Divorce Attorney EXPOSES why MEN and WOMEN Can't Stay Married ..

[@HardlyInitiated]

👉DATING CARDS: hi.hardlyinitiated.com/datingcards

[@tropicallymixed.]

Wow, smart lawyer. She said something profound that was glossed over. A lot of Black men are not taught how to be husbands.

[@TheBlckPnther]

But women of all races are groomed from a young age on how to be mothers and wives. But we're preparing girls to be the perfect wife to broken immature males??

[@maryarmstrong615]

That’s the root of the problem! Once government assistance made it more fruitful 2 not hav the father in the home, then how can a man watch the example of husband & wife. But it’s so many resources out know that thy can still learn if thy want 2 b a great husband

[@P.I.M.P.720]

Taught how to be a slave🤔😎💯

[@Lo289-im3ip]

@@maryarmstrong615 Man should be married to the wife & stay in the family . That’s a great start to beating the system!

[@BjtheLawyer_]

There are more black men married than black women. Which means most black women don’t even qualify to be considered for a wife! I disagree that most bm not taught to be husbands because from young boys are taught to serve women starting in the dating phase. And then, we taught to take care of a family, however, our female spouse aren’t taught to be wives. Women are taught to be independent & don’t need no man.

[@horacejones7089]

I am a 76 year old Vietnam veteran in my second marriage of 45 years. I was married the first time at age 22 years old to a woman who had a 2 year old son, I was the only daddy He knew. That marriage lasted 5 years. Thus I have 50 years of marriage experience. I have daughter’s 53 years old, 37 years old and a son 33 old. I have grown grandchildren as well. Bottom line, if a man is a good married man, good provider and all of that and is bi sexual and have sex with other men in his marriage, it’s sad and sickening. This makes my stomach hurt. It doesn’t matter if He fulfills all of his marriage duties as a husband. This is unacceptable and He or she needs counseling. It is sad the kind of world we live in and it’s getting worse. I am a Christian man. I am not a saint as I use to be in the streets myself. Marriage is hard and it takes a lot of hard work. However, I rather be married than single if marriage makes sense. I will admit, in this day and time, marriage can be dangerous. I don’t care who says it or we should not judge people regarding their sexual preference, its unnatural for men to lay with men or women to lay with women. Also, you guys need to invite and have the lead attorney on your show. You need to get a male attorney’s view on this subject matter.

[@RipemRissa]

👏🏾 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾💯

[@dianeross4522]

Absolutely to your ENTIRE comment.

[@eebz5]

AMEN ❤️ ✝️ ❤️

[@mscotchery9861]

I agree!

[@sh-rt5dq]

Social media is not destroying any relationships. Ppl are destroying their relationships,stop giving excuses for ppl being immature,unhealed,broken,and fake.

[@tanyabaughn3639]

Faaake!!!

[@smartmouthriveria]

Social media indeed destroys relationships. If not women wouldn't equate liking pictures to cheating. I think it's very wrong to assume social media is innocent of incouraging bad behavior. Nor does social media always work in favor of a relationship

[@AmarisLW]

I get what you're saying. Social media is not destroying relationships. The misuse of social media by people is. It's like it enables people to be more sneaky and deceiving. Opens people up to be contacted and tempted. Thirst traps everywhere. It's all about how we perceive it and USE it. It's just another tool to do good or evil. 🤷‍♀️ You're right. It's a choice.

[@Pumpsandabump]

Yes I hate when ppl say that

[@aboachie1]

​@@smartmouthriveriasocial media is merely a tool. People and how their mentality and emotions manipulate how social media is used. Guns don't kill people. People with the intent to kill people use the guns to do so.

[@poppalance]

Temptations are killing marriages, and the temptors know this. Also, the attitude of "I can do better" or "I deserve better or more" when you already have what you need is another weapon formed against you.

[@CRlifeisgood]

My mom was a traditional woman. Always anticipating my dad's needs. I used to think she was crazy. She would bring my dad's food to his seat while he watched TV every day and iron his clothes and take care of us. And it really upset me that he couldn't even boil an egg. But i am 46 now and i can see now that my dad was working outside the home like hell and now my mom is 70 and she has traveled to places she never imagined, has stability, 2 homes, she never has to worry about food, bills, medical insurance etc. She even gets preventive care and worldwide medical insurance. She gets to live calmly, go to the spa with her daughter, play with her grandkids and such. It doesnt look thay crazy to me anymore. She INVESTED. I took in her steps and my marriage is strong and I am gearing towards a calm and peaceful retirement too. (Obviously pick an emotionally healthy man to start with. But we, women, have more power than we think in our own outcome , if we just humble ourselves enough sometimes and think a little long term too.)

[@TheLuvlfe]

Well said! I hope to be that wife someday as well!

[@BlkOnyx0508]

This is 2023. Be careful 😂

[@Mook05]

​@@BlkOnyx0508nonsense. She said it is working in her marriage right NOW.

[@Liyaxs]

Theoretically this is the ideal. The problem today is the abundance of broken people, men in particular due to the economy and the standards of being a “husband” in the traditional sense, being out of reach. I hope you find someone who can give you the life you watched your parents live.

[@argentinabarnett3594]

I was married for 10 years and had a 7 years of sexless marriage. I stayed in the marriage because I loved him. I was finally fed up because he didn’t want to get help in resolving the problem. I was patient and he even gave me permission to sleep with someone else. I just wanted my husband. I refused to stay in an emotionally abusive marriage. I asked for a divorce after counseling. I’m glad I left that abusive marriage. I am happier today!

[@flexicus1105]

I take it you mean he had ED. What exactly made it emotionally abusive?

[@blessedson69]

Madness

[@agreatmannamedlieu]

That's not abuse, and sex is your duty to HIM. Not the other way around.

[@lala5061]

​@@agreatmannamedlieuwho told u that bahahahaha 😂

[@lala5061]

​​@flexicus1105 nah u can't assume ed is the problem! Alot of times guys just don't have the attraction to u anymore especially if things are not well or if some other things are going on can effect his ability to have sex ...i would need to know the age and other info cuz it's not always ed trust and believe, yall just like to think that for everything 😂 but dont be fooled!

