'Dirty John' Survivor Terra Newell: 'I Would Be Lying If I Say I'm Completely Ok' | Access

Real life survivors of "Dirty John" John Meehan Terra and Debra Newell open up on Access Live and give an update on how they're doing following John's death. Terra gets candid about how the show and podcast have brought up some very difficult memories for her, as well.
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'Dirty John' Survivor Terra Newell: 'I Would Be Lying If I Say I'm Completely Ok' | Access
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[@GentlRebel]

I hope Debra has learned that the minute a man tells you that your children are bad and you need to distance yourself from them, he goes right out the door and out of your life. Period. Full stop.

[@clovis9881]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/sJaYo6atmKyWaJo

[@Mojojojo335]

I mean I wouldn’t say every time cuz Ronnie was a brat but I get your point

[@InterestedCitizen]

Yes, a huge red flag🔴

[@janemoreira7637]

Um dos primeiros sinais do abusador. Não dê créditos, ainda mais quando você tiver certeza: meus filhos são bons, corretos, amorosos! Se afaste é do embuste. Uma dica: saia de fininho, saia aos poucos, deixe que ele arrume outra😬🙏🏽👌🏾

[@begonafernandez4]

While watching the Netflix show, Debra got on my nerves...the actress was so good!

[@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494]

Yes, but Connie Britton played her so sympathetically, and with such nuance - she made it easy to feel for her (as well as maybe condescend to judge her behaviour) and see her as a tender-hearted, idealistic woman. Yes, she was good!

[@normmidnight3692]

@@angelicaalvarez3587 yes, I was shouting at the screen as she made such a lot of stupid mistakes

[@Bestme78]

Oh she made me so mad

[@kayladjeje4373]

Being in an emotionally abusive and manipulative relationship can take a toll on anyone and although you don’t think you’d make those decisions, it’s hard to choose how you’d act giving that he lied so easily

[@sandygrogg1203]

Connie Britton dud an awesome job... “Debra” was so deep into denial... It was frustrating...

[@SanneHillemans]

OMG Connie portrayed her PERFECTLY. They are the same, the way they talk, handle themselves. So good.

[@sarahd8674]

Sanne Hillemans thinking the samething

[@leoncarr920]

I thought the actress was being over dramatic and embellishing the character for the role, but Connie was spot on... unbelievable. BTW - great job Tara... you and your sister are America Strong. God Bless.

[@julianasky1355]

I know Terra personally and she’s a strong young woman and she is brave! I’m glad they are all okay and survived. God bless them and all the victims.

[@blondesense1708]

She is so brave. I actually thought the depiction of Debra & her girls was a little mean, but now I see they were just lighthearted, fun ladies targeted by a predator. I am glad she seems at peace. She rocks!

[@MD-gz5yw]

My heart bled for her, what an utterly terrifying experience. I was shocked. Didn't expect that ending. Bless you, young lady. You done did good, everyone is rooting for you.

[@georgielockhart6686]

I have a question, how close is the portrayel of her in the Bravo series to the real Terra because she seems completly adorable in that.

[@Meatdevil]

Wonder if there is security footage of the incident in the parking lot. Would be interesting to see what really happened and how it actually played out. Crazy story all around.

[@harrietboateng5239]

tell her the world thinks shes amazing

[@ladvocat]

Connie Britton did such a good job, by watching this interview is impressive how much she looked like Debra Newell on the show

[@ChloeMorello]

I listened to the podcast and just finished the show, it’s so scary! The man was a master manipulator and I can’t believe the hate on Debra in the comments!

[@aedivian]

Her lack of common sense almost got her daughter killed, a daughter that now has PTSD because her mother chose a man instead of her.

[@meredithbeaudoin808]

I think nobody will ever understand completely how manipulation really work until youve really lived it and how much somebody is willing to belive anything just to be loved and it doesnt make them stupid it just make everything so deeply sad and to be honestly I wouldnt wish that to anybody

[@roweonne]

People will never understand you because you just love a person. I’m a domestic violence survivor and I was also manipulated and lied a lot of times and thank god I was able to get out as soon as I can because of my parents and I also thought about my daughter’s life. Other women went through worse than me and Debra. And a lot of people don’t understand why we still came back to the monster that’s sleeping beside us.

[@lexidevi]

@Excusesareforthosewhoneedthem X 1st, know that the worst is over, because you have accepted the fact that no matter what people may tell you, you know the truth, the relationship is never going to get better, and he's never going to change. Hold on to that, tightly. 2nd, trust your gut. It will always let you know when you're off track. Don't ignore that stomach pang & don't talk yourself out of what your basic instincts are telling you. 3rd, right now, make a plan to get out of your abusive relationship. Mental and emotional abuse is every bit as bad as physical abuse. If you can't safely leave right now, set short term goals for when you can move, such as, when you'll have a safe place to go, enough money to do so & a good time of day to make the move when he will definitely not be there trying to stop you or talk you out of it. 4th Be careful who you talk to about this, and of course, get out immediately if it turns physical. You can do this! I will be sending you energy and prayers every step of the way.

