ex-psychic exposes she was never really psychic.

Try Curology out for yourself! curolo.gy/nicoleraf
✧( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)✧ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) she was a scammer! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)✧ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)✧
resources if you think you may have OCD: iocdf.org/ocd-finding-help/ot...
hello hello lil cherubs! in today's video i touch on a very important topic to me which is...OCD! surprise surprise. for many years, i was dealing with magical thinking and severe OCD without ever knowing. through the guidance of OCD support and therapy, i've been able to realize, i was never truly psychic, and instead had OCD that was controlling my life. i feel it's important to share since OCD is so stigmatized and misunderstood. love u lots xoxo nikki nasty
stalk me here but not actually
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my podcast
☞ Talk Nasty To Me
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☞shop the things used in this video:
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☞music used
On a Bus - Baseball Gregg
Lovers Rock - TV Girl
dan universe - off the wall
Buttercup - Jack Stauber
☞FAQs:
How old are you? 23
What's your ethnicity? half polish & half iranian
What equipment do you use to film?
☞ canon m50: go.magik.ly/ml/zy8y/
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☞ on camera mic: go.magik.ly/ml/zy91/
☞ voiceover mic: go.magik.ly/ml/zy92/
☞ tripod: go.magik.ly/ml/zy94/
☞ editing software: final cut pro x
Enjoy videos every week on whatever I choose to pull out of this lil noggin of mine.
if you like this video, check out these videos too:
playlist of all my videos from the beginning of time: bit.ly/2Gnco8M
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/ nicolerafiee
#ocd #nicolerafiee #nikkinasty

[@god_7594]

This reminds me of when I got into witchcraft/psychic/tarot cards because I felt like something was communicating with me, but it turns out my pattern recognition and "do this, not that, or something bad will happen" was just my autism 😭

[@Tree-House69]

Mood

[@anahand4137]

As an ocd and spectrum girlie, wow, does this speak to me.

[@baconmeido7037]

😭😭

[@brycebrown6601]

for real its always the autism/pattern recognition for me

[@jupitersspell]

Those things are real, but you will never find truth in them if you don’t actually understand it. The synchronicities can be really marveling but true gnosis doesn’t come from superficial signs

[@mxngos7493]

You helped me realize that I had OCD actually, just got diagnosed a few days ago. You made me realize my intrusive thoughts and immense self guilt were not a result of me being a "bad person" and that I should genuinely look into OCD symptoms. I'm so thankful you talked about what OCD has been like for you, because I would've never gotten the help I need!

[@meliodys]

NAUR BC SAME

[@rx500android]

As someone who struggled with OCD since an early age, I’m so proud of you that you finally recognized your behaviors, their root and got a diagnosis ❤️ it’s not easy, especially with all the stigma and misconceptions surrounding this disorder- But just remember that you’re not a bad person, just as you said. Your thoughts aren’t you. Let them pass and take care of yourself ❤️❤️ sending love

[@nutsucker30001]

fr. although i haven’t been diagnosed with ocd, i find a lotta correlations with the personal suffering and guilt i go through on the daily with nicole’s experience with ocd. Ive only stumbled on her channel a couple of days ago, but this subtle relatability and this ability to figure myself out slowly thru this channel has made me a fan instantly.

[@lalalallalalallalala]

SAME

[@AdeliaCreates]

SAME but a few weeks ago.

[@mother_of_wasps]

Funny story, watching this made me realize why I thought I was telekinetic when I was younger. I would focus on something and I'd see it vibrate/move in small ways. Probably a decade later, I've been diagnosed with bipolar 1 and one of my common hallucinations is seeing things, especially walls, move/vibrate in small ways.

[@baileyj7968]

I used to think I had x ray vision but it turns out that my eyes are messed up in a specific way that gives me really bad double vision, so I could “see through” the doubled object

[@camilleons]

@@baileyj7968omg i have crazy double vision bc my eyes are messed up too

[@brooket8068]

Uhh wait me too wtfff

[@creditsong7369]

Omg I've never heard anyone else talk about little hallucinations like that. I also have bipolar 1 and I see things move and jiggle all the time. I also see faces out of the corner of my eyes, but my doctor keeps telling me that it's completely normal. Idk what's normal anymore.

[@Bpd._.Tortie]

@@creditsong7369me too wtf 😭

[@Boggythefroggy]

Also you saying your therapist said “religion and baseball are the worst for OCD” made me laugh SO HARD bc my dad (who will never get diagnosed but is very much OCD and has been all of my life) is both religious and has been doing baseball since he was a kid. Now I know why he’s so superstitious with it lmao.

