Divorced, Laid Off, And Starting From Zero At 30

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Chelsea is joined by marketing professional and financial podcaster Alex Offor to talk about the challenges life throws at us, and the joys of reclaiming your freedom and starting over when you least expect it.
Listen to Alex's podcast, Financial Flex with Lex, here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
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[@hathaway-sk2pj]

Great video, The first $100,000 invested was amazing. But when you hit $300,000 it’s like smashing the glass ceiling! I cried.

[@soriakatrice]

I completely agree with you! My first 100k took a long time and wasn't that special to be honest with you. Once I hit 300K that is the game changer in my opinion. At this point my money is basically making me a pretty good yearly salary. When I go to sleep at night I know my money is making decent money with the help of my FA.

[@rojas-ei6to]

Nice. People often underestimate financial advisors' importance. Over 50 years of data reveal that those who work with advisors typically earn more than those who go it alone. I've been fortunate to work with one for 13 years, resulting in a $1 million portfolio, largely from early investments in AI and other growth stocks.

[@hathaway-sk2pj]

I've been considering but haven't been proactive. Can you recommend your advisor? Could really use some assistance.

[@soriakatrice]

Angela Lynn Schilling is the licensed advisor I use. Just research the name. You’d find necessary details to work with to set up an appointment.

[@hathaway-sk2pj]

I looked up her name online and found her page. I emailed and made an appointment to talk with her. Thanks for the tip.

[@1hf325bsa]

Hey Chelsea, I just wanted to say that no matter how salty the comments are sometimes, you listen to your audience. You are really stepping up the diverse perspectives. It could never be perfect and please everyone, but you do listen and try your best. Thanks.

[@pilarcastellano8619]

I startted from zero on my fourties. I was living with a toxic mother, and Ihad no job. Now I have a permanent job and soon I´ll be able to afford a car. You can start over at any age.

[@scalylayde8751]

This gives me hope. I'm 32 and forget about "starting over" - I feel like I'm still trying to start the first time. I see all these people younger than me who somehow got jobs that pay 3x what I make in their early 20s, and I just get so demoralized.

[@Ana-gq7ce]

Congratulations! 😍

[@AsEiVaMpZ]

I'm about to turn 32 as well. And this comment has really saved me today. Thank you. I can do it.

[@sayuristillwater7471]

You are an inspiration ✨️

[@mooters87]

That’s so admirable! I’m 36, finally decided that I will go into the healthcare field. I probably won’t start until I’m 38 but no one knows the setbacks I’ve gone through but ME. I’m hopeful for the future and with God’s guidance anything can and will be achieved!

[@Linda.xing-tj2fh]

Great content, quite touching though Starting from zero at 30 after divorce and being laid off can be daunting. It's crucial to consider how to rebuild wealth and invest wisely given these circumstances.

[@mariadrukker2557]

Indeed, splitting wealth during a divorce can leave one in a challenging financial position. I'm curious about strategies for rebuilding wealth and starting investing from scratch at any age, especially in retirement

[@Bigwilli123]

I am 53 and retired at 50. 1 thing I did was to get out of the 401K and IRA programs. Bought rental real-estate and I am now a Limited Partner in about 1500+ units from collabrative efforts in the fund my estate planner has me invested in. I do not work.

[@Bigwilli123]

An observation on 401K's is when it gets over 300K it starts to accelerate. When you get over 500K it can really accelerate as the stock market grows.

[@Andres_853]

Wow, you are really insightful. How did you come up with this and you would certainly have other better strategies

[@roseylumber]

you were certainly helped by a professonal planner, who please??

[@meetmeinmontaukkk]

I got chills when Alex talked about her identity crisis when confronting the loss of her job, marriage, and home. It made me think about how much we place value on and rely on these areas to define who we are, and what that looks like in my own life. It makes me question how I view myself outside of these life “achievements.”

[@doggydude4123]

You can substitute but not replace: a job with hobbies, marriage with friends/family/significant other, home with another home (it's what you make it). Sometimes, when we lose so much, it can reveal what we really are: Survivors.

[@missmillion5407]

⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠@@doggydude4123I disagree, it can be a replacement..a hobby can become a job or another source of income if something happens to your 9-5 job. Friends, family can be just as fulfilling if not more then marriage a lot of people should not be getting married it does not work well for everyone..

