. I feel I could talk about this topic at length 😁😂

[@adapederson6159]

@GracieM Excellent point!! ❤️🙏

[@MmeGherkin]

I hear you! I recently made a rule for myself, if I haven't touched it in a year (especially 2), it's gone.

[@matthewsommerville88]

Recent diagnosed at 34. This makes a lot of sense why my job has been so distressful. Working in disorganized places makes it so hard to discern important info from garbage info. I can’t start important stuff because I need to file in my pc literally every little detail imparted to us from every corner of the organization. This is enlightening beyond words

[@fatimaallawati947]

BIG PROBLEM I have never heard someone talking about this before So thank you for talking about it:))) U made my day

[@boostbeetle]

This is something I need, desperately and immediately. I wish I had sought out this channel before this past weekend.

[@seajelly2421]

The more I learn about autism spectrum - from AS folks - the less I understand the distinction between AS and ADHD. I'm (labeled) ADHD, but I just received a lot of clarity about my own 'operating system' from the presenter and the commenters. How wonderful to encounter some kindred brains. Thank you.

[@m2the]

I used to tell people I had filing cabinets in my mind where I could store information. Probably seemed weird but people also noticed my memory is really good. Consequently, letting go is really hard because the info feels so high fidelity and that makes prioritizing very difficult. I guess I should run everything through a top -down prioritization filter when info is coming in. Also limit external input manually by not checking email, like you said, or going into meditation and time out mode.

[@MmeGherkin]

I've explained my brain the same way....a nice, tidy, clean room with a gazillion files cabinets in them. These file cabinets have everything in them from how to scan a document to email to the lyrics of Warren G's "Regulate". LOL

[@lisaweinmeyer5782]

I just found out that in order to be a part of a live chat I must be able to listen and type...at the same time. That, for me, is impossible. However, I will tune in live any way. The video about decluttering is really important. For instance, as an artist I have had a lot of ideas, and gathered materials of all kinds. The truth is some of these ideas didn't work, but I have all the materials. Now I am prioritizing my ideas and concentrating on keeping the materials I will use. Same can be said for the mind...and the heart.

[@markar6395]

This is so true of me at the moment. Years of accumulated info that is weighing me down and impacting in evwey way. I am seldom diagnosed asd and awaiting an assessment. This video is another confirmation of my own diagnosis

[@everyone8043]

Yes! So much to do! I think I'll take a nap.

[@NothingByHalves]

I find myself being a bit of a hoarder in every area of my life and right now I am in the process of decluttering again. I also have a touch of Inattentive type ADHD. I struggle with too much visual noise and love creating efficient systems where everything is easy to find and everything has a place. Making decisions on what to wear, what to eat, random tasks, is exhausting. I have taken to using whiteboards (five of them) to map out my ideas but haven't yet worked out a system to stop writing multiple lists. I am very afraid of letting go of things but need to have more trust that the material things (or the bright ideas) will show up at the right time. I especially liked what you said about finding things in your ideas box that you'd written 12 months before. The more we can relax, the easier it is for things to show up.

[@turtleanton6539]

Right

[@waitwhat.2767]

Thank you so much for your videos. It's so refreshing to have practical applications rather than listening to a non Autistic person trying to explain what I already know, with zero advice.

[@Worrelpa]

Totally relatable. I work in an area where change is constant.keeping up with my tasks, planning and prioritising is a struggle. Glad to know it is not just me and some techniques to try.

[@nickletchford]

This is my life every morning. My strategy most days is to start the day sending an email to myself. I find that helps dump all the clutter ‘stream of consciousness’ into a place and then the important stuff I can highlight and identify and then try to do one at a time

[@kariannefimland1475]

yes. brilliant :)

[@nickletchford]

Unfortunately this doesn’t help with objects It’s a useful tool for mental clutter but the fact I haven’t thrown anything away since I was a child has become a very difficult hurdle (including all the physical notes I wrote before email.)

[@josephmartin1540]

Exactly. I try to do the same things, but ADHD compromises my ability to remember to not pick up things I’ve dropped… working memory is pretty poor. My executive function has “gone in the tank.” I am pulling for you to grow better and better at this! It is harder to learn these things when older… BUT we keep trying! Oh, and the idea box: I purge mine possibly too often. Any de cluttering is worth it! This video makes sense (FINALLY!) of having the heart of a minimalist and the actions of a hoarder! Thanks for your valuable voice and work!

[@jackwelter9529]

Extremely relatable. I have to do lists and notes on my phone for the stuff that's important to remember, and an online journal where I dump out any thoughts that are really just taking up space. I even made a separate folder in it labeled "stress dump" where I can drop stuff that I need to vent about somewhere but don't want to be reminded of every time I pull up the journal in general. It's amazing how much it helps sometimes just to write something out somewhere (even if it's just a few words to help trigger the thought again later as opposed to any sort of detail) just so I can say "look, brain, there it is in external storage, you can delete it from active memory now"

[@EmberShadowtempest]

I am autistic and am recovering from extreme memory loss. When I first realized I was losing information I tried to grasp onto it and chain it down in my mind and that just caused anxiety and becoming overwhelmed easily. Clearing that clutter as you described filing what info I do have neatly or just recognising that it's there whether I can access it or not has helped. Though I recognise this will be a life long process for me decluttering and refocusing.

