Every Zero Punctuation 2009

[@ForReviews-qn1jm]

0:05 Awards for 2008 4:53 Tomb Raider: Underworld 8:57 Far Cry 2 13:16 Gears of War 2 17:32 Little Big Planet 21:54 Satan Butt 22:18 Thief: The Dark Project 26:21 Skate 2 30:38 FEAR 2 34:52 Spiderman: Web of Shadows 39:03 House of the Dead: Overkill 43:09 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand 47:27 Resident Evil 5 52:15 XBlades 53:57 Halo Wars 58:52 Pedigree Chum 59:12 GTA Chinatown Wars 1:03:38 MADWORLD 1:07:48 Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X. 1:11:56 Siren Blood Curse 1:16:07 Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena 1:19:57 Valkyria Chronicles 1:23:57 Velvet Assassin 1:27:48 Duke Nukem Forever 1:31:45 Bionic Commando 1:36:01 Letter of the Week 1:36:31 Infamous 1:40:15 E3 2009 Hype Massacre 1:44:00 Prototype 1:47:47 The Sims 3 1:51:39 Ghostbusters: The Video Game 1:55:30 Overlord 2 1:59:20 Red Faction Guerrilla 2:03:11 Wii Sports Resort 2:06:48 Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood 2:11:03 Theme Song Time! 2:12:10 The Conduit 2:16:12 Silent Hill 2 2:20:27 2.5D Hoedown 2:24:23 Tales of Monkey Island 2:28:12 Wolfenstein 2:31:59 Batman: Arkham Asylum 2:36:07 Beatles Rock Band and Guitar Hero 5 2:40:13 Darkest of Days 2:44:29 Scribblenauts 2:48:33 Wet 2:52:33 Mario and Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story 2:56:47 Brutal Legend 3:00:49 Games Expo Video Journal 3:07:00 Uncharted 2: Among Thieves 3:10:50 Dragon Age: Origins 3:14:56 Winners of the Stonking Great Game Contest 3:16:08 COD: Modern Warfare 2 3:19:56 Assassin's Creed 2 3:24:11 Left 4 Dead 2 and New Super Mario Bros Wii 3:28:30 Demon's Souls 3:32:42 Holiday Announcement 3:32:56 Saboteur

[@frelted6744]

you're great even if you dont get appreciated enough.

[@KORTOKtheSTRONG]

thx

[@sharkkebunni]

Thank you

[@ryanogrady893]

You even got Pedigree Chum

[@Atomsk2]

What a pro lol

[@VashMaverick09]

Rewatching this post everything happening makes me realize how long I've been watching and loving this strange strange man

[@subtlewhatssubtle]

It's almost cute how he thought so many franchises had hit rock bottom back in 2009. How far we had yet to fall.

[@Kyleology]

1:58:30

[@azzzanadra]

some came back up, don't pretend that the rock bottomers are the only ones that inhabit advanced darkness region.

[@Zukoiu]

@@timokampwerth1996 this is an understatement. Holy crap...

[@anierikidemona]

Not so cute now...

[@damiancrowley569]

@@anierikidemona ^^^^^^I'm with this guy

[@andrewgutmann9432]

1:07:24 “I’m not against violence, I’m against censorship.” Well that’s good because the irony of that statement in this video is physically painful.

[@tinyman1144]

Yeah funny how he mentions being against censorship in several reviews and the escapist insists on censoring lots of jokes throughout these year releases

[@KristoKorps]

@@CallanElliott citation please?

[@Arto257]

@@KristoKorps I'll back him up. I complained about it in one of their community post and their PR guy - whose name I forget - mentioned it was for advertising revenue. In fact you can just look at KZbin's content creator guidelines if you want a good laugh. The censorship is so blatant I'm amazed they're still getting away with it.

[@pivoteer556]

@@Arto257 They're getting away with it because they make the rules and can make them whatever they want. This isn't the house of representatives. You're not allowed to say fuck on NBC because NBC doesn't want people saying fuck on NBC.

