Fantasy Romance author gets an Arranged Marriage

How did I meet my husband? A matchmaker.
I know some people have said they like reading about Arranged Marriage books, but would never want one in real life. I am not one of those people, haha. I honestly think I was so open to the idea because I read so many Arranged Marriage Romance books, not gonna lie.
(Arranged marriage should not be confused with forced marriage, just so we're clear.)
I am a 21st century Romance author, but I was still able to live out the Arranged Marriage love story of my dreams with the man who is now my cuddle buddy, chief logistics officer, back-up camera man, and so much more. I am incredibly, incredibly blessed.
Someday, we'll have to talk about everything Christian does to help run my shop, create my videos, and keep me supplied with reading material. For now, just know he's really awesome, and I think our love story is super cool.

[@anna-friedavandyk]

That is legitimately pretty cute- I can just imagine all the things going through his head at that moment XD

[@kristenskousen1317]

I once overheard my sister complaining to my mom about how hard dating is and finding the right man and "can't you just arrange our marriages?" My mom retorted, "Why, so I can do all the work for you? Heck no!"

[@ashleykennedy2824]

I managed to find my other half organically, but watching Gen Z trying to date has me wondering how bad arranged marriages really are. 😂

[@bryanwoods3373]

I forget where I read it, but I think it was the actors of Pride and Prejudice talking about courting. They said they wanted to bring that back because the rigid structure made the whole process so much easier and less confusing. Everyone playing by the same rules.

[@fatisummer9106]

My mom said the same thing but after a week she send me a list with guys and their profile and contact numbers ,they were long distance family ,her friends kids ,coworker kids and just rundom ppl she thought they were fine and she wrote "Ok ,I was just bored so...."

[@kristenskousen1317]

@@fatisummer9106 That's really funny 😂

[@whydoineedanameiwillneverp7790]

​@@ashleykennedy2824I am an Indian, and honestly, arranged marriages are _fine_ ... _Forced_ marriages are an issue, but arranged marriages? Most of my friends agree that life is much better with the option of arranged matches in the picture. IMO romanticism is a spectrum just like sexuality is one. Many people are on the 'lower' end of the scale, and romance, as seen in rom-coms, is just not that important to them. But finding a person to share life with, to maybe have kids with, to do the whole in sickness and in health thing with - that's still important to them. "Head over heels" love is not something they experience, or at least not something they value highly - just like ace folks don't experience or value lust. Arranged marriages are perfect for them. No point starting at 'do we have a great romantic chemistry' if that's not important to you - start at 'will we make a good partnership and do our life goals match' and go from there. Treat a marriage like a business partnership - because ultimately, that's what it is, if you're closer to the aromantic end of the scale.

[@arjunheart5859]

D&D: the true matchmaker. I met my wife through my college's D&D club, we hit it off, and the rest is history.

[@meganofsherwood3665]

There was this guy in our LARP/D&D group I'd known as a kind of extended friend for awhile, and yeah, he was pretty cool, and was always talking about neat things, but that was it...and then he took over DMing for our group's second campaign, and we messaged back & forth a lot over...character stuff, and...yeah, he finally asked me out as the campaign wound down, and we got married 14 months later 😂❤

[@songindarkness]

My university anime society was the starting point of so many long term relationships and at least 3 marriages including me and my husband. 😂

[@AngelaCSpears]

This checks out. Really, getting to spend time with people in a relaxed setting does wonders for getting to know them and seeing if you are compatible.

[@sei916]

“oh im gonna date him, eventually” honestly thats adorable

[@AshleyHankey]

Reminds me of what I did haha a friend messaged me and I let him know my look taste cause his sister who I tried to get with gave my fb to him. So I basically gave him the keys. We met in person and I told him to ask me out as we both were teasing each other to bring the other to break and kiss or something. He asked me out I said yes we been together since 2017 and we are expecting a girl on the 11 of May.

[@heatherglover7789]

totally something I would say, hopefully would come off just as adorable... I hope. Anyways, I've been married to my best friend for almost two years because I thought, why not give it my very best shot. Turns out I was right. I'm as gay as I thought I was, we're still staying married though, we're both very happy

[@auroraa.writes]

That “proposal” was the best thing ever! You two are definitely made for each other 😂

[@dablackkitten302]

When you said "I realized I was bad at it" I felt that sentence in my soul.

