Everyone Everywhere Needs Waymond Wang (and Ke Huy Quan)

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Everything Everywhere All At Once is a genre bending multiverse movie but it's also one of the most challenging and subversive representations of masculinity I’ve ever seen in any genre.
**It's best to watch the movie first and then come back and watch this :)
***Please note: this movie contains some strobe effects
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REFERENCES
• Ke Huy Quan returns in front of the camera
www.wbur.org/hereandnow/2022/...
• Asian Men Needed a Movie Like Everything Everywhere All at Once
slate.com/culture/2022/04/eve...
• The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity
us.macmillan.com/books/978037...
SUBTITLES
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TEXT TRANSCRIPT
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COMMENTS
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FAIR USE
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VIDEO LINK FOR EDUCATORS
• Coming soon
CREDITS
Writer/Editing: Jonathan McIntosh
Outro music: Rick Lopez

[@lazerNeo]

One of the things I really fucking loved about Waymond is that at the beginning of the movie we're led to think that Alpha Waymond was the best version of him, but as it turns out the best version of him was with Evelyn all along.

[@claudiocontrerasgomez2949]

And maybe that´s why that Evelyn was the "Chosen one".

[@EliSprague]

@@claudiocontrerasgomez2949 This is what I've come to as well - The movie focused on some really great female leads, but at the end of the movie it comes down to what I feel is the duo of a wonderfully balanced relationship, and the called out just how different those can be. Dealing with Jobu wasn't possible without the right Evelyn, but the right Evelyn wasn't possible without the right Waymond either, and Waymond had this beautiful tenacity of a caring man. It's a wonderful turn on "Behind every great man is a woman" in a very positive way for both parties.

[@fuzzb0y]

Because no matter what success he achieved alone, he’d rather spend the rest of his life with Evelyn doing laundry and taxes. Ugh, I’m ugly crying now

[@frostfang1]

Probably why she is the best Evelyn.

[@tamegaming1768]

Exactly. I feel like the movie was saying the old Evelyn didn't deserve him, having him with the divorce papers

[@kmym5709]

"I'm trying to fight like you" really broke me, in the best way possible.

[@Shindai]

This film just kept blowing me away, best thing I've seen in years, epic feels

[@malonshammer]

I've seen this 8 times and a few video essays about it, every time that lines gets shown I tear up a little.

[@AmiyaD1611]

@@malonshammer I literally teared up when I just read the comment . oh man, this movie really impacted me on a soul level, and will continue to influence me for a looooong while.

[@gorgeous8821]

Me too. That was the first time I cried when watching the movie.

[@leonkuwata4510]

*Learning to fight like you

[@carameldarling2980]

I noticed that there's a point in the movie where she gets disappointed every time alpha waymond leaves and her waymond comes back (for example when alpha waymond dies in his universe and her husband comes back she sighs). Quite literally, alpha waymond represents the alpha male (macho, confident, takes control and is dominant). Evelyn represents many women who have been sold the idea that this is the pinnacle of masculinity and that anything other is weak and underserving of respect. Alpha waymond was inconsistent, impatient and at times cocky. Waymond was consistent, loving, patient and humble. It's only when she changed her perspective on him that she finally saw his worth and could cherish him in the way he deserved. This movie is really about perspective. When she changed her perspective on her own life, on her daughter, her father and husband, everything fell into place.

[@goyam2981]

Asian females back at that time, and I think this is true for Western females as well, wanted to marry someone they could depend on. Evelyn is assuming a role she didn't dream of.

[@DreiiFernandes]

I mean this was the way it was for who knows how long, society is different now but there are still a lot of people who prefer these traits

[@annettebray6694]

​@@goyam2981 A small detail I noticed that I absolutely loved was when alpha Waymond first meets with her in the closet, he forcefully grabs her and pulls her back and she sort of gives him a lustful look and pushes back her hair. We see her do it again when she realises she loves Waymond as he is, she gives him a more loving look and pushes her hair back.

[@dontedonefn1568]

best comment i ever seen

[@NunyaBizness2.0]

I love this comment. I thought the same thing. She didn’t appreciate or respect Waymond because he was goofy, didn’t take himself serious or let problems get him down. His approach to problem solving was humor and lightheartedness (such as when he danced with the angry customer). Evelyn seemed to be constantly annoyed with him and perhaps viewed him as immature (she asks IRS lady what her silly husband said to her) Then in that scene where he explained that it’s his way of dealing with life’s problems (aka how he fights) she realizes that he’s actually very strong and capable, thus her attraction to him is renewed and she follows his lead. Their kiss in the lobby was a beautiful scene and the actress did such a great job expressing her emotions with her eyes. Excellent movie all around

[@joannaniccitinafree9817]

“You think I’m weak, don’t you? When I choose to see the good side of things, I’m not being naïve. It is strategic and necessary. It’s how I’ve learned to survive through everything. This is how I fight.” ❤

[@Me97405]

❤

[@CheekiTiki]

My favorite line in the film, and tbh I had actually missed it on my first watch.

[@maiam4691]

I cried a lot during this move but I broke down completely during these lines

[@consciouswriter6531]

I sobbed. It was beyond affirming even though I am female. I can only imagine how it would feel as a male.

[@CheekiTiki]

@@consciouswriter6531 I think it's a message with mostly universal appeal but I get where you're coming

[@KhuestionableDecisions]

Waymond said the two most iconic lines in the movie “be kind, especially when you don’t know what’s going on” and “in another life, I would’ve loved to do laundry and taxes with you” - they always make me emotional 🥹

[@catalinadiaz7235]

It really freaking breaks my heart every time it’s just so pure and genuine too. Seeing this cinnamon roll even at the last moment trying to use empathy as weapon even when it seems too late, that is revolutionary.

[@blubirbeed4172]

EXACTLY

[@gunwooks_planet]

no cause the laundry and taxes line hit so hard -- the only moment in the movie where i genuinely teared up

[@catalinadiaz7235]

@@gunwooks_planet me too!! Every time

[@heartonface]

"in another life, I would’ve loved to do laundry and taxes with you" I cried from this point on all the way towards the end. How rare is it to actually find someone who genuinely would love you in every universe like

[@pvtpain66k]

"Even in a stupid, stupid universe where we have hotdogs for hands, we get very good _with our feet_ " I don't know why this line makes me cry

[@snakesnoteyes]

It’s radical optimism in a time when we desperately need hope.

[@polimana]

@@snakesnoteyes very tru

[@AsteroSloth]

It made me feel like good really exists everywhere. No matter how weird or gross, that goodness exists in everything.

[@SelphieFairy]

So much in this movie starts off seeming like a throwaway joke or line and then turns out to be actually serious and actually important to themes or plot.

[@samisfun868]

kinda like people with disability or born without a functioning hand or feet or can't walk - they would learn to get very good with other parts of their senses/body. means doesn't matter what you were born with, don't give up, you are best with something else.

[@CrimzinEclipse2010]

One of my favorite moments of the film is when Waymond tells Evelyn that, like her, he’s also a fighter. He just chooses to fight with kindness and positivity in a cruel and confusing world. It’s an incredibly uplifting message, and one which is all too rare in the modern world.

[@ebrennie]

Nearly all ancient mindfulness traditions share this view, and billions around the planet practice this philosophy today. Small acts of kindness are the things that truly matter.

[@andytinganyang4706]

@@ebrennie Yeah but I wasn’t convinced of that philosophy until I saw it in action embodied by Waymond.

[@jonathanzhang8870]

@@ebrennie Still, a lot of that thought, no matter how crucial it would be for more of it to be prevalent, becomes lost in the weeds and is worth celebrating when featured in such a starring role.

[@Disuke1]

I feel like where I watched it, that line wasnt translated well into English or my interpretation ability sucked. I was really confused but this comment helps. I think it mightve been translated as this is why I fight instead of this is how I fight.

[@TheBeezusjones]

That's right. His kindness IS strength and courage, not weakness.

[@Crybaby-Media]

This was how my dad fought. With kindness and patience and understanding. I will never forget that he taught me to be gentle . I found him passed away this week, and I am completely broken. Thanks dad and Waymond , for being true, gentle men.

[@kpepperl319]

My condolences to you and your family. Keep sharing that love and kindness... That's how your father will live on forever, through you and those who you share his stories with.

[@tab5470]

I'm so sorry for your lost. May the memories that you shared with him help you getting through the days ahead...

[@attilathenun]

Your dad sounds like an amazing person. May he continue to live through you as you pass his values and life lessons onto the next generation.

[@aurwood68]

My condoléances to you and your family.

[@kikib8434]

My dad was this way, too. He died almost 7 years ago. Sounds like we were lucky to have kickass dads. I am so, so sorry you lost yours. Sending you GIANT hugs and lots of love 🖤.

[@kaniphish]

As a guy I've almost cried when she finally recongnizes how hard Waymond is trying to make things work and how suffocating it is to keep being kind when all you get back is negativity. Him finally getting recognized for what an amazing person he is hits way harder than any scene where the loser finally punches the bully.

[@DarthZ01]

god that hug, the stress leaving him just so drained he can barely manage to even drop the broom and dustpan and just sinks into the hug. it was just so real, and so gratifying to finally see his relief.

[@ChimichangoBoom]

I'll admit I actually did when she was going through every memory with him, when he's just enjoying life and just enjoying being around her doing the most boring mundane things, and him just being goofy made me laugh through the tears lol

[@rakoongaming5535]

Almost cried? I definitely cried haha

[@martinlopatka4409]

Lucky you xD I cried through half of a movie xD

[@hungreebear]

yeah ngl this guy had me in tears when i watched this movie

[@vanderdendur4640]

Not only is the alpha-beta opposition useless for humans, David Mech, the scientist who coined the terms for wolf behaviour, eventually retracted his research because the alpha-beta opposition doesn't exist among free wolves (but occurs only in captivity) and spent his entire life trying to undue the damage of his previous research.

[@a_legitimate_salvage]

Sure did provide a handy justification for the constant struggle and abuse of capitalism though.

[@gayhomosexuallll]

@@a_legitimate_salvage "It's a dog-eat-dog world," like, leave dogs out of this!

[@NightspeakerR]

@@gayhomosexuallll The doggo just be there like "Humon what are you okay-"

[@JayGrapherTh]

and yet its a simplification of hierarchy of leaders and followers observable in various animals and to say its just doesnt exist because one researcher redacted the idea, doesnt make the meaning any less meaningful. How people use alpha has moved on from it's origin inception

[@tinaloye2014]

@@JayGrapherTh they are still using it in its original interpretation

[@kungfualex123]

Having just watched Barbie as a man and looking around the theatre and experiencing only what I could describe as generations of women feeling “seen” for the first time and completely breaking down, I was reminded of this video and of Waymond. Waymond and his portrayal in this movie is my “Barbie”.

