Storytime! I was Introduced to Colorism by Black Women at 10 years old.

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[@mschoy1597]

Aaliyah is, in fact, MGM. Her parents and their parents and their parents before them - are all mixed-multi-generational-mixed.

[@ExoticalsUnited]

yup! i consider myself and all multiracials with 3 or more races to be "mgm" technically.

[@kameralkutie5594]

@@ExoticalsUnitedDid you see the dedication to her beautiful grandmother on the inside of her Aaliyah album cover?❤

[@ExoticalsUnited]

@@kameralkutie5594 oh no i didn't! i will have to check that out!

[@tameralynn3689]

​@@kameralkutie5594I saw her, she was beautiful. I'm a huge Aaliyah fan, her maternal grandmother was Native American, white, and black. Aaliyah is also of Jamaican descent from her Esther side.

[@tameralynn3689]

Father, not Esther

[@FunnyBunny216]

I had a friend who after going to the local swimming pool with her for the entire summer. After a time with us being at the pool. Her mother picked us up. Once we were in the car her mother said Victoria tell her how you feel. She looked at me and said when I am with you it makes me feel bad about myself. I was confused and saddened by my friend being hurt so I responded by saying omg I would never want you to feel bad. Her mother then said tell her what I told you. She then said my mom said I’m the type of girl that a man will want to marry your the type that he will just have sex with!!! I was about 12!!! I just stared at the back of her mothers head because she had a huge mole on the back of her head!!! To this day I can still see that damned mole lmfaooo!!! They are just sad!!

[@VaLEriE-en8xl]

OMG, that was a disgusting thing to say to a child and a disgusting thing to have your own child say to another child …smh. That just goes to show that adults will be sneaky sometimes when it comes to children because her mom probably would have NEVER said those things if ur parents were present. I am sorry u experienced that as a young child.

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Wtf! I’m not surprised at all

[@HappyGoLucky874]

This is disgusting ! Thank God you had the mole to focus on.

[@yahainHotPink]

😮😮😮😮

[@sashatasha9725]

Wow what was that mother trying to do to her daughter?!!! That's sick

[@Aries.Goddess30]

Being asked about being high yellow by a teacher is so insane!!! I would be so mad if someone singled out my child like that

[@thegiftofgabby5581]

I discovered that colorism existed through an episode of Tyra (her talk show). I was so shocked and appalled that this dark skinned girl disliked her skintone specifically. I had never heard of such a thing. I told my mom about it and she, being unambiguous, confirmed that many dark skinned girls/women feel that way. From then on, I really cared about colorism and eventually became a die hard Chrissie fan. Happy I found this channel so I can finally center myself and my experience while being empathetic toward others.

[@ExoticalsUnited]

right! it wasnt until the dark girls documentary came out that I had heard of people hating their actual skin.

[@kathleenking47]

This may have happened years ago, ..pushing light skinned people out. Many times, light skinned ended up with whites, and had white children Like Eisenhowers mom

[@soullooker]

Its crazy what teachers get away with lol.

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Right !

[@lester2588]

I learned that colorism was a thing when I moved to the US. I also wasn’t aware that I’m considered “light skinned” here. The comparisons, obsession with and policing of skin tones within the black American community has always been a cultural shock to me 🤯🤯🤯🤯

[@devanshepard9118]

where are you originally from?

[@lester2588]

@@devanshepard9118 I’m Caribbean Latina 🇨🇺

[@kathleenking47]

All non white groups Are colorist, anong each other

[@DOLCEKAYEXOTICAL]

@@UniversityofuncommonsenseAs a Haitian girl I can confirm that America is on a whole other level of skin tone obsession. It’s not like that in the DR Cuba and Haiti IN COMPARISON TO THE USA 🇺🇸

[@lester2588]

@@DOLCEKAYEXOTICAL Thank you for highlighting that there’s a huge difference ❤️

[@tameralynn3689]

When my mom was a teenager, most of her close friends looked like her. When she was a teenager, she'll put you in mind of Lisa Bonet when she was in the Cosby show. But all of my mom's close friends were ambiguos as well, the unambiguous blacks used to call them the Vanity girls (the lady from Prince's group), and also throwing insults by calling them vain because they had similar phenotypes. They were saying that they were pretty, but vain because they prefer to be around friends who looked like them. I don't think that's fair how they police who lightskin/mixed people prefer to hang around, they never ask darkskin people *"Why are all of your friends dark skin?"* They don't realize that all of them probably relate to one another better, don't have to be burdened by jelousy, or insecurity of unmabiguous darkskin friends; because my mom graduate highschool in the late 80s, so the Vanity, Lisa Bonets, Jane Kennedy, and Jennifer Beals looks were very popular.

