Divorce Lawyers, What Plot Twists Have You Seen?

[@LifesGuardian]

The woman traumatized her daughter and ruined her ex-husband's career because her daughter preferred him over her. All she got was a stern talking to from a JAG officer. That is criminal in and of itself. Yeah, he cheated and is an asshole, but she went far beyond slander. She should have gotten jail time, for sure.

[@Duke00x]

Accusing men of abuse and sexual assault/rape (of them and/or the kid/kids) is sady a somewhat common tactic in divorce/custody cases. So much so that it is pretty regularly suggested (either directly or less directly) by the lawyer.

[@maximaldinotrap]

If she flipped the lid over her daughter preferring him it makes you wonder if he started the affair because he was to afraid to bring up the word divorce. Yes, cheating is bad but sometimes the cheater has reasons beyond they wanted to cheat being their motive for cheating.

[@Elyseon]

@@maximaldinotrap True, but if you cheat on a psycho you're giving them ammunition and additional motives.

[@shannonrichardson5129]

I heard this story before. She didn't get off completely scott free. Her relationship with her daughter is pretty much out the window and so it her career.

[@franl155]

@@shannonrichardson5129 - If her daughter wanted to stay with him, doesn't sound like they had much of a relationship in the first place.

[@masterofThardus]

My grandparents have one of those weird friendly divorces, and it is one of the weirdest ever. They divorced while my dad was at the Naval Academy, and he didn't realize they were divorced until 3 years later. Even then, he only figured it out because he was told. My grandparents separated for a few years (my grandpa moved back to Germany during that time), but afterwards moved back into the same house together. Never got remarried to each other or anyone else, slept in separate beds, sometimes separated from one another for months, but lived in the same house and treated one another with the upmost respect. It gets even weirder-but-wholesome as you get closer to the present. My grandpa went legally blind about a decade ago (Agent Orange exposure or something when he was in the army, I think), and ever since then my grandma (a retired caretaker for old people with dementia and the like) has been taking care of him. She's been doing a very good job of it, too. My dad has long theorized that his parents have always been in love, they just also drive each other crazy due to their various emotional and mental issues (nothing severe, but they do have some uh...eccentricities). The divorce was just a way for them to separate financially, and a way for them to separate physically without guilt when during times when they needed breaks from one another. Other than short stints of separation, they've always lived together and interact socially as if they're still married for the most part.

[@nicholasbrassard3512]

Feels like me and my baby mama. Though we still need to work on interacting well together xD

[@nonnielove2238]

Aw man! That makes me super happy to hear! cx I wish when my parents divorced it was something like that! cx

[@snowwolfe]

My grandpa and grandma divorced after about 5 years together.. his best friend from high school married her when my grandpa remarried, and they were together for 40 years. My grandpa still drove to Dallas twice a year to stay at their house and go to dinners and see my aunt and we were all a really close during events and things like that up until my grandma passed away last September… I didn’t realize how “weird” it was until I was around 20 or so.. lol

[@Lulymarte1609]

That’s how you see love ? Sleeping on different beds? Do you be rlly thing they were happy,trust me, At least one of them was miserable…

[@kaitlyn3168]

Awww...your grandparents sound like wonderful people. They love and respect each other enough to still take care of each other even if they're not legally married. That's wonderful.

[@toricollins6516]

The woman that made false rape allegations should be arrested & jailed. Disgusting. Terrible.

[@franl155]

I think any woman deliberately making false rape or child abuse accusations should be given the same sentence as the man would have got had the accusations been true. "This is what you wanted him to get, now you get it instead."

[@redtankgirl5]

No kidding huh. That was so out of control and utterly unbelievable that they didn’t do just that. I’m with you on this.

[@tinybionic8940]

@@franl155 you should like put that in an official statement. Maybe it could carry some yraction

[@franl155]

@@tinybionic8940 maybe I'll start a petition to get it made into law!

[@juliagoodwin9510]

F$%^ that spiteful $^#.

[@hothotheat3000]

Pettiest one I’ve heard is a woman demanding her soon to be ex-husband’s dog. It was his dog before the marriage and it came out she wanted to get the dog so she could return it to a shelter just to hurt him. Her own lawyer told her to cut that shit. She didn’t get the dog. Pupper is still alive, well, and loves his daddy.

[@shadowpat810]

If there's a Satan, even he would get disgusted by the pettiness

[@AlienCowThatMoos]

All the divorce stories that involve someone putting their spouse's pet down the moment they have them in hand are pure evil. I don't understand how it's even a thing that you can have a pet killed at the vet for no reason.

