First video - Life as a lonely man over 40 with (mild) autism

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Aaron's Journal

Aaron's Journal

Жыл бұрын

Loneliness, the empty platitudes, and being a perpetually single autistic spectrum man over 40.
First time I've ever made a video like this. I had been thinking about making a channel like this for a long time and I finally took the plunge. I might regret this. Hopefully, I won't.

Пікірлер: 8 400
@RedLP5000S
@RedLP5000S Жыл бұрын
I'm 47 years old and have never had a serious relationship. I was traumatized at a very young age and have struggled to exist with society ever since. You are NOT alone. You matter.
@adrianmizen5070
@adrianmizen5070 Жыл бұрын
If you want to see real pain, watch some family court videos with poor guys getting divorce-robbed, often to the point of homelessness or jail if they can't pay what the (usually radical feminist) judge decrees. There are worse things than being alone. We should count our blessings.
@Caveman125
@Caveman125 Жыл бұрын
@@adrianmizen5070 I’ve lost a lot of good buddies this way. What a way to go out by being put through the ringer.
@_sigma_male
@_sigma_male Жыл бұрын
me 2 i did something bad and it come back on me so hard im still cant move on
@ChadsYTLife_
@ChadsYTLife_ Жыл бұрын
I felt this comment
@bdmenne
@bdmenne Жыл бұрын
I’ve had significant relationships and I’m bat-shit. Relationships is not an indicator of happiness or health. TRUST ME
@DustyRoadz
@DustyRoadz Жыл бұрын
All I’m gonna say. You’re loved by complete strangers you’ve never met and because of this video you made….. you speak to millions of us. You matter bro
@masterpain7742
@masterpain7742 Жыл бұрын
Lmao bullshit in reality nobody cares about you but the people you know
@DustyRoadz
@DustyRoadz Жыл бұрын
@@masterpain7742 false
@masterpain7742
@masterpain7742 Жыл бұрын
@@DustyRoadz lmao are you so sad you need people on the internet to tell u ur not alone guy??
@DustyRoadz
@DustyRoadz Жыл бұрын
@@masterpain7742 Na, just your mom and I are disappointed in how you turned out
@masterpain7742
@masterpain7742 Жыл бұрын
@@DustyRoadz you live a truly sad existence if you actually believe people on the internet care about u lol
@domepiece11
@domepiece11 Жыл бұрын
This is the curse of Aspergers- wanting much of what other people have but not being able to get it.
@harpsailorharp6716gg
@harpsailorharp6716gg 2 ай бұрын
same here
@brianmeen2158
@brianmeen2158 2 ай бұрын
Yes and I think at some point you need to realize what is possible and what isn’t and try to work within those parameters. Then again there are many men with autism that are happily married either children. The spectrum is quite large it seems
@Wolfa-tr5sq
@Wolfa-tr5sq Ай бұрын
@@brianmeen2158 You're right, its a very large spectrum. I am in the spectrum, a PhD, doing well in my career and throughout my youth, I did reasonably well with women too. My gullibility brought me a wrong spouse, she destroyed me completely from within and then the next woman I found ended whatever remained of me. I am absolutely lonely but manage it by doing more work, reading, coding, creating business ideas etc. I have lost all interest in relationships, but crave it so much. This state is the most hurtful.
@ramalamadingdongdong
@ramalamadingdongdong 17 күн бұрын
I have ADHD trying to get tested for Aspergers. Just need a reason why I have nothing and no one wants me.
@8068
@8068 Жыл бұрын
I am 60 years old, an Army combat vet with multiple tours (and issues), divorced for over 22 years, no kids, friends all dead, family all dead, all alone in a town where people go out of their way to insult and put you down.... yes, I know how you feel. I live it every day.
@starflight777
@starflight777 Жыл бұрын
I hope it gets better for you man, i’ll be your online friend if you really need someone to talk to
@xBINARYGODx
@xBINARYGODx Жыл бұрын
jesus, what kind of town is THAT?
@trebopp5367
@trebopp5367 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for your service old timer❤🎉
@blastermike_sd70ace80
@blastermike_sd70ace80 Жыл бұрын
You're better than 99% of the men in this country. There's women and friends out there sir. Just keep your chin up.
@asdqwe8837
@asdqwe8837 Жыл бұрын
Imperialist assassins deserve no love, only hate.
@FalstadWildhammer
@FalstadWildhammer Жыл бұрын
"I run this endless self-improvement treadmill, wondering at what point will I be worthy of love" That is deep right there.
@espoire_
@espoire_ Жыл бұрын
Look up Take The Black Pill, another man on the spectrum spoke on this in 2015
@18thSTVATO
@18thSTVATO Жыл бұрын
@@espoire_ the black pill is for dweebs who gave up never do . Hope we can all find peace tho
@Bennysol
@Bennysol Жыл бұрын
It all comes down to a man's physical appearance, charisma, and the sound of his voice. I'm 31 and have done everything that's generally expected to be done in this society and I'm still invisible to girl. I'm 5'10" puts me under the 6' physical requirement and I'm scrawny. Owing a house on a nice plot of land has gotten me no attention from any woman because my physical appearance and lack of charism overshadows that
@RiCH_926
@RiCH_926 Жыл бұрын
Damn bro I just found out there's way more people than I thought that feel just like I do it's kind of comforting in that fact but also truly deep sad and fucked up
@davision647
@davision647 Жыл бұрын
shit hit me HARD
@kengause9259
@kengause9259 Жыл бұрын
Social media is full of fake success and happiness. To hear something like this video, so articulate, feels closer to the truth for many people out there. Aaron, we are pulling for you.
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Жыл бұрын
Dude this is the issue you haven't given him any sort of wisdom you've only agreed with what he said not expounded upon it. TIRED OF THIS.
@Lighthawk1986
@Lighthawk1986 Жыл бұрын
@@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Not meaning any offence here. But I’d be amazed if he hadn’t tried most of the advice that people will give on here. All he can do is get out there and try new things where women might be. Try and make friends and focus on the positives. Being down about yourself tends to be a major turn off. Even then there’s not a real guarantee of anything.
@Kaskett
@Kaskett Жыл бұрын
@@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Bro you can find thousands of videos on ways to help with this kinda mindset, millions of people watch them. They never receive compliments/support for anything, if no one is being a dick then just shut up unless you wanna tell us some of this special wisdom that hasn't been repeated a million times.
@joe56474
@joe56474 Жыл бұрын
@@AzamatSlowedAndReverb In my own experience it's more often best just to listen with the intent to understand, rather than to give advice. If someone specifically asks for advice then that's a different story. But unsolicited advice isn't always received very well.
@brownsugga2584
@brownsugga2584 Жыл бұрын
YES!!!!
@marzgirl99
@marzgirl99 Жыл бұрын
“What’s the point of travel when you have nobody to share it with” I feel this so much. My parents tell me to travel but I have no friends and no significant other. There’s no point.
@EvySurvived
@EvySurvived Жыл бұрын
I feel your pain 😞
@rol407
@rol407 Жыл бұрын
I'm sorry.
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 Жыл бұрын
May I ask why you don’t have friends or significant other? It’s very depressing and lonely when someone doesn’t have neither.
@AlienAmerican
@AlienAmerican 6 ай бұрын
It really takes the fun out of it.
@sebp9882
@sebp9882 3 ай бұрын
Yep when you’re alone and travel, you’re just alone in a different location
@xcfitzx
@xcfitzx Жыл бұрын
I’m a 30 year old male who’s never been in a relationship. I feel your pain brother.
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 Жыл бұрын
May I ask why you never been in a relationship? My reply disappeared for some reason G.
@xcfitzx
@xcfitzx Жыл бұрын
@@judgeholder8112 I have pretty severe social anxiety and I also have chronic pain issues that have limited me in life
@yuribezmenovthegreat4705
@yuribezmenovthegreat4705 10 ай бұрын
​@@judgeholder8112I'm just 20 and never experienced anything like love. And I feel like cmon bro... I better be 3 meters underground
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 7 ай бұрын
@@yuribezmenovthegreat4705 I see
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 7 ай бұрын
@@iamme25yago right
@AdamJC88Zeitgeist
@AdamJC88Zeitgeist Жыл бұрын
Man, the balls it takes to open up on video like this, and be so openly vulnerable like this, when you're depressed and in pain. You're stronger than you know, just for doing this. I've already watched a bunch of your other videos that you've posted after this one. This open vulnerability is a huge display of strength, whether you know it or not, and it will help others. Keep it up man, you will find your way. Thank you for sharing this. 💪❤️
@southlondon86
@southlondon86 Жыл бұрын
Exactly he is very brave.
@LarsRyeJeppesen
@LarsRyeJeppesen Жыл бұрын
Yep, he has balls
@confusedzombie99
@confusedzombie99 Жыл бұрын
nothing short of bravery
@Portia620
@Portia620 Жыл бұрын
Truths! Real men!!! ❤️🙏🥂. Don’t give up but definitely you’re gonna have to put yourself out there and get involved in a lot of things volunteer work everything and keep asking so what if you fail it’s better than never trying.
@timi_ro
@timi_ro Жыл бұрын
I don't know man, people are assholes, if they find you vulnerable they laugh at you and call you an incel...hmm, maybe you're right, it takes balls to expose yourself like that, knowing the risks!
@dave9118
@dave9118 Жыл бұрын
There is a reason this video has 136,000 views. There are many lonely people and many people in toxic relationships. You are doing a great service by opening up and expressing your innermost feelings and fears. There are many people who can relate. You deserve love and happiness. I hope you meet a good woman who appreciates you.
@SamStone1964
@SamStone1964 Жыл бұрын
People have to connect with themselves.
@skpy8249
@skpy8249 Жыл бұрын
Same I hope Aaron finds someone now because that's ridiculous.
@haileybclean
@haileybclean Жыл бұрын
Can we talk about your Austin powers poster?! Yeah baby! You’re awesome. You’re worthy. Keep sharing your thoughts and feelings we all love it ❤
@andrewmc147
@andrewmc147 Жыл бұрын
Yeah nice to see some real reality instead of all the fake bullshit on youtube/instagram etc.
@andrewmc147
@andrewmc147 Жыл бұрын
@cool your username is "cool" and you're calling people losers. You're basically just insulting yourself at this point lol who do you think you're fooling
@joeblack7326
@joeblack7326 27 күн бұрын
I'm a 36 year old male bachelor and a couple of years ago I was in your position. Getting drunk every day, feeling lonely, sad, empty and given up on love, life, and having a family. I had no purpose and I'm done with life. Until one night on January last year (2023) I then come across a Korean TV show called "I Live Alone" where famous and very good looking male/female celebrities are showing their day to day normal lives as bachelors, and they were enjoying it and finding happiness in living on their own. I was kinda a Kpop fan, and in a way the show somehow healed me and realized that hey it's not that bad at all. If these rich and beautiful/handsome celebrities are happy with being single/bachelor and living a simple life, then why can't I just be inspired by them and just focus on loving and bettering myself. I marathon-watched the series the whole year and truly it made me changed my outlook and I'm in a much better place now tbh. Being alone means you have freedom. And it's something I learned that is a luxury as a single man, so I'm trying to make the best of it each day. Visit places alone. Travel the road alone. Eat a whole box of pizza. Try great restaurants. Buy stuff for yourself like gadgets, shoes, clothes. Get a motorcycle. Get a dog. A lof of exciting things are out there if you just kill the thought that you need someone to be happy. I love my parents and my siblings, and I've accepted the bachelor life. I honestly and truly feel that I'm better off alone than having a commitment with someone, and I'm absolutely ok with that. I love it. All the best to you and to everyone who reads this.