[@Arto257]

@@pivoteer556 yeah, yeah, I know. Private company and all that nonsense. Doesn't change the fact that their creator guidelines are fucking ridiculous. It essentially gives KZbin absolute free reign to demonetise or even outright remove any content they deem inappropriate. Not even just swearing or sexual content - talking about certain *topics* isn't allowed. War, for example. Can't mention it, or you make no money. That's _the example_ they give in their guidelines - "war." Conflict. Anything that anyone might possibly take offence to or have a contentious opinion about. It's absolute bullshit, and you can't just hand-wave something like that away with "well, they make the rules"

[@greenredblue]

Fun fact: deleting the gay joke that concludes 1:51:33 makes that sequence seem sincere and thus way _more_ offensive. Honestly what is the point of all the censorship...

[@kingmorgan5047]

to avoid lawsuits. probably the same reason they changed the music on the bit with the googly-eyed butt dancing. it was originally the austin powers theme music.

[@killpuddle9977]

@@kingmorgan5047 yeah but the original is probably still the same

[@watchface6836]

Probably in an attempt to have the video monetized

[@HellionSeeker]

A joke that is looked back upon and recognized as offensive and cut out is entirely appropriate. A joke comes from a place of insincerity but taking a situation and making humor out of it. In hindsight going back and deleting it seems like a gesture of accepting that it wasn't okay.

[@greenredblue]

@@HellionSeeker That doesn't make any sense, especially in this context. They deleted an incidental, nonjudgmental allusion to homosexuality, that was supposed to juxtapose the preceding genuinely hateful mysoginistic screed. The joke was _supposed_ to be at the expense of the kind of people who would genuinely be that hateful. By cutting out the end, they made him seem genuinely hateful. Or, to make this simple: I'm a gay man. The gay joke was not even remotely offensive. There was no reason to cut it out... Unless the mere mention of homosexuality is to be interpreted as offensive. I think you can see why that alone would be problematic. But really, the now apparently-sincere mysogyny is worse.

[@Nymphonomicon]

Never let a man with an undying love for true survival horror games put googly eyes on his pants.

[@anonymone453]

That turd in a turd accolade for Sonic turned out to be timeless. He could've written that for any Sonic game that's come out since and for the most part it would be true.

[@nicholasbruns6593]

I put this playlist on a lot while I work. Every time I hear his "origin story" with ps2 red faction I smile. I smile because I went through that exact same situation. Now, Yahtzee is a internet celeb with 5 novels, several games, and over a decade's worth of content under his belt. While I am living in an rv in the Mojave Wasteland trying to learn c# and unity to make a f2p game that doesn't make my soul leave me too.

[@rakuraku4066]

So did you make that game ?

[@technocarp]

Doctor: You only have 3 hours 37 minutes and 14 seconds left to live Me: Oddly specific for a medical professional

[@lnsflare1]

Doctor: Oh, that wasn't a diagnosis. That's just how much is left on the timer. Maybe you should take the time to reconsider screwing my wife, huh?

[@TheReZisTLust]

Me: wow everyone says that huh...

[@brennanwn]

@@lnsflare1 Damn 😲

[@AlmightyPolarBear]

What if you have a day to live?

[@oskartheguy2105]

Me: ...I had you castrate me last week... How could I have screwed her?!?

[@predetor911]

Listen to someone talk for three and a half hours without taking a single breath has never been more entertaining.

[@davidrobichaux9073]

I'll never get over how much Yhatzee looks like someone you'd never let your kids near on his DC visit

[@Gilhelmi]

I enjoy listening to these in the background. It is like listening to the history of videogames from the last decade.

[@themagalanium9491]

my thoughts exactly, and with a dose of nostalgia no less

[@DKannji]

20:17 Wow, that joke truly fell flat when played with new age royalty free techno music... Makes me want to dig up the original videos just to see the jokes intact.

[@HarryBillyBobGeorge]

The E3 episode: [mentions Metal Gear Rising] Me: that didn’t cone out for several more years! [mentions The Last Guardian which came out like last year, after Kinect was already dead]

[@FoxDenCrafts]

lol

[@azalearichardson9113]

That wolfenstine limerick was impressive

[@FortressWolf97]

I love his accent changes from English to New Zealand to occasionally Australian depending on how he's feeling.