[@kenny995]

I was relgious and played softball as a kid, I was convinced that everything I did effected the outcome of my life and my games. It was so silly looking back 😂

[@mh-tb9lu]

Lmao my ocd dad also loves sports mainly football and basketball, and is very religious (Christianity). I didn’t know this! Neither are really for me. Sometimes I steer away from spiritual things I feel may be unhealthy mentally for me with my conditions tbh.

[@mh-tb9lu]

@@kenny995whoa I didn’t realize that was a symptom.. I still think this way. Omg lol. I definitely try to chill out more. Thought it was just anxiety and how I was raised, didn’t know some of it may be ocd

[@willhockstein119]

I was super religious as a kid, some of which included ideas about psychic powers, and it was definitely bad for my ocd, so real

[@RoseMoon2]

Hey im genuinly curious, why baseball? 😅

[@fullmetalarmpit]

"I woke up so anxious which is very unlike me-" "No it's not, it's actually very like me." she's just like me fr

[@ashtheprofessor]

accepting that i’m not catholic and realizing that means demons aren’t real and my house isn’t haunted helped my OCD so much

[@gewase]

for the longest time religious based intrusive thoughts were the main ones I had, now that there's more things to be anxious about as an adult, I still have all the religious ones, but also a lot more other types so it balances out..ig... 👁👄👁

[@americanppls]

demons and hauntings are real they just have nothing to do with religion. religion was created to try and explain why they exist, just like ancients used to believe in rain, fire, wind, water, "gods" etc.. the Carthaginians used to sacrifice their kids to the sun god to make sure the sun would rise every morning. i personally think they are beings from another dimension. they used to say parallel dimensions didn't exist now they've scientifically proven at least 7-11 different dimensions depending on what you read but they have proven extra dimensions exist so that's my guess as to what these things are.

[@MoonchildDontCry]

I wonder how many religions were created solely because ancient people never got help with their mental illnesses.

[@aamateur-artist]

@@MoonchildDontCry Wait-

[@trashbasket11]

​@@MoonchildDontCrythat's depressing

[@JordySan]

lying is kinda fun (sometimes)

[@zookerszoinks]

Real

[@briebrockk]

Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off

[@TainaElisabeth]

“I spent every Sunday of my childhood learning about the Bible but there’s no way I can know this Bible verse” is an absolutely fascinating thought process

[@NovelsNotice]

As someone with OCD, who doesn't know a single other person with it in real life, your videos have been so comforting.

[@chatnoir9038]

There are so many of us! There are probably so many people walking past you every day who struggle with the same thing. You are not alone with this! ❤️

[@rachann8672]

I think there are more of us than you would expect! Most people just aren't as open about it :)

[@briclare]

fr. she’s literally how i pretty much confirmed i had ocd and went to have a diagnosis. i was on the edge abt it bc of stereotypes. my mom told me i didn’t have it because i wasn’t clean or organized (🙄). but nicole’s ocd vid i was like “wait, me too?” the whole fkin time

[@leileiluslay]

Literally

[@anaibarra1487]

You are the reason I stopped thinking I was just a crazy/bad person because of my intrusive thoughts. Getting diagnosed with OCD was so reassuring and changed my life.

[@GabriellaBianca8]

Meanwhile I’m working on a video explaining how spirituality helped me manage my BPD symptoms significantly. Love hearing this perspective, thank you so much for sharing your story and also holding space for those who are spiritual/religious

[@rx500android]

I’m not super spiritual as in actually believe in spirituality, but I did notice that practicing spiritual things such as astrology, tarot, crystals and moon cleansing rituals actually really helped my BPD and OCD. It gave me a sense of control and like there’s a bigger image and bigger plan of the universe that I cannot see, and everything will be ok. It’s really interesting actually

[@emilygoneferal]

@@rx500android love this, i don't have ocd but i'm a very anxious person and overthink and worry about everything and tarot is one of the few things that makes me feel genuinely calm

[@jamsquan9415]

@@rx500androidthis is exactly how i feel. the world feels horrible and chaotic and spirituality helps soothe it and bring at least the illusion of a sense of order/karmic justice.

[@bean2046]

@@rx500android same! Spirituality can be very beneficial or very harmful, depending on where you are in your journey, I think. What more or less saved me from the guilt spiral was actually (and ironically) "The Secret", when it had a chokehold on the girl boss scene. Wild times. That book just opens up with "if someone has cancer, they thought too many negative thoughts" and excuse me, that's fucked up. I have since learned that manifestation is just frequency illusion (i.e. once your brain is aware of something, it will notice more of it) and if you wouldn't want another person to feel bad about something, you shouldn't either. Same with crystals and stuff. Brain knows that amethyst is associated with calming, whether you believe if there's energy emerging from the stone or not. Tarot is actually super helpful with my adhd because I technically know what I have to do, but it's a lot of work to prioritze and organise my thoughts. Unless a little card makes my brain jump to a top priority in 0.1 seconds. You also put effort and intention into your life, which leads to more confidence and feeling of self worth. As long as you don't use it to shame humans, that includes yourself. I'd like to apologise for this little rant, it's very fascinitating, I'm passionate about it and I've stopped myself from typing a whole book here. I'd also like to thank everyone who ever tried to shame me for my spirituality with the "but you're intelligent and logical" because I am indeed both and also a petty smart-ass, who enjoys the confused look on these people's faces when they have to admit that there's nothing stupid, passive or delusional about spirituality.