[@mercycunningham2813]

As a fellow author and dungeon master I was like "AWWW is she going to gift him his first own D20?" You should totally get him a fancy dice set for your next anniversary, if he still plays that is.

[@tuvelat7302]

When I was single, my parents offered to help me find a guy. I was tempted to agree out of pure curiosity as to who/what they thought I would be compatible with. lol. I met my husband through a dating site.

[@StealthMarmot_]

"Yeah I'm going to date him, eventually." I love the tone of that considering you were showing him D&D, and it just feels like it had the undertone of "Yeah yeah, going to date, relationship, maybe love or marriage, whatever, I'm a little focused right now! Do you have ANY idea how much my group needs someone to play a cleric for party balance?? His Fridays are just, OPEN! Do you realize how rare that is?"

[@dreamof_me]

I’ve learned that men know very quickly when they truly want someone in their lives. It’s cute he knew basically on your first official date

[@omaimaf9963]

Well in my (muslim) country for people who do arranged marriages it‘s pretty much just that, but instead of a matchmaker it‘s your parents and you go on an arranged date and if you like each other, you have an engagement period (usually one to 2 years) where you make sure of your decision, and then you get married. My parents only met on their wedding day, but they exchanged a lot of letters (perfumed from my mom’s side, apparently the mailman teased him about it) and they’re still happily married today. What some people are describing in the comments is a forced marriage, which is disgusting.

[@songindarkness]

The term arranged marriage and forced marriage is pretty much interchangeable in English. And while I’m glad that your country is more relaxed about it, and your parents had a good marriage, certainly there are places where arranged marriage = forced marriage still exists or it did in the past. And even more relaxed attitudes to arranged marriages involve living up to culturally enforced gender roles and expectations. Also, if you’ve only ever met someone for a few dates or two, how are you meant to really know what it’s like to be married? Agreeing to marry the only option you’ve ever really had is not really the same making sure of your decision. Divorce may not be an option or is not an option for the woman, only the man. And often if you do fall in love with someone who is not approved of, there is trouble from the family.

[@omaimaf9963]

@@songindarkness yeah forced marriage is probably done in every country in the world, if someone doesn’t have the option to say no then it’s forced. But in the case I’m talking about it’s at least a year getting to know each other (my parents exchanged actual physical letters for a year because they didn’t know they both had a phone), and yeah if the wedding date approaches then it’s very had to change your mind, and yeah some people don’t get the luxury of divorce (if there’s children in the mix most women feel too trapped to get a divorce). But that is a universal issue not really tied to how a couple met.

[@gubruikertje]

​@@omaimaf9963forced marriage is not done in every country at all. In fact, in most western countries it is probably impossible. What then ends up happening is people going back to their ancestral country (or tricked/forced to go back in a lot of women's cases).

[@randomobserver8168]

Those terms are not interchangeable in English. @@songindarkness

[@HI-cb4wi]

​@@gubruikertjeforced marriages are still done in western countries esp the usa

[@maevethefox5912]

That's super adorable, honestly, but I don't know if I'd call it an arranged marriage? Like my friend graduated college and his parents were just like "here's your wife" and showed up with a woman he'd never met before. They did get some time to get to know each other before the actual ceremony and get on very well now, but there was absolutely zero courtship or choice involved.

[@giordanodsouza9563]

There's more than one approach to arranged marriage. All my friends' arranged marriages were more like the parents pick out some candidates based on specific criteria they're looking for in an in-law and compatibility test results and their kid gives feedback, declines meetings entirely or goes on the dates but they always have the option to decline at any stage. Both parties have to agree to the arrangement to move on to finding the auspicious marriage date and event planning. It's like app dating except thousands of years older.

[@TheRenegade...]

There's a pretty wide spectrum between arranged marriages and not-at-all-arranged marriages

[@user-jn4sw3iw4h]

It was pretty much 'arranged upon request' , 'with back-out options' and 'no obvious time-pressure' but arranged it was.

