Everything Wrong With Deuteronomy 28 in the Bible

[@michaelmoceri1118]

I laughed embarrassingly loudly at the bit about trying to sell yourself into slavery but no one buying you. That's the weirdest shade to throw at someone.

[@jagartharn]

Be like a prostitute not attracting any John's. That could have been one of the curses too. Damn I'm good.

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

What’s so funny?

[@skepticusmaximus184]

I can only imagine balding, slightly overweight 56 year old me, being sent to the market for sex slavery and pretty young things, being sent to the market on the other side of town, where they sell the hard manual labourers. We'd ALL be useless in someway. 😂

[@oscargordon]

@@Daniel-cz7kd What's so funny? The fact that you don't see why that is so funny.

[@MotivoTrevorn0101]

Which one is worse, listening to the bible and taking action on whatever it says or just living a secular life free from such ill and harm?🙂

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

trevornwright0101 Where and when do you get a secular life free from ill and harm?

[@MotivoTrevorn0101]

@Daniel-cz7kd Just to be honest with you, I use more than 10% percent of my brain to avoid conflict. 😏

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

@@MotivoTrevorn0101 So you use 89% or so of your brain engaging in conflict, how does that get you a secular life free from ill and harm?

[@harshitgarg419]

you aren't free from ill and harm just cause you don't believe in God. God exists even without our belief and the fact is that punishment decided by him will still stand whether we like it or not.

[@tygrahof9268]

God will Curse you and plague you...like a pagan witch...pagan witch Goddess is watching you!!

[@ericrietvelt1970]

God is worse than Marvel's Thanos. 😂😂

[@GeraldDeBelen]

He can do things even without a stone. Can do it by merely pronouncements. At least Thanos just wants the half of the world gone. God does seem to have liking to everyone gone* * terms and repentance apply

[@malic_zarith]

Thanos literally seems like a saint by comparison.

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

ericrietvelt1976 You have a point, why it’s better to be on His side😏

[@gide5489]

​@@Daniel-cz7kdbetter to be on the side of an immoral despot? Use your brain.

[@harshitgarg419]

nah, he hates non believers like you and sends them to hell if you don't believe in him even after you meet him in heaven.

[@John73John]

Has anyone counted up how many times it says "the land your Lord is giving you" and pretends as if that land didn't already have people living on it? Before I started studying the bible I thought this idea of manifest destiny was a more recent invention.

[@bladerunner3314]

I'm more astonished that whole nations will come to kick my ass ... I mean, overcompensating much?

[@MrMarinus18]

It was copied again. The Nazi's actually wanted to recreate the success of America and they wanted to enslave the jews. The whole holocaust didn't come until the war was already lost and the whole regime was spiralling into madness. The original plan was that the jews would be slaves like the blacks and the Slavic people would be like the natives. Swept aside so that the land is given to people more 'worthy' of it.

[@rinkuraku5251]

"and the lord will give you an itch that cannot be cured, and it will be in that spot on your back that you cannot reach. And you will be cursed to step on a lego each morning when you rise. And your socks will never match, and your shoes will always be uncomfortable."

[@Irisarc1]

I'm an atheist, so I'm not claiming any of this is real, but that bronze sky, iron earth, and dust everywhere is exactly what it looked like during the Dust Bowl period in the early part of the 20th century. It's too much to describe here. Go look it up. It's fascinating.

[@janwoodward7360]

Matched my thoughts exactly. Straight from the “Goatherders Guide to the Universe”

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

Interesting, you don’t claim any to be real, yet you claim the same described sky in the 20th century

[@Irisarc1]

@@Daniel-cz7kd I said that because I wanted it clear that I am an atheist. That doesn't mean I can't draw a comparison between two things. Are you trying to say you are offended by my comment? If so, let me reiterate: I don't believe any of it is real. It's ancient mythology that some people think is real some reason. I mean, obviously, all the crap Yahweh threatened his people with did not happen, yet modern believers hang on every word as if it was literally true. It has never happened, and after waiting for all this time, it's not very likely to. I guess I should have made it clear that I was saying that the threat from God in this chapter was probably based on real dust storms the author(s) had been through in their time. I am proposing this because I am aware of what the folks who experienced the Dust Bowl went through.

