Exactly What to Say When He Pulls Away (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)

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What are the real signs a man is losing interest?
He sends less frequent texts... check.
He’s less available for dates... check.
A feeling of “distance” in the way he speaks... check.
You feel like there’s nothing you can do. But there is a confident, powerful response you can use in this situation that makes him 5x more attracted to you.
Just watch this video to learn the essential do’s and don’ts of what to say when a guy stops making the effort.
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Produced by:
MATTHEW HUSSEY
JAMESON JORDAN
WILL YOUNGBLOOD
NATASHA ELIAS
Camera Operators:
JAMESON JORDAN
RYAN TURNER

[@lilcorsan]

"I'm feeling some confusion from you, which is totally fine, but i'm Going to take some space. because i don't want to get closer to someone who's not sure what they want." De nada!

[@MM-je8dr]

from all the women watching this at work and can't have sound on... Thank you !! lol

[@melaniebrambila9304]

Nelly Corrales thank you!!!

[@kanashihana]

the problem is when he says something like "i will tell you directly what i want, i want you". Yet i still feel he is kind of pulling away... And even if say i dont know whathe wants yet he "told me" 😕

[@mikejetski6011]

what happens if you guys have some space but then he doesn't come back :( should you have tried harder?

[@hank1221]

mike jetski girl if you give him space and you see he’s not trying, let go and move on. If he doesn’t want to be in your life don’t try and chase him!

[@theevil6252]

After going through comments ... Being single doesn't feel that bad .

[@izashley5686]

TheEvil 😂😂😂😂

[@whitecotton2101]

It's never that bad at least you can sleep deeply at night and no overthinking

[@joykirabo6978]

Hahaha

[@kwarmrakseadum9083]

Omg I feel you! Guys are tiring sometimes I feel like giving no sh*t is best. It’s like they wait to get power when they do then it puts us vulnerable and I hate that. I’d rather feel free of any anxiety of someone having power over me.

[@bomkazidlamini2801]

I'm next on being single

[@totomorte2216]

I started watching these videos so that I could get a guy, but I end end up falling for Matt

[@marvvy9641]

Hahahahahahahahaha he's so yummy 🤣🤣 Is he single lol

[@rosemaryjohnson3971]

😱😂😂😂

[@AsimKhan-pr2if]

Same! Girl, same! Now I can't stop watching him 🙄🙄

[@juliasdestiny2492]

Yep..I'm in love.

[@juliasdestiny2492]

Try 3 yrs of investment.

[@DearSybersue]

If a guy is starting to pull away let him go. When he is REALLY interested he doesn't want to go anywhere.

[@sciencenotreligion5607]

Mostly that's true. But I have had one case and I've seen it happen where a man is really attracted to a woman yet goes very slow because he has commitment problems. After he really gets to know her, he becomes committal and starts showing affection.

[@jedidjab4346]

Dear Sybersue Amen

[@jedidjab4346]

Science not religion it shouldn’t just be all about him.

[@lights473]

Battleborn - men and women are wired differently, it's not simply social norms. It's biological.

[@sunvavachi]

I needed to read this.

[@nadjakellenberger46]

„fall for him but never chase him, never.“ - what a good friend told me about falling in love

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

I'm done chasing my SP. Thank you! For your very needed comment. My Gratitude to you!👍❤

[@MsChantae]

"In life, people aren't used to being called out on their shit. They're used to getting away with murder and no one saying anything. " - Matthew Hussey

[@averagemobileplayergfs7383]

Facts

[@KG-bliss]

So so true...and it's interesting watching them try to find words to respond😂

[@pricklypear1111]

Best thing to say when he pulls away: nothing. Let him go.

[@DarcyMarieTCB]

Slee D true

[@sofysophia]

true. I don't know what Matthew is trying to achieve with this dumb line.

[@marshwiggleme]

I think by pulling away yourself without a word if a guy is pulling away/fading/ghosting is a statement in itself too.

[@angelataylor7799]

@@marshwiggleme that you'll just accept whatever?

[@justicemartinez2625]

@@sofysophia idk what you're trying to achieve with your dumb comment.

[@aammaanndyy]

Just so you know, you're appreciated.

[@ligahuga333]

AmandaKavana this is such a sweet comment

[@karishmasingh5342]

Amanda Kavana why'd I read your name as Avada Kedavra?!

[@chahatpadda9121]

amen to that!

[@its_stardust]

[@johannaaoifeelliston8545]

Thank you 🙏🏼💖💕

[@mintlily1171]

This comment worked magic for me. It opened up a dialog between us that revealed we were simply misunderstanding each other. Neither one of us wanted the distance ❤

[@soulfirecreditrepair]

This is what I am hoping for

[@vladuskable]

MintLily could you please say more about your story? How long was he distant for when you sent it?

[@Jenascorner_leapyr24]

When a man pulls away, do nothing, may wish him happiness and may he find what he wants then, move on. Be happy. Your life was precious even before he appeared to your life. If a man, wants you, they do, if they get flaky, they have some doubts, if they don't, fine. Just be happy with your own life! 😃😃😃😃

[@cha9165]

I think this is perfect

[@riccia9674]

If he dissapears..I do the same. For some reason , they always seem to pop up again?!?

[@spearmint4093]

Green House when do they pop up and how long had you dated?

[@riccia9674]

Dating time somewhere between 2 years to 3 months. They disappear, so I do my own thing and they return within a few weeks or a few months and try to get back in my life.

[@riccia9674]

Probably self worth issues; wanting you more if you have no regards for them.

[@aliensexistsandimtheprove4712]

Green House same here ! They like it when I treat them like dogs

[@lights473]

aliens exists and I'm the prove - you're disgusting

[@madisonrose1977]

This really works ladies. Watched this video a year ago, and said those exact words. He called me a week later, and we've been together ever since.

[@vladuskable]

Madison Rose thank you! Happy to hear some positive news. So he hasn’t replied right away?

[@yogyal292]

Y’all still together??

[@lilicivodiv8363]

Do not pull him back when he is pulling away, he is not into you and long term it will only hurt you.

[@NikkiDLovely]

Best advice : CALL HIM OUT ON HIS SHIT!! He's right, people aren't used to being called out on it, and when you do...BAM...real game changer. lol

[@NotUrAvrg]

Nikki D. Lovely I'm so glad I already do this. only thing is people think I'm a dick cuz I dont have a problem calling them out

[@thehapagirl92]

True. That's why my ex said he wanted to break up. When we would talk he would ignore me so naturally I said something. He didn't like to be reminded that he was ignoring me so eventually he ended things. Pretty fucking dumb thing he did, the ignoring me part.

[@btdtpro]

As someone who has no issue calling people on their shit, I have learned in life, that there are many ways to call people on their shit. The bad way can shut the person down, wreck their ego, make them feel sad and pushed way. The good way can help them realize they were in the wrong, but make them still feel wanted, while also giving them encouragement to put in the effort it takes to change that bad habit or method that they'd gotten used to using on people who would let them get away with it. The difference between calling people out in a good way, or in a bad way, can be less than five or ten key words different. It's easy to blame the other person for not being able to handle being called on their shit, but it's good to remember that we can always be getting better at dealing with other people's issues. We ourselves have issues, and we'd want someone to be loving and gentle, but also clear and direct, when dealing with our issues.

[@NikkiDLovely]

agreed.

Nikki D. Lovely btdtprowhich words do you use then ?

