Deinfluencing You | How Social Media is Destroying Christian Mothers

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[@psyche8187]

I remember when I was a child, my friends’ moms were all unique. They each had their own style and personality and everyone’s home was different. Even though we lived near each other and went to the same church or school. It seems like all my kids’ friends’ mothers are indistinguishable. It’s so hard to get to know people when they all look, talk, and live the same. My fellow moms don’t seem to have unique interests, hobbies, and perspectives. I think this is another reason we’re all lonely.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Wow this is SUCH a great point! I remember that too! Everyone was so different and that’s what made it fun!

[@katie7748]

Agreed. Even their homes look the same. It's depressing, honestly.

[@allydore]

Wow this video helped put my thoughts together! God has been nudging me to take a few breaks from social media over the last year, and every time I get back on it I feel awful in every way possible 😂 This video explains why!! Thank you for this and for spreading God’s truth ❤

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Thank you so much for sharing! I know EXACTLY what you mean! I feel the same way.

[@deannajunkin3696]

I am Gen X and I had my first child in 2002 before social media as we know it today. I read parenting books and magazines and experienced peer pressure. I do think it was nothing like today, though. The big "mommy war" issues at the time were breast vs bottle, and working vs staying home. I still experienced guilt because whatever I did, it was "wrong" in someone's eyes. My best advice is to be confident in your decisions.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Oh yes, the temptation for guilt and shame and mommy wars have always been around. I’m positive even before media and technology of any kind (books are considered technology too, technically) there were similar issues. The point of the video is to highlight specifically social media.

[@RoseMMM789]

One of the major reasons I got off social media was the posts about how your child "should" be acting. It's too hard not to compare where my children are developmentally with other people's children. I'm so much happier off IG.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

100% I completely relate to this!!!

[@KaitlynRaeann]

I’m not on social media and I still find that expectations of motherhood are just so different than reality. I’m a fun, creative and energetic person but parenting multiple littles with big attitudes and a penchant for grabbing as many things as possible to throw around the house… by the end of the day (and often earlier than I like) the frustrated mom who is constantly saying no, dishing out discipline and running in circles trying to keep up takes over. I’ve been working on my mindset because there’s many moments when I’m being serious and feeling frustrated because I’ve lost my gratitude that I know if I could just smile and laugh at the babies playing instead of thinking about the mess they are making, I would find my joy in that moment again. Mindset is so huge. But there’s also still the reality that parenting is so hard and we don’t get to just be the fun, crafty moms we may want to be all the time. I’m trying to remind myself all day that I’m not called to have a fun day enjoying my children but I’m called to steward these people unto the Lord and to set them up to be good adults. And there will be many days where I enjoy them and we all have fun… but that’s not every day or season or stage. Anyways… it’s not just a social media thing. It’s the reality of what parenting is like vs anything we could have thought it would be, for better and worse, it’s just different.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Oh for sure. Parenting problems have always and will always exist within and outside of social media. I wasn’t saying that social media is the cause of all parenting issues - just that it can cause so much more harm than good. And I know what you mean regarding the fun mom! For me, it’s a balance of being fun and carefree and also realistic and knowing our main priority is to keep the Lord in our children’s heart!

[@KaitlynRaeann]

@@TransformedHomemakersSociety oh totally! i deleted social media years ago for a reason. Btw, so thankful for all you share about anger and submitting to the Lord. He showed me a few months ago - when He brought me your channel - how I had come into agreement with the lie "I just can't take anymore" and that allowed me to be harassed by the devil and I began having explosive anger problems. I've since repented, broken agreement with that phrase, and the Lord is now teaching me about how to become a servant (part 2 of me getting set free of a spirit of anger and dealing with emotional response problems.) Have you read "M is for Mama" by Abbie Halberstadt? She discusses a "30 day gentleness challenge" in there which I just went through and has been even more insightful for me as the Lord renews my mind in this area.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

@@KaitlynRaeann What beautiful insight about the lie you were buying into which contributed to your anger! Years ago I heard about the challenge and LOVED the idea! I think it's a wonderful resource for mamas. There are so many avenues for healing. Some moms struggle with the self control aspect, some battle with nagging thoughts, some (like me) experience physical suffering like nervous system dysfunction which puts their body in a chronic state of fight/flight/freeze. All of which the Lord is able to use all kinds of methods for healing.

