How I Deal with Chronic Pain - Build A Ladder

[@emmymade]

You are a force. I appreciate your vulnerability, it's inspiring.🙏

[@eatyourkimchi]

+emmymadeinjapan you’re amazing and make great videos :)

[@HeyItsZee_]

emmymadeinjapan ahh emmy i didnt know you watch Simon and martina

[@KayKayNicoleSkyes]

I didn't know you watched Simon and Martina.

[@XxStonedKillerxX]

I too didnt know you watched Simon and Martina.

[@mirandamaria]

can we also just take a second to appreciate how amazing Simon is with Martina and how he is a solid rock next to her when she needs it. what a wonderful partner he is for her. no wonder, Martina is so lovely.

[@eatyourkimchi]

This is a tough video, but Martina is going to show you how she perseveres when her chronic pain gets overwhelming.

[@samyahafsaoui6458]

Hopefully this will help so many people suffering

[@retnofitriana8184]

I'm still crying, even after this video ends. Stay strong, Martina ~ Lots of love for you 💕💕💕

[@cafezo87934]

feel better soon martina! 🙋🙌🙆🙏💪

[@heopie]

You guys, the both of you are so incredibly strong. Hold on dears. I only can hope that soon there are treatments that will make the pain go away. Big hugs.

[@DRAGONFANG18]

Thanks for being an inspiration guys!

[@anh_truong]

I think it's incredible to see the emotional transition throughout the day as Martina continues to make small decisions. That's such a heartwarming part of this video - to see that she can wake up feeling absolutely gone, but as she controls what makes her happy, she too starts to feel better. Her voice is higher, her eyes sparkle. Martina, you are the epitome of hard work, in the mind and on the body.

[@angelika9729]

My son has EDS. He is 21 an sick for 10 Years now. He feels like you do. Thank you for sharing your day. He has a good Doctor, who relocates his spine, arms, feet, fingers etc. So he has less hurts and his spine is straight now after ten years of mild Chiropractic-Ostheopathie-Dorntherapie-Mix. If his shoulder dislocates, he relocates it or goes to hospital. If you dont do that, it hurts more and more. After 4 sabbat- years, his chronical fatigue is gone and he is happier. But he can not go to school or work. I wish you the best and that you find somebody, that can help you. Stay strong... 🤗😘

[@eatyourkimchi]

Also, NOTIFICATION SQUAD! We usually say something happy here, but this is kind of a sad video. I just wanted to say sorry if this gets you down. We'll get back to more fun videos soon. We've got a bunch filmed!

[@tiilrococo]

Simon and Martina no apologies beauty. Love you both so much! Lots of love!!!!

[@eriscooper5143]

Simon and Martina We'll always be here to support you guys! You can do it Martina! #BuildALadder 💪💪💪 We love you!

[@deetravelgirl]

Simon and Martina hugssssss

[@irenem7410]

Thank you so much for sharing this!

[@roboticshaft1340]

Simon and Martina We can't always be fun and happy. We understand.

[@beebop1402]

Martina you have no idea how much these videos mean to me. I suffer from Chronic Reoccurring Multifocal Osteomyelitis. I'm 15 and I'm in such a hard time right now with my mental and physical health. You are such a role model for me. Seeing your videos make me feel like I can get over anything my life throws at me. Stay strong Martina

[@eatyourkimchi]

I just remembered to check our translations, and I realized that many of you have submitted subtitles in a lot of different languages. Thank you for helping, everyone. Subtitling isn't fun, i know. I really appreciate the effort. Thank you :D

[@Soyachan]

I actually like making subtitles. Also, it's a little something I can give back to you guys.

[@stree55]

Hi Martina. Great video. I don't login to youtube much but I wanted to say that I have met quite a few patients with EDS and I would recommend visiting a good rheumatologist who can help. Losing weight and shifting your diet over to a healthier one with less meat and more veggies such as a vegan diet has also shown to be quite helpful in controlling inflammation and pain. I know you and Simon are foodies, but having a healthier diet is definitely something to take into great consideration.

[@marinapedrinha7946]

As I was watching I was thinking "I've got to put in portuguese subs, this is such an important video" and i was so happily surprised when I saw that someone already did! Thank you Simon and Martina for making the video and huge obrigada pro lindo(a) que legendou!!! Ficou lindo, aliás.

[@Soyachan]

Jennifer Tran Cannabis is absolutely illegal in Japan.

[@SaRaZuL42]

My mom suffers from chronic pain because of a fracture in her spine and multiple really bad achieved surgerys. She does not understand english, that is why I expend the afternoon subtitling your beautiful video. I hope it can help her. A bad day to her it's a bad day for the whole family so we always try to cheer her up with bad jokes (she is the QUEEN of bad jokes), ugly dancing and funny TV shows. Also we play a lot of board games that make us concentrate and friendly fight with eachother. For us Distraction is the key to build our big family size ladder.

[@d0ul0v3me]

I watch this whenever I feel down about my pain. I think if Martina can do it, get up and get out of bed, I can do it.

[@eatyourkimchi]

And I think the same about the members of my community :) you can do it, so I do it too 🔨

[@beachiekeeeen]

This is how I feel! We’re all stronger together!

[@sakuraneko9972]

My five year old said you are a beautiful lady. She loves your cat. Hope you feel better! I suffer with depression so I go to gym, color or draw, put make up on. Talk to my grandpa.

[@321okaygo8]

"Good morning, my love". What a special couple. I've watched your videos for years, and appreciate that you've decided to share your experience with us. Hoping the best for you both.

[@Maxbroforce]

I didn't want to get out of bed today. But literally as I was laying there checking my phone I saw your video come up and I watched it all. I got out of bed, I went to work, I even made it to the pharmacy to buy more medicine. Thank you for sharing how you build your ladder. I hate seeing how much pain you're in, but knowing that you still get up and build your ladder even when you want to do anything but makes me feel like I can do that too. Sending you and Simon all my best

[@Natalieogriffin]

I'm only 1:20 in. I started sobbing. I have an unidentified auto immune and couldn't even pull weeds in my flower bed today. One year ago, I was training for my third half marathon and yanking overgrown bushes out of the ground by myself. Powering through anything. And now I can't even hang a wind chime successfully. It's been a hard day. Hard year... I've watched your videos silently since you all first started. But I missed this one. I think it was meant to be saved for now. Thank you for being so open about what's going on with you, Martina. I appreciate it so much, and hope I can help others get through this stuff someday as well. Now I will finish watching the video. Thank you, guys.

[@Truerealism747]

Has it been diagnosed

[@indigothecat]

The fact that you and your husband both got degrees and emigrated to Korea and Japan and made a successful KZbin channel and web-site speaks volumes about overcoming your disability. You are an amazing woman and a great couple. :) I hope that someday maybe there is a better treatment or cure for you, but until then I wish you both the best. Estoy enviandote buenas vibras!

[@viper4045]

I didn't believe superheroes existed before I heard Martina's story. She's truly a real life superhero.

