Falling Asleep Watching Movies: John Green Solves Your Problems #70

[@BanthaTube]

GET THAT KID FROM YOUR YOUTH SQUAD INTO TRAINING!! When he turns 16 promote him to your senior squad. Look at his Potential numbers - he's going to be as good as the Greens in no time!!

[@fisheatsyourhead]

He could be the Green's adopted son!

[@Maximusbuckelew]

Big Phat Walrus +

[@charlie-wf3bn]

wait "it's not 2019 in real life" wait

[@mariewikiwaka3851]

Vincent Strange I think he means the 2019 season???? If he doesn’t then I feel that level of exhaustion too.

[@machiel5888]

marie wikiwaka I think he just records these wayyyyy in advance

[@mariewikiwaka3851]

Big Mac The P4A was in December though so he’d have had to record this one way before all the other ones that have been posted.

[@cascade9584]

He also referenced Avengers: Endgame which came out this year

[@darkstark907]

Did John just say it wasn't 2019

[@fisheatsyourhead]

@@MrElectrikFeel Except his game IS in 2019 as well, look at his emails a second after he said that

[@cascade9584]

He also referenced Avengers: Endgame which came out this year

[@futurehistory2110]

I was confused too. I'm guessing he meant the 2019 of the game is a different timeline than our 2019? But he explained it poorly haha.

[@qdHazen]

♫ He's big! He's brash! He stole his husband's 'stache! Other John Green! Other John Green! ♪

[@해림-c9e]

"he's as cool as the other side of the pillow" THAT.

[@ohrwein7154]

"Its as cool as the other side of the pillow" yeah, Im going to steal that phrase

[@machiel5888]

Are these actually recorded over 6 months in advance? It sounded like it wasn’t 2019 yet when he recorded this.

[@tomwhitham1538]

He mentioned Brighton vs Man City and that was May so must have been relatively recent.

[@cascade9584]

He also referenced Avengers: Endgame which came out this year

[@Bduboff]

I can't wait for when AFC Wimbledon plays Liverpool so John gets truly conflicted.

[@elibundy3613]

Just a guess here, but the 2019 comment may relate to the fact that John is playing FIFA 18, not 19.

[@ScottKorin]

Ok, so lets talk about the clues about whether this is 2019 or not... John says it's not 2019 at 2:58 John admits to falling asleep during "the Avengers movie" at 4:59. Which one??? He says reviews say it was the greatest cinematic achievement ever, so I'm assuming he means ...Age of Ultron ;) ... no, I mean Endgame At 5:43, John mentions that Henry was swimming in a pool the other day. So this isn't a late 2018 video...unless they were in Florida at the time. At 10:21: "In 2019, in the age of fractured attention" Ok, so this is 2019.

[@theboard05]

John, you have to train your players. You can make a lot of progress over the course of a season, if you do it every week--even just simulating the training works. Here are some high potential players you can get for relatively little money: Left back: Marc Cucurella Ryan Sessegnon Rico Henry Left mid/wing: Andre Green Right mid/wing: Ferdinando Del Sole Matty Cash Emmanuel Latte Lath

[@szymonsobiepanek384]

Thanks for the advice, John! We'll use some of them. For now, I figured out that my fiancée never falls asleep in cinemas, so we go more often. The last time we went it was me who fell asleep. We are made for each other.

[@josephcraven6362]

Hey John I think Joe Gomez (Liverpool’s own) might be a good shout as he can be a replacement or start in any defensive position or Maya Yoshida who plays for Southampton is also good

[@TomHenryTography]

That last goal on you at the end...JUST FLIPPING CLEAR THE BALL

[@heikothedwarf]

Outside midfielders: James Forrest, Rachid Ghezzal, Christian Cueva, Junior Hoilett, Valentin Stocker Left backs: joevin jones, erik durm These guys are probably pretty pricey but will be big upgrades

[@Norn13b]

++

[@MattJammer]

I like the idea of "Parrot the Platypus." His goal song could be a cover of "Perry the Platypus": Dean Parrot! Parrot the Platypus!

[@kopftheater]

How is Little JJ Green doing these days? Is he in school yet?

[@ScottKorin]

His name is Henry and he's like 10. Alice is almost 6?

[@kopftheater]

Scott Korin No, I mean the kid that Bald and Other John Green had a few Seasons ago. I think I remember it correctly that his Name was John John Green, Shortened to JJ.

[@ScottKorin]

@@kopftheater Oh, right! Duh!

[@musman9853]

does john not know you can chain together the triggers and buttons to do like 200 different celebrations. there's literally a settings page telling you all the celebrations

[@whatsinaname7289]

OMG Francombstein's goal is one for the books!!😅😎😎

[@doneisenbarth]

Francomb’s goal was amazing! I think Wimbledon has a real shot to make some waves in the Premier League this season.

[@sambitnes]

Get Jordan Lukaku (Romelu Lukaku’s brother) he is a fast and strong left back And relatively cheap

[@enriqueDFTL]

Great opening match!