[@surajganiger]

thank you i feel like this movie did a better job than what barbie was trying to do

[@danielp7394]

Bro, that movie hit me hard too. I'm honestly so happy I got to share it with my son

[@gen6375]

You, you totalt get it.

[@ethanspicer3471]

Like I hated most of the movie and I thought it was disappointing until I was hit with waymond’s “laundry and taxes” bro I almost cried

[@nuckinfutzsf822]

Bro, Ken absolutely eclipsed that movie. Where were you?

[@tigerpjm]

Waymond Wang : *"I know you are all fighting because you are scared and confused. I'm confused too. All day... I don't know what the heck is going on. But somehow... this feels like it's all my fault."* That line got me. He sees everyone fighting and trying to hurt each other, yet he gives them the benefit of the doubt that he won't give to himself.

[@keiganblaise9878]

It got me too, with a punch straight to the gut.

[@lukem5798]

Great observation that the audience feels bad for the technically successful version of Waymond. The idea that he ‘has it all’ but is missing out on ‘laundry and taxes’ is such an important message

[@donalvarito3165]

The importance of appreciating a regular day to day.

[@NathanielJordan85]

You'll never feel like a winner as long as you're playing society's broken game and not your own.

[@Gesepp95]

EEAaO makes a strong case for us to feel similarly about Evelyn, too. She has the more traditional character arc, learning the skill of empathy over the course of the movie. In that time, while she certainly makes use of skills from several versions of herself that have dedicated themselves to their careers and crafts, in the end it’s the connection with her daughter that makes success possible. Chef Evelyn, martial artist Evelyn, and actress Evelyn couldn’t hold a candle in true strength compared to laundry and taxes Evelyn. All Evelyns achieve personal success, but in the whole multiverse, the most important skill she could learn, the one necessary to save all the others from bagel nihilism, was how to be a supportive mother.

[@jjstarrprod]

@@Gesepp95 I love your take. It's true that when she starts all her level ups, it's mainly in the form of physical prowess (and violence). And we're all cheering for it coz' we've been programmed by movies ever since our childhood to accept that life is about the law of the strongest. And in typical shonen/superhero fashion, she goes at it all alone. Then Act 1 symbolically finishes with her death, how despites all her level up, she ended up failing her mission. Cut to credits and we're being told that's the end of the movie... Or actually, ONE end of the movie. Act 2 then starts, and this time, comes her true level up, the vision of the entire multiverse all at once, her being tempted by the Dark side of the Bagel, like her daughter, then experiencing her final true level up, the love and peace philosophy of Waymond, learning that even in the utter void of meaning of the multiverse, that shouldn't prevent you to go through it with kindness, to bring back some meaning and order and purpose to it, despites how fleeting it could be. And like in a videogame, it all happens in flashing multicolored lighting all over her and Waymond, signifying that she's now Mario Star invincible. And this time, she actually wins, not only by herself, but having been able to inspire and bring back together her whole family, even her dismissive judgmental father, which is the true miracle of the movie.

[@saukchung8939]

I don't think most people understand that money can buy "what you want", but not "what makes you happy". Being rich isn't necessarily a "good" thing.

[@michelletran8242]

I remember being absolutely gut-punched by my favourite line in the movie: "In another life, I would've loved just doing laundry and taxes with you." I was in tears before I even knew it. The way that Waymond holds value in mundane things that are MADE special by the relationships you create and the way you treat the people you care about; just shows what an meaningful character he is.

[@fqwgads]

Business Waymond had it all: success, confidence, attractiveness, money... yet he would have given it all up to live a simple life with the woman he loved

[@Alsetman]

Thanks for making me cry again, that line killed me.

[@thewaverlyjung]

literally whenever i think of this line i start tearing up

[@familiatrois3813]

That line of the movie by Succesful Waymond gets me with the Feels every time I see it!

[@franciscobrosfilms3524]

Gives me Goosebumps everytime

[@Sebisajiminstan]

This movie quite literally changed my life. I am very much a pessimist by nature, so it was, and is, incredibly easy for me to default to that type of world view where if nothing matters what’s the point of even trying. But Waymond’s approach to life made me realize that kindness matters. Even if nothing else does, improving ONE person’s day by simply being kind does matter. To that person and to me. So now my approach changed, and I’m trying to incorporate this mindset in my everyday life. And it does make my life a bit better, one day at a time. So I’m deeply grateful to this character, and the writers.

[@Donika691]

@@aaadesktop Your comment doesn't seem to match the op's comment. Not once did they mention their gender, and in no way does the comment give any insight into their life other than them having a pessimistic view, which doesn't say a lot because a lot of people are pessimistic. Unless you personally know more about this person, your comment makes no sense here.

[@aprilmh]

This was so beautiful and I'm so moved by your change of perspective. I hope it stays with you forever.

[@andimoz]

@@aaadesktop wtf are you on?

[@Sterkleton_]

can 100% relate to this with my battle with depression and anxiety. just putting myself out there, trying to be kind has bounced back onto me and it feels good. its crazy that just seeing a fictional character be so strong and yet so subversive. Its a breath of fresh air.

[@martinjugolin2087]

I don't find it so meaningful or life changing, its just like a marvel movie where the hero its like Jesus Christ, loving everyone and having a rainbow kind moment just sounds unrealistic

[@cccspwn]

I saw my dad in Waymond, and I am ashamed to admit that there are times I wasn’t proud of him. But understanding his mentality and seeing it portrayed on the big screen, I came to respect his patience, humility, and kindness so much more. My dad, like Raymond seeks to find solutions not fights, through kindness and understanding. Dad is so much stronger than I ever realized. These things I will adopt going forward.

[@martinjugolin2087]

Its not strength but emotional thinking. Dont be kind with evilness, theyll just take advantage. This is not fighting, more likely just failure

[@Dazumu]

​@@martinjugolin2087 🤓

[@nerovondoom6298]

Same here. It hits hard because I see him in the character.

[@hugnboba]

I want to have a dad like Waymond so bad :') mine is a textbook stuck-up asian who hates his life and takes it out on us. I feel like I'll slowly become like him so I really REALLY need these characters who I can look up to instead❤

[@ocinprofession]

@@martinjugolin2087 It is strength you've just never seen it in action. without the emotional thinking everyone would have a personal black slave.

[@bigmike4133]

It's kind of the inverse of Fight Club. Fighting a revolution against meaninglessness with empathy instead of violence.

[@rocketsocks]

Fight Club is a critique/deconstruction/parody of that whole concept. But like so many such things (Starship Troopers, RoboCop, The Watchmen movie, the American Psycho movie, etc.) our society is so twisted and poisoned that these over the top parodies come off as full throated exaltations of the thing they are trying to parody. It's incredibly hard to thread that needle.

[@The_Jovian]

@@rocketsocks well. I wouldn't give Snyder too much credit by saying the Watchmen movie is definitely a parody.

[@snakesnoteyes]

@@The_Jovian The Watchmen graphic novel was absolutely a critique, but you’re right about the movie - removed all of the imagery that made the graphic novel a parody/critique to just frame the characters in classic heroic tones both visually and narratively. I only specify in order to forestall the argument that I’m unfamiliar with the comic you’re replying to.

[@polmak9176]

Postmodern vs metamodern

[@YourBlackLocal]

@@rocketsocks I don’t know how you ended up with Watchmen movie as a parody, it’s as in line with Zack Snyder as a film can get. The comic sure.

[@null9090]

Masculinity without the foundation of insecurity is so important to promote. It is really depressing to talk to men who reveal that their entire worldview is founded on fear (of being perceived as weak), and so they over-perform toughness and think that this makes them strong.

[@giraffelangenek398]

What do you mean with masculinity without insecurity? Being insecure is completely normal, which everyone experiences to some degree. It’s managing our insecurities without being harmful to ourselves and others that is a far more helpful and actionable aim. Not a demonization of insecurity in men in favor of some new ideal of confidence, which is just a repackaging of already existing idealizations of masculinity as hyper confident and self controlled.

[@Appletank8]

@@giraffelangenek398 It might be about the idea of males trying too hard to appear secure, when in reality they deny much of themselves in fear of breaking the image of security, when one would be much happier by enjoying what one enjoys instead what a "stereotypical alpha male" should enjoy.

[@merry_christmas]

@@giraffelangenek398 I understand your concern, but I don't think the commenter meant it that way. What I feel as "masculinity without insecurity" is that unreasonable concepts of what makes you a man shouldn't dictate your life. Wear pink, show feelings, take pedicures, carry bags, sit crosslegged, watch romance movies, eat a salad, light candles, admit when you're hurt or sad or insecure. It's insane our society has branded these things onto one gender. Every day I hear my male colleagues subconsciously worrying about "presenting manliness". Yet they constantly mock the colleague that's picked up on meditation. And they always seek excuses for behavior they deem feminine. 'Yeah, I watched all Disney movies but I have two daughters'. 'Yeah, I eat healthy but it's because I'm building muscles'. An individual has EVERY right to be insecure. The idea of masculinity, more than anything, strips that right. People limit themselves, afraid not to tick all boxes. "Masculinity without insecurity" is about being an individual whose identity isn't shaped by a strict binary dataset where one 0.1 leads to complete emasculation.

[@icecreambone]

@@giraffelangenek398 yeah, it's important to ask this question for the people who don't have enough experience to interpret a single-line comment in context, or to avoid it getting taken out of context. that context being the many men in our lives who strictly conform to toxic masculinity out of fear of competition, and who often do everything other than communicating to try to cling to a relationship. in the worst case, i've seen a former friend spiral out of control refusing to get help for borderline personality disorder because men don't go to therapy. it's not so much "masculinity without insecurity" as it is "masculinity without insecurity about masculinity"

[@dreamcanvas5321]

@@giraffelangenek398 I think this is partially a limitation of language. If you reach a point where you accept your insecurities, are they really insecurities anymore? It's almost a grey area in our language and philosophy because we always see confidence and insecurity as opposites, but maybe in some contexts they actually co-exist. I can know, for example, that I have limitations, and which is sometimes frustrating and scary, those are my insecurities...but I also choose to be the best person I can be within my limitations, which is a form of confidence.

[@cr0426]

Waymond is the heart of the movie. The heart is most often the women, but the Daniels did an amazing job of flipping that trope on its head. The women are the center of the story, the complex and hard headed, which is breaking another trope. This movie is honestly genius.

[@Diogolindir]

I love that Waymond stared at that old asian couple expressing love at the tax's office and at the end Evelyn gave him an honest passionate kiss. What he deserves

[@Throckmorpheus]

i don’t know how i never put together the fact that they literally call the ‘alpha’ archetype version alpha waymond until you pointed it out here lmao

[@vanesa5395]

Totally flew over my head as well

[@hetastic_bro]

lmao same!!

[@maggiemcfly5267]

Oh I just accepted it was because he was from the first universe who made contact with the others. The conection to the archetype totally flew over my head.

[@isabelgimenez985]

Same

[@hialyssah]

same! i always thought it was alpha because it was the first one that made contact with other universes.