[@boudika100]

If a guy doesn't get back to you... he's either dead or he doesn't want to

[@dr.kavyaprakash5623]

This comment has helped me more than this viidoe I just watched and for that, thank you 🌸

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

Thank you!👍❤

[@mahletalem]

🤣🤣🤣

[@slim-essential]

😂😂

[@fimja]

Why must it be so complicated??? Why do we have to plan out what we should say or make sure we are saying the right thing for the right reaction. Why can't it be simple?! They're either into you, or they're not. No games. No challenges. Just two humans being upfront and honest.

[@d.s.v.6404]

I'm a guy and could not agree more. I recently met someone and am dealing with this now. She was fantastic and I did not care to tell her that on a follow-up. I added that I would like to see her, again. I didn't wait some time period like a day or three days or whatever we conjure up in our head to be the "right" amount of space. I embrace my vulnerability. When I start to second guess what to say, I second guess who I am and that is doing a disservice to the other person and even worse, myself. I like someone. I tell her. If she doesn't respond in kind, at least she knows where I stand, and I felt like I honored myself by acknowledging and stating my feeling.

[@BlinkinFirefly]

I keep asking myself the same thing. I see this come up a lot in relationship video comments. It seems to make perfect sense to just be upfront and honest. But then I try to remember that most people (I want to say most men) are selfish, insecure, or cowardly, and not in tune with their higher self. They allow themselves to be slaves to their hormones and to the idea that they need to "be a man". They let that blind them, and then don't seek to be truly open and honest individuals. Because they see that as being weak. Matthew is teaching women how to communicate with THOSE men. Because most of THOSE men are what exists. Logically, being open and honest and mature is the right approach. Unfortunately, if we want a romantic relationship, we're stuck having to play the game because humans don't typically choose logic over hormones and ego.

[@dianaverano7878]

@@d.s.v.6404 my thoughts exactly. The guy in that video did not communicate in 2 weeks then ended it? You don't do that to someone u like, right?

[@uuuuukkkkkkk303]

@@BlinkinFirefly wow

[@classybyher]

Because they are all wrong, the right guy is always easy sister

[@judigemini178]

No one is worth playing guessing games for. No one. Instead of focusing on how to sustain the attention of childish men, how about advice on how to spot these men before they waste your time and/or how to get straightforward men that will be upfront about wanting to be with you or not

[@pigeonlovebird]

Wichi Woo for real. These stupid dating games are for girls who don't know what they want - a real man who's going to make them clearly feel wanted

[@adamcorfman573]

I agree with you, but there's one problem. A majority of the dating advice I've seen for men is to be "mysterious, sexy, and spontaneous" and to not be upfront or direct. A lot of the advice for men says to not be upfront and direct. They say to be smooth and give hints (which is supposedly sexy) so that you will be more attractive to the woman. All in all, I see it that both the advice for women and the advice for men is basically saying to play mind games, and I think it's BS.

[@P_Belle]

Judi Gemini - for REAL! Theyre supposed to be the simpler ones

[@veggie42]

One sign is when you first talk to a man how he acts and what he isn't saying. What he says what wants. What are his goals in life? What about his family and friends. How he speaks about other people in his life. Mine have total red flags. Better off as friends nothing more.

[@serendipitousbliss6548]

I think if your able to get to know each other in a real social setting as friends first then the dating game is completely different and what you say applies. Because the persons attraction is based on something real - on who you really are. Unfortunately in modern dating where often your meeting with people you have met only once or twice before for brief dates the rules simply change. And it works both ways for the guys and the girls. Everything this guy said also applies to women who pull away from men too. With some one who you don't really know properly but have started dating ..... unfortunately 90% of your attraction early on is not really based on who the person is. Its based on superficial view of who that person is .... which is mostly based around these small interactions via text and in conversations. How you carry yourself, how you "value" yourself determines how the other person views you. Its the sad reality of dating people who you haven't already gotten to know and developed genuine interest and affection for.

[@girijasharma912]

I sent this text n got a call from the guy within minutes. But after some days he disappeared again! Some guys are just not worth the time

[@bethgaskell9016]

What text?

[@naominatural79]

@@bethgaskell9016 I’m feeling some confusion from you, which is totally fine, but I’m going to take some space because I don’t want to get closer to someone who’s not sure what they want.

[@naominatural79]

@@bethgaskell9016 He said it in the video.

[@moonstruck562]

for a relationship to work right both ppl have to be invested, if one is not the less painful excuse is "im just too busy." no one is "too busy" if they want to be in a relationship w you they will make the time. no matter WHAT you say or HOW u say it they already have made up their minds. its pointless u beat urself up.

[@luxuryqueen42]

Moon Struck I see your point. even doctors who are supposedly "busy" still make time to having extramarital affairs lol

[@moonstruck562]

Cool Chicka lol true

[@kyokusiimafabis6253]

wao

[@adamcorfman573]

100% agree. I feel like a lot of dating advice is BS. I also feel like if people complain about a spark not being there anymore or the attraction is lost throughout the dating stages they have unrealistic assumptions. Isn't eventually living with someone going to have its "boring" moments? Isn't that what a long term relationship entails? Supporting each other and loving each other for who they are?

[@EyesOfAbraxis]

Moon Struck yeah, the operative word there is both. He's just simply giving advice for what you should do on your part. If he's worth your time then he will do what he should on his part as well. There's a reason you came to this Channel and watch these videos, and it's because you want to understand things and be a better person and prospective mate and also a more effective Communicator in your romantic relationships, correct? Obviously, there are countless videos out there for men, whether they choose to watch them or not, that are more or less the same and provide Insight on how to talk to him in and what the best approaches are. I think Matthew has made it clear that none of these techniques are intended to be used in a manipulative divisive way to control someone. Because you simply can't force someone to love you. And he has said that time and time again. Impressively, what he's arguing here and in most of his videos, is not just how to manipulate some guy to do whatever the hell you want, but as a man, letting us know as women what is the most effective means of communicating with them in a way that they understand and that is most effective... But also, and obviously he certainly doesn't have to, he unceasingly emphasizes throughout his videos the incredibly vital importance of genuine self-confidence. Not just to get a guy. But for you. For your life. Because that is the key to unlocking your happiness. Forget just getting a guy. Having self-confidence is what will make your life worthwhile. And I think he's gone above and beyond to emphasize that. So I don't think it's right for you or any of the other commenters here to look at it as though he's basically that vomit-inducing creep who calls himself "Mystery" from the show "The Pickup Artist"... But for women. That douchebag is manipulative and the definition of disingenuous. That douchebag has no concern for approaching the opposite sex in a way that is respectful and could lead to a healthy relationship for both parties involved. Instead, that show is basically about teaching guys how to get laid by treating women like shit and being anything other than yourself. It doesn't teach confidence it teaches how to manipulate people. Matthew here, on the other hand, is simply trying to provide advice from a man's point of view but also goes out of his way to encourage and emphasize the importance of sincerity, compassion, understanding, confidence, self-worth, honesty and true happiness. He's simply trying to explain how best to convey certain things to men in a way that will be most effectively understood by them. Seeing as he is a male and most of his viewers are female, I think that, while no individual's opinion is foolproof or the answer to everything or without flaws, in the case of this Channel and these videos, he's providing not just tipz to manipulate and get a guy with no respect for who they are and only for what you want... He is pretty damn effectively explaining the psychological principles at work behind every relationship and behind most men's behavior and perspectives. As well as the psychological principles at work behind how many women try to communicate but find their efforts to be ineffective and they don't understand why. He is trying to help people create healthy, happy relationships were both partners are equally satisfied and the affection, attention, and overall happiness is reciprocal and the relationship is a healthy and rewarding one. For all the countless commenters who apparently look at it from the perspective that he's just telling women to say whatever to get what they want, says far more about where they are at psychologically and emotionally than it does about the Integrity or intent behind these videos. Matthew was just trying to help. And if you're watching these videos, it's because on some level you know you need help. You want to understand. No one's forcing you to watch it, and if you don't agree or think it's bad advice, find one of the countless other KZbin channels that will tell you whatever you want to hear and perhaps that's a better solution for you. But don't badmouth someone who is basically providing free and largely accurate and insightful relationship counseling and encourages women to grow their self confidence and love themselves as well as be a better partner and a better human being. Not for the sake of a guy, if that's solely what you want and have no concern for their feelings or your sense of self-respect, you should probably find another Channel. Or more accurately, get yourself to a counselor because you have some far deeper problems than simply not being able to effectively communicate with men.