[@lollybirdy]

@@AlienCowThatMoos I don't think you can.

[@darkknight5541]

Thank god.

[@cindykq8086]

My husband's cousin has been married several times. He finally said, "Why do I keep getting married? Why don't I just find a woman I hate and buy her a house, every 5 years?"

[@debshaw680]

That was a line on an early episode Criminal Minds. Pretty sure either you or your cousin got it there. I just saw that episode. 😆

[@pugsabi]

I'm willing to hate someone for a free house 😂

[@nemo227]

@@debshaw680 The "Criminal Minds" show could be pretty damn scary at times.

[@suzys8558]

uuuhhhh, not trying to be weird but... where can I appliy?

[@carolroberts4614]

I hate my ex, but he got the house( bought me out cheaply)

[@raphaeldagamer]

The one about Christmas where they're both Jewish blows me away every time. It just solidifies to me that in divorce it's not about what you do get, it's about what your ex doesn't.

[@geraldgrenier8132]

Jewish doesn't rule out participating in the secular Christmas rituals

[@eightw5783]

and then it turned out they were both Jewish, already.

[@captainmarvelous7678]

Not really, a lot of people still get the time off work even if they don't celebrate the holiday. So you are fighting for the chance to have a nice day and dinner with (likely)family and your child on that date. I've never celebrated Christmas but I still spend time with my family on those days because *they* do

[@raphaeldagamer]

@@captainmarvelous7678 good point. I hadn't thought of it that way.

[@jawusha]

Anyone who accuses someone of molesting their children for no reason is an evil person who deserves no rights.

[@masterofThardus]

I am firmly of the opinion that falsely accusing someone of something is on the same moral level as actually doing the thing you are accusing them of.

[@aidansmith8617]

Tell that to my stepmom

[@Pman8362]

Yea, not only is it an awful thing but it makes it harder on those who have actually had experienced such things to come forward, as people will be more hesitant to believe them after dealing with the situation. The fact that she could do it repeatedly without any punishment is so awful.

[@Jose04537]

Is so common, along with out of nowhere domestic abuse accusations, to win the divorce, it's called the nuclear option.

[@river6032]

100%. It hurts the person being accused but it also hurts the child of the accused/accuser in cases like this one (especially when nobody will listen to the kid) And it hurts those who it has actually happened to. As a survivor I HATE false accusers. If you knowingly make a false accusation like that and it affects that person's career, you should be punished for it. She should have went to jail.

[@SasukeUchiha-tc9xx]

My friend has divorced parents, but it’s one of the healthiest I’ve ever seen. The two parents are basically best of friends and are super nice, and they share custody weekly with no issues. The best thing? The mother is partnered with someone else, and the father and him became very good friends. So, at birthday parties, both dads attend along with the entire family from all three sides, as well as my friend’s other friends. Those days are awesome. Basically, the divorce made the family bigger and more tight-knit.

[@andrewshepherd5249]

Me and my ex-wife do the samething. It's just being an adult. But I don't do it for her but for our kids.

[@Phoebe5448]

Aww thats so cute!! We need to normalise amicable divorces.

[@leiderhosen7110]

Seems clear they love eachother still, a fully committed marriage just strained them too much so they went back to being just friends.

[@LevonBlueoak]

that is surprisingly wholesome

[@Moon_Thief_420]

Ok, that's just really lovely. 😊☺️

[@Phoenix8492]

“I’ll give you 100% of the business. It will be completely worthless without me but too can have the whole thing: take it or leave it.” What a power move.

[@janelleg597]

But two

[@bendystrawz2832]

@@janelleg597 but *you

[@sugarplum3565]

21:56 I turned eight-turned-eight-turned-eight-turned-eight-turned-eight...

[@soulbound2]

Hahahahahahahah

[@kelf114]

😁😁😁

[@itachisenjux2675]

I was so confused i thought my shit was broken

[@uuouuo5480]

@@itachisenjux2675 Yes. I scrolled down the comments wondering why it wasn't mentioned...until I saw this comment. The *last* video I watched where it did something like that, no one commented on it...making me wonder if it was just *my* video doing that.