[@BuckitOfSean]

Wow I totally relate. I think that (rarely) the clutter makes me forget something urgent and important as well. I have a few embarrassing stories relating to preparing performance materials or space, when I and others have asked "how could you possibly have forgotten THAT?" Its good to know the reasons behind these difficulties, because there is a lot of shame to deal with otherwise.

[@kariannefimland1475]

the shame is the worst. almost like there is often the elusive "forget one thing......and it just happens to be super important"........ worst feeling. by best advice, is have an outside person (or an alarm) that can ask if that "one thing" is done. My husband has helped me a lot with this. and a million alarms on my phone. :)

[@BuckitOfSean]

@@kariannefimland1475 Thanks for your thoughts! Do you mean you literally reference "that one thing" in the alarm or reminder request, and it triggers you to scan your mind for things that could have been forgotten? Just want to understand correctly :) glad that's working for you! I use alarms for a lot of things as well so I'm sure this could help.

[@kariannefimland1475]

@@BuckitOfSean Sometimes if is is something specific that I need to remember I will put the information clearly in the alarm like for example for remembering to put out the trashcans for pickup I have an alarm the night before " trashcans outside!" or something like that. And given the same example I will also put it as an "event" in my calender with my husband "invited" so that he also see the same event and get a reminder. He is NT and has good memory, but it helps him as well. For other things, where maybe he would not know exactly what I need to remember he will just ask me if there is something I need to remember and that will help me remember. Also I use skype specifically for sharing with my husband what I need to remember. And that way we can reference. He is my biggest support with my memory issues. Sometimes it is enough for him to ask "did you remember everything you needed to do today?" before a set time. (so there is still time to do the "thing" if I actually still have forgotten). This reminder will be enough to remember to check my notes and then I see if I have gotten through it all :) And when I actually forget, I try and give myself grace. :)

[@BuckitOfSean]

@@kariannefimland1475 thanks for the breakdown! Having the gut-check together sounds like a good ritual to close up the day!

[@babybirdhome]

I realized this myself over the last few years. After watching this video, the approach that I’ve been using lately has been “write it down or write it off”. What finally made me comfortable enough with that is that I’ve had plenty of valuable thoughts over the course of my life, and I realized that that doesn’t seem to stop happening even when I’ve forgotten most of them. What this means is that those things are coming from somewhere whether I remember them or not so I’ve decided that if I let go of something that might be valuable later, I’ll probably generate it again or something similar enough again at that time, so I don’t worry about losing it if I just write it off now so that I can be productive and get done what I need to get done. If what I’m considering throwing out seems like it may have more value, then I just write it down so it’s recorded and organized and I can access it again later from that record by referencing some other thing that I’ve associated it with when I file it away. I always pepper in a mixture of contextual cues, too, so that even if I can’t remember exactly what it was that I need, I’m more likely to stumble across it later when I’m looking for it. So far this has been serving me well. I was also able to justify it by realizing just how many “good things” I know that I’ve forgotten over the years and yet I still get by just fine. That’s made it easier to do. It seems to be working, but I wish I had started this many years ago so that I’d be a lot better at it now and would have already developed better strategies for using it in my daily life. But at least I have it now. I’ve also taken on scheduling a periodic review of efficacy so that I can make adjustments to things that aren’t working by comparing them to other strategies I’ve used in the past, and new ideas that are currently in my head for what might make them work better. But it’s important to schedule those things or I don’t do it, and then I lose that value and just think to myself later “I should schedule this and do it regularly, that way I can keep improving over time by measuring my results and making adjustments…” and so on, ad infinitum. If this doesn’t work, then at some point, that’s the realization I’ll come to and I’ll make an appropriate change. Until then, this is better than what I did before with keeping the clutter and paralyzing myself with constant overload.

[@ramona1555]

Writing thoughts down and store them physically/digitally helps me sometimes to declutter my brain.

[@lisadesertwoman5213]

Yes. This is exactly what I’ve dealt with for many years. Well, always. Glad you talked about it.

[@shawnholbrook7278]

Oh my gosh, you are speaking my language. 1st, I have to do Bible study every morning so that I can be calm and ready to think without racing around like the energizer bunny. 2nd, I accidentally do 'shut down and reboot' times, it takes away minutes or hours, but it works. My counselor has challenged me to do morning mindfulness exercises daily. It looks exactly what I do, but intentional and consistent instead of accidental . I call it percolating. Staying in a relaxed area, doing nothing in particular or looking through colours, textures, or feelings and properties of things while being totally in my body. My thoughts can wander and bubble up anything important or stressful or peaceful without pressure. Not running or chewing thoughts, just simmering or washing them away. I used to do this unintentionally on my days off, and be upset that I lost or wasted time, even though part of me knew that it was how my brain could cope with always being "on" and always being alert. Now, I am grateful that my brain and body was already trying to do what I need to do after Bible study everyday. This way, I can percolate, or shut down and reboot on purpose, like pressure guages and general (necessary) maintenence. If I percolate, and process things, they don't nag me or distract me. Some things get recognized as important and integral and true to my values. Other things are flagged as spam or faulty programming or filters and gets washed out. Even some troubles get reframed. They are a part of why I am me, but they are not me or everything that I am. (Gosh, I hope that made sense.) I am so happy that you put these videos out, and that you speak and diagram things in a way that I can understand. Um, I also used to write, I am planning on writing again, but I have had a stupid illness that crushed my brain for a while. I am learning how to draw and think and clean again, I am just having to prioritize what I can realistically, actually accomplish in this phase of healing. It's kind of funny that I can't overextend or overtax my limits and resources anymore. I have to make choices. 🙂

[@stefanmargraf7878]

Exact description of myself! Not only the brain, but also started, but unfinished projects around me. Thank you for your advice. I will try it.