[@devanshepard9118]

whats ironic is nowadays mostly uabw who still hold vanity,jayne kennedy and lisa bonet and mariah carey as standards of "black"beauty even though all those woman have a mixed background

[@tameralynn3689]

@@devanshepard9118 You're so right, they'll use that fictional *"one drop rule"* to include them for their convenience, then disregard them as black when they think they are a threat to them. I hate the collateral use of ambiguos people in the black community, that's why I love women like Jasmine Tookes, and Zoe Kravits because they don't pander, and they don't feel obligated to the black community. Don't you notice the ambiguos actresses who don't pander to black people have better career, and roles?

[@devanshepard9118]

@@tameralynn3689 Zoe Saldana the main one honestly I wish Halle berry would have took that route

[@Music45387]

🥲 I’m embarrassed that I used to believe ambiguous women who were mostly friends with other ambiguous women were all vain/colorist/elite/etc. Mixed girls only being friends with other mixed girls is a defense mechanism that keeps all the colorist bullying away.

[@tameralynn3689]

@@devanshepard9118 Oh yeah, I forgot about Zoe Saldana, see how she gets vast roles, instead the black movies like Meagan Good.

[@jeeperscreepers-jj3bz]

1 h 15 min!?!? THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABT ❤

[@ExoticalsUnited]

😂 this is my longest video to date !

[@IndigenousExotical]

Wow! Youre talking about the Nation of Islam. I was actually raised NOI and I want to talk so much about how destructive it was to me as a mixed child. 😮‍💨😮‍💨

[@ExoticalsUnited]

yes im pretty sure thats what some of my family members were for a while or at least they were listening to the talking points.

[@Music45387]

🤯 Omg… I never thought I would find another mixed girlie raised in the NOI in this space! EU, when I mentioned seeing colorism while going to a religious all-girl school, this is what I was hinting at!

[@IndigenousExotical]

@@Music45387 There are so many of us Exoticals who were raised NOI and we were brainwashed to pander and not question anything and that everything is just Black vs. White. That last bit is why it never sat 100% right with me.

[@yahainHotPink]

Thank you for sharing. Looking back, glad I did not go to an HBCU. Would have found out what colorism was called sooner and I would have been stressed out! 😮

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Yes it was definitely stressful having so many women gunning for me .

[@nikicarrie4071]

That's the only thing you would have ever heard

[@cringeLoop]

"Can you talk about being high yellow" 😂😂😂😂

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Right I was like 😮

[@nikicarrie4071]

Surprised Pikachu face 😂😂😂

[@mikhalaa746]

We're cute as kids but when we grown up certain female family members see us as competition. I cant tell you how many times a woman has accused me of trying to "seduce" her husband.🤦🏾‍♀️😒

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Yes to this day one of those same cousins still doesn’t talk to me yet asks about my personal life to my family members 😂

[@Demthorshie]

Yeah, this is exactly how it was for me too. I was the cute little LS black girl with the long pretty hair as a child and then I became the LS heifer that thinks she's better as an adult basically 🤣

[@nikicarrie4071]

Me too. This one woman was crazy. Always saying shit that meant no sense and trying to fight me

[@angelface333]

16:20 i relate to all this 😭 going from being endeared by the family to being treated like this bougie mischievous vixen and kind of cast aside after puberty by those same people. it’s such a heartbreaking transition. edit: that bougie “joke” is so weird. i’m so sorry that happened to you :/ AND THE TEACHER ASKING ABOUT BEING HIGH YELLOW WTF

[@ExoticalsUnited]

right! i was like wtf!!!!! i didn't realize until college that all those comments were based on those people stereotyping my phenotype.

[@ExotiKKuties]

Facts, me too. I still to this day seperate use from my family because it was so painful. Even when I look at pictures when I was blossoming, I noticed aunts and cousins stepped far from me or turned their backs towards me instead of hugging me or turning towards me or stand close to me how they did each other. They really still act that way so I stopped coming out.

[@keirahleesha486]

I remeber my aunt said in front of all my cousins & me that I was the “boujee” one…. Lmaoooo after she said that all I could think was I’d rather be known as boujee than a hood rat🤷🏽‍♀️😂

[@vwd3437]

I can relate to so much in this story time! And I’m scotch caramel! I plan on celebrating myself very soon with a butterscotch caramel cake lol for de-centering men, healing past trauma, embracing my beauty, etc.!