[@foxtailedcritter]

A man of true talent. I can barely speak my own accent yet he's pulling off many.

[@jordanj809]

3:01:30 it's really interesting to see Nick outside of his position of authority as Editor in Chief of all of Escapist. Almost makes me want to follow his career as it led up to today

[@boonsaplenty3924]

Ahahahaha funny that

[@insolencestar]

there's no one like yahtz to paralyse you with laughter after all these years..! "chest high wall sight-seeing tour" has me crippled

[@wizzardoffuzz]

the 50 cent review is my absolute favourite one he's ever done but its really hamstrung when you cut out the final joke.

[@Zukoiu]

Gotta love that American censoring.

[@isabellamorris7902]

@@BobExcalibur It's KZbin censoring so the Escapist can keep putting ads on these videos. Lately he's been having to literally replace all swears with KZbin

[@chronicbrightside8757]

escapist has mentioned if it was up to them, they wouldnt have censored any of it (and indeed you can still go back and watch the original video uncensored) but to keep the compilations monetizable, youtube required certain jokes had to be cut. and i believe it - there are way more offensive jokes that were left in. leave it to a massive, corporate-run, algorithm-obsessed mass like youtube to abritrarily deem a handful of jokes "too offensive" while completely ignoring nuance and context.

[@connorbishop5870]

​@@KrodaStagg He is not Australian

[@johnwrath3612]

@@KrodaStagg oh my god, he wants to pay his rent. What a hypocrite.

[@13Hyrule]

"A society where everyone can make jokes about everyone else and everyone laughs is a truly tolerant society. Political correctness charged censorship only serves to engender resentment and distance between social groups." Yahtzee 2009

[@butelthomas2503]

kinda ironic because he got censored in this video

[@seanurbik2689]

"....... In a perfect world. But we don't live in a perfect world. We live in a shitty world, where all the [atrocities of the last 400 years, "the effects of which still linger to this day"] and as such ......." -Moviebob 20xx

[@Rebellions]

@@seanurbik2689 yeah but Moviebob is a complete tool so...

[@seanurbik2689]

@@Rebellions Even if that were true, that doesn't change the fact that this isn't a perfect world.

[@patchwurk6652]

@@seanurbik2689 And it's never going to be. And it's not going to become better through censorship and morality-policing.

[@anemoi6803]

You know what's fascinating? Its pretty easy to see how much Yahtzee has changed in the past 11 years. I'd argue he's managed to kick the really low hanging fruit jokes and stay funny and for that I respect him. Not that he's above knob gags but they're more of a stocking stuffer than his actual best jokes

[@stevenskul]

they cut out almost all of his actually offensive jokes

[@HonkeyKongLive]

I've grown to love his really absurd jokes or off kilter references

[@satans_scrilla4844]

Edgy Yahtzee was best Yahtzee.

[@vapid6311]

that "It's as similar to the original article as an unwiped arsecrack is to a picture of gorbachev." was his best joke hands down

[@SerpentStare]

@Panel Deepak Not completely. They definitely clipped out the ironic racist joke at the end of the anti-racist ending on 50 Cent: Blood On the Sand, and I noticed.

[@Buretsu]

Escapist probably thinks we wouldn't notice that they cut out the punchline from the end of the "50 Cent: Blood on the Sand" review. Shame on them!

[@zoedorrahm]

Llaaaame.

[@Kody-mo3fy]

What was the punchline? They cut something else out in the last one too. Think it was something about hitler

[@RFLCPTR]

@@Kody-mo3fy He used the N-Word in a joking context.

[@Buretsu]

@@GeorgeTsiros This video doesn't even get that far. It ends before getting to the "Not that they'd know anything about work" bit.

[@PiccadillyBlue]

They also stickered eyes onto the Chinese zookeeper.

[@zackgilmore2504]

It's odd that the 50 Cent section where he rants about censorship is itself censored.

[@cuttlefishn.w.2705]

He doesn't even say the full word but, like my mulatto friend, chops it in half.

