Dracula - Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN)

Join Count Nerd for the 2008 Halloween special dedicated to all things Drac, taking us from humble beginnings of text based games to the awe and wonder that is (cough).... full motion video. This episode charts The Fanged One's miss-steps onto home consoles with 8 Reviews across multiple platforms ranging from 1980 - 1993. 'What a horrible night to have a curse' - indeed...
Did you know that the Prince of Darkness wears Reeboks? Or that he can be killed by touching dogs? Prepare to be scared when he sinks his teeth into NES educational mathematics..
This is Angry Videogame Nerd episode 57.
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[@daviddamasceno6063]

Dracula: "I was called here by humans, who wish to pay me tribute!" Richter: "Well, my man, I'd say you've got some grave problems." Dracula: "Perhaps the.... wait, did you just call me 'my man'?!"

[@pezelma1446]

Your words are as empty as your soul

[@countdread6467]

"What is a man?!!"

[@Ordscare]

@@countdread6467 *my man.

[@lord_berkut2426]

Now all I can see is Richter in those tacky 90’s clothes on a skateboard while this goes on

[@TheLambdaTeam]

@@countdread6467 "A miserable pile of secrets." "But enough talk, have at you!"

[@ruthmcnally310]

Fred Fuchs "Don't know how to "Fuchs" something."

[@walugusgrudenburg3068]

ruth mcnally *Dont know how to “Fred” something

[@dorkfish1275]

"don't know how to rape something"

[@waycnf7229]

Don’t know how to shove a whole dog up my ass to lick off

[@adamuzumaki98]

@@waycnf7229 Go to Hell Don't know what Hell is.

[@YuukiTakemoto1996]

Your avatar lmao the pony

[@sanadyiohneGaming]

9:40 the birth of a legend

[@charlottecorday8494]

He's up there with Kojima

[@bdhc731]

It is name,it is not even funny it is if you have 10 years

[@Thecoolguy463]

“Who would call Dracula my man?” is the most underrated line in AVGN history

[@genevalong8383]

Ha ha make me laugh every time

[@capofthink]

WHAT IS A *_"MAN???!!!"_* A MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS!!!!!!!

[@xalm8761]

I would, but also my family is Romanian.

[@hassanasadi2132]

dude 🤣🤣🤣

[@YuukiTakemoto1996]

Blade

[@TheBigDynamo]

"Who would call Dracula my man?" That's my favorite line.

[@YuukiTakemoto1996]

Simon Belmont, obviously.

[@oscarramirez2697]

@@YuukiTakemoto1996 true

[@1Sandwitch1]

me

[@johnnyklebitzrevenge4793]

Mine would be "AWW F I MEAN FUCK!"

[@SentientPotatoXIII]

His gf

[@jignjorf9076]

You gotta admit, those voice samples for The Count's Countdown are really good for an NES game.

[@1amlevel]

Compared to ghostbusters its a masterpiece, my bad I mean "GUOSTBUSTURRRRRRRRDZZZZ"

[@CodySweeso]

+LE\/Ǝ˩ Hey at least it's better than "BEEE-17 BAAAWWMBERRRRR!!!"

[@omegarugal9283]

+Josh Walker the NES had 1 PCM channel and the quality was good, the problem was the ROM space such samples took, in a simple game like "countdown" it was possible...

[@googleuser9383]

HAHAHAHA! FIND TEN! HAHAHAHA!

[@williamdrum9899]

@@omegarugal9283 That's probably why you could either run or hop, not both

[@Ultrasteel74]

2:47 I laughed way more times than I’d like to admit

[@torkelsvenson6411]

I honestly think it's one of his funniest jokes

[@LegitMan335]

69 likes 😏🤣

[@DkViking1]

@@LegitMan335 70! 😉

[@avoasemota8450]

164!

[@thema1998]

​@@avoasemota8450 383 now! 😃

[@benjaminnanney1446]

I love how aggressively he always puts the games in

[@MYNAMACHEF]

how much do you think Fred Fuchs was bullied as a kid

[@greatestever184]

what makes you think I was?

[@MYNAMACHEF]

fred fuchs N-Nothing Fred FUCHS

[@TheGollddMAN]

He was not bullied, he was fuched.