[@williamwilson6499]

Why is it fascinating? Dust/sandstorms happen all around the world…drought also. Humankind is well aware of these phenomena. They look essentially the same now as they did then.

[@Irisarc1]

@@williamwilson6499 The Dust Bowl is not just a dust storm. Like I said, GO LOOK IT UP. It is fascinating. It was not just because there is dust like in other places in the world. It was a historical event. If you didn't make any effort to find anything out about, which it's clear you didn't, and then just popped off about it, it makes you sound ignorant.

[@cosmicqt9647]

Oooooo, so this is where "the head and not the tail" comes from!! This verse is huge within the Word of Faith movement.

[@qbasicmichael]

I love this chapter. Remember, this was written after the siege, destruction, and exile of israel by assyria, and some of it was probably written after the siege, destruction, and exile of judah by babylon. You can imagine jeremiah, or someone, writing curses based on terrible events that had already happened, but framing them as having come from moses in the ancient past. (Remember, the book of deuteronomy was "discovered" by jeremiah's father, hilkiah, during the time of josiah. It was apparently further edited after the destruction of jerusalem in 586bce.)

[@jaegrant6441]

Wow. Thanks for this context:) So, was Hilkiah Joseph Smith's inspiration? :);)

[@allanlarsen3261]

"you will be pledged to be married to a woman, but another will take her and rape her." Only religious people will see the rape of a women solely as being a punishment for her future husband. When she is raped, it is man who suffers. His woman is now damaged goods. How sad for him. What about her, well the bible do not care. Yet another chapter where you can really feel the love of god, and how gods chosen people are soooo lucky to have him in their lives. Even the Pharaoh and people of Egypt did not treat them this badly. The Israelites really went from being slaves to even something worse. Only good thing in this book, is that it fiction.

[@bladerunner3314]

That's why I don't understand people (on the left, yet not necessarily atheist) when they say "I hope this GOP politicians kids will suffer this and that."

[@fordprefect5304]

@@bladerunner3314 *when they say* Who is they? reference please

[@bladerunner3314]

@@fordprefect5304 Like whenever they keep gun laws as they are, some people say shit like "I hope their kids get shot!" And don't tell me people on the left don't say crap like that.

[@bladerunner3314]

​@@Jolomon Tell me you're primitive with too many words.

[@allanlarsen3261]

@@Jolomon I agree with everything you posted above. The bible is a very old text, written for the world as it was back then. I agree. I agree it is outdated for modern times. I agree that most of it was properly not meant to be taken literally. Like the sky would turn to copper and the earth turn to iron, properly mean that the sun would be blocked and the ground become hard, hurting farming and ranching. A serious threat back in those times. I agree to all that. What I don't agree to, is Christians still claiming that the bible is the foundation of morals, that the bible should be the guiding point of our lives. That the bible was written by a good ever loving god. That the bible is all true. If believers would just admit that the bible is not all true, and should not be taken literally. That it is a book of stories, some of which contain a few good points which they chose to cherry pick and follow in their lives. That most of what modern Christians believe do not really match with what's in the bible. THEN I would respect them a whole lot more. Christianity would benefit greatly if they did a new revision of the bible. A version as they would have liked it to be, not as it is, then it might actually become a good book to read and base your life upon. But they can't because that would ruin the whole religion aspect. You can't just change the rules of a god now can you. Too bad.

[@omarvasquez6851]

Thank you god for the inflammation curse. Now I know where my rheumatoid arthritis came from.

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

omarvasquez6851 That’s in a way true, though why would you wanna thank god?

[@skepticusmaximus184]

​@@Daniel-cz7kdCan't you understand sarcasm? But thanks for your sensible contribution to the discussion. 🙄

[@skepticusmaximus184]

I was just taking my daily dose of Ibuprofen as Hemmet was reading this part. I hardly notice this holly curse of arthritis, thanks to "SCIENCE BITCHES... IT WORKS".

[@roncurilla6991]

God doesn't seem so loving and good when you actually read the bible, new and old.

