Dumper Guilt Stages (Podcast 384)

[@vincentbos]

'GET YOUR EX BACK' Advice & Support www.dateme.tips/

[@casket8530]

If youre reading this, grieve the loss as if they have died and not coming back. Focus on self improvement and You’ll be better in due time

[@GOLTEB]

I just cant imagine getting back to an ex after knowing her being intimate with another guy after me, rebound no go

[@BamBam-un5pz]

I agree. Couldn’t go back to him at all if he’s dipped his nib elsewhere. No chance

[@XRP-Mill]

Tainted I agree….

[@mmosley8492]

Check your ego, she wasn't a virgin when you met her. And if they meant that much and you don't want her with another guy. Marry her

[@charlesizuchukwu5735]

@@mmosley8492 you are a fool, even if you get married she can still sleep with other people and dump him lol it’s called divorce!!

[@gelgoorx]

My ex started looking at me with a look she hadn't given me since we started dating I smile and I'm polite as can be when I see her at our children exchange, it's interesting seeing her find me attractive because honestly I've done everything right and I'm really feeling myself 🔥💯

[@jabbzcross2880]

You are amazing sir,my ex reached out and experienced everything you said in your prior videos

[@thabo844]

We were together for almost 3 years, had a child and were living together. She decided to leave me and go back home when I was at my lowest and provided everything she needed without hesitation. Today marks one and a half months since she left and she already has a man. Yesterdays she "mistakingly" sent me a picture of her new lover with her, and said she meant to send my daughter's picture. The picture was a full nude of both of them, most likely after the deed. I'm still trying to recover, somehow these podcasts are helping me. Thank you, Vince!

[@vincentbos]

Hi Bliss, thank you for your comment and kind words. I'm so sorry to hear about what you are going through. You will get through this bleak tunnel and into the light of happiness. Keep moving forwrad.

[@kungfukenny1540]

That’s fucked up

[@malcolmhamilton8706]

Damn bro

[@empressCharnia]

Thats rough

[@ZeCostas]

Jeez, that was no mistake. Honestly if it were me I’d block her out of my life forever after that one

[@seanking6184]

My ex basically confessed “feelings” for someone she knew and about 2 weeks later she was dating said person - after maybe 2 months of knowing them… Our relationship was 5 years long and was my best friend - surely a rebound?

[@cameroncrossley2312]

same boat here man, any update?

[@haffls]

Yeah, any updates?

[@MrIlleism]

If someone develops feelings that easy for people they have issues

[@gonzoguy-ra]

Limerence

[@districtagenda5695]

8 months since breakup, 3 months in got a long text apologizing for ending things bad, now she just called me 3 times Saturday night. Texted her back 4 days later asking if everything was okay. Thoughts??

[@districtagenda5695]

No response when I texted her

[@vincentbos]

Hi John, thanks for your question. If I remember right your ex is in a new relationship? If that's the case, then her feelings are clearly mixed between her current relationship and yourself. You waited 4 days to text her back, and by that time her mindset had changed again. This pattern is likely to continue whilst her situation remains the same. If you feel your mental health is suffering, then you might need to consider asking her only to contact you if she becomes single again.

[@districtagenda5695]

@@vincentbos I don’t think she’s in a relationship anymore if she’s calling me up in the middle of the night, maybe they had a fight and made up tho I wouldn’t know. Still good to know as soon as things went south for a second that she called me.

[@ConfidencePT]

I'm now 7-months (October 8 2021) post break-up (her choice). I got an apology 2-months after the breakup. But then she tried to friend zone me. I did 3-months No Contact. She reached out, we met up and spent the weekend together Easter weekend just gone (slept in her bed, but there wasn't any intimacy). She then basically ghosted me for a week. I then reached out last Saturday with an email and called her out on her crappy behaviour. She replied to my email saying that we were off to a good start when we met up. Now, nothing for 5-dqys. I'm not sure whether to reach out again after a week? It just feels to me that she's flakey.