[@jlammetje]

they were set up, but that's definitely not an "arranged marriage".

[@lirazel6414]

I met my husband of blessed memory through Dial-a-Date, so there's no form of "set-up" I disapprove of. I hope you have a long and happy marriage - I did!

[@user-lt7ff1tg9f]

Growing up my parents hosted lots of dinner parties and I kind of day dreamed that they'd set me up one with with a son of one of their friend's... I grew up and realised I would have to do the work all by myself. 😭

[@anamazing2297]

That's so sweet! Loved the D20 in the ring box! 😆 I met my husband in a Taco Bell drive-thru, and he gave me his number on my receipt (which I still have). 😄

[@CharlesStacyII]

That is the most amazing "How we met" story Ive ever heard.

[@RecklessFables]

I'm so used to her being in-character I was confused, at first.

[@kilerog]

"I think we should date." Holy shit, yes, if only more people were willing to be direct about stuff like this, everyone's life would be so much better!

[@ibaifernandezbarea4131]

Okay this is really cute hsdfksa I hope you two get to live a long, happy life!! Hugs to you two!

[@ElizabethMoon-n8m]

Sometimes the generational differences are...noticeable. We were both college students at the same university. My husband and I met at a Baptist Student Union fund-raising project: clearing second growth oak scrub from an acre or so. He was in the Baptist Student Union. I was not; I'd been invited to go on this junket by a couple of fellow college students who lived in my residential hall because I played accordion, could play any song someone could hum or sort of sing. It meant a free meal. I was in a low emotional state, firmly not interested in looking around at boys, especially Baptist boys. At the site, the landowner had tools to hand out. I picked out a well-balanced machete--I had helped friends of my mother clear brush on their place in S. Texas. There were only two axes; this is significant. My future husband glommed onto one of them. Axes were the only way to grub out the roots of the oak saplings. Since I had a recent disappointment to work off, I settled into reducing one oak sapling after another to a four to six inch tall stob in the ground without pause; young pin oak and water oak is a lot easier to whack down than S. Texas trees like Texas Ebony which has an iron hard heartwood. So I needed help from an axe guy. The other axe wielder, however, had a girlfriend with whom he spent more time than he did grubbing roots, and she was very slow at chopping off oaks. So...my future husband spent considerable time grubbing the roots of my labors. Which put him close enough I couldn't ignore him. As it happened, he had good shoulders and chest (to which I'm partial) and his drill in ROTC had given him good posture. My determination that I wasn't on the hunt for a new boyfriend softened all through that sweaty morning and afternoon, and he seemed pleased, not shocked, by my ability with the machete. (Among the other males, I'd say most found it somewhat intimidating and kept their distance. I'd been told before I was "scary." Along with plain, too outspoken, etc.) So then came suppertime, and food (yay!) and we sat beside each other on benches and actually chatted. I announced my intention of writing books and living in the country. His at the time was to be a missionary doctor...something that interested me not at all. Sigh for those shoulders and chest. But. Something happened. It shocked both of us, but in a good way. He suddenly reached over and pulled me down in his lap. He'd never done that before with anyone (I found out later) and I'd never let anyone do anything like that with me. I lay there with my head in his lap, looking up and thinking "Why am I not ripping his throat out? and then realizing that I felt *safe*. Not exactly happy...but safe. I'd never felt safe, really safe, with anyone before. There were lots of twists, turns, bumps in the road, and a tangle of religion to sort out before we actually married, but almost 55 years later we still are married and delighted to be so. Challenges aplenty, and the richer, poorer, sickness, and health phrases all emerged a concrete experience. But I did become a writer and we do live in the country, sort of. We're also both veterans, which is why so many of my books have had military stuff in them. Gritty, not grimdark.

[@tobybartels8426]

Congratulations! This isn't really what I expect when I hear of an arranged marriage or a matchmaker, but hiring someone to tell you who to date does sound like it could be a good idea.

[@taylor_green_9]

This sounds like the plot of an exceptionally cool Hallmark movie. I'd watch it!