[@73cidalia]

aedivian Which is why she is also so brave to put her story out there to help others, knowing that it makes her look bad in many ways.

[@mrsnevens7532]

Omg, the match.com ad before this vid.

[@fakiola9184]

Mrs Nevens 🤣🤣🤣

[@BBenice1]

teehee

[@deanna334]

😂😂😂😂

[@hamilton7798]

This girl is a fucking hero! I had literal chills watching the documentary. When it was at the part where he was on top of her, even though she was on the documentary talking and alive, I thought she was a goner. Then hearing her say it was me or him and she picked up that knife and ended dozens of people who are suffering because of this monster, I was cheering out loud, by myself, woke up my dog. That is survival, that is strength, what a fucking legend! You go girl.

[@perennialxennial]

Terra is a badass! I'm saddened she has to go through the awful memories every day of her life.

[@marilynmonroe5824]

she's happy to be alive & that overrides it shithead! Watch the whole video idiot!

[@Alexandra_Hill]

@@marilynmonroe5824 I think you commented on the wrong thread, YodaEconomics is complimenting Terra, not insulting her.

[@clovis9881]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/sJaYo6atmKyWaJo

[@paudsmcmack3117]

She stabbed a man to death, granted a scumbag deserving but we glorify such instances.

[@sypha0014]

This woman had a forensic psychologist, a private detective and two lawyers working with her to help get her out safely and she barely by the skin of her teeth made it out!!! This should be the first people think of when wanting to say "why can't you just leave?!" to women/men who are in controlling and abusive relationships!! Not everyone has the resources that Debra was fortunate enough to be able to afford. You can't just leave it's not that simple!!

[@MrJayculter]

Finally a happy ending to a real horror movie and she was strong enough and stabbed the shit out of him, not screaming and running away so he can get her from the back, she solved the problem once and for all.......Justice served.

[@jonhohensee3258]

I think she got knocked to the ground and that's why she wasn't running away.

[@clovis9881]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/sJaYo6atmKyWaJo

[@fredajordan5704]

Yes Terra did everything right in this most dangerous life situation that her mother put her in. Wish Terry all the luck on this earth. So sorry her little doggy died as well.

[@seydasasmaz2673]

That breath Terra has taken when her mother said "sorry, but marriage met something to me"... I am just so sorry for Terra....

[@sandrapatterson2916]

I don't hear it 3:00 but can surely imagine it. I would have gagged.

[@glesiaful]

You are a narcissist.

[@sweetielady7710]

My heart breaks for Terra the more I look into this. “Marriage meant something to me” says the woman who spontaneously married her 5th husband whom she’d known for 2 months at a Vegas chapel. Like come on Debra, who do you think you’re fooling?

[@fredajordan5704]

Seyda I feel the same way. Terra and her siblings are really not blessed with a responsible and protective mom, rather the opposite.

[@majcev82]

I watched so many crime shows but this one left me speechless. I believe so much more should have been done to prevent this from happening. A new law needs to be made to stop psychopaths like John. You can tell something like this would happen or worse. Her daughters are true heroes and to have Jacquelin so involved is amazing and something I would do. I cannot say how happy I am that the knife was turned on him in the end. Great job Terra for being ready and defending yourself to end the burden for all.

[@jramsey9690]

majcev82 You’d be surprised how many assholes get away with this kind of stuff. Happens all the time. These guys KNOW how to get around the legal system and how to manipulate people so well. Wait, sounds like Donald Trump!

[@sweetielady7710]

@@jramsey9690 sadly you’re right about the manipulation. My dad was like John Meehan except he was better at manipulating and has managed to never go to jail. I have permanent neck pain from the time he choked me. Even with proof, he still managed to fool the cops and dodge getting arrested. I think part of the reason he got away with it (like so many abusers do), is because the police are sometimes narcissists themselves. There are many good cops out there, but many are also narcissists who get drawn to that position of power. For some reasons narcissists seem to defend each other and have each others’ backs, and I think that’s why so many abusive people manage to dodge having to face any real punishment.

[@ailishmaguire7073]

Debora was so desperate for a guy she put him before her kids. I did love the Podcast and the show but I couldn’t believe she took him back after she found out how many lies he had been telling her. “We are the survivors”. Come on Deb it’s Terra who is the survivor! She had to kill someone because of the guy you brought into your family. I do understand a little that Deb didn’t take the kids seriously at the beginning because the always went on that way where their mom and men were concerned.

[@sweetlocs42]

Okay I just finished the Netflix series and it was absolutely nuts! this had to be considered rich white people problems. she married a guy after knowing him for a month.. Plus the real john omg looked crazy as hell in the eyes.. talk about desperate housewife. she really fell for this crazy guy?. she was rich and didn't run a background check ...etc.?? wow! she really put her kids in harms way! is all I will say. the woman that played Debra was really good ! she played the submissive timid lady to the hills it got on my dammm nerve! but I just could not stop watching … was it because they came from a religious background ? cause the grandmother forgiving the man that murdered her daughter

[@tinabirdshafer]

This show upset me to the core....I came out of it feeling " we see what we want to see, hear what we want to hear, and disregard the rest" ... hard lesson to learn . This was NOT LOVE.