[@seluland]

Does the channel owner even watch their own vids to check for these things? Seems like it happens every other video

[@Shadoboy]

The guy with the parents with the healthy divorce is right: it's considered completely strange by the lawyers and judges. Happened with my mom and dad too: from the begining it was decided that my mom would have custody and they never argued otherwise. My mom turned down an offer for a high quantity of child support because she has her own job and she doesn't want to take advantage of my dad, so she negotiated to get a lesser ammount. In the moment when it came to split the things, there was some discussion over making sure the other party had enough. In particular, my dad wanted us to keep all the TVs, while my mom said he should take one, why would we want so many? The lawyers and judge were like: "Are you sure you two are getting divorced? Years later, they are still on very friendly terms, they send each other jokes on Whatsapp, dad got married again and had two more kids. Me and my sister get along with them really well and my mom says she considers them some sort of nephews.

[@Norinia]

-“He’s going to put the dog down if he gets it” -“It’s *Man* ‘s best friend, not woman’s best friend!!” -“I’M GOING HOME RIGHT NOW AND I’M GONNA KILL THE LITTLE F*CKER SO YOU CAN’T HAVE IT!!” 25:00 lol woowww. Wonder how that turned out.

[@deettekearns9092]

Man, these stories. Except for the one guy who wrote about the respect his parents have for one another, these others are brutal. How could someone screw over their spouse so heartlessly? Leaving them tens of thousands of dollars in debt they never accrued and abandoning their children. Shameful.

[@debshaw680]

Because they’re assholes. For 6 years my ex and I were like that. Then he remarried and all hell broke loose. Only my son will talk to him and only because he has conservatorship because my ex is a drug addict and alcoholic now and nearly died.

[@nemo227]

It's scary how screwed up some people can be. You might see them walking down the street and think they're normal people but . . . we also can't recognize serial killers. These types are soul killers.

[@Jose04537]

Or accuse your husband of r*ping his daughter and traumatize her, because you're just salty your daughter prefer your husband. Is so common, along with out of nowhere domestic abuse accusations, to win the divorce, it's called the nuclear option.

[@cecelastname6362]

@@Jose04537 yep it's fucked up and it also makes real situations less credible. Sad all the way around.

[@LevonBlueoak]

people are bitches. nuff' said

[@siggie8727]

The Hitman comment ..The reason you never hear about them is they are that good !!!

[@Duke00x]

That is what I said. "You don't hear about them because they do their job and don't get caught".

[@randomguy129-c3g]

Gosh, how do you know that?

[@TheZombifiedFairy]

Pretty sure I'm on several watch list for saying "the hitman business isn't taking a hit because people who really want them aren't dumb enough to put Craigslist ads out for them. If you want someone to disappear, you need to be smart about it."

[@ZTheLastViking]

I'd assume a lot of it is put off as gangs killing innocent bystanders. Knowing gang members is probably the easiest way to get a hit ordered

[@Jose04537]

The worst is accusing your husband of r*ping his daughter and traumatize her, because you're just salty your daughter prefer your husband. Is so common, along with out of nowhere domestic abuse accusations, to win the divorce, it's called the nuclear option.

[@oz_jones]

It's always so silly to see divorced parents trying to poison the well against the other parent. Usually when the kid(s) grow up, they will realize the truth and just resent the poisoner. Oh well.

[@TimeSurfer206]

12:00 "In all honesty, I've never heard of a hitman, hired in the last thirty years, that **wasn't** an undercover cop, or an informant, or a con that turned the client in." You wouldn't hear about the real ones, would you? Kind of like seeing a Ninja...

[@DavidFMayerPhD]

That is because the REAL hitmen don't file criminal charges against their clients. They DO, however, frequently murder the clients too so the clients cannot turn state's evidence. It is insane to trust a person willing to murder a stranger for money.

[@TimeSurfer206]

@@DavidFMayerPhD And now you know why most successful Crime Syndicates have been run as "Families."

[@TimmyTantrum]

I was opening up a few new bank accounts for a couple, and as general housekeeping I ask if their address is still the same. The woman tells me no, her new address is this. So as I'm starting to change their address, they pipe up, "we're divorcing and she's moving out." Oh... okay... no problem. Turns out we were opening her up new accounts, taking her off the joint accounts, and splitting their money 50/50. No attorneys or mediators present, just two ex-spouses casually discussing their finances. Even realized he was an authorized user on her credit card, so took him off of that and he applied for his own (approved). The whole time, they're making small talk and even laughing. The whole thing was the most amicable, pragmatic financial decision-making I've ever witnessed, and I'm including happily married people in that.

[@jojol.2630]

If I ever get married, I’m making a prenup clause that if we have a pet and one of us puts down the pet without consent of the other party, the other party automatically get everything

[@sebastianhopkins7322]

The Air Force story - The Judge should have done away with her instead of threatening to do so if she continued! These types of people disgust me! You are a pathetic excuse for a human being if you try to “take down” your ex-spouse in this way just because you are butt hurt!