[@justsomegirlZT]

I noticed that the symbol for Jobu Tapaki: the everything bagel (a white middle with a black surround) is the exact opposite as the symbol for Waymond: the googly eye (a black middle with a white surround). Maybe it’s an added layer of diametric opposites since each of them represent opposing viewpoints on the universe. Jobu represents existential nihilism, while Waymond represents existential optimism.

[@mekkio77]

The bagel represents the taking of life. It sucks everything into nothingness. The googly eyes represent the giving of life. Stick a pair of googly eyes on anything and suddenly viola! You have a living creature. Evelyn is standing in the middle of these two. On one side you have Jobu who is suicidal and the other side is Waymond who fighting to go on. Evelyn has the choice between the two, the bagel or the googly eyes. So, you are right. Jobu is existential nihilism and Waymond is existential optimism. And Evelyn, is a us, a blank slate who has a choice between the two.

[@justsomegirlZT]

@@mekkio77 beautifully said

[@dragonoverlord_2379]

Wow. I never put that together! There’s probably so much more I missed with this movie.

[@LeoMajors]

Yin and yang.

[@raemontargaryen3005]

toppoki*

[@justanotherupscaspirant8837]

The fact that he says being kind is 'strategic' and a 'survival tactic' just blew me out of the water. I've had to be submissive and pacifist as a survival tactic and the moment I was out of that situation, i let the anger take over and became bitter and angry, thinking that i needed to be a strong harsh person to ensure no one took advantage of me ever again. All that did was make me feel out of my own skin and push away the few genuine friends i had. So for the last couple years I've been really confused as to what to do, how to be, who to be. Never expected a movie character to clear up that choice so easily. That being kind isnt submissive or weak, it's a different kind of power. This movie has literally been life changing for me

[@CyberGirl1234]

i totally relate. i also felt pressured to be less sensitive and naive, which is what i got called for trusting people and getting hurt. i’m only now learning that closing myself off and holding everyone at arm’s length made me insecure. no one knew the real me because i only let them get to know the mask, thinking that when i get left behind it’ll hurt less. i’m still working on being kind when it’s difficult, being vulnerable when it’s scary. i don’t want to be jaded or cold anymore. good luck to you ❤

[@justanotherupscaspirant8837]

@@CyberGirl1234 good luck to you too

[@Kowzorz]

Giving advantage can be a compassionate, yet powerful act. Its how mob bosses do it.

[@rafearcher7882]

I'm so glad to learn that we finally live in times where creative and philosophical films like those can become Best Picture.

[@CantEscapeFlorida]

actually if you look at the most highly rated films of all time....the majority of them are like this.

[@rafearcher7882]

@@CantEscapeFlorida The way that the morals are shown, yes. The way it was filmed, not so much. Also: I see Nietzsche, I see Dostojewski and I see Kant. An intellectual mixture.

[@CantEscapeFlorida]

@@rafearcher7882 no I mean cerebral, time warping, psychological, etc.

[@CantEscapeFlorida]

Pulp Fiction, Fight Club, Inception, Matrix, Interstellar, Back to the Future

[@rafearcher7882]

@@CantEscapeFlorida Yeah, but they all never became BP, this one finally did and that's why it's special.

[@Curryfishballa]

Waymond is basically my dad. He is always patient, not the most capable in many things, always allowing my mom to release her tantrum and even sometimes disrespecting him, my relatives look down on him cause he makes lesser money than my mom and is also the poorest in our family. Heck at 23, i am making 2-3X more money than my dad. But it’s because my dad that we have the luxury of harmony and peace, it’s because of my dad spending most of his savings and become poor for my education that I was able to enjoy a more privileged life, my dad was always the one picking me up and to school everyday as he is “self employed”. My dad was the one who taught me humility and how to be a proper human. My dad was my main supporter when it comes to my art career and whatever emo awkward attitude phases that I went through as a teenager. He is my unsung hero. I love you dad

[@ruthless1275]

you are so lucky

[@AL-fl4jk]

Hug your dad

[@atulmishra932]

More power to your dad

[@lyoo3452]

This made me cry.. Thanks for sharing this. What a wonderful dad.

[@theonlymaven]

i had a painfully similar experience watching this movie. all my life, my father was seen as naive, and lackadaisical in life, not caring about finances and his personal dignity enough to be able to be serious about life, and letting others walk all over him. that laundry and taxes scene makes me break down every single time, because that’s who he is, a divorced man for the very reason the movie celebrates raymond, who now runs his own restaurant, works 7 days a week and gives all of what he has to make his son happy and give him the best shot in life. it’s makes me break down. thank you dad i love you 💖

[@bioscrappyvideos5369]

When the focus was shifted to Waymond, and he got to speak out his motives… I finally saw myself represented on screen… After years of being called soft by everyone, being mocked and bullied, called stupid and naive, down to my parents who often take advantage of my kindness so to speak… and my dad who often scolds me for trying to help others and encourages me to be selfish and only think about myself. Like waymond said, this is how I fight… This is how I find my reasons to keep pushing forward… Not by hating everything, and being selfish… But by being positive, and trying to help as much as I can. And also, like Waymond said: this is not me being naive… I know how the world works, I know how much bad there is, and how little things make sense and/or matter. That’s why this movie hit me so hard. Because it showed me something I’d already come to terms with since overcoming my depression and suicidal thoughts… If nothing matters… then why not enjoy things?. If it’s all going to end… then let’s at least go out with a smile. I loved the movie, but I definitely loved Waymond… because i finally saw proof, that the way I live is not wrong. I am not a mistake, I am not blinded by positivity… I am trying to survive just as much as everyone else… Just, my way to do so, is different, but it absolutely matters.

[@Meraxes6]

Thank you for this. I absolutely loved that the whole movie pivoted around Waymond’s worldview. He literally saved the world just by being kind and supporting others. I also realized a long time ago that if nothing matters, then everything matters, and we might as well bring as much joy into the world as we can. I’ve always had trouble verbalizing this to others, especially black-pilled people who are so sure that their worldview is the only objective truth and that everyone else is dumb and weak. This movie expressed what I’ve been trying to say unsuccessfully for decades, and I appreciate it so much 😭

[@iiiiitsmagreta1240]

❤

[@VayaKahvi]

@@Meraxes6 You and the above comment have reminded me of a line from a webcomic, where the reply to a nihilistic speech about how nothing matters was "Does it matter that it doesn't matter?" which was framed as: if *you* know you're making a positive impact now, does it matter you won't be remembered by history.

[@thomasi.4981]

@@Meraxes6 "If nothing matters then everything matters" is a realization I have had as well. It's cool to see someone else say it like that.

[@radbradke]

Thanks for eloquently displaying my thoughts as both a Waymond & an Asian American male

[@jamesthomas3581]

That transition from Flash getting punched down the hallway to Waymond picking up the divorce papers just as the teacher goes to look down was so clean and you're not getting enough credit for it

[@sanachanto]

Ooo thanks for highlighting that cut, you’re absolutely right. Time stamp for anyone curious 9:24

[@uniworkhorse]

@@sanachanto thank you!

[@briar_the.discoyt]

Ke Huy Quan was recently nominated for an Oscar for this role. I don't usually care about the Oscars but he (and the whole cast honestly) needs to win! I find his character so important in the discussion of modern masculinity. In a scary world it's important to be kind. Edit: love to see people returning to this post to share the good news! I was able to watch the Oscars and saw the movie won in multiple categories. All of the acceptances were so touching❤️

[@QuixoticDucky]

He won :)

[@lisleycastro9388]

He won!!!

[@ruisinjams]

PEACE AND LOVE ON EARTH!! HE DID IT!!! 😭🤧❤🥳✨

[@tuamigoyvecinolevi]

3 people already said it, but he won, also did Jamie Lee Curtis and Michelle Yeo EEAAO won a lot of Oscars, which were very well deserved

[@leeanucha]

yes he won!

[@emmahua7020]

waymond is so important and i cry every time i think about him. the way he represents masculinity is important in so many more ways. as an asian woman, i’ve noticed that a lot (not all) of asian men tend to buy into the more “alpha” kind of masculinity as a way to make up for how asian men are perceived in western media. and i think waymond is important in that aspect because he embodies a healthy masculinity that is free of insecurity. we need to see more male asian characters like him.

[@ritadogg4269]

❤️❤️❤️

[@christopherszeto8527]

We could definitely do better. I think it's hard because we want to be seen as masculine, but we have to do it in a way that avoids all the toxic traits from it. I actually had a conversation about this with a friend of mine. What do people want from us? To get tattoos, start bar fights, and be womanizing pieces of garbage? But I don't want to be like that at all, and I don't want to be a pushover. It's great to see someone like Waymond who embodies the choice of being good and positive masculinity.

[@Andrewbait]

That's hard when Asian women constantly put them down over white men

[@icecreambone]

@@Andrewbait then you should aim for women that aren't toxic and value empathy

[@Andrewbait]

@@icecreambone yes cause systemic issues can be solved trough empathy. 1 million IQ take

[@PayondeAwsome]

Waymond fucking destroyed me. It hit me so, so hard. Seeing this sort of character and his perspective in a movie on the big screen was amazing. Right when he starts sweeping and humming to himself after everything that's been happening made me start crying and I didn't stop until the drive home. Just the message of radical positivity and the ultimate anti-nihilism. I love to see it.

[@Meraxes6]

When he starts sweeping up the broken glass, it broke me. She’s sitting there in utter despair and defeat, and he’s still just there beside her, quietly picking up the pieces with a smile. He has every right to be angry with her in that scene, but he has nothing but compassion for her. And that makes her fall in love with him again.

[@Araragification]

@@Meraxes6 I'm not crying, You're crying

[@bennyton2560]

@@Meraxes6 what's even better is he was humming a corny new year song in chinese, the equivalent of christmas music😭 the man is too pure

[@AL-fl4jk]

Stop it I just stopped crying

[@walden6272]

I'm a grown man. What's this water running down my cheeks??? Why won't it stop?

[@bonzaiiblitzz]

As a young filipino american man, I never thought I would see a character like Waymond represented in Hollywood. I've always felt like I needed to adhere to the traditional personality of alpha male that is so prevalent in the US. It's so refreshing to see this type of character, especially since he reminds me of my own kind of masculinity.

[@ibm30rpg]

You don't always have to hide behind your race. Defeats the whole purpose of ridding of racism.

[@thorfinnthegoatmc]

cant even imagine any actor who can play Waymond like Ke Huy Quan did in this film. He deserves all the awards hes getting

[@szewei85]

After more than 30 years that made the moment sweeter haha

[@FranciscoHOS]

He oozes kindness and joy as a person. It's no wonder he pulled off Waymond so well.