[@jailowe30]

Rob said in his first marriage his mindset was I got her….. I don’t have to do too much. My ex-husband had that same mindset….in counseling he said he thought that his only responsibility in the marriage was to NOT cheat…….. not provide for the family, not support and love my wife……just not cheat……and that’s ALL he did….not cheat…… he’s leaving A LOT on the table 🙄. He did ABSOLUTELY nothing!!!

[@keepitahunnid7133]

So he had to ONLY be with one woman and do all that other stuff. Phuck that!

[@Joey_Lance]

What did you do? What did you bring?

[@melaninmoxiellc963]

​@josephbriggs6504 Even if she did nothing, it would make them equal in footing since he contributed nothing.

[@judithjackson1086]

All men think that get complicit

[@grahamwilliams935]

I'm sure you knew his character and how he was raised before making a huge decision such as marriage. It baffles me that women don't communicate and learn their partner before jumping the broom. It's seems that the blame goes strictly to the man, and no blame goes towards the women. A woman's biggest excuse is "I was young" That excuse is entirely old and played out. There are many of examples and results out here that provide knowledge for couples making the proper decisions when it comes to marriage.😮

[@mariagilliam6783]

In my personal opinion….. when it comes to social media being a factor in divorce or impacting relationships…. We as individuals, have the CHOICE & FREE WILL to engage or disengage. The bottom line is DISCIPLINE. If you create and appetite for something that is what your flesh is going to crave. Become disciplined and everything else will follow. 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

[@angelhampton4365]

Are you married currently? Not out of shade I'm honestly asking because even without marriage it's definitely a choice however social media has changed our social structure so even if you aren't in touch with it or disciplined societys mentality is attached to it. Instead of learning in the age of having more information than the generations before we act out of fear and selfishness... We've used it on fear base instead of empathetically based... We should have more love and empathy ever considering what we know instead we use it as weapons against each other

[@mariagilliam6783]

@@angelhampton4365 I totally agree with your comment 100%. Thank you 🙏🏽 for sharing it.

[@P.I.M.P.720]

And self control.

[@NalaMahal]

I recommend anyone to read “Stolen Focus…” by Johann Hari. There’s a chapter in that book that discusses how the explosion of social media has desensitized and made our society less empathetic. The engineers who helped develop a lot of these platforms have noticed this trend early on and have also seen the affects on themselves. So the impact of social media goes beyond ruining romantic relationships, it has changed how we socially interact, our attention spans, and how we collectively view life. If you’ve noticed, there’s little to no regard for human life in this country. The book also touched on how many of these engineers have forbidden their children from using social media or worse, committed suicide over knowing the damage that they contributed. Social media was originally intended to be good, it no longer is.

[@HardlyInitiated]

Wow. Great suggestions

[@digthewarmth]

Wow, that's really horrible that they feel they caused so much damage. I didn't realize how bad it is for us. Thank you for the suggestion.

[@theactualfactsofwu-sabat2818]

Thank you!! I will check that out

[@aboachie1]

Thanks for that recommendation. I need a new book to read.

[@angelhampton4365]

Big Facts... We can all disagree on the extent of that however to deny it's impact period is wild... Like business alone should show the impact... Business was made a breeze through social media and at this point it's at a dark place... It went from entertainment and word of mouth being heightened to spiritual, mental and phycological warfare

[@breakuplawyer]

Thank you for having me! The conversation is always meaningful and informative. I can’t wait to come back! 💜

[@Bgazader]

Babikak you did so well. I am so proud of you. You are so knowledgeable and know your craft. Continue to be you. 😊😊

[@tropicallymixed.]

You dropped a lot of gems. I hope to see you on future podcasts.

[@flo-dd5sw]

You were so awesome, a valuable asset.

[@LakeshaSanders]

Hey there queen me and my partner needs therapy baddd

[@Twiceborn3000]

Thank you for your gift of studying ‘their’ euro-Greco-Roman system of marriage … It’s clearly ‘their’ construct / contract and system … upon global & historical research with people of color in ‘our’ indigenous and cultural roots we don’t have the many issues that was discussed

[@tuushietime]

A man who lies to himself & his woman, Broke his marriage vows and his home/family, Exposes his woman to disease & potential Death, Gained in life by Using her time, body and energy while living a double life but demanded her loyalty.... This is Not a "Good Man"

[@joyceg7859]

!!!!! I was too exhausted n worn out mentally to type this !!!!! Thank you!!!!

[@middletonl1737]

I agree. They don’t care about themselves let alone their wives or kids.

[@joscelyntownsell9367]

Straight up 💯…this is exactly how some people behave (both men and women)

[@NewLifeJourney24]

Exactly why I'm out! He never deserved me!

[@quathetruth8314]

She’s right. We are more equipped with resources to have long lasting faithful relationships with our significant others. We just have a low tolerance level for ourselves and others. That’s my goal this year is to have more tolerance with the human race. I can be a very no nonsense kind of person. But she woke me up to realize that we are self sabotaging expecting perfection. I think social media plays into that delusional aspect where we think our man or woman should be this this that and if it’s off it ain’t it. This is why we need more God and less idols.

[@cocoblessings]

YES!!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@TheBlckPnther]

Amen sis/bro!!!

[@bigtank6465]

That's true but there's something deeper at play.. 80 years ago Laws, Social Practices, & women Not having access to decent paying jobs is what made it possible to sustain relationships long term. Relationships are ultimately about Survival. When a woman forms a Union with a Man, it's because she Has to do it to keep a roof over her head & food in her mouth. Today the laws have changed.. And it's no longer shameful for a woman to be Unmarried with children, & women have access to better paying jobs in addition too Child Support/Welfare. So the current "system" no longer undergirds long term relationships. It actually encourages women to remain single because now, they can get Provision without being in Union with a Man. Social Media is simply given us access to more people.

[@t.l1357]

I've unfortunately divorced some yrs ago without a lawyer. In my situation we had already done counseling and many yrs of trying to work through issues and amicabky split. We decided how property and assets were split and didn't do any forms of support orders. It worked extremely well for us and we have stayed very amicable since the divorce. I wouldn't recommend doing this if one person is trying to block or hide assets or support. If yall can figure out how to stay married, plz do it. Its the most painful thing I've endured and we did it uncontested. I'm still praying to see healthy and lasting marriages.

