Every Zero Punctuation 2007

[@Noon3rs]

“You can now enjoy Zero Punctuation every Wednesday on the escapist magazine.” Godspeed, Yahtzee, you charismatic stallion.

[@pottage97]

16 years of mostly excellent content, that's a hell of a record. And hopefully he continues to create in some form. I'm interested in trying out his new game Starstruck Vagabond when it comes out, it looks promising.

[@toffeespartan]

People questioning the need for this have never gone to sleep listening to Yahtzee's sweet voice

[@Mabigato]

it's insane how relaxing it is hearing him rant for 4 hours, I can barely get through 30 minutes before I'm asleep, it's so blissful

[@emmagoldman2399]

Legit came to say this. Now I actually want to know how many other people do this

[@kristiqnchoto]

Yahtzee's voice is perfect for after work traffic also.

[@RafaMieses]

Good to know im not alone on this

[@UkazutoX]

with the benefit of not having a way louder than it should be intro going off every 5 mins

[@SlickSy]

0:00 - The Darkness Demo 2:57 - Fable: The Lost Chapters 6:15 - He announces that he was hired by The Escapist 6:52 - Heavenly Sword / Resident Evil 5 Trailer 11:46 - Psychonauts 15:54 - Console Rundown 19:37 - Bioshock 23:06 - Tomb Raider: Anniversary 26:19 - Manhunt 29:29 - Peggle 32:41 - Halo 3 36:02 - Tabula Rasa 39:11 - The Orange Box 43:04 - Super Paper Mario 46:38 - Medal of Honor: Airborne 50:26 - The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass 53:50 - Clive Barker's Jericho 58:13 - F.E.A.R. Perseus Mandate 1:01:16 - Assassin's Creed 1:05:30 - Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock 1:08:55 - Mass Effect

[@LOLquendoTV]

Respect

[@Asliferollson]

Damn my dude, very nice 👍🏻

[@20xd6]

I'm pretty sure you're only allowed to watch this vid in one sitting, in keeping with the zero pauses theme.

[@starchlord89]

You’re not the hero that we deserve, but you’re the hero we need.

[@hoodboy20001]

Not all heroes wear capes

[@jayjayson2540]

Hearing these reviews from 2007 in 2019, I'm reminded of one of my favorite quotes from Yatzhee. "Let's all laugh at an industy that never learns anything teeheehee"

[@XylonLionheart]

"Overall, though, I like Assassin's Creed. At least it's trying something new and different to the legions of clones stinking up the market." -Yahtzee 2007

[@ezekielmartin4323]

It's like a flashback to when the hero and the villain were friends in high school. "YOU WERE MY BROTHER, ASSASSIN'S CREED! I LOVED YOU!" *"I LOVE MONEY!"*

[@kidragakas]

“Phrases That Aged Like Milk”

[@jaceross7648]

Oof that didn’t age well

[@szoketamas3678]

To be fair, 2007 was pretty much the season of hacky slashy type games, so AC was a breath of fresh air, now it's kinda the opposite. So many games have this mandatory open world do as you please AC stile, that an og God of War or anything really, would be like a glass of water to a bloke who is stuck in a desert.

[@dlxmarks]

I recently read a 2011 review of _AC: Revelations_ that began with "A satisfying conclusion to the stories of two main characters is marred by potential series fatigue..." Understatement of the gaming decade.

[@benwasserman8223]

Ah 2007, back when Bioshock was revolutionary, Call of Duty showed impressive narrative quality and Nathan Drake was a budding Playstation icon and mass murderer. Simpler times...

[@arterra61]

This is true and it's also sad... You made me sad gaming became this weird toxic thing

[@TheProfessor529]

And casual games were still good and mostly consigned to the PC.

[@Vanillastump]

And when Half-life 3 was 100% going to happen.

[@v0id19]

And Assassin's Creed was new and unique

[@icarue993]

@ben dover Back when mgs was good...

[@maddie9602]

It's funny to hear the dramatic increase in sound quality after he was hired by the Escapist.

[@RRproductionsTV]

wow, the change in Yathzees voice through the ages is amazing.

[@ciphergacha9100]

And an improvement in the microphone he uses

[@pajamapantsjack5874]

Remember when his intros had random classic songs in it? Those were the days

[@bdough5012]

The potentially screwed, demonetized unlicensed use of intellectual property days... I'm with you! But I also get why that changed lol

[@urchinscurvy2049]

Pajamapants Jack aren’t you the same person who wrote the devil Spider-Man song in those comments

[@dontwrite9s4ever86]

They weren't random they had some relevance to the reviews entirety

[@patternedpike3746]

At 39:58 "While [Valve] have aspects one and two down they continue to struggle with 3." Is damn funny to me in hindsight.