[@tbone2885]

I think this is another great example of a great "flat character". The misconception that characters who don't go through a character arc shouldn't work is often taught to many young aspiring writers. But the fact remains that some of the most beloved characters are "flat". Samwise Gamgee being my first thought. Throughout the entire LOTR narrative, he remains the staunch loyal companion who loves gardening. The man, ahem, hobbit, doesn't fundamentally change despite saving the world. And so Waymond once again shows that flat characters can be some of the most memorable and important characters to a narrative.

[@katara2021]

I like the term static instead of flat for such characters. Flat conjures up an image of something without depth or thought put into it.

[@vistalover9607]

Why did you type "Ahem, hobbit", when you could have just typed Hobbit and get on with your message? And did you actually clear your throat on text? That was a weird read, I might as well have..... oh Hachoo oh pardon me I just sneezed. See what I did ther, cough cough dear me I must be catching a cold. AHEM. Where were we again?

[@thedapperdolphin1590]

@@katara2021 Static is the correct term. Flat refers to characters without any depth. All flat characters are static because they don’t have anything to change. However, a rounded character can be static or dynamic.

[@katara2021]

@@thedapperdolphin1590 Exactly! It all comes down to whether your character is one dimensional or not.

[@Meraxes6]

Right! Sam doesn’t change because he doesn’t need to. Same with Waymond. He’s already got things figured out, he doesn’t need to learn anything, unlike the other characters. Instead he serves as the anchor for the story and for Evelyn

[@joem4585]

If you went back in time and told me a movie where a guy shoves a trophy up his butt for combat purposes would turn out to be one of the most moving and life-affirming films I've ever seen...

[@herefishyfishy13]

Oh and brace yourself because a rock falling will make you cry

[@discreetbiscuit237]

@@herefishyfishy13 😭😭

[@JimJamTheAdmin]

I remember seeing the butt plug award and thinking "No way that's anything more than a quick gag." I was glad to be wrong.

[@guitarkid2184]

And also a movie that features a beautiful relationship in an alternate dimension where people's fingers are so long and floppy that they need to play piano with their feet.

[@BlownMacTruck]

Please stop being overly dramatic. You could take scenes from all sorts of great films completely out of context to the point that they sound just as absurd as your description and it would still apply. And you got 800+ upvotes. That’s just sad.

[@CreoTan]

As an autistic person who’s had to put effort into fostering empathy and social grace-I liked Waymond from the get go! I never once thought he was weak and didn’t even consider that he was also addressing the audience. I immediately recognized how he was always being helpful in smoothing things over and how he was the one with the people skills. I like original waymond so much, I didn’t even realize alpha waymond was a jerk!

[@bigjedimullet]

I love that Waymond’s worldview is represented by the googly eyes. A stapler is just a stapler until you put googly eyes on it. Then it’s a little buddy. Things in the wider world may not objectively seem like they matter, but we can choose to decide that they matter, just like Waymond decides that it matters to be kind.

[@juliannehannes11]

And this is where male Autism and female Autism differs, I am Autistic with ADHD and very much like Waymond with too much empathy and kindness for others that I put myself last to be accomidating and make others feel at ease and can't stomach someone being uncomfortable in my presence. My public mask is being a dutiful nurturing people pleaser. Girls with Autism aren't allowed to have public meltdowns and have it beat out of us and we learn to mask by grade school for survival for girls aren't allowed to misbehave and be selfish like boys who can be boys and get away with everything, little girls who act out and are disruptive get punished and shamed endlessly. I'm not telling you this to make you feel bad but to give you awareness of the other half Autism that exists as much as your male Autism as different as we are.

[@starshake8998]

Same here!

[@ma.2089]

Alpha Waymond was kind of a jerk, but tbh, can’t blame him? He’s been through a lot, and by the end believes in Evelyn. He risked his life and ultimately lost his life trying to help others, and unlike alpha dad, alpha Waymond did change on his own. Goes to show that Waymond is pretty amazing no matter the timeline.

[@cheesewithxbread]

@@ma.2089 I disagree, Waymond had so much kindness-- that even Alpha Waymond was loving and protective

[@facundovignoli]

Damn man, Ke is just sooo good at playing one single character while making it adopt many different personalities. Such a brilliant chameleonic performance.

[@EchonoxYT]

“The only thing I do know, is that we have to be kind”, one of my favorite lines

[@EdmondOliverLives]

I really like the line right after. "Please... Be kind. Especially when we don't know what's going on."

[@Cancellator5000]

Seems like it was inspired by Vonnegut “God damn it, you've got to be kind.”

[@lindyhop24]

When "buisness Waymond" says "When I choose to see the good side of things, I'm not being naive. It is strategic and necessary. It's how I've learned to survive through everything" I feel so seen. Not only is this depiction of kindness/optimism unique, I feel that seeing it coming from a male character is even more important for us to see given the deluge of toxic masculinity present in media. Waymond means so much to me, and I really hope we get more amazing depictions of masculinity like this in the future.

[@dilnasssssss]

I also felt seen when he said that it's his way

[@Zathren]

Just remember that there's no such thing as "toxic masculinity" like they claim. The reality is that individuals can be horrible, toxic, and evil. Whether they're male or female doesn't have to do with anything.

[@blooms454]

@@ZathrenThis is a concept that does exist and has been shown in society. Everyone can be bad but that doesn’t negate that this is a very real concept that has had immense consequences in our society

[@onlyonsundays7843]

@@Zathren There is a scientific, societal definition to toxic masculinity that goes beyond 'just so happening to be a man, who is toxic.' If you think centuries of holding inherent dominance in a society hasn't had an impact on the way the world is right now, and the way our society specifically presents masculinity and the issues involved, you should try looking at it scientifically and read some research.

[@lemfandango]

Very humble of you

[@facundovignoli]

Through out the film i felt very bad for Waymond. While Evelyn was having a hard time trying to keep everything working on, and more later with the multiverse issue, he was always by her side supporting her, trying to see the good things out of all the stress and problems, showing her that side as well. It hurt me how he was looked down as the “silly husband that ruins everything”, when he actually was able to convince Deirdre of giving Evelyn and her family another opportunity to fix their defense on the tax evasion issue, TWICE. He even managed to convince her of not sending Evelyn to jail for attacking her and destroying the laundry. Even tho he knew that his family had made mistakes, he always fought to put everyone and everything together, he really wanted the best for his family, considering such a hard thing like divorcing from his wife, in order to, maybe, make her live a happier life. All of that, he accomplished it just by talking rationally, respectfully and being nice. Dude, Waymond is my hero, i want to be like him.

[@ApexGale]

The divorce papers weren't even meant to be considered seriously. Waymond admits he only served them because Evelyn pretty much never sat down and tried to discuss their relationship and future together with him. It was his way of trying to get her to pull away from all of her misery and open up again. It's supposed to show you just how poorly she has been treating him, that a man as kind as Waymond had to resort to that method.

[@anneconley2239]

"When I choose to see the good side of things, I'm not being naive. It's strategic and necessary. It's how I've learned to survive through everything." My favorite line in this, and maybe even any, movie. Love it!

[@Cherriheart]

I was told that EEAAO had a significant mother-daughter storyline going into this film and that the multiverse was involved in this film. Waymond and his involvement in the story completely caught me by surprise and I was so moved by him and his approach to life. He actually reminds me of my own dad which made his scenes hit even harder.. Ke Huy Quan was incredible in this role and Waymond was written wonderfully.

[@taliatis7305]

Waymond reminds me of my dad too, and the scene where Business Waymond explains his worldview had me bawling. It was so radical to see a depiction of a man's proactive empathy

[@jkfecke]

Part of the problem with describing Everything Everywhere is that there is *so much* there. It is a great story about generational trauma, and the importance of kindness, and the overvaluing of wealth as opposed to human connections, and also a silly movie about butt plug trophies. It is one of the greatest pieces of media I have ever had the privilege to see.

[@cookiemonster59263]

I think it says a lot that the movie was originally supposed to have a male lead until the Daniels found Michelle Yeoh and then restructured the film to work with her as the primary lead instead. I wonder if Waymond was originally supposed to the doting, emotional wife while Evelyn was meant to be the husband having a moment of action before coming to understand his wife's point of view. I'm glad they changed it - this movie had me sobbing from the second act on

[@jakoick1298]

@@cookiemonster59263 waymond was honestly the best character in that movie much more interesting than michelle's

[@ravikanodia]

@@jkfecke I paused the movie, and I said to my wife "hey, do you see the trophies behind her? They look like buttplugs, get it - like she works for the IRS, so she won a bunch of awards for being a huge pain in the ass" and then we were both cracking up when it turned out they were not just a background gag but a plot element of the movie

[@mannyvalerio6822]

That's just how a Flat Arc works: instead of a character needing to discard the Lie that prevents their growth, a Flat Arc character wields a TRUTH that opposes the Lie that everyone else believes. Their story is not in changing themselves, but in /subjecting the rest of the narrative to a growth arc/.

[@middenway]

Yeah, this is precisely why Wall-E works.

[@Hekateras]

Oh I love that phrasing. Thank you for sharing

[@Hekateras]

@@middenway Wall-E, Samwise Gamgee, the Paddington Bear (?? apparently?), the list goes on

[@NataliaBiasi]

Now I understand Toph from Avatar. She is exactly as you described.

[@cameronfrye8311]

@@Hekateras yeah Paddington really fits the flat arc in both movies

[@ollieexists]

going into this movie i thought that as an asian teenage daughter i would identify more with joy and her story. but no, it was waymond’s montage that had me crying and lamenting. don’t get me wrong, i still very much loved and identified with joys story but something about waymond and his attempts to keep his and evelyn’s relationship together is just so emotional and heartbreaking. plus, him being played by a viet actor (i’m viet) who i’ve seen before (indiana jones ofc) just made his character so comforting. truly an oscar deserving performance

[@x_xnicko]

The realization when you think Waymond is lucky to get Evelyn but it is she who is the lucky one to have a Waymond as her husband.

[@lhpkazuha]

As an Asian daughter, the movie only convinced me that it’ll take a ridiculous mind-boggling absurd impropable nihilistic psychedelic world-changing chain of events to change the minds of Asian mothers. But I think we can all agree Waymond saved all of us.

[@yellowonesdontstop]

😂 Asian mothers do be stubborn

[@sj-237]

Hahaha. I was thinking the same.

[@harshitnagar4466]

Word, sister👏👏👏👏

[@sopan047]

Same!

[@AArch64_Gamer]

As an Asian son, I think that the way I deal with things is similar to Waymond in the movie. My parents always tell me to be tougher. The line: “You think I’m weak, don’t you? When I choose to see the good side of things, I’m not being naïve. It is strategic and necessary. It’s how I’ve learned to survive through everything. This is how I fight.”, would describe me.

[@heyustabbedme]

i watched this movie months ago, why am i still crying about it

[@natejones873]

I've seen this movie 5 times and still cry about it

[@shreya4265]

I cried while even watching this video

[@linearcurve]

because it’s an amazing movie?

[@kellymonkeefern]

OMG same.