[@AmandaabnamA]

Having parents to fall back on is huge. Having lost my mother and home at the same time at 25, you apprecIate the safety net all the more

[@scalylayde8751]

Having listened to a lot of these stories of people pulling off financial marvels, what always stands out to me is that they had luck as well as gumption. Not to discount her hard work, but, Alex probably wouldn't have been able to pay her student loans in such a short time if she didn't have an opportunity where she had two incomes, no rent (or very low rent), and no interest accruing at the time. And it's always something like that... and the sad thing is that, those opportunities that come purely from luck just don't happen for some of us. I'm sorry for your loss and I hope you're in a more stable place now.

[@iknowright140]

I started over around 30, got out of a toxic relationship, ran away overseas and spent every cent I had, came home and lived in a uni student share house, got a full time job, got a new relationship, saved up and got my own apartment. I’m 36 now - you can start over any time you need to. Good luck ❤

[@invader_britt]

Wow I turned 30 last year, got divorced, moved into my own apartment, paid off debt and have 2 jobs now as well. Like if this isn't my whole story. I feel so validated, I remember some girl tried to crap on my whole existence because I tried to offer her some advice when she mentioned she she lives off her husband, doesn't do anything daily but brunch and yoga. I was accused of not being a "soft life girly" when I had to explain that was the issue I was too sheltered for 8 years and my husband took care of everything, I didn't plan or myself up for my future and it was sososo hard reestablishing myself in the real world because I literally went from my moms home to my husband's home; I was always taken care of unfortunately and it crippled me in a way. But now I am 1 year down and working on buying my home early next year.

[@firelunamoon]

😮 much better to be a smart, independent woman is better than being a helpless, dependent child who defines her life by a social media trend!

[@marriejames01]

I have a friend that did brunch and yoga. She’s now a divorced single mother of two on welfare. Her ex had a commission based job and is no longer trying. Spousal support is basically nonexistent.

[@gailainsley6939]

@@marriejames01. That’s why they target younger women because they don’t know any better. There should’ve been paperwork in place to ensure that she gets something out of it but no..

[@andrewkifee381]

Why divorce so young?? Marriage is a scam nowadays. People don't even last more than 2years. Sex and relationships should be fully transactional now.

[@Laz_RS]

When I was 29 I lost my son, my father and my business all within a few months. Three years later I was crippled, homeless and bankrupt. Learning how money works was very empowering towards my comeback.

[@runemagged21]

❤

[@m1997]

I’m so sorry for your loss and I wish you the best going forward 💔

[@oneofthoseguys2019]

How did you lose your son?

[@215ariley]

im 32. my divorce was finalized last month after being separated for 2 years. then last september i got fired from my job. 6 months later ive finished coding school and am trying to find a job in tech😅😬. I wouldnt be in the financial position to handle this without all Ive learned from this channel(i started watching when I was 24 right after I got married). While fear and anxiety still plague me, ive never been more optimistic about my future. Love seeing a story i could relate to so much. Thanks Chelsea and Alex for the great video and conversation!

[@thesecretshade]

Any tips?

[@215ariley]

​@@thesecretshade oh gosh i hate to sound cliche but setting financial goals(eg. buying property, 2 vacations a year, buy a car) and budgeting to meet those goals. give yourself grace and time. in moments of doubt, i always remind myself that there have been many thing ive gone through that i thought were impossible at the time, and i got through them, so now wont be any different.

[@cosmicjourney8629]

Great tips 🎉❤

[@rosef.3741]

I love how much more diverse your content is becoming from what it already was ! I recently had to start over from zero and I’m in my thirties and this is just so relatable to me. Really loving tfd content lately.

[@xm2895]

Idk she always subtly criticizes religious people, I hope the channel becomes diverse enough to include the point of view of all these different communities in a non judgmental way

[@rosef.3741]

@@xm2895 I’m evangelical Christian and practicing. I will only speak about this video because I haven’t noticed it in other videos. I haven’t seen every video either to be fair. but I think that in this context the question she asked was valid. I’m divorced and it is something that a lot of Christians do generally worry about and in some churches divorce can be something that is frowned upon or pushes ppl out etc. the church I grew up in was very much like this and it was a huge 5k member congregation

[@jennyjenny3531]