[@zackgilmore2504]

@@cuttlefishn.w.2705 I cannot say how deep my chuckle was reading that.

[@OldManJ3nkins]

It's sad. The Escapist actually replied to someone complaining about the censoring on one of the videos, something to the effect of "we have to pay our staff so we can't afford to have values like you can" or some bullshit.

[@Electric0eye]

That's producers

[@zackgilmore2504]

​@@OldManJ3nkins That statement hits very different now, given Yatz and so many other escapist creators leaving.

[@RegretfulDeadMan]

The ammount of censored jokes is insulting, frankly

[@CyanLink]

Some don't even make any sense. In the Velvet Assassin review he makes a joke about Valkeria Chronicles "defending the 100 acre woods from mean old farmer Hitler". The part about "mean old farmer Hitler" is cut out and I can't figure out why.

[@tate3117]

They were probably hoping to keep these videos monetized, considering the amount of mid roll ads

[@WeeNiallism]

This is really upsetting. The gaps are all I can hear.

[@backlogbuddies]

@@tate3117 the original uncensored videos still get ads

[@fg6186]

Mid role? I didn't have one in any of these. Does anyone know if Yathzee himself cuts the yokes out or somebody else?

[@charlenebaganzmoore]

What makes me laugh is is 'opinion' on children considering he has one now! Time makes fools of us all 🤣🤣🤣

[@blackrazor1000]

Got 3 hours, 37 minutes, 14 seconds of free time? Here's the perfect video for you!

[@destroyercreater98]

BlackRazor1000 what if it buffers

[@Atomsk2]

Destroyer Creater pray that it doesn’t

[@destroyercreater98]

DNoah then I’ll pray until Jesus himself comes down and say “dude. You need to chill on your praying”

[@DancinDane]

It feels so surreal hearing Yahtzee talking about how basically allright Gears of War is 😳

[@the1flym459]

I love watching back his review of Dragon Age because you know he hadn't reached the Broodmother because otherwise he would've spent half the review talking about it

[@thefoxogaming4092]

and it can go fuck off

[@RebelTaxi]

Give us a 4K remaster of old reviews

[@ChaosTheoryDrozz]

Might as well skip to 16K

[@WOLF36554]

it's funny that yahtzee has been doing this three year longer than you and still you are the one that stagnated while yahtzee remained good.

[@weegle.]

@@WOLF36554 you didn't need to murder him...even if it's completely true...

[@frelted6744]

WOLF36554 oucccch i felt that and i dont even know who that is.

[@qdllc]

Why? So the PC Master Race is rendered in even more resplendent detail?

[@themrfives]

"No franchise has been euthanized quite as well as metal gear solid." Honestly it would've been better if that happened after five, considering where we are now.

[@daniellado2523]

Konami will probably not even touch that franchise for a very long time. Heck, any franchise in fact.

[@shayanali9141]

You want to hear a sad thing? Yatzhees voice has been the voice i listen to for most of my day,like more than my parents. Seriously i listen to his videos that much that his is the most consistent voice i hear.

[@Changetheling]

Same here. Hardly listen to music anymore. Or sleep in silence for that matter.

[@SerpentStare]

fwiw, his enunciation and delivery has a great flow, so I wouldn't consider it one of the worse voices to get stuck in your head.

[@fntthesmth423]

To be fair most people in our lives wouldn't be willing or even able to sit down and deliver 3+ straight hours of continuous speech. This is probably something people said about DJs back at the dawn of radio, since it was the first time people had access to so much audio content! So don't feel bad that you don't have your parents' voices memorized like a youtuber's :)

[@42Mrgreenman]

@@fntthesmth423 Yeah, I suspect that the communication revolution changed much more about "Human nature" than we understand...the shear amount of information is unprecedented...but also that information can be "Siloed" and manipulated in multiple ways makes me worry about the future...as our biological brains can't keep up with the massive processing power of purely analytical computers...not saying it'll be something like Skynet, but it will be someone manipulating technology to control or destroy the world...

[@adamkimmel2306]

Damn it Yahtzee what have you done! Im never gonna get work done!