[@alexgaggio2957]

@@shreya4265 same 😭

[@TanTran-dr8pj]

I am from Vietnam and I am proud to have Quan Kế Huy representing the vietnamese-american life here in the US. QKH is not well known at all in Vietnam but he is such an inspiration

[@zeitgeistx5239]

Viet Chinese.

[@Amtcboy]

Vietnamese government doesn’t think so.

[@tetanusteta3871]

He's not weak at all, he is strong for standing up against the world of toxicity by being the complete opposite and holding on to his values even in the face of possible death. If you are weak , you cannot be good, because it takes strength to be good.

[@GoVocaloider]

As a south asian woman, I gravitate towards media that have strong female leads, so this film certainly caught my eye. But what I found by the time that I finished this film, is that while I loved the way that the film examined intergenerational trauma through Joy and Evelyn's relationship, it is Waymond who spoke to me the most. I have always pushed this brand of kindness, as I believe it is the most effective at allowing people to remain comfortably themselves in the presence of others, but often, I have been labelled "naive" and people are not as conscientious when they say and do things that could hurt me; as though I don't understand the difficulties of this world and am therefore, weak and inconsequential. It took me a very long time to come to the understanding that, I am not weak, nor am I naive and that choosing to treat others with kindness despite knowing how cruel the world could be was actually a very great strength. I have since struggled to voice this idea and felt jaded that people chose to look at me in this diminishing way. So when I heard Business Waymond's speech, I felt so understood and moved to the point of tears - something I did not expect as I do not often find myself relating to many male characters in popular media. I can only imagine the pain and relief that someone who fits Waymond's own demographic (asian, male) and way of viewing the world might have felt watching this film. My own father is a man like Waymond and I have always felt so grateful that I was born into this world with him as my dad. This film is so important and I, for one, am glad to see more much-needed empathy in the industry of film.

[@kiana6065]

Hey GoVocaloider; I know this is two weeks after you posted this haha, but your comment really spoke to me as well. Similar to you, I am an asian (middle eastern) woman whose always carried that same approach in life - to be kind and treat others with kindness despite the cruelness and lack of empathy in the world. All my life as well my close friends and family have warned me to minimize that behavior as it can lead to becoming a pushover; although I do understand their concern, like you beautifully said, it is rather a great strength than a deabitaling weakness. I think it speaks volumes that society as a whole views this mentality as weak - maybe so as to avoid the truth that more empathy and kindness in the world could benefit us rather than destroy. I hope all is well and you continue to live life with that misunderstood, but vital mentality :).

[@GoVocaloider]

@@kiana6065 Oh man, do I understand where you are coming from! I've also been told similar things by my family. It has made me wonder if there isn't a way for people like us to receive respect while also continuing to be kind. But I think thanks to media like this, hopefully this will come to change the narrative around people like Waymond. And we can help spread that knowledge too - by standing up for ourselves the way Waymond did for himself. And you are right, it does speak volumes that society views this as a weakness. Maybe it's because humanity as a whole is still "healing" from it's short existence on the planet - most of which was heavily dependent on simply surviving. Since we're coming into a day and age when some of us are in a place that we have the knowledge and safety to start looking within, maybe that is why we're at this point of recognizing the need for change. Who knows? Anyway, it was good to talk to you and thank you for taking the time to respond!

[@DIRTY-MERLIN]

[@zabeerfarid7687]

Hi also south asian but I’m a guy and I can totally say I felt a lot of pain and relief over Waymond as a character. Growing up as one of the only SA people I know I was already apart from everyone else and especially my masculinity was put into question a lot as I was a very empathetic and energetic person. I remember feelings of a lot of guilt and issues in my self confidence until I eventually shut down and just started to embrace my quiet side in fear of judgement. Waymond was the character I needed to see.

[@GoVocaloider]

@@zabeerfarid7687 I'm sorry to hear about how people have treated you, and I definitely understand where you are coming from! Also, like you mentioned, being the only person of a given demographic in your community can add to the problem and be a very isolating experience - people don't often recognize just how bad it feels, until they experience it themselves. I'm glad Waymond exists and I hope his presence as a character in popular media will set a higher bar for what is accepted as a good example of what healthy masculinity can look like. Thank you for commenting and please, keep being your lovely energetic and empathic self! Being a kind human has nothing to do with being less masculine, and we should strive to spread that message.

[@ProfessionalProcrastinator1]

I cried so hard at the movie theater when I heard his monolog. I absolutely love this type of men, sweet, caring and goofy, the kind of person who just will always be there for you. Such wholesome character 🤍🤍🤍

[@thesaintzor625]

When he said "in another life I'd be happy to do just laundry and taxes with you", I felt it in my bones. That's how you love. Not because it makes you the most successful person but because it gives you the strength to be the best of you even in the worst of times.

[@jinxedangel2]

Same! I cried many times during this film but Waymond's scenes really hit me. I thought he was endearing and sweet from the start and didn't understand why Evelyn was so mean to him and seeing that he had been using those traits all along to better their situation warmed my heart.

[@casusbelli9225]

The kind of person like him represents mediocrity. >the kind of person who just will always be there for you. "Simple", "flat" people like that, usually, will NOT. This kind of person may be anything in real life, but "reliable" is not a word that describes them. Yeah, they are ok when you change pics of cats over the internet, or have a small talk about weather, but the moment something serious comes up, this kind of person will either quickly fold, or bail out. The confusion of that and, let's say, friendship or romance, is staggering and, to be honest, worrisome. It's entertaining mediocrity and with it, compliancy.

[@Darth_Insidious]

@@casusbelli9225 Waymond never bailed out on his wife though. Maybe cowards can look superficially similar but Waymond is different.

[@solar6284]

@@casusbelli9225 I feel like you're talking about an entirely different person. This character is the opposite of avoidant, he is always there to root his family to reality. Just because he is positive and optimistic doesn't mean he is unreliable.

[@n2bfw884]

Waymond is the cinematic embodiment of men of all ages who stayed true to themselves and gained wisdom through their years.

[@Elamado97]

And evelyn the opposite😂

[@wittleMermaid13]

Holy Shit. When you said WE the audience are the ones that went through the character arc. Gut punch. I'm completely floored like I was after watching the movie. My perspective changed and I couldn't entirely put my finger on it.

[@Pressbutan]

I’m so glad he won a Golden Globe for this portrayal. Such a fantastic job, making the character larger than life

[@osedseam]

Just by reading the comments here, what his portrayal of the character did to do many person's life's is just fair that he get the recognition he deserves for his work. There is not more helpful way to Halo as many people as possible than to inspire them to keep going and show there are other ways to be strong in a world where kindness is often view as a weakness.

[@hjk6606]

He also won an Oscar for this role.👍🏽

[@parzios]

I really hope he also gets the oscar

[@somnathsurve7449]

And now he got Oscar nomination

[@parzios]

@@somnathsurve7449 the nomination, i hope he gets awarded

[@Kurpify]

"What Waymond advocates is actionable empathy. It's empathy that you don't wait around for. It's the kind of radical empathy that we can take and use to fundamentally change our reality." Fuck yeah bruh. ;)

[@nzeity0160]

I started the movie by thinking Waymond was a very cute, silly and timid guy, and ended the movie realising he was one of the strongest yet sweetest characters

[@user-en7ll3og6c]

Waymond actually reminds me of my grandfather. He was a kind, sweet and loving man who loved to have fun and fool around. I'm actually crying right now because he is not longer here with us. Also, crazy how kindess and love from a male protagonist are revolutionary concepts in Hollywood...

[@sunfeatherX3]

I love how so many of us saw our dads on the big screen. Men that are careful and considerate. That look for solutions, not fights. It’s so great that we all saw that, and that so many dads are so cool

[@g.3521]

I'm not a father but I aspire to be like Waymond. I feel like I used to be but the hardships of the world have made me more pessimistic and cold and more into the stereotypical 'strong' man

[@haunted14]

I'm so jealous, my father is the exact opposite. I WISH he could be anything besides angry and negative. But I did see my husband in Waymond. He is the most kind, caring, sweet, and genuine person I have ever met. He is just the purest, most sensitive soul and he does what he can to make the world better. He literally works in a homeless shelter, for god's sake. EEAAO gave me even more of an appreciation for him and how much I need him. He centers me, and I'm eternally grateful the universe was kind enough to give him to me, especially when I wasn't blessed with a man like that as my father.

[@Maryamrockify]

Aw I'm not alone

[@chocolateaddictedartist5924]

Same! Like my father may not be super 'alpha' or stereotypically 'macho', but he's very kind and considerate.

[@e6026]

I think this says a lot about the kind of woman men want to marry lol

[@burntrosechick]

I cried a lot during the film. But as a child raised in a abusive home who was blessed with a step father later in my teens. A quiet, compassionate, kind Filipino. Whom people in general from his biological family, to coworkers, and acquaintances...assume he's simple in the head. Or damaged because he rarely acts traditionally masculine. He is a caretaker at heart. Who never stops believing in you once he sees your potential. He listens. He might not always respond when you're used to people interjecting....or venting their own troubles. Instead he hears you. He rarely judges, and regularly bends over backwards to provide a better life for his family. While also being present, engaged, and observant in ways that still surprise us. So seeing a character who reminded me so much of my dad. It made me cry. I sobbed like a baby because he's quietly taught me how to be a genuinely better human being. To continue to hope for the best while my anxiety riddled brain prepares for the worst. To make moments special. Even little day to day stuff because life is fleeting and our memories are what we keep closest to our hearts. To take time when I'm upset or angry. Whatever was going on before that can wait until I can think rationally....and to be kind. Not nice, but kind. Understand my limits and accept help when you need it. To ask when I need help. Suffering in silence helps no one. And lastly....good men do exist. And I don't deserve such a bamf of a dad. But sometimes after you crawl through hell you get blessed by the universe that dragged you.

[@acatindisguise]

some people are just natural caretakers. i wish the world wouldn't make it a gendered trait

[@ShreyaChheda]

Thank you for sharing this, this hit me, it's truly amazing you are blessed with a wonderful father figure. I'm saving what you wrote in my notes to remind me what I usually tend to forget myself :)

[@DaleKamp]

That's the kind of father I hope to be. I also grew up in an abusive home, so I'm glad you got someone like that in your life.

[@burntrosechick]

@@DaleKamp hey all it takes if effort, time, genuine care, and patience. I believe you can be that kind of parent. Just remember if you don't feel like you're doing enough. Or you could be better you're on the right track. Bad parents are the ones who think they're fine. They're perfect and any proof to the contrary is wrong, or malicious slander.

[@adanice49]

Such a beautiful comment Elissa. Genuinely made me cry which rarely happens from KZbin. Your dad sounds like an absolutely lovely man and I’m glad he imbued those values into you (I’m sure you’re also a lovely person to begin with). Give him a hug for me pls

[@GravityBouncer]

I’m so surprised that none of my friends enjoyed this movie and yet it’s potentially my all time favorite. as someone who’s met so many defeatists and cynical people, it was so heart-wrenchingly beautiful and reassuring to see a character portrayed with ideals and morals i hold to the highest esteem.

