Feeling Like A Burden To Others / Squirmy and Grubs

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Shane details yet another disturbing dream.
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Shane Burcaw (he/him) is the author of several award-winning books about disability. He is the President of a nonprofit organization called Laughing At My Nightmare, and a renowned public speaker who has performed across the country at places such as Harvard University, The University of Florida, The University of Connecticut, Princeton University, and many more.
Hannah Burcaw (she/her) graduated from Carleton College, where she studied Sociology and Anthropology. She films and edits the “Squirmy and Grubs” vlog, which has over 800,000 subscribers on KZbin. Hannah has spoken at prestigious universities and Fortune 500 companies alike about the realities of ableism. On her popular Instagram account, she advocates for acceptance of all people and works to improve the way society thinks about disability.
Shane and Hannah have been together for over four years. They got married in September of 2020 in the midst of a global pandemic in their backyard, with their officiant conducting the ceremony via Zoom. Their interabled relationship often confuses people, because much of society still cannot fathom people with disabilities being involved in loving, intimate relationships. Anyone who watches these episodes will quickly see their relationship is just as “normal” as any other. Sure, Hannah helps Shane use the bathroom and brush his teeth, but those activities do not detract from the emotional, intellectual, and physical connection they experience together.

[@kw03648]

I could sit and listen to Shane tell stories all day...he is so funny

[@divahc1]

I understand the feeling of being a burden, Shane. I have fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, chronic migraine, gastroparesis nocturnal, restless legs, nocturnal tooth grinding and more. There have been times when I've cried and told my mum (I live with her) how I feel like such a burden. She always says she'd rather have me this way, than not at all. She's 83, and cooks all our meals, and does all the washing and ironing. I'm 60. It's very hard.

[@KatieSmithND]

Hey! I had chronic migraines and saw Dr. John Stracks in Chicago. I think he and the curable app help people with all these conditions based on the work of Dr John Sarno. Dr Stracks does video appts. I think all these resources are worth looking up. Best of luck and I’m sorry you’re dealing with this!

[@divahc1]

@@KatieSmithND thanks so much! I'll look him up. I'm in Australia but it may be possible via video. Thanks for caring.

[@redsteddi]

🤗😭awwww so sorry

[@divahc1]

@@redsteddi thank you.x

[@redsteddi]

@@divahc1 bless you and your mom .. I will pray for you,🙏😊 pain is no joke... I turned 70 and have been off work since August with my knee ... and was going to PT for 5 months doing good and I fell and fractured nose and busted my lip😯....long story short I now had to start PT all over again 😩 like from the beginning.... but I will succeed again 💕👍

[@MeeblesSporella]

I would love to seen Shane do stand up comedy! He's hysterical!

[@blumberg1982]

He really is

[@marianneharms5836]

But I feel like he’d need Hannah there with her “Nopes”! 🤣

[@Dudeonwheels]

Only problem is he'd have trouble with the standing up part.

[@unapologeticallyamy9031]

I’d love to see him at an open mic night.

[@anniedetroit7525]

@@lindasullivan2780 I was waiting for this insensitive ridiculous comment. Do better.

[@michelelong3205]

That's a true nightmare that I can relate to. My husband is my caregiver and I'm always feeling like such a burden on him. He gets so upset when I express that out loud. I know in real life that Hannah and your parents have never considered you to be a burden to them, Shane. I have to remember that about myself , too, and remember to do like you do and laugh at my nightmare! Thanks for sharing! Hugs from West Texas!

[@ElizabethDohertyThomas]

Hub and I have felt that way about the other. One possible idea to be able to articulate to the other how much we love them (and some details on why they are lovable) and how our identity is central to the role we play helping the other. It's exhausting to need others though. I seem to be taking the full body circuit of totally incapacitated with very different limits over time, on top of chronic limitations.

[@michelelong3205]

@@ElizabethDohertyThomas 🙏

[@LolaElenaDisco]

@@susanne5803 wow this is excellent advice!!!!! Thank you for sharing!!

[@michelelong3205]

@@susanne5803 Thanks! I needed that!

[@PsychedelicSmurf]

@@susanne5803 Thank you for this comment; it is very important. I hope you are able to take moments for yourself as well as do so much caring for others.