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

roncurilla6991 On the contrary, read and learn to understand the Bible and God is loving and good, only people want God to be or do what they want and not who God really is.

[@markbeoluke6454]

It seems like the writers of the book of Deuteronomy seem to have a bad case of Stockholm Syndrome. "Oh no! Why do these powerful nations conquer us? God must be mad at us and punishing us! We totally deserve it! We would have been invulnerable if we would have kept all those laws! We must still praise God while we despair!"

[@AmityvilleFan]

You know, all those threats get really boring after a while, no matter how creative someone turns to.

[@TheEyez187]

Sounds just like Hellraiser: Revelations! The original Pinhead will tear your soul apart; but in the last franchise entry, it was just as you said; became a ridiculous tryh!ard

[@KeriRautenkranz]

Perhaps Moses, being aware that "God" is going to murder him soon, is trying to eke out a few more days of survival by making more stuff up?

[@willievanstraaten1960]

They want us to worship a sociopath. This is true.

[@thomasgregory4871]

Aaahhhh, the old "Love me or else!!" maneuver.

[@skepticusmaximus184]

20:11 "The lord will send you back in ships to Egypt." Ooooh! A free holiday to Egypt. I've always wanted to see the pyramids. 😁

[@PrinceLenail]

Egypt means bondage if you look up the actual etymology of that word. What people were put into slavery on ships?

[@dragowolfraven3806]

Moses is the worst tour guide ever.

[@jstube36]

I thought God took no pleasure in the suffering of his people. Apparently he gets great joy especially if he is the one causing the misery. Answering the eternal question. Why does God allow evil? Because either he uses it to test people, or he is inflicting it himself. Another interesting note. Those, of that time, who see the misery of their fellow Israelite will assume it being the curse of God.

[@MarkAhlquist]

All the ridiculous threats remind me of Maga campaign ads

[@roncurilla6991]

Bingo, winner winner.

[@doraduplessis2727]

I like what you said: People who obey out of fear, not people who follow out of respect."

[@davidcanatella4279]

Dear God, please bestow upon me the fruit of the loom for thy under garments hath become holy and may you turn all thine enemies into happy hippies

[@effwitt]

Thank you for the reading and analysis! It inspired me to make an appointment with a local tattoo parlor to get a "God is Love" neck tat in an ornate script font.

[@armyparty]

Thank you for these videos

[@user-fu4wy5il5v]

Jesus says Obey God if you love me, But instead no matter if i hate that instructions from God ,I'll have to Obey God from fear of sending me in hell

[@youtubestudiosucks978]

Dont you first need evidence that any sorts of god exist? Let alone specific evidence that only applies to your god? Do you have those 2 things? If you do then can you provide the evidence alongside any testing you've done so that it can be repeated and concluded wether or not you are telling the truth?

[@willievanstraaten1960]

Sleep more in the morning and super energetic in the evening. That’s me.

[@magnuslinde9543]

God loves you, it's so clear now!

[@hannahevertson8306]

Love how I got an ad for an app to cover my lock screen in Bible verses on this video. How appropriately placed

[@michaelmccarthy4077]

"in Leviticus 26 we were told that...the sky would be like iron and the ground becoming bronze, why did they get switched" are you saying there are errors in God's divine word? Inconceivable.

[@lora4624]

i would really like to hear a Christian explain that

[@brunozeigerts6379]

The Hebrews are probably wondering, 'Is there another god we can worship? Or at least another prophet we can talk to?'

[@willj1598]

I feel like they were probably wanting to renegotiate their contract pretty early on. In fact, more than once they said they were better off in Egypt.

[@visaman]

Oh, there were several. Just off the top of my head there was: Elohim, Adonai, YHWH, Ehyeh-Asher-Ehyeh, Shaddai, Tzevaot.

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

brunozeigerts6379 Where did you get that idea?

[@willj1598]

@@Daniel-cz7kd Daniel, I know you have been following the story along with us. The original commenter need not wonder. The story explicitly states that they kept worshipping other gods. The main god in this story kept telling them not to do it. He threatened to kill them if they did. Sometimes he did kill a bunch of them for it. The god in this story is an evil dictator that perpetrated genocide on these people. The only good thing is that it didn't happen because it is fiction.

