Fentanyl Addict interview - Billy

Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of Billy, a fentanyl addict living on Skid Row.
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[@suezannemarie292]

He's been waiting his whole life to tell his story. Thank you Mark for listening 🙏 🙌 😊 💗

[@simplyme9016]

Yes...

[@skatercoaster4115]

👍🏼

[@krissykes513]

I despise that damn dismissive ass word....junkie...wth is wrong with people.

[@Zain_Passing_By]

That's not true

[@Lightgoldbridge]

We all listen …..blessings

[@lesterdewee5236]

Mark, what you’re doing is monumental to say the least. Bringing awareness to childhood trauma and letting these amazing individuals speak their peace is what the world needs. You’re helping so many people through your content whether it’s addicts facing similar situations or layman who get a chance to learn about the stories behind addiction. I am certain you have shifted the narrative for a lot of people from judgement to compassion and for that I can’t thank you enough.

[@lesterdewee5236]

@@Kells6895 this is just an appreciation post for Mark. I agree that there should be action but that’s for individuals to figure out on their own terms. Awareness starts the conversation which is what this channel promotes. Hope you have a great day.

[@lesterdewee5236]

@@fresatx I respect and appreciate your perspective. Have a great weekend man

[@lesterdewee5236]

@@fresatx I hear you man. If you have more information regarding the topic please share or maybe you can start your own channel to bring understanding to the concerns you mentioned. Everyone is allowed to think and feel however they like. I think Mark is amazing person and I respect if you think he isn’t. Let’s agree to disagree.

[@adriannedubins8793]

I cannot like this comment enough!! Agree. 😀

[@carolynrupard2699]

Lester, I agree. Most of my life I judged. I could never grip how they just couldn't quit, get a job or take care of their children. My degree and career has changed that. Mark has brought a deeper level of compassion, understanding and love to my life through SWU that I would never have learned in the classroom. Thank you Mark. Every day I am grateful because you; through your work, I am even more interested in human behavior and childhood trauma. I really believe your upbringing makes and drives us. want to do more for humankind. We only get out of this together. I really respect you Mark. I am always praying for you, your channel and all the ones you come in contact with. Your reward is more precious than gold.

[@mandymigut8200]

Don't give up billy u are worth it ..give ur self a chance u deserve it...

[@Jewels_8404]

I love that this man is honest with himself, he doesn’t seem to be in denial. My heart really goes out to him and I hope he can find recovery that sticks.

[@bthalsey5943]

He is a great human….. he just doesn’t know it….though he should….

[@fullthrottlemetric]

Are you kidding ? I could pick out a hundred half truths .. do you really think a educated professional cheerleader is gunna have a baby with a tattooed up homeless druggie? Nmmmhmmm

[@dallasoch]

​@@fullthrottlemetric I'm thinking that was way before the tattoos.... since like he was pretty young when he had his daughter. You'd be surprised

[@WilliamHorton-zp7nt]

Actually it's true. I wasn't always in this situation. When I'm clean I'm something special. Best believe it.

[@bashmeesh]

"The only thing that matters is relationships, and love. And time, we don't have enough." Beautiful.

[@criticalmass6249]

It is beautiful. I love a girl named Amanda and I wish she knew this.

[@criticalmass6249]

I’m hurting 💔

[@equalopportunitydestroyer]

money comes and goes....relationships the same...time however...that cannot be replaced...don't waste time...keep it pushing on some righteous shit

[@sharonvelasquez4456]

Wow, I am so humbled by this man's honesty. He was born with so many strikes against him, it's really heartbreaking. After everything he's been through he still says "my mom was a good person". The power of love is UNDENIABLE. May God give you the strength that only He has. You are so deserving of true happiness. Don't give up Billy🙏🙏🏾🙏🏿🙏🏻🙏🏽🙏🏼

[@tambourine36]

He sees the good in everyone. Reminds me of Johnny Depp and his relationship with his mom

[@bintbybint8431]

My heart breaks for this poor soul. My little brother died and people in general thought ‘junkie’ no one thought to describe him as a wonderful person. A kind, academic, witty, wonderful, hardworking young man. A devoted son, brother and uncle. Just a junkie. This channel is so important, it shows that people are more than their addiction, their job etc. Everyone has a story.

[@thebarefootfarm5919]

Thank you for this comment. I have 12 years sober. A beautiful home, 4 healthy kids and an amazing husband, business, college degree, ect....and no one in my church or the PTA would ever think I was a "junkie". I am very open and outspoken. We are human.... Sister, daughters, aunts and friends. No one says I want to grow up and be a junkie ya know? I tell people never judge..I was raised well in a good family and it still found me....

[@tambourine36]

Thanks for this. You are very kind. Compassionate. People can be so cruel if they haven't experienced this

[@icecrystal3255]

The part where, at 16, he thought of his mom while looking at the moon and then got a call about her being gone hurts. I think that is key to his life of pain. So sad😥 Hugs to him. Glad he has love in this cruel world.