[@sonniaeleo_e]

As my late mom says never give your heart 100% to a men.When they pull away we don't feel that much pain.

[@showglowshowglow488]

sonnia eleo She was absolutely right!

[@atme365]

That sounds sad

[@sophiejensen3484]

Omg if he pulls away he’s with someone else! Let him go.. he’s never going to TELL you!

[@sofysophia]

I can't believe I used to get his books and follow his advice. tbh, people do what they want to do and the guy KNOWS he's pulling away without you bringing it up. seriously, why would you even bother saying you're gonna take some space? aren't you already taking space since he has pulled away? fact is, he pulls away because he doesn't want to hear from you. and more often than not, these guys come back after they have their feelings sorted out. my guy left town for a month and for the first three weeks I barely heard from him. I just continued to live my life and meet people had had never reached out, not even once. after three weeks he reached out and I never mentioned anything about his lack of contact. and interestingly he has stepped up his effort ever since without me having to say a word. sometimes your silence speaks louder than words, so use it.

[@kaprinawhite1288]

sofysophia everything your saying here is true! At the end of the day who wants to be forced into anything?

[@victoriasrealm5886]

are you still together?

[@pariqureshi8334]

buh they only pop up again if they feel bored or want something else from there daily routine basically they need us only for sometime so they can get entertained couse if they have been realli interested in uh they hadn't left uh so saying this space thing might make him realize that she also doesn't need uh buh doing saying this to a guy you love the most is very difficult thing to do if he doesn't realli come back to uh again

[@helenGD]

sofysophia that fkn works. I was begging my bf so many times to stay and he was pulling away all the damn time. Now that I’m actually gone after a million times of break ups, he won’t stop asking for my presence. He only gets my silence and that’s the reward he got... who knows until when...

[@solfh]

I think we all know this but you are so fking strong... I wish I was like that. I really respect you... you give him the space he apparently needed and continue your life... and he knows he did bad...

[@Shelley261]

Dear God, start coaching the men to put their best foot forward instead of always passing the buck on to women.

[@cleodontina1]

Big Boi I agreed with you right up until you said 'start being a decent human being and good relationships will happen'. That's not true. Being a good person does not exempt you from the harsh realities of life. Good people can meet bad people, which planet are you living on?

[@polutanka]

Big boi That's not even what's she is saying, wow what an assumptions you make! What about not pulling away but instead freaking communicate to the girl what's going on. Thank god, there are still guys who actually do that and for the guys who "pull away": grow a pair!

[@erinvandalay4764]

Big Boi Oh yeah, that's why they do that whole "wait three days" before contacting you bullshit that has been discussed many times in videos like this. Basically it's always about cradling their fragile ego but making sure you don't give them the impression you like them... God forbid that they realize they don't have to chase you because their sissy egos inflate then and suddenly because you aren't making them "chase" you, then you're less valuable. The sad part is, most of the time this is an average looking guy doing this to a female who is often times more attractive and could easily find someone else, but instead she saw something in him before his bullshit games started.

[@Gradgirl]

Big Boi "be a decent human being"...Judgmental much? Are you one of those guys who likes to call us "psycho" bc you seem like the kind of guy who would.

[@serendipitousbliss6548]

There are more ways to communicate then simply direct verbal communication. No contact actually sends a pretty direct message. I personally in my dealings with women prefer this let down tothe unnecessary and awkward "Im just not that into you" conversation. Seriously I'm a big boy and if a girl stops showing interest .... I don't hound her down and demand that she explain to me why. I go - ok - shes evidentially not interested anymore. Thats ok. On wards and upwards. Humans are intelligent and can read between the lines. The spaces having meanings in communications too. When someone stops talking ..... you get the message.

[@Kyralovesmiley]

Wow. I'm still getting over the shock. I used this on a guy I really liked that rejected me, and it worked. He told me last night that he liked me. Thank you so much!

[@LadyLitka]

What I did in this situation was a bit harsher. What I wrote after a week of him not texting me back (the last messages were about meeting up on the weekend, which never happened) was: "I just want to say that I get that you no longer have the intentions of interactacting with me. I do, however, feel like the respectful thing to do in your situation would be to simply say it to me, instead of slowly pulling away and leaving me to figure it out on my own. We're not 15." He responded that he completely agrees and he's sorry for not doing that and he's currently not in the right mental state to continue interacting. He apologized a second time for not being transparent with me. I feel like this gave me back my power and control over the situation, it felt good to call him out on his bs, without jumping to conclusions, just simply letting him know where I really stand in this situation. I got my closure myself, without expecting it from him and playing the victim.

[@zivaa438]

That's a clever thing to say, I'm in the exact situation now, it's the 4th day she ignored me, I'm still hoping she'll write back.

[@HikaruCrystal8]

If a guy wants to spend time with you, HE WILL. You can say this response, and I agree it's a nice way to put things, but with that girl's situation in the video, it doesn't matter how busy that guy was. If he was all about her, he would've made time or at least called her frequently. Something tells me he'd rather be working than spending time with her. He probably just wanted the weekend getaways, and yeah that's really shitty, but a lot of people are shitty like that. They don't want to commit but they either don't tell you that or they lie.

[@batcactus6046]

yeah. Buh bye.

[@AltraTara]

It worked!!! He called me at 8am which he never did before, to tell me he needed to pull away. After trying to understand I told him ok and then I sent him the message. At 11pm he was at my house telling me he actually loves me but is so scared because he’s been on single mode for a long time and the feelings for me caught him off guard 🥰

[@yazialmarzooqi6017]

So a guy i dated for 3 months started pulling away then completely ghosted me. The funny thing about guys is that they get sooooo interested and so loving and caring in the beginning then all of a sudden its like you’re dead to them. Anyways, i didnt react at all. I didnt say heey where are you? I didnt call i did the exact same thing. He ghosted? I dont react. Cuz i feel that reacting to him makes him feel powerful that he is some important person that i should give a bit of energy to. Anyways i dont know if hes gonna come back, i dont know if this is “male intimacy cycle” man cave thing or he just lost interest. Anyways he lost someone who woulve been an amazing partner!

[@inaric2441]

Right

[@leoseara995]

This is how it should be. Is he ignoring you? well bye, there are several guys craving for my attention 😉

[@dottse_SE]

Is he come back now ???

[@missondo4887]

Well said

[@waynekarst7315]

I think girls are just as guilty for ghosting as well thats why I stay single it's too common for both girls/guys to ghost each other and think its funny

[@zeonmoo192]

I tried this and he said "I respect your decision and I wish you the best for the future" .... Thanks a lot

[@isaymanalot]

ËDÉÑ sorry this made laugh a lot 😂

[@AA4PJM]

I dont think its possible to change someones mind if they are pulling away, so sending any text of any kind is going to look like manipulation. If you date someone and they begin pulling away, just let them go and dont make any more contact. My Grandma used to say ' if a man wants a woman, not heaven or high water can stop him' If he stops calling, just let go, that way, you avoid creating any more idea in your head that he wanted you in the first place.