[@-_-0.0-_-]

yes! - Waymond doesn't need character growth. Others characters needed to grow to realize who Waymond really was and the growth he already had. great video

[@ericmoulot9148]

That's because the Multiverse trope succeeds in making us believe he's already had that sort of character growth and lived the life of his alternate versions, somehow. Without us, the audience, and his wife, having seen these other versions of him, his final message would hold no legitimacy.

[@EliSprague]

@@ericmoulot9148 Honestly a bit of disagree, the point they make is not that he's already gone through this arc, it's that he doesn't go through an arc. He hasn't already had his trial, he just is the way he is and is content, more so tenacious about it. It's literally almost the opposite, alpha-waymond who has gone through an arc ISN'T this way anymore. I agree that seeing other waymonds help, but it's not about character growth for waymond at all, it's as the video says, it's about viewer growth or perspective.

[@DaddyGamerReviews]

Waymond quickly launched himself into my list of favorite fictional characters of all time alongside Uncle Iroh, Samwise Gamgee, and Paddington all of which who's kindness and empathy cause real and striking change in those around them. Waymond also finally inspired a tattoo I actually want to get and am comfortable having on my body forever. A pair of googley eyes on my calf. Thank you for this video, I teared up watching it being reminded of everything that makes Waymond such a compelling and rare character.

[@LeakyOrifices]

I think the googly eyes tattoo sounds like a wonderful idea, now feeling inspired to get one myself honestly!

[@solfeo8905]

You just to had to mention Mikey Walsh while tpwe’re trying to focus on ‘Data’ didn’t you ? ;} 12:13-12:20 a low-key burn at hustle culture

[@AngeloBarovierSD]

I'd like to nominate Aunt Meg from TWISTER for this list. She doesn't accomplish anything heroic but her kindness keeps people happy and together. She's just _that_ person whom all love and cherish, and who encourages people to be their best selves. Even Melissa, the fish out of water who really doesn't like Bill's old life/friends can't help but recognize Meg's kindness and charm.

[@TheSkystrider]

Uncle Iroh ftw!! Wow, only now do I have a better sense as to why Samwise Gamgee has always been my fav LOTR character ever since I was about 10yrs old, which is over 25 yrs ago. I always simplified it as being about his undying loyalty but clearly it's more than that - it's that a good hearted person can cling to their core and even though they may adapt, learn some skills etc, their core kindness can be maintained and utilized to great effect.

[@sher-min4546]

I was going to make the Samwise Gamgee comparison too!

[@WaywardFanboy]

Dear Pop Culture Detective, Words cannot describe how eternally grateful I am that you created this video! On the days when I feel hopeless, I come revisit this video to heal. Waymond Wang has become my all time favorite fictional character and Ke Huy Quan has become one of my all time favorite people and I absolutely love your analysis on his character! Thank you thank you so much for what you created here! You should be incredibly proud! I know I am! Cheers and much love! ❤

[@valtriztkhalifah4266]

same ive watched this video for 4 times by now everytime i need a good cry

[@scottmead854]

Thank you for such a beautiful essay. In the West, particularly in the US, masculinity is so narrowly defined, it often just boils down to just physical dominance. But there are so many more meaningful, wholesome ways to be strong. Being kind is being strong. Being vulnerable is being strong. Being able to keep going despite realizing that we're all fragile is being strong. Lending your voice to someone who needs it is being strong. Being a good listener is being strong. Finding ways to tread as gently as possible on this Earth is being strong. Seeking for knowledge is being strong. Not treating any living thing as being above or below us is being strong.

[@n2bfw884]

You're right. I'm glad we have a movie to spell those strengths out for the masses. I'm sure many were surprised.

[@Elamado97]

Strong and masculine is not the same thing

[@NatManzano]

When Waymond says "This is how I fight", I felt like a million unsung heroes were portrayed. Thank you for this video. As well as "Everything Everywhere All at Once", it is necessary.

[@Celestein]

Waymond is not only a subversion of masculinity, he is a subversion of our notion of 'power'. Society tends to present power as explosive, unflinching and 'big', like it must flex, crush and even destroy to prove and preserve itself. Kindness is often viewed as noble but weak and unimpressive. However, the lasting, sustained and wise power of nurturing and choosing goodness and compassion is what keeps us human and going forward. It is not celebrated or noticed as much as explosive displays of might, yet it quietly saves us day after day.

[@teampyro911]

Wow very well said madame.

[@lissandrafreljord7913]

Very well said.

[@hello7032]

This hit me hard…thank you

[@gzapray7203]

Standing ovation to you, sir/maam/your majesty/whatever title that fits you.

[@Alyssa_MC]

@🏳️‍🌈⃠ Resist The State, Abolish Democracy And France will have to disagree with those assessments lol France isnt a domineering country on the world stage, and in many instances in history and present day can be considered a "soft" power. They get by not on military power, or other "domineering" power, but because of art, vacationers, and trying to have good relations with other countries. This is just a limited understanding of different countries however (even myself have limited knowledge) but my point is this : no matter how you slice the cake, different forms of power are just as useful as the next. It's really all subjective.

[@sherlockwatson101]

“The only thing I do know is that we have to be kind. Please, be kind. Especially if we don’t know what’s going on” I fell in love

[@heilamwether8911]

I’m so glad he was able to win the Oscars, this man deserves it.

[@NicheNonsense]

the "this is how I fight" made me cry the first time in theaters. it really sealed the healing and the power of absurdism as a philisophy coursing throughout this. that "nothing matters" is a good thing kinda thinking that helps people crawl out of dark places. it's not that nothing matters but that the only things that matter are what you decide, and where you put your energy and at the end of the day you can't control anything beside your little corner of the universe, so enjoy the little moments, break out the googly eyes and lean into the entropy

[@DisgruntledPeasant]

It was powerful that the difference between joys "nothing matters" and evalyns "nothing matters" is just tone. No grand rational debate, no intilectual treaty... Just tone. That's what waymond brings to her life, a subtle shift in tone that reorients the entire universe.

[@to2burger]

Well said “…the only things that matter are what you decide”, it’s all just Entropy baby.

[@osedseam]

You have no idea how the words you chose here resonated in me with something I had running in my mind for sometime. Thank you.

[@sayjaibao01188]

"Lean into the entropy..." Will do. Thank you!

[@cynthiaignisdivine]

I've never had such a strong reaction to a movie character. At one point towards the end of the movie I started crying and told my husband I wish my dad had been like waymond. My mom and I deserved better.

[@estherpettigrew3042]

Ditto.

[@sealwhiskers3515]

Same.

[@whyeeolivia]

I cried so much when I was watching this movie...well deserved Oscars...please just give them all the Oscars

[@randompenguin9514]

They all pretty much did 😅

[@martinjugolin2087]

It sucks, the message is a lie and wrong

[@whyeeolivia]

@@martinjugolin2087 what do you mean lmao

[@martinjugolin2087]

@@whyeeolivia go ahead and treat a rapist, mass murderer with kindness, good luck lmao

[@galehunter2519]

Waymond’s instinct to be kind when he doesn’t know what’s going on, is a very inspiring message. There are so many times where a tragic news article is released and we don’t understand how the event happened. It’s so easy to fall into picking a side and attacking the opponent with preconceived biases. However, if we can offer some amount of empathy and kindness to the perpetrator, then we can take the first step in offering support.

[@thegoblinking279]

one of my favorite parts about this particular arc is how despite the flaws that evelyn overcomes being typically “masculine” ones (ie, the way she devalues imagination/childishness and goes for combative over collaborative behavior), she is never framed as becoming “more of a woman” for overcoming them. it’s one of my least favorite tropes when a masculine, aloof female character is introduced, and her warming up to people over the story is directly aligned with her feminization over the story. eeaao does an absolutely INCREDIBLE job at decoupling both positive and negative traits from any form of gender binary. kindness is important and determination are important, no matter who they’re coming from, and they don’t have to contradict each other to both be true. it’s especially impressive that the movie manages this while the entire cast presents pretty traditionally for their gender, besides joba topacky, who is always dressed like a drag queen. anyway, super excited to see another video from you, especially about one of the best movies of the current century!

[@DahVoozel]

Living up to parental expectations, failing to meet those expectations, and then being caught back into a cycle of expectations and disappointment, inauthentic existance. And then it turns out that the universe where her father is happiest, the one where he is fulfilled, is the one where Evelyn stands up to him in defense of her daughter and her daughter's girlfriend.

[@solar6284]

I love your comment. You make an excellent point that kindness is misattributed to feminization, which is wrong. Evelyn (and my mom) have their own issues to work out, but they should never be described as "masculine", "brutish", etc. other gendered terms as a way to demean them and take away their femininity. So your comment really touched my heart and I'm glad that other people understand the movie as I do. My mom is a carbon copy of Evelyn in the movie, right down to her mannerisms and immigrant mindset. I have my own problems with her and allow people to discuss their gripes with her to me, but one thing I have always disliked is when people compare her to a man and call her unwomanly, when in reality she is the most feminine woman I know. The only difference is that like Evelyn, she is very assertive and takes her work very seriously, which for some reason makes people (both men AND women) feel comfortable calling her masculine insults. This aligns with the whole "decoupling positive and negative traits from any form of gender binary." In the movie, Evelyn is such a feminine-coded character, and her experience as an asian woman/mother is what makes her strong, but flawed as well. She is hard-working and wants to provide for the family, but is incredibly stubborn and overly insensitive. Yes, both men and women can have these exact qualities, but this movie was able to capture the experience of an Asian immigrant mother so vividly that I was honestly shocked. What a wonderfully complex character that has captured our attention! And of course I love how Waymond is never immasculated in the view of the narrative like so many movies do. He is portrayed as a gentle, communicative soul that also just wants the best for his family. Love this movie and its consideration towards gender norms.

[@mija6116]

I love how in the beginning of the movie all Waymond wants is to talk with Evelyn about their marriage, but they never get around to it. And then in the end, when Evelyn is surprised and like "What did you do?" he just says "I talked to her". Everytime I watch this movie I start crying at his monologue and can´t stop until the end.

[@ziggykatz12]

I totally didn’t catch that! Damn this movie is awesome.

[@Jen-lc3lp]

I don't get the meaning of it

[@Isiauwuehrifi]

@@Jen-lc3lp way one never had to change what he was doing in order to resolve anything. All he had to do was be kind and that was enough. It took Evelyn and the audience the whole movie to realize that, when the whole time we were thinking that talking won’t do anything

[@Jen-lc3lp]

@@Isiauwuehrifi i got it now!thank you🫶

[@elizabethperry2622]

“The day my husband served me papers, I drove my Kia Fiat through my neighbor’s living room wall” might be one of the sadder statements uttered in film. One of the best arcs is Evelyn realizing her perceived foe in Deidre is at her grouchy impenetrable heart a kindred spirit

[@Didi-wq8hw]

The universe in which Waymond and Evelyn dont move to America together felt a lot like the tragedy in La La Land, except we had definitive proof of what things would have been like the other way.