[@darrelltregear3571]

Same hear

[@mike-williams]

THis underscores some recent writing from Tony Attwood on the problem of attention in ASD/ADHD people, in some cases it's deficits, and in other cases it's a surfeit. My brain has a bit of a case of FOMO for any bit of interesting information, so I've had to develop strategies for decluttering my mental inbox. I've spent the last 7-8 years working for public sector institutions who are quite undisciplined (OK some are chaotic) in the way they store, share and otherwise manage files on their computer systems. This leads to an analogous dysfunction of hundreds of people whose amygdalas are so fried that they can't attend to proper decision making. I've made a number of attempts to rectify these situations as my ASD brain is good at piercing the chaos, triaging and re-organising the content, but it's amazing how much hostility is encountered from senior managers while trying to do this.

[@offthebrand]

I store nearly everything externally of myself so all I need to remember is how to find it in the real world. To do lists are in my phone in one place. My phone calendar holds all my appointments and reminders. Ideas and goals are written down on post-its where I can see them and I tuck away little jokes and momentos to flip through when I feel like it. I can't store it inside my head so I store it outside :)

[@mewhitoh]

100%, you spoke what I live, inside & out. I call myself an information hoarder. Both physical- phone and computer weighed down by files I'll never look or look for again-and mental. I would rather toss it all, and I can actually do that sometimes. But more often than not, I take a peek at 1 tiny, innocent thing from what I'm trying to get rid of, and all of a sudden, everything's all too meaningful to ever let go.

[@Aiken47]

Thanks Paul, a lot of creators are able to add a Thankyou button so we can give you some coffee money if we are able. I use lists if I’m feeling like thoughts or tasks are going to slip out of my memory. I also have a ‘creative’ brain so my kitchen table is dedicated to holding all of the current stuff I’m either going to use soon or don’t want to lose, it’s a mess but I know what’s there.

[@bc4198]

Notebooks or boxes of ideas turn us into quirky geniuses instead of absent-minded dreamers. I used to worry more about it being a crutch, but I'm learning to view that better through an ability positivity lens. My family have figured out I'm happy to write stuff down for them, and then they won't forget it either :) I'm a big fan of Second Brain / Zettelkasten note taking concepts. Obsidian is my app of choice, and I bet a lot of you would like it. At work especially, I live and die by To-do lists on spreadsheets, where I can set priority levels, quickly reorder things when new info comes in, and hide completed tasks without losing the record. I dream of using a satisfying app, but none tick the boxes reliably enough to switch from Excel. BaseCamp and Flow-E are promising, though. In the meantime, I made a template that lets me track all the high level stuff, then use a separate one for details within each of those projects. My hope for the app is to make those items link and flow together... And I'm neurodivergent, so I'll learn to make it myself if I have to :D

[@simonanardi4312]

OMG i feel you… and same thing goes for physical stuff piling on the actual desks of my home and workplace… The courage of letting go

[@safyafarooq2878]

I can relate to what you are saying Paul. Difficult to preoritize. Everything seems important. Often I spend days where I am doing and doing, but at the end it seems that nothing is done. I would like to do just one thing at the time. It is such a stress to handle many things at the time. I get very confused and take a while to switch tasks. I have a remarkable memory for some details, but often forget things to do, or appointments. I have the feeling that I just "wurschtel mich durchs Leben". Sorry, I don't know how to say that in Englisch. Maybe just "getting by" or something. And again: What if neurotipicals have similar eashues, but don't care so much about it. I mean maybe the problem is just our perception. As Autistic person you are kind like stuck in your self. So our self awareness is highly self relating. Maybe lacking the correct judgemand about ourselfes because difficulty understanding others and therefore no comparison and no good understanding. It is said that God created in oppesites, warm and cold, light and dark, peace and war, health and siknes..... So that in comparison we should get understanding. It's just unripe thoughs. Don't bather Paul. Take care of you. Greatings to your wife, my country fellow.

[@cani.j]

I can relate completely. And I want to add something: I would also call this mental clutter "The Path to ADHD".

[@oaschbeidl]

"Todoist" is my number 1 tool for decluttering. Everything I need to do, I write down in there, including the day I plan on doing it and I get a to-do list for every day that I can just work through. It also does recurring tasks, I can sort it into different projects, etc. I've gotten a bunch more productive since I've started using that app. I also try to write down every important bit of information I'll need down the line and am getting better at keeping all that stuff organized outside of my brain. Turns out there's a bunch of stuff taking up unnecessary RAM space in my brain that I can easily outsource, I just have to work out a good system for it all so nothing slips through the cracks.