[@Shirumoon]

@@rx500android For me it made me worse. Your experience is super valid but I just want people to be cautious before getting into spirituality (or even religion for that matter) because it may not end up being a good time. Especially new age stuff like law of attraction is awful if you struggle with intrusive thoughts and I wish I never would have gotten into it.

[@simply_ari_j]

Your first big video on your OCD actually sparked me to talking to my therapist about my symptoms and I am now working toward possibly getting a diagnosis for OCD

[@izziejewel]

Same! It was what ultimately led me to being diagnosed. Endlessly grateful 4 u Nicole

[@seagurll]

@@izziejewel So proud of you both! I know I'm a stranger but going off firsthand experience and with loved ones who struggle in similar ways, it's a fucking FEAT to challenge those thoughts and I'm cheering you on all the way 💖

[@beanditch]

I used to struggle with a very similar manifestation of my ocd except instead of thinking I was psychic I was TERRIFIED life was a simulation and everything was tailor made for me and/or someone was trying to get my attention from the “other side” to “wake me up” or whatever. Thankfully it’s been mostly under control for a few years now but every once in a while I’ll start to notice a string of coincidences that make me actively have to fight it from starting up again

[@amandah3619]

That’s not OCD. That’s mania or schizophrenia.

[@yaqiza]

@@amandah3619 this is for you 23:05

[@Backdirnkuchendraus]

@@nobodysgarden9375 not to be rude but you obviously don’t know that much about either disorder. If the commenter was schizotypal it wouldn’t have resolved itself. The main difference between OCD delusions and delusions in psychosis is being aware, that your fears are delusional but still not being able to control them

[@Backdirnkuchendraus]

@@amandah3619it’s really dangerous to say something like this to a person with OCD

[@vb8801]

I guess some people missed the part of the video where she asks viewers not to diagnose strangers on the internet as you're not qualified to do so and it's not appropriate.

[@kateheredia910]

I don’t have OCD but I have a mental illness called Schizoaffective disorder and I too have come to realize signs of when I wasn’t well…. It embarrasses me from time to time and I don’t like to talk about it. But I’m so glad you made this kind of video it makes me feel less lonely.

[@kellyanneramirez]

Twins!! I’m Schizoaffective too. Never met another person with it. It started with a Schizophrenia diagnosis but then I changed psychiatrists and they narrowed it further.

[@ashmac87]

Oh, that's a rough one! I used to work with people diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and their struggles were intense. I have really bad depression and anxiety, and probably a personality disorder. It's lonely. Sending love.

[@bohemianscandal]

the comment you made about feeling that you would have felt guilt over 9/11 if you had been older is actually fucking insane because I was only 7 but I vividly remember and even my mom will still tell the story of how I “predicted” it with a dream I had… couldn’t predict my own OCD diagnosis over 20 years later though COULD I LMAO

[@nyjiar]

I have dermatillomania (a skin picking condition that falls under ocd for those who don’t know) and have had issues with picking so bad at my scalp that I would have cuts, scabs, and bruises all over I also cause a lot of hairloss on and off for the pass 10 years of my life and hearing people have more open conversations about ocd makes me feel less embarrassed about it so thank you so much for that

[@maxwellversed]

Thank you for sharing!! I have dermatillomania and it’s weird how many people think it’s “self harm”. So many different kinds of OCD and they’re all just as valid!

[@savannahbxoxo]

I have trichotillomania, so I totally relate!

[@hellohell7773]

@@savannahbxoxoSame! I hate having scars on my arms, and I used to pick at my eyelashes but I finally stopped long enough to grow them back

[@gracequalls9770]

I also battle dermatillomania, something I've found is to redirect at the seems of my pants haha

[@phoebe256]

The dialogue you are having about OCD could very well save lives. So many of us feel like there's something deeply wrong with us and just by talking about it so openly, you've made it less scary. People can say you're just being "quirky" all they want but there are so many people who are grateful for what you're doing. Happy OCD Awareness Week

[@rosariocasella5153]

I’m not diagnosed with OCD, but I do struggle with intrusive thoughts. I really appreciate your videos talking about your diagnosis bc it brings so much light on it and I feel much more educated now.