[@Shaymin0]

I personally force myself to put it in a hidden tab or else i would get nothing done.

[@Commy01]

The Escapist's Overlords really done fucked up.

[@AlmightyPolarBear]

We need to get Yahtzee to cover every game whether it came out that year or years ago. He makes them all worth listening to.

[@AftermathRV]

2:25:00 WHY Did i miss this irish yahtzee joke for years. WHAT ELSE DID I MISS

[@Kirbyterasu]

20:17 Aw man, I forgot Yahtzee showed his face that year!

[@oskartheguy2105]

...I am aroused in the weirdest way...

[@jonlee2553]

Escapist changed the music too. It was that little ditty from Austin Powers.

[@lolnamelollastname9788]

@@jonlee2553 Yes, I noticed that! Probably to escape copyright?

[@Zman9042]

47:25 YOU CUT OUT THE BEST PART. THAT PART HAD ME DYING LAUGHING FOR DAYS WTF

[@lionguardant5468]

it wasn’t that funny…

[@ThePa1riot]

Jesus so many of these jokes were trimmed. Which is cruelly ironic after Yahtzee makes a very apt point about such things in the 50 Cent review

[@JigAtTheFuneral]

Silly yahtzee, being invisible only whilst playing the trombone is exactly what I'd want

[@kylewhite9383]

Without punctuation, but no ads 👍 not complaining really, Yhatz makes it worth it. 😂

[@Lunaticranial]

@@thewraithwriter22 That's your loss

[@JustBeingAlive]

I just bingewatch your vids anyway. Soooo this is just what I need ;)

[@finnthecoach16]

Chan? Nice zu sehen das du auch ein Mann der hohen kulturellen Standarts bist👌🏻

[@mr.j7444]

listening to his demons souls review is hilarious given how hard he has it for darksouls.

[@CodingItWrong]

"Maybe by the end of the third game we'll be controlling a big pile of giblets and teeth." No Yahtz you'll need to wait for Carrion (2020) for that.

[@akirakomaeda8781]

"It´s wort remembering that sometimes things are pupular for a reason: because they're good" Fucking preach it mate

[@Tr0ttingF0x]

It's wonderful to watch these and see not only how games have evolved, but how Yahtzee has evolved as well. In the Bowser's inside story review, he talks about how much he hates children. And he's a dad now. It's cute. :)

[@icarussbungeecord7779]

time to directly download pure snark directly into my brain

[@Flabulo]

"Eventually I started avoiding optional combat missions. When you come across 15 muggings while headed home through the New York warzone its hard to feel you're making an impact on crime." Yahtzee predicted 2022 New York!

[@harmless3449]

Why is his mic quality better in 2009 than it was in 2010-2013 lol

[@kemestia592]

Christ they cut out jokes again, these compilations are great but this is annoying as all hell.

[@jelleschoenmaker3956]

Dude don't drag us SJWs into this

[@patrickbeart7091]

@Ex Tyger I'm opposed to them removing it as well but the fact that they removed the n word is not exactly indicative of them being an SJW

[@TomatoBreadOrgasm]

@@jelleschoenmaker3956 Could you tell them to stop shoving themselves into everything? Thanks.

[@jelleschoenmaker3956]

We're not. We've always been here

[@mattheweakin6802]

@@TomatoBreadOrgasm Actual ESS-JAY-DABLUS are vastly outnumbered by, and less annoying than, twats who scream ESS-JAY-DABLU at every shadow. This video for instance; The escapist didn't remove the edgy jokes because they're secretly run by a shadowy cabal of blue-haired gender-studies majors. If they were ideologically motivated, they'd take down the original 50 cent review, wouldn't they. They selectively edited this it because KZbin's algorithm for demonetisation is sensitive to certain words. The motivation is financial, not ideological. Not that that stops the twats from yelling ESS-JAY-DABLU, because that's their all-purpose explanation for everything they don't like.

[@ally4800]

2009, the year of the limerick review. The height of my attraction to yatzee...

[@maddawgmcgee]

They cut out the "not that they know anything about work the stupid ni..." line out of the end of the 50 cent review

[@mattiasmartens9972]

Thanks, I do remember thinking the lack of vitriol there was a bit jarring.