[@SirBoden]

The thing that clogs up my executive function is other peoples emotional noise. When I encounter someone in distress who I care about it hijacks most of my bandwidth. I want to help but since I know I’m likely to say the wrong thing it clogs up my system.

[@rebeccahatfield]

Thank you for putting words to something I couldn’t. I try and hang on to everything so I won’t forget and it is overwhelming!!!

[@imtheeternalscholar]

I have found that writing everything down in a notebook, planner or such helps me to just get it all out so that I can sort it when I have free time to do this. Some of the ideas are implemented, some are just left on the list. But if I don’t write them down, it ends up annoying the crap out of me till I get it on paper.

[@glennchugg6015]

I find if I make physical lists of my ideas (for example) I am able to remove them from my brain and just remember I have a list written about 1 topic... I use google keep so I have access from all devices. works a treat, if it's relevant to a date I'll add a reminder or alarm on my phone so that I can be prepared when I need such information.

[@polinalikhosherstova7627]

Thank you!) I just realized what making me overwhelmed in my freelance work life and why I felt more focused in my office work (you don't have to clutter ideas 😅 - just do your thing)

[@user-eg8ht4im6x]

I can relate a lot to this. I have learnt to write stuff down, I have a note pad in a propionate place, that I can see as I walk into my most used room. When I think of something I should do, or need to remember, I write it down there and then. It helps, it’s not fail safe, but it’s a good way of not having to try and keep remembering what I need to remember. It took a lot of effort to start with the disciplining myself to write things down, now I’ve formed a habit and is a part of how I ‘work’. I also put nots in key areas to remember to do things, like a note on the doormat to remember to take something with me when I go out the door!

[@xrisdio]

Today I received my official diagnosis of ASD after 18 months waiting for an assessment on the NHS. I cannot stress how priceless your videos have been during this time, helping me understand my own struggles and traits. You are creating such an invaluable resource and I hope your videos go around the world a few times, helping others understand themselves.

[@teddymercury-wm1qu]

I absolutely relate to you on every front here... thank you so much for sharing this.

[@LandonCook]

Wow!!! This video is so dang relatable to me!!!! I feel like you said my exact way of thinking but I’ve never been able to articulate it this well.

[@lindaj5492]

😳 This resonates so much with me! Squirrel / hoarder, procrastinator, duplicator, avoider, displacer, misplacer, forgetter, butterfly-brain, mental pinball machine - all terms that apply to me. Also starting several tasks simultaneously in the misguided hope that this will motivate me to get them ALL done today 🙄. Sometimes - when there’s nothing especially important to get done, I quite enjoy just letting my mind wander and watching the curious tangents and connections that emerge. (Edit: meant to say “thank goodness for smartphones” - I use calendar, reminders & alarms for important stuff I have to remember)

[@michellelabelle3048]

Recently diagnosed. I work as a scientist. My supervisor loves that I record meticulous notes on our work board.

[@stevezozuk9622]

I don't know what to say anymore.. every single video I have watched of yours...rings a giant bell in my life . I'm in complete awe of how correct you really are . It's kinda scary knowing the answers you have for me .

[@ilavvex]

This is a very interesting video and concept. I myself am not sure how I would go about decluttering just yet due to the fact that one thing that I end up doing is remembering "everything" friends and others tell or even talk about in my immediate vicinity. The vast majority of this information is utterly useless but stays in my brain anyways and contributing to immense amounts of random extraneous information that's just floating around waiting to be used. Granted, it comes in handy in discussions when I can remind a friend that "actually, you said this was this thing three months ago," but otherwise its just needlessly taking up space. Currently, I am self diagnosed pending a formal evaluation that I am waiting to have done hopefully in the next couple of months. I wanna say, thank you for your content since your videos were the first ones that made me realize that I very likely am autistic, and I finally have an explanation for so many things in my life.

[@kariannefimland1475]

cool. I wish I could remember better what was said. I have this type of memory too, but for visual things. things I read, see and so on. anything spoken doesn't always still. but music lyrics stay..... go figure.

[@ilavvex]

I tend to be able to do the same with visual things such as when reciting something, I can visualize where it was on the page I read it from. Music is one of those things where I literally have hundreds of whole songs in my brain, any of which may be mentally playing at any given moment, but oddly enough, lyrics are just gibberish. Strangely though, I cannot remember a face to save my life and can forget a face in a matter of seconds lol

[@kariannefimland1475]

@@ilavvex funny how the brain is sometimes. I hope you use your strengths in the best ways. :)

[@murtazaarif6507]

I came to realize this in myself too. A few years ago I started to organize my research into various topics of interest into different folders in my email account. It helped to not lose or forget things and empowered me by learning better. In other ways, sound meditation really helps me to stop the ongoing domino effect of the build-up of thoughts as well.

[@bonce]

I use the concepts of 'Getting Things Done', rely on the fact that brain memory is not where these things should be stored so keeping a collection of permanent storage for everything that needs it, then a simple master list of what needs to be done right now, fed by other transient lists.

[@raz0rh00f]

Also a big fan of Getting Things Done - List your values, capture info, file the captures away once a week.