[@debrabaron6495]

Her daughter is a survivor. Shes a volunteer

[@nanettevalencia4243]

Wow! That's spot on!

[@Hugatree1]

Debra Baron best summation ever!

[@FernandoDiaz-wh4qx]

oh wow, the actress who played debra on the netflix show did a really good job capturing the cadence and demeanor of the real debra

[@katiainonan2290]

Terra you are so brave and l am glad you made it alive. I want to let you know God can heal that part of your life completely and make you whole🙏🏼♥️. I’ m saying a prayer over you and your family. Thank you for sharing your story for us to learn from. God bless you and your family always!

[@JizzyRizzy89]

I wouldnt even lose sleep over what she did to John. u dont play with nobody family . thats wen u someone dangerous.

[@jerrycraig6522]

For some reason I can't explain or even understand, I love listening to Terra!!!

[@kdoc19961]

I am watching Dear John on Netflix and I want to slap the soul out of Debra. What a damn fool. She put her family at risk when she had all the evidence that he was not up to any good. I hate her daughter had to pay the price for her stupidity.

[@vgardner1688]

Sorry, No woman deserves what Debra went through but at the same time how dumb can a person be. You don't marry someone 2 months after you met online. 100 red flags & she ignores all of them. Let this be a lesson to all women.

[@lexidevi]

Dirty John was her 5th husband! What does that tell you?

[@cospi212]

Maybe men shouldn't be sociopaths...

[@marylikes4899]

She got the first red flag the first night. What a huge one too.

[@just_as_it_is_tho]

I’m glad I was not the only one watching the show and thought the same thing... I mean COME ON....

[@issiebakam599]

Valerie Gardner completely agree about the red flags but it just goes to show how good of a manipulator some men like John are. No one wants to be in that situation but sometimes it’s just as hard getting out as realising the danger in the first place

[@princess92822]

If the mom would of listen to Tara this would of probably been better . How is it that she married all those times to different people and still be so naive? She need to be smarter for next time . So many flags and she ignored them all .

[@lexidevi]

Dirty John was Deborah's 5th, FIFTH husband. She's obviously extremely insecure and not very smart about men, so maybe not as successful in her professional life as the movie portrayed, so she kept searching for...I'll be nice and just end it there.

[@IllHandleThis]

April Is that you, Deborah? The best comeback you have is trying to correct people...don’t be bitter, be better 😂

[@marilynmonroe5824]

he's dead because of her children's love for her and many victims don't get that kind of great blessing!

[@jonhohensee3258]

@@marilynmonroe5824 - Um.. no. He's dead because he attacked the daughter and she knew how to fight back.

[@jonhohensee3258]

@April - No idea what you're talking about.

[@colinconnolly6285]

Love the daughter. Brave woman. The 'mum' is an absolute embarrassment.

[@duanedaily5202]

Even that voice?

[@BBenice1]

@@duanedaily5202 OMG very Kardashianesc

[@JizzyRizzy89]

And the mom is no surviver she invited him back into her life after she found out about him. And she even gave him the keys back. The only surviver is the daughter Terra

[@Ragerian]

The valley girl accent makes her sound like a child

[@fredajordan5704]

Colin Thank you for stating this, it`s sickenig what she did in order to have a man.....

[@katieneudorff2655]

These woman have been through so much and are so strong to have the courage to share their story! I wish we could all show them love and the haters in the world could stop hating for a moment and recognize what this woman and her family have been through. She didn't have to share her story. She did it so the rest of us could be aware of the evil's that walk among us.

[@lauragonzalezdominguez8539]

Such an horrendous history what happened to you. I am very proud of you and your daughters to be so brave, heroes. I really wish you all the best.

[@ritacho3911]

This girl is my hero!!!!!! Amazing.

[@olliewisdom6639]

His Sister was treated horribly aswell. He put her out of her own Trailer at the beach. He made my skin crawl and i don't know him. I'm glad that you got out okay. It's a terrible thing when a person has to go to therapy because of a crazed person who only cared about himself.

[@fredajordan5704]

Yes indeed. Can´T see why Terra and her siblings even have furhter contact to this unresponsible and selfish mother. I know I would ignore her for the rest of my life and let her find the next Dirty John. Cz that`s what`s gonna happen.

[@miryamishot]

Thank you for getting rid of a roach.

[@audreymyers4823]

Imagine if Debra would've listened to her daughter's from the very beginning. Furthermore, who gets married after 5 weeks? Not too smart lady.