[@TheJeffrey575]

Don’t forget to squeeze the gel back in place in Shane’s wheelchair cushion! See, we pay attention. ❤️👍🏻

[@odonovan]

@TheJeffrey575, after a story like that, Hannah might need to squeeze the gel back into place in Shane's headrest. 😂 🤣 😂 🤣 😂

[@mosaicgirl4002]

@@odonovan 😂😂😂❤️🤗

[@lisajean228]

Still can’t believe that nobody told him he had to redistribute the gel periodically! Very surprised he didn’t get sores sooner!

[@COTU9]

I think this should have been phrased "Make sure to squeeze Shanne's gel pack, like really work it around."

[@Markpattoned]

Hannah has such a nice kind personality and her voice is very soothing.

[@rondaherriott]

Is the intro Hannah being a “wheelchair digger”!? I’ve cracked it! She’s using him for SNACKS!!! 😂

[@collfoxley2658]

Too funny! 😂

[@quicksilvertears921]

It is all clear now. 😆

[@otakuwheels3099]

lol 😆

[@melissawhite9047]

Yesssss lol 🤣

[@catchyname5403]

Say crack again

[@brendablake584]

Your channel is the only channel that I will listen through the introduction: your "'welcome to the show...."- I think it is so cute and well done!

[@odonovan]

"Then I woke up, full of energy for the day." I actually hiccupped a bit when I laughed, because I had been in the middle of inhaling. The look on Shane's face did it. Just another day in the life, for Shane. I could imagine Shane saying, "and then," and continuing on with his next story, without missing a beat...one about being on safari and being devoured by a pride of lions or something. 😁

[@guessxwhoxthisxis]

I LOVEEEEEE hearing peoples dreams. I loved telling my dreams, but I don't remember them much anymore and people don't seem to enjoy it as much as I do

[@anniebertolini724]

I wonder how Ed Sheren feels about being the one whose music send everyone to sleep-positive and negative???

[@nancyf1531]

OMG... what a dream! Sorry I didn't cry but I did LOL when the fan, in your dream, came up and said, "I hope you don't die".

[@SouthernScratchin]

First time I have commented on one of yalls videos but I had to!! I became suddenly ill 10 years ago and went from Working Sr Mngt, PTA Board, ran the whole house Type A to pretty much unable to do anything or leave our house. My husband went from not knowing how much bills were to having to do it all. BURDEN CITY!!! It still crashes down on me some days. But, after watching y'all for a long time, among others, and my husband pushing me...I started a Channel in Sept with the only goal of making one person smile each video. 7 months and A whole bunch of Videos later led to an incredibly emotional video yesterday. 😁 The Channel was started to Save ME. But I have gotten so many messages since we started that I saved someone else. In Awe

[@randikinton7018]

Shane , You are not a burden to anyone.Never were never will be. Tell your nightmares to stop that and dream instead of all the love Hannah has for you. Or your loving fans. You are super loved!

[@MK-gy1ug]

@ Randi Kinto Easy for you to say when Your not carrying him, bathing him, changing him, feeding him, dressing him and the list goes on.

[@randikinton7018]

@@MK-gy1ug You don’t know anything about me. My boyfriend of 10 years was in a wheelchair when I met him. We lived together in my house until his death, through surgeries, more and more disabilities and would have married him ,but I would have been responsible for his medical debt. I Did EVERYTHING that Hannah does plus . He was not a burden to me and Shane is not a burden to Hannah.

[@MK-gy1ug]

@ Randi Kinton One can still love and take care of a handicapped individual and still feel burdened. That’s not a crime to feel like this. It’s being human.

[@jzargo6359]

@@bcathensga32 You realize she CHOSE this? She loves him and doesn’t think that he’s a burden, she literally said it herself. Stop being an asshole

[@EmilyLadau0729]

Just here to say I wanna know what Hannah’s snacks end up being! (And also that I very much relate to the unresolved burden issues, and am grateful for Shane sharing that.)

[@aprilschaefer5662]

I watch alot of your stuff and i can only imagine how proud your parents are of you guys. You dont let anyone or anything get in the way of your love for eachother. You have really opened my eyes to the lack of accomidation the world has for handicap people. it is nice to be able to see it though a different perspective. When you dont have a handicap you dont pay attention to be honest. Again thank you for sharing your lifes journey. I do wish you the best

[@lizpitt4895]

$50 worth of snacks haul please and thank youuu

[@wrapped_upinbooks]

Please do a video of Hannah opening her box of snacks!