[@Nonameyourmama]

So what about Cancer survivors ? They're not superheroes

[@3Hellokittykitty]

I wonder if Simon was crying filming this :(

[@emppos432]

One thing tho, this makes me so much more comfortable. Because this is life, and every day is important... We gotta love what we have and go through hard times to pay the time we spent here...

[@pamelasmith2625]

Loved your video. I have severe fibromyalgia. I agree that we need to get out as much as possible. My mornings are horrendous. I just feel like curling up in a ball and not leaving the house, but I force myself to go out. Even if it is to a grocery store. I use the cart to help me walk around and walk up and down the aisles to give me some exercise. Then I chat with the cashier or a customer. A few days ago my friend and I went out for lunch. We had a short walk to the restaurant. She has bad arthritis in her knees. She was hobbling with her came, and I was struggling with my walker, but it was so worth it. We had so much fun and such a lovely meal. We even forgot about our pain for a short time. Pain is a very lonely and disabling illness. Trying g to stay positive and not get too depressed is very important. I hope you are having a good today. Hugs ❤️🇨🇦❤️🇨🇦

[@stef4535]

Seeing Martina like this makes me cry so hard but she is so strong and beautiful. She always pulls through and tries to hide her pain but her showing everyone this video is so inspiring!!! (PS. Simon is such an amazing support!!!)

[@lookitmychicken]

My teenager has an undiagnosed (as yet) chronic illness and has been feeling pretty sad lately about not going out of the house. Today I got home and found out that the kid watched this video and is feeling inspired to get out of the house every day, has gone over to their Dad's house and is determined to build their own ladder. I am so thankful to you guys. xx

[@GJ-pj4mj]

Verylisa fatigue? New century sickness. Pretty common (I have it)

[@graceviggiano1171]

Check out POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome)!! I was just diagnosed after two years of barely going to school and staying in bed all day. I know how frustrating it is to know that something is wrong but not knowing how to fix it! Hope this helps!

[@lookitmychicken]

Hi Grace -- that's my kid's most likely diagnosis. We have a referral to a POTS/dysautonomia specialist but the first appointment's not until next month. Good luck with managing your POTS. xx

[@lookitmychicken]

Hi Gabriela. Are you referring to chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS)? I know other people who have it and it's on the radar for my kid but it's so hard to diagnose. :( I hope you are doing okay.

[@consciouscommunity3897]

Everyone has bad days, Martina has physical pain & sometimes we have mental pain. She didn't say it but, gratitude is a big part of her day. Fill your life with things and people that make you happy. Martina made this video out of the strength she has from the beauty of her life. She made it because she loves us & her ducky and her stunkies;) & herself. Life is seriously too short to not enjoy it. Simone and Martina are a wonderful example of follow your dreams. They inspire us everyday. Sometimes I watch Open the Hsppy when I'm having a bad day. That Spudgy voice makes me laugh every time, the bows video is one of my favorite memories of all time. Build a ladder, care for yourself in a loving and kind way. Don't put yourself down and live in the things you can't do. Celebrate the things you can do. Love to our sweet couple who inspire us everyday!

[@smyerskelley]

I have rewatched this video so many times. Sent it to so many friends who have mental and/or physical pain. What a great resource. Please never take this down

[@lucygrayson6034]

I don't see this as sad. I see this as a woman with strength and hope!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@lorenax17]

It’s 0.07 seconds in and my eyes are already teary. Must be bc having following them for years you know the struggle she faces daily. And now she’s actually going to show it and I find her so incredibly strong. And now I’m crying and haven’t even started the video >.

[@KayTayYay15]

lorenax17 Same here. And watching the progression from where they started to now and how Martina's condition has progressed also makes me sad. But the way Simon is always there is amazing.

[@lorenax17]

Katherine Smith I agree! His support for her makes this relationship pure goals. :)

[@blackstar008]

Simon is my role model in helping my partner build his ladder.

[@debbieebbiebobebbie]

Every time I need to rewatch this video, I’m going to thank you, Martina. Thank you. And thank you Simon for being an awesomely supportive spouse, this is so hard, you’re saving her life every day. Seeing y’all working together gives me hope. XOXOX

[@debbieebbiebobebbie]

Thanks y’all, you keep saving me xoxox (I need a pig and a pig hat, STAT!)

[@Jennifr1966]

@Sue W I wonder if he feels like he's failing you, because even though i've dealt with chronic pain longer than my husband has, he is in terrible shape, and I often avoid him. I feel my being around him makes him worse, so I build a wall. If you can, ask your husband how he feels when for going through the worst days, and if he feels overwhelmed by it all.

[@debbieebbiebobebbie]

I got a huggy pig and I just got a pig hat... Thank you. Martina xoxo #BuildALadder

[@bella3829]

@@debbieebbiebobebbie can you share the link to the pig hat? 🐷

[@lindatait5326]

My God, Simon could not love you more! To hear the emotion in his voice is to know he will love you forever. Love and strength to you both xxxx

[@TrinaMadeIt]

I thought this too. If they love, cherish and support you on the bad days then they are keepers!!

[@elenamei413]

It’s so sad that an amazing strong woman like Martina has to go through this

[@notspigot]

living (emphasis on "living") with a serious illness is what makes people strong.

[@stoprainlty]

I started bawling the moment Martina came out of her bedroom. I love you both so much. Sending many hugs and kisses to you both xoxo

[@Rose_from_UK]

I didn’t want to watch this, because it’s hard to face my issues sometimes. I’m glad I did. I have EDS HYPERMOBILITY syndrome and rheumatoid arthritis. I’m often in chronic pain and deal with a lot of shame about the fact I am overweight, I have to say it’s a bit chicken and egg the issue though, I want to lose weight but can’t exercise, but if I lose weight exercise would be more probable. I hate when people say “how are you?” How do I answer that? I hate when people didn’t know me before, when I was a lively, beautiful life and soul of the party. I am more than just my illness, but it is all consuming. Thank you for spreading awareness and making me feel less alone and less lonely. I wish I had a duckie, but I do have two wonderful understanding 15 year old boys, so I am very lucky, them not so much. X Rose

[@acraia7256]

Milkymoles. Ohh I can so relate to the shame of being overweight due to serious and painful conditions. Being overweight or not being able to move also makes the pain worse, atleast that's how I feel. Or maybe it is just the mental pain affecting your body too, who knows. I think being overweight is just another symptom, and the real shame is that people don't understand that.

[@kelseywoodie3012]

I also have a hard time losing weight. It's hard for me to exercise because I have type 1 diabetes and if I overdo exercise, I might have a low and undo all the good I just did for myself by having to eat something high in sugar. Also, insulin in the form that type 1 diabetics have to use causes us to hold onto fat more so than someone with a normal functioning pancreas. I know it's not a chronic pain thing, but the mental part can be somewhat similar and I do have depression on top of it. I never thought about #BuildALadder until Martina talked about it, but I'm considering finding myself a visual representation of it to help me take care of myself.