[@traviswilliams2348]

I'll take it. It's not like KZbins algorithm is anywhere near smart enough to recommend these to me and I don't fancy spending an hour digging through a search bar to find them. So this is a welcome gift.

[@TheReZisTLust]

An hour? It took 25 seconds to go to their playlists and click the open mod arrow once to find the over 700 zero punctuation videos playlist & while yea not only just the reviews but also streams but they can be skipped

[@RealDavidTodd]

This is the darkest time line. We actually are in the future where every game is Captain Bland’s monotonous adventure

[@VeryPeeved]

no, it's not that bad. just almost every AAA game and a good portion of indie games.

[@2Scribble]

Spoiler: We were already there - 'cause Yahtzee was already bitching about it xD

[@adreamer5920]

I got an hour to waste Why not I've already rewatched every episode like 1000 times

[@miki-u7c]

A Dreamer same

[@jdbruiser]

Well what are you waiting for? Train your cat to fly a kite.

[@progect3548]

That is plausible because according to my calculations, this entire series is around 2 days long (to be precise, 1 day, 23 hours, 50 minutes, and 24 seconds.) according to your comment, you have rewatched this series around 1000 times. That is ~2000 days. Assuming that your sleep schedule is as screwed up as mine and you watch this series every second you are awake, you watch this for 12 hours a day. 2000*2=4000 4000 days is 10 years and 1/6th of 10 years. 1/6th of 10 years is around a year and a half. 11 years and a half is under 12 years, which is how long this series has been alive. So it is plausible you have watched this series 1000 times.

[@alex.g7317]

@@progect3548 way to take a joke seriously. well done, I'm impressed.

[@RedStickInc]

Zero Punctuation on blu ray please

[@wildwolf1221]

Yes!

[@kazmark_gl8652]

fuck I'd buy all of ZP on blue ray without commercials

[@GalanDun]

And uncensored, unlike this

[@everythingsgonnabealright8888]

Would buy in a heartbeat!

[@HadBabits]

As big a part the old Zero punctuation was to me as a teen, how outdated it looks would make it hard to justify for me. I'd probably do it if he actually remade the visuals in a current resolution. Probably quite a few months of work, to be sure, but I think probably doable since it's a slideshow and how used Yahtzee is to this format. Bonus points if they can license the original music intros. Could be wrong, but provided the Escapist can market it competently, I think they could turn a good profit on that. And I do think it'd just be nice as a means of preserving it for the future.

[@hazardouscube0878]

44:39 they removed the line "for my crippling fear of catching the gay". 1:08:54 they removed the line "I'm not gay"

[@Laticia1990]

So clearly he caught the gay. cheers

[@Cuthawolf]

Yeah they removed some other lines too.

[@TheProfessor529]

30:50 They also tightened up the slide transition timing here.

[@bigzuben]

CENSORSHIP

[@wasneeplus]

And I miss the evil noticeboard from the Fable review. Probably because of the picture of Hitler on it. Too bad, I loved that joke. Are we really that sensitive in 2019?

[@laytonjenner6987]

I remember watching X-play on G4 and having some of these early episodes played in full on the show to give him exposure, I was in middle school at the time and since then I've yet to let a Wednesday pass without watching the show. Keep up the great work Yahtz.

[@danielg3857]

never knew they put him on TV, that's pretty hilarious given how unrestrained he is

[@PrebleStreetRecords]

@@danielg3857Admittedly, all of G4/TechTV was unrestrained at the time.

[@alex_evstyugov]

Looks like Christmas came late that year. Twelve years late.

[@CynicSnacks]

Strap in boys, it’s going to be a long one.

[@qdllc]

Back when we thought an hour, twelve minutes was “long.”

[@JustinY.]

You were so preoccupied with whether or not you could, you didn't stop and think of if you should.

[@joost0133]

They should and now they did

[@foeof]

I hope this comment gets pinned.

[@Skerp129]

Get your "Deep" twitter quote ass out of here

[@TheLordAizen]

Do bots upvote this dude

[@Skerp129]

@@TheLordAizen yes

[@gibshit4118]

I was 12 in 2007, watching this video makes me appreciate how much Yahtzee improved my ability to insult people, he is single handedly responsible for the dozens of hours I spent in the principles office as a child, and I will always love him for that.