I started at zero at age 33 with no job, no driver's license, no phone, and two young children when my relationship imploded unexpectedly. I had been a stay at home Mom for 10 years, so my resume was outdated and paltry. I started by cleaning houses and working in retail, then moved up to a government job and slowly saved up an emergency fund, got driving lessons, a phone, and paid of all of my debt. Now, 5 years later, I'm in a much better financial situation and working my way up in my job. My kids are thriving and the future looks bright. It's not easy, but if I can do it, so can you. One foot in front of the other, and when you fall, pick yourself up again with dignity. You can do this, just like this woman has shared in this video, and so many more in the comments

[@lanalipstickIRL]

I was 30 years old when my husband packed my things and moved me out of my home in September. I had no choice but to move in with my dad. In May I lost my job, my mom had a mental health emergency and was in jail, and I had my first panic attack. All within a few days. That was 10 years ago. I had zero. A lot can change in 10 years. I am a different person and in a different financial situation. Life can change and you can flower in the weeds.

[@gailainsley6939]

In astrology getting married before 27-30 is known as ‘bad luck’. I’m not surprised it didn’t work out for many and 30 seems to be the magic number.

[@Dweeble233]

So you cheated on him eh?

[@lanalipstickIRL]

@@Dweeble233 you assume because he made me leave I cheated? Wrong. He told me he didn’t love me anymore and said if I didn’t leave he would stop paying the mortgage and destroy my credit. Just another keyboard board Karen (weeble).

[@shefali567]

You can hear the pain in her voice when she talk about her divorce 😢💔 hope she heals from this and finds someone who treats her right 🤍

[@jackbauer562]

Started from zero due separation at 41 then got laid off 2 months. Those are the best things happened to me…

[@nadiadansani2139]

If you’re comfortable, can you elaborate further?

[@jackbauer562]

@@nadiadansani2139 i meant, leaving my comfort zone gave me many opportunities. Its self adjust. Quality of life is better and i became closer to God.

[@Cauldron6]

I’m 34 and my career has fallen apart because of my mental health and my neurodivergence catching up to me. I really needed this perspective. Thank you for hosting this wonderful guest and for rolling out relevant and excellent content!

[@SlickSimulacrum]

Our society is so brutal these days, that I suspect the number of people who fall off by 30-40 is going to be staggering to see in data. I'm neurodivergent, and fell off 7 years ago. Recovery may or may not be possible. My plans take into account the much slower pace that my aging neurodivergence allows, but also has very little ability for competitive pace. I will be relegated to perpetual poverty under permanent disability if I fail only a few more times in my life. I will definitely never have a retirement, or any accumulation for the future. That much I have just accepted as inevitable. My reality is that mental health probably isn't something that can be under control. And so I must exist in our brutal society with those crippling disabilities. Our society does not provide any room for us. We are treated like discarded waste. I hope yours is a temporary downspell.

[@racheljoy3737]

same 🧡

[@courtneyharley9377]

Baby, listen. I am a huge fan of this channel, but this particular episode is soooo triggering for me. (Not in a bad way. This just hit me emotionally because it resonates with my own story.) Alex, I am grateful for how vulnerable you allowed yourself to be to tell your story. I also went through a divorce, I felt the same emotions, I lost my job weeks before we filed for a divorce and I was a mess. Thank God for therapy. Thank you so much. You have such a kind spirit and I hope God continues to bless your life and expedite your healing process.

[@iamemilytrevor]

This is the kind of real life money content we need ❤ thank you!

[@zcapari]

thank youuu I feel like I'd been one of the salty commenters who said "stop just interviewing social media people about social media" and this is so much better. Doesn't apply to me in my life right now, but it's so much more relatable and interesting

[@mizzmolly7649]

Your greatest gift is that you're only 29. I didn't even start investing until I got a great paying job at age 33. Not only will you be just fine. You will thrive. Be extremely excited for the future. ❤

[@thefinancialbuddy]

Alex is such a superwoman. I can't imagine what if I were in her situation. All three events are traumatic. Going through 1 at a time is already hard enough. And because she is open and calm enough to share all these publicly, my hats off to you on this, Alex. I don't know any other words I can use to show my appreciation to her and I wish you all the best, Alex.

