Depersonalization/Derealization- Living Until You Feel Alive Again

I'm just on a journey to live until I can feel alive again. I'm sharing my experience with you in hopes of helping others and hopefully finding a cure to this disorder.
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CHECK OUT MY BLOG OR EMAIL ME.
BLOG: gildedsol.wordpress.com
EMAIL: [e-mail]

[@kttheg6937]

Once you come out of this funk, you guys will be so much stronger internally and some much more grateful for the pure gift of life itself.

[@feasiblesituation8367]

did you recover from this?

[@alypaz946]

KT The G I'm finally understanding what you meant by that comment. It has taken time, but you are very right. Thanks!

[@shameeahmadarang8391]

You go girl!! I'm so proud of you Your an inspiration to the world!!! I love you and I will hold your hand along the way xoxo.. I need the support as well. I understand what you are going through I had dp and dr for almost 9 yrs I have my bad days and I have my good days. But I ignore it..

[@jamesschraffl6820]

Aly please make more videos, we have so many things in common and hearing you talk makes me feel happy knowing I'm not the only one that feels these things

[@matw1x]

You're so beautiful...Quite a journey you're having...My DP/DR started immediately right after I got into spirituality about 6 months ago and your vids have been helping a lot...Thank you...Surrender but never give up:]

[@alypaz946]

Eugene Choi It really means a lot to me to know that my videos help in any way. Thank you for reaching out!

[@ndnbutler503]

You have a beautiful soul Aly! i can tell just from watching this video and reading your replies that you have a kind heart. I have Faith that you will find what you are looking for. sometimes when we are in search of something and we can't find it, it's best to let it be and wait. not in a sense of giving up but in the sense of living, like you said. eventually what you are looking for will come to you, so until then, you might as well live it up as best you can. so just keep living and eventually the sense of relief you seek will find you. the journey continues, with or without the feeling of disassociation so enjoy as much of this precious life you were given as we all have meaning in this world, never forget that and always be in search of that meaning. much love to you and everyone else on their journey.

[@alypaz946]

Leland Butler Thank you very much for your vote of confidence and your compliment. I completely agree with your sentiment. It means a lot!

[@0Mandalore]

I have had derealization for eight years since I was ten. I am not sure what caused it, but I would not wish it on my worst enemy. It has been a great burden for me. I always find myself imagining the immense relief that would come with my derealization going away. Life would be vivid again. I would feel truly at ease. I would perform better in my studies. I wish you and all DP/DR sufferers all the best. No person deserves going through this, believe me.

[@alypaz946]

+0Mandalore I feel the same way. We must be very strong people to have endured this disorder for so many years. There is nothing that would make me happier than to be able to feel again, so of course nothing gets me down more than the realization that this disorder is relentless. Thank you for reaching out. It means a lot! I wish you well and recovery.

[@settledsea]

Thank you Aly for this video. I have been suffering with anxiety off and on since 2010 and DP/DR symptoms since maybe 2014, since struggling with panic attacks. This past year it has been at its worst. Lately it just seems like the fog is constantly with me, I feel like I "don't belong in the world" or the world is just too much for me to handle. I constantly worry that if I continue to feel the fog and other physical symptoms that come from the anxiety and DP/DR like dizziness, slight nausea, and existential, negative, ruminating thought patterns that I will never be able to function, get a job and just live life. I just want to be happy, and I just can't imagine having to be in this state in the long term and functioning :( I am going to a therapist and trying to meditate and eat better, but i still have a long way to go and its hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel to a life where I don't feel this way 24/7. Thanks again for this encouragement and I wish you all the best. -Claire

[@samelizabeth4073]

I have hope for you. Once you acknowledge your brain had to go into protective mode it's much easier to accept it. I have had this for 5 months and lucked out with a great therapist who believes I will recover. It's up to me and it's up to you to feel " normal" again. Best wishes.

[@alypaz946]

Thank you for reaching out! I'm so glad to hear about another person on the road to recovery. It gives me hope. I wish you the very best on your journey.

[@xxMisterJxx]

Sam Elizabeth how do you feel now?

[@flamuremerllahu3450]

+Aly Paz i am taking zyprexa olanzapine for dp does work or no

[@edithzamora2220]

@@flamuremerllahu3450 how did the medication help

[@BoredomEnsues]

Thank you for putting yourself out there and sharing your thoughts and feelings. You are much more eloquent at expressing yourself than you give yourself credit for, no need to apologize.

[@alypaz946]

Thank you very much. I really appreciate that you reached out.

[@BoredomEnsues]

Aly Paz I'm in a similar boat, though I've only been experiencing it for a little less than a year. Seven years must be really rough. Mine seems to vary in intesity, depending on my lifestyle. Isolation and avoidance of what I percieve as triggers seem to make it worse, as does toiling over it and trying to analyze or rationalize it. I'm sure you have, but have you tried mindfulness meditation and other relaxation techniques? It can take a lot of discipline to do it regularly, but I have found it helpful. I do believe those who say it stems from anxiety. I think we are constantly anxious over our altered and dissociated state of conciousness which continuously feeds the anxiety and DP in a sort of loop.