[@zeophen]

"...we've reached or nearly reached the point where graphics aren't going to get much better" - 2007 Yahtzee Makes me wonder how wrong I am when I think that these days.

[@thatdapperfellow]

He wasn't wrong then.

[@jopearson6321]

@@thatdapperfellow Agreed. I don't graphics have gotten *meaningfully* better since Crisis.

[@Wizuu0274]

Oh, shit, you guys ARE doing them retroactively. Very much appreciate it.

[@JamesTobiasStewart]

Ah yes, here we go. This is very handy.

[@copperhead577]

Yeah, I could use one. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[@septemvii]

The amount of times I said "oh just you wait Yahtzee" in this video were astronomical. Like when he said Assassin's Creed was new and fresh, or when talking about how casual games were threatening the hardcore. Remember the days when Popcap seemed like the biggest threat to a strong narrative driven single player experiance? Those were the days...

[@septemvii]

OH and when he said Half Life 2 Ep2 would be good to play while waiting for episode 3, I laughed out loud.

[@adarshsirsat9110]

This is better than pornhub

[@pluransart1795]

Hey, watch your mouth!

[@BarnacleButtock]

This should be on pornhub

[@LikeTheBuffalo]

Remember when a new Half-Life game came out? Now _that's_ nostalgia.

[@nathanielgrey4091]

I am sad now.... BoJack is appropriate

[@D00dlebugInc]

Guess what...

[@r4z0rv1n3]

But the real question is did Yatzhee ever find out what Twing-Twang was?

[@Skullhawk13]

It’s a lesbian act performed with a bowstring >.>

[@pinpout1803]

but there's a comma Yahtzee 0:21

[@20xd6]

whoosh

[@PsychoPlissken]

R.i.p. zero punctuation. You will be missed 2007 - 2023

[@Kriss_ch.]

Wow, 12 years back and Assassin's Creed was trying something new and fresh and interesting.

[@bradymenting5120]

"there tends to be a knee jerk reaction to perceived racism these days" me in 2020: "ahahaha how quaint. he thought 2007 had problems with outrage culture."

[@hoagielamp6543]

How old are you? Maybe you should have traveled throughout the American south after the Obama election.

[@AaronCorr]

Really appreciate you guys putting them out like this. When binge watching ZP youtube often runs in circles unless I watch a playlist. And a loud ad every 5 minutes that I skip anyway is the bane of my existence! But as a compilation it's perfect to watch while doing stuff.

[@dontwrite9s4ever86]

This is the year I graduated and was looking for quality games.. Yatzhee recommend Deus Ex, Grim Fandango, Thief series, Anachronox, System Shock 2, Silent Hill 2, The Dig, Pyschonauts, Planescape Torment ect.. no regrets and so much nostalgia from back then.

[@olbluehat]

I was JUST making a Playlist that other people have compiled with no punctuation. Thanks Escapist! Now my views can go where they need to.

[@ezekielmartin4323]

The image at the end of the Tomb Raider _hurk_ Anniversary review of Yahtz kneeling in front of the TV and shaking his fists in a deranged frenzy while rattling off every word for breasts that he knows is fucking superb.

[@grantd165]

Its quite staggering how yahtzee has kept his writing so fresh and funny all this time.

[@isauldron4337]

17 of october of 2007: "Episode 2 does suffer a little from being the middle child, there's no real beginning and no real end so the story tends to meander around and it's difficult to shake the feeling that we're just killing time before the next episode wraps it all up. " We are in 2019 and no episode 3

[@TPrime85]

December 2024 says hello 😅

[@tahutoa]

18:02 little did he realize the increase in disc space with a blue laser, which was responsible for the upscaling, would be astronomical

[@auraleefae]

YES! Thank you, these are awesome ❤️

[@MylesMusic94]

I remember seeing some of these on X-Play on G4. Hell of a time

[@Gilhelmi]

Those were his first few episodes. I remember those days as well.

[@noneofyourbusiness4133]

"I'll jab forks into my eyes if I ever say that about any game ever again" I guess he has no eyes... since he said the same thing about Undertale :)

[@victoriousf.i.g.3311]

I like how 2007 Yahtzee sounds like a surly primary school student who's been forced to read an excerpt from a textbook. Much different to the openly aggressive, explosively cynical tone of his later work.

[@jaspern.7702]

RIP Zero Punctuation 2007-2023

[@lufenia]

it's so weird hearing his younger voice!

[@davidpowers746]

and cadence.