[@ConfidencePT]

@@vincentbos Your advice has helped me so far to re-engage contact with my ex-girlfriend. I'll be sure to buy you a coffee! Coaching us difficult because I'm in Australia and out of work due to COVID and the exchange rate makes it atleast 1.5-2x more. I'm now 7-months (October 8 2021) post break-up (her choice). I got an apology 2-months after the breakup. But then she tried to friend zone me. I did 3-months No Contact. She reached out, we met up and spent the weekend together Easter weekend just gone (slept in her bed, but there wasn't any intimacy). She then basically ghosted me for a week. I then reached out last Saturday with an email and called her out on her crappy behaviour. She replied to my email saying that we were off to a good start when we met up. Now, nothing for 5-dqys. I'm not sure whether to reach out again after a week? It just feels to me that she's flakey.

[@courtmetrage]

Should a dumpee take their dumper back after knowing they went through an excess stage? Ain't that betrayal in itself?

[@casket8530]

Never take them back. You’ll never forget or forgive what they did. No matter how much they beg you back, let them burn in their hell.

[@markom180]

If a dumper is orbiting me for a year now, watching everything I post, what should I do to make him contact me?

[@vincentbos]

Nothing is certain to work, but your best chance is to focus on the content you upload. Your ex is watching everything you post, so use that as a way to generate intrigue.

[@ericlee419]

move on with your life

[@TheOnemanr1ot]

Seems my ex is seeing a new guy completely opposite of me 3 months after a break up. We were together for 2.5 years! I’m not over here you think this is a rebound?

[@xMikeyHardyx]

My ex is also in a rebound after exactly 3 months. Personally, I don’t think it’s enough time to grieve, move on AND develop attraction for a new person. I’ve never done it 😅

[@vincentbos]

Hi Oneman, thank you for your question. Everything you describe sounds very much like your ex could be in a rebound relationship. The important thing is that you focus on your own journey moving forward.

[@TheOnemanr1ot]

@@vincentbos your videos bring me Comfort. Thanks man, keep it up

[@RainMaker0602]

Wow, March seems like a month for rebounds. My ex and I broke up last first week of January, and we've been together for a year and three months. We split because she confessed to cheating. So, yeah it hard this past January, but I fought back and worked on my rebuild and growth. In February, I was pushed by my friends to try online dating; so I gave it a shot since it was harmless. The weird bit was that I found that same ex on the dating app; since my assumption was that she was still with the dude she cheated with. So yeah, I shrugged it off. She contacted me on the February, and she sounded pissed; but I kept my cool and just let it slide since it felt like an emotional outlet and such. This past March, I was told by my friends that she was seeing someone and kinda making it public. Though we're still friends on Facebook (she unfollowed me on Instagram and Twitter), I didn't bother to check it ever since we broke up. So yeah, I'm guessing that it's a rebound or something. And knowing my ex now from the outside and from the introspection and personal growth I have made in the past few months, I hope the dude knows what he got into. I confess though, I am seeing (and kinda dating) someone, and it does feel like it is in that time window of a rebound relationship. But I have been open, honest, and direct with this person and she's sticking with us spending time together. She knows the story, and I try not to rush things and avoid making it feel like a rebound. But yeah, am just sharing. And don't worry, man. You're gonna be fine.

[@vincentbos]

@@TheOnemanr1ot thank you very much :)

[@mountaingoat1982]

I haven’t spoken with my ex gf since the end of January when she told me to move on and to stop wasting my time messaging her. She paid me out the mortgage for the apartment we bought together. I 💯 do not believe she will ever reach out again or want to get back together with me, she said she was never attracted to me anyway!! I’ve done as she said and not contacted her at all. I still don’t feel good and very low at times.

[@vincentbos]

Hi Mountain, thank you for your comment. You have gone through an incredibly tough time and feel like you are in a bleak tunnel. If you keep moving forward, you will see the light and get out the tunnel. Take one day at a time, one step at a time and you will find happiness again. Please remember to keep talking to your friends and family and speak with a local doctor if you feel depressed.