[@mikejarrett3297]

Almost as much as uwe fuchs

[@jerichamesclammay3107]

+fred fuchs shut the fuch up, Fred.

[@bloodrunsclear]

Fred Fuchs actually also produced the Godfather movies O_o

[@jamesmorrison2595]

I'm guessing its a different one. If not that is incredible!

[@juant8631]

Well, one of them. Part III

[@deoxysandmew2162]

+Octavio89 He fuched it up. XD

[@TheDisney1901]

+bloodrunsclear And the Secret Garden. -S.

[@warioland523]

+bloodrunsclear Fred Fuchs is also the name of the leader of the Sons of Kojima who do commentaries on a guy's garbage let's plays.

[@hunterolaughlin]

10:33 - 10:35. That is the most funniest death screen I’ve seen for a movie licensed game. It’s like making a Star Wars game and the death screen is Obi Wan’s “No!” from “The Phantom Menace”. Just picture that. Lol

[@jeffery5716]

Ironic

[@soorajsurya5650]

11:19 and thats how James Started the Epidemic.

[@mcj88]

Even though it wasn't released, I think a Dracula-themed game with Reebok product placement is one of the strangest concepts I've ever heard of.

[@XolTheGreat]

makes about as much sense as the bambi godzilla crossover that was gonna happen

[@101Volts]

@@XolTheGreat That exists? ...There's also that Scooby Doo and Courage the Cowardly Dog crossover, *but that happened,* and I'm not sure I approve of it. Someone told me that it tried explaining the weirdness in Courage, and I don't think that's a great idea. It ruins the mystery.

[@XolTheGreat]

@@101Volts I loved that crossover. But og courage can't be beat. Easily one of the best shows ever

[@GermanLollyganLP]

9:43 A legend was born.

[@justincameron9661]

If you noticed when he stepped on the bat he had on the Reebok pumps

[@SkyExplosion]

That Keanu clip was in the movie. but with the bad sound its more hilarious in the game.

[@armedlove14]

Hnnnghhrrrrr

[@Davidovar34]

The legendary Fred Fuchs episode :D

[@TimmyHD]

Fred Fuchs

[@user-ui2tz5tu5y]

really legendary

[@TimmyHD]

Hy- chan Fred Fuchs

[@Keullo-eFIN]

You mean Fred Fucks?

[@Naotechd_Out]

Freddy Fazbear Maybe ? Well we won't forget Freddy Fuckboy

[@samji_art]

the origin of Fred Fuchs!

[@jimbojones8063]

You could say he Fred, Fuchs real well.

[@daniearmstrong5656]

+jimbo jones Fuch is actually German for fox

[@creadishcread2243]

yeah FOX up the AHSS

[@astro6239]

Hes actually a tv producer. Mustve been involved in tne movie or some shit.

[@greatestever184]

the origin of the greatest game of all time!

[@junior214223]

"Who would call Dracula my man?" That quote gets me everytime

[@CreesNostalgiaHut]

Simon or blade..

[@DarkMirria1]

“Who would call Dracula “my man”?” I dunno, Death?

[@unwelldanny7108]

I was thinking more of Simon Belmont.

[@maxgreenluvr96]

"Don't know how to 'fuck' something" My sides have ascended to heaven.

[@joseagustincuesta]

***** Which song again?

[@joseagustincuesta]

***** This one? en.wikipedia.org/wiki/O_Come,_All_ye_Faithful

[@joseagustincuesta]

***** Thank you.

[@greymajickjedi]

That's an even more hilarious text-only joke than: *"CONGLATURATION!"*

[@FoggedTears]

How about you're winner from Big Rigs lol.

[@GeorgRockallSchmidt]

...I count the candles on the shelf, when I'm alone I count myself...

[@unwelldanny7108]

I fuck slowly, slowly getting faster, faster THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN OF ULTIMATE DESTINY

[@javathehunt790]

...The spiders on the wall and cobwebs in the hall...