[@nikki10114]

Milkymoles. I feel this

[@xxarochonxx]

Milkymoles. I also relate to how all-consuming Chronic Intractable Pain illnesses can be. I completely lost everything; my career came crashing down in a very grand, public, humiliating fall from grace; my identity; my worth. I was a 120# 5'5" L&D/Pediatrics Nurse, Firefighter, Vol. Paramedic, black belt, equestrian, 4-H leader, H.S. Volleyball team mom... I was a dynamo. People who say that Fibromyalgia patient's are just looking for attention; are malingerers; just need to lose weight & get a life are full of schitt. I have been very happily married to the Love of my life since I was 18. I was living my best life, working my dream job, with an absurdly well-behaved teenage Daughter. Until I got sick & the pain left me bed-ridden for over 2.5 years. Being unable to move, & b/c of the many medications I was on, I put on weight & topped out at 265 pounds. From 120 # to 265# in under 18 months. All of that was a symptom of my illness & a result of my pain & medication. None of it was selfish, attention-seeking, embellishments of my pain & symptoms. And it's asinine for anyone to say otherwise. It's an embarrassing, humiliating, painful situation to be in such an uncomfortable, overweight body condition. I felt terribly ashamed for my Husband & Daughter to have to be seen with me, or to have to acknowledge my relationship to them. I was bed-ridden due to the horrific pain, so I didn't leave home often, but when I did, if I saw someone we knew, or my Husband or Daughter ran into people they knew, I'd try to sneak away & hide so they wouldn't have to admit knowing me & be forced to introduce me to anyone. I felt terrible for them. Finally I found a good Pain Management Dr. who quite literally saved my life, found a good pain medication for me, & gave me enough pain relief that I once again have some semblance of decent quality of life. And b/c I can walk again, I have lost 75 pounds. It's not great; it's not where I WANT to be, but it's a start. Most important, I don't feel as absolutely unworthy of love anymore. My Husband has always been amazing through this, & It's a huge gift to be able enjoy going out for a dinner-date together, or walking the Dog together. One thing I know is that I could not have gotten through this without my amazing, wonderful Husband of 27 years. It's hard enough to get through this WITH a wonderful, supportive, loving, understanding Husband; I can't imagine going through this alone, but I'd rather be alone than with a partner who not only wasn't supportive, but was actually demeaning, insulting, & hostile. I don't know how so many women live through so much physical AND emotional pain; may God bless their souls. Sorry- Please forgive me. I didn't mean to digress. I always could talk the ears off a mule, but I'm much more of a talker (writer) now that I don't engage in any other meaningful conversations, except for those with my patient, precious Husband. Much respect & admiration, & much love & best wishes to you~ ❤

[@teambeining]

No shame girl! You can’t hold yourself to the same standard as someone who is healthy and able.

[@AzhaliDraven]

You are so brave to publish this. Thanks for all, Martina 💖✨ You are really strong!!

[@chocolate1bluebird]

Not gonna lie, I started crying within the first three seconds of this video. This video helps me feel extremely inspired, even though I’m not living with an illness or chronic pain. It puts everything in perspective and makes everything seem more achievable, since i’m not the only trying to work through things. I’m not alone. Lately, I’ve had goals that I want to achieve, but my anxiety, depression, and fear has been holding me back. I know it won’t be easy and will take time, but I have this video when I need a helpful push. #buildaladder God i’m teary, thank you.

[@kahlil.alcala]

Lee Hanel Same! Tears just stared pouring from my eyes as soon Martina started talking

[@heyakirsty]

As much as it broke my heart, I really needed to see this. As I suffer from depression which stemmed from my arthritis I can fully understand your pain. Seeing this video has really helped changed my perspective and I'm going to start looking at/doing things with a more positive outlook. So now I'm going to go out and go for a walk down the canal near my house and look at beautiful nature. Keep going, Martina, we all love you!

[@airihan]

Hey Martina, I know this is an old video, but....I always come back to this video to help me start the ladder. So you'll be proud to hear....I got out of bed and took my first steps outside

[@youhavemyshares6040]

We all love you Martina!

[@youhavemyshares6040]

#buildaladder

[@sophiafrost3786]

I applaud Martina. This took guts to put on the internet. Im on the city bus crying my eyes out

[@humbleone6405]

sophia frost yes it does. She had a great attitude

[@Marjol]

Thank you both for sharing this. Many tips you gave are also very helpfull for depression. Also this video helped me understand my friends who have chronic pain even better. You are a bad-ass!

[@bombsfadeaway]

Nearly 3 years later and this video still speaks to me. I watch it on hard body pain days and it inspires me to at least try taking the first step. Thank you Martina for sharing your journey, you have no idea how much it helps even years later.

[@slutforsana]

Same here ♡ Martina is such an inspiration for ppl that struggle with chronic mental or physical pain

[@GeorgiaGeorgette]

I have EDS too. Searching for videos about the condition was how I first found this channel. In the past, I was housebound at best, bedbound at worst. It became so unbearable that I contacted an assisted suicide facility. Sometimes I couldn't walk, sometimes I couldn't stand, sometimes I couldn't sit. There were days I couldn't even talk. I wasn't just ready to give up; I already had. Martina, your last EDS video filled me with such hope and positivity that I still consider it the first rung of my own ladder. My health spontaneously improved, but if it hadn't been for your inspiration, I may never have tried to see what I was capable of. I could have stayed in that dark dark place, in that pit, if you hadn't helped me to heal. Now, I can go outside again. You were my pig hat. I will always be grateful to you and Simon 💓

[@kellywimer1042]

NotMostGirls prayers to you! Thank you for sharing your story! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@toastedpina]

NotMostGirls build that ladder girl ♡ Your story is inspiring

[@GeorgiaGeorgette]

Kelly Wimer, thank you so very much, bless you 💓

[@GeorgiaGeorgette]

Basic Avocado, thank you very much, that means so much to me 💓

[@kerkie]

Glitter that latter as you climb it, girl! Add some streamers the higher you get

[@Ragingkayjun]

Martina. I am an American Navy combat veteran. I have loved your channel ever since the girl who became my wife introduced me 4 years ago. Thanks for being great! I too know what it is like to deal with chronic pain. I was caught in an explosion caused by a suicide bomber masquerading as an Iraqi pirate while at sea. I was in a coma for 3 days with a 6 inch (15.24cm) piece of shrapnel sticking out of my forehead. The blast induced a thing called sudden nerve trauma or blast induced Neuro trauma depending on who you ask. Seeing how you have coped with your affliction has been a source of strength for me and my wife. I am sorry that I cannot do more for you other than say stay strong, be happy, love others, and be kind, everything else is secondary. Pain hurts, love heals, life continues. Be brave. Simon is with you. Best Regards, Your fan, Kristofer from The Bay.