[@tamigage2537]

Did he say, if a woman had a good husband who is having a relationship with the opposite sex?? My question is, If a husband is having a relationship with ANYONE, is he a good husband???????

[@sisterkamilah4373]

When you marry a narcissist there’s no other option than divorce. Those type don’t change. I would have loved to work things out with my ex-husband but there was just no way. I’m still watching this video and I haven’t heard mention of being married to one. They’re not normal but can really have you fooled until the mask slips. 😢

[@NewLifeJourney24]

@sisterkamilah4373 Yes, this right here. I was in my marriage for life, but after his mask fell off, I found out things he hid for years. There's no coming back from that. With 4 children is hard, but I would rather be alone with my babies than to deal with that bs. It's torture.

[@michellejeter3895]

Divorced a man I truly loved because he was physically abusive. It was identified as an irreconcilable differences 20+ years ago. This man has an inside/outside the house personality. Wonderful person outside of the home....sad but true

[@angelhampton4365]

Physical abuse is absolutely a reason to divorce and I'm glad you got out of that

[@quathetruth8314]

He probably grew up with that same energy as a child.

[@ratchetike787]

Same. I identified it as irreconcilable differences so to not drag it all out. Definitely an inside/outside personality situation. So many different things fit into that “irreconcilable differences” that’s not as simple as “we grew apart”

[@JessGoris]

@@angelhampton4365I’m assuming it would have been difficult to prove the physical abuse, so irreconcilable differences was easier to get themselves out of that situation swiftly.

[@realestatecoach8626]

That’s called a Narcissist!

[@tbbgerardo]

Marriage is a covenant not a contract. Lawyers would not want that because it cuts them out. They can write up the other document to make sure their wives are covered (will, estate planning, etc ..). The difference is they set up those things outside the court system and are not subject to whatever a judge or divorce attorney determination.

[@mohasnomoreftg]

Tyshon… has never been married. Period. His perspective is skewed. You cannot speak on something you’ve never experienced. When you get married and divorced, then speak on it. He’s talking like a single young man who has never experienced a long term relationship/ marriage.

[@ce4139]

He sounds mad ignorant. I’ve noticed that on a lot of these episodes. Needs to work on being a better listener and comprehending what is being said by his guests even if he doesn’t “agree.”

[@stephaniehernandez_90]

They needed to have his perspective for counter dialogue.

[@mohasnomoreftg]

And sometimes infidelity is just that… sometimes there are people both men and women who cannot be faithful to no fault of the other party. Period.

[@pkp6791]

Exactly. Cheating is a character flaw that does not change. It is baked into the value system of certain people. They hide it and carry on about their business-- until they get caught and turn everyone's world upside down.

[@Beeriteback]

From a woman’s perspective, I feel like women will pretend to be happy, but have unmet expectations, and just expect their husband to know all while plotting a new life in their head waiting for the right opportunity to split 😂. I’ve seen/heard it too many times. I think this is what Tysean was getting at lol. All the ladies aren’t innocent!! 🙃

[@Heyu7her3]

Because women are taught to know what a man wants/ needs/ etc. But the women you speak of were likely missing the relative ease and freedom of their single life.

[@s.e.t1579]

1:45:53 some men (because I don’t believe this is ALL), but a good majority may love the benefits of the helpmate, but deep down don’t have respect for said helpmate. That’s why comments such as “you’ve been riding on my income” or variations of that are able to be spoken. Deep down the respect isn’t there.

[@angelhampton4365]

I think it's both sides... A woman doesn't truly respect a man in a lower financial position for longevity

[@Heyu7her3]

​@@angelhampton4365: that's moreso incompatibility around "ambition".

[@s.e.t1579]

@@Heyu7her3 Right!

[@osa9354]

1:49:00 I think what she was trying to relay that the “help meet” title that is meant to be beneath the role of husband but prized position as a wife/woman is the same attitude/mind set that is causing tension in marriages especially in a era where women are finding their voices/power

[@rhargrow8399]

I am on my second marriage, the problems are very very very different. None of them are the same. Men start out very romantic and fun then they change for either the better or the worse. They are not trying to be accountable to anyone: God, their bestie, or their wife

[@Justritamich]

I don’t agree with the “househusband “. I worked for a female doctor. Her husband stayed at home with the girls. He ran the house. He made the decision to quit his job so the girls wouldn’t go to daycare. And her job paid more. That decision has to be accompanied by an understanding.

[@angelhampton4365]

This is the one and this applies to housewives as well

[@kathleenreece1034]

I do not understand when a man asks the woman to leave the house. I do not believe another woman is wise to get involved with a man who feels comfortable having her leave.

[@SuperReasonabledoubt]

Leave before someone gets physically hurt

[@icesport2107]

There are some people that are thirty years old and still behave like children.. Marriage is for grown folks.

[@tyrellpatterson]

I love the space and the facilitation fellas. Just some feedback from a host to another, being mindful when you have a woman on and you have a disagreement make sure she isn’t left on an island to defend her stance and truly facilitate the conversation. The moment you feel strongly about something keep the energy conversational because although most know it’s just passion it can come off disregarding and it’s good that one could play mediator and give unbiased dialogue but I picked up on her facial expressions and she handled her own but it was definitely noticeable. Keep the great content coming but just being mindful it’s 3 gents to one woman and keeping guest engaged and communicating more. Also the silver bearded bro?! My guy was giving geeeeems. And acknowledging the HEAT he was giving all the free game and saving singles before they CHOOSE marriage because to keep it a buck, that is where it starts. Much love gents.

[@sallyhemings2295]

Excellent feedback! Also…they are 🗣️YELLING into those mics 🎙️

[@Heyu7her3]

​@@sallyhemings2295 😅 idk why the "men with mics" be having mics when all they do is yell anyway

[@sallyhemings2295]

@@Heyu7her3 right! Like damn we hear you!🙄🤣

[@PLTbyCormie]

It’s almost like he doesn’t understand that divorce IS the final extreme in a relationship. The very nature of divorce tells you people are walking away because they have given up because they have exhausted everything. Who wants to raise kids by themselves? If she sees that as the only way what does that tell you about what she was dealing with in that marriage? OMG listening to these conversations is exhausting because they really just don’t get it..from my experience..every single break up led to something better.