[@mountaingoat1982]

@@vincentbos thank you Vincent. I was also made redundant recently as well, so have had a really hard time. I have found a new job but I am not really enjoying it! Do remain in no contact or reach out in the future? I’ve seen her twice since I haven’t text, once jogging in local park and the other time in the supermarket.

[@vincentbos]

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Try to focus on positive things from now on. If you have been dumped, I suggest you never contact your ex again, unless they contact you first. If you 'bump into her', then be respectful, smile and say hello. Then carry on with the rest of your day. Don't go out of your way to speak with her, but if you have to interact, then be positive and not awkward.

[@aishahassan1912]

Me too...He dumped me and he's in a new relationship 😢😢😢😢get a hug from me💞

[@vincentbos]

You will find happiness again Aisha. Keep moving forward.

[@mysterio5837]

Yeah my ex is trash. Low life belonging in the streets, nope don't want that

[@udochimoemeka2712]

Thanks. You were so helpful

[@vincentbos]

You're welcome!

[@PriyankaSingh-go5hd]

Mine was 5 months. Will he contact

[@5RRIY20044]

She’s letting her friends stalking my stories if I’m going outside with someone she see my stories

[@mmosley8492]

Yesh they feel guilty after that rebound didn't work out

[@NouLachenZeg]

I thought guilt was never a genuine incentive for the dumper to change their mind? Only attraction level, no?

[@vincentbos]

I believe that the more romantic, emotional attraction someone feels, the more guilt they could start to feel.

[@SirSensitivity]

3. Almost 10 months. I hate that I'm going to contact her but just letting her know I'll be in her country so it's no shock

[@SirSensitivity]

@@Redouku believe it or not it isn't. was suggested by a relationship coach, pretty good 1. it is my closure. things have happened spiritually that wont be understood. the way for me to move on is my way of closure. After 10 months was no plan to go. Just 3 weeks ago it felt spiritually strong to go. im following the rules and good with it but the powers the be surprised me .Lots to explain but no excuse

[@SirSensitivity]

@@Redouku Guilty b4 innocent isn't good either. Try to take a person at their word. Shock is better a month b4 than bumping into especially with high anxiety. This was talked about. I didn't just wake up and say I want to call her. Thank you for your energy

[@sliceinher]

@@SirSensitivity how did it go?

[@SirSensitivity]

@@sliceinher well I haven't gone yet I will go on my birthday next week. I texted and emailed her after I got the tickets. I imagine she changed her phone number because she responded email 2 Days later. I told her I wanted to let her know that I will be in Denmark and I wanted her to hear it from me. Two days later she said that must mean I am doing well if I am able to travel she hopes I have a good time coming there. I saw the response in two different ways but don't want to speak on it right now. This is also after we broke up and I said I was coming there I have never seen her act like that she had lost her mind it haunts me to this day and saying that I don't respect her. That will be the only contact that I will do is the email. You have to remind me if you want to hear what happened after Denmark

[@kungfukenny1540]

@@SirSensitivity update

[@RhinoRun300]

She's stubborn but in the reflection stage...

[@grant2149]

New sub👍

[@vincentbos]

Thank you Grant. How are you feeling today?

[@grant2149]

@@vincentbos Im doing good today some days better then other. Thanx. 👍🙏

[@vincentbos]

@@grant2149 hopefully my channel can help support you towards a happier future. Stay positive and keep moving forward :)

[@ellaesmeralda9360]

I went through guilt at first. But I never went back to him. Women are built differently perhaps?

[@vincentbos]

Hi Ella, thanks for your comment. Every situation is unique and my podcasts have to be somewhat generalised based on research, but nothing is always the same / works / fails 100% of the time. What is your current situation? How are you feeling right now?