[@MNkno]

You've Been Looking At My Desks (and desktops, and file cabinets)!! Having 2 children expanded my initial skills sets - I can throw a mental switch and not prioritize, but do something closer to battleground triage. One of the better coping skills ideas was, labelling each document cache with the date it was packed up... and if I haven't looked at it in, say, 5 years, tossing it out without looking into it. I'm not really good at consistency with this, but that has helped. I need to do it some more.

[@PortiaTang]

Thank you for this! It applies so much to me. I realised that whenever I need to get something done, I brainstorm and come up with a list of things to do / resources to check out... and then I get overwhelmed by the list and feel the urge to start with the item that is quickest to complete just so I can remove it from my list ASAP. Unfortunately this usually means that I end up prioritising things that are marginal and less important, and by the time I get to the key item my stamina is spent and I end up pushing it to the next session. Now that I'm aware of it I think I just need to be more strict about keeping the initial list as short as possible.

[@TristanNavarro]

Lists and writing down priorities, 'must do' items (used to be on my palms until I started working in a library!) are absolutely necessary for me! Often I will spend breakfast just staring at my list and schedule for the day. And I don't always do it, but when I do actually write something down (a bright idea, etc.) and stuff it in a folder or on my phone notes it eases my mind. I know it's there if I need it, but can let it not take up brain space.

[@a-cvs1403]

Got my diagnosis in January. My doc said that i might not be able to work anymore in a few years because I've been working 40h/week and not getting enough time to regenerate from the sensory issues let alone the mental clutter. Got my cancer diagnosis on 1.april (yeah i know) very treatable btw and chemo sucks, but it's actually been a blessing in a very awful disguise. Finally I can clean up the mental clutter I have kept for years. I am still at it btw. Tip for those of you who don't have their diagnosis yet: don't hesitate in getting one and fight for it. Thanks to the diagnosis I was able to get a single room in the hospital without much fuss. Soooo many meltdowns and inner crisis avoided.

[@eliandjasontry5378]

Your mind is like my mind. I get exactly what you’re saying. Thank you.

[@sanamdevine339]

Wow, your analogies are so helpful. Thank you!

[@coriemaedark]

Struggling with this my whole life in a big, paralyzing way. A few coping skills I've learned... It's gotten much easier having an app where I can make lists and organize the things I feel I shouldn't forget but don't really need in the present moment. (I love Notion and the free version gives me everything I need. The desktop version is much easier to work with.) But more importantly, I'm finally accepting the mindset of trusting that the things I need to recall will be recalled when needed or that I'll cross paths with whatever it is again when it's the right time. Kind of letting go of the compulsion to remember and keep track of everything, being constantly overwhelmed with it all, and replacing that frantic mindset with a more laid-back concept that it'll show up when it's needed. I'm just trying to trust myself, timing, and the universe (or whatever you want to call it) more. Letting go of false control. And even trying to accept the concept that if things are lost, forgotten, missed opportunities, etc, then it wasn't meant to be. To further lower my stress levels from all the things in my brain, I'm also working on adopting actually just taking care of whatever it is in the moment if it will take 10 minutes or less. I so often have a very long list of things to do, which spirals me into burnout and nothing gets done, but if it's a small thing, now I try to just do it, and then I don't have it floating around in my thoughts.

[@peachynectar]

omg I have this exact problem to the point I've become aware of it myself already and here you are talking about it!

[@relentlessrhythm2774]

Daily to do lists are a must for me.

[@LoyalMJfan]

That’s why I have a ‘command centre’ 😊 It’s a board with everything I need to remember as in menu, groceries, schedule, chores even ongoing projects so that if everything is written down my brain is decluttered and focused. Yes, I couldn’t love without the yellow post it’s they are lifesavers 😉

[@JonathanArcher100]

Actually I felt that way in the past and the way I decluttered my brain is writing post-its, so that I can free space in my brain. They are on the wall, so the information is there if needed. I also prioritize them in 3-4 layers, so I know which ones need to be addressed immediately and which ones can be delayed. Zero cluttering issues since then 💯

[@markh9194]

I kind of relate to the concept however my memory is awful and I tend to forget the important things and just remember the junk that I don't need, or maybe there is so much junk there is no space for the important things... I like the sound of your ideas box, not sure I have the EF to write down things as I think of them though... Just getting through the day without having a melt down or loosing my 5hit is a win at the moment. Thanks for sharing, have a good one!

[@steveneardley7541]

I organize information in computer files--thinking carefully about what a file will contain and what it should be called. This allows me to forget about it, without feeling I have lost it. Appointments and things like that go on a calendar, not on my computer. I recently found a pile of printouts of academic articles that I was studying 30 years ago. I am suddenly very interested in this topic again, and glad that I didn't throw all that stuff out. On the other hand, I routinely get rid of books that "I will never read again."

[@cannymoose]

You have spoken to my soul. As i have got older i have more info horded, online and also in my head..and sometimes in the physical world too. The physical stuff i put it into black sacks b4 xmas and if its still in the shed untouched a few years later i get someone else to put it in the bin.