[@coreymjones3]

I left. I will not stay with a woman who cheats. Takes up too much mental space to stay

[@icesport2107]

Marriage is more than looks and money. Marriage is like a job. Dating is like an interview. Your experience in life is your resume.. You have to love your work in order to be a success.

[@rogerringold616]

Is she attractive to a blind man? Or only to a man w eyes? Lights off...5 ft away....talk to her...do you think she nice/warm/caring/ respectful/ worth taking bullets for? Or just great sex/ and body ...poison attitude and foul mouth?

[@rogerringold616]

Cant make a wife be a good wife.

[@rogerringold616]

Men arent taught to be husbands ?! 1:11:12 WOMEN ARENT TAUGHT to even tell the truth...be honest/ loyal. Alwsys flirting on public....attention seeker...if attention giver gets her money/ gifts too? She will cheat...emotionally 1st/ then in person.

[@rogerringold616]

Kevin Samuels....😢

[@rogerringold616]

Men stay women file 80% of the divorces 90% females w degrees.

[@ladyjei]

I was married to a bisexual man that was 15 years older than me and had a kid already with him when I finally found out that he was boinking everything with legs. 2 years in I found out. I was young and naive and the ONLY person that asked me if I was sure that I wanted to marry him was his sassy on the side AT MY WEDDING. That long standing bf was the only one with the balls to tell me the truth 2 years in. That’s when ALL the messy came to light and he’d been so active with tons of partners and I had no idea. It was so sad cuz he really did hate himself and had so much shame he couldn’t reconcile.

[@GodBlessTheChild1]

I’m not going for that “I was young and naive” excuse. All of us were young and naive. You were not focused or even paying attention to that person. Rarely have I not been able to tell a man was not a man. “Thank You!” for sharing ❤️🖤💚

[@MADMPrecious]

We are so broken as a people

[@queenbee7671]

Thank you for sharing I'm in something similar to that right now and I'm just mind-blowing been with my husband for 23 years thank you

[@AnnaE-nf6cw]

Yes, I would Want a pre-nup.

[@AnnaE-nf6cw]

No No. If we marry we Must have a marriage certificate.

[@melaniemeans3240]

I LOVE the direction you guys have been going lately.!! Speaking on nuances , taboo topics and bringing in SOUND advice from great representatives of the black community.! You guys need to get more coverage…!!

[@youngjaki]

With the DL husband who is a good provider, etc., I still could not stay. I'd be heartbroken, but I would have to protect my health. ❤

[@toppagirl]

I agree. I can’t deal with a 💩tty di@k. Not sorry!

[@rogerringold616]

Same opposite scene...Id be disgusted embarrassed for being tricked deceived. Big big angry.

[@melaninmoxiellc963]

There's no such thing as a good man who's deceptive and manipulates a woman's response and ability to choose what's best for her by withholding potentially dealbreaking information for the sake of his ego. That is a deep seeded character flaw and integrity issue that disqualifies his status as good, no matter how much of a provider he is.

[@maishaaddai1052]

Health reasons were completely skipped over being that those types of relations can more than likely end up with dire health consequences. Also, the partner that prefers males may prefer other acts over “regular” intimacy

[@ajag57]

@@melaninmoxiellc963🔥💯

[@alonzobarnes302]

Marriage contracts should be have time limits. 5-10 years contracts that have to be renewed and the terms are renegotiated each time.

[@patricejackson6981]

Excellent podcast. Loved how intelligent and knowledgeable Brittany is❤

[@shellshudson2658]

She is golden! Very impressive.

[@jodyrose7425]

I can see both senarios, but I do agree with Tysean saying most likely the man has always been that way, because if I am being honest with myselft I am in that situation with a man that Ryan just expalined, but he was like that in the beginning, and in my head I was looking at his potential and not the reality of what it is.

[@julietjones5011]

I concur with everything the Smart attorney said, I am a divorce Attorney in NY and have seen similar issues. Great Job Guys

[@_LejoelIG]

Episode on Polygamy & Arranged Marriages with Spousal Customized Agreements. Great Episode!!!

[@bella28498]

Rule number 1 do not trust these men. Double lives are more common than not.

[@MaryHudson-dt4gu]

But so many women and men are going to say their going to still trust them😢

[@jodynanci]

I’m shocked by her data about men not leaving their wives who cheat. I always thought it was the other way around

[@jani1321]

and it is the other way around...

[@angelhampton4365]

I'm a wife and I'm here to tell you they don't however they equate your infidelity way different from theirs... No matter the case... But let's be real here... Women don't either... Most women take a lot before they leave and or cheat...

[@Heyu7her3]

Idk I wouldn't be surprised if it's because they don't know how to file paperwork...

[@keepitahunnid7133]

Ni66as don"t want to lose half of they ish. Cheaper to keep her.🤷🏾‍♂️

[@Justice098]

I’m a man and it’s definitely the other way around for me. I would leave quick. I have did it before. Kicked her out. Once she’s been tampered with…why am i providing and protecting her for? I’m not paying for that. She’s messing around on my dime. The guy she’s been giving herself to should become her new protector.

[@Adore7_AUM]

A lot of states don't allow "at-fault divorce," in several states the only option is "no fault divorce" or "irreconcilable differences" which is why so many people use that to get a divorce.

[@emanipettiford868]

I would like the aspect of another benefit of a husband who truly cherishes his wife provides her with protection of social validation and with that peace of mind of her value in his life on a spiritual level.

[@shellshudson2658]

What’s going on, Tysean? 👀 He is taking her around the mulberry brush but her argument is solid and consistent. (Demonstrates professional skills as a lawyer!)

[@MsLady-gb3gy]

❤ Facts ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@harvemedharvemed7796]

I cheated on my husband, and he would not have divorced me if I could stay and take the verbal, mentally, and physical abuse before and after cheating.

[@tanyabaughn3639]

Right

[@pkp6791]

In my experience---Unlike far too many women, most men won't be able to stay in a marriage after a wife's infidelity. Many women will stay. I never understood that, but realize we all have to do what works for us. At first whiff of cheating ( of any kind), I take it as an instructional on who Im dealing with and check out from that person-- permanently. It simply doesn't align with my values.