[@notmuch_23]

So what I've learned here is never even _start_ a romantic relationship with somebody else.

[@Phoebe5448]

Thank christ I'm and asexual/aromantic.

[@spacetofu5306]

@@Phoebe5448 ay same! I might die alone, but I'll die knowing peace.

[@Phoebe5448]

@@spacetofu5306 Indeed. Be yourself. Screw conformity!!

[@BraveAbandon]

sure you can, just protect your assets by never get married and never move in with each other lol. its quite the sad life though, of never trusting another human being. theres more to life than accumulating 'stuff'. you cant take it with you when you pass over

[@LordSkella]

@@BraveAbandon that’s what wills are for, give it to a friend of you haven’t outlived them

[@Solar_Axis]

My mom and dad got divorced when I was maybe seven or something because my dad cheated on her with my step mom. (They're both actually really nice people, unlike most of the crazy lunatics in these stories.) My mom was devastated, but they coparent surprisingly well because, in their minds, they have to for me and my sister. When I was in about the fourth grade maybe, I got a terrible, almost *fatal* infection in my tibia. (it was speeding throughout the rest of my body slowly.) The doctors called my parents in because they weren't entirely sure if I would make it or not, and apparently it's standard procedure to have guards escort divorced parents to and from their children's rooms. My mom said, and I QUOTE "Some nurse said 'We have an awful time keeping people from fighting!' *NO* I'M NOT GONNA FIGHT WITH MY EX HUSBAND IN FRONT OF MY BABY! Lunatics."

[@oz_jones]

Couple of things. Glad you survived, that infection sounds crazy. And good on your parents for coparenting well, despite their issues with each other. Thanks for sharing.

[@Solar_Axis]

@@oz_jones thx man!

[@valenciageode25]

This doesn’t have much to do with the video, but I imagine two divorce lawyers getting a divorce would try to be as civil as possible in front of their divorce lawyer for the lawyers sake, since they know how draining the job can be.

[@absolutelyyousless7605]

In the one where the ex-wife was sleeping with the guys divorce attorney... wasn’t he paranoid enough? I mean, normally that’s suspect to stalk your ex, but when she’s sleeping with someone who’s trying your case, then it makes it worth it?

[@amusing4me257]

I mean you have a point

[@phlushphish793]

So he breaks & enters? Heard so many stories of guys who stalk/kill their exes. Just. Let. It. Go.

[@captainmarvelous7678]

@@phlushphish793 Didn't say he wasn't wrong for committing a crime. But the fact is his paranoia was justified. He had to do something wrong to get that confirmation but it does mean his level of paranoia was appropriate. He just shouldn't have acted on it.

[@oz_jones]

@@phlushphish793 Luckily women don't stalk their exes. At all.

[@phlushphish793]

@@oz_jones Ha-ha! Got me!

[@k9jocks]

So what I'm hearing is get a prenup for the dogs.

[@thema.sosoudid2229]

Get a prenub for everything

[@oz_jones]

Prepup?

[@timereap3r917]

Alright Who bumped the record? 21:54

[@boredcore3500]

Recently started working as an assistant at a law office the funniest thing for me was a divorce where the wife refused release not just our client’s passport, diploma, and other personal items but his family bible. I would have loved to have been able to hear her reasoning for that.

[@sarahmitten3197]

I'm never getting married... this sealed the deal

[@TipTheScales27]

I’m never having a joint bank account they can drain is what I got out of it lol

[@sarahmitten3197]

@@TipTheScales27 joint anything!. damn people are selfish and sly

[@andrewshepherd5249]

80% of divorces are filed by women.

[@isaacpowrie465]

@@andrewshepherd5249 never knew that

[@andrewshepherd5249]

@@isaacpowrie465 yep

[@hawkfeather537]

6:51 isn’t it illegal to intentionally falsely accuse someone of that? Or does it only apply if you’re accusing them of doing it to you?

[@nataliegenung1787]

I believe it is illegal as it’s mostly an accusation to ruin the name, which is slander, and also, it was still their own daughter. Which is doubly bad.

[@lynchkid003]

It is illegal to file a false police report.

[@ettinakitten5047]

16:18 The reason this is so unusual is because people who are good at cooperating with each other and compromising are much less likely to need to get a divorce.