[@lunamorena390]

Yes, but like u said, Grandma, those were other times! NOW this advice is very useful! We are interacting in a way different manner! Men are distracted n not in their masculine energy. A message like this can "trigger" his attention...i think Matt's advice is very useful!! Love n Respect LM

[@rjenkins26]

It happens to me a month ago. After dating for 3 months. He told me he doesn't wanna get attached or miss me. That we should explore, & he said we can still hang out sometimes. Exactly what I said to him, "I don't wanna be with a man who doesn't know what he wants." After about a week of no contact he texted & wanted to be added on Facebook. We meet up for lunch then I didn't hear from him anymore. I'm too stubborn & old fashioned woman. Culture difference plays big part. Where i grew up in the Philippines, women have to wait for men to do the first move. And let them pursue you. Anyway, thanks for this video, Matt!

[@richricogranada9647]

Learn to date your own kind ONLY

[@hannahhardy7557]

I also left the door open but felt uneasy about it. So 2 wks later I sent him a "I am taking your decision seriously" letter. I realised it wasn't to get him back but to confirm my standards to him and me. Thank you.

[@madhumita3293]

If the man is pulling away, he’s not serious about you. Run away and disappear. 😊

[@goodekata7968]

2347086892323) Message Mr winged the great and powerful man who can help you in any problem helps me bring my ex back ......

[@MadMak0203]

I came across Matthew’s videos in the last couple of months. I realized it was time to have a relationship that meets my standards. So I sent a variation of the “taking space” text to the guy I was dating and was fine walking away. Four weeks later he reached back out and let me know he thought I was fabulous, he did some serious thinking and realizes he wants to put in the effort to build a relationship that is good for us both. 😃. Thanks, Matthew!!

[@phoenixmode6909]

You're lucky....unless he was just bored and his other options were unavailable. That's the boat o found myself in. I KNOW what his "other options" were, he's a porn addict and an alcoholic. Glad I dodged that bullet, I don't need that in my lovely simple life at my age. And following a similar experience in a previous long term marriage. I value myself too much now to put up with that crap. I was deeply in love with him 30+ years ago before I married but he'd broken up with me. Out of the blue, no explanation. I moved on, but never forgot him-- the key being , who he USED to be. Turns out, he walled up, even against his family who all loved him, became a hermit, began some sort of fantasy life and set himself up as a victim of everything, and drinks his life away. Nope, don't need that. I'm happy now as a single mom a d grandma, I know for sure where I'm needed and wanted and valued, and loved unconditionally. Those people are my tribe. If someone ever shows up who is whole and loves himself in a healthy manner and respects women and wants to be a part of my life, cool. You can be sure that man will be thoroughly vetted by me. If that person can survive my scrupulous vetting and actually be a true friend and respect me as I am, he might pass. Til then, I am Me, I love and respect Me, and I am happy with my life. 😊🌻

[@victoriav.3726]

Real men know what they want and don't have time to play games. This advice doesn't make sense. Ladies, focus on loving yourselves first, when you are happy with yourself, and know your worth, you won't take this crap. It's the guy who feels insecure about himself and what he wants, sounds like an issue for him. When you love yourself, you will attract the right guy unexpectedly, bc you realize you are happy and complete all on your own. This beautiful energy about you, will attract people to you.

[@danapoint6273]

Amen

[@marieanne1989]

Luke Goodfellow thanks for describing how my past relationship went down .there was a lot of attraction on his side towards me but we had nothin in common and he lost interest but he wanted us to stick around each other ,I guess for sex,but he was behaving hot and cold so I ended it. He showed no emotions when I told him I couldn’t see him no more

[@nofybn7794]

@Luke Goodfellow No, some guys are insecure.

[@ranip7644]

No offense but I'd rather take advice about guys from an actual guy whose advice has been known to be pretty accurate....

[@monicag.6462]

This is absolutely 💯 correct. You attract what YOU ARE

[@bullitt0713]

To be honest, I think that most guys would just say you too after she said. All good. Have a good week. His response was rare.

[@zarinakavazova4451]

I used this sentence just two days ago. And the power of it is that it gives you the control over the situation. I didn't think he'd flip and say "OMG, you are right. I'm an indecisive brat. I'm sorry" I did it because of the chance to turn a possible heartbreak into a disappointment and deal with it like a boss for a couple of days instead of closing myself. After all, we are the Matt Hussey army. We are out there to find the best men population can offer.

[@lvega5606]

Zara Ivanov I agree, Elphaba.

[@cherrisseporter8498]

What ended up happening?

[@jesusislord7919]

TD Jakes said if someone wants to walk away, let them walk... U should not beg someone to stay with u, call u, love u, prioritise u...etc Most men who keep asking for space are toxic and do it for their own conveniences... When someone asks for space, gladly give them, move on, but don't tolerate that habit...its draining... And worst part u don't know why he asked for that space, maybe he is cheating, and u don't even know if he will come back... Just don't wait

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

Thank you. God bless you. I also love T.D. Jakes. And your words are wise and they have come to me when I need them. The Lord Himself sent me your comment. It's time for me to let go of the toxic "friendship" I thought I was in. ✝️

[@celissewillis9399]

I absolutely LOVE this line! It's not obsessive it's just straight to the point & not forceful

[@jackpetersen7545]

Cellise Willis,You got a lovely smile 😊

[@carmaela2689]

Here's my take. You just be very straight forward. You don't pressure him to be anything but real. The right one will stick around. No meed to worry about "pulling him back". If he's right, he will stick. The wrong ones will pull away and stay away.

[@AnjaliSharma_15]

As I see people always say block him or stuff like that but to be honest I would never block my ex coz I want to show I m happy without him and leave his message on seen as he always did coz karma pays off❤

[@chakybieber]

I've been watching Matthew videos since 2015. But back then, I never really had a proper relationship as I didn't want to. So I never tried all the techniques he gave before because I know his tips would work. But this year, someone came into my life and brought genuine love. Thus I don't want to lose him. I've been with him about 4 months now. I saw this video once it came out, and today I realised that my boyfriend has been really busy with work for 2 weeks now. I felt less priority to him as we usually talked on the phone while he was working before. We didn't talk much anymore. I felt like I started to invest more excessively in him once he pulled away which I believed is not attractive. So I get back today to this video and sent these texts exactly the same to him. His response was like " And what? You go out seeing other people? Stop texting? And btw, news flash. I still know what I want. I want you in my life... etc" he apologised and we got back on track like before but is actually better now. Thank you Matthew. I will always be staying in touch.

[@pricklypear1111]

Telling him you're going to take space when he's already taken it (without warning) is an exercise in futility. Sending a text like this one is looking for a response. Just say nothing.

[@P_Belle]

Slee D - SILENCE.

[@Jenascorner_leapyr24]

I AGREE.

[@abundance131]

Totally agree

[@showglowshowglow488]

Avcodad Silence is golden

[@serendipitousbliss6548]

Yep agree. Its seeing it purely as a "power game" and a very weak attempt to try to make the break up your decision and "regain power" as if that is the only thing that matters in building a relationship. It actually reads to me asquite petty and weak because of that fact. A strong person is ok with someone deciding they are not into them. They don't need to try to "reclaim the power". They just move on and find someone who is interested in them which would be my simple advice. No games, no perfectly crafted text messages to win them back. Just know you value, have standards and stick to them. Simple advice.