[@harvemedharvemed7796]

@pkp6791 I agree with everything you said, and I tormented myself, as I have never cheated before or after.

[@tanyabaughn3639]

@@pkp6791 thank you, people are so dismissive today, I can’t stand it

[@jodynanci]

Ahhhhh the catch 22

[@rochestergray4809]

Let's be real, one of the reasons guys aren't filing because they don't want to pay half! It's not in our advantage if they file or if we file, either way it's money down the drain

[@jodynanci]

I would think the guy would leave and have a whole other life and then the wife files for divorce

[@rochestergray4809]

@@jodynanci That could be the case, I’m thinking of it from the path of least resistance. Most people don’t rush to pay a bill early, they wait until they have to. People want to secure the life boat and fully jump ship after.

[@rogerringold616]

2:14:26 quickest way to hurt men is denied child access WHILE TAKING HIM TO THE CLEANERS...and he was actually a good husband.

[@filmadcamp1512]

@@rogerringold616 Child access isn't the issue. A lot of times men want access to the child in order to have access to the mother. Joint physicall custody is what is important. And this can only be accomplished if the man sets up his work schedule to accomodate having a child with him for half the time, purchases a place to live with a room for the children, meet with teachers, meet with doctors, learn what is going on with your child so that shared custody is more feasible.

[@BlkOnyx0508]

Pay half of what? Where are these alleged “wealthy” men with so much generational wealth to lose

[@JessGoris]

A divorce should not be looked at as who can win. It should be looked at as what’s best for the child (since children are usually involved). If children are not involved, split everything that was gathered during the marriage. I don’t understand the overt pettiness and nastiness of a lot of people during a divorce. I’m speaking as an adult who was the mediator between my parents’ divorce due to the fact that they couldn’t handle themselves civilly, especially my dad.

[@Promiseland2024]

This is such a great conversation that i think would be sooooo helpful if a counseling session would mimic this. At 1:07 mark where he speaks on being a leader.. is a great starting point to review what beliefs each person has as far as roles, expectations, desires, etc.. great information...

[@FitBritt06]

I have a friend that got married have kids and take care of the house. His wife doesn’t have to work he pays for nanny. They said they was going to stay together because of the kids until 18. He never been with a man but had conversations. Him and his wife doesn’t have sex unless having a child. I found out all this cause she was cheating on him but now I know why and why he wasn’t mad. She’s keeping his secret. Her father is a preacher and her husband is over the youth. So i know he’s holding up a certain look.

[@brownsugga2584]

smh sad....

[@belfanm5081]

The secret is coming out

[@AmarisLW]

WOW

[@justcallmebon2684]

He had more than talks

[@iammarlishia5233]

Wow that’s crazy

[@SherryMoore-ij1qc]

I watched male family and friends go through the court system and I can tell you it does favor women .This lawyer dances around the questions when it comes to men .

[@Heyu7her3]

Family courts supposedly "favoring" women is still eons better than men automatically being given custody in the divorce and the women being made absolutely destitute. That's what used to happen before all the sweeping reforms.

[@chinneynz7861]

No way! Only if the woman makes little to no money. I am a black (African) woman in USA. I make $155,000/yr while my long-time husband who didn't have the same drive as myself makes $55,000. How does this favor me? I stay because i want our kids to have a stable life but I hate that he has zero drive.

[@rentmane]

Exactly. She's a liar.

[@filmadcamp1512]

Well I've seen people go through it as well and I have seen the opposite. I know a lot of women who have had to pay their husbands half of the house that they themselves (Wives) were paying for. I know men who got full custody of their kids. In the U.S., 60% of men who file for custody receeive it. That's a good number.

[@RipemRissa]

CLEARLY SHE’S A SELLOUT NOT BEING 💯 TO NOT AFFECT HER INCOME.🤦🏾‍♀️

[@brittanyblack9503]

This was a really good video. Just gained a subscriber! Although I disagree with both show guests, especially the attorney (although I think she made great points, I just disagree with several), I think they revealed something very important, and that’s going into marriage be sure you’re on the same page about what marriage is to you. Ideally it’s good to be on the same page before getting married, but at least during marriage there should be a conversation if you mistakenly get married without ever even defining “marriage” with your spouse. In my opinion, marriage is NOT a contract, it’s a covenant. And getting a divorce is breaking your word “for sickness or in health, for richer or for poorer, for better OR FOR WORSE, til DEATH do you part”. Period. I’ve been married 12 years now, and have learned a lot about the depth of what keeping that kind of promise actually means. And it’s super hard, but is possible to do and be happy and have boundaries and enjoy your marriage along the way. I’m against loveless marriages and just staying married for the sake of it, but for me, that means do something in your marriage to shift it. And one person can stand for marriage in such a way that the marriage is restored eventually to overwhelming health and happiness, instead of lovelessness until death. I’m not in a contract that can be broken, I’m in a promised commitment to God that I’ll love his son (my husband) until I’m dead or my husband is. And I believe anything, including the heaviest of marital problems can be overcome with love. I believe love (not the romantic kind, but the patient, kind, humble, not keeping recording of wrongs, hopeful, enduring all, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 etc kind) can conquer ANYTHING, so leaving’s always a free will option, but that’s not the only thing that can force circumstances to change. If you believe like that, it’s best to find someone who agrees or otherwise not get married. Otherwise, go ahead and enter into marriage like a “business contract” and see how that kind of foundation will work when a storm hits. Especially storms like abuse, adultery, addiction, and abandonment 😔❤️‍🩹 And if you’re someone who believes marriage should be treated like a business contract of terms of commitment, then be sure you marry someone who sees the marriage that way, so you’re on the same page too.