[@brunozeigerts6379]

@@Daniel-cz7kd Again, you don't understand humour. Basically, if you're a Hebrew being given all these bizarre commandments, wouldn't you wonder if there were some other god you could worship? Or, since it all comes from Moses, ask if there's another prophet you can talk to. Since you'd wonder whether he's just making it up as he goes.

[@rcblazer]

Oh hey, America IS in the Bible! It gets mentioned in Deuteronomy 28 49-52. 😆

[@ComposeALot]

true dat

[@PinkyJay-ow4mj]

Unfortunately 😟

[@cinnamonsplash]

"like an eagle swooping down" is definitively the most American way to describe an invasion lmao The only thing missing is "They will claim to bring freedom upon you."

[@kelvinlion8839]

These threats feel hilariously out of date. Oh no! Not my ox! Not my olive trees!

[@visaman]

The ox was their tractor. Where do you think Olive Oil comes from?

[@pfefferfilm]

OMG Deuteronomy 28: 12-14 is proof! "The Lord will make you the head, not the tail" PRAISE BE TO WILFORD AND HIS ENGINE ETERNAL!

[@dovrosenschein147]

And another thing: a bunch of these curses definitely haunt me with images of Holocaust documentary footage, people like my great-grandfather in Buchenwald straining under the weight of piling a cartfull of shit with an iron yoke around their next - starvation, agony. Some synagogues when reading this chapter have the reader rush quietly through these curses. Others say all of these curses have already happened to us, so read it aloud. And atheism is not what brings about these curses - you can be a perfectly good atheist and still please God by putting out justice and kindness out into the world. Plenty of so-called Christians knowingly violate every commandment God had just mentioned in chapter 27 - they who rape and pillage and plunder, who abuse and take bribes, deserve these curses

[@tiredofliars]

Arggghghhhhh, I missed the live show. To make it up, I am asking everyone to hit that LIKE button, can we get this to 100,000 likes?

[@aristotlespupil136]

Wouldn't it be fun to find any of these divine blessings or curses in a fortune cookie? 'You will plant olive trees but the olives will drop off before you can turn them into oil' or ' 'you'll get an itch that cannot be cured' or 'your future: cannibalism'

[@KeriRautenkranz]

The Chinese are far too civilized for such an endeavor but perhaps one could sell Fortune Communion Wafers with such messages baked inside? Church attendance would skyrocket!

[@malic_zarith]

This sounds like the craziest megalomaniacal villian rant a person could possibly come up with.

[@karlharrison6544]

Does anyone know how many times the phrase "the Lord your God" appear in the Bible? It would make one hell of a drinking game.....

[@KeriRautenkranz]

This video should be required viewing material for all that profess belief in The Hebrew War God...

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

And why should it be?

[@ActiveAdvocate1]

PS: Hemant, if God ever does strike you blind for being an Atheist, I PROMISE I'll teach you Braille. There's a myth that only, like, 10% of blind people have Braille literacy, but it's a lot higher than that, because literacy is f*cking important, thank you.

[@fordprefect5304]

* if God ever does strike you blind for being an Atheist* Is your god going to have the Easter Bunny hit him in the eyes with eggs?

[@ActiveAdvocate1]

@@fordprefect5304, honey, honey, it's called irony. I don't believe in this Biblical mess of a god any more than Hemant does. I'm not an Atheist, but I am NOT an Abrahamic.

[@roncurilla6991]

Stop being a God loving hater.

[@maggiebarrett7300]

⁠@@ActiveAdvocate1Out of curiosity, what are your non atheistic beliefs?

[@ActiveAdvocate1]

@@maggiebarrett7300, Pantheism in the Advaita Vedanta school, but I'm not a Hindu, either.

[@defesan]

"The beatings will continue until morale improves." - God, apparently

[@Alamo-316-editz-whatever]

I can't wait to see what stupid things the Bible has to say next!