[@fzzypurpleturtle]

I am invested in finding out what snacks she ordered !

[@chuckoneill2023]

Fifty bucks worth of Moon Pies. A marshmallow squished between two cookies and dipped in frosting. It's Red Neck superfood.

[@kathylynch9732]

My children got me Storyworth for Christmas!

[@mindyvaughn8217]

Oh Shane, I’m so sorry you have such bad nightmares. I do too and they always surround me not being good enough. They are always filled with me letting someone down and anxiety over it. I wish I had a brilliant answer to our nightmares. You are such a great writer you could do a book about dreams and what you think they mean that might be very helpful to people who have the same issues. Take care off each other.💖

[@kaylabruner1045]

I was getting a pedicure today (fully vaccinated) and the tech mentioned her niece having SMA. I told her all about your channel!! Hopefully you will be a great help to her & her mom! :)

[@bobryant9923]

Lol!!! Fully vaccinated... Do you see how you're conditioned by narratives of certain groups to make sure people know that you're vaccinated just because you left your home? Don't give in to people shaming you for living. In Florida, we barely wear masks, live free, and are doing great statistically. Protect the elderly but live without guilt.

[@kaylabruner1045]

​@@bobryant9923 it's polite, just so people know I'm not like you, endangering other people, and especially people who are disabled/immunocompromised :)

[@bobryant9923]

@@kaylabruner1045 lol! First off, you speak of disabled, I'm crippled. I'm a quadriplegic. If anybody's compromised, I am compromised as my breathing is affected due to my injury. Secondly, you say that it's polite. Did you ever feel compelled to tell people that you've got a flu shot or that you've got other shots prior to this? No. However, this virus is beat by more than 99% of people that get infected yet, you feel compelled to express that you've been vaccinated. And more importantly, how is it polite to tell people in a comment that you went somewhere and you're fully vaccinated? No one in the comment section is around you so politeness goes right out of the window as you can't infect anybody online. You've been brainwashed..

[@MK-gy1ug]

@ Kayla Bruner I’m not vaccinated and don’t plan to.What’s your point?

[@zen_mindset1]

What does being fully vaccinated have to do with a pedicure, even though I am also vaccinated.

[@tinabell947]

Wow what a dream, excited to see Hannah's $50 worth or snacks 😀 lol

[@beebee7538]

Shane talking about his dreams: “mine are like I descended into the depths of hell” Omg lol 😂

[@amyboitz717]

Omg for real. I was dying as he was telling the dream. 😭🤣🙏🙌🤭

[@anandshakti1]

I love that you seemed to take it seriously and plan to investigate it - I do that all the time and it works to bring me more joy. thanks for sharing.

[@jh5608]

I usually watch this YT channel “squirmy and grubs” to fall right asleep each night. Omg you’ll go right to sleep from them ;) - JK. You both are funny and great.

[@brucefinney4575]

I hope you don’t die either, Shane. I read one of your books - the one with the van to Florida then up the east coast for meet and greets. You guys are great. Hanna, you are a peach!

[@jasonbedford4564]

You guys are so awesome. I absolutely love how open and honest you are, even when delivered with Shane's crazy humor. You guys are so blessed to have found each other. Keep the great content coming. One of my top 5 favorite KZbin channels.

[@blindthief]

It just comes with the territory when you're disabled. I do most things myself but there are times when I feel like I'm slowing others down because of the fact that I need to travel everywhere with my wheelchair. But it's not a big deal at all because my friends and family love to help. In fact, they have friends who are abled body and are a real burden due to behavioral issues and other problems.

[@ZachSolie]

Wheelchair Digger cashing in on the snacks!

[@vnette9777]

Lol!

[@dena5558]

Omg 🤣

[@haaaleyyyyable]

"dreams knocking on my forehead telling me to dig deeper" is my next tattoo

[@mollyjackson4514]

Same sis. Same.

[@berthaholley5334]

Shane have a way of telling a story in a humorous way. He can keep a person laughing with love.❤️

[@karenkane3220]

At first I did not realize you were talking about a dream. Thought it really happened. So funny!

[@hotfootDDD]

Being with someone you can't stand is a burden. Caring for someone you love and respect is never a burden. You two are so obviously perfect for each other it's just inspiring!