[@phenomanII]

They also cut out the "Incidentaly I'm still not gay" part from the end of the Sims review (1:51:39)

[@screamsinrussian5773]

Hmm, cutting out all the good shit... Wonder what might have caused it

[@patrickwilliams7695]

cut the 'and also possibly some child pornography' line from wii sports resort

[@CaptainNuge]

The ellipsis would be punctuation, so they clearly had to cut it.

[@theleikkuri]

I love bingelistening zero punctuation while playing the entire assassin's creed series again and again

[@adriantepesut]

This exact combination is my main source of both nostalgic comfort and existential dread Listen to Yahtzee at the same time as ac II Monteriggionni ambient music and try not to reminder how you will die

[@ThatFanBoyGuy]

""A society where anyone can make jokes about anyone else and everyone laughs is a truly tolerant society. Political-correctness-charged censorship only serves to engender resentment and distance between social groups." -Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw, "Zero Punctuation" (2009) Put that on a motivational poster

[@jkjk00222]

as they censor the end of the video

[@HarryBillyBobGeorge]

59:00 I want a feature-length version of this.

[@PeterTheRock3]

20:17 Noooo! He changed the music (likely copyright)

[@kylejscheffler]

I know, I've seen the original so often that it really caught me off guard

[@spacebear4742]

PeterTheRock3 they kept the music for 21:53

[@jimnicholas7334]

The problem with zero punctuation is that it's extremely obvious when you censor a joke.

[@Changetheling]

...or perhaps that's its strength. not like the average people in internet would ever ponder about it.

[@aztn19]

@Horus SC besides, it’s not as if the original reviews were edited or taken down. They can still see them to get their fix on hearing inappropriate slurs sprinkled into their video game critiques.

[@ginko2692]

I'm impressed he managed to get Matthew Mattosis to guest on the Monkey Island episode. Also anyone else hear the police coming to get yahtzee at 10:53? And 26:25

[@hasanz7585]

clever reference lmao

[@dakotamcintire7419]

After seeing yahtzees roadtrip footage, K now need a whole series following this man across the world XD that, or let him narrate a nature documentory just once.

[@mozxz]

If he got to narrate a nature documentary, then he would have ample opportunity to talk about various animal dicks, in context for once.

[@Ddarkan]

@ 2:47:46 Hmmm... wasn't there a 3rd part to that joke? Out of all the other things said during Zero Punctuation I wonder why they decided to retcon that joke specifically.

[@Zman9042]

6 views. 8 likes. The sorcery on display is amazing.

[@munkyzzb7504]

That usually happens when there's a lot of vampires watching.

[@skeletor3703]

Wow the fucking nostalgia I used to run from highschool to see it as soon as it was out :D thank you Yahtzee, still my go to game reviewer after all this time ^^

[@Yggdrasill-X]

*Dies hearing Yatz say "glock of Damocles" xDD

[@potahtwah9591]

I sometimes forget that thick means stupid outside America. For a second I thought he was saying the Gow aliens had cake.

[@Tzen03]

Wow, I don't remember Graham Stark trying to cover for Yahtzee! That was hilarious.

[@myrixica4222]

It was after he joined them on an unskippable

[@humblegamertube]

The finest moment in gaming history is the Duke Nukem Forever Review.

[@TheDocperian]

It's so weird to randomly hear Grahm at 52:00 The shit that happened over a decade ago

[@eleanorfudge7288]

