Dwarven Justice (mace-to-face)

[@abrilcasabene3605]

I tend to keep my artifacts in a locked room to prevent this from happening It's always the ghouls or the necromancers lol

[@soothingsloth]

Yea I’ve since moved all of them to displays in my count’s quarters. At least I can keep a better eye on them there.

[@conflictt3224]

@@soothingsloth get a friendly undead dwarf or other immortal and lock them in an observation room with glass windows so they can see the artifacts 24/7, they'll report thefts and witness who dunit usually.

[@soothingsloth]

@@conflictt3224 this is a high IQ strategy.

[@potatoboy6094]

dorf fort is a gem

[@soothingsloth]

Your profile pick is a gem. Great show.

[@QuentinoGiangrande]

Every good dorf knows that holding and settling grudges is an effective form of trauma therapy

[@willphoenix5464]

I recall one time that I had an unhappy dwarf caught stealing a very valuable artofact silver mace. Problem is, he was my only legendary stone crafter so I was reluctant to kill him with my army and hadn't prepared a dungeon. So I was looking at him while quickly getting a cage ready. All my cages were filled with goblins or camels, and while I was trying to place an empty one the dwarf handed over the artifact to a human and escaped. The hammerer simply beat the teeth out of the dwarf as a sentence because building a dungeon had taken way too long. I simply confined him underground to make crafts for eternity until he was killed by goblins. Like a week later, the human came back _with_ the artifact, the dumbass. I killed him and recovered the mace, only to realise that _my dwarves hadn't made that mace_ and I must have stolen it from a dead monster hunter and forgot about it; and the thief was probably related to the original owner. Finder keepers thieving longlegs

[@soothingsloth]

Honestly, I'm gonna to to ensure my police force isn't full of elite mace dwarves. Anytime, they try to make an arrest the suspect never survives. It's even worse when my hammerer (also a hammer lord) get's to dish out the punishments. Basic punishments lead to horrible disabilities for my dwarfs.

[@willphoenix5464]

@@soothingsloth I remember someone making a trick by equipping the police force with training weapons; aka the equivalent of wooden batons My hammerer used a shield he had... for some reason

[@soothingsloth]

@@willphoenix5464 not a bad idea. I was thinking I might just train a squad of wrestlers, but I think that a legendary wrestler still has the ability to absolutely decimate a dwarf.

[@gigaslave]

A fancy display cage made out of platinum bars keeps thieving sticky fingers from my dorf's art projects.

[@soothingsloth]

Despite all my rage, I’m still just a gnome in a platinum cage.

[@galacsinhajto]

Beatings are considered a lesser sentence than imprisonment in DF. Of course , if you don't have a prison setup , the punishment for a serious offense also gets "lowered" to a beating. Unfortunately, if you don't choose your hammerer carefully or forget to forbid them carring around that masterwork battle axe ,a dwarf receiving this lesser punishment will just be maimed or killed. Victims of travel brawls and the ensuing vandalism might feel disappointed, if they feel the criminal got off too easily, even if they are currently knee-deep in gore because the delinquent's head got exploded after the first hit.

[@satch5471]

This is why i place my artifacts behind gem windows

[@soothingsloth]

Dwarf fortress is a live and learn experience.

[@orange0666]

Undead ghouls are a menace man. Straight up snapped one of my hammerdwarves’ neck that one time.

[@Vlamyncksken]

Imo engraving spam looks horrendous

[@soothingsloth]

Sorry dad.

[@Vlamyncksken]

@soothingsloth lol it's okay

[@khlorghaal]

the wii music lmfao

[@aquarius5264]

Take me to church I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies I'll tell you my sins, and you can sharpen your knife Offer me that deathless death Oh, good God, let me give you my life Take me to church I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies I'll tell you my sins, and you can sharpen your knife Offer me that deathless death Oh, good God, let me give you my life

[@RafaelBrum]

please more?

[@soothingsloth]

Some fresh content should be coming off the press soon. Started a new fort last night.