[@Daniel-cz7kd]

Alamo-316 Try reading the Bible, if you’re literate😏

[@Alamo-316-editz-whatever]

​​@@Daniel-cz7kd I have, I was Christian, it was a joke I was clearly being sarcastic. I also just like hearing this guys opinion on this stuff

[@darrenwilliams4938]

I hope all the 'God of free will' Dingbats watch this chapter.

[@Cookie-ri9pz]

Thanks! Love your work and the great commentary.

[@FriendlyAtheist1]

Thank you!

[@lh1673]

The cruelness in this book, no wonder this God didn’t care the Dark Ages torturous punishment people were doing. How could’ve God that say I am the truest not intervened to stop, end it those days! Unbelievable!

[@wilberwhateley7569]

The authors of this chapter could have just wrote “obey the rules we attribute to our deity - or else…”

[@KeriRautenkranz]

This seems a bit like the Monty Python interpretation of the Spanish Inquisition.... "...Cardinal Fang, Poke her with the Soft Cushion!" "No! Not the Soft Cushion!..."

[@willj1598]

They need to put a nice little rainbow on their tops and bottoms sign to remind them of god's covenant with them.

[@MK-lh3xd]

Every body wears mixed yarn fabric now. I guess we are due for another global flooding.

[@RozzmanLists]

nice summary! Thank you 🙂

[@thomasfplm]

Having the ground be iron would be quite good economically, imagine buying any really cheap land and instantly being able to produce and sell lots of iron to industries. And just a fun fact, the city I live basically has hematite as ground and soil, and the region I live is a quite big producer of iron.

[@sadderwhiskeymann]

WHAT A LOVING GAWD 🙏 I never understood what makes the neighbouring nations "THE enemy* I mean sure, they were worshipping the "wrong" gawds, but what about enlighten them (yeah, 🤮, disgusting as it may be) i assume plenty would convert to save their lives) What am i missing???

[@MatthewCaunsfield]

It seems the authors enjoyed writing the "curses" section far more than the "blessings" part

[@skepticusmaximus184]

Yeah but curses also double as blessing for the 'in group' of narcissistic haters, who get right off on the shadenfraude of their threats.

[@timothymulholland7905]

This written by rabbis to ancient Hebrews who never heard of Christianity or the New World. The idea was to force conformity. It seems to have worked.

[@tealx8462]

The Old Testament sure is concerned with Egypt!!!

[@tygrahof9268]

If you obey MAN'S LAWS, and conform to our religious man created regulations. It is a manifesto...

[@leoaguinaldo65]

13:06 | I belong to the Brown people. Thank you, Hemant, for mentioning it. I suddenly felt light, happy, and proud.

[@Aury]

So uh...how are christians supposed to know if they are doing the right thing? Here it says that those who are cursed for not obeying will be oppressed and suffer and stuff, then later on its said that those who do obey will be oppressed and suffer and stuff.

[@visaman]

As The Great Prophet, Kenny Rogers (Peace be upon him), once said, "You never count your money When you're sittin' at the table. There'll be time enough for countin' When the dealing's done."

[@JeffreyChadwell]

The verses in Deuteronomy 28:20-24 sound an awful lot like what happened during the Dust Bowl that happened in the early part of the 20th Century. So I guess the Okies somehow really pissed God off back then.

[@elizabethduran3435]

Like Dan Barker said, the god of the Old Testament is the worst character (and the most evil). Good thing he doesn’t exist!

[@shawnsimmons1308]

Somebody please give God a Snicker’s!!

[@robsquared2]

Holy crap 22 minutes.

[@SergeantSkeptic686]

Israelites promised abundant blessings for obedience-none delivered upon-cruel punishments for disobedience and constant bloody animal sacrifices. Always more and more blood. Is this the inspired writing of an omniscient, omnibenevolent God? No, definitely not. How about the strictly human writings of ancient superstitious savage men? Yes, definitely so.