[@VicSaidThat]

Thank you.. you are describing what im going thru night.. you gave me courgage to strive on . thanku

[@jamesmccrone9482]

Well done aly very brace of you to post this 👍🏼

[@alypaz946]

james mccrone Thanks a lot!

[@schoolkid8677]

I feel your pain your very beautiful also but it can be mentally daring I was a big overthinking before I got this and now 1 year In it's gotten better but my thoughts seem clouded so I have to push myself everyday and have faith that it'll get better I believe everything happens for a reason even this hell of a disorder something good could come out of it for all of us

[@alypaz946]

I've sort of been coming to that same realization. I think that something good can come out of experiencing this disorder. Perhaps it has given us insight and potential for something great. The only challenge is that we will have to overcome our fears and insecurities. Best wishes! I hope you recover very soon!

[@michotruth3156]

Love your videos! Do you also have social anxiety? I have this at the same time. Ive come a long way when I look back , didnt even go out before , today I go to school and meet people. I sometimes feel like I scare people because im so cold inside but some days the old me is visiting this gives me hope.

[@alypaz946]

I also have anxiety, but I'm working to manage it. I've also had a fear that people could see that something was off about me. I felt like they were better than me because they didn't have to "fake it". I had to realize that those thoughts weren't healthy, and I'm so much happier now that I've been putting myself out there and trying to be a part of something positive in the world. Thanks for reaching out!

[@mrnomnom]

I really hope I get out of this soon and I wish the same for you guys

[@abdullahalrwaily2524]

Thank you for this video ... I hear many of treatment way .. but the best is ignoring

[@alypaz946]

Thanks for your advice and for reaching out!

[@VicSaidThat]

i just feel so out of control and crazy, i have these all kinds of discoaciatve weird thoughts

[@feasiblesituation8367]

how do you "make yourself" feel?

[@TheOrganicMatrix]

Just a thought: Have you tried "Earthing"? (search for it on KZbin it's everywhere). It might help with anchoring yourself to this physical reality, in which we all reside(for now). Also, not sleeping near WiFi or a Mobile phone might help. Experimental suggestions, as a 'cure' is not yet known definitively.

[@Pulkit164]

Its 2020 now, how you feel today, my dp dr just started 2 months i have been diagnosed with benzo,

[@MrKickflip66]

Would you say your dp/dr is getting better in any way?

[@alypaz946]

I don't think that it has gotten better, but I do believe that I have learned how to manage it better. There have been times when the "fog" has cleared for an instant, and those moments gave me hope that I might fully recover one day.

[@MrKickflip66]

ahh, what caused it? Are you going to a therapist that specializes in disassociation?

[@danramirez5883]

i feel like a walking corps, its a living hell,i hope it goes away, its been 5 months of pure shittyness:( God help us please...

[@alypaz946]

Dan Ramirez It can be very desperate and lonely at times. I like to think that I've been growing because of this experience. I really hope you can find some happiness. Stay strong, friend!

[@danramirez5883]

Aly Paz thanks hun, im like this because of relationship breakups, it really has left me dead inside, hope you also find happiness in life ;)

[@tonyk8633]

Are you still around my friend?

[@stephaniep2674]

Do you ever feel Afraid of getting insane

[@evertbjorklund9750]

Hi somewhan tolv men brintellix can help! !!

[@SGames_1]

can i email u

[@alypaz946]

ace 45 Yes, of course. [e-mail]

[@ivannovoselac3518]

DPDR is not illness!

[@Trustern]

Do you have a brain fog? Describe how you feel in your head when thinking (If so)

[@alypaz946]

Trustern Yes, I'm referring to the "fogginess" in my head. There's also the "fog" that acts like a barrier between me and the rest of the world.

[@johnmclawrence4676]

I think I may have had this, would you give your heart to Jesus if he would heal you of this condition Jesus is God and the bible says he can heel all sicknesses.

[@AnimeRaindrop]

7 fucking years....i have had this hellhole of a disorder for 7 months because of smoking weed.

[@alypaz946]

Yeah, it has been 7 years of torture, but my life has been looking up. I think that smoking weed intensifies the dp/dr if you keep smoking it. Same happened to me, and I regret that so much. I hope that you recover soon!

[@jonmichael8595]

MaGiiK WizDom the same here! Just smoking weed one cursed night.

[@jonmichael8595]

The same in here.. don't feed it worry and fear. with time it will get better...

[@samelizabeth4073]

MaGiiK WizDom you can't die from depersonalization. Do everything you would do normally. My husband had this when he was 17 from smoking weed. He feels fine now.

[@AnimeRaindrop]

Sam Elizabeth Is his depersonalization completely gone?