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Omg that’s an amazing idea ! 😍

[@divinecreation1217]

I was talking to my cousin about why i felt my siblings treated me weird (my half sister is a DSBW) and my cousin who is very light pretty much and she is closer to my sister than I….straight up told me it’s because I look more mixed and that my ancestry shows up in my phenotype which makes me look more Hispanic/ Exotic. And it’s stuff I’ve heard before but because they are my siblings… i never really saw it that way. Colorism runs deep. It is sad. I never get invited out. They never celebrate my good news but I’ve always been supportive

[@CGK0196]

Colorism is toward dark people not light

[@misguidedpearls7456]

Im a brown skin girl...and. yea in the black community ur stories are very very very true...yet they will deny it to your face❤❤❤❤ Its scary how much colorism we have

[@sashad1076]

I don’t think the teachers should’ve said something about that. It’s also very strange that a male teacher would say something like that to impressionable young girls.

[@tylilawilliams5898]

Right!!

[@_komiichan9509]

My first experience with colorism happened when I was 18. I moved to New Orleans for college, an HBCU. My roommate and I were outside talking and this random dude walked up to us and he told me I wasn’t as light as my roommate. (I’m Fenty 390 and my roommate is 370) I said OK and we just stared at each other. I guess he was expecting a response out of me, but I was just confused by the statement, so I just ignored him. He got mad and eventually left. I experienced texturism and featurism my entire life. People pulling my hair to see if it’s real and constantly being asked what I’m mixed with. Only for them to get mad at me when I told them I wasn’t mixed.

[@DOLCEKAYEXOTICAL]

Oh I would have given that teacher HELL. This is basically how I responded to adults at that age for mess like this: “I’m just a child you should talk to my parents about that I’ll let them know you want to speak with them ”

[@nikicarrie4071]

Perfect ❤

[@WarmSun_MGM]

36:00 white teachers are so cringe 😂😂😂 i had a teacher ask me in front of the class how i like to be identified racially when we were talking about loving vs virgina. I had another teacher tell me im not a real black person when i corrected her on a comment she made about our hair. She adopted two kids from Africa and thought she knew it all lol.

[@mrsali254]

😮😐

[@AprilHarmony9]

Ditto!!!!! WW are nerve-wrecking when it comes to us ok. Don't get me started on white females who feel they everything about non-white culture based on we they know (black, mixed or whatever). They are cringe as hell😂😤🤦‍♀️

[@Aries.Goddess30]

So disrespectful 😒

[@AprilHarmony9]

My comments are always getting deleted 🤭😂 OMG I swear .......

[@Demthorshie]

I've been compared to Left Eye from TLC appearance wise for years 🤣My mother has Latin American/Caribbean roots so that might be why. IDK I didn't even know I was light skinned until my mother (she's dark skinned) told me I was. I grew up in a predominantly wyte neighborhood so I was only ever seen as just black, no one ever put a skin tone on me or acknowledged my admixtures until I moved away and started having other BW friends.

[@PrettyWorldwideOfficial]

Just started listening and it's already so relatable!! I grew up being treated differently depending on who I was around at the time. Sometimes I'm the lightest in the room, sometimes I'm not. My family looks like the Cosbys lol! My family cookouts are just like yours! I have all racial backgrounds in my extended family too and how I looked was never a problem unless I was around my unambiguous family members of all skin complexions.

[@Dash-of_love]

I know this is way off and not on topic, but I was watching a episode of Queen chioma on draya who is now pregnant,and I just can't stand the fact that people are just jealous of the fact that she is this old and still beautiful and can still pull that guy and if they where in her shoes they would too...and I get the fact that he is young but he knows what he was doing, stop acting like he was a virgin.He has a lot of options are they mad he chose her even if she is so called washed up?

[@devanshepard9118]

pple dont go at drake for messing with younger woman but the hate draya gets is 2 much

[@Aries.Goddess30]

They would never drag male rappers for predatory dating, tho

[@hotcarmel12]

One of my Grandneices will be 17 soon. Her mom purposely got pregnant by the whiest mixed man as she only dated pretty boys them. My Grand looks very ambiguous with full African facial features like Faith Evans. What her Mom didn't realize how hard it would be for her daughter to have safe dark skin black girls as friends. And older BW started making comments about her as a baby toddler. A so called lifetime friend, who dark skin has blamed my Grand for her self esteem issues. She brought it up in therapy! My Grand is not going to an HBCU. I am so glad! Even though ALL of the black history figures are biracial or mixed. All of my Grands friends are mixed, latina or white. As dark skinned BG at her school hate her because of Dusty black boy attention. I may recommend her to this channel when she turns 18.