[@samanthawalker2618]

I feel like I could have wrote this myself! I have 4 kids 7,5,2 and 8 months and so much time is wasted because they are impulsively grabbing random things that they don’t actually do anything besides throw it on the ground and hanging off the cabinet doors or baby walker/car seat/stroller and they are just not that gentle curious little human that social media says kids are. I feel like I spend more time diffusing issues than actually enjoying moments with them and I find myself getting resentful because they won’t appreciate the his dull worm farm I built to explore worms in our nature studyor enjoy the books I’m reading that all the homeschool moms insist kids enjoy. I have to let the expectations go for sure

[@katie7748]

I implore you to look into what you are actually saying when you refer to children as the L word. Hint: disgusting "adult" stuff (childgrape, !n sessst, etc....) YES, *REALLY!!*

[@Mmolesy]

Im a mum of 11 and i went through a really tough time and there is no way i would share even a snippet of it on social media. I only posted happy stuff even though i felt like i was dying inside and my house was out of control. Ive seen videos of mothers with nice houses, but only 2 or 3 kids and the title of the video was along the lines of "my house is trashed lets clean!" And they proceed to act like its a regular occurrence. Which leads me to think, "why did you let it get so bad in the first place?" Or "pfft, its not that trashed, clearly they are overeacting or its staged which means they are lying."" Or homemakers that have beautiful homes , perfectly decoratedor beautiful clothes or doing extensive renovations etc. it certainly doesnt encourage contentment. And then theres the all too often youtuber mum who divorces her husband. After her channel grew and was profitable,hubby left his job to help out and her ego grew and she leaves him. And then theres the general behaviour of christians online or exposing ourselves to vulgarity,violence,jesting. I need to cut back. 😒

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Right. It's a lot to take in and filter through your own paradigm.

[@katie7748]

Ohmygosh yes! Thank you!!

[@jmrsflix]

Never heard so much wisdom in a single video, thank you

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Well, thank you! 😃 Glory be to God!

[@kalliewilliamson]

Such a great message in today’s video!! Social media has changed our landscape greatly.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Thank you so much! I completely agree. Motherhood looks soooo different now than it should - and Christian mamas should be different and stand out in every way.

[@Thehappyhomemaker]

Just found your channel, I love this video. I'm a millennial too and agree with all the things you're saying. I deleted my social media at the end of 2024. I just have youtube now. Listening to your video while I snack and fill my spice jars ha

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

That’s great!! Way to be productive - I should fill mine too!

[@Doridoesthings]

I quit social media at the beginning of this year and I don't miss it at all. I thought I would. 🤷‍♀️ social media has been making me feel overexposed, over marketed to, and dare I say, BEHIND in life. I am not behind. I've accomplished so much, but in the past few years I haven't done anything remarkable. Social media has us burning ourselves out to 'impress' people who don't care and we don't care about. It's so weird. I just want to be done with it. If someone wants to find me, mail me a letter lol 😂

[@misskingschild3670]

Thank you so much for this needed video! In the future I would appreciate timestamps to understand and remember the different points better :)

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Thank you so much for watching b. Jn so glad it was helpful. 🤎 I will consider doing that for these types of videos!

[@ahsinrev6704]

I really needed to hear this. You are doing amazing. I pray blessings over you and your family. Truly thank you for your obedience ❤.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Oh thank you so much for this sweet comment! I’m so happy this was edifying for you.

[@kathrynwind4366]

It sounds like the Lord is working on us in much the same way, much of what you just said could have come from my mouth! I’d love to see that Suzanne Venker video you mentioned. Would you be able to link it? Thanks for all the encouragement!

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

I THINK it’s this one, but idk because she has so much on this topic! kzbin.info/www/bejne/i6CzZpV5f72Mp6Msi=oU0WJxnQxsThhIT0

[@Mrsg123]

I think for me one of the harmful messages about dating that I got from social media in high school was that your boyfriend should be your everything. That you should be ride or die, 100% committed, basically giving him privileges that he hasn’t earned if you’re not married. I’m not saying I think we should be disloyal to someone we’re dating, but I also don’t think dating was meant to be this marriage-like commitment because when you view it that way, it is easier to justify giving yourself away to someone. I think dating is meant to be a time of getting to know someone to SEE IF you can give your heart, body, and life to them in marriage.

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

That’s an interesting point! I think I was influenced by that concept as well.

[@femkerichardson]

wow, needed this!

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

🤎

[@XOA0108]

Thank you so much for this video

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

You’re so welcome! Thank you for watching!

[@bellalane5358]

Beautiful advice. ❤

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Thank you for watching! 🤎

[@family-peace-love]

Excellent video. Thank you

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Thank you! So glad you loved it!

[@renaeans6793]

I really appreciated this !! Would you be able to link the video you mentioned? I cannot find her .

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

I don’t know the exact one but I linked it in another comment on here 😊

[@mariannetaylor4549]

Thank you for this! What was the name of the Susanna Venker you were talking about?

[@mariannetaylor4549]

Never mind! I found the link under another comment. Thank you!

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

You’re so welcome! Thank you for watching!

[@debbielyn11]

I thought pumping would be easier than nursing, boy was I wrong

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

lol I happen to agree with this. But it’s different for everyone!

[@holly1839]

Gosh, I so appreciate you. I’m grateful God is using you to help others, like myself 🤍

[@TransformedHomemakersSociety]

Thank you so much for being here! It’s so wonderful to have such a great community of Christian women!