[@R.Instro]

Fair winds & following seas, brother. =)

[@Colourpeach]

Thank you for your service

[@owlislike]

mikatheraven My husband has TBI ( Traumatic Brain Injury) from IEDs in Afghanistan. The symptoms are very much like PTSD. We take every day one at a time, sometimes one moment at a time if needed. Sometimes we find ourselves overwhelmed, but even during those times we make an awful joke or do something ridiculous to make eachother laugh. What is shown in this video is so important to people who deal with illnesses or injuries that change almost every aspect of their lives. The little things are SO so very important when facing issues like this. Thanks for sharing 💪

[@Rae-cheese]

I'm a teacher. Many of my kids are dealing with trauma far beyond their years, and beyond their coping skills. This video has already been so helpful to me personally. We talked about "building a ladder" in class today. I plan to continue talking about it. I don't comment much on KZbin, but please know that you've had an impact on at least one person across the globe. Thanks for your honesty and introspection.

[@FellowLee]

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[@WhiskeyGuide]

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[@lesterestrella3801]

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[@swetpmnkygrl]

I am guilty of laying in bed on bad days and letting the depression take over. I don't have anyone around me who can understand why there are days where I can't do because my body hurts to much. It hurts to move, it hurts to sit still, it hurts to lie down and some days it just feels easier to curl into a ball on the bed and wait for a new day. Your determination has inspired me to "build a ladder" on the days I can to help me on the days I can't. It's only human to have times when you feel sorry for yourself and ask why me when everyone else can just live normal and it seems so unfair, but struggle builds strength. I remind myself as often as I can and now will try getting out there when I'm maybe not quite feeling up to it in the hope that I can improve my mood. Being in a bad mood while in pain just makes the pain worse. Thank you for inspiring and encouraging and reminding me I'm not alone in the struggle.

[@HeyThisIsJoanne]

swetpmnkygrl your comment is super relatable and yeah, you are not alone!

[@vivalachoba]

You're not alone. I barely manage to wake up some days. Today I'm slightly better but I'm waiting for the pain to kick in soon. I can't deal with this anymore

[@KelSmith95]

swetpmnkygrl I relate to this so much. Thank you for sharing and chin up babe ♥️

[@TombstoneChris]

So relatable. I was first diagnosed with depression at the age of 12. 37 now with a diagnosis of chronic depression. And within the last few years especially this year chronic pain started dominating. Along with fatigue severe exhaustion just from doing small tasks. I used to be able to work in the restaurant business move around stay on my feet for 12-hours work 40 50-hour weeks. I was able to manage my depression but all the sudden the bottom fell out lost my job everything just started going down and medications were no longer working. I've had them shipped it still nothing and nowadays I spend most of my time in bed. I may have one or two good days a week. With the laws where they aren't very difficult to get pain medication. even harder to get disability when you have a mental illness because they can't see it. Chronic depression is no joke. It eats away your brain slowly. And you find everything in your life slowly disappearing into you have nothing. then you're curled up in the bed most days and physical pain because the toll your brain has taken from the depression has now turned into physical problems chronic pain. people tell me I love you got up moving around more you wouldn't hurt well it hurts just to take one step out of bed some days. I've also been developing Parkinson's like symptoms from low dopamine levels that we're never noticed and never diagnosed. I just recently found that out a few months ago so that's freaking scary. But what this woman and this video is doing it so brave. Seeing her get up out of bed knowing she's all that pain is inspiring me to just push through it no matter how bad I hurt.

[@minglim12]

I almost never leave comments on videos, but this one moved me to do so. I've been suffering from depression and anxiety the last few months and there are days where I also feel so dark. Today was one of them. When I started watching this video I had already been lying in bed for hours and was contemplating staying there all day. But I'm following your ladders steps. I got up, made some coffee and I'm going to go take my dog for a walk. Thanks for sharing, I know it must be extremely difficult, but know that you're helping others who suffer too. ❤️

[@secretdiaryofafoodie]

Ming Lim I know I'm a complete stranger but I feel really proud of you for doing that ☺. Keep pushing through!

[@soreeena]

You did so well!!! I'm proud, too. Your comment moved me.

[@juandenz2008]

Once depression takes hold it can be really hard to climb out of that hole. I hope you get better soon, if you are not seeking treatment already I strongly advise you to do so. If you can't afford treatment there are some self help books that might help you such as those by David D. Burns . It sounds like you are taking the right approach though, just take things one step at a time. Good Luck !

[@missbobasawr]

I'm happy and proud of you! You're doing a great job, keep pushing yourself as best you can. You have us in the comments as believers, and I'm sure your dog is just as supportive.

[@LizzyinSerendipity]

That's *amazing* I'm so happy for you :) I'm very familiar with those days, days where it's hard to get out of bed and even more difficult to leave the house. I'm very proud of you for fighting against those dark thoughts and proving to yourself, and to your depression, that you _can_ fight this! Fighting depression is a lot of small battles (getting out bed, making coffee, taking your dog for walk, etc), winning even just one of them is a _huge_ accomplishment when you're in that "dark pit." Let's both continue to add rungs to our ladders! :)

[@nancyminton3064]

After 15 years of being told by doctors that my chronic pain was in my mind, about 5 years ago I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. Living with constant pain saps your energy and your emotions, and sometimes the only reason I get out of bed is to take care of my dogs. BUT, it makes me appreciate the little things, and I have a great sense of what is important and what isn't. Take care Martina, and great thanks to Simon for taking care of you.

[@DreamaMeOnly]

You're certainly not alone it can be a struggle. But staying positive is not always easy. I to have fibromyalgia and in facing a EDS diagnosis myself. I just found out I have severe gastroparesis (stomach only processes food at 9% function) . Why I've been dealing with tummy trouble they thought was just IBS smh Nancy Minton it's going to be ok. And Martina you're a warrior

[@holyhelpme]

have you ever had a doctor tell you that fibromyalgia isn't a real thing? I had a doctor tell me that and I was like wtf? Sucks when docs don't listen to you.

[@aespo5810]

Yes many times unfortunately

[@amandarae5337]

When I first found out of Martina's condition, I was devastated for her. A year or so ago, I was diagnosed with Hypothryoidism. I knew what she was going through was bad but I never thought I would suffer from my own chronic illness soon after. Not only do I support you, but I greatly look up to you now. You put such a bright smile and outlook on life even when suffering. Although our illness are vastly different, I look up to you and how you can stay so strong. You are a role model to me more now than ever. Thanks Martina. For keeping my spirits high. #BuildALadder P.S. Simon, you are a great person. It's hard to find people that put full support to people who are suffering chronic illnesses. You are a blessing.

[@HinataOujoSama]

Bless you love, stay strong and keep building that ladder!