@Amber24426
@Amber24426 24 күн бұрын
Appreciate you sharing this. Going to try and see if I can implement some of what you’ve written here into my own life moving forward.
@Userhandle7384
@Userhandle7384 Жыл бұрын
I don’t have ASD, im married and have kids, but I still feel so alone every day. Im listening to you now while lying in my bed with tears in my eyes. I wish life wasn’t so hard… thanks because your video helps me feel less alone
@AbhishekP-nl2co
@AbhishekP-nl2co Жыл бұрын
stop saying life embrace challenges and over come them. Be grateful that u have a great life and is not like him. Stay strong king YOU WILL GET THROUGH IT!! 👑👑👑
@black11189
@black11189 9 ай бұрын
What is ASD
@noone-he1ho
@noone-he1ho 9 ай бұрын
Lucky you man, be grateful you are normal and you fit in because there are people who will never experience that because of this disability.
@mariestrawberryswirl2171
@mariestrawberryswirl2171 6 ай бұрын
That means autism spectrum disorder
@citycrusher9308
@citycrusher9308 6 ай бұрын
@@noone-he1ho How is he lucky? the ''golden marriage and children'' didn't change anything for him.
@fmxmyway
@fmxmyway Жыл бұрын
Dude you have no idea how not alone you are. Its more common than you think just people don't have the balls like you to own it and if they do, they're made fun of for it. You got some balls dude, mad respect to you. Stay in the fight, its ok to be who you are.
@surreal_seb
@surreal_seb Жыл бұрын
second that.. one thing I've heard, if you are single, you consider a serious relationship, but once you get it, you want to jump. I have a few close friends whom have remained generally not married in their 30s & three of which are very successful. Rock on 🤘🏽✌🏾
@michaelangst6078
@michaelangst6078 Жыл бұрын
Yet, if you watch red pill channels, apparently women are more lonely on average than men when they are 40+.... So sad that men have to lie to themselves just to avoid wanting to blow their brains out
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Жыл бұрын
Stop with the pity party offer him wisdom and advice.
@cococop6679
@cococop6679 Жыл бұрын
@@AzamatSlowedAndReverb I find people like you fascinating. Instead of dedicating your time to actually giving the man in the video any advice, you choose to take that time and spend it leaving a bunch comments telling other people to give him good advice.
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Жыл бұрын
@@cococop6679 already left 3 paragraphs of comments nothing was responded to
@pineapplepizza4016
@pineapplepizza4016 Жыл бұрын
I'm not autistic, but I was the shy, introverted, low self-confidence guy who was never was good at socializing. I've been where you're at, but I got married for the first time at 46. So, there's always hope.
@Sidewinder1999
@Sidewinder1999 Жыл бұрын
When did you first get a girlfriend?
@Danuxsy
@Danuxsy Жыл бұрын
@@Sidewinder1999 when he began dreaming
@Ghazithasoulja
@Ghazithasoulja Жыл бұрын
@@Danuxsy haahhahahaahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahaahahaha u wrong for that lmao
@erinmarie1334
@erinmarie1334 Жыл бұрын
@@Ghazithasoulja and you're just as wrong. small itty bitty dick energy frfr
@adepressedcatwithabadnicot246
@adepressedcatwithabadnicot246 Жыл бұрын
you can't drop a bombshell like that and not elaborate further
@Eis4Electric
@Eis4Electric Жыл бұрын
First off brother, you look great for 44. Second, you have a mellow way of explaining your situation that makes this subject matter relatable for a lot of people. You come across as genuine and with a unique form of wisdom. You're honest and I appreciate how open your are about your struggles. With that being said: I know my advice wouldn't work for you because our mindsets are different. I consider myself a "social loner." I have a small group of friends currently that I've had good times with but I also do a lot of things on my own. From what I've deduced from your video, is that you've had a variety of social experiences already, but you don't have any of that stimuli currently and it makes you feel inadequate. Let me tell you, broski, is that even married and coupled people feel inadequate. Especially those in abusive relationships. But they stay, because they can't stand the thought of being alone. They may think they are getting their physical and emotional needs met, but I guarantee you that half of them aren't. Why do you think the divorce rate has escslted over the last 40 years? You see these couples from the past, through America's so-called golden age, who were together to death. But at what cost to the individual? They went to the grave, and how many of them are already forgotten, with a partner or no partner. Kids or no kids. I will give you a bit of advice all of the same. DO NOT sacrifice your individuality. Do not sell yourself short. Don't be deterred by labels others may want to hoist onto you. You bring something to the world in your own special way. I myself was diagnosed with autism when I was a toddler. It was thanks to the love of my parents that pulled me out of my thick shell I was in. This world is not kind to those with any neurodivergency. It's utterly cruel. But there is joy to be found. Even though I was diagnosed with autism at such a young age, I don't see myself as such. I certainly didn't in my 20's. Perhaps in my late 30's is when I started acknowledging that past diagnosis. I always behaved differently than anyone else. I had such a kooky and funky outlook on life and that can either rub people the wrong way or make them question what your intentions are or who you are as a person in the grand scheme of things. But, I've brought forth joy onto others throughout my life. I'm happy I was able to do as much. They say autism is for life, but I don't care. Because I don't let something like that define me. I also don't broadcast myself as autistic to the wider world, either. People can take me at face value or not. You say you make music? Did I hear that right? Music is one of God's greatest gifts bestowed onto us. You put forth positive energy to the world with your creations. Find joy every time you compose something. Remember: YOU did that. Nobody else but you. Gratitude goes a long way, sir. You have to be grateful for things you normally overlook. You're not in a coma in the hospital. You have two strong legs to walk on. You can go to the bathroom on your own without assistance. You have all of the tools to be self-sufficient. Make the most out of things like this and you'll realize how lucky you are in regards to that. Take the time to work on some self-care. Take a nice and warm soak with some epsom salts and relieve your tired body and mind. Find refuge in the gift of music. I'd be happy to share some recommendations for songs for you if you're open to it. Open your lungs and mind with a woodland hike. Nature is yet another of God's greatest gifts to us. Let it heal your soul. I am 40. So you're older than me. But I want you to know after watching this video, I look up to you. You have gained another younger brother. I'm very thankful you've put something like this video out in the world. You've made a lot of people relate to you when they thought they were the only ones in the world. I hope you find strength in what I've said. If you want that woman in your life, so be it. I hope you find her. I wish you the best of luck in your pursuits in regards to that. But, if it doesn't happen, do not give into despair. Don't compare yourself to what others have. I send you the best of wishes, good health and happiness as you journey through this life. The same goes for anybody who comes across this message of mine. Let's make our lives matter, in whatever way we can before our time on this earth is up.
@shanaribbons5303
@shanaribbons5303 Жыл бұрын
I love this comment. You said it perfect! And exactly having a diagnoses doesn’t make a person that diagnoses and doesn’t define them. I actually watched a movie yesterday. It was really good and emotional. “ words on bathroom walls” you should check it out if u want
@rosiecuevas1192
@rosiecuevas1192 Жыл бұрын
THIS!
@dirtydangler
@dirtydangler Жыл бұрын
This was a lovely read, I'm 33 and could take some advice from this.
@realest_shirts
@realest_shirts Жыл бұрын
Yeah man, I concur with what you're saying here. I'm 45. I've got some wild OCD stuff going on, and it's basically messed with me pretty bad over the years. I've had some relationships, yeah, but they all crashed and burned. Even though I'm 45, I don't think of myself that way. I have friends who act like their life is over, but mine's just getting started IMO. I've been fasting, losing weight, taking some NMN, looking half decent, trimming my whiskers. It's true that there is a bit of a shortage of reasonable, lovely women in the west. They're either taken or they're unhinged wokeoids. I generally date girls younger than me. I've tried sugar daddy stuff, tided me over for a few years. For this dude, he might wanna try Date In Asia, as there are a lot of women on there with traditional values who are in the Philippines, but would make good wives. I ended up meeting a girl online (on Fiverr lol) who lives in Venezuela, who is pretty cute and seems to like me. Just don't let them scam you. Anyway, I'm alone a lot of the time. I go to parties and leave - bored. I kinda hate hookup culture. Anyway, both this video and you're comment got me thinking a bit. Bottom line is, this guy doesn't need to despair so much, although I do understand what he's going through. I go to bed alone too. I've lost people I loved to various things. A lot of people don't get it and don't care. Also, the music comment is key. Music has buoyed me through a lot. In a way, it's all I need in a given day. But yeah bros, we gotta support each other, it can get rough out there.
@tooxtalivai0690
@tooxtalivai0690 Жыл бұрын
@Humbug it isn’t young either, old for some cultures too. I’m thinking your either white or Asian. Mfers live forever.
@Fuerwahrhalunke
@Fuerwahrhalunke Жыл бұрын
As a nearly 28 year old guy, I've been alone for the last 11 years since my dad died. There just isn't any reason for me to go outside, except for working. I have no friends or relationships and most of my day is me staying at home and working on different projects. There are millions like yourself out there and you will find all of them on the internet. That's the way I connected to some over the years. It's not the same as a real life friend, s.o or wife, but it can numb the loneliness for a couple of hours a day. Hang in there, you are not alone.
@serumser1
@serumser1 Жыл бұрын
not one reason? 28 is very young! go walk, run, have fun. eventually you will see some girl. stay strong
@rosiecuevas1192
@rosiecuevas1192 Жыл бұрын
I agree with SER 1 SER: if you want to be part of a couple, go find it. Same with the youtuber. 😍
@abcwow2400
@abcwow2400 Жыл бұрын
@@serumser1 im 27 and i feel like there is no point. with introverts i think we dont want to navigate within the communication and the signals. its all messed up tbh.
@martinvr12
@martinvr12 Жыл бұрын
So sorry about your dad, is a shame this things happens, I can relate, I'm 25, I don't have irl friends, my only irl friend died like 2 years ago, I only have online friends, I suffer from ptsd but is incredible and somewhat relieving not to be alone.. I wish you the best tho, there still plenty to live and experience, and hopefully you find the most happiness dude! Cheers.
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 Жыл бұрын
@@martinvr12 I’m 25 as well and I only have a very few friends in real life. I so have some online friends, but they’re not intimate friends. May I ask why you have PTSD? I can be your online friend if you want to.
@igloozoo3771
@igloozoo3771 Жыл бұрын
For a loner, I know it takes crazy effort to put yourself out there and be transparent so I do applaud you for making that large leap of faith.
@TheFrenchPug
@TheFrenchPug Жыл бұрын
Although this may be therapeutic, I don't think he wants this on interwebs. Just my opinion. This is something for a therapist in a one on one environment.
@sloppyjonuts9162
@sloppyjonuts9162 Жыл бұрын
I’m a loner. I can’t have a regular conversation. My mind runs blank And I’m not witty or have comebacks or king of the one liners 😊
@rosiecuevas1192
@rosiecuevas1192 Жыл бұрын
I agree. Your courage is impressive.
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 Жыл бұрын
🫂🫂🫂🤗🤗🤗
@brianmeen2158
@brianmeen2158 9 ай бұрын
@@sloppyjonuts9162 sure you can. You sound like you have anxiety and not good social skills . Just try to ask people questions about themselves and follow that up with a detail about yourself .. basic conversations are pretty easy to maintain but you must practice at them To get better
@davcuts2897
@davcuts2897 Жыл бұрын
I'm 51, a virgin, and I couldn't be happier. I guess I'm blessed because of my ASD I'm so socially awkward I'm perfectly content being alone. My heart aches for you, and one time I felt a lot like you, but when I finally got my ASD diagnosis I decided to embrace that I'm always going to be this way. I love animals and they are the only companionship I need.