[@dayanais0127]

Bottom line is, if he's not that into you, no matter what lines you have up your sleeve, nothing's gonna keep him around for too long. Valueing (

[@victoriav.3726]

I completely agree. Work on yourself first, love yourself and you will attract the right guy when least expected. When a guy pulls away is more about their problem and their insecure attachment. Read about attachment theory, it explains really well the dynamics of relationships

[@dayanais0127]

Victoria Vargas Right! It could also just mean you're not the one for him. And that's ok. The sooner we can let go, the sooner we'll meet the guy we are "the one" for.

[@SarenaHernandez]

Seeking Him well said

[@drrubaldeep6325]

I need Ur advice plz really really I. Help?need help

[@angelataylor7799]

@@dayanais0127 exactly, and the sooner THEY man up and have the tough conversation so BOTH can move on, the better for both.

[@crystalchurchill6268]

I love that you teach women to stand in their power...yes, you are still promoting your business but you do it in a way so that women can learn what they need, apply it to their life but then move on. I feel so many businesses nowadays want people to become "dependent" on the product...even in the self help community. I think it's fantastic you don't do that, because that shows you are genuine and passionate about what you do. Just wanted to say great job.

[@Taylor-nk5ez]

this video COULD NOT have come at a better time!! thank you!

[@CheFab1984]

Taylor Benson It is all how you play the cards in your hand !! Trust me. I played all my cards right. I never played games before. If someone hurt me or I missed them i just told them. Probably making myself too available. This time I smartened up and decided I was gonna play the game right back ! And am a week away from getting married and have baby #2 on the way. It wasn't EASY ! At all. Many times when He was pulling away when we were dating even through break ups. I always read up and made sure I didn't make the most common mistakes women make. Even when It seemed like we were done for good. I said and texted the correct things. If they take space never push to over compensate. Then you take space to. Always give the illusion you are having a good time even w/o them. It works.

[@elisedemonts8224]

C Fab so after he replies to this text. You just don’t message back and take the space and have fun regardless ?

[@angelataylor7799]

@@CheFab1984 sounds exhausting and fake.

[@rosegarcia2371]

A guy who ghosted me and broke my heart I ran into 10years later. He looked awful and had gained 50 pounds ( he is only 5'8"). That is what I call KHARMA. I hate to admit I enjoyed seeing him look so bad.

[@showglowshowglow488]

Rose Garcia LMAO!!!

[@sulivel]

lol

[@arjunmohan7313]

Are all women as evil as you? Happy at someone's downfall? Even if it's my ex I would have helped her get back on her feet.

[@gr8siddhesh]

10 years thats a long span maybe he is happy with a wife who cooks him delicious food also must can be a father to a child or 2 in short he must be settled in life and now does not care about his looks that much only ppl who are single try hard to stay fit look young

[@barbarariley3488]

Why is it when we split with someone we once loved or.have.had deep feelings for why do we wish them misery or an unhappy life. I am now 72 yrs old and when I look back.remembering the memories of the men I loved it is with.sweetness. Even if there was a hard ending. There is always something good to remember unless the guy beat.you up or was a criminal.

[@amailina440]

There is a french say that I learn when I was very young living in France. It’s this “suis moi je te fuis, fuis moi je te suis” it basically means “go after me and I’ll run away from you, run away from me and I’ll go after you”

[@beaa.7226]

I text him this and he only said " I'm sorry , I will always love you and be here for you ... " yes.. ... sure....💔

[@mimisam18]

Matthew, you're amazing. I've made all the mistakes a woman can make in dating situations when I was much younger. However, as I've gotten older and feel secure and comfortable in my own skin I've acquired the wisdom to know how to handle on my own most scenarios you're teaching. With that being said, you are providing a great service to all the hopeful romatics out there. I don't know if I would've listened or taken your advice if I was younger but I certainly would have had an aha moment years later. I am enjoying being single and meeting new ppl with whom I learn from all the time. You're darling. Thank you so much.

[@paulahollingsead572]

I don't use anything other than me. Yes, just being 100% real. I've never had an issue. No games, no lies, speak the truth and call them out on their bs if needed. I respect myself. I enjoy watching your videos. Women and men alike need to love themselves before they go looking for someone to love. Just my opinion however I feel it's a good one. 🌷

[@TheVivaldinio]

if he pulls away I'm cutting off all contact.... like bye 👋 i don't have time for little boys who don't know how to handle relationships and get overwhelmed quickly. men these days are never fully grown up. why do women have to play mind games and guess what could be in his mind to act accordingly. like wtf I'm so done... my next relationship is going to be me resting my ass down and he doing all the work. I'll act how i want ...say what i want and when i want it and let him decipher me. boom 😇

[@unforgettablequeen2239]

Karima McMurdy I totally agree with everything you just said!!!

[@ZaediusRA1000]

Maaaaybe, he just wanted to bang, or not, I may be wrong

[@TheVivaldinio]

Nouf H I'm a Libra 😇

[@imgrumpycat]

Forreal mind games are stupid

[@Nikitinale]

Karima McMurdy So you want a good guy who will do all the effort without you having to do anything? What do you bring to the table? If many men these days are boys afraid to commit, then many women have a princess complex.

[@lizzy5812]

I used this EXACT same line because I asked to meet up and he used a silly excuse. He was getting distant and when I asked if he wanted me to go away he said that things did changed but that there was no need for me to go away because he still thought about me. Then I threw in the line in this video...and walked away :). THANKS Matthew. Don't know what to do now though.

[@mariar3933]

I think the more you focus on your life the more attractive it is for all around you. Not only guys..Act genuine. Be genuine with your hobbies .Be ok to say no and if you keep your energy and focus on yourself..you won't even feel heartbreak.Loneliness by the way can be in relationships too..so deal with your inner insecurity first. Rest i think should be easy

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

Thank You!!👍❤⭐

[@betalean]

I just used this advice and was able to get a clearer idea of where my relationship was with guy I have been seeing. I feel like I can move on and find someone who is ready.. I have closure now too and it ended on good terms. Thanks Matthew

[@michellep6162]

I sent this message and not expecting a response from him but like betelean it gave me back my power and feel like I can move on. If he does respond I'm going to set clear expectations if he want to be in my life

[@KG-bliss]

I always say when you call people out on their sh*&t, you will know the truth because people aren't used to it. This was good Matthew, thank you.

[@huigao1404]

Just say nothing , treat him in the same way as he treats you, he will run back , easy

[@sofysophia]

hui gao so true! don't make him a bad guy for wanting to pull away. just embrace it and go with the flow I say

[@chempanda6388]

sofysophia pulling away when he does a mirroring thing.

[@kathleencohen5485]

Go with the flow. PEACE.

[@redfather5342]

No he won't

[@florgonzalez6362]

If I have to treat a guy a way I dont really enjoy or like being a bitch so he can value me, then fuck that guy. I feel the right one should want things to work as much as you do.

[@misslm267]

I swear that I used this text word for word and it worked like a charm. Now the guy won't stop texting etc....and now I am pulling away. It completely changed the dynamic between us. Amazing. Thank you Matt love you!! LOL..

[@d.s.v.6404]

And how is that being authentic to him and, most importantly, to yourself? It seems delivering the message from someone else is you simply making yourself a puppet reading someone else's script.

[@tibuCooks]

@@d.s.v.6404 it worked for her though...wasn't that the point??