[@junoestro]

thank you for humanizing ocd. its genuinely so humiliating to live with it, but hearing others talk about it is really helpful

[@baphometsolutely]

I hate the intrusive thoughts. They can be truly debilitating, and make myself sick. Finding out I wasn't super gross and psychotic helped IMMENSELY! My therapist told me that with OCD and intrusive thoughts, your first thought isn't yours, but the thought that immediately follows it are yours. Ex: we had a trash compactor at my old job. Every time I would throw cardboard in it, I'd think "I wanna throw a baby in there" then immediately be like "ew wtf no wtf is wrong with you???" Knowing that the first thought isn't mine helps me immensely with the guilt of my thoughts, or the perverse nature in my mind that I ABHORE.

[@junoestro]

@@baphometsolutely Yeah exactly. in no world would you ever do something like that, but you'll still make yourself feel horrible being fed the thought. It's so hard to actually believe that the thoughts arent actually based in reality and stuff. You deserve the best though. I'm really sorry that you experience all that

[@alinka9884]

i just started the video and i already have to say that your LIPS look ABSOLUTELY IMMACULATE NICOOSHA

[@NicoleRafiee]

thank you 🥹

[@sarah30932]

I have OCD, and am a Social Worker who used to work as a therapist. I know this video is even more helpful to other people than you even realize. It is a beautiful reflection of how you’ve grown on your journey. Thank you so much for posting this ❤❤❤

[@kjgklfjkjgklfj4543]

i always thought it was weird how only in the lowest points of my life i felt i was psychic or had some sort of psychic connection, i know for a fact i turned to tarot as a way to comfort myself, talking with my own subconscious through the cards. it was truly just a coping mechanism for me and having gotten through that has made me grow into someone who can be confident in the face of uncertainty

[@Lackaday.]

I don't know if I have OCD or not, but I have some OCD-like obsessive/intrusive thoughts, and you talking about your OCD makes me feel better about the stuff my brain does. And goddddd the guilt over feeling responsible for stuff you don have actual control over- my dad used to complain about gas prices while child-me was in the car with him, and one time he started complaining and I felt so guilty about it I criedddd

[@justaweelasss]

I do not have OCD, but I appreciate you talking about this so much. An ex partner of mine went through a really difficult time when figuring out they had it. I witnessed a lot of the breakdowns she had over intrusive thoughts and genuinely believing she would become the horrible person she feared. It was the most heartbreaking thing to witness. Later on she got diagnosed with OCD but before that we had no idea what it was. No one deserves to feel like something is wrong with them and that there is no way of getting better. You talking about it in such detail is the best thing that can happen to someone maybe struggling but not knowing what it is because media usually has such a poor portrayal of it.

[@mckennamorgan8025]

I got diagnosed 5 or 6 years ago at age 23/24. Probably one of the best things that happened to me (diagnosis, not OCD). Love that you're making content like this, because then others won't have to wait so long to get diagnosed. They'll understand what it actually is. I went misdiagnosed for nearly two decades because of the misinformation out there. You're doing good, kid. Thank you. ❤

[@solarsatori]

I appreciate this so much! My OCD is mostly contamination based and weirdly the pandemic was the easiest and happiest time of my life because I finally had an "excuse" for all my sanitation rituals and to avoid going to other people's homes. Now that everyone has moved past all the precautions my OCD is popping off again. I literally forget that other people don't "see" germs on things the way I do until someone notices me avoiding touching surfaces in public.

[@Kinda_gayngl]

When I was Christian, I was convinced I could hear ghosts & thot that spirits communicated with me. Granted I was in middle school but it’s still embarrassing & a bit concerning😅

[@xorayne_]

you literally made me get diagnosed. i was writing it off as anxiety but then realized the thoughts were so beyond and intense. i brought it up with my therapist and got the diagnosis after a long process

[@ambkay]

i’ve always appreciated your transparency and actively talking about how your mental illness changes your way of thinking takes a lot of self reflection so it’s impressive how you can acknowledge and actively change those ways. all your effort is really visible in the content you put out and i find that really inspiring to get better.

[@savhardt]

unironically at the beginning of this year I thought I was never going to feel better and that my experiences with ocd were something totally unique and unbeatable. seeing your channel and videos that were so open about ocd and the ways your illness can trick you out of joy changed the course of my mental health journey for the better. thanks for being willing to share your experience as I know I'm not the only one who feels this way