So I've watched basically every ZP review (I'll admit, I was surprised to find I hadn't seen the GTA: Chinatown Wars reviews until this compilation), and earlier on, I thought I noticed some odd editing quirks - like where it sounded as though Yahtzee was mid-rant but was suddenly cut-off into another sentence. Like you could just tell the tone/cadence of his voice had changed. But it wasn't until 01:47:29 that I was absolutely sure something fishy was going on, because it's one of my favorite reviews (Prototype) and one of favorite jokes ends with the "...eat them, too!" - so of course I'm well acquainted with the following line, "...if only Jeffrey Dahmer..." but that's when the video cut immediately to the "Conclusion", rather than the next line and I was instantly put-off. I don't understand it, is it a timeliness issue? I've heard some things about the whole KZbin "watch time" algorithm or something like that. I went looking in the comments for everyone else's take and saw some people saying that it's censorship but if that's the case, why bother when the videos still exist - easily accessible - in their original forms? Either way, this is a poor way to do business. There are still ads - essentially just as many as I tend to see when I watch the videos individually one after the other - and while it's nice not to have to skip through the (preposterously loud) opening theme and not have to pick the next episode from the random options offered up by KZbin's (frankly dogshit) algorithm, I don't like knowing that I'm being robbed of the creator's original intent. I come here to watch (read: mostly listen to in the background while doing other things) Yahtzee's Zero Punctuation, not some boiled-down Escapist-filtered malarkey. I know this is technically boiled-down because the opening theme and ending credits have been lifted out in order to streamline the experience and that's appreciated - cause if you're binge-watching, it helps a lot if they just roll into each other, one after another. But the compilation video says it's "Zero Punctuation with no punctuation" - it DOES NOT mention anything about "also we've cut out some of the actual content, too". I'm sincerely disappointed. This will be fine for when I'm falling into a drunken coma, it will no longer suffice for actually experiencing Zero Punctuation and honestly, I'm surprised Yahtzee is okay with it (although, at this point, as he's said he gets paid surprisingly well for this gig, I really can't blame him for having a "fuck bitches, get money" attitude).

[@endothegreatthief4432]

it's cliche in this comment section to say "they censored jokes" but you made a goddamn essay you EARNED it

[@ahennessy7998]

I think it's to do with monetization. If this compilation with all of the jokes included were released it would be demonetised fairly quickly and they wouldn't know what caused it, because while you can get away with one risky joke in each individual video, you can't do the same with a big compilation such as this, as one risky joke turns into forty, and instead of trying to play whack a mole with the algorithm the escapist decided to remove the jokes altogether

[@42Mrgreenman]

Perhaps my favorite sentence by Yahtzee, "Silent Hill 4 mis-stepped so hard it's femurs burst out of it's legs and rocketed into the sky." Damn, I loved SH4...but yeah, so much jank...no sidestepping in the apartment, those annoying flying bug-bat things, super limited inventory, having to knock down all those penis plants over and over again in the water prison, and the water prison...

[@FirlowXD]

Funny to think he still thought Half-Life 3 might be coming out at some point...

[@shrimpboom8]

the velvet assassin review had me tabbing back and forth between the original video and this every time the scene changed because I'd assumed there was another censored joke

[@malachichampion]

Oh glob I didn't realize KZbin was still set to 2x when I came back to this

[@Changetheling]

2009 was the "What Arbitrary Silliness" year. Good times.

[@shiv3rcubesolver664]

I may have been just about to fall asleep when the spooky ambience hit and I most shat myself.

[@Denseus]

I have been on a journey thanks to this video So I had just got to the “John Sterling” email after fake Duke Nukem review I googled the name as it rang a bell and ended up clicking on a link to the escapist forums, I was reading reactions to that very ZP video from 11 years ago and saw that a fair number of these posters had been banned in the past decade. Fun thing about the Escapist forums is in many cases they link the thread that got the user banned I read this rage argument between two people 11 years ago who both seemed to be Sony fans but were each accusing the other of irrationally hating Sony I felt moved to post, 11 years later, but of course the thread had long since been locked, to prevent necroing of course. So I posted here, I wonder if in 11 years somebody will reply to this odd little comment on a KZbin video watched by a nerd during the chaotic year of 2020 If you do... Hello 2031, did it all turn out ok in the end?

[@armoredwendigo8503]

bold of you to assume there will be a 2031.

[@AveGluteusMaximus]

Fantastic comment. Would read again in a decade 🎩

[@Meloncarty]

I just realized you can hear Police Sirens in the Skate review

[@colonelkassad16]

Hands down, 2009 was his best year.