[@robertwoodward8306]

I never remember my dreams I hope Shane has a peaceful night sleep tonight.

[@nana_L]

I found your channel recently and so glad I did. I binged watched this weekend. You two compliment one another. Love your sense of humor.

[@samb906]

I have those kind of dreams/nightmares. Usually the bad part seems very unrealistic but it has a real fear in there that I can face and be better prepared for.

[@lorimaeder1245]

Just in case that was just an underlining of self conscious, NEVER feel like your a burden, you are always loved by your family and friends. We can endure a lot for our loved ones. We cherish any time we can be with them regardless of the surrounding circumstances . Love to you and Hannah🥰💕

[@JamaicanRain]

Something tells me he read a few comments from some story tellers...

[@poeticposturing3850]

That is hysterical! Love the straight face delivery. FUNNY!

[@michelelong3205]

I know! Shane has perfect delivery!

[@pamelajackson9995]

What makes my day is that you all enjoy each other so much. And you find him funny!! (He is!)

[@kathyk479]

How can anyone cry when Hannah is laughing in the background! Lol.

[@melissamoskaluk3159]

My siblings and I got Storyworth for my mom last Mother’s Day. Best thing ever!!! We picked our own questions for her, and learned so much about her life. It spurred her on to create a cookbook with all our favourite recipes. Highly recommend! Great video you guys! Much love from northern British Columbia, Canada 🇨🇦💜

[@camerongrimes715]

I am also disabled and feel this way from time to time, I'm sure most disabled people experience this. Thanks for sharing!

[@pattijohnson8197]

I'm sorry but I laughed way toooooo hard about this. I hope you don't die, Shane! You AND HANNAH bring so much joy to so many people AND CHLOE.

[@ghostsof6tharmy644]

At least hannah won't have to pretend anymore if he dies.

[@pattijohnson8197]

@@ghostsof6tharmy644 I pray that you will one day be as happy as they are.

[@ghostsof6tharmy644]

@@pattijohnson8197 I pray good hearted people like you won't fall prey to con artists like these two. Hopefully you dont send em money

[@leecousins5440]

You are frickin hilarious Shane, mad my day, laying in bed with two busted ribs laughing so much it bloody hurts, eldest daughter thinks I’m crying in pain and comes to console me and I’m trying not to belly laugh. Love you two ♥️

[@jykirachanelle2599]

😍😍hannah loves shane's sense of humor, I know we all wish we had someone with that energy

[@hollyhock3945]

They do say that most comedians are really hurting or depressed on the inside and comedy is their coping mechanism. Evidently Shane couldn't hide his pain any longer and just needed to bare his soul. 😜

[@maryhelen1011]

Lol, I'm literally laughing and my kids ask if I'm okay, lol. Love you both and Chloe too!

[@jackschissler255]

Wheelchair Digger is using him for Snacks now. Oh Boy 😂

[@j.b.2435]

I love you guys so much! Shane you always brighten my day with your sense of humor. What a beautiful young couple.

[@julialucas1482]

Shane, you are a comedian. All you have to do is to take the funny bits that you shared along the way and make a Shane Burcaw comedy special. I even found the story of your fall from the ramp was funny but I would say more 'guarded funny'. To be honest, you are more real than most human beings on this planet for the simple reason that you are full of love, caring, and kindness. You are never a burden but someone that lifts others. Love this channel!!

[@trendylosercat]

hannah’s about to go all out and buy some fancy name brand snacks! christmas came early! loll

[@remotelylucy]

this is my favorite video in the last month they posted. he's back to his funny ways

[@Jsatchel2010]

When Shane was telling his dream I was watching the room swaying around behind him, and it could have been a ship. We just had an earthquake here in Japan so I am used to it.

[@kimapalibee3173]

when shane said "its a beautiful day," I thought he was gonna break out in a new song!!!! lol

[@sluggibammy]

i am writing this, straight up violently laughing but also choking. i cant dude. you are potentially one of the funniest people I've ever seen. im not just saying that, hilarious.

[@mollyjackson4514]

Love this sponcreship. I miss my mom so much, I lost her unexpectedly last year on Easter. Everyone should use this.