[@sydneyanastasia3053]

the way u started talking about skin picking while i was picking my skin 😭😭😭 thanks ig it made me stop also i think you were part of the reason i pushed so hard to get diagnosed. bc i watched a video of yours a while ago where you talked about skin picking and intrusive thoughts and i remember commenting being like “i don’t have ocd but this was so relatable thanks” and then months later i get diagnosed with ocd and adhd 😭😭 girlie was so dumb back then fr i thought i was borderline for some reason. like i could just not get that out of my head. but i feel so so so much better actually knowing what’s wrong and i no longer feel like a crazy person. the bus is my biggest trigger so with it being summer my ocd has been so much better that sometimes i even forget about it. but i know it will all get worse once school starts again. and vacationing will be hard too with all those new variables. i feel so much better even just knowing what it is and that i can watch videos like these. i even have a friend with ocd and we talk about it all the time ! life has just been so much better with my diagnosis so thank you for being even just a small reason that i tried to get a diagnosis

[@user-eo2sx6en6l]

This video was very helpful for me. I am an ex-Christian, but a horrific break up and heavy depression/chronic substance use brought me to a place where I decided to get into witchcraft. My religious background/anxiety/likely spectrum disorder/derealization actually created a perfect breeding ground for paranoia. Not long into sobriety I've come back to my own reality in acknowledging that I have no need for any religion in order to cope with every day life. I believe in the day to day existence and part I play in the world, not a story I tell myself that's moldable depending on my state of mind. I am thankful for peace and stability where I can find it.

[@alexisjost6113]

I have ocd and religious trauma, and I think it’s really interesting that a lot of my trauma around religion comes from just having OCD. I also struggled with feeling psychic or spirituality gifted and feeling guilty about not doing anything with my “abilities.” When I look back, it was all just anxieties I held, the church and confirmation bias.

[@debypoole7079]

The “I'm not usually anxious” and you busting in like “YES YOU ARE” gave me life.

[@mollysutton1300]

Fellow OCD girly here, thank you for being so honest about your mental health and for just talking about it!

[@aurelia9909]

I was just diagnosed with OCD a few weeks ago - thank you Nicole for speaking out about this! I remember I was going through a really hard time when you were vlogging about your struggles, and it helped me a lot at the time. ❤

[@pharaohphoebe]

ahhhhh thank you for this i was diagnosed early! at 7! and then my parents got me treated for 6 months and NEVER AGAIN DID ANYTHING ABOUT IT and it went wildly unchecked! i got rediagnosed at 18 and took lexapro for a year and ~hated it~ and took myself off it also also doubling it by myself (🤪) i’m 27!!! thank you for this HUGE reminder that i’m -clinically delusional- like for real i needed this

[@CaleighGulsby]

that jacket is BEAUTIFUL!!!

[@ohreally1997]

family family family (ifykyk)

[@chloet2445]

I really appreciate this video

[@isabelleb-l2699]

You have grown so beautifully on KZbin, I have been watching you for about 4 years now and I still love to watch you evolve in your opinion and world views. Thank you for your contribution to the internet♥️

[@YourSilentPrincess]

3:30 you talking about your experience with OCD has really helped me personally seeing someone who struggles with something i do. especially with how bad the representation is around OCD. Love you ❤

[@333ma3]

thank you so much for making this video. It’s so beautiful to hear you critique your younger self, but do so with so much love. it’s so appreciated that you’re open about your mental illness, you’re helping so many people. ❤️❤️❤️

[@Rachh__]

I absolutely loved this video! It takes a ton of courage to share such private parts of our lives with strangers, but your videos have honestly opened my eyes so much! Destigmatizing OCD and other mental health issues is so important

[@marianarvaez6699]

Nicole you are literally GLOWINGGG

[@katemarshall2930]

Nicole, I can't thank you enough for the content you create. I grew up with extreme anxiety and was reliant on superstitions, and throughout taking a few psych classes in high school and watching your videos regarding OCD, I realized my anxiety was something bigger. Hearing you talk about the pandemic really resonated with me because, a few months before the pandemic, I remember telling people that "I just wish the world would slow down, things are moving way too fast" - and then boom - pandemic. I felt personally responsible for something that I now realize I had no control over. Obviously there were other factors, too, but that one really hit home for me. After your first video on OCD, I decided I probably needed to look into the possibility of me having it, since I recognized parts of me in what you were saying, and realized what I had was more than anxiety. I got diagnosed a few months ago and since then I've finally felt validated in the ways that I feel. Thank you for helping me make a difference in my life and (from the looks of the other comments here) other lives, too.

[@alexisw8662]

i’m genuinely really glad you made this video. i’ve had pretty bad anxiety my whole life and i realized recently i’ve been falling into some of those thinking patterns of feeling like i’m the reason certain things happen. i noticed i was doing this and didn’t really think anything of it, since a lot of people i know irl and online are pretty into like spirituality and manifesting, i just thought i was doing the same thing. but this really helped solidify that its becoming a little unhealthy and i should work on more healthy thought patterns. i’m so glad you’re OCD treatments have been helping you, and that you’ve made so much progress :-)

[@quinnrector8497]

Nicole thank you for your honesty and vulnerability, I am incredibly grateful that you decided to post this

[@green_bobcat]

The hairstyle the makeup the colours omg Nikki you're GLOWING ✨

[@squeakingof298]

I’m diagnosed with OCD and it’s really reassuring and relieving to see someone I really enjoy watching talking about it. Thank you for the content you make and sharing your experience, I’m really grateful

[@neengreen6122]

The part where you were talking about manifestation and negative thoughts really hit the nail on the head. Being told "don't think bad thoughts" is one of the worst things to hear. Your videos on OCD have helped me in so many ways and I appreciate you for being open about it. Signed, a girl who also believed she was psychic.