[@parisa5014]

Intuition is wild, isn't it? The fact that anyone can deny the spiritual aspect of this life astounds me. Very powerful, that.

[@imalright2837]

@@parisa5014 it used to perplexed me too but I now realize some people just don’t have the wiring to sense it. Likely never will after a certain point in life.

[@parisa5014]

@@imalright2837 sometimes I'm convinced were surrounded by clones and drones LOL. I feel like there's like 10% of people on one wavelength and the rest are just.... Something else lol

[@libra11426]

She was saying goodbye before he got the call. 💛

[@icecrystal3255]

@@libra11426 indeed

[@TrishaB80]

You and I are the same age and I'm just now 2yrs clean! You still have time to do something different! Thank you for telling your story!

[@marylougeorge9890]

Congratulations on your sobriety. 😎😊👏💖

[@destytayzo77]

Definitely especially as a artist. Dude just needs real friends around him people who want to grow.

[@joannekerr3]

Billy you seem like a very kind hearted person. You deserve to be happy and healthy. You are worth so much more than you past, your mistakes and your trauma. You deserve to fight for yourself. Sending you my love and encouragement 💕

[@tedijune6759]

Dear joannekerr3: I resonate with your written comment here, and ❤ your profile pic. I’m a 661/2 year old female… I sussed to your chan. Here… I AM straight as can be now…I used to grow #beavercreekboogieweed ❤❤❤

[@joannekerr3]

@@tedijune6759 heya 👋 glad to meet you virtually 😁 Hope you have a blessed day

[@tambourine36]

You would be a wonderful sponsor or counsellor

[@flarethecharizard648]

Billy I have a similar experience about seeing the moon & your mother’s passing; I’ve never heard another person mention it. I feel such a connection to you. I’m rooting for you; please don’t give up. We care about you. Thanks again as always for what you do, Mark.

[@tambourine36]

The guy has so much love

[@torstrasburg8289]

Such a thoughtful, honest, humble person. And well-spoken. I'm rooting for him all the way.

[@AnalogProductions]

Billy is my friend and I love him. This breaks my heart. If you see this Billy, we love you man.

[@tambourine36]

I wish you could help him he seems like an awesome person

[@samanthacostido7823]

I hope they make a class in middle school or high school that shows your collection. To help showcase the possible future they could encounter if they choose drugs. Or save someone from sexual abuse.

[@marylougeorge9890]

The interviews could also help kids realize they're not as alone or odd as they think. Could help them open up.

[@samanthacostido7823]

@@marylougeorge9890 totally agree!

[@jasminemania2984]

Very good idea shawty

[@coweenuh453]

Totally agree!!! It would give youth the opportunity to open up about sexual abuse. Def think this is more high school content typically but still! VERY important

[@barneyronnie]

Sometimes the drug chooses the person ...

[@ginalapiana5015]

He never had a chance. Broken people having kids. It’s so heartbreaking 💔 I pray he finds his way and can have some peace ❤️

[@karenhenry2430]

I like him, he has a good heart, he's pretty intelligent, articulate too. Lovely, the way he talks about his girlfriend too, and his mother

[@sandibutler4877]

I would love a book with just the photos from this series. Videography is one thing but some of the still photos are amazingly heartwretchingly beautiful.

[@carolynrupard2699]

Mark, please do another book. I'd love one.

[@wendysaponaro3812]

YES!!! The stills are EPIC!

[@mscanadianbakin]

Yes

[@tambourine36]

Agreed

[@sandibutler4877]

And he did but $100 + is a little too much for me 😪

[@homebrewbuzz4481]

Under a different set of circumstances, this man would be highly successful

[@marylougeorge9890]

Absolutely. His success wouldn't have been a few years of his life. He would have been able to sustain it. Hopefully, that time will come again.

[@professionalreviews3061]

Those that are brutally honest with their past and situation have a better shot at making it. This guy laid it all on the line. The good the bad the ugly. I respect him for that.

[@cansee0]

Agree 100%

[@aprilmahurin5646]

That's the moment we become a survivor and no longer a victim

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@aprilmahurin5646 Well said.💖

[@thebarefootfarm5919]

WOW!!! Small world Billy. I'm from West Palm Beach, born and raised. A bunch of my family lives in Okeechobee. Your incredibly honest & humble and not boastful whatsoever. There is just something about you that has me really rooting for you. I've been sober from heroin for 12 years now....and I went to Gold Coast academy, because I couldn't handle John I Leonard anymore. I also lost my dad a couple years ago, who also struggled with alcohol and addiction most his life. By the grace of God I didn't relapse. I can feel your pain when you speak of your mom and do believe she is now at peace. I pray you can kick this habit brother. I'd be dead if I still used with this fentanyl around. I pray for your safety, healing and recovery. Im proof it can be done.

[@tambourine36]

Wish u guys could talk to each other

[@realdealguereca7944]

Mark, you take the most amazing portraits.

[@skalien51]

Like many here, I feel for this man. He’s not in denial & speaks from the heart. I pray he & his girlfriend find success away from the addiction. Thank you for sharing his story.