[@Brainsapper]

In the universe where they are both successful financially, but their personal life is empty and hollow despite the glamour and glitter of their success. In this universe what they lack is Joy

[@screenwatcher949]

i was so worried he was going to be another punching bag male character but he turned out to be the soul. very rare

[@jkfecke]

I love what they did with Waymond. It would be so easy for Waymond to win over Evelyn through his Alpha Waymond persona. But it's his fundamental decency that saves her, and by extension the universe. Also, I love Yeoh's final kiss with him -- her acting is amazing in that scene. You really feel how smitten she is with him -- him, her silly husband who puts googly eyes on everything, and who is perfect the way he is.

[@user-yg1ik1qq4l]

I cried through the entire movie. It's so beautiful.

[@Tallie602]

He is the epitome of the female gaze. I love Waymond. He is truly my favorite character ever.

[@basicsimp8798]

Sad reality is people like Waymond are mocked or look down upon by other men, claiming they're too meek, and not assertive enough as a man. Fighting with kindness doesn't sound like a manly thing to do. As a man who relates to Waymond a lot, I hope this wasn't true but it is especially during this times.

[@Meraxes6]

It takes an incredible amount of strength to fight the way Waymond does. People like him will save the world

[@psyrmc]

We need more Waymonds in this world.

[@ebukaobieri]

Women engage in their fare share of mocking these types of men as well. Lmao

[@danielam9520]

dont ever change :)

[@Hekateras]

@@ebukaobieri That is true. It's a culture-wide brainrot that needs to be challenged on all fronts.

[@thanhson1401]

Ke just won the oscar for this role, I'm so happy for him, he delivered one of the best male role model ever presented in cinema history. I imagine Waymond every time I think of a secure attachment person, and learn a lot from his actions.

[@DariaElGrellPozina]

I rarely cry while watching something, just get teary and choked up. I cried through the whole third part of the movie because I liked Waymond from the beginning (come on, googly eyes and "the clothes are happier upstairs" is so wholesome), felt bad that he was constantly getting dismissed with his persistent effort to make things better and was just begging for Joy and Evelyn to notice his approach instead of bouncing nihilism and pessimism off of each other. I don't know when or how I formed the opinion that true kindness is the hardest path because it requires a kind of a freefall. You put in effort not to lash out and not to dismiss and to empathise whithout any guarantee that you will be given the same treatment. And positive thinking is a skill that requires effort and practive that is often very hard. And still gets dismissed as naivete (and sometimes it is, but often the kindest people are the saddest). I love Waymond, I love that his family saw him for who he is and his marriage and his love got a second chance

[@MrBoDiggety]

Well said

[@matthewjenkins7488]

“This is how I fight” is one of the most beautiful quotes I’ve ever heard in a film.

[@Pinoygirl981]

My dad really reminds me of Waymond. He is kind to everyone he meets and supports my mom who, herself, is a very strong character. I was just bawling the whole time watching this movie because all I could see was my dad. I love him so much and I wish everyone is fortunate to have someone like him in their life.

[@estherpettigrew3042]

Treasure that!!! It’s rare in this world.

[@TheloniousDrake7]

I was recently told that I have an overwhelming need to be right that transcends need to be kind. I completely agree that I had a character Arc because I wish to be kinder thanks to Waymond

[@lorix4208]

Here after he won the award, well deserved.

[@Juliemariak]

I love what you said about us pitying "Business Waymond." I feel like the "alpha" ideology is partially built upon the idea that men who are strong enough, smart enough, skilled enough, (aka alpha enough) to climb to the top of the social ladder will be happy, successful, fulfilled, and will also "get the girl." The idea that "Business Waymond" is the most successful version of Waymond but is unfulfilled and alone, despite being "at the top," is so subversive to me.

[@danielbernardo1315]

I grew up picked on, but like some weird joke I was kind and deescalating despite being bigger and stronger for my age. I always felt so conflicted and even weak for not wanting to fight back, not wanting to bring myself to visit harm and ugliness on another person. I saw the emasculated beta male imagery of the Asian American man in all the media around me and felt like it was mocking me. Telling me I’m inherently a comic relief character at best or just plain wrong at worst. Then, many years late I see a character like Waymond Wong deliver that beautiful speech in the theaters. It was everything I’d ever believed in finally affirmed for me. And I cried while my fiancé gripped my hand as she whispered “he’s just like you, and that’s why I love you.” I am confident this movie has done the same for so many people.

[@garywong2700]

What ur fiancé said to you is beautiful

[@liaiscoolsunflower7506]

That’s beautiful 😭

[@celinechang1157]

I said this to my partner as well !!

[@marselo1316]

I’m at school rn and u really gon make me cry like that

[@machinesexnoise]

whenever i feel sad, hopless and feel myself becoming little more nihilistic, i come to this video to remind myself why i need to be kind to people around me. thank you so much for this breakdown.

[@darkhoursofday6250]

I love this video and agree 100%. Waymond is the John Wick of kindness.

[@Aosoramame]

Watched this with my mom who is a tiger mom with 2 failed marriages, with borderline narcissistic tendency, she couldn't understand the movie's message and thought it was over the top with stupid resolve at the end. While I secretly hiding my tears because I relate so much to her kid's pain and waymond.

[@bi1itis]

My mom's the same way, I think all of the lessons of this movie would be lost on her as she is narcissistic and probably has undiagnosed BPD...a personality shield that may have been necessary to survive her marriage. Unfortunately, we can't put in the work that parents need to do to fix themselves. I wish you luck, and the fact that you understand and take this movie's message to heart means you're already the best thing she's ever done for the future!

[@pedinhuh16]

I'm afraid your mom is broken, the movie's message is loud and clear but it requires the viewer to have a bit of empathy and kindness for others, which narcissists does not have.

[@FoulFlip]

All the asian moms are like this. Its just that generation. They dont know better. But like the movie says: be kind

[@cheesewithxbread]

@@FoulFlip It's not all Asian moms. Its actually universal when you discuss with folks across the racial spectrum

[@daylightchim127]

@@bi1itis "you're already the best thing she's ever done for the future" is such a beautiful statement

[@anuragC819]

Waymond's character and speech fundamentally changed the way I view life. For a long time I used to think that to be strong, to be a MAN, all you need to do is to silently bear the pain. I think there are a lot of us who have been called naive or childish for being optimistic and gradually turned cynical. I would only see the worst case and prepare myself for the worst. When Waymond says his outlook is the way he fights in life, something inside me broke, man. I was openly weeping. Even right now writing this, I remember the scene and get goosebumps. Rarely does a film come so packed with not only entertainment but philosophy. Loved the film, loved Ke. Waymond is certainly Top 5 character all time for me

[@patrickchuan4550]

You will need to be 3 times stronger to be kind.

[@craigmartin1975]

Waymond... wow. I've watched his monologue so many times and cried each time. The creators of this movie helped me to understand and love myself a little more. Thank you.

[@danieltukiguerra2839]

As a trans man with two "traditionally masculine" dads and a toxic masculine environment I always had and still have the fear of not being "manly" enough in the eyes of others, Television didn't help either since all the characters I liked were seen as weird, weak and/or effeminate, I forced myself to be more like a "man", be more aggressive, foul spoken, selfless and learned to hide my emotions in front of others even though i was still "feminine" when i was alone but since i saw EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE my vision of the world changed, waymond helped me to accept that I shouldn't change my way of being to satisfy others, that even if the world is cruel to me, I can make the world a better place and more than anything, waymond taught me that what other men consider weakness and/or femininity make me stronger and more able to live a happy life as my true self.

[@martinjugolin2087]

Yeah yeah, you say all this and Waymond too but is until violence comes to you when your kindness and empathy stop working and all you have left is either self defense or death. Pacifism only works in Undertale, not real life. Forget about being a real man and stuff, the truth is if you expect that all can be solved through love and kindness the I'm afraid you'll be disappointed. Violence and tough love do work

[@danieltukiguerra2839]

@@martinjugolin2087 It is easy to think that violence is inevitable, that some day we will experience it, which is true, but the thing is, we can make choices, we can choose to be kind, to not fight, to stop violence (doesn't mean we shouldn't protect ourselves, of course we should, but that doesn't mean we are violent, it means we're protecting ourselves and others from violence that is perpetuated by bad people); violence will always exist because violent people exist but the world doesn't doesn't have to be that way, we can live our lives helping others, spreading positivity and making the world a better place, maybe it won't change the people that think violence is the answer to everything but it will unite those who are kind and want a better world. Being kind is hard because we're always seeing the worse of humanity, wars and murders, bullying and r*pe, the unreasonable hate we have for one another for the most stupid reasons; there are people that are genuinely evil, without any kind of reason, but there's also others who are evil because they don't know any better, people that are scare to be kind because no one has ever been kind to them, because no one has ever care for them, and they become what they know, they get sad for what they don't have and they get jealous for what other have and they get angry of other people's happiness "if I can't be happy then why can they"? It's never bad to be that person that helps people that need and want help, company, support and/or love, and there is always a chance that person can change. So I do think pacifism can work but only on people that want to listen and want change.

[@martinjugolin2087]

@@danieltukiguerra2839 pacifism only works in movies and games and religion, in reality you just die trying

[@ApexGale]

@@martinjugolin2087 You sort of missed the entire point if you think "everything can be solved with love and kidness" was the message Waymond gave. He literally outright says he knows it seems naive. It isn't because he genuinely believes kindness will save the world. It is because it gives him peace of mind in this indifferent world of ours. If he caves to the negative aspects of life, he becomes a nihilist no better than Jobu. His point is that meaning has to be found by you and you alone, and he chooses to fight back against the cruelty of the world by opting to be kind instead. It gives his life meaning. He opts not to dwell on the negatives and focus on spreading positivity. Because at the end of the day - nothing does matter in the overall scope of things. But why should that detract from our lives? Waymond has decided that for him specifically, his relationship with Evelynn and his family is "something that matters."

[@starcherry6814]

The thing is people like Waymond get burned out overtime from people's cruelty We need to appreciate people like Waymond more often and give back to them more often

[@jack90054]

And Waymond was indeed treated cruelly, by his own wife no less! For Years! Yet thoroughout it all, he never changed, never stopped being kind and supportive to her and others. That alone, is more manly than any “alpha male” can ever be.

[@nkbujvytcygvujno6006]

@@jack90054 If by manly you mean brave, steadfast, and true-to-self. Remember, saying “manly” for these things makes it seem like it’s a “man” thing, instead of something not limited to any gender. Women don’t become more “man”-like whenever they have these qualities, and they obviously never had a deficit in the first place for being women. This type of language does still perpetuate sexism.