[@jonhohensee3258]

Audrey - daughters

[@irishnessie]

It's hard to see the red flags when you're in the relationship. You're blind to it all. It's only _after_ you're looking back it's then you notice the red flags. That's why it's always important to ask friends or family their advice on someone, because they're looking for another perspective. If most people are saying there's something wrong or off about someone, then it's more than likely true.

[@sym3125]

And 5th husband .....

[@JizzyRizzy89]

who marries someone in 2 months. that's not even long enough to remember yo last name.

[@etherealtb6021]

Lots of kids hate the new person in their parents lives when theyr is nothing wrong with them. It is hard to tell the difference, I'm sure.

[@Bunnyb23]

For anyone criticizing Debra google “narcissistic abuse”

[@ourcorrectopinions6824]

Actually Debra is also a narcissist. Her remarkable lack of empathy and flat affect/lack of comforting her daughter reliving a trauma she enabled is sick and aberrant for a parent.

[@Alexandra_Hill]

@@ourcorrectopinions6824 oh you know her personally, spoke with her often to know this, no, I didn't think so. She is portrayed as a soft, gentle woman, she was a prime target for a man like John.

[@bc5127]

O bless how TERRYFYING!. Good for them putting this out.

[@Brook_Nichelle]

I had the wonderful opportunity to interview Terra Newell on my podcast. Her story is inspiring and she is so sweet.

[@lauraindira8421]

Terra is amazing! I love Debra too.

[@Abdielpau]

Wow, the actors evolved in the show were really good.

[@clairelariviere111]

As a survivor of coercive control myself, I am so grateful to you and your family for sharing this part of your lives so that the issue becomes part of our conversation on dating/relating and following our GUT INSTINCT! Without fear of retaliation from him, you are in a perfect position to expose their tricks that basically keep us held aganst our will. We have been the target of other people's judgement but those of us who have survived understand completely how disastrous this situation can be. In my situation, I went from the love bombing to feeling that my relationship was a double bind where any choice of mine I would be the loser and it happened so fast I didn't really know what hit me. I felt the danger in my gut but could not understand it because I didn't have the words. Thank you for teaching people the words.

[@psw4763]

I was glad he did not hurt his first wife and his only two daughters in that marriage. He did threaten her but the courage of step daughter is commendable for the fight she put up to save herself.

[@xbxbxb5814]

Terra is a hero and a survivor.

[@whitneyjones8678]

I tried watching it on Netflix and couldn’t stand it!!! What a Crazy Madman!

[@72deejay]

I’m much younger than Debra with no children and met a guy on the Plenty of Fish dating website back in early 2008. I’m a very needy, co-dependent person (or was at that time) and he was very much like this narcissist. They are very good at their “craft” of turning things around and making a naive (which I think most of us agree Debra was/is) woman do what they want. I know it was that way for me although I was raised by a very headstrong Mom, who wouldn’t have put up with it. I’m not wealthy like Debra so I’m not sure to this day why the guy I got involved with “targeted” me. I spent the entire year of 2008 up until I had a sister pass away in early 2009 with him and even went so far as to have him move in with me. He was a drug addict (the heavy stuff) and I didn’t even realize it until it was almost too late. The final straw was when he made me late to my sister’s funeral, a day I can’t ever get back. He was out in my car getting drugs from his dealer. I ended up in early 2009, about a month after my sister’s death and after a heartfelt “intervention” of sorts by my Mom and other sister, breaking the lease on my condo and selling everything but my personal belongings, which I stored in a storage facility until I could come back and get them all and relocated out of state. He stalked me via cell phone until I ended up finally, after two or three phone number changes, getting rid of him permanently. I haven’t heard from him ever again and I’m now happily married for the past nine years to a (now retired) Police Major. I do believe Debra Newell is naive but has a good heart. I can only hope and pray she has learned something very valuable, for her and her daughters’ sakes, and will never repeat this type behavior again. It’s simply not worth it. P.S. I forgot to mention that I met my current husband online, too and within nine months of meeting, we were married and as I said above, are about to celebrate our ninth wedding anniversary next month. Online dating can have good outcomes; you just have to be cautious and check people out as best you can.

[@lexidevi]

Thank you for sharing your story. I too, know your pain and how great it is to walk away and save myself. Dirty John was Debra's 5th marriage, and her children's, mother's and her nephew's lives were all in jeopardy, as was hers. Even after he left a message that her daughter would find herself in the ocean as shark bait, Debra STILL refused to cut the ties to him. Our stories are the usual, but for Debra to not only dismiss and deny the evidence and proof that he was a danger, over and over, when her loved ones lives were in danger, that puts her in a whole different class of her own. I heard her on all the talk shows, and she is still defending her actions. She's a true danger to herself, and all around her. No wonder that 3 of her 4 kids (yes, she has 4) don't want anything to do with her.

[@sunflower9481]

Yes, she should've known better, but Debra knows she's going to get critisism and she's putting herself aside to be a voice for other women(or men) in similar situations. Even though many of us will shake our heads at her, there are many other people out there who relate and that's all that matters - So that hopefully this story will give someone the insight or strength to realise and get out of their situations. If her story can help someone, it frankly doesn't matter what the rest of us think.