[@johnquiett1085]

My ex-wife insisted I made more money than I claimed, despite pulling pay stubs and bank account statements for three years. Her lawyer kept using her made up numbers for my income despite our proof otherwise. The arbiter finally had to scream at her and her lawyer that they were wrong and to get with the program. She also tried to take all the patio furniture my parents had bought us. Her dad had built some nice bedroom stuff that I agreed she should take, but she threw a fit when I said I was keeping the patio stuff. The apartment she moved to doesn't even have a patio/balcony. Oh and I also gave her the dining room set because a relative had one to give me. She didn't need it. Arbiter gave me the patio furniture because she agreed my parents gifted it to us.

[@odysseus2656]

The story of the people wasting all their assets fighting in court reminds me of an old joke where a man is arrested and his attorney says: "Don't worry you will not go to jail with a million dollars." And he did not, he went to jail broke, his lawyer had the million dollars.

[@Knitboy1997]

Knew a couple that was divorcing, because they have found out they have both cheated. Later it turned out they were both having an affair with the same guy...

[@willfe]

That last anecdote either didn't happen, or it did but it wasn't the father's fault. You don't get to choose when or where the other party gets served when you file a lawsuit. The process server does. They're regulated, too -- you don't just get to hang up a shingle and call yourself a process server without being licensed for it and registered with the court(s) for which you're doing process service work. Now granted, process servers *do* sometimes have to be pretty devious and sneaky to serve somebody papers if they're deliberately trying to avoid service, but I cannot *possibly* imagine any licensed process server willingly *breaking isolation* to hand-deliver a court summons to a parent at their child's bedside in a hospital, especially when he could have just asked to speak with her privately for a moment *outside* isolation. I also find it implausible that hospital staff would ever permit a process server to do such a thing. Allowing a stranger (badge or not) with no relation to (or business with) the patient to break that patient's medically-necessary isolation just to hand-deliver court papers to a visitor? Ridiculous. If it really did go down that way, the wife might as well have just told the husband "lol you're fine, let's just rush this divorce through quickly and split down the middle whatever we get from these idiots" to get it over with because that process server and hospital just wrote that couple a seven-figure check for that level of screwup. If the wife really did use that environment deliberately to avoid service, the process server can just note it and report back to the serving party, and they can petition the court for alternative service (where sticking it on their front door, mailing it by certified mail, or leaving it with a family member is "good enough" since you've shown the court that you've tried doing it the right way first). There's absolutely no reason for a process server to ever try such an outrageously unethical stunt. They don't get paid enough and the courts don't require that level of persistence (or anything close to it).

[@randomhobbyist99]

15:31 yea... that’s how my divorce is like with my ex wife. Not everyone desires the text book divorce drama. 🥴

[@jmjedi923]

I imagined the independent children's lawyer as a child lawyer. Like a 10 year old in a suit and holding a briefcase.

[@oz_jones]

Lawyer Baby!

[@ellabergin7109]

I want to know who won the peanut butter

[@justabasicgemini1302]

I've read many good books, heard amazing stories, and been invested in so many fandom's. And yet I have never been as invested in a story as who got that peanut butter.

[@josepherhardt164]

Plot twist: The peanut butter hid the key to a secret safe-deposit box. Filled with bullion.

[@FromAgonyToLight]

My ex husband didn't serve me properly, falsified information on a government document in a case he was involved in (perjury). When I said we could just split everything 50/50 or I would get him jail time for said perjury he stole a lot of stuff from me (even underwear??) And disappeared!

[@carissamessina1908]

I’ve been divorced for 14 years. My ex and I raised our son together. We still take everyday. Our son is 19 and autistic. I’m even friends with my ex’s girlfriend. He just called me to get my stepdads new work number, his gf needs new tires. It’s absolutely possible to be divorced and not be absolute assholes and use the kids as weapons.

[@torvurd]

5:48 The whole family is together grieving the lose of their trusty companion. The kids: "At least we still have each other." The parents: "Yeeaaah, about that."

[@debshaw680]

My ex kept threatening to move across the country and not pay child support. We had to get him to agree he wouldn’t leave the area but that tied me there. He wouldn’t agree to let me move 2 hours away to take my grandmother’s fully paid off house so I’d only have to pay taxes. Then he started using drugs (in his 40s) with his wife. They forged my signature and took my name off the house, took out a second mortgage and took his name off the mortgage. I’d been paying the mortgage I knew about all along but then he sold the house out from under us right after the court refused my petition to move to my grandmother’s house. So our 3 kids and I had nowhere to live and had crushing debt from 2 mortgages on a house he sold and I got nothing from. Courts did not help me until one of my kids was aged out of child support. But all they did then was raise my child support to the legal amount due because he failed to appear in court 5 times in a row.