[@ma.2089]

@@nkbujvytcygvujno6006 your point is valid. But remember, when combating certain beliefs, ppl will use the same language to communicate their point. By utilizing sexist language to contradict the original beliefs, it can help those who are sexist understand the point being made better. Esp since all of this stems from toxic masculinity and masculine insecurity. Hence, they need to tell those ppl that kind men aren’t less “manly” for having traits that are less “feminine”, and more “human”.

[@nkbujvytcygvujno6006]

@@ma.2089 I know, obviously. But the language still perpetuates sexism, too, which is why I added my note.

[@justthetruth3950]

I feel like that's part of the final message, it's not easy to live like that, like he said, it's strategic, that's how you fight

[@lucanuscervus381]

I especially love how gosh darn resistant the movie is to fascist misreadings, particularly when compared to other great action films like the Matrix. It’s possible to enjoy the stylistic violence of the Matrix completely independently of its director’s intended message, and to take away from the film a kind of fascistic disregard for the lives of the “blue-pilled” masses. This kind of separation of style from content is impossible in Everything Everywhere. It’s tough to strike the right balance! The more a film tries to close off alternative readings, the more it edges towards the territory of polemics and propaganda, and this leads to the eternal struggle between the need for art to be open to complexity and nuance, but also relevant and meaningful to its audience, to “have something to say”. This is especially prevalent in satire - to be effective, and different from other forms of rhetoric, satire needs a degree of openness and requires work on the part of its audience - but this makes some amount of misreadings inevitable. Stephen Colbert was invited to host a press dinner during the Bush administration precisely because his comedy was misread by some administration members who mistook his anti-liberal harangues at face value, rather than as acts of parody.

[@theMoporter]

It's worth pointing out that the norm of art NEEDING to avoid a clearly-stated message is very new, even in Europe. Consider that the most celebrated works of Europe stated their messages to the audience. Most remembered Greek play, Dante Alighieri, Shakespeare, etc. all spoke directly to the audience with explicit morals that were to be followed. The "subtlety only" approach pushed in 20th century America was a campaign to frame Soviet Realism as propagandistic polemics. This was reinforced by McCarthism and the Hayes Code, which forced leftisr artists to censor any offensive plots or details through obfuscation. Satire was a critical technique in that. This is why we the Marvel movie dialectic approach feels so new to Hollywood: direct criticism and discourse was effectively banned from the mainstream until now. I'm not saying it's bad or fashy for messages to be implicit rather than explicit, but rather, that we should question why clear messaging is so offensive to our sensibilities.

[@lucanuscervus381]

​@@theMoporter Thank you, I didn't consider that point at all! What you're talking about is a bit like the discourse around "language/tone policing" isn't it? When our aesthetic sensibilities limit certain modes of expression like the ones you've listed, then they surely bias us towards to the status quo, and shut down anger and moral outrage that may be quite justified. But, to defend myself, I wasn't trying to draw a contrast between subtle/unsubtle, but between art and propaganda. You bring up Shakespeare, and I'd ask you whether it's the "explicit morals" in his plays that we remember him for, or the unresolved questions he asks? We don't read Shakespeare today for his (pretty dated but boldly stated) views on gender in the comedies, but to ask what Julius Caesar has to tell us about political violence and demagoguery. His stuff endures because its "openness" allows it to be transposed onto current events and to speak to our concerns today. He was capable of saying many things at once, of speaking in multiple registers to many different audiences, and this texture is what makes art different from propaganda; propaganda squashes reality down, flattens morality. We're awash in advertising, and our reflexive aversion to persuasion comes from this as much as our politics. Waymond is a sincere, unambiguous, morally driven character - and I don't think any of us would characterize his role as "propagandistic," because of the way his appeal to kindness is framed. His quavering tone perfectly captures the fragility of kindness, and the awareness that - yeah - it's probably a little naïve, but he has the courage to do it anyway. It really moved me. Sorry, I don't follow about the marvel dialectic - what's that?

[@theMoporter]

@@lucanuscervus381 I'm glad you responded like this, it's a really interesting discussion! It's absolutely not to say Shakespeare's plays (in general) were flat in their theming. The example I know the best is MacBeth, which has an explicitly stated opposition to "ambition", but themes of just/unjust hierarchy, misogyny, the moral neutrality of the supernatural, loyalty etc. are also very clear themes. You could make a royalist reading that class mobility is evil, or a republican reading that this system is bound to destroy itself. You could equally pull a message that hearing out witchcraft at all leads to ones downfall, or view MacBeth's refusal to plan for the Birnam woods moving to Dunsinane a snide comment about the futility of a kingdom that does not respect the environment. Plainly stating messages doesn't have to mean your work has all the depth of a PSA. EEAAO is another good example of explicit messaging and depth going hand-in-hand ☺️ With regards to the Marvel thing, many of their popular movies have a dialectic - a clash of two ideologies that is won by countering the point of the other side. Black Panther is one of the clearest examples of this, with various characters representing views on interventionism. The primary conflict of the story is not about T'Challa's character, but his responses to hearing various opinions on interventionism, and he wins when he can counter Killmonger's through proving his argument flawed. The prevailing ideology of Wakanda was isolationism, this is the thesis. Killmonger's stance is that Wakanda should intervene to the extreme and genocide white people. T'Challa synthesis is that Wakanda should revoke their isolationism and...build youth centres. I'm not saying it's a perfect movie. Nevertheless, movies like that are a big difference from previous superhero movies like Spider-Man 1/2/3, which are about Peter learning to overcome his temptation to use his powers for personal gain. There's no meeting of the minds as far as the plot is concerned - the villains are obviously incorrect and evil. Peter never doubt that. He has to learn that these villains are bad because they let their demons rule them. It is still a political stance to villainise scientists who create weapons to achieve wealth and clout, or who use externally acquired power to seek vengeance, but there is no attempt to sde their side as anything but unambiguously the wrong path to the point of omitting a political discussion. I love the Raimi Spider-Man films (mostly), it isn't a criticism, this is just an example of the type of narrative that Hollywood prefers!

[@rodrigosebastianpagano8198]

Very interesting. I was amazed with the fans of The Boys simping for Homelander. This movie avoid the awful readings without any effort.

[@hollandscottthomas]

@@theMoporter That's a really interesting perspective to consider! Personally, I tend to like things to not be explicit because I like to kind of tease out meaning from subtleties and implications. BUT I also really enjoy Vonnegut, who will often just outright state his intended point ahead of any of the story so that it can't be misinterpreted and this somehow achieves the same effect but in a roundabout way.

[@EganCraft]

To be honest, I’ve been a cynic who always thought of violence and strength as necessary to deal with unpredictablity in the people around me as I was always afraid of being bullied, but as I’ve grown as a person, martial artist, and friend, I’ve realized that the best self defense is to understand your opposition and adapt to them to avoid conflict. Being kind and empathetic towards those who are aggressive without submitting has been far more effective in keeping me and those around me safe and out of conflict and I’m able to do this without throwing a single punch. Now I can be confident interacting without those around me by being myself and being kind to others while supporting myself using the strength and knowledge I’ve gained, I believe that I’ve finally found the balance and peace within myself

[@zitronentee]

Funny thing is, Art of War by Sun Tzu emphasizes on avoiding conflict when possible. But most people, especially Americans, missed this and only look for how to win.

[@bookwormd8627]

I cried like 5 separate times in this movie. I don’t remember exactly which point, but I do know that I bawled like a baby when Waymond told Evelyn that he is a fighter too, just in a different way. And you can bet that I cried when Evelyn told Waymond “I’m learning to fight like you.”

[@luispereztasso]

I went to see the movie with my gf. We love each other of course, but she uses to be the more "assertive" and a little bit violent in most situations. I...think I'm kinda too empathetic to most people but that's just how I was raised (my mom always tells the story about how in kindergarten the first thing I did was to hug the first classmate I saw, but then he pushed me and throwed me to the ground, leaving me absolutely confused, but not sad. Still hugging to this day). Just that day, the guy who served me popcorn and sodas made a mistake and gave my gf's soda without ice. We noticed and my gf rushed to almost looked at him with a death face and demanded to be fixed. I was behind her and after she left I told him that "don't worry, we all make mistakes, she just had a bad day at work". I saw how his face relaxed a bit. When we saw the movie and Waymond's resolution showed, and Evelyn said "I'm learning to fight like you", she started to cry. She looked at me in silence and I just hugged her kissed her head. After the show we went across the snack store. My gf was really embarrased of what happened before and runned to apologize to the guy. He looked at us saying that "we don't worry" and gifted some m&m's secretly and opened the door really kindly. In some kind of way, I often act really empathetic becasue, in all kind of degrees, I care about everyone I interact with. I know they are people. But at the same time, when I do act kind to others, I know that (of course, not always) they will act kind to me. I'm not referring to material stuff, just a smile, a kinder tone of voice, a stronger "thank you" or "good bye" are good enough for me. After we left the cinema my gf said "you know? you're really special." I understood what she meant after all what happened. It was a really good day. This is a really good movie guys, you have no idea.

[@bevrosity]

wow, that's really awesome!

[@jimbolic0809]

Great story. This movie is the best movie.

[@ashleyt5362]

You know a movie is phenomenal when it truly makes one think of their own behavior and changes it for the better. Great story. I hope your gf continues to show more empathy and kindness towards you and others.

[@sorrycho]

Ty for sharing this beautiful story. I'm sobbing all over again 😭😭

[@jacobhilliker2359]

I watched this movie with my ex and saw a lot of myself in Waymond, even when he was a “bad guy” early on. In the relationship I often felt like I was a man-child who was a pushover and not contributing to anything, even when I thought I was pulling as much weight as I could handle. But I’d also try to “fight with kindness.” Ultimately it didn’t work out largely because I felt too much like the “pathetic Waymond,” but now I am making sure to build up my confidence and make sure I’m being more like the “kind fighter” :)

[@TianZhaoHeavenlyFortune]

As an East Asian (Chinese) male in Canada who relates more to Waymond, I cannot agree more with everything you've expressed here. Everyone Everywhere totally needs Waymond Wang, thank you very much for this! Teared up by the end of this analysis, I honestly can't believe I'm living in this day and age to see not only movies like this exist in Hollywood but people like you who can provide such an analysis - you dude embodied actionable empathy right here for people like me in this world. Thank you once again, this world also needs more White men like you!!! You rock!!!

[@comediangj4955]

This kind of kindness = weak mentality doesn't seem to exist much in east Asia. Growing up in China the kind ones or the nerds are the most popular and adored in school.

[@mliv695]

@@comediangj4955 That's superficial and only limited to schools. It's the same in the big wild world. People always look up to and want to become an alpha male.

[@zitronentee]

@@mliv695 Not really. I observe the alpha male popularity mainly in USA, as a country of capitalism and 'American dream'.