@amodernalchemist432
@amodernalchemist432 Жыл бұрын
Pets are great. Sometimes I'd rather be with my cat than around people. They don't complain, b¡tch, nag and they never treat us like shit.
@SkycladWanderer
@SkycladWanderer Жыл бұрын
Good for you.
@davcuts2897
@davcuts2897 Жыл бұрын
@The Darkcel no, I have sexual desire. But like a lot of others with ASD I have problems with senses. Mine mainly being touch. I do not want to be touched. I also have problems with smell. If I see someone attractive and then see them start to smoke I lose all interest right then and there because I hate the smell of cigarette smoke so much. I used to be a lot like this guy and wondered why I can't find anyone. All the while having plenty of opportunities to have sex, but I would always turn them down for one reason or another. Before I was diagnosed with ASD I would beat myself up for not being able to find a partner and my inability to make friends. Now that I know I have ASD I've decided just to embrace who I am. I do know that's not enough for others. And my heart goes out to them. But I decided a long time ago I don't need someone else to be happy. If anything I was making myself miserable telling myself I did.
@JoinTheProgress
@JoinTheProgress Жыл бұрын
@@amodernalchemist432 Kidding me? Animals are WAY better than people, lol. People are mostly shtbags. I make exceptions for children and seniors, but the rest of them are mostly sewage, lol.
@amodernalchemist432
@amodernalchemist432 Жыл бұрын
@@JoinTheProgress yeah, for sure, there are very few exceptions...
@Pickdivision
@Pickdivision 7 ай бұрын
I feel so sorry for this man. I have autism too, and I know being lonely alot can worsen your mental health. Just stay strong.
@paulbeaney4901
@paulbeaney4901 5 ай бұрын
Even the strongest material repeatedly stressed will not stay strong forever, it will eventually fail. But i get you sentiment.
@MarkAtherton-bf4pq
@MarkAtherton-bf4pq Жыл бұрын
I'm almost 50 and have never been married, haven't had many girlfriends, and never had a relationship last for even three years. I'm a good looking, healthy man, and have a great career. I've spent my entire adult life trying to figure out why I can't seem to create or keep relationships. I identify with darn near everything you said. And it doesn't get easier as we get older. Just a bleak horizon of fewer options, and more meals, more holidays, more of everything ....alone. And like you also said, there's nobody else to support you in daily challenges. Besides the loneliness, it's embarassing as hell to be 'that guy' who never go married. On the very rare occassion when I do find a date, they ALWAYS ask "do you have kids ...ever been married"? And when you tell them "no, neither", you can see the shock in their face ...and you know you won't get another date with them. It's just too weird for 'normal' women to understand.
@Zeburaman2005
@Zeburaman2005 7 ай бұрын
Being slightly younger than you and having had similar experiences regarding women and the marriage question, I came to the conclusion that people thinking and judging others along those lines are arseholes with a very limited understanding of life. That is a type of “normalcy” I learned to absolutely refuse to come in contact with, since such people generally don’t seem aware that it takes two to tango and make relationships work. And fewer still seem to understand how difficult it is to start over past 50. I have had many short relationships with women in the 45-60 yo range while in my thirties and most of them turned out to be in love with the _idea_ of a relationship, yet unable to put it in the effort to make it work. Have you tried looking into dating foreign women? You might actually have better luck with Japanese career women over 45, due to Japan’s stereotype that unmarried women over 30 have something wrong with them. There even is a special term for them that translates as “past the consumption’s date”.
@scottb252
@scottb252 Жыл бұрын
48, never married, no kids, never really had a serious relationship. My problem is social anxiety. Your not alone brother. I don't feel bad about it though, I've already accepted it and if someday I meet someone that I can feel comfortable around and fall in love with, fine, but if not, that's fine too! We all don't have to follow the status quo of getting married and having kids to be happy.
@giorgioladd8720
@giorgioladd8720 Жыл бұрын
Dude just take some benzos wtf is wrong with yoy
@btoyou
@btoyou Жыл бұрын
I suffer for anxiety as well. You’re not alone.
@maikerutv3383
@maikerutv3383 Жыл бұрын
This is how I was and finally meant a girl that loves me for me, keep this mentality it’s the best possible way to look at it
@lynnkowalla1315
@lynnkowalla1315 Жыл бұрын
Is that it really? Social anxiety? I think that sometimes but really I am just very happily introverted and I get nervous talking to people cuz I don't do it often. I was fortunate to find a mate who was also very introverted. We just enjoyed being together. But it's hard for two introverts to meet.
@GoodWillPrevail
@GoodWillPrevail Жыл бұрын
I have social anxiety also. It is painful!
@bullitt0713
@bullitt0713 Жыл бұрын
I am a “normal” 44 year old woman and I’m still single. Never married, no kids. Growing up I was told to focus on my school and a relationship will happen naturally. It never happened. Going through college, I was told to focus on my degree and a relationship will come when I least expect it. It never happened. I started working and I was told to focus on my work and “the one” will come along. It never happened. I am now 44 years old and I feel the same way you do. I am a school teacher. I love kids. I always assumed I would be a mom someday. I think I would have been a good mom. It truly makes me sad when I see everyone else around me happily married and with children. I wish I knew what that felt like. I wish I didn’t have to do everything by myself. I feel like life would be easier if I had a partner. 😢
@Danuxsy
@Danuxsy Жыл бұрын
this is actually sad for real because you are basically past the age of having children at this point, I hope you find a partner though sometime so you don't have to sit all by yourself when you're older.
@TheToxicGunn3r
@TheToxicGunn3r Жыл бұрын
Very sad because this is what society has told women for a few decades now and it seems like women (and men who would gladly take these women) end up extremely unhappy as a result. They have an innate drive to nurture and be a mother. Women don't have forever to do this, unfortunately. A guy can still get a girl pregnant most of his life, a women really has 18-35/40 before it becomes extremely difficult. Thank you for being honest and hope things work out well for you!
@gsquared2394
@gsquared2394 Жыл бұрын
Feminism told you to get your degree and get your career because you can get a man later, be strong and independent. You’ve been totally fucked over. I’m so sorry.
@honeyrose7663
@honeyrose7663 Жыл бұрын
@@TheToxicGunn3r don't men need viagara and have ED and such? Plus most young women prefer guys around there old age not frankenstein. Yeah men miss the boat too. Why are u worried abt women's fertility and what they do with their bodies? E tremely weird
@honeyrose7663
@honeyrose7663 Жыл бұрын
@@gsquared2394 I don't think she's talking about a degree or a career. She was just saying she was waiting for the right one and they never came.
@GobanShodan
@GobanShodan Жыл бұрын
I'm only 25 but I've felt the same way as you since I graduated from high school. I have no words of encouragement that you haven't already heard a million times, I just hope we find what we're looking for.
@TraversyMedia
@TraversyMedia Жыл бұрын
I am married with two kids, one with low-functioning autism. Sometimes, it gets so stressful that I think "Being alone must be great". I am someone that really enjoys my alone time. However, I think after a couple weeks, I would be even more stressed. This video helps me see how lucky I am. Great video. Also, you most certainly are good enough and I think you will find the right person. You seem like a good dude.
@mkum2141
@mkum2141 Жыл бұрын
Didnt expect to see you here Brad. Thanks for the top notch programming videos mate
@laddrusso5243
@laddrusso5243 Жыл бұрын
Bro you gave me a job lmao
@charliegunthers
@charliegunthers Жыл бұрын
Seeing you here is like seeing your high school teacher at the grocery store
@apolloniusbeitsman5444
@apolloniusbeitsman5444 8 ай бұрын
Another person bragging about having a family on a vid about loneliness. How tone deaf are you... a big f you to you.
@steelearmstrong9616
@steelearmstrong9616 7 ай бұрын
I love my own company. The idea of living with anyone turns me off and I have options and have everything a partner would want. Not being independent and being dependent on others is a horrible life to live. This is not happiness and quite a sad life to live. I need my freedom. You only have one shot at life. Tomorrow is not promised. Tomorrow does not exist.
@bshatney
@bshatney Жыл бұрын
I'm 37 and right there with you in many ways. Decent looking, i work out and take care of myself but... High functioning autistic, I've got severe social anxiety. For me it's work, gym, cold lonely house. Wish I had some comforting words but I'm living what you're describing and... well, you get it.
@bshatney
@bshatney Жыл бұрын
@J 808 i didn't find out til I was 31. Knew something was up since I was a kid just didn't really look into it.
@kappaslapper14
@kappaslapper14 Жыл бұрын
ME too people , I'm lucky to still have my parents and siblings (I'm 41 ) But do worry for the days when I don't have them around :(
@aaronhallink4489
@aaronhallink4489 Жыл бұрын
you are not alone. People want you to feel good
@Karll541
@Karll541 Жыл бұрын
The world is more unforgiving than ever
@toobalkain
@toobalkain Жыл бұрын
what's the difference between being autistic and being a whiner? -cuz it sure overlaps a lot.
@nkyryry
@nkyryry Жыл бұрын
You’re not alone. I wish lonely people knew how to find other lonely people. There are SO MANY PEOPLE feeling exactly like this that need each other.
@supernova11711
@supernova11711 Жыл бұрын
Exactly!!! There’s plenty of people out there like him and who feel exactly the same way he does! He just has to find ONE of them! He’s good looking and seems really sweet. There’s plenty of women who would love to date him. The problem is that most of them are hiding or too scared to put themselves out there. It’s really sad.
@nifflofair6685
@nifflofair6685 Жыл бұрын
I blame the internet as it gives people a false sense of inclusion by watching , ticking and commenting on people's posts we know but don't interact with irl, it's a false sense of security for a few hours, turn it off and you're alone until next tim e you switch on. People are being led into lonely lives. Even shopping is becoming a lonelier task as self service checkouts will lead to more stress and !ess interaction as we had with fellow shoppers and assistants, not to mention the loss of checkout assistants' jobs and our own enforced free labour doing our own checkout work. Don't use unmanned checkouts and save jobs.
@emmy_okaye9942
@emmy_okaye9942 Жыл бұрын
Does anyone know of any website or social platform that has worked for them regarding this issue? I'm not intelligent or creative enough to start something. But definitely would be nice to have something.
@RetroReminiscing
@RetroReminiscing Жыл бұрын
@@emmy_okaye9942 Never underestimate what hidden talents and abilities you have just waiting to be used 🤗🤗
@David-eu1ms
@David-eu1ms Жыл бұрын
There are just as many songs about lonliness as falling in love.
@life4trinity
@life4trinity Жыл бұрын
I'm 21 and I'm afraid I will end up in your shoes. I never developed any relationship skills in school and I only ever had a small friend group. And a lot of those friends I had are always busy and never have time to hang out. I've never been kissed or had a girl hold my hand outside of dance class. Looking at my future, I don't see how this is gonna get any better, especially the older I get with zero experience, the more undesirable I become.
@markuchiha7737
@markuchiha7737 Жыл бұрын
You're too young for this kid. There's so much to explore.
@TheReaper1557
@TheReaper1557 9 ай бұрын
Not to be a bummer but probs y ea. I know everyone says that your hope for relationships goes away because of the past but that id not true. Become OBESSESED with being better and/or learning about people things so much. Its definitly harder for us, but im much better off now than the day before. And the day before that. :) You got this 👍
@Zeburaman2005
@Zeburaman2005 7 ай бұрын
You’ve got to try different approaches that gel with who you are and try to leave your comfort zone without betraying your personality or trying to pass as something completely different. My twenties were extremely solitary though mentally stimulating, while my early thirties taught me the ropes and pitfalls of dating and relationships. I was often confronted with toxic people and hypocrites that I had to learn to cut off from my life in order to flourish. Somehow, I lucked out at 37 by meeting a foreign woman that actually wanted a solid relationship, unlike many women who are only in love with the idea of it yet unwilling to put in the hard work. And we’re together to this day. So, like the other commenters have said, you are too young to give up. Perseverance, working/concentrating on yourself, and luck are going to help find meaning in your own life, and maybe love will be part of the equation. Giving up will only ensure stagnation and deterioration of your emotional wellbeing.