[@Pman8362]

Damn that is a shitty situation. Seems like stuff in the realm of child support and such always shows the courts as really inept, as you have situations like yours as well as those where the courts just rule in favor of the mother having custody basically by default. That being said these kinds of posts have a self selecting group of posters so it’s hard to make a large sweeping judgement from it alone.

[@sakamotothecat17]

Did you sue him for fraud?

[@debshaw680]

@@sakamotothecat17 how would I prove I hadn’t signed the papers on my own and was trying to get the house back? Nope, I was screwed.

[@jeffdiamond486]

My ex-wife kept the mediation going for 12 hours. The mediator would come to me and my attorney, we'd discuss for about 10 minutes, then send it to the others. We'd then wait between 40 minutes and an hour and a half. I wonder if she did that because she knew I was barely squeaking by financially, and she has a full-time job with great benefits.

[@raphaeldagamer]

Turned eigh-turned eigh-turned eigh-turned eigh.

[@edstevens6839]

My mom was divorcing an ex. I found out later that she was accusing him of cheating, yet she arrived with her 2 "sugar babies". Despite that, she was given full custody of me and my 2 brothers. I do NOT communicate with any of them!

[@9manny99]

21:56 broken a bit

[@FanFicnic]

My dad has a dark sense of humor. In his business he hires a lot of teamsters and construction workers. Apparently there’s a lot of turnover because it takes a certain amount of time for courts in other states to recognize income and start garnishing it for unpaid alimony. I think it’s like the 1st of the month every 3 months or something. Every time this day would roll around a bunch of contract workers would just dip. Move on to another job. My dad refers to this as “Little Bastard Day”

[@justins8634]

The divorced parents of a good friend of mine treat each other like old friends and weren’t afraid to compromise, and he’s one of the most stable people I know. I never thought about how he would have turned out if his parents weren’t so selfless. They really are good people.

[@SteveJonesGamingGWO]

11:05 Was okay with this guy following his wife to confirm infidelity but second you open anything that isn't yours, that's your ass

[@AbsolXGuardian]

26:07 Honestly if I was the judge in that case, I'd say that the native American artifacts have to be repatriated regardless of how ethically they were procured or how long and tangled their provence was just to remove part of the estate from contention.

[@AzraelThanatos]

That would create a lot of other issues with it, someone who legally acquired them can't just be stripped of their property rights there.

[@thegimpygamer]

As a native America I find your idea ludicrous. Repatriated is just your word for theft.

[@bkmaxfield5113]

When I was growing up a local divorce lawyer who always represented the wife had a name very similar to my father's (i.e. Robert A. Sampson vs. Roberta Sampson) we used to get angry drunk calls from soon to be ex-husbands at all hours making threats. Wouldn't believe they had the wrong number and we didn't know her. Fun times.

[@Princess_Maya_19]

The situation where the mother was hurt by her daughter choosing to be with the father during the divorce and preceded to lie repeatedly about her soon to be ex-husband molesting and raping her daughter should be absolutely ashamed of herself and given some sort of punishment for making false allegations.

[@user-ml3hl6vr4t]

Fellows that think a girl should have a female circumcision should first be totally castrated, twig and berries, first. Female circumcision is such a mutilating procedure-and how it is performed is past ghastly... it should be banned and those that believe in it should be up for capital punishment. It is horrible horrid process.... normal age is 4-5 so I worry for that poor girl, but it’s been done to grown adults.

[@StarWarsomania]

It's not circumcision. It's frickin' mutilation.

[@user-ml3hl6vr4t]

@@StarWarsomania I think I said that. It's a gross mutilation-not anything that helps the girl or woman. And males that think it should be done should undergo similar level of mutilation done under the same circumstances... a goodly number die from the infections... It's said about 100 million believe in and perform this as a religious belief right. Wrong.

[@MotorcycleCheetah]

18:00 While I agree the court has a bad track record of that, this is not one of those cases. This man is clearly crazy and should have no custody.

[@SudsyMedusa53]

That second to last one was really bad. I hope he's doing okay.

[@juliagoodwin9510]

Jesus, the things people will do to spite each other... so glad I'm single.

[@drpureinsanity]

21:55 TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A TURNED A.