[@palmer5555]

Just know it may seem like the end of the world, but you still (hopefully) have so many years ahead of you at 30. You’re just starting to put a dent into adulthood. I understand this realization doesn’t immediately fix a broken heart and a low bank balance, but you will come out of a situation like this with so much more resiliency, strength, compassion and excitement for the next few chapters. This is what ‘adulting’ truly looks like, not just signing a lease, showing up at work on time & paying your utilities bill. 💪💜

[@racheljoy3737]

WOW normal people are sooo much less of a nightmare to interview than the handful of authors and gurus from last season 😂 I loved this conversation and could really relate to her experience of identity loss after losing a job/major relationship changes. She inspires me to keep chipping away at my debt, I can almost see the tiny light at the end of the tunnel 💛

[@jae-annedanae4512]

I really appreciate her transparency with this and discussing her identity and the difficulties of divorce. Also really appreciated her transparency with her salary because she really didn’t have to

[@alyssa0101]

I'm 42 and starting over from scratch with a preteen. So if I got this so do you.

[@SuperMarkizas]

My story, I started over at 33, and moved away completely from my Master's specialisation. Took some courage, but all is going well, with continuous skill development

[@milikoshki]

total aside, but Alex is so pretty it's ridiculous.

[@msmiami212]

Gorgeous 🥰

[@bweb6]

This video has popped up in my feed today at exactly the right moment! I'm in very similar circumstances too following a failed relationship and a change of career choice.

[@magdalini84]

Can you do also starting from zero at 40? 😅

[@sarahleeblanc8274]

What kind of foolishness is that? We put too much on age limits. Abraham Lincoln became president of the U.S. at 52 years old. Just stop the nonsense.

[@kateharding3214]

I can really relate to feeling a sense of let down after reaching a big goal. I paid off my little house a couple of years ago and had that same sense that life would be abundant now. Bam, cost of living increase in all bills, big home maintenance bills like roof repairs. It is great, it is a privilege, but worries don't end just like that

[@TonyaS]

What a smart, courageous young woman. Despite hardships, you had plans for yourself, which made it probably easier to cope. I wish you nothing but the best and you're going to go far in life. You have an amazing head on your shoulders!

[@user-li2vl4yd1x]

A powerful 29 year old divorced lady. She's got all her life ahead of her. Keep at it, sweetheart. Breathe and keep going. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@AnneAgain2022]

Needed this as someone in a similar boat

[@jlypham]

Hang in there!

[@Albertdoessomething-df9vr]

I was 45 years old when I started all over, with 3 kids and no car. I did a tech boot camp, got a very well-paying job to take care of my kids

[@libbysworld7649]

This was sincere, moderately raw and very real. I appreciate this, very much!

[@TJ-yv3kp]

I just want to say like others thanks for keeping content real, fresh and diverse. A quick note on finance males/couples divorcing or ending relationships without a mention....can you make a video or we talk about the phenomenon that is Gary V. Yes more business than finance but...This man was the hype man of hustle culture, NFTs and etc while being extremely private about wife/kids...now with a beautiful young educated businesswoman reality personality. As a woman, I never questioned his need for a private life...but tired of alot of men who preach hustle culture while woman in background "hustling" to keep home and everything else together🤔 Just my honest rant 😂

[@m1997]

Alex is an absolute joy, thank you so much for inviting her on your platform! So many fantastic lessons to take home from this episode, financial and life-wise

[@PresentingReality]

This is very relatable. Even though I’m on the other side of loosing everything, it makes me feel less alone, listening and reading the comments. Really admire the vulnerability of this guest. ❤

[@bethanythomas-acevedo9807]

I found this video by typing in “Divorced & laid off.” I was starting to feel like the only person in the world going through both at the same time. 31 & healing through it myself as I watch all my friends begin their marriages. I got teary when you spoke about losing these pieces of your identity that were so key to you & feeling like the biggest loser. I have felt both of those things so deeply. I’m also big into personal finance & my emergency savings have quite literally saved me during all this. This was a breath of fresh air. Best of luck to you!!

[@TechSav18]

I moved back home in my Mid 20's too and it's one of the best decision I've so far in the past 4 years.