[@rofeitl]

My sister has hyperthyroidism and she really struggled with it before she started taking medication. I hope you're doing well

[@mikatricktricken]

Hi I have EDS and I stumbled upon this video today thank you for making this I live in an area where it gets very cold most of the year so leaving the house is not an option when I'm in high pain but on those days I try to get up and do my hair take a shower or put on some makeup but some days that's not enough I still go through a mental spiral and even my pain management isn't enough I used to have things to do on my ladder that really helped but lately those have been taken away I can't even bake without severe hand pain so my list of hobbies have decreased to pretty much reading my Bible and watching TV I'm hoping this summer things cheer up but for now I have more bad days than good and sometimes just the validation knowing that it's not just me it's this disease helps so seeing someone else have to struggle with this breaks my heart but helps me understand that this is not my fault or anything I did this is just my connective tissue and I can choose to be a victim to it or try to get creative and cheer myself up thanks for posting this video I would do it but even on my bad days I don't think I could take a video so I praise you for doing that when you don't feel well even that was hard I'm sure

[@xyutsuoi3765]

Incredible how she can deal with such a horrendous thing that is forever-lasting pain. I wouldn't even wish this to my worst enemy. Take care, girl.

[@waifwrath]

Martina, this video was amazing. While I love how positive you are all the time, showing this side of chronic pain, and the ways you deal with practically, is so helpful. I have EDS as well (though I have the Classical type), and though mine is usually controlled pretty well, this last month has been really had with school and work. Thank you so much for having the courage to share this side of chronic pain

[@aosteklov]

this video didn't make me feel down at all. the opposite, looking at you feel me up with power and optimism. you are one strong woman!

[@mpdg11]

Hi Martina and Simon. I don't have eds but social anxiety. It developed after I finished my masters and was jobless for YRS. Back then I couldnt meet friends or relatives at all, just out of panic and fear of telling them "yep same old joblessness. no development here". It was so bad that I had anxiety attacks even when doing social things I used to love (e.g. rock climbing) just cause ppl were there 'watching'. I have seeked help and have gotten much better. But still have days where my thoughts turn inward and I simply don't want to face the world. Home is my comfort bubble. But you guys are so right... I can see how forcing yourself out, even when your mind is so dark and gloomy, can make you see and appreciate the beautiful things about life. Martina, you're the strongest woman I know. Your heart and thinking can outlift all those crossfit youtubers out there!! Dunno if ya'll ever read this, but thank you so much for this video. Gonna go build a ladder now (and maybe find a cute fluffy hat too). 😘 ❤🤘

[@harperreese846]

Having just recently been diagnosed with EDS after 9 years of thinking it was only POTS, I really sometimes struggle to see myself living anywhere but where I am right now - 21 years old, jobless, not in school, living with my parents, having them do so much for me. There are days I don't even want to go to sleep because I know that it means waking up and starting the cycle all over again. But you know what? That's life. Everyone has shit they don't want to do, but they do it anyways. And why? Because whether you want to be part of the world around you or not, it will still go on. And I hate it. I hate thinking that I'm so out of touch with myself, so out of touch with my entire life that it will continue to exist with or without me. It hits me harder than my chronic illnesses because at least I can try to control those. And so often I'm stuck between thinking, "There's more than this." and thinking, "This is all I've ever known." But seeing a video like this? Where someone like me is functioning, even if it's just to make it to the end of the day, and able to still enjoy life through the pain? It makes me feel like hey! Maybe I can do it too. So thank you. Thank you for not shying away from the ugly days. Thank you for showing me that giving in is just as bad as doing nothing at all. Thank you for showing me that giving in isn't an option at all! Rome wasn't built in a day. And neither will my ladder.

[@Crystalheartsnerds]

Best of luck to you, well not luck but wishes. I hope that you can find a happy medium where everyday is a good day because you made something good out of it. I believe doing things that make you happy won't take away all the bad stuff, the pain (physical or emotional/mental) but it means when you look back you can be proud you did more than stay in bed, even just doing this is a step forward to a better day.

[@lindatait5326]

Harper Reese Keep going sweetheart! You have a journey ahead of you, at 21 with a new diagnosis you are still very near the start. You expressed yourself so eloquently and with so much optimism that I am certain you will build an amazing ladder to take you to places you haven't yet dreamed of. Much love xx

[@CT-my3kr]

Harper Reese You're doing great, keep fighting!

[@rhijulbec1]

Harper Reese WOW! How very beautifully you express the life of chronic pain sufferers! I'm desperately sorry for your pain and my heart hurts that you are so young, but I also see someone who is awakening to what's possible even while dealing with chronic pain. My advice to my patients (nurse 37+yrs retired) was always "You are not your disease. Your diagnosis is not what defines you. It gives you different parameters than those in good health, but as long as you are willing to stay within those parameters and do yourself no extra harm by" pushing through it", you are still able to participate in life. How you do that is up to you and your medical team, but please don't become your disease. It's what you have, not who you are. "

[@harperreese846]

Thank you guys so much for the positivity! I will keep fighting, and I hope that I will find the best 'me' there is through all of this and take them to great places! ❤

[@katieschultz3566]

I have multiple health issues and have always dreamed of having such a supportive partner. You are the most loving, patient, and compassionate couple I have ever seen. Martina, thank you for showcasing your strength and vulnerability. You're a force to be reckoned with and are an incredible person and role model. Simon, thank you for giving Martina the love and encouragement she needs. Your strength is also incredible. Bless you both infinitely.

[@craftydemon529]

You're so strong. I have bad depression and lots of health issues that make it difficult for me to be active, and even my doctors or parents don't seem to understand how difficult it is for me to be active or do things that are supposed to be simple. But seeing a previous video about your EDS inspired me to put a little more effort. In the beginning of summer this year, I decided that, 1 or 2 times a month, I would try to ride my bike to the park about 2 blocks away and even that was extremely difficult at first. I almost couldn't make it there. But now I'm going almost four times a month. It took awhile, and I still have a lot of difficulties but I'm at least trying now, so thank you very much for sharing with us. You're so far away but yet you've helped me so much, I cant thank you enough.

[@hingepflanzt8002]

I can't tell you the amount of times I've come back to this video over the years. You have such a big positive impact on your community, Martina. Wishing you all the best :)

[@AlexChenAUst]

i wanted to write something deep and gracious to express my awe in you both... 5mins later, the only three words i have are "inspired" and "thank you"

[@바바바바바붐랑]

Simon is literally the best husband ever he's so supportive and cares for Martina so much 😭❤️

[@AyanamiRei5kyu]

when martina cries, i cry i just can't help it T_T i really admire you... you're such a brave and strong woman to find ways to deal with your situation when it's so hard, when giving up is so easy.... and i think you help a lot of people..... i really think you deserve to be happy, life is unfair but i'm glad you search for and find encouragement in all those things.... thank you for encouraging others who deal with the same pain, thank you so much!