@backseateats9513
@backseateats9513 6 ай бұрын
If you have a above average penis you will be fine I’m single because I have a small penis and I’m embarrassed of what a lady will think. I have offers but I turn them down
@leehamilton4459
@leehamilton4459 Жыл бұрын
You should know that many of us who are married are actually still just alone. People try to portray marriage in the most positive light but sometimes, behind the scenes, there's not much cuddling or real closeness going on.
@bradford_shaun_murray
@bradford_shaun_murray Жыл бұрын
true, it gets like that
@nataliekhanyola5669
@nataliekhanyola5669 10 ай бұрын
Yup!💯💯💯
@steelearmstrong9616
@steelearmstrong9616 7 ай бұрын
Married people are sad people that are and always have been dependent on others to make one happy. It’s no way to live, but unfortunately most do
@LDT7Y
@LDT7Y 3 ай бұрын
Yep, you could marry a nice gold-digger who demands you buy her a big house, pets, nice stuff, then trash talks you to everyone she meets, hooks up with other men behind your back, and gradually quits having sex or making any effort to pretend to love you. And since she now has her claws in half of everything you own, you are stuck with that. But you have to keep pretending everything is fine to yourself and everyone around you.
@Lone_Wolf1022
@Lone_Wolf1022 Жыл бұрын
Aaron stay strong. I’m 44 as well. 20 year ARMY veteran. I was alone for the first 18 years. During that time I had to learn how to deal with loneliness. Some things that helped me: Martial arts(BJJ), working out , hiking, archery, David goggins books, a dog is a big moral booster. Find your own meaning and purpose and learn to master your mind. Best wishes to you. Know your not alone in this journey.
@BenLinfordUK
@BenLinfordUK Жыл бұрын
I was going to say, a dog would make a great companion and you could meet somebody whilst out walking in various places.
@kodakwhite6194
@kodakwhite6194 Жыл бұрын
Well said mate
@zexnynex777
@zexnynex777 Жыл бұрын
Tell him dude, i told him to go watch a TRex Arms video because they are good at sucking people in. Not to mention its easier to have expensive hobbies when your single (cough cough)
@HalConick
@HalConick Жыл бұрын
BJJ definitely. You will feel challenged socially, emotionally, and physically. You will, if you find a gym with a good culture, find support from a group of driven and friendly people. I think you’ll find more confidence. And it’s a beautiful, complex sport. Also, Aaron, I’ve felt a lot of what you feel. Know this: You’re worthy. You’re worth accepting as you are, even these tough feelings, even the loneliness. And some part of you knows this, since you’re working out and putting yourself out there like this. I challenge you to put yourself out there like this with women out in the world. Read Glover’s Dating Essentials for Men and go do the challenges-one is go out and get rejected 5-6 times. It takes the pressure of success off and, in turn, likely gives you some success. And if I may, get with a pro who can help you feel less bummed. The right one will help a ton.
@drellz9361
@drellz9361 Жыл бұрын
I’m thinking of joining the army
@HowToGains
@HowToGains Жыл бұрын
Man I don’t know how this guy doesn’t absolutely smash the dating market.
@irishcountrygirl78
@irishcountrygirl78 Жыл бұрын
Social anxiety. He's exactly like my 17 yr old ASD boy. I worry all the time, even though he's a talented artist and says he's really content, l still have a niggling feeling, I'm introverted, but would be lonely without a mate, l really hope my son finds his voice in this world, just to find his path outside of his comfort zone.
@thestricklandchroniclesfam4131
@thestricklandchroniclesfam4131 Жыл бұрын
He is beautiful!!
@thestricklandchroniclesfam4131
@thestricklandchroniclesfam4131 Жыл бұрын
You are so handsome & so very vulnerable. This is what we actually want. An honest man who is open about who he is... No matter the social category
@di3486
@di3486 Жыл бұрын
You have to live with someone with ASD to understand
@di3486
@di3486 Жыл бұрын
@@StevenMacQuarrie Exactly right, the “weirdness”. As a woman I know how it feels to be that weirdo nobody wants.
@DarkCarbuncle11
@DarkCarbuncle11 Жыл бұрын
I can relate to what you’re going through. About to turn 37, never had a relationship, no friends. Work, go home, repeat. All I can tell you is we’re in this rough ride together.
@thatducklady
@thatducklady Жыл бұрын
Awestruck. This is exactly where I am mentally, emotionally, socially. 44yo F but I have experienced the same struggles and thus remain single. I often think I must be the only one in this place. Being over 40, never married or involved, no children, no prospects, gets me a lot of judgment as if I have failed as a woman. I'm very likely to be in the same boat for the rest of my life. Sometimes I am fine with that. Other times I am distraught by it. I continue to make music, create art, enjoy nature, pursue hobbies and goals, and find joy in sharing those things with me, myself, and I. If I'm meant to share with another human, I'll let it happen organically; I'm not going to frantically search. The options are sparse, aren't they? As if 40 is the end of human potential or value as a mate? Hardly. It's really just the beginning in many ways.
@Mutiny960
@Mutiny960 Жыл бұрын
I have some hard truth for you. As as F no matter what age, you only have to do 1 thing. Be in shape, that's it. Your autistic idiosyncrasies are seen as "quirky and cute" where men's are seen as "creepy and scary". Go work yourself to death in the gym and be ultra strict on your diet everyday for 6 months straight. I GUARANTEE You will find a good man to love and cherish you, even on a dating app. He won't be the hottest, and he won't be the richest, but he will be a "good" man. If not, I'll give you my address and you can come slap me in the face in-person. But only if you honest with yourself on whether you followed through. The "average" man doesn't care if you look like a supermodel, he doesn't care if you don't wear makeup and have some wrinkles, only that you look like you take care of yourself and can take care of him. MILF porn is extremely popular for a reason. They sell the fantasy of the exact type of person you can be in-real life in 6 MONTHS. Bonus Points: You ain't go no kids or baby daddy drama. It's March 19th a man would have to work for years, building his social status and career to have the same dating value you can get by Christmas. Go do it.
@deusfusion7945
@deusfusion7945 Жыл бұрын
​@@Reeeeeee12345 try to be a bit more sympathetic bro 😂 I get you though
@FeyPax
@FeyPax Жыл бұрын
@@Reeeeeee12345 shut up. We are all literally in this together. Getting laid also doesn’t equal not being lonely for the rest of your life.
@rol407
@rol407 Жыл бұрын
I see in the comments lot of hurtin people. It's sad. I myself had very low self worth and I'm tired of living miserable I just want god to take me and then I cry in prey I apologise to god that in such a terrible human being weak nobody treated like trash so I deserve it I guess
@harpsailorharp6716gg
@harpsailorharp6716gg 2 ай бұрын
I'm.48 female no kids by choice . ...have aspergers....live with my bf been with him.8 year but still feel.lonely .I have no best mate x
@colonelmann
@colonelmann Жыл бұрын
Most pleasant video I've watched recently. Not Flashy, not click bait, just genuine heartfelt dude sharing with all of us!
@TheSnowmanBKK
@TheSnowmanBKK Жыл бұрын
Agree , he doesn’t try and deliver his message with gesticulating exaggerated mannerisms and fake bonhomie. Just talks.
@Cosme_
@Cosme_ Жыл бұрын
I agree, im 23, im still young, but im single and i´ve never had a serious relationship and i enjoyed every second of this video.
@Rendog2
@Rendog2 Жыл бұрын
Agreed.
@ingeborgswieten3710
@ingeborgswieten3710 Жыл бұрын
Agree, completely listened without even making a sound.. its so empathy-inducing and educative also.. we need to ask more questions to eachother instead of judging eachother..
@JoinTheProgress
@JoinTheProgress Жыл бұрын
Not sure "pleasant" is the right word tho, lol
@JLKeener77
@JLKeener77 Жыл бұрын
This video hit me hard. You basically recounted my biography and my day-to-day life. Absolutely pointless wage slaving with nothing to look forward to. Grinding loneliness.
@manager4409
@manager4409 Жыл бұрын
It made me feel slightly better knowing it wasn't just me going through this. Obviously something wrong with our society. You're not some extreme exception.
@AblackGenie
@AblackGenie Жыл бұрын
@@manager4409 is too much separation in this society. In the third world you know all your neighbors and everyone is closer. You can be the shyest man over there and some girl would find a way to have your shlong in her.
@ubuu7
@ubuu7 Жыл бұрын
The solution is clear. Find your peers, turn gay, and have an orgy.
@SabiAll
@SabiAll Жыл бұрын
42 yo f here. never been in a relationship. took me a long time to get over it. realized that childhood traumas directly impact how I experience intimacy. found happiness (as happy as it goes) in my friends and career. Thank you for sharing your story and laying yourself bare. We need more guys and gals like you. may I add that you have gorgeous eyes?
@robertsmith987
@robertsmith987 Жыл бұрын
You are in his age bracket message him see how it goes
@rol407
@rol407 Жыл бұрын
Childhood affects intimacy sad. I look at intimacy something like immoral dark something to be ashamed or it hurt soul or how would I sleep at night I owing the evil have done
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 Жыл бұрын
May I ask why you never been in a relationship?
@JustMeeZZ
@JustMeeZZ 11 ай бұрын
Same here.
@steve8803
@steve8803 Жыл бұрын
Sounds like depression and anxiety are taking a major toll on you. I can relate.
@morecheaper
@morecheaper Жыл бұрын
Likewise
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Жыл бұрын
Dude no one cares about the pity party offer him some advice we need men. Strong men with a will to make the future better alone or not there is a reward to be bestowed upon you for your actions.
@steve8803
@steve8803 Жыл бұрын
@@AzamatSlowedAndReverb I am in the same situation as him. For me to give him advice would be akin to a broke person giving financial advice. You sound like you're close to perfect, you'd be the better one to offer up advice.
@INTELLIGENCE_Revolution
@INTELLIGENCE_Revolution Жыл бұрын
Whatever Georgi. He’s just observing that he may have depression/anxiety. It’s sometimes helpful to kindly let him know because someone who’s experiencing symptoms may not realise that’s what’s happening.
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Жыл бұрын
@@steve8803 I offered advice and not perfect but it's from someone with a will to change something that is clearly wrong and a growing issue other people just congregate and don't say anything of value like come on there's a way
@jamesrogers8527
@jamesrogers8527 Жыл бұрын
ASD has made me a ghost, haunting various locations and revisiting places pointlessly. The point you make about younger family members having families while you are left behind resonated strongly with me. I feel pathetic and I'm too ashamed to see my extended family very often.
@KyleGutz
@KyleGutz Жыл бұрын
Yeah I feel you. I'm the oldest child. And I'm still at home. Watching brothers and sisters have kids and get married. I am happy for them aswell. But I see how they look at me with pity all the time. It hurts so much.
@Brokebeauty247
@Brokebeauty247 Жыл бұрын
@@KyleGutz oh my goodness. My heart breaks hearing this. I know these days people make fun of Christians, but Jesus is real. He loves you more than you can imagine and He can change your life! All you have to do is ask Him to. Please try. Just say, "Jesus, if you are real, I want to know you. Will you show me who you are?" That's it. He will blow your mind.