[@ivyhanks1767]

Waooooo....!!!!!!🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 hope terra is ok

[@Simpliyvonne]

I haven’t seen the show yet, it’s on my watch list. Had no idea it was based on a true story.

[@sophiaatn5339]

Terra is incredible

[@rydbthatsme]

She’s amazing and of course she’s not ok. She killed a human being it’s not somethin you just get over.

[@rydbthatsme]

Dean Wayne same

[@alanonimo8979]

She obviously has. PTSD? That's a bullshit diagnosis.

[@JizzyRizzy89]

honestly to me. I think John got what he had coming to him. u don't mess with nobody family. I don't give a care who u is

[@ourcorrectopinions6824]

I’m pretty sure it’s from almost being murdered... not from killing the man who tried to murder her.

[@desitis6732]

I feel bad for this family. Debra just wanted love. She didn’t choose him over her family. I think she really did think it was a situation where her kids would just come around. She didn’t know the real monster until it was too late. So glad they are all okay!

[@sandrapatterson2916]

Agree!

[@MissJ000]

Debra chose the monster over her own family. Let that sink in

[@lalaishappyyy]

she's a terrible mother

[@jramsey9690]

Very co-dependent.

[@stateyourthesis]

So glad I didn't google this story and ruin the ending for myself, bc I did not expect Terra to be the one to kill him. I thought he was gonna be the murderer. Literally watched this show while I'm going through my own manipulation from my husband. It's small time compared to this but it's good to know how bad it can really get. Glad she shared the story so openly

[@dinniebeattie4679]

Debra wanted to be adored, stroked like a puppy. She had a part to play in this, hurt her family. As for her mother, my ,lost for words

[@kimaudwelch9344]

What do you mean cause I am kinda thinking so about the mom as well

[@robyoung9968]

People knock Debra, but no one can know until you walk in someone else’s shoes.She was being controlled and blinded by love..

[@lexidevi]

Blinded by love, even after he threatened her daughter that he'd make sure she gets lost in the ocean if she didn't back off?

[@Khalagessyca]

No sir. She’s stupid period. I can cut people off with no issues even family if they cross me or my son

[@mcjordaniesaintelus9726]

Narc abuse is not easy but indeed she missed the red flags

[@maggieholt6778]

Blinded by love on her fifth marriage? Sounds more like a pattern, than being "blinded."

[@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494]

I agree with you Rob - I knew of a woman did the same (moved in together almost immediately) and suffered over the longer term (nearly ten years). She was 40 at the time and it was her third serious or marriage-like relationship. She didn't even want him to go when he finally left - her kids (especially her autistic son) also suffered from his alcoholism and he left her in debt. She even repeated the moving-in-way-too-soon pattern with her next partner who, fortunately, turned out to be a pretty decent guy. She's a nice woman, and it took me years to learn not to judge her. What taught me? I was charmed by her same ex over a three-year period into moving in with him, ignoring the handful of red flags he had been incautious enough, this time, to let me see. Two women conned by the same man under very different circumstances. No, I don't judge anymore. I f**king SUPPORT. Only way to out predatory behaviour is to stand together, not assume you know better. Enable victims to speak out - don't further silence with shame.

[@cloudyglory50]

im a victim of this situation and i left before it got worst but still experiencing PTSD i see a therapist but its not enough what should i do?

[@jamicamonroe]

I can get over the fact the her mother went to be by his side after the stabbing and so he wouldn't die alone she was by his side. Her daughter is the victim not her. She chose to be his wife to the end but neglected her role as a mother and that's protecting her daughter running to her aid not his shame on her. Her daughter is super woman!!!

[@tammylain7754]

You can get over ptsd.

[@elenigros]

The mom has personality traits ( trusts easily, very loyal, empathic, etc)that makes her a repeated victim by predators. Same traits unfortunately make her also attractive, talented and extremely likable. I am sure this is not the first time...

[@elenigros]

Denise Neil i agrée.

[@acsentu8]

Damn, I could make money from a story about my ex.

[@MD-gz5yw]

That's not fair. She did it to warn other woman.

[@dontbefatuousjeffrey2494]

Yes she did, Margaret, but why shouldn't Amy's A make money from a story if it gets her something out of an abusive situation? Sounds better than just living with the PTSD to me. I hope this attitude doesn't make me sound hardened... I just like the idea that someone could make something work for them out of a dark situation, maybe even more than altruism.

[@katarzynanarewska5964]

Same here...!

[@SistahJaki1]

Me too! Haha

[@elizabethvireich1828]

Start writing it...

[@elizabeth8895]

On screen Terra was excellent acting

[@stacybishop3484]

Some of these comments are uncalled for. No one deserves to have this done to them. This was a very sick man! Her family has been through too much

[@aishah5244]

She could have stopped it before it even started!