[@emmaleia13]

Billy is honest and clear about the life he leads. I think his mother did everything she could for her children but the drugs took over. He was born an addict and his childhood from home to home must have been very difficult to build. He says the main thing that almost all of these people on Skid Row lack is parental love. To love and feel loved. I wish Billy the best in life.

[@hgraham1836]

I agree

[@gailstanhope6262]

.n

[@duknfedz2359]

You can always tell the people who have never had a drug addict family member.. these people will lie so much they start to believe it.. 90% of what he’s saying is a complete lie he’s told so many times he actually believes it.. I hope nobody in your family becomes an addict because you are easy prey..

[@brekinruels9692]

@@hgraham1836 is

[@hgraham1836]

@@brekinruels9692 👌

[@leanneadams2549]

Poor guy. You can hear the emptiness!!! I wish I could do anything for him! Seems like he’s so so much more than this

[@tambourine36]

Definitely

[@centeguahan3760]

Thank you for this interview. His life lesson is a real one. When I suddenly lost my kid's mother about a year ago, I literally called everyone I loved deeply & told them how I felt. My family & closet friends. I laid it all out because I'm not one to say what's on my mind till I'm standing over their grave when it's already too late. Her passing was the hardest thing ever I have to cope with & tbh, I had a dream of us lastnight, I woke up bawling my eyes out & wrote it all down. Tell your loved ones you love them because really, time is unpredictable. Thank you again

[@seriveitz765]

“Love is the most powerful energy in the universe” 💜💪🏽

[@vanollsum]

Hate too...its a 50/50 thing...you choose...🤍🖤

[@carolynrupard2699]

I love their quotes. I've started adding them to sticky notes . I place them in my office.

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@carolynrupard2699 💖

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@vanollsum Love is stronger than hate. It's the key to freedom.

[@samanthapurdy2053]

I haven't even watched it yet but just from the first few seconds I have so much to say. My brother's name is Billy and we grew up in south Florida and we're born to addict/alcoholic parents. This man has definitely went through more than we have but it always amazes me how many people have similar experiences and we all turn out different. My brother and I have never touched drugs. I want better for my kids.

[@jillmartin232]

Dysfunction manifests itself differently from person to person. Sorry to hear about your childhood.

[@melissajones6]

Remember that addiction doesn’t have to just be about drugs. Not saying this is you but Many people think they are “safe” from addiction, or “better than” someone else because they don’t use drugs. But they’re quick to forget or won’t mention their soda addiction, or they smoke cigarettes, or drink alcohol, or shop obsessively, or gamble and/or buy scratch offs all the time. Or binge eat shit food without a second thought. Fact is, Addiction is genetic and we may think we’re safe but often we’ve just overlooked what we’re addicted too because of a false idea that it’s not an addiction because it’s “not drugs.”

[@tarajtee]

take it as a sign… and keep it up love

[@tambourine36]

Wish he had people to connect with to let him know he matters

[@verg4469_]

Mark you should do a compilation video over all the most important lessons people have learned. its always interesting to hear different peoples answers. i know that kinda breaks the format but i think it would be cool

[@melinaspath5482]

Wouldn't that be good only problem is most people sadly rather viewing the dark side so probably wouldn't get much viewing but I,d definitely watch it, great idea

[@SoftWhiteUnderbelly]

What I’ve thought would be interesting is to do a compilation of interviewees responses to my question “Have you ever been in love?”. 90% reply with “What?”.

[@melinaspath5482]

@@SoftWhiteUnderbelly yes broken people who have been through many a trauma can't grasp the concept, first question that comes to mind, what is love for them

[@amylchapman]

@@SoftWhiteUnderbelly that’s because you say it too fast and kinda mumble it, every time. I’m a psychologist so I have my thoughts on why you do that….

[@jennifercochrane8218]

@@amylchapman I'd have to disagree. There's lots of times where he's asked clearly..

[@catapillargirl2021]

“How was YOUR childhood?” He spent most of his answer defending his Mom for how he was raised. I wish he would advocate for himself just as hard. He deserves a great life. I hope things turn around for him. A 20+ year addiction i feel like time isn’t on his side.

[@tambourine36]

I hope he will be ok

[@johncoco2324]

I have known Billy for years now, honestly a genuine person, funny as hell and always has your back. I have seen him successful 1st hand and know he can do it again. Billy, love ya man, you can get your life back. I did and you can also. We seen a lot of our friends die in SoFlo, don't want anything to happen to you or your girl out there. Video was powerful, stay positive and i will ttys.

[@micheleturley8870]

Come on billy you can do it! I'm praying for you God bless you. Keep going!

[@DickHead-u8x]

Thank you

[@tambourine36]

Please reach out to him if you can

[@johncoco2324]

@@tambourine36 its impossible. He reaches out and disappears just as fast. Love this guy, known him for years, just praying he is ok. Hit me up if you see this Billy.