@thisisme3238
@thisisme3238 Жыл бұрын
@@Brokebeauty247 Good advice Emily. God bless you for caring and sharing with others. 🙏
@outofthebox9913
@outofthebox9913 Жыл бұрын
Hey don’t feel that way. I was alone for a very long time and one day I met my wife and I’ve been married almost 14 years now and I never ever thought I would say that. You never know what might happen but no matter what don’t feel bad about yourself just try to enjoy your lives as much as possible.
@7yep4336dfgvvh
@7yep4336dfgvvh Жыл бұрын
​@@KyleGutzyou don't need family
@kostadindimitrov864
@kostadindimitrov864 Жыл бұрын
35 and I feel absolutely the same . I've been on so many weddings but nothing . Little confidence you have disappear in time . Most of my friends are with kids after longterm relationships and I am by myself . Its definitely painful and honestly fault is mine . I was not brave enough to do the first steps . Feel you , mate . Stay strong !
@yuribezmenovthegreat4705
@yuribezmenovthegreat4705 10 ай бұрын
Even if you do the fking first steps you get through blades and nails against you everyday. I don't think noone experienced what I did, although many as you experienced the same result, I mean THE SAME no relation, no conversation nothing. Like you don't even exist.
@huntersdman6
@huntersdman6 2 ай бұрын
This guy is explaining exactly what I'm going through as a 28 year old male, and im not half as attractive as he is, so what hope do I have? I cant live like this and just take the pain thinkinking it'll get better when im older. It'll only get worse...I've tried so very hard to improve myself, physically its worked, but it never boosted my confidence and it wont ever be enough because I cant cure my autism. If I'm broken on such a fundamental level then why shouldnt I just end it? I never stood a chance.
@chachi_arcola
@chachi_arcola Жыл бұрын
I haven't been diagnosed with autism, however I'm 50 and in the same social/romantic boat you're in. I feel this SO hard. No clue what's wrong with me. I'm decent looking, kind, enjoy good laughs, and perpetually alone. Always alone. Many similarities to you: small empty apartment, feeling like just existing, failed dating app experiences, never married, no kids, friends all with families and homes. Nothing improves. No companionship. No hope of a real life. My existence is inconsequential. It's lonely and it sucks harder than I'd ever imagined
@vespers119
@vespers119 Жыл бұрын
I mean... Why are you defining the meaning of your whole life by a romantic relationship? You can do better than that.
@intrepidsouls
@intrepidsouls Жыл бұрын
Having a relationship is not a cure. It can either make your life better, but also make you as miserable as it can be.
@ripbeni6198
@ripbeni6198 Жыл бұрын
You are destined for something greater man. When you were born a crown was made for you in heaven. Christ lets you share in His victory. Go to the catholic Church, it's a hospital for all those seeking a cure.
@nashwan888
@nashwan888 Жыл бұрын
I am in the same boat and feel down and reflect all the time.
@AK-vs9nr
@AK-vs9nr Жыл бұрын
Im 26 and also high functioning. Girls always thought i was attractive enough to approach me and engage... but SOCIETY ITSELF is so rotten, the relationship dinamic is so MESSED UP and TOXIC, that you HAVE TO BE CRAZY to be normal nowadays, sir!! All my friends of the same age have relationships and is one fight after the other, cheating, gossip, toxicity, etc, etc... If you think you are on the wrong path, FORGET THAT. Go explore, hiking, sports, gardening, plant a fruit orchard, etc...
@jamesb8305
@jamesb8305 Жыл бұрын
I'm 46, and you described my life to a tee. I truly feel your pain, and appreciate this video.. Stay strong brothers.
@BleakeACE15
@BleakeACE15 Жыл бұрын
I’m 27 and I would totally hang out with you man and listen to you, bro. :( You are more than good enough you’re a pretty awesome guy just by seeing this video your soul is evident.
@ardemach
@ardemach 4 ай бұрын
😵😵‍💫😑​@@Reeeeeee12345
@Agent56000
@Agent56000 2 ай бұрын
@@Reeeeeee12345and why would you ask that ?
@Agent56000
@Agent56000 2 ай бұрын
@@Reeeeeee12345 toss his salad ? Which means licking his waste dispenser?
@dawnholland8663
@dawnholland8663 Жыл бұрын
You’re the big brother making this video, helping countless others who have ASD! Thank you
@jamaican_cute_gal3427
@jamaican_cute_gal3427 Жыл бұрын
I just turned 45, and I’ve been divorced for 15 years. I’ve been socially awkward my whole life, and I feel like I just don’t relate to a majority of people. Myself and millions of others are going through your same struggles, you are not alone.
@themorningson
@themorningson Жыл бұрын
why don't you reach out to this guy and be a friend to him? Talk to him, he wants female companionship, you'll be a lifeline to this guy. you'll help him more than you'll ever know.
@joeroot9142
@joeroot9142 Жыл бұрын
@@themorningson not that easy.
@shaneh5494
@shaneh5494 Жыл бұрын
@@joeroot9142 please explain
@josep6528
@josep6528 Жыл бұрын
Women can get sex and companionship wayyyy faster than a man can. She's being selective. Lol
@f.taylor
@f.taylor Жыл бұрын
@@josep6528 The problem with your logic is "getting" those things. We don't want to get those things from women, and most women don't want to get those things from us. The average person is not interested in what they can get from their person but who they are. I know many women who simply struggle to socialize. Having men throwing themselves lustily is not what these women want either. They want lasting bonds with another man but struggle to socialize. Some humans just struggle with this part of life. edit: if you ask me to write a long research paper, I can be done before midnight. But if you ask me to approach someone, or really commit to conversation, it becomes painstakingly anxiety-inducing and difficult. It's frustrating but happens for both sexes.
@adamcaine9640
@adamcaine9640 Жыл бұрын
Not even blowing smoke dude, you’re a catch. First impression before I even knew what the video was about, I thought, this is a good looking guy, good style, great voice, articulate, looks like he has a nice place. Sounds like you take care of yourself and have hobbies and interests. Not divorced, no kids, no baggage. You’re a catch my man. I am certain there are good women out there that would be l happy to find a guy like you. I know it can be difficult to find them, especially as you get older. I just wanted to give you an outsider perspective on the fact that you come across as a catch. I hope maybe that little confidence boost leads to you finding the one.
@Riosgirl98
@Riosgirl98 Жыл бұрын
Wonderful comment from one gentleman to another 🧡
@beewills9492
@beewills9492 Жыл бұрын
Exactly my thoughts as well!
@CobraR1993
@CobraR1993 Жыл бұрын
American women are attracted to either very rich men or thugs/bums. Average men are not wanted.
@Pugetwitch
@Pugetwitch Жыл бұрын
As a female I must say his voice is weak and I was going to comment that he should work on that. I'm autistic and I cannot stand soft-spoken voices!
@MrWaterbugdesign
@MrWaterbugdesign Жыл бұрын
Yes, there's someone for everyone. There's a greeting card that says so. BUT, and this is a huge BUTT, finding that person is becoming increasingly difficult. Online has pushed the paradox of choice to be a serious issue. We can always do better, so we keep looking. Everyone is searching way beyond our means. It's a serious mess. But US men have other options. There are really great women all over the world wanting to marry/partner with US men. I thought it was a scam, gold diggers, wanting a green card but have been researching for 4 years now and it's 100% legit. Yes there are scammers too, but many great women. They don't give a crap if you stim, have meltdowns, have odd interests, short, fat, handsome or ugly. What they care about: #1 You're a provider. They don't say this openly but they're just like women everywhere, The difference is $600/mo USD is a provider in most of SE Asia. $1000/mo is well to do. They don't actually seem to care about how much though. To them a guy with a lot of money is a problem for most because someone will steal him away. However, they will stay with a guy when money goes away at least sometimes. But you do have to try. #2 You're loyal. This is what they say is #1 and it's super important to them. Apparently what's going on is that men in SE Asia, Columbia, Brazil are cheating a lot and the women are stick of it. There's also a lot of alcohol drinking. #3 Kind, honest. That's their entire requirement list. These women are very attractive and age gap doesn't matter. They can fall in love hard very fast because you're such high status just by being an American. They will chat for hours everyday, several times a day for more than 2 years hoping you will move to be with her. Most do not want to move to the US, but will if you want. Once in the US there can be problems as American women tell them "you can do better" and they get a lot of attention from many men. It can change them into American women. The dating site thing is flipped upside down. You'll get swamped with Likes and messages. The paradox of choice will now be a problem for you. You'll see the problem US women are having. Getting 100 women messaging in a week is actually a problem. How do to pick? You start doing the same as US women, increasing your requirements. Soon none will be good enough. Gotta keep your head. Find a good solid woman who adores you.
@LanceUppercut78
@LanceUppercut78 Жыл бұрын
You are one of the youngest looking 44 year olds I've ever seen in my entire life! You absolutely have that going for you. Don't give up, you have plenty to offer someone.
@ykonratev
@ykonratev Жыл бұрын
he can literally find a college grad and it wouldnt even look weird lol
@jenovaproject2356
@jenovaproject2356 Жыл бұрын
I needed this right now. Thank you. Your not alone buddy keep going.
@Ginger_Prince
@Ginger_Prince Жыл бұрын
Hey Aaron, my name is Tyler. I just came across this video on my recommended feed. Holy crap, this hit home for me. I am 37, single, no kids, and haven't been in a relationship with any women in over 10 years. I struggle with a lot of mental health issues mainly with substance abuse. Long story shot, I got addicted to heroin, oxy, and cocaine in 2011. I have had a couple relapses, but as of right now I have over 7 months clean off of heroin and cocaine/crack. I know God has a bigger purpose for me in life, and I know He does for you too. Hang in there man! I commend you for being so raw and real.
@user-pq9vr1uh4g
@user-pq9vr1uh4g Жыл бұрын
Keep up the good work.
@Ginger_Prince
@Ginger_Prince Жыл бұрын
@@user-pq9vr1uh4g Thank you William, I appreciate it!
@lordfizzz
@lordfizzz Жыл бұрын
Tyler keep it up! It's been 2 decades of me trying to get it right, but any semblance of normality in my life boils down to my abstinence! So glad to hear of your journey, stick to it!
@erinmarie1334
@erinmarie1334 Жыл бұрын
thats an amazing accomplishment! You should be very proud of yourself, that shows real strength. Many people just give up, but you're still going. everyone has slip ups on the road to recovery but as long as you get back up, you're doing it! congratulations and I hope you make all your dreams in this life come true, live with zero regrets and remember everything is an experience and a lesson in life.
@pizzelle2
@pizzelle2 Жыл бұрын
That is so awesome, keep it up. Congratulations. I'm in recovery myself. Even in the times when we're alone and searching for companionship etc we're still so much better off than we ever were while using. I don't ever want to go back there. Let's just keep pushing forward!
@jhavajoe3792
@jhavajoe3792 Жыл бұрын
By the time I was In my 50's, I met half a dozen guys who were divorced, paid child support, lost homes, horror stories of misery, etc. There's some worst things out there, than being single. That goes for the older single women too. Some suffer in long marriages.
@TrynUrLuck
@TrynUrLuck Жыл бұрын
Exactly, people can fuck you over beyond belief it's not all shits and giggles like he thinks.
@LeftLeftRightRight16
@LeftLeftRightRight16 Жыл бұрын
@James Trill There is more to an "ideal life" than having a relationship and getting married. If anything I would argue that people who stay single longer have more opportunities to go out and chase the things they love without having to make compromises for somebody else. Just because somebody stays single (whether voluntary or involuntary) doesn't mean they don't do anything with their life.