[@MeyahMoor]

When I say that was awesome and definitely needed to be said Thanks 🥰🥰🥰💜

[@pattrav488]

You can only fight for it to work so long , alone.😢

[@SanctifiedLady]

I’m getting married and we aren’t getting divorced… but I’m going to do pre relationship counseling , during dating counseling, pre marital counseling….. prenups, during nups and post nups!! He keep his, I keep mine and we split ours. We are going to divide responsibilities equally in the marriage so we both can have the same energy to bring to the relationship. ❤🤞🏽

[@rogerringold616]

She reneg on what she said....he called her on it...she DOUBLE TALKING..GASLIGHTING 57:43

[@rogerringold616]

She just showed the radioactive BS that women use w men. 57:20. Giving your brothers?! Women are more guilty of supporting the WORSE BEHAVIORS of females NEVER TRUTH/ACCOUNTABLE TO EACH OTHER.

[@laverne604]

I disagree with her. Relationships are different related to income dynamics. Women leave abusive relationships. Previously, they could not leave related to women's lack of finances.

[@middletonl1737]

That’s what the Attorney said

[@sh-rt5dq]

Let Sis just give divorce advice,bcuz she is not a expert in psychology, sociology,mental health. Let ppl stay in their lane

[@nnena3631]

Right because she lost me several times like blaming women for why men are DL stating that bc they don't feel comfortable with women's perception of them they hide who they are, Marry and have children. They knew their truth but voluntarily destroyed several lives. That's it. They are Americans the US is the safest most inclusive place to express your sexuality. If you choose to feign heterosexuality font blame women for that.

[@AngelaElikya]

​@@nnena3631 That's not what she said at all you heard what you wanted to hear.

[@nnena3631]

@@AngelaElikya Rewatch from 29:51

[@Bgazader]

She never said she was an expert in psychology. The topic is divorce, which is her craft.

[@tbbgerardo]

The divorce attorney had a negative bias against men. When asked about men starting off with 50% custody in Florida she immediately went to how incapable men are in terms of caring for their child/children; as if those same men could not learn the foods their kids eat, take them to doctor appointments, etc....

[@JessGoris]

She also said her client’s ex husband who was the stay at home parent, received child support and alimony because her client (the woman), did not know the kids’ teachers, where to take them to their doctor appts, etc. So no, it didn’t come across to me that she had a bias against men.

[@growthrulove]

Isn't 50% custody a good thing? Most men complain about not being able to see their children at all after divorce. So, how is a man having 50% custody a bad thing? That means both parents are involved, and the truth is that most men are not as involved as women in the daily day to day care of children, but that's not taking away from those that are, they are exceptions.

[@joshuamancarter]

Most men are incapable of the day to day rearing of a child/children. No lies told

[@DrMosesIsHere]

​@Trombonegoddess86 May be true in that case. I know many great men that are remarried and it's a deep dive trying to get information that should be shared, especially when the child is out-of-state. Tip for fathers. Ensure your parenting agreement includes you to be named as emergency contact on school and shared medical decision-making. Call and email teachers regularly and ensure you are notified on everything. Schools should provide a parent portal to see grades. Download all medical records. This is bare minimum if a man wants anything near fair treatment in court for anything related to the child.

[@JessGoris]

@@DrMosesIsHere my dad had custody of my sister, lived out of state, and it was the same situation for my mom. It was like pulling teeth to get any information that you would think a parent should have. Contact number to reach my sister, her school name, etc. My father and his new wife did not think it was my mother’s business to have that stuff. I know this because I was an adult, so I was very aware of what was happening. So your advice is good for any parent who doesn’t have primary custody.

[@Tpres1420]

Love this episode! Not married just like to hear the ins and outs, I think an episode on long term committed relationship without marriage would be a great one as well.

[@larabraver]

Muslims sometimes have a religious/spiritual marriage ceremony called a Nikkah and choose not to do a legal marriage for various reasons. You can still sign medical directives if you want them to have a say in medical decisions, you can have financial agreements, etc.

[@Heyu7her3]

​@@larabraverthat's the same as marrying in a church without signing the certificate. but what legal recorse does the woman have in separation? How do they get added into benefits?

[@larabraver]

@@Heyu7her3 The Nuptial Agreement can stipulate these like a pre-nup and be legally enforceable. However, this arrangement is probably best for a woman with her own substantial assets or or when both have older kids and established estates that would be complicated to commingle.

[@lala5061]

Don't do it it won't end well! Trust me 😒 we don't need an episode on that just understand that's not a good thing...unless she has no relationship with God and u don't either then u good! 😒

[@blkyogi999]

A man and woman are very different when it comes to exploratory sex… nope… I don’t want anything to do with a man that disclosed that to me. Nah, just No!!!!

[@ladynottingham89]

A lot of men think the “helpmate” role is an inferior one and that’s their view of women. You’re here to help ME achieve MY dreams and My goals. You’re my peon. If it isn’t viewed that way them why is a man who takes on that role viewed as less-than by other men? I’m glad she called it out.

[@ashleeelmore3638]

I agree 100%! Find someone who doesn’t want to work but don’t make a blanket statement like that.

[@jailowe30]

That piece that Britney said about marriage being a contract and it’s bad to go into a business relationship with someone you know may be a bad investment……. 🤯🤯🤯. Had I framed my thinking about marriage like THAT….. I probably never would have gotten married……REAL TALK…… but I got my daughter out of this union……so it is what it is….. but that statement hit me!!!

[@rogerringold616]

Big talk...real. contracts. Yet HOLY MATRIMONY IS A COVENANT WITH GOD... YOU THEM under Gods rules.. Is way way more serious...body mind spirit.... then God joly spirit or satan evil spirit leads you. No neutral. .

[@aashleyainlong4191]

Unh uh if you had thought about marriage correctly you would have looked for a spouse that understood the assignment and was moving in the ways of life loving and functioning both short term and long term in the same direction that you were. 😊

[@RipemRissa]

@@aashleyainlong4191EXACTLY-THAT’S THE ACTUAL REASON WHY PEOPE “CAN’T “ STAY MARRIED.💯 EVERYTHING ELSE THEY’RE USING TO REASON IS JUST THE AFFECTS OF THE LACK OF THE FOUNDATION IT SHOUKD BE BASED ON.