[@LimegreenSnowstorm]

This is adorable and wholesome and wonderdul

[@swiftieslytherin11]

This is one of the sweetest, most wholesome love stories I've ever heard! I'm so glad you guys are happy together! ❤

[@MirkwoodElfAdventures]

Awww. So happy for you! I met my Legolas volunteering at an animal sanctuary. I was in a loveless harmful relationship and I ended up with the elf of my dreams, now we live in the wild writing novels and cosplaying together ❤😊

[@alpaga4820]

OMG that was so entertaining from beginning to end no wonder you have inspiration to write novels 😂

[@goddessofmintaka]

My husband's and my full story is much too long for a simple comment, but we also "met" twice. 😂 I'm glad it worked out for you!

[@emmalaitinen4337]

Awe that is such a cute story 😊. Congratulations

[@hopehowell4338]

That's some fun. I new my husband was going to be the one when he book me a book on a date instead of flowers.

[@LostPeopleOfEarth158]

I met my husband through my best friend in high school. They were in woodworking shop together and she sat with him and his friends at lunch and I sat with her. It was a rocky start. My husband was and still is a smart alec with a twisted sense of humor. I said I had a little sister and he made some offhanded joke and I threatened to kill him if he went near her. Then I married him four years later. Been together for ten years and married eight.

[@johnmrke2786]

I only recently found your channel and it is golden. lol

[@johannageisel5390]

Nice. I knew there would be a D20 in the box! However, meeting a guy named Christian at a house church is a little bit on the nose. The author should change that plot point. 😛

[@princecharon]

Good for you, may you have a long and happy marriage.

[@mosasaurusrex1815]

I didnt understand how this worked out until D&D got involved. Then the dice? I would absolutely fall for that.

[@wordsofwinter]

I got a dating coach and that's how I met my husband! Hilariously, he is a DM for D&D and taught me to play

[@poonyaTara]

Warning! ‼️ It's kind of normal to fall out of love briefly at the two year mark. Ironically this is because of a mistaken sense of loyalty toward the person our spouse was on our wedding day. That person has developed since then and become a slightly better version of self ... that might not fit as well with whom we've become. Once you let go of expecting to get to love that dated version of your spouse you will get to become acquainted with and love the person your spouse has become--as long as you don't do something stupid like divorce over it or have an affair in the meantime. That's why marriage is for adults--you've got to be okay with being on your own while you get reacquainted and re-enamored. Best wishes!!!

[@kris_pang]

This is literally fanfiction asdfghjkl

[@Yggdrasilincarnate]

I laughed out loud at the reveal that there was a D20 in the box. That was perfect 😂

[@OnlyReputation]

I was waiting for you say “that’s the plot of so and so book.” That’s so cute! Good for you!

[@bonnie_rose]

OMG-Me too!! I used a matchmaker, and it was the best money I ever spent!

[@westower7898]

That is wild. THank you for sharing. That is great.

[@vilevagrant4632]

"The Woman DMs!" Slams the ground with his fist. "It should have been me not him!" 😂

[@its1am]

omg first i love your vids and ur writing is amazing

[@gmofkings]

That fact dnd was the thing that made it really start is amazing.

[@Luciferkragoth]

Adorable. I'm stealing the D20 thing.

[@cmm5542]

I think you two are adorable and inspiring. I hope someday I have a'story like this to tell! 😊 (As I don't think the whole knife-to-throat meet-cute is in the cards for me at this point . . .)

[@Ruthavecflute]

Im now imagining a ring where the 'stone' is a miniature D20

[@LiviKittyCutie]

This is literally so cute, and I don’t think anything is wrong with an arranged relationship/marriage as long as both parties sign up for it. Plus, through arranged marriages you’ll never have to question how serious the other person actually wants to get. 😅

[@elaniarkady7351]

Omg congratulations!!! That's beautiful.

[@RustBrand777]

Interesting. It has me intrigued as to what you value as a person🤔I mean that curiously, not judgingly. Perhaps I should give that book of yours a read

[@alexandrebelinge8996]

I want a picture of his face when you put that velvet box on the table !

[@CheaterSama]

The Dice in the ringtone was perfect! XD Love it so much!