[@KarenAnne1965]

Tragedy never ends. What is the answer? We’re not allowed to interfere in peoples parenting and the system seems to eat kids alive when they do end up in it. kids are sacrificed over and over again. I don’t think it will ever change. I loved his compassion for his mother and her own childhood trauma. it’s probably not a good way to start the day watching these videos because sometimes I get really sad. Today is one of those days.

[@sunstruck]

all individuals must seek enlightenment no matter what background you come from

[@nicholasmcgreevy8313]

Our American culture does eat children alive.

[@icemaiden6000]

👌👌💯♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@stormy8427]

🤍

[@meaganreese9502]

Actually, I think that watching these videos is an amazing way to start the day. With each subject Marc choses, you can't not be sympathetic at least and down right shaken to your core most times! I think each person should meet a new day, feeling for others!

[@N-of-One]

I was so captivated by his story! Thank you Mark for giving everyone you interview the time and space to share their lives. They're not that different than all of us. It makes me realize how vulnerable life is but also how strong and resilient.

[@kaylaaicher3902]

Mark’s voice is so soothing. These interviews are helping me stay sane and grateful. I have almost 5 years sober. Thank you all who participate in my recovery.

[@tambourine36]

They help my anxiety I like watching real life

[@amandabeltran7241]

My heart breaks for him...I found my mom passed away it's still really hard so I feel your pain .. sending love to you all from BUFFALO NY 💋💪

[@koffinkat666]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. My last name is Beltran as well! I used to be addicted to heroin but got off it and saved my self. It was terrible and hard.

[@LuchadorMasque]

Finding dead bodies. That feeling. It never goes away. PTSD is the gift that keeps on giving . . . You nightmares.

[@boboddo36]

My mom passed suddenly and I found her. Just the worst thing. I’m also from Buffalo NY.

[@marylougeorge9890]

I can't imagine going through that. One of my sisters was in junior high when our dad died. She was with him. She called the dr who couldn't come because he was going to lunch. There was no 911 then. Another sister found my step dad in a wooded area where he'd committed suicide. The whole family had searched 3 days for him. Even hired a plane for the search. I don't know how my sisters have maintained. 💔

[@LuchadorMasque]

@@marylougeorge9890 jesus

[@barnabykent6698]

We're rooting for you Billy, we really are! To have been through all of that and still be here fighting another day, you've gotta have enormous strength.

[@AshleyExtremeCouponer]

He’s so intelligent and even toned. He’s so easy to listen to. Sure things could have been different for him

[@JonatanRonnlycke]

Can't listen or focus because he says "you know" in every sentence.

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@JonatanRonnlycke That's ok. His story is heartbreaking. It's difficult not crying while listening.💔

[@billythekid6898]

@@JonatanRonnlycke "ya know" lol

[@billythekid6898]

@@marylougeorge9890 thank you Mary Lou george for watching and listening to my story. Sorry about the "you knows"

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@billythekid6898 "you knows" never bothered me. I was trying to wake him up to what's important. Thank you for your response. I Sure do wish you well. Love from Michigan 💖

[@equalopportunitydestroyer]

childhood traumas...I've been thru them all too bro...grew up in Florida w addict parents and I landed in prison...and got out and did well for awhile...then slipped back into the pills and now I'm on suboxone...I work hard and take care of my family...but that self destructive streak is ever present...it makes no sense to be so happy and in turn make that choice to rip it all apart w my selfish ways...big love and respect outta Orlando Billy...and Mark...you're doing a good thing by letting these folks vent...we need it man...

[@tambourine36]

Nice comments. Wish there was a support group for everyone who cares and wants to support others

[@emilypriestley7662]

Billy seemed like a genuinely good person. He also came across as so intelligent. He was honest and it was clear how he ended up here when he is, born addicted. Billy I hope you continue to think of the positives and find small moments of joy in everyday because everyday is a gift. I loved your message at the end to tell all your people that you love them, I lost my brother to overdose in July and I know now how close to keep your loved ones. Keep telling them you love them. Billy you matter, try to enjoy the days you have as best you can.

[@Xtelahhh]

Thank you Mark for these interviews they are very eye opening and educational, it’s easy to look at a guy like him and Judge without knowing what hes truly been through. God bless him! 🙏🏻

[@marylougeorge9890]

Amen. Truth.

[@kAdams277]

He just uses honesty. I'm really impressed with him and also I feel sadness for him too. It just seems like hes experienced so much in this one life.

[@leneo1731]

Billy, I have so much respect for your honesty. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Intelligent people understand that we never can understand addiction. We're in no potition to say that I'd never do this or that. No one knows until they've been so sick that they've wiling to do everything to get well. Thank you for being open about these things, it's so important for people to know the horrible reality of addiction. Also, I'm so sorry that you were born out of two addicts. That really makes it difficult to lead a normal life. And I'm sorry for the loss of your mother. But I wish you wouldn't feel guilt because she killed herself. If she was sat on that, it wouldn't have mattered if you moved in with her. You couldn't have lived with her forever. But I get your thoughts and your pain. I wish you the best. I hope you'll get away from California. Try Methadone or Suboxone. It's saved so many people who never thought they'd ever get clean. People have great lives on Suboxone! Try and if you don't like it, just go back to Fentanyl. At least you can say you tried it. Good luck with everything, life ain't over. It actually can be now your real life begins.