[@Aiko73474]

You go girl

[@ashleighlynch7718]

I really like the ladder concept. Chronic illnesses suck :( I like to try to cook something or clean something around the house even if it's just a sandwich or picking up the living room makes me feel more positive and like I accomplished something for the day. But some days when I have to work even just for 5 hours, that's all I can do for the day. Thank you for sharing your experience with chronic pain/illness ❤ and Simon is a good man, as is my husband 😊 I wouldn't get through most of my hard days without him

[@chigasaki06]

You are a strong cookie. I dislocated my shoulder, it popped back in and had residual pain for at least a week. Here you are walking around with a dislocated shoulder for freaking 3 wks. Not to mention the other symptoms caused by your illness. I pray for your continued endurance and a freaking cure.

[@RadioMist]

I know, right?? She's so amazing D:

[@Nonea350]

I have severe depression. My first rung starts with getting out of bed too. I try to surround myself with things that I love, like my pets and my best friend. It's a struggle for me every day but, I'm trying to build my ladder so that I can get out of this dark place. Thank you so much, Martina. I love you guys so much!

[@harrypotato2778]

you have a great friend!

[@Nonea350]

Thank you, guys! 😄

[@sharonzona4346]

My sister used to put a tiara on when she was having a bad day. She passed away 3 months ago from cancer at the age of 32. She also had MS for 10 years before being diagnosed with cancer. I miss her terribly but I have all of her tiaras so that when I'm having a bad day with chronic pain, anxiety, depression, and panic disorder I pick one of them and wear it. It helps me feel close to her but also makes me feel a little better. One of the hardest things for me is getting out. I don't know that it really helps me, but talking with a friend or watching some you tube videos helps. Thank you for showing us what one of your bad days looks like. I want to be able to spend more time with my son (10) and husband so maybe next time I want to just stay in bed and sleep it away, I'll get up and start small. We can always come back homer or continue on with our journey. I also think that having such a super supportive partner helps. I feel that my husband gets it some of the time, but on other days he just doesn't and makes me feel even worse. I'm not trying to deliberately avoid being with my family but I think he feels like I ALWAYS have a choice to get up and go. Sometimes that's super hard. Last night I didn't sleep at all. The night before that either. So that makes it really difficult to function in general, but then when you add all the other crap on top it almost seems impossible. But I'm going to try to build a ladder tonight and see if my boys want to go somewhere for dinner. Thank you, Martina. ❤ And Simon, you're a really good egg.🦆 You seem to go with the flow of Martina can't get out. You'll go do something on your own but you don't make her feel bad about it. But you also seem to be such an encouragement and cheerleader for Martina too. You're a good man, Charlie Brown!! Ok, I'm done now. Truly though, thank you for being so open and courageous about the challenges you face. It really does help to see someone succeeding that's in a similar situation to my own. 🦆

[@GeorgiaGeorgette]

I can't express how deeply sorry I am for the loss of your beloved sister. When you are able to go out, you can experience every good moment on her behalf and in her honour; that way she will live on with you and through you, always 💖

[@amrahedzic4168]

Im so so sorry for your loss but I believe that you are an strong person ❤️

[@momomary1720]

I think you are one of the greatest people!!! It is not easy to share a story like this....I am so sorry for everything and I know you went through a lot.But I can see that you are so strong and you can do anything!!!!! I really hope you see this comment.......

[@katiekawaii]

Maybe it will help to show him this video. It can be hard for some people to understand that another person can be experiencing a day in a fundamentally different way, so maybe watching this can help him see what it takes for another person experiencing something similar to you. I would also show him one of their regular videos so he can see how it isn't a matter of who the person is but rather what they're going through, you know? But, of course, the same goes for him too, I think. These things don't only affect us, they affect the people around us too, so be empathetic for his experience as well. Be gentle with each other. :)

[@orchidcolors]

I want to offer you a hug. Losing your sister can't be easy. I just hope that peace finds you and supports you even when the tears/grief show.

[@izabeth66418]

Having a really bad day today. My chronic illnesses (tendonitis and fibromyalgia) are kicking my butt, I can barely walk around my apartment right now! But I am rewatching your videos about chronic illness and I'm building that ladder. I'm going to try to clean up my apartment a little and maybe go for a light walk when my husband gets home from work later. Thank you Simon and especially Martina for inspiring me. #BuildaLadder ❤♥💛💚💙💜

[@TinTin___Lin]

Is it bad that my eyes started sweating from the moment Martina started talking?

[@teakonorth4393]

I have so much respect and admiration for you, Martina. My heart hurts to see you in so much pain, but I'm so touched by your determination and positivity. Thank you for sharing your life and struggles and triumphs. Thank you.

[@PerunBride]

Superheros don't wear capes, they wear pig's hats...sending some positive energy and hugs.

[@Mar-fs4ph]

Jana Schott best comment ever

[@FoolsLuxury]

I have scoliosis and I needed this video. Thank you. I barely have gotten any sleep lately from my back just tearing me up and it's hard to be positive. Yesterday I was stuck crying and laying on the floor unable to move for a few hours so I crawled myself over to a book and read on the floor to start my ladder. I hope everyone else who watches this gets some hope too.

[@joycoleen4792]

Martina, I have epilepsy which triggers intense migraines where I cannot get out of bed and spend the day crying and holding back vomit. Thank you. Thank you so much, I'm building my ladder. You're a superhero and you are my hero...this year for Halloween I'm dressing up as Martina

[@stargirl7646]

Dressing up as Martina sounds AWESOME. 💗💗

[@joycoleen4792]

::star girl:: instead of Spider-Man we will dress up as the coolest superhero of all Martina! ;)

[@KatieLillyA]

This actually made me tear up.

[@gigipanduh]

Joy-Colleen Murphy that is so sweet.

[@redwolfjoy]

Joy-Colleen Murphy I am new to the community, but I wanted to say to hang in there. I too have epilepsy but to a brain injury as a baby. I had to learn on my own how to deal with my seizures. I am glad you are finding ways to build your ladder.

[@suzyd0ll]

I remember the day i first saw your video regarding your chronic pain and I thought "this is an incredibly strong and awesome person💖" now that i started dealing with chronic pain myself for six months now you're more inspiring to me than ever💕💕💕

[@aubreyarchives]

This is easily applied to all forms of depression. I appreciate this video so much, because I've been watching this channel for years now. Legit all the way back to, "What Costco's are like in Korea." o.o I feel like when I watch your video's it's like this family style vibe I embrace from them. I mean, I've watched you grow from young adults in Korea, to shining online icons with a stellar business that so many people love. Watching Martina feel the way I feel on bad days is like watching a person close to home :( I thank you so much for braving the sharing aspect of showing us this part of your life. I wish you so much love and light, and hopefully some healing of pain. Sending you both big gigantic healthy happy hugs through the airwaves!!!

[@Vervainandrue]

Hi, I’m a chronic pain sufferer also. The most important thing I did to build a ladder was a few years ago, I started fostering homeless and sick cats. Having a houseful of underfed, neglected, ill cats in my House has turned out to be the best possible treatment. No matter how bad I feel, no matter how much pain I’m in, I have to get out of bed to take care of these little beings. They depend on me. And there is so much joy in watching a neglected a cat or kitten blossom and grow into a wonderful, confident animal who leaves to go to their forever home. I highly recommend volunteering for a rescue for anyone dealing with chronic pain.