[@MimMdance]

He was probably just a toy to you. Women see guys as comodities, constantly changing from one to another when something isn't perfect, instead of working on things together.

[@xMikeyHardyx]

First?

[@vincentbos]

Yes!!! Anthony!!! You Are Today's Champion!!!

[@xMikeyHardyx]

@@vincentbos Finally 😅 2 things. 1. The community you’re building here is a pure one. There’s no cash grab or exploit. It’s pure. Evidence to prove this is me and Jann actually became friends and started talking about random stuff, even with a 7 hour difference 🤣 2. As good intentions of getting your ex back your content is. I think it’s fair to treat them more so as personal development too! Recently my ex has a new budding relationship. Facebook official and everything. Sometimes you need that final slap in the face to finally dust your hands off and walk away. Your content I see differently now. It’s no longer ‘get an ex back’. It’s more ‘be thankful you dodged a bullet and develop yourself, learn from it’. Thank you Vincent. Thank you Jann. 💜

[@vincentbos]

Wow! Thank you so much Anthony for your kind words! My aim is to try and help people find a happier future. Sometimes, that might be getting their ex back, but sometimes that might be finding someone even better. I don't like to see myself as a 'Get Your Ex Back' coach, because: 1) There is no 100% guaranteed way to get an ex back. 2) Sometimes getting your ex back isn't the best aim to have. I promote self-improvement and self-awareness. Becoming the best version of yourself and attracting more people into your life. For me, success is happiness. It doesn't matter if it's with your ex or someone new.

[@xMikeyHardyx]

@@vincentbos and that good sir is what we can all strive to achieve this year after covid. Success and happiness in whatever form it brings us. Thank you again, Vincent.

[@vincentbos]

Thank you Anthony, for sharing those wise words.

[@ConfidencePT]

@VincentBoss Your advice has helped me so far to re-engage contact with my ex-girlfriend. I'll be sure to buy you a coffee! Coaching us difficult because I'm in Australia and out of work due to COVID and the exchange rate makes it atleast 1.5-2x more. I'm now 7-months (October 8 2021) post break-up (her choice). I got an apology 2-months after the breakup. But then she tried to friend zone me. I did 3-months No Contact. She reached out, we met up and spent the weekend together Easter weekend just gone (slept in her bed, but there wasn't any intimacy). She then basically ghosted me for a week. I then reached out last Saturday with an email and called her out on her crappy behaviour. She replied to my email saying that we were off to a good start when we met up. Now, nothing for 5-dqys. I'm not sure whether to reach out again after a week? It just feels to me that she's flakey.

[@isaacacosta4496]

If ive told myself anything thay sticks during my grieving/healing stage i definitely find myself walking a little taller with each day but came to a cinclusion i think isnt clouded by my heart broken feelings but more coming from me getting back my self respect remembering my worth and all that good stuff. "This is all her doing and this is what she wanted. And now and days its like with everyday she decides to keep her shit up. The more i honestly just dont give a damn anymore. And shes running if notnalready ran out of any part of me having any bitnof respect or attractiveness toward her. " it feels unbelievable to think id feelnthis was one day. But its not hard at all to see ive always deserved so much better but love kept me stupifnand blind even when we broke up i would still try everythjng to make it work out. 8 years together. Already had someone waiting when she left. And ummm i dont know what the hell has came over me wantin that shit at all. Im a bad motherfucker through and through. Ive not made an effort to see other women because infeel healing 100% on my own id the best way to grow from who i was to who i am now. Fuck her dumb shit. She still believes she has me wraoped around her finger andnit makes her feel goodnin an evil way lol so itd judt funny to know she thinks that when im not even trying her anymore. I just hope if she ever does decided to do this again,, that im fully over her in everyway where ill be so sure the old me has fully died away. Cause i never needed that shit in the first place. I don't know what's ahead for me but incan be sure that I wont stop doing it for me from now on. She really had me all fucked up. Pathetic piece of trash i was so stupid to hold on to while getting had then entire time