[@WantaFanta1]

Omg people try to roast me and call me Hilary Banks, Wheatley on different world and my siblings called me bye Felicia. Also I work in medical field patients who are white always talk about my pretty skin tone. I can tell they really like my skin tone for some reason. Especially durning the summer when I get that reddish bronze tan look. But my family or people in my community will be like ugh why you so dark durning the summer time. They don’t like it. Black people say I am just black and want to make sure to remind me white people will only see that and that I am not different etc. It’s crazy not black enough not white no allies. We need each other lol no one wants to claim us when it’s important or really back us up. But expect us to back them up always and forever! I am close to honey,slightly yellow but defiantly Carmel durning the summer.

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Omg Wheatley! That was the other one I couldn’t remember her name ! 😂

[@ExoticalsUnited]

And that’s exactly why we need these spaces! 😍💅🏽

[@WantaFanta1]

@@ExoticalsUnitedLOL right! I dont get offended I think its funny. But I am not even as light as them.They I will be upset but I like those characters lol

[@WantaFanta1]

@@ExoticalsUnited I was dying laughing when you said Hillary! But I do have her hair and similar features but she is lighter that me. And I also talk similar to her lol

[@user-wk4uq5bi4n]

I have olive skin tone and growing up, I also had a darker face than my body and have eczema apparently it's like an auto-immune disease. Wearing the lighter foundations or the more brown foundations never work for me. I finally found a brand with olive shade that blends in with my natural skin tone. So for olive skin tone it can go anywhere from looking light to looking brown but the undertone is different so it never blends properly and looks patchy/ashy.

[@yasminogbu8929]

Ow my gosh! I am based in the UK London. I was a backing dancer for Chaka Khan she was in UK promoting her single “ Like Sugar” . She was really lovely to me! She even guessed I was a Virgo based my face shape. But she named me“ Red bone “ 😂😂😂 ! I didn’t know what that meant ! Until hearing this video 😭😭 Mad! I also danced for Keri Hilson years ago and she was soooooo rude to me about my hair texture ! She said why don’t you straighten it or press it! Like she said it in a really rude way to me rehearsals, such a b****. I was brought up in Wales 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 which is a super rural white village vibe country. I never herd off the term “ being light skinned“ until I came to London 🤦🏽‍♀️ People made me aware of it! I had no idea that this was an actual thing! 🫠… I was treated black & seen to be black in white areas. When I go to Europe they don’t really get the light & dark skinned thing as for as far as I’ve experienced.. you’re black or you’re not. Also some people refuse to acknowledge that I have received racism.. why because I’m light skinned 🫠.. ! Unreal!’ Where I’ve probably been through more racism than them being brought up in the rural areas in Wales! It’s a huge subject! I really appreciate your videos ❤️

[@Minkunleashed]

I feel like my mom really protected me from having to experience things like these so intensely/ also a way of keeping me “humble”. We never went to schools where it mostly black people and most of my friends have been some type of Hispanic.

[@ExoticalSauce]

I have experinces with family members either ignoring me or trying to humble me because of my phenotype. But a lot of these colorism incidents come from the blk matriarch, " you aint going nowhere with me with them naps in yo head" or blk men of all ages! at least is my experience.

[@strudelh]

I never even knew colorism was a real word until middle school. I probably would’ve known earlier if I still went to my black k-12 school. We had uniforms too! I was always getting picked on by UABG(girls) and teachers (one screamed in my ears once 💀) even though I pretty quiet. Literally the only friend I had was an MLS girl, and it was a pretty big school lol.

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Oh yeah just wait until I tell the texturism stories I’ve got lots of stories about that!

[@cmw1336]

Can't wait!! 🤗

[@munirayussuf8558]

Yay 🎉 love your longer videos.

[@tylilawilliams5898]

That teacher doesn't realize she most likely destroyed the self esteem of those UDSG by saying that after they were praising her and saying she was beautiful etc and turning around and say "oh I could never be on the magazine bc they would never put me on it bc of my skin tone"

[@Mixedtrini777]

When lived in Trinidad, my first exposure to colorism was 14 years old. I’m the lightest among my siblings, They called me “redzz” a lot. ( which is the Trinidadian version redbone lol).