[@steakismeat177]

Honestly you’re so lucky! I try going to bars to find someone but I’m too anxious and shy and every girl I see is probably not interested in me and I just wanna leave, cuddle my pillow and cry. I looked at the dating service you used since we’re in the same state but the men’s 1822 Facebook group screamed religious patriarchal cult to me

[@Gabriel-Siqueira]

Man, that's the craziest story I ever heard! I'm still trying to believe it.

[@c.lstrife2829]

The dice of destiny has spoken. 😂 but honestly that was sweet and i would like to hear his side now because of that exchange 😂.

[@avrilfan0521]

Cant tell if this is literal or just your storytelling style but either way its adorable.

[@aeronprosek7963]

IT'S A TRUE STORY?! I thought for sure you were summarizing a contemporary novel you'd read! What the--HOW?

[@sardonisms]

I didn't date my boyfriend through D&D but I did meet him by playtesting his game. It took a lot more "coincidences that sometimes give me an existential crisis thinking about how we almost didn't meet in a hundred ways" than "arranged/set up by a matchmaker", though.

[@randomobserver8168]

Interesting- when I hear the term arranged marriage I think of quite traditional, parent and extended family type spouse searches, but of course even they often made use of traditional matchmakers and the modern apparatus of matchmakers, dating services, dating coaches, or even websites does have many points of contact and clearly IS in the same tradition, just adapted to the times and the methods we have. Thanks for sharing your story.

[@NarutoBaby94]

This is making me look forward to when I can afford to hire a matchmaker

[@thejurijo9388]

Ok that was really cute but not really an arranged marriage. My marriage was arranged. My parents found his profile on a matrimony site and showed it to me. I had no real interest in marriage at that time but I agreed he seemed compatible. Now my parents had been sending likes to many profiles but his was the only one that I personally had selected. I had not directly interacted with any of the guys so far. His older brother contacted my parents and said they were interested and asked for my number. My parents told me about this development and asked me if it was okay. I wasn't really sure about this as I am shy and have trouble with phone conversations. But with my parents encouragement I agreed. We started talking, he came to see me once, and we were married before the end of the year. We've been married for three years now and have a son. We are quite happy. In my culture this is the norm. It's actually strange to think of doing these things on your own.

[@claytonwheatley8773]

D&D is a great matchmaking tool!

[@Bubblemaster3000-uh8oe]

This is the only irl love story I believe in anymore

[@Faye-el1bz]

I've no idea who your publisher is and wondered if you have approached QBD books I find your humour hilarious

[@TamarKnochel]

Oh my goodness! That's the best story ever! ❤

[@kasterborouskitten]

I feel like you would love Drinking Song For The Socially Anxious, it's a really cute song about two people who meet and connect through D&D 💖 It's by The Amazing Devil (a band with Joey Batey aka Jaskier from The Witcher), their music and lyrics are so beautifully written: otherworldly and ethereal yet raw and cathartic 🎶

[@ashleyscozybookcorner5577]

This is a really cute story I love it, nerd on!!!

[@makaylapaige8388]

Awww this is such a cute and amazin story, also do you have any recommendations for a D&D campaign for player of a few months that are still gettin comfortable with the game

[@ninaschust3694]

European here. What does a typical house church look like?

[@secretbutterfly]

American from California here and I'm not sure either and would love to learn as well

[@j.g.3453]

​@@secretbutterflyformer Californian here, also, and I'm not quite sure either, but it kind of sounds like how the church I grew up in was founded. It started out as a bunch of retirees getting together in one of their living rooms for Bible study and communion and such, and they wound up with enough people and pooled tithes and offerings to buy an empty lot, build a church, and request/hire a pastor. My parents were the youngest peiple there when they joined, back in '83. I was 3 months old, and wound up partially raised by a couple dozen church grandparents.

[@secretbutterfly]

@@j.g.3453 Aw, that sounds lovely! Thanks for giving your perspective. I wondered if that might be what she's getting at as well.

[@ninaschust3694]

@@j.g.3453 sounds lovely. As long as it wasn't James Jones 😳😅😉

[@AntiquatedPixels]

This is a beautiful story!