@poms_beats
@poms_beats Жыл бұрын
Yeah I was just about to say this. Grass isn't always greener on the other side. Best to love what you have and work through your challenges however hard it might seem. I'm 35 f single, live alone and maybe it's cause I'm an introvert but I like it compared to the horror stories I hear from married couples. Even the happy ones have problems I wouldn't want to deal with. I'm ok with my problems. I'm ok to work through them. I'm grateful for whatever good I have. I didn't used to feel like that but I've come to it. I've come to realize everyone has their own set of issues and contentment comes from acceptance of the circumstances and action steps toward improvement.
@doms9471
@doms9471 Жыл бұрын
@R4iderSc4vver haha bro thinks he funny
@kite6864
@kite6864 Жыл бұрын
problem is those of us that haven't had normal relationships then get these left overs that had failed relationships... it feels awkward to date someone with kids, who's been married when I barely have any dating experience myself. Their adult children often have their sh!t together better than I do
@puddincup9879
@puddincup9879 Жыл бұрын
Much respect and empathy to all of you for being open. I can relate for sure!
@ksrhys-
@ksrhys- Жыл бұрын
This was one of the deeper and sadder things I've witnessed on KZbin, and that's a really beautiful thing that I'm inspired by you for sharing. I have no doubt it doesn't feel particularly virtuous in any way but the fact you can make people feel something deeply real to the nature of existence (no person will ever truly know what it's like to be another) is beautiful and you should be very proud of that you were brave enough to make it through this video and put it out there. It makes a lot of us feel less alone, too. I think you hold yourself to a lot of expectations society instills, and maybe via that, or maybe inherently to you, developing a serious relationship sounds really important to you. This is probably a 'no shit, sherlock' kind of thing to say. It makes sense, but I would just be wary of that first part, that society has formed what is normal to you in your brain and you seek that normal life. I don't know much about ASD, but my general guideline in life is to question normalcy - just because it's commonplace doesn't mean it's the correct thing or even what you truly like deep down. I watched my parents divorce dissolve and no doubt I'll pursue love and connection, but very likely with the caveat of avoiding married life. I'd also recommend (you've probably tried this) but dating other people with autism, I imagine there's an app or site for it (again, no idea, you might have mentioned it in this video and it just flew by me) - but it seems to me everyone you have crossed paths with doesn't fully get your existence and i think it would be a huge, huge relief finding someone who does, whether they have autism or they grew up with someone who had it, etc. I feel like that would be the biggest weight off your shoulders. Even if it didn't amount in a relationship, but just knowing you're not alone in the circumstances you're in. I have my own mental situation I'm navigating and I used to beat myself up a lot about it and feel extremely bleak about it, but it was realising just how truly not-alone I am that took the most weight off my mind. I'd definitely recommend pursuing any and every community and connection that knows in some way what a life with ASD looks like. I really think it'll help to at best meet and/or communicate with, or at worst observe, as many others as possible who know to some more informed degree the circumstances you're living with. That aside, a good fundamental one I recommend a lot is acclaimed neuroscientist dudeman Sam Harris' guided meditation on KZbin. Just search 'sam harris meditation'. I owe a significant amount of my peace of mind in life to his very mechanical explanation of the brain and our experience of life, moment to moment. I wish you all the best, man. You seem like a lovely person. There is 100% a happy future out there for you, I think it just exists through finding the most understanding surroundings you can, as above. ✨
@abcdf7366
@abcdf7366 Жыл бұрын
I'm 31 and only been in 1 relationship. I married the only woman who accepted me for who I naturally was and she died of cancer. No one else has ever given me a chance and I just cope with the "better to have loved" mindset. It sucks because all my life I've always had to be 10x more confident, financially stable, funnier, etc. just to be visible (not as a partner just as a human). I was the fat blk ugly guy with a severe stuttering problem growing up and seeing dudes who would abuse, cheat, disrespect their women be able to get in and out of relationships just because they looked good or had "swag", has made me bitter about ever trying again. I'm not what they want, it's that simple
@happynapper1234
@happynapper1234 Жыл бұрын
that is really sad
@user-qe7bt9dz1l
@user-qe7bt9dz1l Жыл бұрын
😞
@jademusic1211
@jademusic1211 Жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry, hon'. Life isn't fair.😞💔❤️
@philipkung7261
@philipkung7261 Жыл бұрын
Just go work out and dress better. Go traveling and make new friends. That’ll solve all of your issues.
@co8539
@co8539 Жыл бұрын
You must love yourself first before anyone else can love you. Just keep going :)
@hensli
@hensli Жыл бұрын
125,000 views in 2 months, you resonated with a lot of people man. That’s something to feel good about, you put yourself out there and a lot of people found it and wanted to engage.
@DoableSine
@DoableSine Жыл бұрын
Almost 150k now
@Pugetwitch
@Pugetwitch Жыл бұрын
And from the looks of it the majority of them are attracted to this dude's page for the all the wrong reasons. I'm a 42 yo autistic woman, and I'm really disappointed. Didn't realize that I'd be walking into a war of the sexes over here with a bunch of angry men who hate women because they get rejected.
@mike20855
@mike20855 Жыл бұрын
yesterday his subscriber count was 5k something. now its 6.3k. i swear just the other day it was 4ksomething. his channel is growing quick
@tatongsrg
@tatongsrg Жыл бұрын
Men are waking up to the tinder situation.
@brianmeen2158
@brianmeen2158 Жыл бұрын
@@Pugetwitchyeah I have noticed that as well. I’m trying to steer guys away from the gender war but it’s hard. In all fairness, there are female creators that stir the pot as well .
@pacomeseguer6350
@pacomeseguer6350 Жыл бұрын
You´re a superhero in my eyes. This video is the push i needed today. Keep going
@PorterStephens
@PorterStephens Жыл бұрын
It for sure takes an insane amount of courage and strength to do what this guy has done here. You’re a really strong person man you can’t give up on believing in yourself brother.
@Karll541
@Karll541 Жыл бұрын
I’m really surprised that a good looking dude like this is in the predicament he’s in. Brutal world
@joeswanson733
@joeswanson733 Жыл бұрын
if aaron is struggling like this than anyone that's below him on the attractive scale... is basically doomed.
@Karll541
@Karll541 Жыл бұрын
@@joeswanson733 yeah basically. This goes to show you gotta cash in early. ‘Cause you can get left behind easy
@joeswanson733
@joeswanson733 Жыл бұрын
@@Karll541 we're seeing this right now playing out in real time with so many single unwed childless people now. and when i mean people i mean the men.
@joeswanson733
@joeswanson733 Жыл бұрын
@Vaga Bond i know. it makes sense too. like there can only be one. im quoting jet li in the movie the one lol
@whytho9891
@whytho9891 Жыл бұрын
It's over for us below average looking Bros
@BritonAD
@BritonAD Жыл бұрын
You'll wish you were lonely if married to the wrong person. That's a living hell.
@ericwright3798
@ericwright3798 Жыл бұрын
Bad part about being lonely is you can easily end up settling for the wrong person out of desperation. Then you just wish you could be lonely again.
@John-mj1kk
@John-mj1kk Жыл бұрын
I believe it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. For in loving and being loved, even if the love does not last, we can find value in ourselves and in our connection with another. To go through life without experiencing this connection, to feel invisible and alone, is a loneliness that cannot be easily borne.
@arkangelnorthman
@arkangelnorthman Жыл бұрын
AMEN!!!
@kpgYT02
@kpgYT02 Жыл бұрын
Okay thanks for putting a smile on my face with the Jack ass joke I love it
@kpgYT02
@kpgYT02 Жыл бұрын
Hope everything comes together for you I feel the same but not as deep as your story truly felt it
@MsAJChase
@MsAJChase Жыл бұрын
Your voice is so calming. Thank you for sharing this with us.
@Teexytee777
@Teexytee777 Жыл бұрын
Thanks for being this vulnerable. I feel so alone too. You sharing your story makes me feel less alone.
@kizzy2874
@kizzy2874 Жыл бұрын
I have suffered loneliness as an adult. I am a 38 yr old female that got moved around alot as a kid and struggles to make friends. Can I just say for anyone that is lonely I highly recommend a pet. I got a rough collie who is now 2 and she has honestly been so good for my mental health. I go on holidays with my dog and lots of hikes. There are even dog friendly cafes now, and she has helped me meet and start conversations with other dog owners etc. I now take care of her and she gives purpose and company. Alot better than some human friends I've had over the years. I would also recommend pursuing your passions, you will start to meet others on the same page with same interests as you. This will give natural topics to talk about.
@sarcodonblue2876
@sarcodonblue2876 Жыл бұрын
Dogs are the best and I prefer them to people.
@davidd1289
@davidd1289 Жыл бұрын
I disagree. I think we should do what this guy is doing here. Feel the pain of loneliness. Embrace it. Face life head on and go do something about it.
@davidd1289
@davidd1289 Жыл бұрын
I went through 10 years of what this guy is going through and overcame it and then some. Getting rid of my negativity and not numbing the pain of life saved me. God saved me
@ThanatosWings
@ThanatosWings Жыл бұрын
I second that, i got a pointer and my fur baby is my whole life. He's saved me for sure
@The3Shogun
@The3Shogun Жыл бұрын
Coping by getting an animal and hiding behind that is just masking the truth.
@theleague383
@theleague383 Жыл бұрын
Wow you don’t look a day over 30, keep having faith man. You got this Remember, its never too late for anything as long as you are breathing.
@eishawave3934
@eishawave3934 Жыл бұрын
That’s not enough.. he needs to be more confident. Looks like he has his own world setup, as well as his health and his looks so there’s no reason for him to not be confident (outside of autism which is very unfortunate).
@MrJaycrow30
@MrJaycrow30 Жыл бұрын
I totally felt everything you said. And it does get harder to find connections. Thank you for your openness and know you're not alone in how you feel... cheers
@Penispenis47
@Penispenis47 Жыл бұрын
I would like to say how much you inspired me with this video. Just by speaking about this and putting it out there is braver and more courageous than anything I have ever done. Thanks man.
@Somaticyoganurse
@Somaticyoganurse Жыл бұрын
I truly think the dating market is a joke and you are a gem ! So kind and authentic! I
@pricklycats
@pricklycats Жыл бұрын
You would swipe left on him on a dating site for sure. I have autism too and if he only got one date after 2 years there's something seriously off. I only got around 4 matches in a year when I was single and I thought that was bad. I guess being in my 20s helped but it wasn't easy and I had to do most of the work to get what I wanted (women don't make the first move, ever).
@thewewguy8t88
@thewewguy8t88 Жыл бұрын
Hey I have never get a match since trying out any app :/
@thewewguy8t88
@thewewguy8t88 Жыл бұрын
Pricklycats - yeah I mean most women would swipe left on most men/not respond to thier message at least they would not for me.
@spaghetto9836
@spaghetto9836 Жыл бұрын
What is with the MGTOW energy hiding in the replies of this comment section? Do y'all really have to feed on negativity 24/7? Loneliness is something most autists in general struggle with, not only men, & he clearly doesn't blame or antagonise women. Our whole generation has had the least sex and happiness, so please have some empathy.
@spaghetto9836
@spaghetto9836 Жыл бұрын
​@@pricklycats Hey Megamind, she said the dating market is a joke, so she clearly doesn't use dating apps due to understanding how superficial they are.
@saywhatnyc
@saywhatnyc Жыл бұрын
I’m going to be 41 and single. I’m not autistic but I can understand and relate to a lot of what you’re saying. It’s definitely harder to meet people friends, romantic prospects etc when you’re older. Just wanted to send positive energy … Platitudes don’t really do anything but you seem like a genuinely good guy and I hope you find an amazing woman for you.
@chriskramp5174
@chriskramp5174 Жыл бұрын
I feel exactly what Aaron is saying. Im about to be 40 and single also. Im not autistic either but i think at this point it might be better to be alone that bring in someone to your life that might bring more baggage and stress which is not good for our well being...but we can still hope that we meet that right person eventually.