[@brunozeigerts6379]

'And your video service will only stream Ishtar, Batman and Robin, Manos, the Hand of Fate(not the MST3k version either)

[@yawthesceptic5512]

The ending for me 😂😂😂😂😂

[@MaxtheFinger]

Well,... that's bat-shit crazy, isn't it? 🙄

[@thortonnotthecoffeeguy8473]

Was anyone else hearing Alanis Morrissette's song Ironic in their mind's eye through most of that. You will build a house, that you can't live in, And who would have thought... It figures

[@arjenH2Os]

Suddenly the casting of the movie Dogma makes so much more sense 😂

[@kevinstclair7692]

For God so love the world, he enjoy cursing you than blessing you. Being horrible to you than being nice to you. For the love of God is to see you suffer, than seeing you happy. A-men... sound like bad English,...so I'll go with, A-lot-of-men.😅😂😂

[@lh1673]

Thanks for summarizing who this book God actually is😅even after sacrificing himself will just go back to heaven and looks forward to watch the Terrible Signs that he predicted😅which is written in NT. So so LOVE the world but wanted to watch those SIGNS come and see people suffer😢

[@graey24601]

"You will live in constant suspense, filled with dread both night and day, never sure of your life." Sounds exactly like right wing Christians to me.

[@toomuchado]

Thank you for a bible study without the need of a predatory preachers eying the children

[@ActiveAdvocate1]

PS2: See, I imagine this is the benefit of having been a Jain. The Tirtankaras would never dream of pulling this shit, because nonviolence is the name of the game. I love Jainism: if one lives it as a philosophy, rather than a religion, it's a beautiful thing and I see no problems with it, much like philosophical versus religious Daoism.

[@pipersisk3966]

I thought fruit of the womb met placenta not children.

[@oscargordon]

Nah, but in verse 57 you get to eat the placenta also.

[@jagartharn]

🎉Someone I once knew told me that old testament was Gods love letter for us. That's s big red flag for me so I decided to break up with god, jesus and the holy spirit .

[@lh1673]

Same here, also imagine his letter has to be interpreted by many imperfect human and we had to believe it. I regret I did believe it from the Christian org I was in😅

[@ianbraun271]

Non only non-believers will be punished like this, but anyone who doesn't follow ALL the rules GOD has set forth.

[@roncurilla6991]

You keep thinking that. And hope it is true. Because it seems the punishments come to all. In case you haven't noticed.

[@ianbraun271]

@@roncurilla6991 dude, I'm an atheist. I was referring to the fact that Hemant said non-believers and atheists only were the targets of these punishments, but at the start it said anyone who does not follow perfectly these rules (paraphrase). And besides, its not true anyway. I have been an atheist for several years, and a general non-believer for even longer. And I have not suffered 1 jot or tittle of these punishments.

[@cinnamonsplash]

​​​​@@ianbraun271ve you stubbed your toe in these years? Got caught in the rain without an umbrella? Made a cup of tea but then forgot about it for a while and it got all cold and disgusting? That's definitively God, warning you of punishments to come! (/sarcastic)

[@visaman]

Non believers won't be punished. It's the believers who don't obey the Law that will be punished.

[@proanuubis2546]

W8 the foreigner who doesn't know or worship the God of the Bible is doing fine without Bible God. Doesn't that mean we should seek other Gods with a less murdery vibe

[@visaman]

It says in Revelation 12 that there will be a war in Heaven 7 Then war broke out in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. 8 But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven.

[@torquemadatheapostate8768]

Nothing like christian love.

[@lh1673]

Believers, did you know this God always punished, loves to curse human even a snake but not Satan!? Is there any book or chapter where Satan is PUNISHED once and for all? Why did this God even ALLOWED Satan to continually rove around, when this God himself sacrificed on the cross and went back to heaven😮😅this is what I should’ve realized before indoctrinated😅

[@visaman]

Satan doesn't appear until the New Testament.

[@sharkpoolbolt662]

The Israelites were better off being slaves in Egypt. Cuz at least the Egyptians wouldn’t make them resort to cannibalism

[@visaman]

Moses called them stiff necks.

[@freddenker9537]

the easiest way to become an atheist is...to study the bible

[@alanhilder1883]

Only half way through but, Why do these curses sound like what the "repressed christians" claim what the nasty "others" are doing to them? Could it be that God is doing these curses to them, not "The Atheists".

[@soyevquirsefron990]

I’ve been an atheist for thirty years and only a couple of those curses have happened. I’m sure it’s coming tho, something will destroy me sooner or later and that will prove this is true.