[@kelirichey-me3pf]

Thank you for being so open about your struggles. A brave lady!

[@stinkusbinkus8758]

It sounds like you've come really far in your journey with OCD! The path to overcoming mental illnesses is often a long one. I think it's really awesome that you're so open about your own struggles - I've dealt with depression and anxiety, but your candid accounts of what you've been through really opened my eyes to just how awful OCD really is to deal with. Thank you!

[@graveyardg0th]

It's always a good day when Nikki Nasty posts 💅🏻

[@Plutorevolveinpeace]

I’ve recently been diagnosed with OCD and it’s been so severe that I’m on a leave from work right now. Your videos have helped me not only feel heard but feel like I’m not alone and that there’s a community that does understand me. Thank you ❤

[@torialynn7585]

OMG the shadow work you do in like every video

[@beepysleepy]

I discovered your OCD-related videos right around when I was getting diagnosed, and it was (and still is!) so comforting to hear someone talk about their experiences in such a down to earth way. Thank you for the reminder that having intrusive thoughts and immense guilt doesn’t make me a crazy/evil person!!!

[@Liv_shoe]

This video came up on my homepage and i read it as “ex-psychic exposes psychics” and this was NOT what i expected but I still found it enlightening. Brain things are so crazy, and you don’t know what is “normal” or not because you’ve only ever had yours! Thank-you for sharing.

[@anthonydominguez2888]

I appreciate you speaking about all of this. I also had a period in 2020 where I clung onto manifestation as a way to cope with the pandemic and other variables happening in my life. I look back in retrospect with how damaging and obsessive I got with it that I really didn’t think others shared that same experience. Ive gotten a lot better with regulating myself but, I still get remnants with intrusive thoughts thinking that I will cause something by thinking of it in terms of “manifestation”. It took practice to handle it like as I do now. Thank you for sharing 💛💛

[@sarahghorbani]

you are actually the person that inspired me to go to a therapist and get a diagnosis and i have been diagnosed since last year. it has made me feel way less bad about all my thoughts and compulsive actions. you're my savior for this. hope you're healthy and happy xx

[@chaostheorii]

thank you so much for this video!! i have ocd too and it’s so nice to hear someone speak so honestly about it - it’s truly the worst. i really appreciate everything you do and you’re one of my favorite youtubers!!❤️

[@merrilyandjeanette]

You helped me get my OCD diagnosis. It had never crossed my mind before, I’m so thankful you have spoken about OCD in a light that popular media doesn’t.

[@Dev-xe7fz]

This video definitely helped me realize that like me thinking i was psychic and could read the future was just my OCD and I'm not crazy. Also I love your videos they're so awesome and your sense of humor and your hair looks amazing. Thank you for being an awesome, inspirational person and thank you for sharing your story and helping others! You really inspire me to just be honest with my friends, family and therapist about what I'm going through.

[@Sharletwitch]

Nicole thank you so much for sharing this! I never throw away my old journals because I like to look at how much I’ve grown. I think it’s great that you made this video to show us the practice of evaluating ourselves and self-reflection. You didn’t have to make this public, so thanks again for being helpful and using your platform in this way 💜

[@dobrusia.starowicz]

im so proud of the journey you went through! youre a rockstar

[@reeseisinpain1218]

Also,, I just want to say that you were the first "regular" person online that was near my age I ever saw with IBS and Fibro,, later on OCD,, and it was so important to me as a 17 year old who had always seen my illnesses as a punishment out with older people. Also I totally relate to thinking I manifested something horrible happening and it was all my fault omg. You sharing your experiences is so helpful i swear. thanks

[@aceisadumbass]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS!!! I have seen SO many people talking about OCD and how its this some "silly, cute, quirky lil thing" but it actually can ruin peoples lives. Personally, I don't have OCD but I'm in the writing/fanfic community and see so many characters where OCD is misrepresented. I try my best to do my research so whenever I'm writing about a character with OCD they can actually be represented right, and people will stop being "Oh my gAWHSH I like to orGAnIzE all my pEnCiLs" like girlipop stfu no its not, there's so much more. But also thank you for helping ppl out by just talking about your experience with COD and thus helping other people realize that they might have OCD. I hope that y'all are getting the help you need, and hopefully doing better

[@justkidsmusic]

this is such an amazing and insightful video. couldn't relate more and thanks for sharing your narrative on it because people often don't realise what OCD actually is/how it appears in your daily life

[@mayapapaya7006]

Your first video about it came out right after I was first diagnosed and I’ve found a lot of comfort in hearing you talk about your own journey. It’s made me feel way less alone. Thanks for sharing your perspectives and experiences with the world Nicole ❤️

[@icu3869]

Confirmation bias: once again my own mind patting itself on the back for being right. Again. When it’s not. Sheesh.