[@jasminew8442]

I am she and she is me 😅 trying to navigate a divorce with someone who I still care about while still prioritizing me and my child was very difficult. I hate confrontation, I want to be fair, but divorce changes people

[@lisav6583]

Your guest is so sweet. She is very easy to listen to. 🥰

[@nichelle-al]

Alex - you’re amazing. Thank you so much for sharing your story! SO much overlap, starting with our name (my family refers to me as Lex). I’m 26 - i got married in 2019 and i’ve been separated since December 2022. 2022 was the worst year of my life those far - splitting from your best friend is truly gut-wrenching, and i, too, would not wish that on my worst enemy. many, many tears shed. i also struggle with financial anxiety which has prompted me to get a second job as well. i’m not quite debt free yet. in fact, my goal is to be debt free by my 30th birthday. i’ve relied heavily on my faith to maintain my sanity through this period of my life. i also work in tech, and though i’ve worked very hard to get here, i frequently question my career choice. every day, i leave work utterly and mentally drained. there’s much more to the story, but net net, i so appreciate your candor. you are so beautiful, so resilient, and so inspiring. i’m sending you all the love in the world, from Dallas to Atlanta ♥️

[@Hiltond13]

This kind of conversation is rare in podcast form and Chelsea is definitely onto something about the honesty of men with similar issues. Like Alex, I'm the one who wanted to try to make the marriage work but it's not really up to me. I was also laid off in October, and it was really nice to hear someone going through the exact same situation and how they have dealt with it. Go Alex!

[@Justauri-asdfghjkl]

At 24, I lost everything after losing my apartment and moving back home has been extremely traumatic even though my parents are doing the best they can. It's been so hard and so lonely. The job search has been death by a thousand papercuts

[@chelseashurmantine8153]

Girl this is so what I signed up for! As soon as I’m no longer laid off ima get over that pay wall lol

[@abigailspooner436]

This woman is so sweet. I really wish the best for her!! Thanks for sharing your story Alex

[@user-sf3ri1hq8x]

What a great video! Kudos to Alex for telling her story. My divorce from my ex-husband was final just after I turned 25. It took me years to clean up the financial mess that we both contributed to. Getting married again without a pre-nup would absolutely not be an option for me, which is probably one of the reasons I’m still single.

[@Siures]

I am happily married at 33 now. We have two kids. But when we married I was fresh from university and didn’t know if I would work in my trainee job (Ieft after 2 years). I didn’t have much savings on my own. But even as a student I always saved and it built up. Then it was enough to move and find a place on my own if necessary. Now it’s more than I ever had. I could get the money in a few days and it’s enough to start a new life if necessary. I don’t think that I will need it anytime soon. We just bought a house and I didn’t touch it. But it’s there. It’s available if anything goes wrong. And it’s MINE. And in best case it makes retirement easier. (For context: we don’t earn that much but education in Germany is not expensive and I had a funding for gifted students, so no debt there. We are quite frugal, otherwise saving and buying a home at the same time would not be an option).

[@nicoles2159]

Thank you so much for sharing such a wide variety of experiences. I know you're helping so many people who can relate.

[@peacefuljoy1197]

I am so grateful for this interview and for this comment section 🙏🏾✨

[@superstelly]

Really appreciated this conversation! Thank you Chelsea and Alex! 💕

[@user-hq2mm4cq5o]

Eh. When I was 29 (two years ago) in a timespan of literally months I went from a long term partner + stable life in a cheap rented flar + successful own business to absolute mental wreck after being cheated on, spiralling financially to the point of having to close my business because I couldnt provide services anymore and I got scammed into an expensive "business mastermind" that was utter crap. To say it was hard is the biggest understatement ever. I'm doing better now, but it's still difficult.

[@ultramarinewaters9325]

Wow this was an insightful discussion. I’m hoping that 2024 brings the best for both Alex and TFD!

[@DrPositivelyKai]

Thank you so much for this conversation!!!

[@isamgc]

Loved seeing this pop up in my subs - I can relate as my divorce was finalized last year. Still living with my parents, trying to figure out what’s next for me in the next 5 years. ❤

[@Rocioslane]

I really love her honesty and vulnerability ♥️

[@studiomanzi]

This is useful information for people in the same demographic as your guest ❤

[@Dweeble233]

Divorced my first wife and started from scratch. I had squirreled away $10k before the breakup. This funded new furniture for my apartment and eventually a portion of the down payment on my first house. Eventually remarried, children, a larger now paid off home and sizeable investments. I am the millionaire next door. Life is good.

[@pro100olga]

I just want to send all the best wishes to Alex, I hope all the worst things are behind her ❤ thank you for sharing your story

[@Rocioslane]

Her energy is infectious 🩵

[@kay123nay]

This was beautiful, so well done.