[@wallycastagnir]

1 hahahaha

[@dragonempress8367]

Ow the EDGE

[@cobalt7248]

While I am in the comments, I "count" every Dracula in fiction

[@Eastsid3]

LOL I just realized Nerd is wearing the reebok's he showed off early in the vid at 11:22

[@prostratic]

I just realized your mother.

[@Someone-gy2rd]

@@prostratic Dont like your own comment.

[@unbindingfloyd]

I have re watched this for years every Halloween and never noticed that.

[@jakeknapp6833]

Can you tell him that also tell him about Superman 64 the sonic games bubsy spudermangames batman games Superman for nes Ljn games aren’t bad some are hard sega cd sega 32x colecovision intelivision atari Jaguar that they are good okay and everyone and critics to change their minds of being good you know they are good okay

[@jakeknapp6833]

Dracula for Vic 20 is confusion

[@J_Rossi]

"Don't know how to f*** something...." And that, latest and gentlemen.... is the epitome of artificial intelligence in gaming.

[@Hourglass36]

Drac's night out is just reverse Castlevania. You play as Dracula, you wanna LEAVE the castle, and you can't kill anything

[@SeanWeird]

Did the nerd actually buy a pair of those shoes just for the 5 second joke?

[@AlkisGD]

***** - I've often wondered where he gets all that stuff. Some of the rarer things in his collection must be hard to come by and/or expensive. Is the show _that_ successful that these costs are acceptable? Seems so.

[@dkupke]

Άλκης Δ. Some of it might actually be donated by fans

[@dkupke]

flipper5104 Well, for the purposes of this episode they didn't need to. He doesn't actually wear it, just holds it up and says something about it.

[@mikelonas4508]

Daniel Ryan he is wearing the shoes when he was stepping on the bat

[@greymajickjedi]

This guy gets *so much* fan art and crafts sent to him, (and he has so many *shameless* plugs) i'll bet he is to the point where he could just call up Reebok's ad department and get a pair delivered. Unless that's where Fred Fuchs is now employed......

[@pikkon899]

"What's Dracula's deal? He's got big head and his face is like, duuuhhh!!!" xD That was great!

[@w13d0w]

I never realized that in the end when he's stomping on the bat, he's wearing the Reebok Pumps

[@worstcaseontario12]

Somehow, even if I haven't watched AVGN in a long time, I always end up finding myself watching the Halloween episodes around the Fall

[@Red88Rex]

+Killhelm II Gotta come back for Fred Fuchs

[@Nathanp4]

+Red88Rex I agree

[@FoggedTears]

+Red88Rex Gotta love Fred Fuchs.

[@jaedonfutrell]

+Red88Rex agreed

[@FurbyParade226]

Yep

[@ZorotheGallade]

Ah, text parsing games... "Wake up" CAN'T "WAKE UP" "Wake me up inside" CAN'T "WAKE UP"

[@NoEntertainment]

Save me

[@AeroRanger100]

Brilliant XD Imagine the game's response with "SAVE ME."

[@juliabailey9685]

+No. Call my name and save me from the dark.

[@Bauglir100]

>"go west" LIFE IS PEACEFUL THERE >"go west" IN THE OPEN AIR >"go west" WHERE THE SKIES ARE BLUE >"go west" THIS IS WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO

[@Marjill_katzen888]

Don't know how to "WAKE" something

[@Eliasdbr]

Imagine the Nerd gets in contact with the real Fred Fuchs and makes with him a nerd episode

[@jcruz5050]

He did

[@amaruqlonewolf3350]

@@jcruz5050 Gilbert Gottfried isn't Fred Fuchs.

[@daveisabeastly2024]

Who else watches these yearly during Halloween season

[@GolfYourself]

We all watch these yearly, everyday.

[@jako90201]

Lol my history teachers name is Mr. Fuchs

[@jako90201]

***** Yes...yes he does. He actually Fucks my home economics teacher. It's....interesting :/

[@voLumez]

Slim Shady does he pronounce it "fucks" or "fukes"? or "fuchess"?

[@jako90201]

voLumez It's pronounced like "fooks"

[@dkupke]

Slim Shady We had a teacher in my school named miss Condum.

[@nex1788]

I thought it was pronounced "fyooks"

[@Supore]

2:48 Best moment in gaming history. Ever.