[@DaniiiiPhantom]

I genuinely thought I might have OCD or even ADHD because I related to certain parts. Well, when my therapist talked about having generalized anxiety disorder I learned the symptoms can overlap a lot! It's nice seeing people talk so openly about the weird shit their brain latches onto and not needing to feel shame!

[@hannahborel6135]

This video could be so helpful for people!!! I dont personally have ocd but several of my friemds do and these thought patterns are so often not realized and using your platform to possibly inform people that they arent alone is so valuable so thank you 💕

[@alexiaharrington2437]

So proud of you for making this video! I think everything you said is spot on, you’re helping SO many people by speaking on your past rather than just covering it up and acting like it never happened. ❤love you girly

[@jessicamattes4208]

I appreciate this video so much. Though I dont have OCD, I relate to a lot of the emotions you have around your disorder as a person diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. Especially when people say, or I tell myself, that my entire personality revolves around my ADHD, and coming to terms with the fact that so many of the things that I thought were just Quirky Personality Traits™️ were actually results of my undiagnosed ADHD. I appreciate someone who is willing to talk so openly and honestly about how your (at the time) undiagnosed disorder effected you during other time periods of your life, and how you have grown and changed as a person since then to come to terms with the way your disorder impacts you now even as you continue to work on yourself. I appreciate you so much as a person and content creator, and I really look up to you as a person. So just, thank you

[@moshroomba]

hey nicoleeeee, I absolutely love your videos and appreciate how much effort and care you put into your topics. you are so funny and so gorgeous ❤

[@anadrellik]

i just want to say thank you for showing your growth over the years. especially over the last year. you have helped me push myself to seek counseling and a diagnosis (seeing multiple specialists is slay). and just showing your videos to my friends has opened up the conversation about their own struggles, and i feel like we just understand each other way more. so thanks for the videos (serious and goofy)

[@leilaniortiz4574]

Thank you so much for spreading awareness abt ocd, we have a lot of the same ocd tendencies and it makes me feel so much better and less alone! I don’t have much support from anyone other than my two friends but you educating others abt it gives me hope. Your videos are so important🫂🩷

[@oliviadement6116]

I also for the longest time thought I had some sort of spiritual superpower about telling the future! Of course Ive been diagnosed since I was seventeen. But even now i still have trouble discerning what is deep rooted anxiety because if all those times before I have predicted the future, then of course this worry of mine will happen to. Most recently I have lost a whole month due to believing I have skin cancer. I also believe i will lose my job for some reason but the truth is if i worry about every little outcome-of course one will come true. Not psychic, just a worry wart with OCD! Really trying to focus on what is actually happening and not what will happen. Because I dont know what will happen!! Thanks for posting this!! I never hear people talk about their ocd so in depth and when people try relate its about how theyre “so tidy and a neat freak” Thank you!!!

[@rachamanda13]

honestly a little scared to watch this one bc i have been doing the whole "is it my intuition or am i just imagining every possible thing that could go wrong and if something does end up going wrong, I KNEW IT!!!!" dance for about a year now

[@chelliechipcookie]

This is a really important video. Thank you for making it.

[@megandohm6843]

Just got diagnosed over the summer, and hearing you joke about it has actually helped a lot! Therapy has really been a game-changer...I've made more progress in the last couple of months than the last decade of trying to figure it out by myself. It's a long haul of un-learning an entire belief system, and so much of that work is internal (turns out not all OCD manifests like in the TV show Monk?), but I'm so thankful that I can start moving forward now I've got a name for it. Glad you're talking about OCD so openly, it was so so helpful in my early diagnosis days!