[@WilliamHorton-zp7nt]

Thanks for acknowledging me.

[@graemescott1436]

Another good storyteller! Much love man ❤️

[@emptyhanded79]

I am impressed by Billy’s candor, insight, and genuineness. His brain is still in tact. His motivation, compassion, and overall soul are still present. I believe if he and his girlfriend make a decision to say “It’s not too late for us”, then they can get clean. Or even just get into a methadone clinic, and return to society, employment, etc… I have faith that he can be happy and healthy again. I am very hopeful for this person. ♥️

[@ozmonto]

So much love to this beautiful human. Such a heartbreaking journey his life has been. His insight is rare, yet admirable. I hope he finds happiness very soon x

[@tambourine36]

Yes he's a gem and needs to get a better life than this❤

[@rondaduse-anthony6755]

Billy is super duper relatable for me. Much of his past aligns with mine, with some big contrasts as well. Thanks for this interview, Mark. You do great work! Much love to the both of you 🤗

[@rubypaige4685]

Good storyteller, He was honest and direct. I would like to see an update with him and his girlfriend in the future.

[@tambourine36]

Me too I love his voice

[@5p674]

Come on, Billy, you can make it. You're a sincere insightful guy and I hope you get out of this hell life.

[@tambourine36]

Yes hope he gets out soon

[@HonduranTendaroni]

hope he beats this addiction one day. So sad

[@justliss1640]

I relate to Billy so much in regards to his mom ,thinking of you always 💚

[@bunnyolson9484]

One of the very best interviews I have ever seen. I follow your channel 98% of the time ,and enjoy old interviews. I worked as a waitress since the age of 12,then bartender at a strip club,then back to bartender.....everyone has a story Luv your work. 100percent. From the frozen praire of South Dakota 😀

[@angelashoe5354]

Thank you very much for doing these, Mark. You're helping everyone with these videos--the speakers, YOU, and the audience. In the media today, all we see are the rich "frolicking" around on vacation somewhere, which depresses the hell out of everyone. Well, at least it does for me. You're providing a platform for all of these amazing people who have been kicked to the curb, in one way or another (our system FAILED them) to now FINALLY having a voice. They finally can be heard! Up until now, many people just walked or drove by and thought of them as feral animals. Obviously, they are far from that. They feel too deeply and they've been hurt more than their consciousness can take. Anyway, each and every one of these stories is a million times better than 99% of the crap that's available anywhere online or on TV. They're real. They are honest and I feel honored to hear their stories.

[@tambourine36]

Me too❤

[@coco-dr3ii]

It’s bittersweet when Marks asks his interviewees if they had any dreams as a child.. like who would’ve ever guessed that such innocent little children would end up living such depressing lifestyles. No one deserves to live like this. Wishing the best for everyone struggling in this lifestyle. May God shower them with His peace, mercy, and light out of the darkness they’re in.

[@heather1845]

I think that too.. there was a sweet boy .... Like my 8 year old.that just wanted to play. Be happy. Pray 🙏 for him

[@marylougeorge9890]

Amen. So often I look at their eyes and imagine them as children looking up at adults for acknowledgement and help. It's heartbreaking to imagine.

[@averyd7383]

There are a lot of very sad stories on this channel, but this is the first time I seriously cried, and I’m at work damn it!🥺

[@evelyntokamp1011]

@Nose Beer - as long as you don't let the boss see it ;)

[@tambourine36]

You cry if you need to❤

[@erinkatz5073]

His gentle voice, and soft tone is so vulnerable. I see the little boy who just wanted love. Billy, you are a beautiful soul and deserve the best in life. Please don’t give up on yourself. You are loved by so many who listened to your raw recount of your life. There’s a world of people rooting for you to get clean and be happy. Thank you for sharing your story and for being the beautiful person that you are.

[@shawnadenney8098]

Poor guy just seems broken. If you read this Billy, I shot meth from 16 to 43 years old. I am a severe alcoholic and I am coming up on 4 years sober in December. Right now I am at work and I work in the same rehab I graduated from. My story saves lives just like your story can too. When you really want to be sober it can happen. WE DO RECOVER!

[@waitwhat564]

From generation to generation. What chance does a child have living in such an abnormal world that they see as normal. Addiction suppressing the pain of no love growing up, recognising that that’s all we needed and need. Respect for you Billy saying that your mother did the best she could with what she had. I came to that Conclusion too after much anger. My father too. I do hope both you and you loved one get off the streets and both into rehab and live the life you so much deserve. Love from Australia ♥️♥️🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@tambourine36]

Beautiful comments. So encouraging. I think it's important to understand where our parents trauma came from in order to have compassion

[@nicky2times2times10]

I love this channel for the material and the comments. This is how we need to come together. This is how it should be. Bless you Billy and bless everyone else.