[@ihikealone]

Thank you for this video, Martina. I'm sitting here crying bc this must be what my therapist meant when she said "happiness is a choice". You are so lucky to have Simon in your life. Your marriage is an example of "the perfect couple", not some Disney princess scenario. Thanks again for this and all of your videos. Also, my Most Bomb Dino says hi to Kogi and pig hat! 🐊🐖🐷

[@RoscoNZ]

Only you guys could make a video on such a sad topic and still leave me smiling and filled with warm fuzzies. The way you both see the world is truly inspiring and your work has such a profound ability to consistently bring joy to my life. Martina, you are remarkable.

[@robbiekukalis3788]

I am not someone that struggles with chronic pain or mental illness or any kind of condition where I'd have to build a ladder like you said, but I'm so glad you posted this so now I can understand what you and other people go through a little bit more. Sending you all my love

[@secretdiaryofafoodie]

Robert Kukalis thank you for making the effort to try to understand. It really helps when people just simply do that, rather than giving advice or feeling too uncomfortable to say anything at all, so thank you.

[@misherusabaku]

I’ve been struggling with going on. Life has hit me harder than ever before, these days are things I never foresaw and I spend them in bed. Watching this and your other videos on building ladders really do help me see some glimmer of light. You’re powerful. You are so powerful. Thank you for making these videos.

[@ZeeNavi]

I... I cried throughout the video.. it's a melancholy feeling, I know the pain, and I wish I could be happy... my outward attitude is strong and relatively positive, but that isn't a close representation of how I'm actually feeling. Seeing this helped me so much, seeing you being so strong and truly enjoying life. I want so bad To get to that place, so thank you. I can't fucking thank you enough, I can't explain how much this means to me.. Thank you Martina. Thank you so much...

[@Churumbelita]

ZeeNavi I hope you get to that place. You deserve happiness.

[@bakingaero688]

have been watching u guys for a very long time and I remember how u guys used to say u didn't want to show us the less happy side of u guys but I'm so proud of u Martina! It's not easy but u're always giving us positivity :-) ❤️

[@Kayveman01]

Omg seeing Martina on the stairs shattered my heart to see her in so much pain...😭 You're so, so strong Martina!!!!

[@calibateman]

I got diagnosed with HEDS after 13 years and I’ve watched this video many many many times because it helps so much. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR POSTING.

[@TsukiNoHimitsu]

My depression makes it hard to concentrate on reading. However I love books, and I read a lot when I was younger. These days reading even just one chapter or page helps me #buildaladder on my bad days and I allow myself to be content with that until the day I can binge read again like I did before. Thank you Martina for this, this is really important topic and not many people show this raw footage of struggling. Thank you 💕✨

[@LizzyinSerendipity]

ahh I relate to this a lot! I've always been a bookworm, I would read for hours and hours and never tire of it! For the past few years, my mental health has made it so difficult to enjoy reading. It's hard to concentrate and everything takes so much effort, I no longer feel that love and enjoyment when I try to read a book. I'm trying to get back into it, because I want to _feel_ like me again and I know it will make me feel better if I accomplish something. Slowly I am adding rungs to my ladder, like trying to read again and seeing a psychologist. #BuildALadder I'm cheering for you~!

[@majesticallyawkward1977]

Serafiina Sigrid - I switched to audiobooks and podcasts. So much easier to concentrate (well, until I fall asleep 😴)

[@annikanin]

This is beautiful honestly. Recently I figured out I had chronic anxiety. I've been lying to myself for a while that it was just something everyone else experienced. Turns out when you're having heart palpitations, and you can barely breath at random points during the day that isn't normal. Sadly I can't do anything to fix it considering I'm terrified of the drugs they use. I can try and make it better though by grabbing a cup of tea, or getting on a good sleeping schedule. I've also had depression for the past two years. I opened up about it to my friends and (since I lied to them last year) they had no idea how much I was suffering.

[@Brayloro]

Annika Nin I'm glad you opened up. It's OK to ask for help. My significant other has chronic anxiety too, and depression and she finally went to get some help and we are doing much better, as a couple and she is better too as she has now some tools to deal with this. There may be no cure, but you can learn to live with it. Some bad days will come along, but there are going to be some good days too. Hugs!

[@WarHorseLover]

Last January I was involved in an accident that resulted in me being unable to move and properly walk for close to a year. This gave me hope that I'm not at the end of my ladder. This was a beautiful and inspiring video, thank you for sharing. Much love to you both

[@audreygardner7907]

Thanks for your positive film. I have mild chronic pain from degenerative disc disease and cerebral palsy. Today was a rough day, I got out of bed, took my meds, talked to my family, took a shower, got dressed, interacted with some friends, ate dinner, filled a physical and occupational therapy papers and watched your film. Thanks for speaking about the ladder, ADLs and ice. Have a great day!

[@Hannah3458]

Seeing how you are when you are "in the hole" before you start building the ladder makes me feel less alone. It made me cry.. You are a real inspiration to me. Thank you for filming on the good and bad days

[@nunyabeezwax8151]

I am super glad you shared this. This is exactly why Pattimae wanted to meet you this past summer. The way you accept yourself, your disorder, and your limits, but still push to be happy and adventurous in spite of it all was truly inspiring to her. The Meeks family sends much love from Texas.

[@eatyourkimchi]

+Dawn Meeks oh my god! I’m so happy to see you comment. I really hope Pattimae has a good time. We were so super nervous. But that Day was a very special memory to us. Thank you for giving that to us :)

[@ioananica795]

I'm strugling with some anxiety issues and you are my inspiration. We are all going to build that freaking ladder!!!

[@eatyourkimchi]

Yes we are! I feel more connected with the reality of how many people are suffering from various issues after opening up and it gives me more hope and more reason to push through. If all of you amazing people are pushing through, I can too!

[@kerensalmeronramirez3511]

Simon and Martina yes!! We can do it! Let's get strength, courage and confidence together ! You are my inspiration and this positive community too.

[@crystalalpaca9859]

I came back to this video because I got diagnosed with fibromyalgia this week on top of the hip condition I was born with. I watched this video again as a reminder to myself of this brilliant way to get going on those difficult days,

[@betlea8070]

Wow! This is unbelievably brave! I have a chronic disease coupled with PTSD. I gave up fighting it in November, went to bed and have been there ever since. Thank you SO much for your inspirational video! I don't want to be where I am but didn't know how to climb out of the pit. Today's first step will be to shower as I know how much better I will feel clean x

[@SoLifeGoes]

I hope the shower was wonderful! Even one step, no matter if it's gone the next day, would be worth it just for the experience of that step.