[@steph8328]

You almost got your child killed stop being a sugar Mama 😂😡

[@laurena4000]

Thank god im not a reporter as I would NOT be able to stop myself from responding in my most exaggerated valley girl voice. “Reallllllaaayyyy? Oooooow my gawd that’s crazay”

[@lucyvandervort6191]

Yes! God, the way they talk is so awful! So kardashian like

[@rayblox4859]

I was never interested in online dating sides, long ago my sister inlaw open an account for me, that same night I dreamt abt 10-20 snakes were rolling around, and I get the message, I never ever ever open that side.

[@missmerbella]

I NEVER want to blame the victim, but this woman abandoned her daughters and knowingly put them in harm's way. That is where she crosses the line from being a blameless victim into needing to accept responsibility for her actions. Her daughters, on the other hand, are heroes.

[@dashawn4350]

I dated someone like DJ I moved my whole life. He continued to stalk my social media for years with fake accounts. He stopped only after I started dating a cop.

[@aishah5244]

Her repeated dumb choices, put her families lives at risk. I feel like she is playing the victim, when she is not. She choose to ignore the information in front o her.

[@lalaishappyyy]

honestly, it's like she liked all the drama. Poor children, never had an actual mother

[@slaws2279]

What a brave girl.

[@slaws2279]

*woman

[@ahamilton3435]

Just because shes not exactly all there. Doesnt mean Debra and her family deserve this. My goodness some people in the comments are just disgusting. Nobody deserves this, innocent women do not deserve a psychotic man stalking and attempting to kill. You should feel sorry for anyone whos gone through this.

[@fakiola9184]

At the end of the day she took a life regardless of why it must be difficult to live with because normal people don't go around killing one another. I have every sympathy for the daughter but despite countless red flags, warnings from family, friends, credible outsiders, her own experiences, offers of help & support her Mother chose to stay, not because she was advised to stay she's making excuses now. Her account has changed somewhat since the Bravo series aired & she's aware of public perception. She even took him back after uncovering who he really was because she made the mistake a lot of women make & that was believing she could be the woman who could change him. Her daughter has one person to thank for the traumatic, life changing event that she'll never fully come to terms with & that's her Mother.

[@devinngeorge]

I would sleep like a babe. It's the attack which is the ptsd not the death

[@hannaj4032]

I can’t believe she gave him access to her money so early in the relationship. Once he had that he was never going quietly.

[@basha0810]

STFU.

[@lexidevi]

@Amber Thompson Do they keep going back, even when the guy says to her daughter, that she's gonna "get lost in the ocean'"?

[@sophiaatn5339]

@@devinngeorge Like a HUGE BABY

[@zentura88]

If this behavior doesn't get shamed, it will continue to happen!

[@MultiKkristina]

Debra seems rather upbeat in the podcast and at times seems as if she is reminiscing of good times with John. To put some guy before your daughters and still defend your actions in talk shows as if she had no choice. She did, she chose to go to a man who nearly ended up killing her daughter. Just too naive to survive in the real world.

[@jhoannapeterson7673]

I don’t feel sorry for Debra. Even after she found out who he was, she stayed with him. Even after he talked to her kids the way he did and threatening them, she stayed. I only feel bad for her children.

[@marsha4796]

An amazing mini-series. Debra and her daughters were way too enmeshed and in each other's grills to have been healthy. These were adult women, not "children". Even so, according to the series, they saw John for what he was, but also according to the series they were kind of spoiled rich girls who seemed to fear someone would take "mommy" away from them and had a history of complaining about her social life. It also really bugged me that adult women would continue to do what seemed like family therapy together way beyond the point of it making sense. Again, these were enmeshed adults. Having said all that, go Terra! Holy smokes, if even half of that all was true, wow...you are an Amazon.

[@sabrinyahh]

you sound like someone who would date a man for 4 weeks then marry him and let him make an attempt on the life of your youngest daughter later. keep your stupid fucking opinions to yourself

[@annbelmonti3737]

She’s just a viking goddess.

[@michellement2158]

you seem to have an issue with the fact that she provided for her two adult daughters who she clearly said in the show we’re “figuring it out.” One was becoming an aesthetician while the other was grooming dogs if the mom had enough money to fund a man’s lifestyle then she had enough money to fund her adult daughters lifestyle until they’re able to figure it out. that’s the privilege you get when you have a stable caring loving parent. if it wasn’t for her daughters she would probably be dead right now. and second therapy should never end, if you love your family and y’all have problems then if everyone agrees to go to therapy where is the issue? You sound jealous and like a woman who would kick her adult daughters out to suck a Niggas dick. You would be the one murdered instead of John and only yourself to blame. I can’t stand trifling ass parents . As if those girls asked to be here.