[@kelsiedonaldson]

So early! Best part of Monday mornings:)

[@maxravenwood3877]

2:58 was this prerecorded or does John have a sense of humor I don't understand? Edit: 10:21 what??

[@emyleemargaret]

i'm so glad i wasn't the only one who noticed this...

[@cascade9584]

He referenced Avengers: Endgame which came out this year

[@whatsinaname7289]

Yaaay! The wimbly wombly's 1st prem league game!

[@qdHazen]

♫ Bald John Green, John Green! When he scores we have a bash! But where is his sweet mustache?! Bald John Green, John Green! ♪

[@ThisIsReMarkable]

May I recommend Aaron Ramsdale for keeper?

[@eddiemontenegro4524]

Anwar El Ghazi (RM), Jores Okore (CB), Aymen Barkok (RW), Andre Green (LM), Blas Riveros (LB)

[@jazibshamsi2619]

Hey John, You are in 2019 in real life. Get a few players on pre-contracts on expiry in 2020 or 2019. I don't know where you at.

[@ieuanx361]

that Frankenstein goal just ended a mans career

[@mellow-mike]

Keito Nakamura - RM/CAM - ~$600k Darren McIntosh-Buffonge - CM/CAM/RM/LM - ~$700k Ronald José Hernández Pimentel - RB - ~$700k Nathan Holland - LM/RM - ~$600k Owen Wijndal - LB - ~$700k

[@CJonestheSteam72]

It could be that your fiance is stressed and then relaxes when she starts watching a film.... Lights out

[@tuuuttuuut7752]

How do these videos only have so little views?!

[@pdxDavid]

The only celebration needed is the Dead Fish.

[@dingalingmasterpiecetheater]

I miss Dicko, Deeney, Akinfenwa n LaBamba.

[@patrickgillespie5506]

Great game for the neutrals lol. So, you’re going to want to get loaned players. You can look in SA for young players to buy on the cheap, but even then it’s gonna be tough. You’ll want to go for the 3rd and 4th choice players from the top 6 clubs. Kyle Walker-Peters on Spurs is a great fit imo for the club. Not sure Spurs will loan him out, but I’d absolutely go after him

[@ryanhines8080]

This is incredible. Has John ever scored 5 goals in a game? And the premier league no less!

[@roemerhelwig3345]

You could try to sign Daniele Verde from Roma

[@pultronix]

Mathis Bolly is a solid choice for outside midfield. He’s cheap and super fast. I think in general you would benefit from some speed on the outside midfield, there are some guides online for cheap speedy players, that’s where I found Bolly.

[@willsi]

John's conception of time, haha! :)

[@thomasbuckley6999]

What year is it oh mighty John? We demand answers

[@belgianbv]

So I guess you could try to sign youth prospects some of them can be really good from the start. I always try to sign keeping prospects and train them really hard, because they have fewer things to train they train really fast. Then they have huge value and you can sell them for a lot of money.

[@lukeomalley2506]

I have so many questions about what year it is in real life after watching this video

[@davekennedy9036]

10 minutes of research on youth players article on fafi

[@aleballos]

If this is FIFA 18, you can get Jadon Sancho for around $2.5 million. Can play left and right winger with an 86 potential. Also an English international!

[@abedalsyed]

You can always get players on loan and you can split their wages with thier club. Also, try your best to win the Carabao cup to get Europa League football, that will bring you a lot of money.

[@dionpawkins5730]

Ezequiel Barco from Atlanta United (can reach 88)

[@6aloolq8]

Legend

[@kevinengel2134]

Moral of the story here is that we're going to give up a ton of goals. Can the John Greens score enough to stay up?

[@messyhair42]

Is it possible to love your kids but hate the youth?

[@ayushagarwal1342]

14:56 WHAT'S THE SONG CALLED???

[@davekennedy9036]

Use the found money like how you got rich last year

[@ggeor1578]

Search for free agent players(especially 17 and 18 year olds) if you're lucky you might find a gem and you'll only have to pay his wages

[@kelsiedonaldson]

Wait what year is it

[@misterminecraftyeah]

Maybe have a look in the brazilian player market

[@lily-_-]

In what weird alternate universe did Aaron Ramsey move to Southampton??

[@davekennedy9036]

Loans give you a decent feel and free scouting if you want to by them free agents same... but cheap scouts that are not assign to any country those are both ways to save some money initially and then use your in-game coin from the side menu that you earn for free to give you more money 2 then be the best you can be

[@sophieschofield9364]

i have an exam tomorrow and its currently 12:13am and i should be asleep but hey cant not watch this

[@elibundy3613]

Sophie Schofield good luck!

[@boundbythecurve]

John, you just said it's not 2019. I checked the upload date. You definitely made this video in 2019. Are you ok?

[@Lewis-oy1ol]

Sign Amon. Cheap and fast

[@Lewis-oy1ol]

sign nketiah or daka or boubacar kamara; all young and cheap and good

[@ElijahCem]

When’s pacifist fortnight coming back?

[@darkstark907]

He said in a Livestream the other day he was doing more later in the year during P4A! :)

[@jessicadayla]

Starts the video with human trafficking...