[@joycependleton589]

You two are so funny! Love how you compliment each other.💞

[@tammygill8679]

i just saw you guys in your wedding attire on Happy Land. It was under the post "Most Wholesome Couples". The line underneath said I married my best friend today. Awe.... I remember that picture!

[@cerseilannister2983]

My mom passed away recently. She would have loved to do story worth. She was into genealogies and telling stories and writing. I wish I would have known about it before. If you know anyone who would like Storyworth. Don’t wait.

[@sweingold5686]

I am a big fan of this channel. I admire their mission and just love all their videos. I have all of Shane's books, plus his dad's book. Then I got the Bluenose Box. I've been enjoying Grub's coffee. Next will be Squirmy's tea.

[@JamaicanRain]

Whoa. Glad you found yourself the perfect channel! That is a very difficult prospect for some people!🤪

[@juliamullaney6599]

Hello!💗 So🙏i have been following you guys for a while! I am In awe of you🌻 sending you love, blessings and huge hugs❣️💞❤️

[@kristinaarp9144]

The two of you doing a comedy show together would be hysterical. Also, Hannah needs to wear a shirt that says Wheelchair Digger during your routine. 😂😂😂😂

[@irisklein7027]

I was hoping the title was a joke! Relieved it was just a dream! You should never feel like a burden, you are making this world a better place!

[@oliviar.4416]

"I hope you don't die" was really the icing on the cake 🤣

[@kscheuerman5378]

Ah, it's over, you had me wanting more...... Wow, such details in your dreams. Sometimes my dreams are vague & sometimes they aren't. I always hate my dreams, they always make me feel, feelings I don't like! You know, I made a mistake, I stole something, I told someone off that didn't deserve it at all etc, etc. Thanks for sharing

[@rachelcastaneda1381]

I feel that way too - like I’m a burden to my husband because I’m always in pain with cervical spondiolytis, lumbar spondiolytis, chronic migraines, osteoarthritis. So I do t have your condition but I have my own issues and I constantly feel like I am a burden to my husband. He assures me that I am not. I love him. 💙💙

[@karenfonseca5592]

Shane you are amazing and such a fun guy!!

[@MountainPearls]

I’m so glad you did this. I have an “invisible” ans “but you don’t look sick” disability (Migraines a s often feel that way. My boyfriend (soon to move to otherwise I believe) is so amazing. But my family...they try but they just don’t get it. They don’t get it at all. It is very frustrating. I’m on the car (NOT DRIVING) but I am looking forward to watching this!

[@cynthiadeere7599]

Thanks for the info about Storyworth! I am in contact with them to understand how it will work for my family. It is a great idea!

[@allisontaylor1818]

I miss you guys when I don't see your videos for a few days ...just like family..

[@fernandochavez4312]

That was a hilarious dream. A burden is something we tow behind, a weight. You sir are a trailblazer, a bridge builder. You lift up not weight down.

[@irenedavo3768]

😊

[@amandaengland7765]

Oh my goodness I'm literally "laughing at your nightmare". 😂 Thanks for sharing!

[@didisalyers4460]

This was so funny, because Shane could totally do comedy. This is part of why I watch your videos> you both play off each other and it makes your videos so enjoyable.

[@JennyStone]

😂 Enjoy your treats! Hahaha! 😅

[@dune3662]

Just saw your documentary on KZbin and I had to see how you guys were doing now! I hope all is well. Congrats on the marriage❤️ I’d love to know what marriage advice you guys have for newlyweds.

[@youtubetrucker6463]

Laughter can be a fear response so crying could be a love response ♥️

[@hilaryc3203]

There was a mad lawnmower man in my neighbourhood for awhile. I am in a condo, but there is a subdivision across the street. The guy started to mow his lawn at midnight. Week in, week out, mowing at midnight. Then he took out his chainsaw to trim trees - midnight or later. We have a noise ordinance so I complained to the City, along with half the building and they sent a warning to his landlord. In retaliation, he started to walk up and down the street threatening the building occupants with the chainsaw. City told the landlord, evict him or face huge fines. He was evicted of course, but what a lunatic.

[@merlebrown1565]

Shane! Stand-up! Get It? Love you both!

[@janine9115]

Love how seriously you two take your snacks! Shane's story might not have been funny in the dream but the retelling was hilarious.