[@sailoritaly]

Are they going to upload every year of Zero Punctuation?

[@maddawgmcgee]

Hopefully

[@starkindustries26]

Yes, Yahtz said they will on one of the post zp streams.

[@evo555666]

Yeah. They made the guy who uploaded the complete collections of zp take his videos down so my guess is they are planning on doing them all at some point

[@hoodedman6579]

They've done it for 2 years; I don't see why they would stop now, it can't be that hard to make them.

[@astrothsknot]

@@evo555666 I was under the impression they'd actually got his files as well

[@tidmouthmilk12]

It's as if Escapist knew I'd been binge watching all the episodes lately... *suspicious eyes*

[@GentlemanNC]

Would actually be nice to get the intros/outros just for this year. I loved the thematic song choices and it was one of the reasons I first started watching (literally been following his videos for 12 years now, I'm getting old).

[@lnt305]

Super late to the party, but I would assume they couldn’t do this for the same reason he stopped doing those: Copyright

[@Kitty-hf6vq]

The end of an era

[@samjuan4899]

The first 2 videos (Darkness/Fable) weren't really part of Zero Punctuation. They were called Fullyramblomatic Review.

[@TheRogueEmpire]

and yet in the very 1st video there was a punctuation. 3/10

[@User-Ryan135]

Fullyramblomatic. Wasn't ZP until the 3rd game

[@AgentTasmania]

Ah, 2007. An 8-10 hour campaign being called too short for a AAA shooter. Within ten years it was notable for the campaign to still exist

[@alexdavies3483]

2007 was 25 years ago. Really makes you think.

[@rinke703]

Really makes you think.

[@nullplan01]

Off by 100%. Oh well, better luck next time.

[@Dorumin]

Really makes you think.

[@rodrigobento4570]

Look at these two peasants still living in 2019

[@theuserofthissite]

we truly do live in a society

[@Simte]

Does this DVD comes with the director's commentary?

[@coltonallgire1135]

I actually never saw anything earlier than The Escapist channel... So I'm excited for this

[@WOLF36554]

His older videos have become a sweary museum of video game history.

[@Moka-kc6op]

Thank you so much for posting this

[@beccar9]

yes! I hope they do one of these for every year of zero punctuation! I love putting them on in the background while I work.

[@Rianoria]

This was the golden year together with 2008

[@jamestowns653]

Zero Punctuation: most gamer's favorite bedtime story

[@CubiStudios]

2007 is one of the greatest years for gaming of all time.

[@CubiStudios]

Man, remember when everyone sounded awful on the internet?

[@FauxJas]

They still do, it used to be audio quality, now its the anti-opinion hate rants that make people sound awful.

[@ninjabiatch101]

The doom fortress thing always gets to me. Most people don’t know about them. But they were called Flakturm and definitely existed.

[@petwisk2012]

We are Just kiling time before HL epsode 3 comes out... Tô 2007 Yahtzee i have a bad new to tell

[@spartanc173]

16:00 "Like the residents of a backwards Louisiana swamp." 10 years before the release of RE7 this was.

[@thegrumptastic]

God I was hoping this would happen!! I often binge this show in the background while doing stuff! Yes please do all the years.

[@Ange1333]

Wow the half life 2 episode 2 review broke my heart a bit, ah how naive we were

[@hasanz7585]

Swear to god these 2000s Internet videos have such a vintage feeling to then Feels great to relax to

[@Laticia1990]

"I like Assassin's Creed." 2007 was wild. Also wishing that games stop relying on graphics and focusing on more depth? *looks at Anthem reviews* We've learned nothing....

[@AlmightyPolarBear]

It's been like that for a decade and a half. People NEED as much realism as they can get.

[@ElementalWorkshopII]

This makes me so happy. Now I have the best thing to fall asleep to. Thanks!

[@Lordofthe44]

i love that instead of just removing the compilation videos of zero punctuation the escaist figured out what people want and also gave it to them

[@lowenergyvideos4658]

Ive gone on binges of this before but youtube being youtube, sometimes it forgets how to do a list so this can be both useful and fun in the future, more so if you do every year!

[@legoworksstudios1]

In hindsight, the ZP trailer announcing Yahtzee's move from his original channel yahtzee19 to Escapist Magazine, in my opinion, would've benefited from a few seconds of The Police's "Message in a Bottle" for the messages in bottles reference as opposed to Stevie Wonder's "Superstition". Whether or not it was on the nose, it would've felt appropriate to use that track instead. Still, just my opinion.