[@petertragardh4571]

I discovered GTD - Getting Things Done. A book by David Allen. It is also a methodology. It declutters my mind by making me dump everything, yes everything into a filing system. I use a digital, but a paper based is equally good. Now I no longer have to remember everything. Or rather, anything. The system does that for me. All I have to do is to look through it periodically and rediscover things I have to do. Or put a date/ time notification on it, if that is a priority. I hightly recommend this. It changed my life. If you are like me and don't like reading, there are tons of Allens videos on KZbin. Or listen to the audio book. Or all of the above.

[@sallyjom-cooper470]

Lists are amazing I blast down everything then number or resort the categories

[@avgdrummer]

I have this clutter problem both figuratively and literally.

[@avgdrummer]

@@Rollwithit699 I find that physically cleaning up the messes is the best solution. Set aside a weekend, buy some large garbage bags, pick a corner and have at it. Sometimes it takes a couple passes because you end up just creating better organized piles the first time around, and don't throw away (or donate) everything that you should have. Second pass allows you to find permanent, organized homes for everything, and potentially get rid of other things that you don't really need. But yeah, the hardest part is setting aside the time and starting the seemingly impossible work. Once you get started, it should be impossible to stop until you're done or run out of time. (Maybe set up a quick lunch/dinner ahead of time.)

[@buttercxpdraws8101]

Oh yes. Exactly. So perfectly described!

[@AndRewUK24]

The computer analogy I use is my brain is I'm constantly fragmented in my brain and needs constantly defragging. I'm always using a defragmentation program in my brain to organise the information that is scattered about my brain. It is a similar analogy to the filing cabinet he uses. (I am autistic originally diagnosed as Asperger's syndrome)

[@morrows10]

When it comes to cleaning out paperwork, I put it into a box. I try to weed out junk mail and things like that. Then label the box: time, date, place, general contents. That way if I have to find one thing, I go to the box(es). I hunt through and every time I get rid of the things I know I don’t need. But I do not have a problem with boxes neatly stacked and labeled.

[@motorcyclehair]

VERY VALUABLE. THIS IS ME. I'M TAKING TWO WKS OFF AT THE END OF THIS MONTH. JUST NEED TO BUY A FILING BOX/FILES & I'm set. I used to take more time off, but since COVID--things have been screwed up as far as knowing when to take the time off.

[@mozhdehbesharatifar1999]

Thank you so much for your channel. I really love you ❤️❤️

[@bokusimondesu]

Again, thank you for explaining my brain to me!

[@chriscobb2102]

I definitely have trouble with this, often times I find myself unable to remember to eat and other important things because of it

[@adapederson6159]

WOW 😲🤣😭😩..... describes me "TO A T". My son and daughter in law did an "Intervention" with me when they helped me move about "hoarding". I had no idea at the time that it was Asperger's 🤔. Things just build up to fast, (mail and important papers for me)! This was a very eye opening video 📸.....Thank you!!

[@kacichristian]

Totally relate!!

[@lorifarmer9692]

I describe my brain as a library and every person I know has their own book and some people have multiple volumes and there's a giant table in the middle so in order to deal with a subject or a person I have to pull out that volume and put it on the table to use it Sometimes there's so many books out on the table on the floors that I can't find the book I need so I can't deal with that problem until I take time to put everything back on the shelf. I described my emotions as boxes of goo that are stacked everywhere so if my boxes of emotions get knocked over and they then "all of my books and now I can't do anything at all and unparalleled

[@kariannefimland1475]

this describes the feeling of overwhelm or too much of any emotion so well. 💖 it really is like a the "books" get messy and the abitlity to focus is just off for a while until all the books are "cleaned and reorgainzed". (basically a long break of me time with something relaxing)

[@frederikstautz5774]

u r quite amazingly reflected^^ great channel, thx muchos!!

[@timjosling9298]

Book "Getting things done" has a lot of good ideas in this area.

[@hunteur]

love you Paul!

[@funkymonkey8777]

Sooo relatable. Thanks Paul. Has anyone tried Bullet journaling Or Gtd?

[@kariannefimland1475]

"but not for it to be "pretty". "

[@JuliaBumstead]

dependent on index cards, adding new tabs to the endless files whenever an idea needs a new home.. when enough accumulate under one tab I have the bones of a new project. I’m a researcher too, so I’m constantly having ‘how to tie this to another subject’ thoughts that need to be put somewhere. I love computers but need the tangible cards to actually let anything go

[@SneakySteevy]

I am asperger and I live in Canada. My psychotherapist told me a out 2 videos to watch on youtube. « Spinoza : Complete guide to life » Spinoza is the father of the modern democracies. He is a philosopher from the 17th century and it’s easy to link what he say to our society even if its nearly 400 years later. Rationality is what he preach and learn how to deal with sad emotions. It helped me A LOT! « Expressing and receiving anger compassionately by Marshall Rosenberg » he is a psychologist who « invented » the non violent communication. He teach how to express and comprehend anger in very unique way. He also teach how to accept anger from other. Those 2 have helped me a lot and made me realize that I was focusing on my weakness more than my strength and I was rationalize it with my endless pool of reason. In other words I was rationalizing my problems and the fact that I was labeled myself as an outcast that nobody understand. It was a vicious circle.

