Eva Illouz introduces Why Love Hurts

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Eva Illouz of the Hebrew University of Jerusalem introduces her new book, Why Love Hurts. She argues that, while love has always had the capacity to hurt, since the advent of modernity it has hurt in new ways as so much more of ourselves is invested in the choice of a partner. And in recent years that choice has expanded exponentially with the emergence of internet dating.

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@talzander 9 жыл бұрын

Hi eva, I just want to thank you for writing this amazing book and for your entire life's work. It never stops to amaze me how better understanding improves my life. Your book is full of enlightening thoughts and I feel it is one of the most important books I've ever read, and I've been through many classics and many great books written by the some of the best minds humanity has produced. I wish your ideas will raise peoples consciousness as to, at least, the questions you've wrote about. I think it would make our world better, suffering being less pervasive and love more common. I think the key has to do with ones love of the fact that he is alive, and his fearless realization that he is mortal - and that serves to raise his moral ambition as well as his love of freedom and spontaneity. In this way a man\woman gets almost completely synchronized with modern standards for relationships, some of which are described in the book, and the world becomes more reasonable and considerably less threatening. One more thing is that I think some cultures are lagging behind on modern sexuality and relationships, thus presenting a different mixture of modernity and antiquity. So although the book didn't directly speak about my experience it did give me tools with which i can create my own view, and improvise. I always thought these things are beyond the capacity of a human mind to understand. Reading your work has undeniably gave me the courage look deeper into the love aspect of my life. Thank you.

@jonsilence 8 жыл бұрын

Thank you Eva for addressing insightfully a question of primary importance. I think that the reason 'love gone bad' hurts so much is a very simple one: any 'positive' feeling, when inverted, retains its essential emotional power which is then felt with the same intensity that has become 'negative'. In other words, if 'love' is a +10 on a scale of emotion, it inverts and becomes a -10 when the 'love' has been damaged or destroyed. With zero (o) as a baseline, a positive +10 feeling does not invert to a negative -3 when love goes bad, but simply 'flips' and fully inverts to a -10.

@PolityBooks 11 жыл бұрын

"What we have lost, in a way, is the capacity to hierarchise who we are and what we want in another person." Thanks for you question, I hope that helps to clairfy Eva's argument.

@fkostyuk 4 жыл бұрын

Hello, could you please allow editing subtitles on this video? I would like to add Russian subtitles on it so that I can introduce Eva's book to Russian audiences