[@bashmeesh]

Thank you Billy, I see a shining light coming from your soul. Thanks for sharing. 🤍

[@seanryan7672]

Billy- my brother. What you & I haven’t done… let’s not ever do 😬. Thank you Homie. Love always. You think the court system cares about what we went through? Lol. I’ve seen you while “in” so, yeah, that’s gonna be a hard No. No shame in the truth brother. We grow up, I guess… Now it’s just life. Sometimes I get jealous of the ones who passed on. That’s the sickness. So I need you & I love you & you always have family right here. I know this story & you’re still standing. You can always live in my closet (or my van!!). I mention I love you? See you soon brother.

[@tambourine36]

Please if you have the means and love for this guy try to help him I don't even know him but know he's so awesome

[@shdclrk]

I was a addict and I look back and I did things I thought I’d never do!! Addiction can be so powerful regular people have a hard time understanding. The Good lord pulled me out of addiction. i’ve been clean for 15 years by the grace of God I pray for the best for this young man🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@kaleyjanenigh]

Mark, I just found your videos a few days ago, and I am so happy that I have. I am a recovering EVERYTHING addict (if you had it, I'd take it), but mainly heroin, meth, and Xanax. Heroin was my #1. I have almost 6 years clean, and my oldest son just turned 5. I have two little boys who are my world, and am so blessed to have been given a chance to recover. You are doing insanely important work. So many are quick to shut an addict down, to cast them aside, but every addict is a human being with a story. Whether they are ready to get clean or not, they deserve a chance to tell their stories. Who knows what might happen to any of these beautiful souls, and you are making a record that they were here and that there lives matter. THANK YOU, and please continue this important work!!

[@billyjohnson9166]

Getting almost killed won’t make you go clean nothing will. Mark these sad stories never end.

[@tambourine36]

Everybody has their own bottom. For some it's death unfortunately. I hope he finds a way out he is a good person

[@MummaQuan]

It kills me to see people living this lifestyle. I know how hard it is and how horrible it is just to wake up every day. The only thing on your mind is how am I guna get something today? And it’s never enough. I hope he finds his way out of this, nobody deserves to live this way.

[@tambourine36]

Hope he gets proper medical help for his ailments

[@tambourine36]

He is so easy to listen to. Very compassionate.

[@donaldbrough207]

This is one of the better interviews I’ve seen here, this Guy is honestly honest. Hope he can make it out of this addition. This channel is awesome, thanks Mark.

[@maureent8653]

Such a sad story. Being born addicted. Billy I’m sorry for the life you had to endure. Thank you for sharing your story with all of us. I hope life deals you a better hand..

[@cheryls6484]

Billy, don't give up.. you deserve happiness.. You got clean once and you can do it again.. I feel your pain how you describe your childhood growing up. You have it in you to persevere and make your life worth it. I look forward to your update! Much love.. You Got This Billy!!!!!

[@AMYV3]

Thank you Mark. Just found your channel. I’m very impressed Although this young man is only a few years younger then myself. I just want to hold him raise him again. I know ridiculous. But I can’t help it. All the people that you interview that do drugs all deserve to live a happy good proud life. We caused this problem we must solve it. I know in a country that doesn’t have free healthcare it seems almost impossible to think about a huge overhaul in the rehab system. But that is exactly what we owe all We must demand huge change to fight this. ♥️♥️🇨🇦

[@blueeyes6852]

This is so sad! I wish the best for these people. This medication is an important one. When someone has had a bad enough accident to require surgery, then the doctors tell you, they can't help anymore. Being in a constant level of pain, you get to the point you don't see reasons to stay alive. You can't do anything but lie down and roll around in pain, adjusting pillows, not sleeping, having no personal life, you can end up losing your identity. You get assigned to a pain clinic and are prescribed this medication. You don't get high, you get your life back! Pain being managed is probably one of the least talked about joys in life! When people use this drug to party, to get high ... what it ends up doing is making the medication become taboo! It's NOT the medication, it's the people taking it, that aren't prescribed it! Please don't vilify the medication, please get those that have an addiction into rehab! How many of you could tolerate watching a loved one screaming in pain? Everyday, all day! Could you handle it? What if you were in abject pain and no matter what you do, everytime you move (and all the time if you don't move), you can't escape pain. Please don't let the government take away needed medication. It can become just as deadly, with people committing suicide as those that overdose.

[@crazycatladyjo2688]

I have lived with severe chronic pain for 6 years. I am a chronic pain patient. You don't get your life back, you get the bare minimun. I work 2 days a week but I'm otherwise pretty much bed bound due to pain. You are right about not getting high off my pain medication. I have never felt high from taking pain medication. I'm lucky to get some pain relief from it. I have thought about dying many times. You get to the point were your whole life revolves around the physical pain.