[@owenabbiss3443]

to think that Yahtzee was asking everyone to stop focusing on graphics and just make great games all the way back in 2007 :(

[@takuansoho5836]

Strangely I died around one third of the video, after holding my breath for 25 minutes.

[@Godzeller3143]

I like being validated from the comment section in so far as I’m not the only who listens to these to go to sleep.

[@vulpineechoes]

It's that time of the year again folks: The yearly binge of all the available ZP compilations, let's heckin go

[@JoshMC2000]

Honestly the whole british troops being missing really pisses me off about alot of ww2 shooters. Id love for someone to make a ww2 shooter with all british and other allied troops with no american soilders in site for once.

[@daniellehohensee2021]

Oh boy, time to binge the entire ZP archive again!

[@clawlion8]

I love how much growth you can see from the beginning to the end the video

[@Hydra572HQ]

Censorship makes you look bad. The setups for the jokes are still there. We remember the punchlines. Are you ashamed of your work?

[@el-fantasma21]

2007..... the golden era...

[@SupremeMarioGamer]

46:31 It's amazing how prophetic Yahtzee was on the future of Paper Mario

[@marioanothlp]

check on 35:40 and think about "live-services" and the uselessness of criticism nowadays....fucking eye-opening.

[@SimulatedDumplings]

He is a modern day video game Oracle. So many of his horrible game suggestions have become reality over the years. It’s fantastic on one hand, and terrible on the other. Between him and Jim Sterling they basically predicted every shit game design decision over the last 10+ years.

[@zylaaeria2627]

Yahtzee, the very definition of same shit different day & I love it. I was introduced to Zero Punctuation from a UT2004 pack back around 2011. It was a Yahtzee playermodel with a voice pack containing various lines from various episodes. Instantly fell in love with the guy lol.

[@thegamethemovie9605]

Ask, and we shall receive! Awesome to see 2007 done too! More, please!

[@kingdonnie1342]

That audio quality is god tier.

[@Grymbaldknight]

I know editing these compilation videos together must be the biggest chore in the world. To whoever's doing it, though, you're doing God's work. If i ever meet you when you're done, i'll buy you a drink.

[@TheReZisTLust]

Its just recoding the video and pausing then cutting out the intro outro and adjusting the volume rinse and repeat about 700 times. Nothing too hard at least.

[@Grymbaldknight]

@@TheReZisTLust I mean, i said i'd buy them a drink. I didn't promise to buy them a yacht. A few hours tedium for the benefit of many people is worth the gift of a beer, yes?

[@traviswilliams2348]

A puppy obidience school with an unusually large security detail. Fucking brilliant.

[@idraigirtm]

Haha, 2007, when you couldn't tell the difference between DVD and BluRay

[@eligoldie9626]

I was 8 years old when this came out. I'm now 24 😢

[@SagarSiddhpura]

I needed this when I couldn't sleep. Thanks

[@KevbotFalconhammer]

Man, what a nostalgia filled video.

[@Wymorence]

This is one of those videos you sit and watch, and then suddenly realize you've sat there for an hour without realizing it until it ends.

[@erictheredguy]

Listening to this review in 2021. He said in 2007 Graphics are going to get much better. Holy crap they did. He also said Blu-ray wasn't much better

[@JH-ex4sg]

I listened to all of these when i worked at Walmart before the hell virus made working as a grocery stocker a first responder tier job

[@spacesuitian9745]

I have been watching Zero Punctuation weekly for 12 years.... What has my life come to...

[@Asliferollson]

What has your life BEEN? answer? Ehh probably mediocre

[@Formoka]

I love these videos. Though it is a little disconcerting when the jokes are edited. I get why they're edited, considering which ones are missing, but it does feel a little like walking down the stairs and expecting another step instead of a sudden drop.

[@SaidinCheyneStokes]

I watch the Wii Vs PS3 Vs 360 episode every time there's a new console generation. I am an old, old man, man.

[@mrpenguin4990]

OMG thank you for brining those back

[@Brett_is_Veng]

Ive been with you since the start, or near to it anyway, Bioshock got bought because of your review and ive never regretted getting a game you love. I need therapy as a result

[@xKalamity]

As someone who uses these compilations to fall asleep, I appreciate that I can support the escapist with views/admoney. But putting so many interspersed ads really jars me out of my sleep when they play. I'd appreciate it even more if you changed it to just one ad at the beginning. Thanks for listening.

[@mr.bobcyndaquil4214]

KZbin has a nasty habit of inserting midrolls whenever it feels like