[@Keevus03]

What was the point? You used this method to draw him in, but now you're pulling away? It seems you're on some narcissistic power trip. Your views had changed, but you still wanted to to try this on him. You didn't want him, but didn't want him to not want you first? It's that right there. All these games. And in turn, the cycle continues.

[@geekista]

yeah I gave a guy some space for over a year, you should know if he's sincere, the guy im talking about came and go, I felt like he was coming to me whenever he was bored. so I ended things pretty harshly im not gonna lie, but people should give time and space to someone who is worth it, dont forget that :)

[@karlacorona7426]

These words worked! He replied right back right away that he had some self stuff to work on, so I didn’t reply back. I let him go. Then 2 weeks later he showed up at my door. Call them out on their shit like he said!

[@herbertgronemeyer5753]

Darling, I've tried| this so many| times and it |didn't| work until I met| a powerfu|man 🙎‍♂️who| helped| me bring| back| my ex| husband| who left| me a few| months ago |and now my ex| husband| is back. I am very| grateful.| Send| him| a message| for any help| whatzpp|+ 2 3 4 9 0 7 1 2 2 8 0 9 7

[@kimberlyfoster8485]

I did this today. The response was i respect your need for space. Hurting you is the last thing i would want to do. I was sad.

[@user-lb9sc3gf6p]

I just did this. I won’t accept someone who thinks I’m a revolving door. I just won’t have it.

[@audreyshea1891]

I am the one stepping back. So tired of having to figure all this out. Sometimes being alone is healthy

[@solenlelannou5765]

Hi Matthew, I have used that text and got an instant reply from the man I really like and who didn't even read my messages for over a day. Thank you so much. :)

[@carolinecampelloarruda5022]

First of all, I’m grateful to found this channel and all the community here. I 100% agreed that we need to have our life purpose as priority. And was exactly what I was doing, focusing in my life and so on. That appeared a guy who got attracted to me and I was not into him during months, and he keeps trying to be present and also offered help in my life projects. I did accept and told him that at that point I couldn’t have a relationship because of my actual job (I’m tantra therapist) and he told me he didn’t have problem with that and he accepted that and keeps insisting to get closer from me. The last months he gave me gifts, we spent some time together, he made me promises, plans for nearby future and guess what? I fell in love. He texted me literally everyday and so on… when last week, he suddenly started to be off like 4 days straight… I got so confused. In resume I had a straight talk about what was happening and if was smth happening like “tell me now, I don’t have time to lose”. Then he told me he couldn’t continue building what have, cause he had other priorities etc. Still processing this suddenly breakup that not just made confused as hell as made me feel stupid to let him in my life when I had other priorities. I think the lesson learned from this situation is whenever you are sure about what u want in life don’t let someone get closer fast, analyse their true intentions, otherwise they will just steal ur energy and abandoned you. That’s why, you are the most important person in your life, to someone be part of it, they have to deserve!! Keep ur standard high!! Love u all, self love in first place, A L W A Y S

[@user-ee5om8wy7u]

The coolest advise ever! As for me, I don't like pulling anyone. Either someone comes to me by their own wish, or I'm not interested. And I'm never interested in people who are not interested in me. But when they are interested in me at first, then later they start acting like they are not as a interested any more, it is indeed confusing. So, saying "I need some space..." IS THE BEST thing to say !!!! Anything other than that will make you look desperate and clingy and over-available. If someone is not very clear or available to you as you'd like - DON'T CHASE AFTER THEM! Instead, take some space and BE WILLING to let go! That's truly powerful. That's also beautiful. A person who is always willing to let go is forever more beautiful than a person who is always willing to chase after someone.

[@eduardobarbosa8026]

Even though I am a guy, this is perfect advice for me: I always get "ghosted" by women, they always say that they're confused and don't know what they feel exactly or that they need time to do this and that...

[@Jesus_Girl1124]

I absolutely adore Matt. He has helped me thru some difficult times for about 6 years now. He's absolutely brilliant and like fine wine, getting better with age. Cheers Matt 🥂

[@emeralddaughters]

I love this format of including women and discussing their particular experience. The ladies were lovely and just awesome for getting personal. Thank you.

[@pigeonlovebird]

Jenie's MindEscape really I thought I was kind of sad how they told that one girl she said the wrong thing, I think what she said was honest and straightforward and if the guy likes he he would have apologized and made time for her

[@NABrima]

Oh MAN .. After 7 days of radio silent .. even tho we were fine and he had the ability to reach out to me .. Gathered a lot of strength and messages him those words. His reply was “Ok” !! I was worth just an “Ok” ... Thank you Mathew Hussey, I feel relieved and free .. honestly, THANK YOU

[@gillpendleton1197]

I got the "OK" text too with a smiley face. I asked what he meant and he said that it was shock!?

[@1129buttons]

What I got from this video is that either I can't send texts without consulting a Matthew Hussey video first or I may fuck it up. And I have to really analyze what I'm going to say to a guy because guys take everything literally. Honestly what you said and what that girl said sounded so similar yet her way messed everything up. Confusing and frustrating. But I love your videos still.

[@dayanais0127]

Stephanie Johnson I think the major difference was Matthew's text had more of a, "I'm into you. But I know what I want. Let me know when you do." versus, "I'm into you. *Poke* *Pout...* I'm up for grabs whenever you want me back." The first text would make a guy either go, hmmm... I gotta do something if I want to keep her around, or, eh... I'm done. If it's the latter, good riddance! Remember, we don't settle for MPIs. 😉

[@larissa6760]

Stephanie Johnson me too I feel like I should watch Matthew's vids otherwise I will fuck everything up lol. So complicated I have better things to do. The thing about what Matt said and what the girl said looked similar but in the girls case she sounded "desperate". Showing to a guy that you're always there when he is free will get him bored or he may take you for granted. If you show him that you are appreciating your life with or without him he will want to know you better and perhaps have a place in your life. :)

[@1129buttons]

True.

[@kristenk708]

Can anyone tell me what was the difference between Sarah and Matthews' texts? I feel they are the same :S Maybe the only part that was bad in Sarrah one was 'let me know when you want to hang out' so it sounds more like plain hanging out.. and Matts one was more like 'let me know when you know exactly what you want' so if the guy comes back its not just casually hanging out but really wanting her. Was that it? Someone?

[@Princessmayamarie]

Hey Hristina, The difference between Matt and Sarrah's text is very small.Basically Matt's version makes the girl sound like she is rejecting the guy. Making subtle digs, like you don't seem to know what you want and I don't have time for that...it's a bit spicier. Where as Sarrah''s is so sweet and you can hear how much she likes the guy and how she will sit around waiting for him forever. Honestly, i don't think Matt's version will guarantee any success but, I do agree that most guys I know find it hot when girls are kinda bitchy verses sweet.

[@sunvavachi]

I literally wrote this: At this point in time I think its best I step out of the equation for now. No matter what struggle we face, we should know whether we want someone in our life and to work on it through the ups and downs, no matter what circumstance. I am not interested in someone being unsure of the role I play in their life. I am not interested in being in a penpal friendship/relationship with you. I hope maybe in time we reconnect and I hope I will still be there. I hope you achieve all your goals that your working towards in life. I hope you get some clarity into the meaning of things in your life and space to work on it.

[@litabril]

Sunethra K And what happened? How he react? It is pretty direct :)

[@youniqca1489]

I love that frankness and attitude utterly! What a brave move

[@sunvavachi]

Estelí Celeste Vela Cáceres he didn't react. Infact three months later I reached out to him. He was more than thankful. He is a sweet person at heart and probably did not know how to respond. He didn't feel like he can provide for me. I don't know so we spoke, and he has had a lot of unfortunate events. We speak here and there like once so far. But I am keeping my distance and just focusing on myself. I had tried dating this guy keeping it casual but I didn't like it. Felt like I'm giving my body to someone who doesn't want me in their future.