@Beastmaster1221
@Beastmaster1221 Жыл бұрын
@@chriskramp5174 being single and content is so crucial brother
@PatrolTard
@PatrolTard Жыл бұрын
This video is gonna get him some dates for sure.
@conde_bathory
@conde_bathory Жыл бұрын
@@PatrolTard Hopefully
@jdf3972
@jdf3972 Жыл бұрын
one of the most relatable KZbin videos I've watched in a long while, thankyou Aaron
@bambooforrests
@bambooforrests Жыл бұрын
I'm grateful that I discovered your channel, Aaron. Thank you for being so brave to share your story and life with those who identify with you. I am pushing 40, and I have undiagnosed ASD, though I am certain that I am on the spectrum, because I have struggled with so many things throughout my life. I only have one friend, who I have known since second grade, and I can't help but think he still chooses to be my friend because he feels sorry for me that I am not "normal." He has managed to build a career, life and family of his own. I have not been able to do any of those things, so we grow farther apart as our lives continue to misalign with age. Sometimes, I do feel alone, but that is often the life of those on the spectrum. We are simply not understood nor completely accepted by most people. I don't feel alone knowing that there are genuine, good-natured people like you that I can relate to. All my best to you. Your friend, Daniel
@scyntheachannel
@scyntheachannel Жыл бұрын
As a 25 year old female on the spectrum, I've been having similar thoughts to yourself. Many women and men feel this way. You are not alone. You have many things in your favor. This video I think is a big step for you. I'll be praying for you, and all our future success in this department.
@lennertvermeir7498
@lennertvermeir7498 Жыл бұрын
I'm also 25 and let me tell you, approaching is hard af for me...
@dimitrytimothee1590
@dimitrytimothee1590 Жыл бұрын
@@lennertvermeir7498 Same man as a 17 year old it's really hard😔
@rltelite9090
@rltelite9090 Жыл бұрын
@@dimitrytimothee1590 WORK OUT HIT THE GYM CHANGE UR MENTALITY STOP THE VICTIM COMPLEX
@xpallodoc1147
@xpallodoc1147 Жыл бұрын
You could get with this guy and have a family
@fritzblob
@fritzblob Жыл бұрын
@@rltelite9090 oh well that’s useful Mr CAPITAL LETTERS !
@davidthornton1539
@davidthornton1539 Жыл бұрын
I'm 55 and completely alone. Everywhere I go, I look at EVERYONE'S ring finger and wonder how each person met their husband or wife. I feel like a shell of a man. I've also tried dating apps. I gave my all. I finally gave up. The dating sites only added pain to my fighting clinical depression. I feel your pain so deeply. Watching your video has made me cry uncontrollably. God bless you!!!!
@justmeeh2183
@justmeeh2183 Жыл бұрын
The way modern women are, you're not missing much. Majority have a high body count, and as a result, they can't pair-bond. I choose to be single, and be as self-sufficient as possible. They're not worth the headache. Anyways, hang in there brother.
@sarcodonblue2876
@sarcodonblue2876 Жыл бұрын
@@justmeeh2183 modern men start watching pornography at age 10 and can't commit and only talk to women when they want sex. They don't want relationships but to be in control and women want partnerships and not to be subordinate.
@justmeeh2183
@justmeeh2183 Жыл бұрын
@@sarcodonblue2876 That's not what the dating statistics, cheating statistics, and divorce rates show.
@sarcodonblue2876
@sarcodonblue2876 Жыл бұрын
@@justmeeh2183 do you really think men are going to look into watching pornography when they probably still watch it themselves? Men don't want to hear that getting aroused over it is not good for themselves and especially women. It is easy to observe these things but I guess men don't notice as the power to pleasure themselves is too high. I guess you have to be a women who has been sexaully harassed or worse.
@justmeeh2183
@justmeeh2183 Жыл бұрын
@@sarcodonblue2876 You make absolutely no sense. You're just defensive about what I stated, and posting based on pure emotions. No one here brought up xx movies, nor is it relevant to this topic.
@whitehawk3776
@whitehawk3776 Жыл бұрын
You are NOT ALONE. I am right there too. 41 and nothing to show for my life. Some of the most brilliant minds and amazing people that ever lived never paired up and had children. I wish I could help you. Don’t give up. Never give up.
@joslynch4924
@joslynch4924 Жыл бұрын
Your story reminds me of one of my all time favorite songs "Being Alive" from the stage musical, Company. Never fails to make me tear up. Thank you for sharing your story.
@drinks_menu
@drinks_menu Жыл бұрын
This is the most relatable video I’ve ever seen. Every single point reflects my own experience.
@Jcremo
@Jcremo Жыл бұрын
You’ve vocalised my biggest fear for my son who was diagnosed with ASD. He’s good looking and gentle in his own way. He doesn’t know how to relate. It’s like everyone expects him to speak a foreign language that most of us are able to observe and imitate from birth. He’s never had friends, his siblings only just tolerate him. I don’t know what adulthood will look like for him. I see his troubles and make time to explain things that he should know, but the world won’t make time for him as he grows.
@philipthomson1981
@philipthomson1981 Жыл бұрын
I worry for my daughter. I hope she can learn to tell the difference between genuine people and those that will just take advantage of her. It’s a hard enough for someone who isn’t disadvantaged to achieve that with what I’ve observed in my experience.
@NeanderthalDogma
@NeanderthalDogma Жыл бұрын
Dont worry he will adapt in his own way let life happen
@Kwildcat13
@Kwildcat13 Жыл бұрын
I think the world will the more people talk about this . Have faith that people will learn from this
@RyanMcPhern
@RyanMcPhern Жыл бұрын
This dude is a legend for sharing this
@fredo3816
@fredo3816 Жыл бұрын
36 and facing the same shit but of trauma and ptsd ; Thanks for telling your story ! comforting that I'm not alone in this
@billydinkman4918
@billydinkman4918 Жыл бұрын
I think you having the courage to come out and be open and honest about this will inadvertently change your life for the better. From what I gather, you're a talented, driven dude with more going on for you than you think. You're life is just beginning. Stay strong
@brianwaller7383
@brianwaller7383 Жыл бұрын
I once had a coworker that dated, got engaged, married, divorced, dated and got girlfriend ALL while I got one single date that led nowhere.
@pira707
@pira707 Жыл бұрын
I know a young woman ( like 23-24 ) get married then get divorced and instantly found a boyfriend and is already engaged lol. She's fat and really not that attractive either
@Karll541
@Karll541 Жыл бұрын
Brutal
@mrforbes1750
@mrforbes1750 Жыл бұрын
Relationships and dating has changed. Its now a global game due to social media. On top of that due to women getting mass atention due to social media a lot have decided to monetise themself. He can go to latin america or asia and be top of the food chain. Sitting in america wont fix it it will only get worse.
@Krul6
@Krul6 Жыл бұрын
I haven't been on a date in 8 years, both of my nieces have been created in that time period and their both going to primary school
@alexanderkirilov7820
@alexanderkirilov7820 Жыл бұрын
@@Krul6 and who’s fault do you think that is? (IT IS NOT a loaded question, genuinely asking to see what you think)
@brootal4234
@brootal4234 Жыл бұрын
Jeezuz, you described myself at the beginning. I’ve been living on cope for the past several decades. In my 20s I was still hopeful because I always thought that there were still possibilities. When I struck out, I worked on what I thought was wrong with me which was weight, fitness, finances, hairstyle and clothing. In my 30s, I felt a little disappointed because I thought I would’ve met someone by then. Women still said no or they would ghost me. So I kept working on myself. I had a decent job and career. I had my own place, car and could afford to go on trips. In my 40s I noticed a change. Women would look away when I was near them. I would try to start a conversation but would be ignored. Sometimes I would be patronized. Or insulted. One woman just cut me off when I asked how her day was. I later realized that I was having trouble because I was ugly and short. Getting older only made things worse. The belief that women go for older men only works if you’re James Bond. It doesn’t work for ugly short men. You at least are good looking. No homo. And you’re fit. Some of my married friends have let themselves go and look like blobs of skin, but their wives still stick with them. Maybe there’s something to finding love early and growing old with them that makes their love stronger, I don’t know. All I can say is that be thankful you still have relatives you can celebrate the holidays and birthdays with. I celebrated my birthday by going out to Olive Garden after work. In my head, I sang happy birthday to myself as I sat in a booth by myself. I tried to look happy or at least casually comfortable so as to not creep people out. But it gets harder. I can’t tell you what I did for the past several Christmases because they were all spent by myself and the memories have faded or melded together because there was nothing significant that stood out. The funniest moments in my life are when people try to give me advice on obvious routes I could take. They act like they’re the first ones who came up with working out, making money and taking trips to live a better life. Not once do they consider that I’ve already done all those things. I’ve volunteered at homeless shelters and hospitals to get my mind off of myself but that can only work for so long. It got to a point where I was depressing the homeless even if I was trying to be optimistic about life. Volunteering at the hospital had its positive moments, but it gets negated when the nurses treat you like a leper and then talk behind your back. Also, since I would volunteer for several hours sometimes, I would have lunch at the cafeteria on occasion. The doctors and nurses who would put on a smile when we were up on the ward would act like they didn’t know me in the cafeteria. It felt like high school all over again which is silly since I was in my 40s. The other thing I would see was all the families and couples that got together to have lunch. It reminded me that even if someone is feeling ill, they at least have someone to visit them and make their life a little less dreary. Volunteering only got more depressing for me so I eventually quit.
@camelcasee
@camelcasee Жыл бұрын
"the memories have faded or melded together because there was nothing significant that stood out" This one is super brutal.
@tommasogiuffrida
@tommasogiuffrida Жыл бұрын
how tall are you?
@Karll541
@Karll541 Жыл бұрын
Yes, you described what I’m experiencing to the tee and much better than I ever could
@parrtysuz87
@parrtysuz87 Жыл бұрын
I feel you! Hope God will bless you with the right partner In my hometown we have huge statistic gap between men and women, for one man over 20 women, so we are leading by the most loneliness women in the world. Maybe to try dating app to connect with some Russian speaking women? Some speak English, as there is a huge gap between men and women there, there is a chance to find a good women from there. :( Ps as men have there many choices they behave with us rude and abusev...
@orthodoxcaveman5819
@orthodoxcaveman5819 Жыл бұрын
Recent life hack people have been talking about: get a sex doll, a good group of friends and a house maid. Congratulations, you just replaced a woman. If you want a family though, you'll have to go through surrogacy, but there's a lot of men going that route, so there will always be info on this topic online. If you need to vent out, we're bro.
@henrypage8951
@henrypage8951 Жыл бұрын
Keep up the good work with your channel, my man. Having the courage to talk about these things and vent is a damn good thing 💪💪💪💪💪 You are a rare example of someone using the internet for a good reason
@AlienAmerican
@AlienAmerican 6 ай бұрын
Thank you for the candidness and honesty.
@JDLuke
@JDLuke Жыл бұрын
I know this was hard to do. It was hard to watch. I echo the sentiment expressed already. You are worthy, and you are loved by people who have never met you. By putting this video out there for people to find, discuss, and connect over, your impact on the world has been a positive one. Thank you on behalf of humanity.
@brianmeen2158
@brianmeen2158 Жыл бұрын
Nice do you have advice for him ? I’m similar to him and share many of the same struggles but I can get into relationships but just get little out of them .. he seems unable to find a woman that will accept his nature ..
@bohrora2293
@bohrora2293 Жыл бұрын
@@brianmeen2158 there are tons of women out there he just have to get out of the US. This guy is a joke. And deservers to get nothing out of life by acting out like this.