[@TurtleChad1]

A turtle approves of these plot twists

[@pinkpajamapants]

Glad to know this video is turtle-approved

[@davestechstuff8222]

- T U R T L E - A P P R O V E D - V I D E O -

[@xx_isabel_the_wolf_xx3869]

vaush rad

[@lordravenblade]

The one where the bro in law met the thespian (intentional), funded the bar, etc needs the bro to go get a CAT scan or something. More than midlife-crisis none of it makes any sense at all and I’ve seen a lot of situations like that where it’s actually a brain tumor massively screwing things up.

[@Kenny-yu6gc]

7:52 iirc from the other Reddit type ask lawyers questions they say that whenever the father gets accused of molesting his daughter they check by seeing if the daughter still has her hymen intact and usually the mother just throws it out there thinking she'll be believed unconditionally to get custody until she realizes that they now need to check her daughter's hymen and she'll instantly regret saying it because it's degrading for the daughter, if the hymens intact it'll show she's a liar and they're not going to stop the check even if she recanted the statement.

[@krishanubanerjee6955]

14:19 - There HAS to be something more to this than meets the eye! Too bad we never got any of the *sordid details*

[@kroottastic]

Only a kind of related story, more an inheritance story than divorce, because my parents never officialy married, since my father was Catholic and still married but seperated from his wife. I was my fathers only child. My mom and him seperated about two years after I was born. They had shared custody. Things were fantastic between them, no disputes, only respect. My 'step mother' started living with my dad again when I was 16, because he had terminal cancer. We had a good relationship even before that though, like having a second mom. He passed when I was 18, and left the money to me, and the house to her, under the agreement that when she eventually passed away it would then go to me. She instead willed it to her sister out of secreted spite before she passed when I was 19.

[@EEsmalls]

I may pretty much hate my ex, but I would never use our daughter as a pawn. He was a terrible SO, but he's a great dad, and it's important that she knows daddy loves her and will always be there when she needs. I cannot even fathom what some women do just to try to hurt the soon to be ex.

[@path4522]

21:56 He just got tazed

[@Crazylom]

21:56 That spooked me

[@bryanguerra3683]

20:53 that “was the father...” was too great to be unrecognized

[@Self-replicating_whatnot]

16:10 Lol i imagine it being something like: "I don't want to have sex with or live under the same roof as this person, but other than that i think they are perfectly upstanding citizen and can share custody of our kids no problem"

[@MrsShocoTaco]

When I was 10 my mom remarried. While they were married they had some minor repairs done to the house including a new roof, siding, and appliances. When they divorced 5 years later, he tried to sue for the roof, siding, and appliances. Not the monetary equivalent but the actual items. The judge just shook his head, awarded mom everything because it was anyway, and dismissed all stepdad's claims, and threatened to throw him in jail for wasting the court's time if he tried to appeal the decision.

[@xfuriousapex]

My ex stayed with me for years because we had a sick dog she couldn't take care of by herself. One week after the dog finally died she told me she wanted a divorce.

[@flyingturret208thecannon5]

"my lawyer is doing a shit job of protecting me. Something's up. Plus, my wife is pretty happy even though we're divorcing." *one night later* "YOU LAWYERFUCKER!"

[@camilac.l.1323]

The man that wanted to fly the child to Africa to get mutilated... Virgin Mary on a skateboard, I hope the poor girl gets to grow safe and in one piece.

[@beastmaster0934]

At least with boys (like myself) Being circumcised has SOME benefit (no smegma, easier to clean, etc) But you shouldn’t have your baby boy circumcised if you don’t want to. Girls shouldn’t be circumcised. EVER

[@mechengr1731]

@@beastmaster0934 yeah, I didnt even know you could circumcise a girl. I thought the dude was just delusional about her being a boy. Nope, clit removal Wouldn't that make sex painful as well as unenjoyable?

[@oz_jones]

@@beastmaster0934 Imagine defending genital mutilation.

[@KatLuff]

Got to "turned eight turned eight turned eight," scrolled to the comments, wasn't disappointed.

[@actuallynotsteve]

THEY TURNED THEY TURNED THEY TURNED THEY TURNED THEY TURNED THEY TURNED

[@Duke00x]

The court system is bias against men. But that guy should not have custody of his kids and the court actually did the right thing.

[@EEsmalls]

Absolutely she should be charged, slander is illegal, and also she was doing it with malicious intent

[@mrsister032]

18:32 There's no way that sale happened, way too many laws would prevent that...it would be easily found during the discovery phase of the divorce.

[@lostsoldier2728]

Robber:*breaks into bank* GIVE ME ALL THE CORN CHIPS! Bank Teller:*visibly confused* Robber:YOU HEAR ME B!TCH!