[@charliebucket8435]

How one can be so fucking delusional is beyond me. At least after the evidence they found in his apartment when he was in the hospital she should’ve finally understood what kind of person he was. Holy shit, how old is Debra? Yeah sure I’m not the one to judge for I have not been in this situation but I can certainly tell you the moment he tried to isolate her from her children should’ve been reason enough to leave this lunatic. I don’t mean to offend anyone but they also don’t seem to be the brightest to begin with and seem painfully naive, gullible and very easy to impress. I felt so sorry for the children the whole time. The fact she not only straight up ignored the red flags but also sacrificed the relationship to her children for this piece of insanity is just sad.

[@mackenzieyoung3973]

I’m so glad they shared their story, the truth is it’s much easier than you think to be swindled by a handsome drug -addicted/ poor intent man. These are the types that prey on our lonely young girls and mothers: introducing them to drugs, manipulating sex, and all sorts of terrible things. There are men in this world whose only intent is to bring Women down… be aware & stand strong ladies.

[@listentoyourintuitionnotyo2517]

What a great family, those kids are amazing, mom did a great job at raising them!!!! Very disappointed at some of the comments about Debra & her family that are very similar to what a "Dirty John" would say.

[@TS-fw6yo]

John Meehan was a Gangsta MS-13 member

[@christschinwon]

Get a room for singles. Put in women who are victims of this kind of abuse. Put in men who are split. The nasty pyscho confident men and nice caring men who just want to give and take care of somebody. There's no doubt it'll be the nice guys huddled together in a corner once the evening is through

[@allysaunooke129]

“We’re the survivors” NO. TERRA is the survivor. You were the one that let him in AGAIN, to hurt your family. Never would I ever ever put my daughter in so much danger. Disgusting.

[@crescentsy]

Ally Saunooke what we’re NOT gonna do is blame the victim just bc she didn’t recognize it earlier. which she did btw but she was taking advice from a therapist that told her not to get away from him

[@alanonimo8979]

No, she's a killer if he wanted to kill anyone he would've killed her in seconds.

[@JizzyRizzy89]

@@crescentsy so after seeing all those papers in the drawer and taking them to 2 other people she hired. she saying that wasn't enough proof. Debra is even more densed than I thought

[@Beautyinthebreakdown.]

Give the women a medal 🥇

[@alexandradenise7461]

It's crazy everyone trashing her for being with John and putting her family in danger. From the outside looking in, it's so much clearer. But when it's you, your life, your decisions and investments. When it's your heart, it's difficult to fully grasp it all. All his lies unfolded more and more but in the end she did leave him and it led to him angrily attacking. It happens all the time. To women afraid to leave. I'm glad they all survived. But it's not her fault.

[@fredajordan5704]

Wonder that any con man, practically any jerk can get over a woman her age. She must think cz she`s in a comfortable life situation life is a game....It`s a pure miravle that Terra even survived this attack. I really can`t see how her kids are so real and down to earth with a mom like Debra.

[@samt3712]

Why does Terra talk like she's deaf

[@bandbporter]

Sumaysa Tahsin she’s not an actress. She’s a girl with ptsd who’s getting a lot of attention for the worst thing that’s ever happened to her. She has no idea how to be in front of a camera like that - how would she?

[@parisayazdani1203]

Watching this made me mad because I couldn’t understand this women. Okay I understand that love is blind and she was manipulated but this man was so disrespectful to her children. Every one except her most forgiving mother on the planet hated him, her children cut her off and yet this man was still more important. That I cannot understand. But I’m glad her daughter is alive.

[@misscorleone3731]

Debra looks like a young version of Betty White / Rose Nylund from Golden Girls...coincidence? 🤔🤔

[@keithsims2328]

Her daughters are badasses for rich girls.

[@emimautx]

She’s a authentic real good person and her mother too.

[@strawberryseason]

I just watched an episode of "Evil Lives Here" about this guy. I am SO angry with the mother!! It's because of her actions that John went after Terra, who could have been killed! It was only luck that the knife fell and Terra could pick it up. I have seen episode after episode of this show, and the dynamics are always the same: a woman ignores signs that a man is a sociopath. How badly do some women want a man? These women will even sacrifice their own children. Pure selfishness.

[@aprendizfeliz6069]

That girl looks like Kelly Clarkson lol

[@paudsmcmack3117]

This week on "The Californians."

[@Misslisasolutions]

I went through this with Raquel Welch's son. He uses her to prey on women.

[@lucyvandervort6191]

Ok I need to know more about this!!!!

[@sweetielady7710]

Ugh. I’m cringing. Around 3:00 when she says “oh you can’t just leave.. I hired a forensic psychiatrist, lawyers, etc.!” That’s great for you Debra, given you have unlimited access to money. I’d love if they would interview someone who can actually relate to the average person, given most people don’t have the money that Debra did to get that kind of help. I lived with an ex who was like John and I tried to leave but had no money and nowhere to go for the longest time. I wonder what she’d suggest for someone who was in a situation like mine. This a good type of story to bring awareness to and it’s a very real issue, but they should’ve done a different story with someone more relatable and sympathetic. Debra really just makes victims look worse.