[@nunyabizwacks6711]

yup, and it just masks the pain, and actually makes it even worse if you stop the medication. There has to be better long term solutions. Prescribed or not, the shit does the same thing. Plus, its not like it even makes the pain go away, helps it a little

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@crazycatladyjo2688 My daughter is 38. She's suffered with fibromyalgia since age 11, when they didn't acknowledge it was a physical issue. She was on oxy's but all it did was take the edge off. Her life is like yours. Pot helps the most. Even though it's legal here, the drs won't even prescribe her a few pain pills a month because she uses weed.

[@marinamarazzo5889]

this is exactly my ex boyfriend. born addicted, heroin addict parents, mom died of suicide, tattoo shops, full body, white tank and jeans, vans, big watch, bandana in the back pocket, sad raspy voice, eyes to the ground, honest, solemn, thoughtful, soft natured, now homeless only in santa cruz not LA. dead last, love lost, joey. i will catch you on the flip side, my friend.

[@ricardoruiz6329]

Thank you for everything mark

[@turboshazed7370]

Fentanyl holy fuck... I wish you the best on getting to where you wanna be buddy! Hoping you find brighter days.

[@tambourine36]

Yes me too he needs to get off of Fentanyl

[@AtibaVV]

these videos are good for kids who were abandoned by their parents because it gives the parents on drugs a chance to clear the air. The kids get to hear their side of the story ya know instead of being torn up wondering. I feel like these videos help the kids understand that their parents didnt want to pass their trauma on to them. That unconditional love a parent feels for their child may waver but it never goes away. alot of the addicts i've seen on this channel carrying the pain of not being there just as much as the kids carry the pain of abandonment

[@Lyssa72]

I wish nothing but the best for Billy. He seems like such a genuine person and has a kind heart. Life has not been kind to him and it’s messed up and he deserves GOOD in his life.

[@sandife4nandes365]

I'm from that area. It is beautiful during the day. At night, Dixie is full of street workers. Most are literally barefoot. The rehab capital of the US. The pill mills were shut down in 2004. A lot of collateral damage.

[@gregoryreeves8586]

I Grew up in Jupiter, Florida (Palm Beach County) when blues were bad down there..

[@suezannemarie292]

He looks so young. Sending much love and peace your way ❤. I'm so sorry 😞

[@OutOfTheAether]

It’s sad that he says he’s not suicidal and yet he sitting here saying he’s doing fentanyl all the time and just thinking if it kills me it kills me whatever… That’s slow suicide

[@marylougeorge9890]

I believe anyone doing anything harmful to their health is somewhat suicidal. I don't smoke cigarettes but I vape and will not quit. I eat Lots of sugar. So a part of me is saying I don't care. How much of the population is like this?

[@user-randi1987]

Addiction is suicide on the installment plan

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@user-randi1987 Truth! Great way of putting it.

[@thatlaserlady3899]

You are right. I was accepted into a detox facility bc they asked me if I wanted to harm myself and I told them, every day I try to kill myself by shooting up fentanyl. They accepted me, over 2 years sober now. 💁‍♀️😁

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@thatlaserlady3899 That's Wonderful!!! Congratulations!!!😊👏👏👏💖

[@dface6447]

another great view with this video Mark,Billy i wish you and your other half all the best going forward and i hope you catch a break somewhere soon,so you can both get off the streets and have a safe place to stay!,i know it’s not a lot but i’m sure you’d be happy if the opportunity presented itself 🙂.

[@judysteadman799]

Keep striving Billy, Please get off this life destroying murdering Filthy Fentenyl. Born addicted left you so vulnerable, ongoing horrid situation. Thank you for sharing your story. 🙏 🙏 🙏 praying Billy, you turn this around. Thank you Mark for introducing us to Billy

[@Bricklinsv1970]

He knows his life and where he comes from better than most peolpe that been clean there whole lives.

[@bens9517]

Thats a lot of self reflection and trauma.

[@BobbySacamano]

It's an odd thing. When you're high again, you connect with all those times you've been high. So, in a way, he can recall a lot since he was born.

[@Siennageocatches]

My heart just broke into a million pieces on the floor . Big hugs my friend. You are not alone

[@Mark-gn5rw]

Honesty? For addicts? Is First step to being O.K.! Powerful Testimony right here..wow. We Buffalo NY fam hopes ur gonna be alright Brother.. Godspeed man..

[@marylougeorge9890]

💖

[@imaloserdude7227]

I love this channel, even though I am sad while listening to most if the interviewees. I have noticed that older people speak with humility and regret, while so many young people, barely adults, speak in ignorant arrogance and ugly pride in their recklessness. This guy is super cool and my heart goes out to him.

[@lyteeyes6531]

He has endured so much trauma but it still so grateful … he would be prosperous if he can stay clean Praying for him

[@Fred_and_Brandy]

He's very smart, down to earth and self aware... Ive been an addict 25yrs, on fentanyl since 2005 and on the clinic the last 13 yrs... The thing I regret the most is the destruction of the relationships with the ppl I love... My family, my son, my ex husband (Im female), my friends... I used to have so many friends, but when they found out I was strung out, they all looked at me differently and I basically lost them... Its a sad lonely "life"... I say "life" cuz this aint livin... I don't even really remember what real livin feels like... Ive forgotten what true happiness feels like. Not drug induced happiness. Its devastating actually. I just hope in the next life God doesn't hold this against me😓

[@robinking4532]

I found Billys voice so soothing. I wish him the best in life with him and his girl getting clean.