[@peteferguson7024]

Think about how the comedian tells that story... assuming of course that he had the same dream😁 So I set this cool cat, shane, up with a packed house. Everyone's excited to hear more of his wicked humor, I hand it off to him, and before you know it, he has them all in tears... no... real tears....

[@rainnaprice5976]

You should never feel like you are a burden ! If you have people around you supporting you they are giving you a part of themselves because they love and care about you ! And they want to be there ! I pray god lifts this feeling from your heart and you are blessed with nothing but reassurance and peace .

[@bobryant9923]

C4-C5 quad... Every time I dream, the dreams are always different scenarios but throughout the dreams, I explain to people that my hands don't have dexterity and I can't walk... As I walk around using my hands. Lol.

[@rogerepp9847]

Shane: “I had never done ‘STAND up comedy before.” Me: (laughing hysterically out of my chair!!!!)

[@atc35012]

I find your voices soothing. Makes me sleepy.

[@lisas8244]

Shane, it is important for you to realize that we all need help from others in one way or another and you're no different. The people who help us care about and love us so it is rewarding for them to be of value to us and to feel needed. You are not a burden to anyone who loves you so chase those nightmares out of your head.

[@johnfennell5187]

Hi from Ireland, my wife Annie and I thought at first you Hannah had alternative motives for being with Shane, but after watching and now being a subscriber, we both see how genuine you both are, how much you love each other, hopefully those who seem to think it's ok to abuse you both , need to remove their blinkers and see the truth, and also what a great business couple you both are, again a big hi from Ireland and keep the video's coming, good luck and Godbless . Best regards John and Annie Fennell 👍🙏😃

[@Rel1369]

The thing with dreams is it is about how WE feel and not about how anyone else does. It is the mind making sense of the data inputs, it has no real way of 'knowing' and just guesses the missing bits. On some level Shane, you feel as though you were a burden to your family and there is a significant case for that. I feel it would be hard to accept the dedication your family had for you to get you to adulthood not only as a function but as a fantastic human that highly contributes to society and yes you are funny Shane.

[@shoshannafachima1306]

Whoa,crazy dreams,but dreams canbe very confusing and a mish-mash of emotions and feelings ect. ect. Wish8ng you positive and beautiful dreams Hugs and smiles to you and hannah🤗🤗

[@Rissa1111]

Have a great weekend. 💖

[@wendiruppe9468]

Such a sad dream, Shane! I wish you sweet, happy dreams tonight. Maybe Hannah can dream about which snacks she wants :)

[@awalkthroughtorah6897]

Maybe you should be invited to do stand up! Just don't open with that one!

[@BrittaniNP]

It was the part about the lady at the end of the dream, that had me cracking up. lol too funny!

[@rebekahethington4577]

I love your videos. Enjoying your sense of humor. I also love seeing Cloe, she is so adorable. I wish my Koda could meet Cloe lol.

[@jworth7203]

Our neighbor always mows his lawn twice in a row. At least twice a week. So delightful.

[@nancycowan6109]

I watch Nova Scotia Living if I wake up really early. Don’t get me wrong, I adore this channel. When I wake up at 4 or 5 am (common), this channel lulls me to sleep. Then I go back and watch it for real. Tracey does nice long episodes. She is also a rock star in her own right. Oh wait, this is something about dreams, I love my dreams. Sometimes disturbing, but mostly pretty great. Be well, you two. ❤️

[@dianegilchrist677]

I also feel such a burden to my husband even Though he has never made me feel that way! We have been together over 35 years .He is My heart & soul always forever & a day.❤️❤️ I just wanted to say love is what you make it. Whatever your circumstances. 🥰

[@michelelong3205]

I'm the same! In 28 years of marriage, not once has my husband made me feel like a burden to him. I do that to myself!😔

[@naturebythetamar8699]

I missed the part where Shane said it was a dream and still just believed every word! 😂

[@kayenome4942]

You two are so fun together. I love to watch all your videos.

[@ginnyzoo]

I dreamed my little sister pushed me down steep stairs then fed me bread with glass in it... no one listened to my crys for help. No one believed me... BECAUSE she is sweet and wouldn't hurt a fly! I was a bossy controlling older sister who got what was coming to her. I cleaned up my act after that, at least we remain best friends 50 years later!

[@eej1983able]

Wtf lolol. This comment had me burst out laughing 😅