[@octoberdawn1087]

I don't have a choice because my husband is a hoarder. I didn't know this until after we'd been together for over a year. And then it was like a slow reveal. It messes with me on every single level especially my thinking. There's nothing that I can do to help him because it's his issue. So I have found myself having to have a notebook for every single thing in my life and I can't even let my notebooks merge, otherwise I am an absolute mental mess.. That's a result of me living in somebody else's physical clutter. I have one notebook just for my resentments, that way I don't have to think about them anymore. I have another notebook for my spiritual experiences. I have a notebook for organizing groceries and dinner meals. I have a notebook for writing all my dreams down. I have one for things I'm gonna talk to my counselor about. Etc...

[@peterwynn2169]

This is me. One of the things that really puts me out is if my schedule is interrupted. I had to do something the other day and it was process driven so any attempt to interrupt me was stressful. I file so much in my brain it's not funny.

[@AurorasWindow]

I have pretty significant executive dysfunction due to both autism and adhd. I also have a very intellectually demanding job with a variety of different tasks to be done in one day. My brain is a cluttered desk and that’s how I usually describe it to other people! In fact, when I went through the evaluation process the psychologist took note of ny description and wrote about it in my report (I thought it was interesting that he thought it was relevant, now I know why 😅). I find that it helps me if I externalize the clutter buy drawing boxes in a white piece of paper and then writing the tasks I need to do inside those boxes (with steps below each box). It helps me visualizing the tasks and kinda ignoring the rest of the clutter… I do sometimes give in and use the clutter to try to focus. For example, if I’m doing a monotonous task and my brain keeps asking for stimulation in the form of “make jewelry now”, so intense that makes the clutter worse, I just give myself a few minutes (who knows how long tbh) to make jewelry and then go back to the ask. This is obviously not always possible, but helps sometimes!

[@pamelamawbey814]

I have just started a 'balls in air' folder where I put a page related to what is needing to be done. I usually have a lot of balls in the air at any one time and try to prioritise which one to catch first as it comes down by putting it in the front. As I catch each one, I remove it and put it in a 'done' folder.

[@tamberjune]

Prioritizing is really hard for me. Still trying to figure that out. A lot of my life and to dos are written out so I may see "1.clean the curtains & 2. Call the doctor for test results." I honestly have no idea which to do first and then when I try to go through the list I'm doing so many little things that I don't need to do! At least not right then, anyway. It's hard but still working on it!

[@misst1586]

I do the lists. I even write my shower, etc. Had someone think that was weird. I then number the items in order of importance. I do this everyday. Its a to do list with a to buy list on the side. I add to it thru out the day. I can tear it off and carry the to buy list with me. Since I've become disabled with my back, I will write next to the task someone's name that is coming to help me with that. Or to remind me to ask them.

[@kariannefimland1475]

I love lists. :) The trick to lists is to have one or several "running lists" that keep growing. and then have a specific list for today. also at the end of today, pick 3 items (or maybe even just ONE) that you plan on doing tomorrow. This is today's list (that you write the night before). You only focus on "today's list. if you finish the task, cross it off. at the end of the day. you look at "todays list". anything that you did not complete, you can either decide to put it on "todays list (that you are now writing for tomorrow)" or put it back onto the big running list or just "deleting" it completely. Any days where you get through the items on "todays list", you can look at your running list and do more, but you avoid the overwhelm of having "too much to get through". I find having between 1 and 3 "these need to happen today" on my "todays list" and preparing this list the night before is super helpful. (and sometimes I ask for help. I have many tasks, but what is one thing that needs to happen "today" (thinking of tomorrow). setting this ahead of time gives time to process what the plan is, and also avoids the overwhelm of where to start, because this is just planning. the "doing" gets to happen the next day. ;) hugs from Norway

[@sophierw]

Yeah, I have issues with this. Like in school I have a tendency to spend a lot of time trying to write down everything I thought of during class. The teacher wants us to learn, and I don't know in the moment what the most important thing is, so I write it all down, as much as possible. But it does end up being exhausting, since I am trying to organize the information at the same time I am writing it down, so the information enters my brain in a more organized manner. And then actually processing it is hard, so I might not even do that. And I miss some information because I am busy writing. I don't trust myself not to miss something if I only write down some of it. Sometimes this strategy works and sometimes not, but either way it is exhausting. I do the same thing with other parts of my life, but instead I talk about everything I have experienced, every little bit, or think about all of it. It is a lot. I am not sure how to let myself relax, and not worry about every little thing. At this moment I don't have a solution.

[@chrispybacon3]

Hi Paul, not sure if you have read the Sherlock Holmes stories - I found that Arthur Conan Doyle put it quite well in ‘A Study in Scarlet’: “I consider that a man's brain originally is like a little empty attic, and you have to stock it with such furniture as you choose. A fool takes in all the lumber of every sort that he comes across, so that the knowledge which might be useful to him gets crowded out, or at best is jumbled up with a lot of other things, so that he has a difficulty in laying his hands upon it. Now the skillful workman is very careful indeed as to what he takes into his brain-attic. He will have nothing but the tools which may help him in doing his work, but of these he has a large assortment, and all in the most perfect order. It is a mistake to think that that little room has elastic walls and can distend to any extent. Depend upon it there comes a time when for every addition of knowledge you forget something that you knew before. It is of the highest importance, therefore, not to have useless facts elbowing out the useful ones.”