[@meaganreese9502]

As he shared the history of his life, I couldn't help but shake my head. Not in disbelief, but in silent agreement. As the tears fell, I couldn't help but wonder if he had stolen my history, in order to share it with the world. Lord knows that I am not, yet, that brave. Not yet!

[@stevejyd]

Romans 12:12

[@laurie2968]

Sending you a big hug Meagan. Be gentle with yourself.

[@elexis3728]

Yes, you are brave too. You might not be sharing your story the same way he is but look at what you just done with your comment! You allowed it to be said, period. That’s a big deal too.

[@BabzV]

💜

[@Mark-gn5rw]

Agreed. Stay 👍

[@treaty8631]

Billy you are a smart man...give yourself courage to move forward..your a good man...you have potential.

[@stevietstevens9384]

Sending blessings to Billy It's been a struggle for him. Thank you for what you do without judgement.

[@marylougeorge9890]

Amen.💖

[@monicdavis6150]

I sincerely wish he could find a way to stop the drugs and enjoy a peaceful existence.

[@TrishaB80]

Addiction causes people to do many things they would have never dreamed of doing when sober! Forgive yourself, you are worth it!

[@marylougeorge9890]

Amen!👍❤

[@jaytecee3489]

I wish we could listen to these on a podcast

[@lialacombe71]

So much same!

[@sabwilliams1]

Drugs have so beaten him down that you can see it in his countenance and even the way he sits. Billy, thank you for telling your story with such sincerity and candor. I pray God's intervention in your life and that you are given a true chance at having a life.

[@TheSweetsherrypie]

Billy, you are intelligent and well spoken.

[@WhiteRhino.]

I saw him and thought right away..."he's a S.FL homie"

[@ChrisMinaj2012]

yess.. I lived there for a long time myself.

[@ccway7]

YES!! Recognized all places he spoke of...gold coast, okeechobee... everything

[@lindapowell2397]

I feel for this man & his parents. This isn't always the family history of a herion/Fentenyl addict. Addiction is no respector of person. This happens with people from good loving families. No matter the family dynamics...Addiction is horrible for the addict & the family, friends who love & care for them. It's a frightening hell. May God save & deliver all who suffer as an addict & those who would give anything to save their loved one. 🙏💔

[@themilonas6533]

I’m so sorry billy, I’m so sorry for what you been through… I hope you get the help you need and able to beat this illness. You seem like such a kind soul that just needs another chance at this game called life. Stay strong billy.

[@sandife4nandes365]

Billy has a great deal of insight. I am an incredibly strong person, but, I don't even know if I could have made it with parents using drugs. I have a serious neede phobia. Watching this makes me wonder if I could have made it out. I would hope so. Always have hope.

[@BobbySacamano]

Glad you did, man

[@marylougeorge9890]

I understand. If I had difficulty dealing with my bit of situations, what would I have done dealing with his circumstances?

[@BonHomie87]

For all the people running around these days talking about we’re all living in a simulation and disassociating with the world around them by that virtue, I wish for them to watch a few of these videos followed by a quiet half hour of introspection. All around us there is life. All the bad and good you’ve ever felt in life is there to share with others. Don’t delude yourself into apathy or the fantasy that nothing we do matters when feeling and caring for others matters most. Thanks for sharing your story, Billy. Keep searching.

[@DetroitFettyghost]

Bro I'm 39, I'm 20+ years into using a needle to feed my dope habit, and it's getting VERY hard to find anywhere to shoot. I get real creative. Finding veins on the palms of my hands, feet n sides of feet, chest, my manhood (it bruises so bad when I hit there), you name it like u said I've hit there. Every once in awhile I'll find some magic little stretch of vein a 1/2" long that's not completely scarred and impossible to get to and I'll get 3 or 4 shots in it and then it's toast. I shoot real close to a 1/2 gram if fentanyl at a time. Takes about 7-8 units of water to liquify it enough it don't turn to sludge when blood hits it so I've got very little room for error for getting blood in their to register (only 10 units in a 1cc needle). It's all disgusting. Anyways thanks for your honesty holmes you the real deal, it's rare. I hope you found some healing in having done this.

[@Creativ-Focus]

I pray you seek help for your addiction.

[@Mim795]

You have recognised Billy’s realness, which means you are the same as Billy, a real person and by reaching out to him, shows that you have a good heart on you that shows empathy for others. Man, I wish you well and hope you find something in life that gets you away from that dreaded needle, you deserve happiness 🙏🏻🤍

[@angeladee1463]

Where there is life there is hope. I’m almost 9 years clean from the needle, and I know your pain all too well. I pray you find freedom from addiction and yourself. May God bless you and keep you, until then. 🙏🏼❤️