[@alannaalbritton381]

Love love love it! Appreciate the discussion and diversity!

[@attedau6235]

Fantastic episode, loved her perspective so much

[@smilesallround]

Thank you for this interview! ❤🙌🏿 I really love your channel

[@krystaljane7109]

love alex!! thank you for being honest and real

[@latoyatangelo]

I thoroughly enjoyed this episode, I wish Lexi all the best.

[@m_here1]

I’m so glad you’re starting to talk to real people and get diverse experiences!

[@aishahb8336]

I loved this episode - this series has been so nice and reassuring to listen to. Like a true sense of relatability

[@zee-zm1io]

The content I signed up for!!! I haven’t even started listening but I’m excited

[@marriejames01]

Oh, is she the first BP? 👀Let me scroll through. This just popped up for me.

[@naymay2150]

This was incredible 👏 thank you both so much for this 🙏 💞

[@Kemzozo]

Loved this episode! Money matters have an emotional component that people don’t really talk about

[@agie_2671]

I haven't started the video yet but based on the title it's right on time 🙌🏿

[@cyberpunkalphamale]

Thanks to her for sharing.

[@janinakoppe]

I am starting from zero again at 27 so this is cool to see that I am not alone ya know 🙈

[@phyliciajoykloes]

Wow, what an episode!

[@GulmiraKuzhagaliyeva]

I love you TFD team! ❤❤❤

[@JustHereForTheFun]

Starting over is hard. I did it in 2019. But you can do it ! Especially if you are in an abusive situation please know that it is possible to start over. And if you don’t have a personal community to help you their are other resources available.

[@curlieeloks3032]

I lift Alex up in prayer ❤ May God always comfort her and bring her happiness and make her stronger and bring her success peace and love through His love and mercy ❤thank you for the transparency and spreading knowledge I’m so glad the people at her church was supportive . God definitely will use Alex as a testimony and help others in this trial in her life . Brown girlies, it’s okay to date anyone no matter race . I think this may be the issue with finding a good suitor

[@Rocioslane]

I can’t wait to have an emergency fund again

[@nikkijohnson5147]

I appreciate her story but I worry she’s so worried. It sounds like she’s on a great path but be careful with that extra workload. My son is 22 and will have to live extremely financially practically throughout his upcoming graduate school for his PhD. He’ll work 20 hours of week on campus on top of the classes then his research and that is already plenty of work. You are young and you sound like you are on a solid financial path, let that reassure you and allow yourself rest and fun. You have made smart decisions but also you need to enjoy life. (I’m 42 now with a vastly different life but I’ve learned to balance enjoyment with financial responsibility.) Good-luck.

[@PrincessSharifa434]

How cruel that he had you leave your joint apartment to move in with his parents, constructively leaving her homeless. Thankfully Alex had the ability to move in with her mom. I have heard of so many variations of Alex’s story. We have to ensure, especially in these times, that we have robust emergency savings before tackling debt, so that if anything happens - divorce, job loss, etc. - we have the cash reserves to go THAT DAY to an apartment and put first month’s & security, then spend the intentional time to go for a new job/career avenue. Lastly, debt-free is not just an identity, if is one of Alex’s core values and speaks to whether a person coming into her life would be compatibility in a partnership with her. People divorce over finances all the time. Very slippery slope here.

[@pro100olga]

Sorry if this is a silly question, but why moving back with parents is considered to be so bad in the US (by both children and parents)? especially given that houses in the US are generally larger compared to Europe, for example

[@joellea-b.5519]

It's a part of the culture of individualism and success. Living independently, being able to afford a house or a fanxy apartment is an aspiration in American culture. It's a sign of success, freedom to rule one's own house, and a sign of wealth

[@thatjillgirl]

It depends on your parents. With some parents, it can work out just fine. With parents like my own, it's not terrible, but it slowly wears you down because they can't quite fully absorb that you're a grown adult, and when you move back in with them, they return to the past roles of parenting you and treating you like a child when that's not what you need at this point in your life. I moved back in with my parents for a little while after school and it drove me absolutely insane. They are nice people, but they still related to me like I was a teenager they needed to take care of. Little things like having them worry about me going to the store by myself just drove me nuts. I had no sense of autonomy. Our relationship is much better when we live apart. And then of course, some people have parents who are some flavor of abusive, and it's truly miserable (or even dangerous) to move back in with them. It just really, really depends.