[@betlea8070]

SoLifeGoes I not only showered but I left the house and met a friend for coffee!!! Your advice really resonated with me and I'm SO grateful xx

[@SoLifeGoes]

Amazing

[@Iceechibi]

Bet Lea That’s amazing! I’m glad you were able to meet with your friend.

[@Emmopie]

I find body wipes and no rinse cleansers to help when I want to feel clean but can't bathe. Here are the ones I use. Hugs if you want them! www.yunibeauty.com/sweat-refresh-go-travel-set/

[@georgeioannou4371]

Thank you Martina, for adding a new step to my ladder of suffering! We all love you guys ❤❤❤

[@amby4093]

I love how supportive Simon is ❤

[@eatyourkimchi]

This was a really tough video for him to film too! He's an amazing husband and best friend. I'm very very lucky to have found him.

[@peachypanda1019]

I'm crying a river over here bc martina is the most sweet, honest, strong and she's just so full of life person I have ever seen on KZbin. I only know her through KZbin videos but its obvious to see that she gives off such a positive vibe even when she's struggling emotionally or physically and through this her beauty shines so bright. I cried not bc I feel sorry or pity martina but its bc she helps me to realize that no matter what kind if struggles I may have, I can surely make it through I just have to keep going and don't stop. How could someone I've never met in person gave me such an impact on life and helped me to look at life in a much more appreciated way. I just wanna say thank you so much martina with lots and lots of love! ❤

[@WailandVic]

This video must have been really hard for you to film but I'm so incredibly grateful that you did. I've suffered from mental illness for about 7 years now. It has consumed almost all my teenage years and I'm in my mid twenties now. Unfortunately I don't have anyone but myself to rely on, no love and my family don't support me anymore. It's tough when the people around you don't understand what you'e going through, can't relate and not respecting that recovery takes a long time(if it's even possible). I'll try and cherish the things I'm able to do more than the things I'm at the moment are not able to, even if the people around me don't think that's enough. What matters is that we all can at least get a bit of light into that darkness each day. So lets #buildaladder together and never give up together! Much love to you!

[@kaskrex]

FantasyTea Sending love to you because you deserve it 💙 i'm sorry you've had to go through the fight with mental illness alone, but I'm willing to be your friend if you ever need someone to turn to ^^

[@caleighrosebud]

Facebook groups have been helpful and supportive! If you'd like, we could be Facebook friends and I can add you to the groups I'm in. 😊

[@missraaae]

We've got you xxx

[@Dimelo.R]

We got you fam #YTubeFam

[@NoOne-of6ie]

FantasyTea Hello, I am so sorry that you feel alone. I also suffer from mental illness. Just know that you are never ever alone. Remember, there are trillion of cells that are trying to keep you alive. lol 😂 If you ever try to hurt yourself, your body will be sad and try to stop you because it is a part of you and it loves you. Also, for anyone who doesn't understand, just walk away or smile, or laugh like a mad person. Hahaha When I'm super depressed sometimes I just start cry laughing which sounds so creepy and I end up frightening myself and laughing about it. Honestly, the strongest being you can count on will always be yourself. Get out of the house, pet random animals do random meet ups, and meet people. They don't have to be the one, or your best friends. It is just to let yourself know that there are people out there, besides your trillion tiny friends, that want you to be alive. ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@adlibby6448]

I love you, Martina! I really, really do.

[@sandyrenewannewithane]

I couldn't stop crying through your video, Martina. I suffer from anxiety and depression. This is amazingly brave video to make. I connected to so much to your strategies, especially looking around really observing things. It is so easy to forget to smell the roses and take for granted the beauty in the world. Sending you all the best vibes! :) Take care.

[@fairyraider8419]

it smudges I suffer from anxiety and depression as well, this video helped me too. You aren't alone.

[@chronicallycrocheting]

I just started watching this and I’m already tears because I understand your suffering. I have a channel and I only do vlogs when I can be a little cheery. My husband always says people are not going to see how bad I really am. I have ME/CFS, POTS, Small Fiber Neuropathy, Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disorder and more.... I deal with daily Chronic pain and torturous fatigue. You are a strong woman. I am so sorry for your all the pain you have to live with.

[@thenerdynymph1306]

Thank you so much for making this video, I suffer from depression and seeing this helped remind me that little goals and accomplishments are just as important as the big ones.

[@amby4093]

We love you Martina. I'm glad you stay strong

[@NerdyWordyQuirky]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Chronic pain truly affects my quality of life and it is so hard some days to build that ladder but I keep trying! Thank you for being such an honest advocate even when it is hard. We love you!

[@NoOne-of6ie]

NerdyWordyQuirky It is SO amazing that you keep trying to build your ladder!!! Keep it up, I am absolutely proud of you trying your hardest to get out your dark pit of pain. You are a BADASS!!!! ♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️❤️❤️❤️❣️❣️❣️😍😍😍🙌🙌🙌

[@NerdyWordyQuirky]

No One This was so lovely!! I see Martina as such an inspiration to me as we share EDS. I don't have the same kind so I think I suffer less but she is so strong and I just find it so amazing. Just watching this video was a ladder in and of itself. It goes on my ladder list.

[@ClementineShmementine]

I have chronic pain but I have never met anyone who is supportive or feels like I’m not. You’re so lucky to have someone who is.

[@puckfaery32115]

Hey. My name is Rebekah. I've been watching your videos for years and haven't commented yet. I watch your FAPFAPs and such when I need a pick-me-up and have shown your videos to my family and friends. I have chronic depression. When you posted your video with your open talk about depression, I never felt closer to someone I've never met. I do not deal with chronic physical pain. I have been in a pit. I know that darkness. I know how consuming that darkness is. And your video was so wondrous to see that others have come out of that pit. You put into words what I lived. I worked, and I tried, and I reached out, and I am continually working on my ladder. Some days, it feels like I'm starting with a new ladder, others are better. I work as a case manager with women recovering from homelessness, addiction, and domestic violence. I am currently working with some women who are living with depression, etc. I have talked with them about what it means to build a ladder. This concept is beyond helpful. It's simple, hard, beautiful, and good. And it's been reaching people that you've never met, or looked at, or thought about. I know I have never met you. I don't even know if you'll ever see this. But you have had an impact, not only in my life, but in the lives of those who meet me. I care for you all (counting Spudgy and Meems in this) and I pray for you daily. Keep doing what you're doing. You both are an inspiration. Not only in living out dreams, but in loving another person (relationship goals) and in speaking your truth and being real. Thank you, Martina, and Simon. You are so very loved.

[@katiekawaii]

I imagine it's probably tough to make a video like this and put yourself out there in such a vulnerable way, especially knowing how important it is to you to present positivity to the world, but it is *so important.* You change people's lives like this. So thank you. I know that I really quickly fall into the trap of isolating myself when things feel bad. I've gone days without even talking to someone outside my family. Thank you for reminding me how important it is not to do that.

[@bailey4x]

"Observing life outside of your own mind is critical to your well being." I could not have said it any better Martina! This channel has been excellent in making me smile. Love the videos xx