[@shadesshotgun7939]

The reason she had so much trouble getting rid of him in the first place is that he was after her money... so it's great to have money but it also created a problem for her cause that's all he wanted

[@sweetielady7710]

@@shadesshotgun7939 that’s true, and yes, in some ways money brings more issues. You bring up a fair point but I think that’s a separate issue. My problem is that Debra claims she does all these interviews and stuff to try to “help” other women, but she’s really not being all that helpful by flaunting her wealth and basically acting like you can only safely get out if you have the money to do so. I saw another interview with her where they actually asked her what she would recommend for women who don’t have money, and her response was literally, “well, they’re stuck!” with a giggle. Like gee, thanks Debra, good to know women who aren’t rich like you are basically hopeless.

[@shadesshotgun7939]

@@sweetielady7710 she gave a stupid answer. There are definitely things women without money can do... but those things she'd know nothing about, because he problem was exactly the opposite. If you're a woman without assets, the man is not after your assets... you can go to a shelter or the police, or a church and get help. I definitely think having money and the man being after your money is a more complex problem to have.

[@sweetielady7710]

@@shadesshotgun7939 that’s a very valid point, and it’s actually too bad that Debra didn’t use this platform as a way to bring more awareness to that issue. Like maybe she could have used this as a way to teach wealthy women how to protect their assets, how to look for signs that someone is only after you for your money, etc. I think then I would have more respect for her. Instead, she kind of took this whole “well kinda sucks to be you if you’re poor” approach. I was raised by a dad who was a lot like John, and unfortunately, I was financially dependent on him for so long and shelters and the police wouldn’t help me because they said they only help women escaping intimate partners who are abusive, not parents. That’s why I also was disgusted that they basically praised Arlene for siding with Cindy‘s killer when she was trying to get help, like I feel like this story just gave off the message if you are poor and if you’re trying to get away from an abusive parent, you’re out of luck. It could’ve taken a very different approach.

[@shadesshotgun7939]

@@sweetielady7710 I think the message of her story to women with money was a good one. "Be careful who you allow close you you. Do a criminal background check. Take the relationship slow, don't rush off and get married. Find out who and what this person is about, make sure you understand their intentions and don't overlook red flags. Make sure this person has their own assets so they don't try to steal yours." That's the message I got. I heard it loud and clear! As far as trying to escape from an abusive domestic situation as an abused child in a home without money, I come from this kind of situation myself. There are guidance counselors at schools and police, and social services which can remove the child from.a home if the situation requires... that's how my situation was handled anyway. Also there are churches. The child just has to be willing to talk about it. I think it's alot easier when big money isn't involved... because government and social services are mord willing to help out. When someone does have money, the social service system assumes you can find your own attorneys or your own way out abd they are less likely to assist. Finances definitely complicate abusive situations. But that's just my opinion.

[@shavonstevens2260]

Dude how can the mom say she was proud of the daughter doing the investigating on him but she goes back to him ! She told her I don’t care what he has done im in love ! Wtf

[@Ducati368]

Did she killed John? How could a lady did it on a 6 feet 2 person? I could not imagine!

[@parissshams7192]

I read all the comments here and I dont know why people are judging debra please dont if you think you would done it differently or you know better will good for you keep it to yourself That psychopath was will trained he was professional at what he was doing I cant blam debra for marrying him so fast Love makes people go blind and not see or hear anything This is a good story for all the woman out there trying to find true love going on online dating this helpes to open thiere eyes. debra thank you for sharing your story with us your a strong woman for what you did to public what you being tru and as a woman I'm sorry that happened to you and your family God bless you

[@mujkocka]

The wrong partner is expensive!

[@chicken7173]

Did anyone else come from stephanie??

[@Hugatree1]

Debra is a walking billboard for what not to do. After four marriages that obviously is not your strong point. Why in Gods name go into marriage number 5. No sympathy for this woman at all!

[@Lsa2023]

Wow, no help here. Married wrong person and it was hell to get out

[@Biboche23]

I just binged the Netflix show about this and honestly i see why women fell for him he’s very manipulative a natural born liar. His dad was a scammer too so his dysfunction comes from way earlier in his life. Debra was still kinda clueless and couldn’t see the red flags. But damn even after finding out about all his criminal activities drug addiction she still tried to help him and got back with him despite her family being at odds with that decision. That i cannot understand. Love is blind they all got fooled.Good she got out and that daughter of hers is strong as hell she fought back. That guy was a classic sociopath narcissist liar

[@sarahsevers1]

balbina francesca PY I cant find it on Netflix! Darnit!!

[@justicefernandes2096]

Literally! I honestly didnt really hate him until a couple of episodes in.

[@Ava-cy6qw]

John Meehan was not a killer, he was everything but that.

[@bandbporter]

Pretty sure he killed his dad. And he attempted to kill Terra and was only stopped by a knife through his eye and into his brain. So.... Also, what is your point? Are you the crackhead that he hired to scare Debra in her house?

[@jakedeacon1669]

#ThisYoungWomanFoughtLikeHell