[@raedusoleil6375]

Our culture sees it as “failing”. There’s a trope of the 30 yr old who still lives in their mom’s basement, & it’s seen as like the absolute worst place you can be in your adulthood. In our media, it’s been portrayed as being lazy and unambitious, which coupled with our hustle culture is like the worst thing you can be. Our ideals haven’t caught up w the financial reality that housing is just not affordable here anymore and hasn’t been for a while.

[@pro100olga]

​@@joellea-b.5519 but renting with a roommate is also not much individualism and success :)

[@NIO623]

Renting with a room mate is different from moving back home to pare. Your room mates will pay half or rent and utilitie and will definitely not feed you.The parents will .thats the difference. ​@pro100olga

[@itsthequeenfatima]

Bravo to you Alex! It sounds like you were able to make beautifully informed decisions! Side note: 20h a week plus a fulltime job is taxing! Please prioritize rest if you can.

[@PatriciaAppelquist]

Okay, Thank you for introducing us to another fabulous woman and I will follow Alex. Now, can I start fan girling over Chelsea's outfits sorry but I am like spending way too much time watching the videos for outfit inspirations. Maybe list them in the description? Sorry not sorry for loving financial fashion ;)

[@drkarenbukharibukhari9931]

My world was changed upside down

[@chica212]

Looking for Alex’s podcast or social media.

[@andreahernandez1334]

Hello. I am 54 years old and I lost my job a year ago and lost my step mother in the past month. No college degree, my marriage is ending. Need help to start from zero at 54.

[@nadjak3410]

Being single and unemployed isn't starting from zero. Like there's so many accomplishments beyond your relationship status and job title.

[@carpediem44]

Hey Chelsea, this may seem very basic and you've probably already discussed it, but could you explore the tax ramifications of marriage? How many women know that when you marry someone with federal tax debt that debt becomes YOURS?

[@jeanjeang8914]

100% agree debt free doesn't automatically equal carefree life..

[@alisonmartin3856]

Chelsea, I love your channel, your mission, and your perspective. I might not be representative of your current audience, but I am a mom of two, late forties, recently divorced. All of my friends in similar situations are really struggling financially. My professional salary no longer covers my bills and groceries and basic needs. I am accumulating debt and not saving as much as I want for retirement. I own some real estate, but I don’t feel like I will get ahead if I move that money. Moving in with family is off the table. A second job seems inaccessible. It feels like the only way out is to find another romantic partner to share expenses. Gah! Please keep my profile in mind as you look for guests and topics. 💋

[@carpediem44]

Have you considered a shared living situation with an extremely responsible, trustworthy woman with good communication skills? And VET her. Check public records. Check her background. Trust AND verify.

[@JaydenJayden-mm2kr]

She said logical advice not emotional, i was waiting for logical resolutions

[@kdc3065]

The host's comments about dating in your 30s are unexpectedly passive and insulting. There's nothing wrong with being divorced, first of all. Second of all, the girl is 30. She can date some young 22 year old whipper snappers if she wants. She can date divorced people, she can date people in their 30s and 40s who never settled down, she can decide to wait longer and date when she's ready. The tone makes it sound like everyone gets one life partner, and all the good ones are gone- the only ones available will come with baggage. Ugh. Not everyone settles down at the same time, and not everyone settles down at all.

[@prettypractical3372]

Alex, working 60 hours a week and working on a podcast is a lot. Please take care.

[@meditationzone4599]

I'm so sorry for your divorce Alex 😭

[@carpediem44]

I don’t have any credit cards. I do own a home that's paid for. No regrets.

[@WatermelonSugar1209]

Being divorced so young and losing your job must suck!

[@betterthanthedaybefore8090]

Hold up! You can get a refund if you were paying on your loan during the pandemic??? Tell me more!

[@abel.morelos]

Unfortunately, you can no longer get refunds for payments you made during the COVID-19 payment pause. The refund benefit ended on Aug. 28, 2023. Source: studentaid.gov/announcements-events/covid-19.

[@thatjillgirl]

Only if you then qualified for the debt forgiveness, which wound up being drastically toned down due to the legal challenges.

[@TheMarkGoudy]

So rich parents, as always, is the answer.