[@propz_xx]

At first, I gas light into myself into thinking that I didn't have OCD. when you came out about it, it made me research a bit more. Long story short my mom told me that I was diagnosed with it years ago, and I just completely forgot. But I'm so happy that you're talking about it. Makes me feel less crazy

[@loser2idol]

I had to cut out religion/spirituality for my ocd as well. And it got so much better when I did. It got to a point where I was so afraid of my own thoughts because I “”knew”” I was going to get into a car accident and I actually did. It fucked me up for awhile lol

[@emilybaio4118]

This video is such a comfort for me. OCD is so hard to understand and verbalize do thank you ❤

[@unclewalnut8213]

I'm wanting to cry out of pure enlightenment and joy of your beautiful way of speaking lightly on the tremendous effects ocd has on us folks. you are wonderful Nicole thank you 5ever

[@GuardianSpirits13]

I don't know you but I am SO proud of you and it was very refreshing to see such a healthy and self-aware perspective on this. I've always believed in having grace with my younger self and knowing that even if I wouldn't believe something now that I did then, that the comfort that my beliefs may have given me was still real and shouldn't be dismissed

[@emmabrainard7670]

I strongly relate as someone with OCD who has black and white thinking that can make religion difficult to grasp. Through lots of therapy and consideration I now believe that God forgives me every day and I don’t have to fixate on being “good” or “bad”. I just focus on living & knowing I am loved & forgiven just as I am.

[@CloneCaptainRex7567]

I grew up Catholic in Mexico and we were always taught that God and Jesus are beings of love and understanding and while not all powerful they do the best to guide you and take care of you. I hate how people teach that God is an angry dude that will punish you for bs.

[@childofgod759]

also mexican catholic and while i dont have ocd i suffer from black and white thinking from being very mentally ill and sometimes theres this looming feeling like i am being punished or will be but i know god prolly wouldnt do that idk being religious and mentally ill you really do have to get the best out of religon like the comfort and the hope and remove the shit the church teaches you lol

[@renbae436]

thank you for that video nicole, it really put me into a different perspective about my own ''manifesting" and OCD experience

[@lanedebbie]

Great and fascinating video. I’m a longtime sub, and I have to say I remember the “manifesting” period. You almost lost me with those, but the other content was entertaining enough that I kept sticking around. So happy that you finally found out what was going on and are able to get the help that works for you. I know you prefer doing the “essay“ type videos now, but for those of us that have been around a while, it’s great to get a peek into your real world again every now and then.

[@joy-lustig]

I was diagnosed with OCD earlier this year and now everything in my life makes sense. Thank you for making this video!

[@IsabelleSayed]

I feel like I’ve commented this before lol but I have autism which shares a ton of similar traits with OCD and your videos have been so helpful when it comes to understanding my thoughts. I’m really thankful you’re talking about this kind of stuff

[@aldis.lime.lacroix]

3:42 nicole i just want to say *thank u* for being so transparent and vulnerable. i also have OCD - ive since i was a little kid and i always thought there was something really wrong with me, and i have always felt very alone in that & having someone with a significant online platform - especially someone who i enjoy watching- really makes me feel less alone and helps me feel seen. so thank u so much

[@adultpersonman4612]

This now one of my favorite videos on KZbin tbh. I appreciate your honesty so much! I do not know if I have OCD but I did at least feel very heard and understood in this video. Your honesty is so important to the online conversation of more stigmatized mental health issues

[@n.a.7040]

I don't have OCD (or i don't think so) but I do have a lot of anciety and obsessive thoughts and this video helped me put into words what I've been feeling for years. The guilt of not being able to foresee or control traumatic events in my life or family has always felt so irrational to me but this makes me feel less alone. Thanks Nicole :)

[@welikepotato]

I was diagnosed about a month ago and have really enjoyed seeing you mention your OCD now and in the past. I am so proud of you for the way you have progressed and how you talk about yourself with compassion. I think you help to de-stigmatize it and you’re also funny.

[@cam4760]

STOP EVERYTHING A NEW NIKKI NASTY VIDEO JUST DROPPED yippeeee

[@dylanholm1509]

Thank you so much for posting this. The magical thinking was exactly how my OCD used to manifest and I still have to stay away from people who talk about manifestation or are a certain flavor of spiritual. So thank you for your transparency! You’re helping a lot of people who don’t realize they have it

[@milkslice3730]

I used to think I had a really good immune system because I wouldn’t get sick as often as my family. turns out I actually have a bunch of vitamin deficiencies that makes my immune system a bit worse than most, I was just very good at washing my hands and keeping a distance from people

[@abbi7072]

I had almost the EXACT same experience. The psychic thinking, manifesting, religion, etc. It all came to a head earlier this year and I had a complete 2 month long break down and the world no longer made sense. It was terrifying. I made myself go actually insane with intrusive thoughts. I am diagnosed OCD, PTSD, bipolar, anxiety, and depression. I’m in a much better place now, medicated, and have a much healthier outlook on reality. Thank you for this video, I feel a lot less alone 🧡

[@angelarose9575]

This video is so great and insightful. It is so nice to see you watch your old self and hold back on being negatively critical of that person. I’m sure the thoughts were there, but you handled it so gracefully.

[@BlankParty]

This point of view is so refreshing and helpful. Thank you for making this video