[@pasta189]

Yes

[@NodDisciple1]

Nah, Fred Fuchs was better. :P

[@esmooth919]

Sooop - that always cracks me up!

[@hansweiss469]

Yeah, but I don't know how to "FUCH" something either.

[@setsers1]

Sooop lol

[@p00yan]

Who would call Dracula"my man"? This was a very legit question.

[@Hei_Darkfire]

And then the bats got together and planned their revenge on humanity for killing them constantly.

[@CreesNostalgiaHut]

Does it go like jerma's rat movie but with bats????

[@chrisjenkins2099]

Reebok really narrowed down the best candidate for a game to promote their pumps. A basketball game? Nah, let's give them to fucking Dracula!

[@evicteetori8738]

Chris Jenkins I'm convinced

[@LegitMan335]

🧛 👟 👟 Ah ah ah ah, welcome to the space jam~! Bleh bleh bleh .

[@Skalopulton301]

Eat pillow. Yuck! Ok so I ate the pillow? I didn't expect that. XD

[@ExplorerDS6789]

So he's feeling a little... down in the mouth? (Mary Poppins).

[@adamuzumaki98]

@Michael Beld Eat grass. Yuck!

[@101Volts]

I guess he does eat it, feather or not he likes it. :p

[@luluthecat1570]

11:19 Real footage of how corona started -2008 colorized

[@saulgoodman4634]

My man transformed into Ozzy Osbourne

[@JaKack]

AGVN no…

[@kirbymarchbarcena]

Text based games may have been interesting in those days but to receive a "don't know how to fuck" reply from that game would really have started a meme revolution

[@okayyeahkolbe7335]

There is old AVGN and new AVGN, both have a specific charm to them...but there is no BAD AVGN.

[@gutspuck721]

I come from the distant future of 2018 to confirm that your comment is still valid even to this day!

[@rekius328]

yeep

[@ski4965]

Accept for Toxic Crusaders, but we don’t talk about that one...

[@klaushammer8687]

Plumbers don't wear ties. A game so bad even the review is bad. It happens

[@gator743]

@@klaushammer8687 how was it bad?

[@NBR696]

This guy makes the best analogies! 6:16 "He's got a big head and his face is like DUHHH!"

[@gabrielvillanuevaiii3926]

“The morning sun has vanquished the horrible crappy games”

[@Goldmight]

just imagine time travelling 10 years in the past, telling james he will eventually have fred fuchs be in your sketch and is played by gilbert gottfried.

[@fallkhild]

"Aw F I mean fuck!"

[@newkidatWCU]

I don't know why I laughed so hard when he's fighting the bat and there's the quick shot of James wearing the pumps, but I did

[@robotnikcentric64]

1:23 Man it's so funny when the Nerd was playing The Count to the end of the interactivity when he used the classy f bomb on the text and facepalmed when it said [I don't know how to "FUCK" something]. Lmao

[@SKeLeTrust]

I love how AVGN just can't get over his hatred of bats.

[@CreesNostalgiaHut]

And danny

[@cherryzombiezz]

I hope when his kid gets old enough to go on the computer, somebody will tell them to look up "AVGN".

[@BlamoStramo]

The Elusive Blue Skittle Imagine him having Sex

[@televisaoassassina9822]

Maybe his daughter will be his sucessor.

[@vasiliypupkin3239]

I would be proud of my dad.

[@DOSRetroGamer]

you think his kids don't know what he does for a living?

[@joeywalker2061]

His kids already know.

[@SpeedyEric1]

10:39- That clip WAS from the movie, where Keanu Reeve as John Harker is being held down on a bed, and Dracula's brides are eating a live baby. I think a better clip would have been Dracula laughing maniacally.

[@Cyberbuzz99]

I just realised at 2:27 that after he typed ‘go right’ and ‘go left’ to no success he typed ‘go away’ XD

[@OmnicidalClown1992]

2:45 Still to this day, one of my favorite parts in any AVGN episode.