[@boboak9168]

Aint Yahweh a peach! 🍑

[@backgroundstream]

I wonder why the Bible was discontinued. Nielsen ratings too low or did the writers go on strike?

[@iannhaupt6584]

I laughed my ass off when you said that you are thinking about drinking the alcohol that these bible people were chugging when they wrote this. Hilarious

[@captainpolar2343]

contradictions and punishments... don't you just love worshipping a narcissistic deity (who will kill you 7 times over)?

[@MaryAnnNytowl]

Stopping back by to leave a comment to feed the Almighty Algorithm. 😊

[@laurensdehaan2202]

Good God, but that's SO disgusting! That's the ever-loving God?! Really! Hey, Luci! Luci! Can I come down? PLEASE!?

[@visaman]

Wait until Ezekiel!

[@jonathanmarkoff4469]

This sounds like it was written by a mafia boss.

[@myhorse52]

Are we sure the Christian God isn't Satan?

[@visaman]

That is what the Gnostics believed.

[@wilberwhateley7569]

Hey - don’t smear Satan’s good name by associating him with this control-freak lunatic!

[@Skymannot6939]

Can somebody please check god in a psychiatric hospital, I think he has gone to the deep end.

[@visaman]

Moses you mean. Once he stops talking God will kill him.

[@gregjones2217]

Insanity rules. Disgusting.

[@galloe8933]

Now watch, as I slay Namu’s donkey. Wait, what!? Shut up Namu! I will not shut up, your going to.. Everybody, gather round and hold Namu still, so he can watch me slay his donkey! Donkey slaying sounds, followed by Namu crying loudly in disbelief of what just happened. Yes, yes… Come now everybody, let little baby Namu cry, it is time that we must take his sheep!!! Noooooo!!! Once more, shut up Namu! Look, if don’t stop crying about his dead girlfriend the donkey, we put lipstick on a sheep and make him kiss it! Why, are you doing this to me? Shut up Nemu! The lord told you what would happen.

[@ThatGuy-6669]

Some ppl eat their placenta after birth. It's meant to be high in iron or something. I think it's gross.

[@qbasicmichael]

I think cows do that.

[@sylviekeller4729]

Yep, it is full of proteins, and iron, and a few other things, that were extracted from the woman's body. How terrible of her, she does not want to let people steal even more nutrients from her body during a siege when everyone is starving !

[@georgefleming4956]

🎵 “Thank you God for curing the cataract of Sams mom” 🎵

[@PapaDon46]

Maybe I'm not living right. I've had an itch all week.

[@PinkyJay-ow4mj]

Peejay in the house. 😁👍

[@fordprefect5304]

*Yahweh's record in battle* *Amon Ra* the Egyptian God, Egypt invades sacks and loots Canaan/Israel 1207 BCE and 910 BCE *Hadad* the god of Aram Damascus, invades and sacks the Northern and Southern kingdoms around 825 BCE *Ashur* the Assyrian God, The Assyrians conquer Israel 722 BCE and vassalize's Judah *Marduk* the Babylonian God, Babylon conquers Judah 586 BCE *Ahura Mazda* the Syrian God, Syria conquers Judah around 538 BCE *Zeus* the Greek God, Greeks conquer Judah 332 BCE *Jupiter* the Roman God, Takes control around 60 BCE and obliterates Judah around 130 CE Sometimes you make bad choices....

[@jamiegallier2106]

❤❤❤

[@while.coyote]

Deuteronomy 28 has a pretty accurate description of modern-day capitalism.

[@hancocki]

How did you have kids if your fiancée was taken by another guy before you?

[@visaman]

It was common for a man to have several wives back then.

[@hancocki]

@@visaman Yes, however that doesn't jive with the current "biblical" view of marriage so often perpetuated by Christians

[@visaman]

@@hancocki yes, that was a result of the gay rights movement. Jerry Farwell coined the phrase, "God created Adam & Eve, not, Adam & Steve." Then it morphed into Traditional Biblical Marriage.

[@jhill4874]

Sounds like prosperity ministries.