What I wish I had known before having my second baby

[@Ray-pt5bi]

I was so afraid to have a second One. Our First is so intense, I doubted I would manage well with two. I waited 4years before getting pregnant again. I have never been happier. It's bizzarre. We have less time for date night, less time for hobbies, yet our First daughter and I have never smiled/laughed this much in our relationship. The baby has brought a totally new equilibrium into our family and I am drunk on happiness. My husband Is more present mentally, also so in love, even during very stressful times..and already almost a year has passed since there are 4 of us. You never know, sometimes babies bring solutions, not more work.

[@Ray-pt5bi]

@@LM-nn7sg yes! I would keep this gap❤️ maybe a slightly smaller One for the next if I could have another? Little sis Is now 19months and we still are floating.

[@LM-nn7sg]

@@Ray-pt5bi thank you for your answer 💜

[@kirs1091]

I appreciate your channel so much because I don't feel bad about supporting you with views because your content is based on you and not showing your kids. I really respect that you respect your boys' privacy. I have a newborn and a two year old right now and I am ...in the pits of despair truly 😂 it's always so nice to hear you talk about how things get better

[@quartzidot4202]

You are an irresponsible mother.

[@whitneylepoudre]

I've been trying for our second for about 2 years and finally 12 weeks pregnant (shh, it's a secret), but now I'm terrified even after trying for so long. Luckily, my son is turning 3, and Im a bit relieved I wasn't pregnant 2 years ago but definitely mourning the idea of having kids so close in age. I'm finding a lot of comfort in these videos, I'm so glad things are going well, as always, thank you for sharing.

[@Ray-pt5bi]

They can still be best Friends with an Age gap! Mine are💕 I Wish you all the best in your pregnancy, try to enjoy it even of you are scared (trust me, I know..)

[@GardyEhija]

This video came in perfect timing! Last night my husband and I were talking about starting to try for our second (which I want) but at the same time it is so scary to “start over” with more on my plate than first time around! Thanks for sharing your experience ☺️

[@graceeboe]

Thank you so much for this video. Currently 33 weeks pregnant with a 19 month old. So many of the worries and concerns you listed have been racing through my mind. This video felt like the perfect dose of truth and perspective that I needed!

[@katrinamadsen493]

I find your videos so calming to listen to and so relatable. Thankyou for taking the time to make and share these videos.

[@mommybreakdown]

“Counters the chaos” 😂 So accurate to each stage of parenthood!

[@Wildflorajewelry]

Thank you so much for this video. I’m due in 7 weeks with #2 and my 18 month old is currently at a very chaotic stage. So it feels scary knowing there’s a second one coming but you really eased my mind on it getting better. ❤ plus I’m sure it’s so much fun watching your boys grow up together!!

[@robbinsitton4315]

I have a 2 year old and 6 month old and am about to switch to the two nap schedule with my youngest. It gives me hope seeing how you’ve navigated things, and that things will get better! I have soooo been loving your videos lately and how relatable you are to my current season of life. Thank you!

[@blond3mom3nts]

My boys are 15 months apart and we’re expecting our third 2 weeks after the oldest turns 3. I love how close they are and seeing the things they are able to learn and discover together. Mental health has been a slight issue, but it’s because my husband is finishing up his last year of his undergrad so trying to balance being the working parent with the physical/mental stages of pregnancy is what has taken the biggest toll on me.

[@abbyk6927]

This video actually made me so excited for my second! Thank you for your honesty! :)

[@brittanyanderson1748]

Thank you for this video and the reassurance on the sleep. I’m so nervous for the long nights again!!

[@EllieFarrugia]

Thank you for this video! I currently have an 18 month old daughter and ever since I had her I have been going back and forth about whether I want another baby. On one hand, I really want her to have a sibling to grow up with & to have that bond with someone, but on the other, I feel guilty that she won't have all of our attention if we have another. She's also quite a "needy" baby, I don't like saying that, but I don't know how else to phrase it, she needs me next to her at all times, even if she's playing independently she wants me there, if I try to get up to do anything she instantly follows me and screams until I come and sit back down/pick her up. So I've been worried about how she would deal with me not being able to entertain her 24/7, but you made me realise that I'm applying how she is now to how she would be with a sibling, but who knows how she will be in the 9 month+ before the baby would be born, they change so fast. Sorry for this super long rambly comment, I think I just needed to type out my fears to work through them haha.