[@TheMadman107]

this episode is probably one of the funniest, like the "don't know to fuck something", the UGH, the Bats, and of course Fred Fuchs

[@demontorch]

I'll give you 2 words. FUCK YOU

[@MetralletaLuis]

"oh, f! I mean fuck!" "I don't know how to FUCK something" "Fred Fucks" "is that clip even from the movie? I don't know maybe it's from Bill & Ted" This episode is just filled with great lines.

[@clintoncosby2233]

Oh, my god, it's Fred Fuchs!

[@luisgodinez8701]

Yes, it's Fred fuchs

[@CrazyKraut20]

Duper Gamer real animal

[@Astolfo2001]

Therapist: "Dripcula isn't real. He can't hurt you." Dripcula: 4:05

[@SKeLeTrust]

6:40 I think AVGN predicted Super Mario Run...

[@TheErikalovey]

Super Mario Jump should be a sequel

[@bringbackcaramel2302]

For the sesame street game, you have to give them credit for the voice!

[@SOIBand]

yeah sounded pretty good!

[@diegomendivil7101]

What the Ghostbusters game, I mean ***GOOOBUzzTUURS****

[@freezetile8588]

Ah-ah-ah!

[@unwelldanny7108]

@@freezetile8588 ONE AH AH AH, TWO AH AH AH, THREE AH AH AH

[@YoungLiam74]

"Oh F- I mean fuck!" One of the best lines ever. This is with a doubt one of the top 5 avgn vids ever. Can rewatch over and over and laugh everytime.

[@user-uh8pe8rh2l]

6:07 Echoes? I thought it was called reverb

[@oldstylegaming4655]

2:43 had me on the floor

[@thomaskloos6409]

4:40 "But you can't *count* on it most of the time." Fuckin... Nice one, James

+Thomas Kloos Ah Ah Ah!

[@VOIDSenseMusic]

+Thomas Kloos I don't think that was intentional.

[@thomaskloos6409]

Deroni76 I know, but I bet it was.

[@mcj88]

+Deroni76 Yeah, if it was intentional he would've said it during the Sesame Street game.

[@sanstheskeleton8011]

Nice pun indeed.

[@jamesdalebozeman]

I actually took the time to read up on the gameplay for The Count. As it turns out, the player character has been sent to defeat the vampire Count Dracula by the local Transylvanian villagers, and must obtain and use items from around the vampire's castle in order to defeat him. Players move from location to location, picking up any objects found and using them somewhere else to solve puzzles. So, basically, it's a text-based version of "Dracula: Origin" that takes place only in Transylvania, leaves the player-character's name a mystery, and has less plot. All in all, just stick to "Dracula: Origin". You'll be much better off.

[@CreesNostalgiaHut]

Call him simon,, every vampire killer should be named that..

[@mr.serious4329]

idk why but him wearing the reboks when stomping out the bat killed me

[@adamsarufan2656]

11:19 how covid began

[@kantanenakseli8886]

This is probably my favorite avgn episode actually. Its a plain and simple avgn action with not that many edits and not that long... But theres something genuinely awesome in this that get me To watch it everytime. Like it perfected the plain avgness

[@santasangre996]

i agree this is my favorite episode too. it's got that late night chill vibe

[@saminiemi4700]

Timelimit, worst thing in videogames

[@nightspawnson-of-luna4936]

Sami Niemi Well once I played this Game for the xbox It had a timed shooter level that didn't show the timer or where the buck i needed to go

[@ChaseMC215]

Open World, Best Thing in Videogames

[@MK12082]

Either that or escort missions.

[@ChaseMC215]

@@MK12082 Fuck escort mission, they fucking suck

[@derekj.tejeda267]

11:15 Yep, nowadays we feel the same as you, pal!

[@PoisonousPen]

“Who would call Dracula ‘my man’?” Is one of my favourite AVGN quotes of all time 😄

[@foxnfiends]

2:48 *dies laughing*

[@MrNodebate]

10:35: Yep, the clip is from the movie, it's from the scene where the dracula offers the baby to his underlings and Keanu Reeves is all "oh no, I gotta make a really disturbed facial expression..." (btw: Monica Belluci plays one of them in one of her earlier roles)

[@apollorock3r244]

7:05 “Why am I playing this?” I couldn’t stop laughing at that part. XD

[@CreesNostalgiaHut]

That's what i would think when i played a children's game..