[@snafuthegreat]

The twist came in my friend's divorce some 15 years ago. He worked part-time for a private investigator, testing out surveillance equipment, when he was served with divorce papers and a restraining order. At the same time, his ex-brother-in-law was a person of interest in a murder investigation. Turned out that my friend had video evidence that cleared the BIL's name, and used that video to strongarm his ex into giving him everything in the divorce, or her brother faces life in prison. Once the divorce papers were in his hand, he sent his ex the tape, and the ex-BIL was cleared.

[@monus782]

The Nigerian missionary was the one that surprised me the most

[@crystalgoddess4085]

The one saying that the lesbian stripper being pregnant made them "not a good lesbian", mustn't realise that some lesbian couples will rely on things like IVF to have children, which guess what? *Results in pregnancy.* Unless you know someone's exact situation, those sort of comments should *not* be made.

[@roms7168]

especially if you're not a lesbian or even a woman

[@problemvticc1952]

am I the only one getting that audio glitch at around 21:58?

[@Teiboku]

No

[@Benkenobi8118]

lol. "cut me a cheque for half my business". SAVAGE.

[@andrewsalm2518]

Love it when the judge is the hero in half of these things

[@DrWoodyII]

After law school, I shared communal office space with a family law attorney (F35) who was one of the nicest people I've ever met. She said that in her first divorce case in court when the couple told the judge that they didn't love each other anymore, she broke down and cried like a baby. My question, "Why on earth are you in family law?"

[@Kris-wo4pj]

always got a job?

[@janicewilcox8590]

Wanna stop your parents from fighting over your pet rock? Claim it. It's yours right? Stop the madness ffs

[@nicoolive7613]

21:59 for a moment I though my browser got frozen while I was working on my table.

[@BushidoBrownSama]

wow that uncle is brilliant

[@C.CurrySims]

17:04 Just because the family court is sexiest against men, DOES NOT make that the wrong ruling

[@neco5740]

"Welcome back to we hate humanity, today we have for you :" "Parenting + Marriage"

[@PanduPoluan]

That story about the amicable divorce, where both parents still cooperate and respect and even support each other... That reminds me of Eddie Van Halen and his first wife. They too hard an amicable divorce, and even came to their ex-spouse's (re)marriage as invited guests, and wished each other well. Strange. Probably they really should've taken the "Open Marriage" route instead?

[@amyrachelle350]

The thumbnail gave me scary flashbacks of that SpongeBob episode 🤣

[@lnsflare1]

Note to self: if I ever become a lawyer, put a gigantic, easily visible clause in my contact that each time my client deliberately takes any non-prescription mind-altering substances within such a timeframe they are still impaired by the time of any scheduled interaction with myself or the court as a whole, their bill is doubled.

[@WayWardWonderer]

These stories make me so grateful to be single!

[@yaff1851]

11:52 It’s a lot less surprising if you think about it: Actual Hitmen aren’t exactly listed in the yellow pages. What are the odds a suburban housewive willing to become a rich widow finds someone who wouldn’t turn her in? Even an actual hitman might call the police rather than trusting her to shut her mouth, cover her track and last but not least not being a undercover cop herself.

[@oz_jones]

An actual hitman would _actually_ just kill her, though.

[@bigpeacepipe9741]

Thing about dogs and children is if it goes to court you "know" the court will act in the childs interests but treat the dog like property

[@14thivy89]

That pet rock one. 🥺🖤🖤🖤

[@craigmcdonald3846]

27:51 This is why aliens don't land and say hello.

[@tonychan8558]

23:31 I never thought the computer voice could show any emotion, but the way they said 'frick yeah chicken milk' gave me the image of the computer voice doing a victory punch in the air !!!!!

[@NinjaButters]

The video-editing uncle is my hero

[@rafaeldias4490]

27:54 I love that mom

[@blakedabner9338]

"I hate it when i find out im jewish" Bro! When i say i fell on the floor i absolutely mean that literally!!!!! I was Not ready for this voice to read that sentence!!🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@danielschein6845]

2:28. In my naivete, when interviewing divorce lawyers I asked if they ever had a repeat client. I learned nothing about their legal skills from this but I got some very disturbing insights into human nature. Not only did they all have repeat clients but the exes of those clients all had the same issues... except for one attorney who told me he represented the same guy 5 times. All his exes were completely different messed up stories. (That guy had more than 5 ex-wives but he only used this attorney 5 times.)