[@sonjawld6464]

I can absolutely relate to that. I try to write everything down to get it out of my head. On every piece of paper I can find. And then the pile in my brain becomes a real pile of paper or a mess in my laptop. I can't throw it away because somewhere there is this single word, sentence or idea that is important. But it's hard sometimes to find it because I write so chaotically and fast not to forget my thoughts. And then I can't read it anymore. 😅 Haven't found a system that works for me, yet. I think, I just need people, who execute my ideas, so I don't have to constantly think about them. 😁

[@IIIspirit]

Yes I know about that problem I use LifeOS a comprehensive Notion template, and have an weekly task to see what I can sort out. It's like you said the brain, diving in deeply into everything, see's how interesting and important everything is. But to life an exuberant life I have to select consciously, otherwise I am like a racing driver who practices tennis half a day, meaning I will be someone who knows a little about everything but is a master in nothing. 😅👍

[@ravenspace]

Hahaha my exec function is so bad I wanted to watch this but I can't and I don't like waiting and I feel hounded by notifications so I don't want to turn that on ,the last vid I did that for I still haven't watched. I suspect autism but I only have formal diagnosis of ADHD and CPTSD. I'm solo parenting which I would never have taken on if I'd known how broken I was. I used to work in restaurants and hotels and there was a lot of rewarding and non threatening social interaction and 'time off' was regular and delineated. Now I'm adrift and have been sinking for years. Nobody can help and some who have tried ended up retraumatising me. My poor daughter has a permanently messy house(she is warm,loved, well fed and clean/has clean bed and clothes and read to and loved and listened to) and a mother who hates her dysfunctional self and cries every day. I had a counselor but she "doesn't do the alphabet disorders, just brain function and improving it" I left because she said I needed too much care. Now I have KZbin. Accessing mental health serv or finding advocacy for autistic people is ridiculously difficult if your exec function and trust in the world are shabby. It has taken months and many dead ends to find any help at all. I can't do it by myself and have such a hard time connecting.

[@kendrasue7265]

Only 2 months ago I had a mental health crisis. Not the first but the worst. Then I remembered that it's okay to admit I need help and also to ask for it. I am now in a supportive mental health community, state funded, with psychological and physical health appointments and treatment plans that are beyond pharmaceuticals. Remember to keep asking the right people the right questions until you get results and solutions. We are worth it and our kids and loved ones benefit too. Much love and understanding here. 🦋

[@Feminazi1dc]

Therapists aren't supposed to diagnose autism... it isn't a mental illness it's a developmental disorder. That's for a neurologist or a psychologist at best. Find an autism expert and go to them with a list of reasons why you think you're autistic.

[@kendrasue7265]

This effects my mental health. Is that just me? The 2 of my family that have seizures have neurologist, the one with autism has ABA school, the one with ADHD accommodations. But I am just fine to manage all the appointments, calendars, driving, planning, execution, people, feelings, and basic needs alone. Except, I never have been able to. Why can't I do these things? They need me to. What is wrong with me?And here we go again....embarrassing, guilt and shame. So, yeah, a little more extra help please. Especially for everyone else's wellbeing. Generations of develop mental diversities and mental disorders and don't forget the trauma.

[@Feminazi1dc]

@@kendrasue7265 autism is still a developmental disorder . I don't understand what you're asking. Talk to a therapist about your mental health issues separately, and an autism expert about getting a diagnosis if you want one.

[@kendrasue7265]

@@Feminazi1dc yes always has been always will be. Not even a hint of disagreement. Never made the statement that you're hung up on. Just sharing how important finding the best support and therapy is in addition to getting a clinical diagnosis, for me. I felt alone in this struggle and now realize I am not. I receive amazing positive inspiring hope and would like everyone to have someone caring and helpful in their lives. 🦋

[@dwyerfire]

I guess the best way for me to 'let go' of useless information is if I'm learning something I'll really learn it all the way once then only remember the key insight to the thing and forget everything else. I mean of course if it isn't important at all in the first place then you don't need to learn it... But still this helps prevent clutter too

[@ThroughTheLensOfAutism]

My brain could use decluttering, but it doesn't seem as easy for me to declutter a mind as it does any physical space. By "throw away" it seems people mean "forget", but I can not forget certain things, or certain images, or certain sounds, in my memory. I wish it was that easy to forget such things by choice.

[@cherylmoore3502]

I too can relate. Just found your videos! Going to watch "how to tell if you are autistic". I'm 73 and watched your "elderly with autism" video and found it very relatable. I've suspected my son to be on the spectrum for years. Have wondered if I should tell him my suspicions or not. He's married with a two kids but struggles with some areas. Wondering if he has inherited this from me?

[@recoveringsoul755]

I tried to tell my sister that I think I am, and that our mother was, and it's genetic. Pointed out some traits in her kids... she didn't really respond as if she heard me. Maybe if you learn an organizational skill, you could share that with your son

[@VaronPlateando]

there's usually too much to follow up upon to mitigate collision likelyhood in NT's 'world'. such that retreats aren't just an option, I guess