[@sunglory4488]

That is the loveliest thing^^ Oh my~❤

[@JemicaM]

I had to send this to my friend who tried (and failed) multiple times to set me up with her friend Drew, until one day I accidentally came to their D&D campaign...

[@ambrosiarevolt-may8996]

My grandparents had an arrangement marriage/meeting. Her uncles were in business with his dad. The families arranged a bonfire meeting and they got married a few months later.

[@chanceusealeena7952]

My sister and all my czns are arranged marriage and are engaged like at least 2years, then marriage will come, so they woukd be very excited too about a male that is going to be there husband, mostly are happy now ofc and yeah first man in there life too so It like all those arranged marriage trope books

[@christopherlyons5900]

This is utterly fascinating. Hardly the same thing as the old-school arranged marriage where you are going to marry this guy, and nobody cares what you think of him. It seems quite viable to me. When it's a choice both people can make. Not what happened to me, though. And I truly truly suck at dating. Btw--Christian? Really? Are you sure you're not a character in a romance novel? How would you know if you were? Anyway, love your videos. The romance genre, maybe not quite so much. Romance in fiction, I adore. When it's done right. And in real life. When it's done right. In both cases, I tend to think it's more often done wrong, but never mind. Nothing in this world gets done right all of the time.

[@PunkinHead0119]

Proposed with a dice. Nice!

[@TadeuszCantwell]

You mean he's not a vampire you ran over in the middle of the night?

[@MorgaineRiddlePrince]

Cinderella was an "arranged" situation from the princes' side. Jasmin was, to a degree, an "arranged" one as well. What Jafar did was "forced". Making him the villain.

[@jeremybriggs4981]

purr purr meow your a smoke show so happy you got your man!

[@m__6930]

I think more people could use a match maker tbh

[@Negative1Point]

Aw, that's a really sweet story

[@Dr.Odd417]

I met my fiance through a matchmaker. We're getting married in about 2 weeks actually! Arranged Marriage isn't that bad if done correctly

[@JillianPlomin]

That’s too cute. A true romance!

[@comfortcrossroads]

Just found this video and it's so sweet!!! I'm so happy for the both of you!! :) I've always wanted an "arranged" marriage/relationship so I know my family has already vetted them, but my siblings and parents don't know anyone.

[@gray_mara]

I have several friends who had an arranged marriage. Their families discussed it, the last step was girl meets boy. Even at that stage, in Afghanistan, she had the opportunity to say no. She liked her prospective partner very much, so they married. The others are Indian and their stories are much the same.

[@wherami]

Adorable story

[@E_J_Works]

The title is misleading, feels like you did the velvet ring box gag on your viewers.

[@kristenhlady4079]

Thats so adorable 😊

[@zalphinian]

I'm a married woman, but honestly if I ever became single I think I'd prefer using a match maker over using dating websites. The men on those websites are toxic, and I won't really care to weed through the toxicity to find the decent and good ones.

[@geektesse]

I don't think there's anything against an arranged marriage, if both people agree to it. What's only cute in books is the "forced arranged marriage" trope, but in the novels both people are hot for each other and fall in love anyway so it's ok. Why shouldn't you be happy with another person that has been carefully selected and vouched for by a person you trust? I met my husband through some form of speed dating (face to face dating, for anyone German interested), and I was hopelessly attracted to him from the moment I met him. We'll have our 10th anniversary next year.

[@Aizen0sama]

Better love story than twilight

[@erincosta565]

That's adorable!

[@lynndragon2536]

People get all ick about arranged marriages but there are wonderful ones as long as full knowledge is involved

[@SmeiskAudio]

That's a fun story!

[@kaylajames3098]

Well, I am sold.

[@libraryphoenix]

You guys are adorable.

[@RK-fz7qc]

I met my husband through my mom’s good friend who was friends with my mil’s good friend. The conspired together to get us together 😝

[@MinaVanBerh]

Genuine European question here: Could someone please explain me what a house church is? 😮

[@hkol0730]

It doesn't matter how you meet as long as no one is forced into marriage.

[@gabriellagonzalez1149]

I love that!