[@EllieFarrugia]

Also oh my god, how have I only just noticed that my youtube username is EllieLovesTwilight?!? I created this account when I was like 15 and while it's still true, I don't think it's quite fitting for me at 28 years old :') How long have I been commenting on videos with this handle, how embarrassing hahaha.

[@AshleyEmbers]

Hahahahhaha omg this is amazing 😂😂😂

[@AshleyEmbers]

As for you first comment, your baby also might become less clingy when there’s another little one to play with! Can’t say for sure but there are potential positives to look forward to 😄

[@rchhtt5210]

My daughter is almost 17 months old and I am in a very similar place. My daughters temperament is very easy but we are definitely joint at the hip. I’d love to give her a sibling but I also love having all my focus on her. I struggle so much with the newborn phase and I didn’t feel like myself until probably a few months ago. I struggled with postpartum ocd and depression so I am scared of postpartum… I love toddlerhood though. The older she gets the more I enjoy motherhood. It’s just do I really want to potentially go through it all again… idk. Postpartum was a dark place for me and I was depressed throughout my pregnancy, as well as having insomnia. I feel genuinely happy and optimistic for the first time in years. Who know what will happen. I’d be okay if she was an only child but I’ve also had baby fever off and on for a while lol.

[@EllieFarrugia]

@@AshleyEmbers I hope that's the case 🙏I definitely want her to have a sibling, it's just a matter of when I'll be ready to face pregnancy again 🤢😅

[@theunicornrainbow363]

Thank you so much for this. We wanna have a second baby soonish and our first is 10 months old. Our son is an early walker. All of a sudden I feel so insecure, because I'm constantly running after him and our tiny flat is a mess at all times. I lost my job after maternity leave. So I have to take on mini-jobs whenever I can for financial reasons. I do really start to feel like I'm losing my personality within the chaos. This is just the video I needed.

[@pitounesky7604]

Thanks for sharing your experience. My daughter is now 13 months old. I know deep in my heart I want more kids (not sure how many, but at least 2 kids), but part of me is afraid. I was lucky to have a super easy first pregnancy (almost no symptoms!) and fast delivery that went smoothly, but god post-partum was hard! I wasn't prepared for that level of exhaustion. Sleep with my baby was such a struggle. Even my back to work was harder then anticipated . I just start to feel more normal again. Glad to hear that things get better as kids get older. I'm not planning for a second one just yet, but probably it will be in our plans in the next year. 😉

[@bananapancakes311]

See I have the opposite problem 😢 my husband has that perspective where he feels it would be so hard with two. I have no worries. I just hope and pray he changes his mind soon.

[@tnicole902]

Thanks for this video, I really needed to hear it. We have a 2 year old and I want another soon, but I had such a hard time post partum that I'm afraid to have another.

[@mairvila4838]

Thank you for this. I know I want a second kid but I was really scared, feeling more confident now to be honest

[@joselynfulbright8128]

Wow the timing..... I just found out I'm pregnant literally 4 days ago and I'm absolutely terrified.

[@alc9991]

Ugh this opposite nap schedule is coming soon for me and I’m so scared I won’t get any alone time during the day, I need to try and adjust naps to overlap some too!

[@godalemni6785]

I really needed this video my babies are going to be 19 months apart

[@mommybreakdown]

You have this little phrase that you say often and I totally think it should be on a mug one day when you have merch. You say, “not the case” and I love it.

[@AshleyEmbers]

Hahaha that’s so funny I’ve never noticed. I’ll definitely pay attention to that now 😄

[@mommybreakdown]

@@AshleyEmbersnow you will always notice it 😂 I’ve realized I use certain phrases as a teacher. My kids pointed it out haha

[@heatherhouston4279]

Love all of your content! Can you do a video about them room sharing and how the transition went and any tips!! I have a 2yr old and a 8mo and my plan is to transition them together when the 8mo sleeps through the night but also does Finn ever wake Rook if he wakes crying?? All the tips would be appreciated!!