[@moonfestal]

It's been 10 years and the quality is still there. Damn. It makes me happy knowing content creators like James Rolfe exist.

[@Mistertbones]

Two of my favorite AVGN moments are in this episode. 2:48 and 9:43

[@Nbdestryer]

"Fuck you" I don't know how to "Fuck" something XD

[@THEMOECOOPERSHOWTM]

9:48 what you came here for 😏

[@sageparra4956]

Love this episode. The theme, the games, and the nod to old silent horror movies with the way it was shot.

[@AeroRanger100]

"He's got a big head and his face is like DUUUUUUUUUUH..." I love that line. XD

[@jacobhellon4418]

9:14 Awww F I mean Fuck Doesn't that count as an outtake? It's an intake of an outtake!

[@junior214223]

Audio wise, this is my favorite AVGN episode. Just so satisfying to wear headphones while watching this one.

[@thebigjentz]

That rain in the background is just perfect

[@Mrguitarman791]

2:45 I still think that it’s the funniest thing in this episode. Since I was a teenager 2:48 is the actual moment.

[@thetf2channel]

Wait, who's this? Fred Fudges? Fred FUCKS? FRED FUCKS!

[@Ermahnerd]

I love how on Dracula for Intelevision, the sun (which kills you in the game) has a big smile on its face. It's the friendliest looking death sun ever.

[@PSqqp]

The morning sun has vanquished the horrible Nerd.

[@taffysaur]

That clip of Johnathan/Keanu screaming that plays when he dies is from when he sees the lady vampires eat the baby and finally loses his mind.

[@TheTechnoman7]

9:42 And so it began...

[@StephenDoherty1994]

"The music is just a scramble of 8-bit chaos." Careful AVGN, Jeroen Tel has a KZbin account...

[@zyzzy-ko4ww]

At least it's not justin bieber or pachelbel or nickelback or crazy bus (as in Arthur's least favourite song) or nails on a chalkboard.

[@noahadank409]

Anyone notice how he stomped the bat with the Reebok shoe? LOL

[@donthespotter6550]

I think this episode really shows his love for the horror genres

[@JoaoLucasK]

"Don't know how to "FUCK" something" I'm laughing so hard here

Fred Fuchs... I love how on IMDB, in the trivia section, the first thing is "His surname is pronounced "F-you-ks"." Just for don't even accidentally call him fucks.

[@dorkfish1275]

F YOU XD

Fyouk you XD

[@scottmccurdy6493]

11:18 Careful, that's how we got into this whole Coronavirus mess...

[@cobalt7248]

Lol

[@stickfigureblue123]

3:05 why do I find this funny?

[@NolanIsAweosme]

love the fact that the nerd is wearing the air pumps while stomping the bat

[@nicolhaidi]

5:03 MAAAN, I won't let you poison me! SO I THREW IT ON THE GROOOOOUND!

[@Mocky01]

Thought the same :D

[@THERE.IS.NO.DEATH.]

at that time of 5:03 it has nothing to do with poison and it has nothing to do with throwing anything on the ground...do you ever have anything relevant to say? or do you always comment pure bullshit?

[@Awalys]

There is no death. It's a reference to a song.

[@THERE.IS.NO.DEATH.]

Prince Serenity Yeah I've heard that horrible song before...what does this video have to do with the song? If you answered, "nothing" then you are correct.

[@realmofthemisunderstood166]

0Dahaka probably both

[@macaryl95]

IT'S FRONKEN-STEEN. I can't handle all the bat abuse. :(

[@nelsonmuntz9317]

"UH im sick of it all, Morning Sun Vanquish me" lol

[@Elias___]

I miss this dude. Nothing is better after along stressful day to just tune out and watch nostalgic avgn

[@JoaoLucasK]

"Don't know how to FUCK something" I fucking lost it at this part

[@darthsidious8926]

theres something so classic and great watching james old videos.

[@gSlover4reel]

True that. He rarely reviews video games anymore, and when he does that old manic fun anger and obscenity is really toned down

[@armoredvistitor2197]

feels like james had alot of fun with this episode, spouting the most universal horror dialogue ever