[@hasanz7585]

2010 and 2011 are up there too

[@HonkeyKongLive]

I love that they had to change the music for his butt eyes because it was copyrighted.

[@MultiZ100]

Doctor: You have 3 hours 37 minutes and 14 seconds to live Me:

[@Asaski09]

THEY CUT OUT THE BEST BIT

[@vjollila96]

high quality shit for over 14 years

[@MURFGAMING1228]

People are complaining about them censoring jokes in these compilations. The 9 Mid-roll adds show why they did that.

[@patchwurk6652]

...But the original videos (Which are completely un-edited) are still monetized. And they leave in quite a few jokes which are still pretty damn raunchy (i.e. Damn near every analogy Yahtzee makes).

[@MURFGAMING1228]

@@patchwurk6652 In that case, I have no idea.

[@oddfoxx_]

3:03:30 The Statue of Freedom is a 19 ft 6 in bronze statue that sits on top of the United States Capitol dome. The statue faces east and overlooks the central entrance. It depicts a female figure in classical dress, a toga-like robe, and a helmet with an eagle's head and feathers. She holds a laurel wreath and the shield of the United States, which has 13 stripes. The statue's pedestal is 18.5 ft tall and has a globe on top. The pedestal's lower part is decorated with wreaths and fasces, and it has the motto "E pluribus unum" ("Out of many, one").

[@oddfoxx_]

🥹🇱🇷🏴‍☠️🇺🇸💪💓💯

[@ayylmao8562]

He loves half these games nowadays, he hypes up GTA IV a lot, especially the story.

[@solsingularity106]

Hey, Yahtzee, from the year 2021; I think Godzilla vs Kong was partly conjured by 'Nancy Drew Meets Mecha-Godzilla'. So thanks for that.

[@Betta66]

They took out the last joke in Blood on the Sand? Odd choice

[@MrDylanm842]

I was 7 years old when these were made. It’s times like these I realise you really are just a grumpy old man

[@AdrianColley]

22:17 review of _Thief_ (yes, the one from the 20th century).

[@MisterTTG]

his fuckin pisstake south african accent slipping in and out throughout the entire Far Cry 2 review slays me

[@tooyaigarashi5054]

Hey wait a minute people are making videos of multiple zero punctuations in them, with no punctuation? Why did we never do that!

[@TheReZisTLust]

You mean a playlist of sorts?

[@sin21ful]

It’s been being done for years. A guy names Felman08 used to do it and had the reviews ordered by year and even letter.

[@GruesomeFeatures]

Can't believe they cut the last joke from the 50 cent game review. Genuinely made me choke the first time i heard it

[@adammuir5130]

Nice that Matthewmatosis joined for the Monkey Island Review. I like knowing my favourite reviewers hang out

[@The4thSnake]

Guys, seriously. If you're going to be this obvious about censoring certain words (cutting him off mid-sentence), you may as well not bother including the review at all.

[@agreen182]

First Friday of every month is now a holiday. 👏👏escapist👏👏

[@d-x-v-i]

horrifying to realise I am now the age Yahtzee was when he was doing these videos.

[@AdrianColley]

2:33 for the therapeutic leeching that GTA4 urgently required.

[@SirSicCrusader]

I'm always glad to have something to waste 3 and a half hours of my pointless life in one nice convenient chunk.

[@bobthop]

Yahtz, it’s 2019 my friend

[@StormArmy96]

Why are some of them cut down? "Some children you intend to molest" has been cut down to just the first 2 words for some reason

[@GoodnightMoon4]

I tend to listen to these as I go to sleep ( I know ). I hate this video so much because once 21:54 rolls around shit wakes me up every time lol

[@Jesse__H]

I really wish y'all would just take a bit and put a couple seconds of black screen between each video. Watching these can honestly get confusing sometimes, when there's less of a pause between episodes than there is between Yahtzee's sentences!

[@lolihitler4198]

but that would imply punctuation

[@TheReZisTLust]

Taking a pause in between sentences is called a comma I think you should leave English Teacher in disguise i see you trying to teach

[@Jesse__H]

@@TheReZisTLust I actually am an English teacher 😗 so you caught me, I guess...