[@AshleyEmbers]

I recently made one! kzbin.info/www/bejne/fYjaeGhoa86HbK8si=0BqvXy8TN8iztbvE

[@Jillianrc]

Thanks for this video! Our daughter is 14 months now and we’re not in a rush but are considering the pros and cons of having another. My daughter is extremely social and I feel like she would benefit from a sibling.

[@mrsdaisymama]

This is really encouraging. I’m probably in the thick of the transition to toddler stage (my son is about to be 15 months) and I’m currently 20 weeks pregnant! Is it true that exhaustion is worse during pregnancy with a toddler vs newborn and toddler?

[@genevieveevans7307]

Im pregnany with our second and this is by far harder then the pregnancy i had with my son, the fatigue is crazy and feels like it has lasted yhe entire 6 months of pregnancy. Im also dealing with the thought of having a newborn and extremely active 3yo, im trying not to worry about it too much but somedays im like oh shit. However its not to say im totally over the moon about having our second child, its just daunting 😁

[@mikailadasilva]

I appreciate your honest so much! It is refreshing.

[@rachelle2227]

Good time for me to see this, I just found out I was pregnant with baby number 2 on Sunday. LO is 19 months old, and we got pregnant in the first month. This is the same age gap as my sister and I, so that’s awesome. We are lucky since my husband gets 3 months of paternity leave. I’m considering potty training my LO when she is 2 before our second comes. I hope she’s ready by then and it goes smoothly, so then at least we would only have one in diapers.

[@buzzi2k]

This is so incredibly reassuring

[@AshleyEmbers]

💛

[@feliciasuris2381]

My son is 20m old and up until now I was set on only doing one child because how bad my mental health worsened after having him and I had HG so lost alot of weight during pregnancy and sick all the time. Now that I'm doing a bit better and have good therapy and connect more, I think I want one more. I won't try right now and have a iud I'm contemplating on keeping cause the hormones etc. I'd want him to be over 2 before even trying. However I'm so scared I'll be sick bad again and er visits like the 1st time and not be good enough for my toddler. Idk if I should try or not to and end up regretting the do or don't 💜

[@rickykessler2186]

Will you be having more children?

[@laurenhartso]

This is so helpful!

[@olgaielts7644]

This is so encouraging !!! Thanks a lot ❤

[@tatianapatricia9551]

I love your hair!

[@sschweiz93]

As a SAHM, who has a very flexible part time job from home, the comments that slant moms at home as lazy or doing nothing strike me as people who have never thought about how expensive daycare, nannies, or any other type of childcare is. Nor have they thought about why those people are paid! The daycare worker is not accused of doing nothing all day! The nanny is not accused of doing nothing all day! Usually, the response is all the lines of "The kids are learning so much. Look at what they can do. Their teacher tells me all about the amazing things that my child did all day." Well, a SAHM is doing all of that! Plus, don't forget if you are in your house all day with your kids, you are actually using your house all day. So much more cleaning and upkeep than even the working parents (which is tough too! Kids can make a tornado in minutes, so there is still additional upkeep there). It was a revelation as a new mom to realize that I had to clean more because we were doing more in the house. It is a vicious cycle in upkeep! Full disclosure, though, I have two boys and pregnant with a 3rd one and am still jealous of the girl moms-it seems easier though I am sure it is not!

[@evapoole4514]

🥰

[@frankiebee2980]

Nap trap is such a myth. Work out the schedules so that there is space between - takes a little effort, ya might have to wake your kids earlier to get them to sleep earlier - it’s not a big deal. Nobody is stuck so some imaginary clock where your kids HAVE to nap at an exact hour of the day. Totally doable

[@Sarah.g.carter]

Every experience is different.

[@samanthastawick6289]

Lmao pumping is still breastfeeding