[@RipemRissa]

@@aashleyainlong4191REMEMBER THAT THIS IS COMING FROM A PERSON THAT BENEFITS FROM DIVORCES, IT’S FROM HER PROFESSION/WORLDLY MINDSET THAT RULES HER STANCE. NOT A COVENANT BASED ON A GODLIKE RITEOUSNESS REASONING.🙏🏾…

[@RipemRissa]

THAT’S WHY SPOUSES ARE SO EASILY SEPARATED BECAUSE IT’S SOMETHING THAT THEY BROUGHT TOGETHER, NOT GOD.💯 SO YOU HAVE PEOPLE STAYING IN A MARRIAGE UNDER A “1 RULE RELIGION” TALKING BOUT “I MADE AN OATH TO GOD NOT TO DIVORCE” AS A CRUTCH/WARPED MINDSET/MANIPULATION ETC. BUT DON’T HONOR THE OATH IN WAYS THAT WERE ORDERED.🤦🏾‍♀️ WHOLE TIME GOD AINT BROUGHT IT TOGETHER, DAMAGED AND OR UNEQUALLY YOLKED PEOPLE DID SO STOP FEELING GUILTY OF DIVORCING IF THAT’S THE CASE. FEEL GUILTY FOR NOT DOING IT AS IT WAS INTENDED, TO BE EVERLASTING. LIKE GOD’S LOVE -WHEN HIS COMMANDMENTS ARE AT WORK-RIGHT? RIGHT.

[@sonjadf47]

BOTH of my parents raised and participated in my brother and I. Any adult should be able to raise children. Suppose your wife passed? My friend raised all six of his children because his wife has a drinking problem. The children ages were 2 years to 16 years of age. I had a high regard for him.

[@moedollas8265]

I wish yall had time stamps on the topics

[@HardlyInitiated]

Give us til the end of the day today. We got you!

[@Camerashy03]

@@HardlyInitiated thank you!!

[@curtb775]

I just came across this channel recently this is one of the best relationship divorce child support discussions I've heard in a long long time 💯👍🏾

[@hopetale]

Men stays when wife cheat as it shows them that their wife is still a prize to be won. Wife leaves their cheating husband as they feel they are no longer the prize.

[@Indigobliss7]

Any entity dictated by a government license/certificate whether marriage or birth certificate is a ward of the state and the state. You can ABSOLUTELY create your own covenant contracts that are legally binding.

[@mistahjay8598]

His advice is about as good as Steve Harvey being divorced twice already, 😂

[@filmadcamp1512]

Don't forget Kevin Samuels.

[@gabrielomondi4630]

The wrong combination of personality and character types is often the problem. There needs to be a lot more education and information on this

[@veeboss4853]

Like I said in the last episode. Both people have to put in the WERK! If a man/woman just want to keep things how it is (50/50 contribution, not helping, cheating, etc.) and not want to change for the betterment of the family, after communicating what is needed. Yes, I’m gone!

[@yaalove3736]

He can put you in the will, he can put you on the feed and he can put you as the beneficiary on life insurance but as soon as he gets mad, he reserved the right to change all of that and in marriage you can’t just take bake things bc of how you feel so with all due respect if we are agreeing to marry we will be legally married❤.

[@BlkOnyx0508]

He can do the same while married😂

[@smithrh100]

She gave the political answer to the question would you knowingly date a man if he experimented with same sex. The answer is HELL NO! he done had a taste at that point and mostly they always go back to do more experimenting.

[@Lightwght]

The attorney keeps saying majority of the divorces are happening because of men being verbally, emotionally, physically abusive, and infidelity. My question to her, would be. How many of these women are verbally abusive to their husbands? A lot women have a boss chick mentality that is covered up by I'm a strong woman and the man is not fulfilling his duties in a marriage. The excuses on why a woman can't pleasure her partner is BS. In a relationship and especially a marriage it's a duty for both partners to pleasure one another unless there is an extreme illness that prevents this from happening.

[@rhargrow8399]

Not staying, that is unhealthy spiritually, physically and mentally Need to tell each other upfront, how you are, what you want and how you feel

[@akuafayettegoosesense]

I agree marriage should be a contract designed by the two people while in “ love” how should it end if certain things “ happen” the vows should be I WILL and I Won’t ..I have over fifty years in marriage love and happiness was our motto ...things change Depressions sets in .....work out means two people want to make it happen..if one doesn’t then that’s when the contract serves the best purpose written in love and in tolerance ...there must be a LINE that one should not cross at least no more than twice....I’m writing a book in the near future... there are marriages that go far too long ..there should be a “ overhaul and checking point every 10 or 20 years....

[@DoItAgainA]

I feel like y’all could have handled the attorney guest better… your other guest seemed to have more of an open mind and heart to what she had to say

[@nnena3631]

The lawyer was covering her practice and her brand. Much of what she was saying was male identified and placating to be honest.

[@Heyu7her3]

​@@nnena3631 What parts were "male-identified"?

[@BjtheLawyer_]

I agree. I do not believe all 70% of divorces filed by women are divorcing because they are either cheated on or physically or verbally abused. Also, I never understood the logic of leaving for financial reasons! Because if yah struggling together. I can’t imagine how your financial situation would get better if you’re not solely responsible for all the bills!

[@charlenerobinson2965]

I agree with Tyshon, whether bisexual or not, man on man is “gay”.

[@belfanm5081]

Agree

[@johnbarnes519]

Yep so two men and a woman is a train n not a threesome in a man’s eyes also🤷🏾‍♂️

[@iammarlishia5233]

Agree

[@AngelaElikya]

​@@johnbarnes519 that's only because you think of women as being inferior 😂

[@latashaepps1060]

He'll yeah my dad was in the dl, my mom left the day she caught him and NEVER turned back. I work in Healthcare and hiv is still prevalent for women ages 25 and up due to dl men. It's wrong and risky.

[@fit2bjustme]

Men do not get divorced if they are the problem/cheater because why would they? If they can keep their wife and the side piece, they will do so. If there is a divorce, she/the wife initiates it because of that husband/man and his infidelity. On the flip side, if a faithful husband has a cheating wife.......he is most definitely leaving the marriage.

[@pkp6791]

REPETITIVE? Most men won't tolerate ONE episode of cheating from a wife. I dont blame them. Unless cheating aligns with one's values, it is a deal breaker.