[@timaicalopez2441]

Im in Trinidad right now..down here is rel pressure

[@Mixedtrini777]

@@timaicalopez2441 yah tellin meh .Stay strong 😮‍💨

[@ExotiKKuties]

Wow, For me it was getting teased for looking white and having green eyes and having “big witch hair” and being called a “Heather” because of my Last name. I was in Kindergarten and there was a two white kids in my class but the UAB Kiddos didn’t ever pick on them, just me for not being white a looking closer to the white kiddos. They would even tell me their moms said not to play with me because I was gong to think I’m ‘better than somebody’ crazy part, I didn’t know I was mixed and didn’t learn I had green hazel eyes until I was in 6th grade 🤦🏽‍♀️ I had bad eyesight 🤓 My third grade teacher tried to go there with me. Mrs. Robinson always said I seem like a grown woman, my mom said I looked like adults she was jealous of. I swear it started with a magazine collage where I noticed she didn’t like me because I found women who looked like me an clipped out fashion and dressed them with other clippings. Crazy how UABW who teach don’t deal with those internal views within themselves before teaching.

[@kevikombatin5413]

Yes @exoticalsunited from my experience featurism does play a big part in how UABW are treated. Most people assume I am UA mostly because my skin tone due my mom being black and dad is Mixed. Once they get up close enough and see I have soft/ambiguous features they get more friendly and social.

[@Embraceyourcurls24]

I can definitely relate to this.

[@exoticallovergirl]

Lol off topic but why do some of the kids look like they just got threatened to sit still "or else" 😂

[@cynthiapickett7403]

The more stories like this I'm hearing, I probably should be grateful that my father's family (he was born in Alabama) moved north to Ohio when he was a boy (they moved to CA when I was an infant). No doubt colorism is through the roof, especially in the Gulf States.

[@cmw1336]

"EU can you speak on the experience of being high yellow?" Gasp...😮

[@Hairbytyra.s]

25:45 I am so sorry that you went through that…

[@thegiftofgabby5581]

I didn’t know about colorism yet, but I remember seeing an albino model in a magazine as a little kid, and thinking “all the boys must love her…she has light eyes AND hair AND skin” lol. So interesting remembering that as an adult.

[@ExoticalSauce]

"like Who tf is Hilary"😂😂😂

[@bjr8080]

I was 4 and the only light skin person in my family. My grandmother used to say that I was mean and I was always silent. It was bullying and I didn’t know what to call it back then. I broke that curse as soon as my mother said the same about my son. His father and I both are light skinned. People don’t talk about how some of us leave our entire families behind because of colorism and the abuse that comes with it! You are hated for how you are born.

[@lalarose9907]

I can relate to a lot of things you were saying! I am still reminded constantly of my complexion as an adult😩. When I'm out and about, some guys, that are completely strangers when they speak to me, they will say, "what's up light skin", Or "how you doing lightskin".... There are sometimes that I use to correct them and say in a question, "Now why you gotta refer to me as a skin tone?" ( I don't say it in a rude way or anything, I say it in a polite enough way.) They most likely use to smile, or say something about my tall height too, (I'm 5'9 1/2)... I now don't even correct them or say anything back, I'll just smile and say thank you like if they are opening a door for me or something like that. I post my food on facebook the other day and got a comment from a guy saying "You lightskin , you can't cook!"... I just put a laughing emoji as a response🤷‍♀.

[@nikicarrie4071]

You should have said look at mr homeless 😂

[@sys691]

Remember NY & CO yeah i was raised by an AKA in 04

[@nikicarrie4071]

Not your mom buying you clothing 😂 what was she thinking

[@Aries.Goddess30]

I feel so bad that your negative church experiences drove you away from Christianity. 💔💔 did you ever confide in your black dad about people treating you differently? How did he react?

[@ExoticalsUnited]

Yes my dad supports me and he is nice about everything (both of my parents are)

[@poppyhazard4526]

"Or whatever."

[@ExoticalsUnited]

I know ! I need to stop saying that 😂😂😂

[@mistrylyra5848]

@@ExoticalsUnitedno you don’t, I hate when people police how others speak. The message was clear and I actually never noticed

[@AprilHarmony9]

Hey, I say "or whatever" alot too. Don't worry about it LOL

[@0823047938]

I am in the shade 300 in fenty but have two black parents. I know not of any admixture in my bloodline. I have a nose with a raised bridge a slim body type with a full bust and flat tummy and people always question my tone and features. 🤷🏾‍♀️ so hey we are absolutely discriminated against but people expect us to not be offended 🙄