[@robertkaysr]

I am not interested in someone unsure of the role i play in their life. That Sunethra K, is so well phrased, I take that, thank u.

[@serendipitousbliss6548]

Too long - keep it short, sweet and to the point.

[@PNWelope]

Ok Matthew, you have seriously changed my life and the way I date, thank you! A little bit of a back story, I began seeing this guy about a month and a half ago, and he has always been so hot and cold when it came to the relationship. I got the point where I was just caught in a cycle of not knowing what he wanted, did he even like me- that was what I was always asking myself. After him not replying to my message after a day and a half I finally got fed up with the behavior and after watching this video I wrote exactly what Matt said. I was not thinking he would respond but he did and I am so thankful that I had the courage to stop the cycle and that responded as maturely as he did. Hopefully this will help someone that is in the same shoes as me. Me: I'm feeling some confusion from you, which is totally fine, but I'm going to take some space. Because I don't want to get closer to someone who's not sure what they want in a relationship, and at this point, I don't feel like you're really into the relationship that we have Guy: To be honest you're right. I wanted to talk to you about that at some point. It's something I'm dealing with. You're right I have no idea if I want something more right now because I feel like I have a million other things going on. My priorities are possibly not in line with yours Ladies, break the cycle and be with the guy that treats you with respect and wants to be with you. You can do it :) Thank you Matthew and Jameson!

[@cherrisseporter8498]

Hey, is this the same guy in your photo? Did it work?

[@andreaclatworthy2297]

Aw I appreciate both of your honesty, but I think that’s why I’m afraid to send this message, because I’m afraid to confirm that there’s no hope left 😔

[@Sarah.K_]

Kayla Means I am in the same situation but no feedback after I sent the exact same msg ! I guess the no answer is an answer :) Honestly I feel releaved and for now : NO CONTACT from me ^^

[@FirstNameLastName-oe9hi]

Sarah Kaderi yeah!! Just forgot about him and you already made yourself clear with him and yeah he just doesn’t care enough to respond back to you so just forgot about him and move on. Here is my situation. I have been talking to this guy for 1 months and one week. We were heading to relationship but he friendzoned me cuz I was acting like a crazy gf. In my opinion, he was not giving me time and was always busy. Right now, we both has feelings for each other. I want him and he doesn’t want me at all. We haven’t even met at all. We do click on texting. Today I messaged him this, “ I’m feeling hurt regarding our situation so I’m going to take some space because I don’t want to get closer to someone who doesn’t want me” I have received no messages from him and I’m hoping I don’t so I can completely forgot about him because he isn’t right for me at all. I had to text him that message because I was stalking him on Instagram and he wasn’t replying back to my messages. It was fucking my head. I was thinking of blocking him but then again that’s mean so I sent him this message. I hope he gets the message that I’m moving on and I’m not waiting for him to make up his mind about me. After I sent him that text, I felt happy

[@hennaemaenaen4324]

@@FirstNameLastName-oe9hi omg I'm almost I'm the same situation atm. It hurts so much because we know each other for a bit over a month Now and when we wrote everything was awesome. But there were times where we wouldn't write for days. I started stalking him online and it just made me more upset because sometimes he was on for hours but wouldn't write me. I can't start a conversation all the time although if I write he responds immediately. So basically I'm in a constantly hurtful situation and it surprises me because we never physically met. Any advice and did he ever write you back?

[@nanKCAS]

I'm single as hell so I can't relate lol

[@tatenda1735]

NadiaKon Same.

[@thefemmeguide]

NadiaKon awww

[@luxuryqueen42]

NadiaKon you're still young and attractive (judging from your pic). Let the guy chase you. Never chase a guy.

[@karenzhang1020]

Lmao. Same here

[@stephanienoel2902]

That's ok. You can also use this advice with friends too that are flaky. I mean I think it's great for relationships but also friendships or just other people.

[@4elovechishe]

Do "no contact rule". They usually come back after that. If not, no contact rule helps you to forget about him too. So works both way.

[@veronicaferguson8548]

I called my guy out on his shit.Now im getting ignored. So later today i will do so again,i will say goodbye. Thank you for posting this.I will leave no open door none of that.

[@pinkunicornglitter]

Those women were so beautiful and seemed so nice! Their perspectives really humanised your advice and brought it to life :) Great idea, to the person who came up with that! :)

[@berrypunch1895]

Agreed 100%! Teaching men and women the tools to better understand one another and communicate feelings and standards is exactly what Matthew does every day. It's awesome to see some beautiful women talking about their experiences and showing how Matthew's advice relates. He doesn't want to give us coin phrases, he wants to give us the tools to communicate our intentions more clearly and confidently.

[@lvega5606]

Ro Pi - I actually don't think it was what she said that was so different, but that her guy had already decided he definitetly didn't want to date her anymore (likely due to another woman coming along in his life).

[@pinkunicornglitter]

Ro Pi - It's amazing how subtle changes in language can make such a difference in what you are communicating! When I realised that it changed everything.

[@pinkunicornglitter]

Lisa Vega - I agree - here it was obvious that he, for whatever reason, had lost interest in her. But her leaving the door open for him didn't communicate that he could lose her at any moment , and that's also where she went wrong. Apart from that I think she did a really good job of expressing herself, so his loss!

[@pinkunicornglitter]

Berry Punch - Exactly! I think that communication barriers are often due to a lack understanding of each person's perspective. Men and women do think differently and being able to talk each other's language is such a useful skill! :)

[@eliteiamfly]

I just did this and he replied quickly. This WORKS!!! First I hit him with the "hey pen pal"

[@LibraLife47]

Why do the women have to always do the correct thing when we gettn played in the first place...perplexed

[@dipdil4094]

Philana Malone True.

[@darktwisty6728]

Yeah. A guy needs to grow up like. My bf and I are on a break cuz hes not sure if he really wants me. And we've been dating nearly 4 years. I just text him have a good week and leave it at that. He did admit to missing me but hes dating to see if he wants me. Hm. Confused.. but like ya know these men be playing some bullshit..I'm 20 I ain't got time for a 22 year olds child like brain.

[@SandraShani1]

I'm sorry for that Hannah. I hope you can grow and heal from this situation.

[@pradeep2662]

this channel is for women mostly? why would he preach guys here lol typical females and their logic... ufff

[@susuilu]

I was asking myself the same thing

[@shabijavaheri2748]

Hi there, why would the right person pull away. Shouldn't let one go once they feel the urge to go. By right person, I don't mean that guy from a fairytale, I mean a man who values/understands/adores the woman he meets.

[@aoussfatimah691]

I swear to God, I had this same intention in about the same way you said it, but I was scared and hesitant but now thank God you confirmed it! You are amazing ! Thank you Matthew

[@nadjalavin7471]

I just wrote almost exactly this message to a guy who had disapeared for 6 days after making tentative plans to go out... and he IMMEDIATELY texted me back:)) Did not offer a specific make-up plan but did appologise.

[@farahliyana3753]

the fact is that if he is really into you, then you should not have to say all this. men should do all the effort, not just one-sided. men wont pull away if they really want to make it work. matt, can you do videos on guys who play mind games or guessing games? really need your advice on that please.

[@adamcorfman573]

Did you mean, "Both people need to put in the effort, not just one-sided?"