[@shaynia-shai]

1:45:40 - its the same things in reverse. His views is toxic on the matter & she's trying to tell him that & still refuses. Men are the same, dont value women. These men only think that women can't have their own lives outside of men. When she speaks to them they validate what's beneficial to men. Helpmate. Dude help yourself. I evaluate that most men that loves to cook turn it into a profitable business, but women is only to cook for her husband? Ladies leave these men alone- get your own bag cuz they getting theirs.

[@jeffreyjackson5472]

Poignant conversation... I'm 40 , Black , no kids and never married most likely not looking to get married.. times are precarious these days....

[@AChicRevue]

Men aren’t getting divorced because they cheat and that’s their escape.. if women are allowed to cheat and be happy, maybe they would stay.. it’s not fair he gets and escape an she doesn’t

[@isaacisgud]

Escape what? That will kick marriage away

[@angelhampton4365]

Trust me women can and do 😂

[@AChicRevue]

@@angelhampton4365 oh I already know, lol.. but they be falling in love with the side piece

[@isaacisgud]

@@AChicRevue Exactly

[@angelhampton4365]

@@AChicRevue imma get personal... I've been married for 15 years and once upon a time I cheated and was extremely close to ending my marriage because I thought I was in love and truth be told I did love both him and my husband but I wasn't in love with anyone most importantly myself... So I'm proof that it's possible and it's also possible to be forgiven... We can all fall short but the ending is how bad each individual wants the marriage

[@sinverrette9803]

Im so tired of people making excuses for these males to cheat.. cheaters period..

[@reggieeverett5027]

Wives will freeze you out of sex then you cheat. She's now a victim. Classic play

[@maishaaddai1052]

This is good but also bad for people who don’t have best intentions like our narcissist or emotional abuser , etc

[@Armour201]

If you consider starting your relationship with a consultation with a divorce attorney, marriage probably isn't for you. Couples don't start out with the hope of getting divorced. If you're ready to get married, Pre-marital counselling is what you need, not a divorce attorney.

[@s.e.t1579]

Grandma stuck it out because she had to. 😂

[@TheQueenIsHer]

And I want us to start having this realistic convo. Times are DIFFERENT now. Laws have changed! Women have wayyy more rights.

[@quathetruth8314]

She literally had no choice!

[@darrenhawkins9040]

What's up Opinion Seeker's,I bet she wasn't stealing from her husband.

[@oneandonly3139]

This is true .I once asked my grandma why she never traveled and she said that if she did she would have not returned

[@jasminjohnson2088]

Facts

[@1911gsb9365]

I got married to a woman in 2017, who was influenced by her family and friends to get divorced because she thought she could do better, almost 2 years later…I felt like I was doing everything right, and I was getting my MBA while going through the divorce. It was a devastating experience, and couldn’t believe the woman I actually married. It’s 2023, and just found through a mutual friend that she regretted getting divorced, and it actually became the biggest blessing for me. I took the high road and found a woman during the pandemic and we been together for the past 3 years.

[@Adore7_AUM]

Raising children and being a homemaker should not depend on which gender is doing it. Raising children should not be put down, even if a man is doing it. My Dad worked for decades and when my Mom went back to school my Dad retired and raised me. They were married 40 years. Some of the things stated during this episode are archaic. I think once they are older and actually married there views may change. Roles in marriage change and have to be flexible. It's give and take, sickness and in health. Both people in the marriage should be able to have income, clean house, raise children, run a house. Because someone could become ill, a business could fail, most children need a lot of attention from BOTH parents. ~And yes I've been married over 22 years.

[@angelhampton4365]

1:27 I absolutely agree on counseling BEFORE marriage however you absolutely should have conversations about divorce. Even though it shouldn't be on the table you should realistically ask the uncomfortable questions... To do that individually is smart however not absolute in mortality. Point is even in divorce if you can't agree on at the least a foundation that stems from morality, ethics and values it'll be way more than tacky... Court is merely an adult legal fight

[@MsDallasfinest]

Hell yes I’m leaving if I find out my man is gay, again this why we tell you brothers all the shxx black women go thru and yawl get upset when we call out the damage our men do to us black woman.

[@shayemoore]

Right. That's a no-brainer. If I find out he likes men, I'm gone.

[@Armour201]

Many people under-estimate the betrayal trauma from adultery and the dynamics involved. It's a form of domestic abuse - manipulation, coercion, lying, deception.

[@Rozeyred1]

There is no way that little bit of child support is paying for everything nice the woman has. I wish y’all would stop with that mess. Child support doesn’t stretch that far for the average.

[@Justice098]

The courts in Fulton county give fathers full custody left and right. I’m close to getting mine .

[@WHATsYOUR914]

To your question Ryan- Yes I’m leaving. He is risking my health 32:57

[@CorneliusDaKing]

Great show this is really good information

[@icesport2107]

Some men do leave their wives for cheating. Some men have cheated many times, but their wives never knew it. So if she got caught, he would be angry but he can't judge her because he has done the same thing but he didn't get caught. He will never tell her what he did.

[@robertgates8193]

1:33🚨 DISCLAIMER 🚨I'm not an attorney. I am not giving legal advice to anyone whatsoever. There is a PUBLIC side of the law and there is a PRIVATE side of the law. Two individuals can be married or have a contract on the private side of the law that the court will recognize. The two will just have it notarized (witness) and at that point they can put it on record on what the two have agreed on based on their private marital contract. The (Break up attorney) cannot publicly go on record and say this because PUBLIC AND PRIVATE don't mix in other words the same thing (Church & State ) don't mix. Also she is more than likely a member of the BAR association and she works as an attorney on the PUBLIC side of the law. She could also face disbarment if she did so. I would suggest that anyone reading my statement read a book called Remedies Public & Private Sixth Edition and a Blacks Law dictionary . There are several others out there but those are the ones that anybody can start with.😮

[@P.I.M.P.720]

When love has to be legalized,it's already compromised 😂💯😎

[@Think1stMedia]

Well said

[@monir3275]

I agree with the host. That is disgusting to be with a guy. A female deserves better. Very, No Extremely Unhealthy. Women shouldn't as well engage in that lifestyle. Never a friend of mine. Women want Real Men. That's Correct

[@AChicRevue]

She’s good.. I enjoyed her as a guest.. Great show!

[@saiddahbonner10]

You never lied, foundation and protection!