[@sixten7920]

"Men should do all the effort, not just onesided". You literally contradicted yourself.

[@redfather5342]

Aww no it's ether 50/50 or nothing

[@andrian007]

A lot of his advice won't apply to dudes like me, but I like watching his videos. He doesn't lecture and tell you what to do, he engages in conversations and talks to you and connects with you. He's cool, I think I'll watch more of his videos.

[@suzannedelonas392]

Matt could you make a video on a more serious subject? How to date after experiencing emotional abuse

[@changjoy6379]

Suzanne Delonas I was emotionally abused. He said that the relationship was not gonna be serious. I said that we should stay friends then. But he came to meet me again without mentioning anything about our last conversation. I don't know what to do.

[@jenavineful]

Once he said " the relationship isn't going to be serious" I would have believed him. Know what you want first. It's not up to him, how your relationships are going to be, it's YOUR choice ;-). Men will avoid difficult conversations because they aren't emotionally mature enough to have them. What's important to you? What do YOU want? How do YOU want things to go? Be clear with yourself, and the message will be easier to convey to others. It is in the not deciding what women really really want (and writing it down) that they wind up with the men that aren't right for them.

[@jenavineful]

Suzanne Delonas, after emotional abuse, you have to tread carefully if you are carrying on a relationship with the same person who was emotionally abusive. Set boundaries, know your deal breakers, before you get in a tight position. If you are in a new relationship, you have to still move carefully forward and be aware that each new person, is a new person, and careful not to throw your past relationship, into your future relationship. Maya De Angelou told Oprah Winfrey "when people show you who they are; believe them". I don't think who people are changes too much. They can get a greater education, and gain spirituality - and that can modify the course of someone's life, but who they are (values) do not change. It's the some of the best advice I can pass on to other women in the early stages of dating, and a good rule to follow when it comes to people.

[@TheElizabethjoanna]

My advice is you need to find someone to easy trust too .. become vulnerable and be your self if you see any red flags live but give a chance ..it's worth it a risk love existing and you too find someone who will respect you !

[@rahmans07]

Matthew you little genius, this worked a treat with my guy!! He was apologetic and made so much more of an effort! 10/10 would recommend 😂

[@vladuskable]

Selima Lima what was ur situation please? For how long was he gone when you sent this? Thank you

[@chrissame]

@@vladuskable Every Man will react differently. This guy probably just needed some prompting then he was fine.

[@amazingsupergirl7125]

If he’s pulling away, he’s not into you. Break up or divorce. Done.

[@olivianicole7715]

If only this video was here a month ago

[@2Bdanii]

Exactly my thoughts :(

[@1Dheartgirl]

Actually though!

[@personanongratano1]

Why? What did you do that was wrong a month ago?

[@nourr1259]

SAME

[@stormshadow401]

nope, not me

[@whatthereview369]

These ladies are all so incredibly beautiful! It's nice to see that even very beautiful women struggle with being discarded by guys they like. A lot of people think women like this are worshipped by all and get everything they want.

[@carrielegg5480]

Oh my goodness this works!!! I did this over the weekend with my boyfriend. It was super painful. I had fear of him leaving. But I couldn't stand living in confusion. Too draining. My boyfriend changed his tune. Showed up literally out of the blue. Both Saturday and Sunday. And said out of the blue. I am in this for the long haul..are you. I about fell over and been more in contact this whole week! This works. Just do it and let him be in fear of losing you and your Beautiful delicious life!!!

[@goodekata7968]

2347086892323) Message Mr winged the great and powerful man who can help you in any problem helps me bring my ex back .....

[@tslilbearshoppe9870]

if they don't give chase, they are not really that into you. PERIOD. Actions speak louder than words. That goes for friendships too. Don't chase ppl. Don't invest your time in people that don't invest theirs in you.

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

I just wrote down your comment. You'd think I'd know this information. I'm going on 60 years old. I guess I am still a work in progress. Thank you for your comment. 👍❤

[@tslilbearshoppe9870]

@@b.k.r.doggielover5449 me too going on 59...don't give up :)

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

@@tslilbearshoppe9870 Actually, I am going to be 59 in July. I usually say, I'm pushing 60. I actually have a huge crush on someone I met on KZbin. But, he's an introvert. And he lives 1000 miles away. But, there's no distance when it comes to the heart. Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate that. ❤👍

[@tslilbearshoppe9870]

B.K.R. Doggielover love knows no limits

[@b.k.r.doggielover5449]

@@tslilbearshoppe9870 You know how to make me feel better. Thank you!😁👍

[@cassylangston1755]

This is just the video I needed tonight because I've been falling for someone who I care about as a person and I feel like his been straining me along for a while and its been killing me inside

[@bridgete9881]

I love this, " I'm feeling some confusion from you, which is totally fine, but I'm going to take some space because I don't want to get closer to someone who's not sure what they want." I WISH I had this JUST the other day because I was searching for the words and ended up texting, "... I enjoy (spending time with you), but I think if we continue my emotions are going to get involved and I'm going to end up getting my feelings hurt." I think both convey the same meaning, but I think the way Matt put it was a bit more eloquent and puts a little more into the meaning. I really HESITATED a LOT before pressing send because I felt SO vulnerable actually expressing this to him.

[@ChristineEllwood]

If he’s pulling away, he can keep on going. I have value and if a guy cant see it then he’s not the right guy for me. A guy that is genuinely interested isn’t going anywhere.

[@AlwaysmilingPolitely]

If a guy is pulling away is there a good chance there is someone else? I see this happen not only with myself but other women.

[@nasimf1896]

AlwaysmilingPolitely I unfortunately think 90% of the time that's the case. There's always another 10% chance though that he is either not as interested in you anymore or he still does like you but is suddenly feeling too pressured n doesn't want to get too close bcuz of a reason, like not knowing what he wants or not wanting to settle down too fast

[@hearmymotoredheart]

There's a multitude of possible reasons, including being more interested in someone else or feeling less enthusiastic as when you started seeing each other. But I think that when it gets down to it, the reason doesn't matter as much as the action here. If he's actively disengaging, there isn't much you can do - his mind is made up. Trying to come up with things that'll persuade the guy to stay is just creating a climate of discomfort and resentment.

[@ohheypaula3108]

This has always been the case in my experience.

[@McFraneth]

Yes, there's other women. Painful to accept, but the truth.

[@clairesmith314]

Always another Woman

[@pazabalobrien9516]

I want to know about this more bc it helps in every field of my life not only dating. THAT strong is the position where he wants you to put yourself in. And I absolutely LOVE it.

[@AestheticStar]

Love this video. Currently in a situation like this with a guy that I've been talking to for 2 years, we've hung out & spent days together (we are long distance) but all the sudden he just doesn't text like he used to, says he's been busy, but I really feel like another girl has come up & he doesn't want to be honest. I really dislike that guys can't just be honest. So I think I might actually try this. I brought up with him recently how I felt things were changing, he claims they aren't but I can tell, obviously I'm not blind or stupid as this has happened before lol. Love your channel, thank you for the great advice & tips!

[@diegobastos2180]

I started watching these videos so that I could get a girl who supposed to be the love of my life... I ended up falling for Matt. Really obsessed. At 34. I never imagined it could happen

[@anateresajardim]

I swear I'm starting to get scared hahah Matthew always releases the perfect video at the exact time I need it! Thank you!

[@Jenn794u]

Used this today and the guy took the out. He said he understood and that his job can be quite demanding. A few minutes later he said he adored and missed me with a wink emoji. WTH???