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb
@AzamatSlowedAndReverb Жыл бұрын
@@brianmeen2158 dude I am asking the same thing but you'll get these comments that are pity party bs with hundreds of likes. We need men with a will and a passion not to make money but to make the world better whether they are alone on the path or not, many rewards will be bestowed upon those who seek to create order and stability for humanity. Those who wish to destroy or sit and watch will only lose themselves in the end
@Kavaitsu
@Kavaitsu Жыл бұрын
@@AzamatSlowedAndReverb absolutely. Denmo, Men's Maxxing, Dre Drexler (and Hamza) all have discords for men to talk about topics like these and you are all welcome. Just be prepared to face the truth
@samigolden399
@samigolden399 Жыл бұрын
I completely relate to this even though I'm not living with ASD. Just a 44 yr old woman. Thank you for sharing, I actually didn't think there were others like me.
@SonOftheBattleCry
@SonOftheBattleCry Жыл бұрын
You should make it happen and meet him In real life
@noneofyourbusiness910
@noneofyourbusiness910 Жыл бұрын
Hey man. Thanks for posting this video. I'm only 32 and I struggle with loneliness as well. I've also never been in a serious relationship with a woman. I hope that changes soon and I am trying my best to change the situation, but it does get tough. Much love and care sent you're way. You are not alone!
@thebattler5478
@thebattler5478 Жыл бұрын
Greetings from Australia. I'm also 44 with ASD - I was diagnosed as an adult. I also used to suffer from depression & anxiety. Thank you for posting this video - at least I know I'm not the only one. I've watched all your other videos on this channel & can relate. There are plenty of single women out there who would be glad to be with someone like you - maybe the problem is distance. You're not past your prime - you're just getting started. And thank you for your honesty - never thought I'd come across a video like this. All the best.
@Pault3788
@Pault3788 Жыл бұрын
I'm 62 without ever having a girlfriend or relationship, I've learned to accept it and try to be happy by myself
@lhomme444
@lhomme444 Жыл бұрын
At what age you accepted it and how hard it was for you?
@Pault3788
@Pault3788 Жыл бұрын
@@lhomme444 20,it's more sad than hard
@trevors2841
@trevors2841 Жыл бұрын
That hurts to hear Drew, I wish you love in another life :/
@Pault3788
@Pault3788 Жыл бұрын
@@trevors2841 Thank you
@judgeholder8112
@judgeholder8112 Жыл бұрын
@@Pault3788 do you have any hobbies or a job that keeps you busy?
@robslams2324
@robslams2324 Жыл бұрын
You are strong as hell for explaining this without showing much pain. Respect man.
@blockminingsolutions
@blockminingsolutions Жыл бұрын
That does nothing to help him. Crying for help can get attention.. hopefully some ppl reach out that can aid in fixing his issues. He’s clearly having self esteem issues. If he’s so tired of being alone, it is his choice to be alone. How many women does he talk to per day, how many does he even try and attempt to making relationships? It’s zero. He’s not doing anything about it but he’s crying that he doesn’t like his situation, it’s quite insane. If he’s aware of it, then he should become aware that he’s creating the issue himself by life choices and habits. Perhaps he needs to get on some testosterone therapy and lift weights… it will transform his mental attitude and self esteem.. end self depressed attitudes etc
@tittat9351
@tittat9351 Жыл бұрын
It would be okay even if he did show some pain. Sometimes it just comes out unplanned anyway for people.
@JamesGaming257
@JamesGaming257 Жыл бұрын
@@blockminingsolutions I honestly get where you’re coming from, a lot of men do simply have trouble letting go of the nihilism and sadness that is just unneeded. But honestly if this many men are feeling this way now then it’s really not as simple as you make it out to be. We need to let go off this testosterone bullshit and start finding some solutions because no offence but it doesn’t help.
@portman8909
@portman8909 Жыл бұрын
@@JamesGaming257 It's rejection and not being wanted when you try for many.
@rob-123
@rob-123 Жыл бұрын
I suggest he does the following, take a lot of fish oils and healthy diet to feed the brain. Then start drinking really good quilty expresso, without milk as it stops the benefits. Coffee is a neuro blocker and forces the brain to rewire this is why you see so many people chatting away when having it. It's important he surrounds himself with people and takes control of the conversations in a good way while on the espresso. Over time this will force his brain to change into a more open way with people.
@CoolSmek
@CoolSmek Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing yourself with us, I think it's extremely valuable to hear about the experience you've had. I relate heavily to your struggles and it makes me feel grateful for the family connections I still have. I also have 2 younger brothers (I'm also the oldest brother) who are in serious relationships while I remain alone. I think I have issues with making decisions, I lock up. It's like I'd rather keep everything the same than risk it and try new things, even though I'm burning to get more experience with romantic relationships... I just feel stuck.
@parkyercarcass
@parkyercarcass Жыл бұрын
i'm 33, completely reclusive, and completely isolated, haven't been on a date since before covid, and haven't been in a real relationship since college age. i reinstalled tinder this week, and it's just a monument to how alone i always have been. everyone my age has kids or partners or are just getting out of long term relationships. how can i hang with people who are so much more "advanced" than i am in terms of emotional and relational experience? i don't like thinking that the people i have most in common with on that app are the younger women who have less experience. that feels fucking predatory even though it isn't. i know this kind of isolation is going to continue. isolation is going to be my future. thanks for sharing. i guess if feels good to know i'm not alone in my alone-ness.
@FeyPax
@FeyPax Жыл бұрын
I’ve said this in my own comment, but no one needs to know about the successes or not of your past relationships. I know it may weigh on you but no one can tell just by looking at someone. Also my bf was 31 when we got together and we met through friends. He also thought he’d be reclusive the rest of his life after a terrible break up in his early 20’s. I’m not saying tinder can’t be useful but I think life changes when we least expect it. Keep investing in you and your hobbies and branching out trying to make friends in the unlikeliest of places. I do believe that people find each other but it takes that initiative to just hold on for dear life. Also people move, die, become distant, life doesn’t just stagnate for people. Friend groups change and evolve and who knows if you find yourself in one. We just welcomed a new friend into our group where this is their FIRST irl friend group and they’re almost 30. My point is life is so dynamic and you never know what’s out there. This is also coming from someone with autism and severe depression so trust me I KNOW how fucking terrible life is and can get. But you never know who’s life you can change. Kudos on putting yourself out there.
@sudershelly1
@sudershelly1 Жыл бұрын
Hi Aaron. I’m watching this with tears running down my face. I hope making this video helped make you feel better. You’ve articulated a lot of what I’m feeling right now.
@UChallengeTV
@UChallengeTV Жыл бұрын
I'm 28 and I related to this so deeply. Thank you for making me feel a little less alone in this world.
@robertfinch6602
@robertfinch6602 Жыл бұрын
I’m 28 too!
@ninthcircleIX01MM
@ninthcircleIX01MM Жыл бұрын
Me too !
@cyairati
@cyairati Жыл бұрын
28 can't say the same wake up stop feeling sorry for yourself and start talking to people. You will get rejected a million times but you will always eventually get to know people and the more you do it the more you level up.
@UChallengeTV
@UChallengeTV Жыл бұрын
@@cyairatiHey I just wanted to say to keep your opinions to yourself about someone without knowing their life story. I have autism and have a hard time talking to people because of it which is why I resonated with his story. I also have an autoimmune disorder which causes my hands and sometimes body to shake and it can be pretty off puting to other people who don't know me with first impressions. You say stop feeling sorry for yourself but I didn't say I do. I also live in a town of less than 10,000 people so talking to 1 million people like you suggested is not really possible. In fact I'd love to know how you physically talked to 1 million people because that's cool. When I said "feeling a little less alone" I was talking about the problem with autism. I don't have a lot of people in my social life that know how hard it can be sometimes so it was nice listening to someone talk about it. By the way I have had girlfriends although short lived. Also telling people to just go talk to someone is not terrible advice but very poor advice. Not everyone has the confidence that maybe you have or expect people to just have naturally.
@cyairati
@cyairati Жыл бұрын
@@UChallengeTV This is out in public so it's normal to hear everyone's opinion. The question at the end of the day is (What are you getting outta this?) (What is the solution?) I think there is probably one that I can think of witch is to hopefully raise awareness and hope people change and that isn't easy the time this will take let alone 💀... I might not know about his life that much or yours regardless it doesn't mean you know about his just because you relate in someway doesn't make your situation alike. All I am saying is as a man you gotta pick yourself up and find a way because no one other than your parents got you. You are 28 yeah ok so what is the solution? The city you live in has 10k people out the 10k how many girls are around your age whom are single and ready for a relationship? The number is very little yeah thinking about it as time passes it will keep getting harder and harder🤔...
@TheBeatSmash
@TheBeatSmash Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing this. I feel the same way sometimes. I don't know if I'm Autistic but I never fit in regular society because I actually spoke what was on my mind, which caused the majority of people, who are liars and living in a lie to hate me.
@Joshdifferent
@Joshdifferent 3 ай бұрын
Aye, I’m 28 and I think I’m on the spectrum but not sure. But when I look back on my life, I’m like hmmm… maybe I’m autistic. I’m currently a-loner living in California.
@MrLivewire1970
@MrLivewire1970 Жыл бұрын
I'm 52 and single no children. It's not the life I thought I'd be living but I enjoy my life now. I make my own rules and I don't care what people think of me. If they are negative, I remove them from my life.
@grazie-dc6we
@grazie-dc6we Жыл бұрын
Hell yeah, you're killing it.
@Loner-Wolf
@Loner-Wolf Жыл бұрын
Brother you live once and life is short. Make the most of it and remember better to be single and happy than be in a relationship with a partner who is going to make life miserable.😊
@hubertcumberdale2651
@hubertcumberdale2651 Жыл бұрын
@@Loner-Wolf I'm liking this attitude guys! Women lose most of their looks after 40-45 anyway and didn't even want to get married until 33 or whatever in the first place. Such a short window of that attractive feminine comfort, but a long time to enjoy your hobbies. Live ya life!
@kyhxx
@kyhxx Жыл бұрын
. based atleast^
@ShivaCVIII
@ShivaCVIII Жыл бұрын
I don't remove them from my life, I let them stay and wind them up 🤣
@fairpoet81
@fairpoet81 Жыл бұрын
💗Happy Valentine's Day, Aaron. Looks like your channel is going great! You're never completely alone, brother. Widow, 41 here, also a loner. I won't give up on love, it's pure energy 💟
@byteblock1667
@byteblock1667 Жыл бұрын
I'm not on the autism spectrum. I'm 47 and never had a girlfriend and it's not from lack of effort either.
@GhostintheBand
@GhostintheBand Жыл бұрын
Hell yeah, rock ‘n’ roll on that statement!❤
@bhaskarnathani9535
@bhaskarnathani9535 Жыл бұрын
Yo Aaron talk to her man she looks cute 🥰
@Ampraa
@Ampraa Жыл бұрын
Would be a beautiful blessing if the two of you gave each other a chance! Would be wonderfully happy for the both of you❤️
@abgmusic6797
@abgmusic6797 Жыл бұрын
Really? Happy valentines day?
@love3V07
@love3V07 Жыл бұрын
I am following your page. I pray and hope you find someone. You're still young and you can still have all of what you've said. This is a great start! Knowing what you want and need to do. Good luck! We all are thinking the same things as you. But we are too afraid to say.
@TheLordboki
@TheLordboki Жыл бұрын
Turning 30 very soon. I feel ya. As painful, as it is to hear you are not alone in this.
@abcwow2400
@abcwow2400 Жыл бұрын
it sucks tbh but it is what it is i guess
@Zeburaman2005
@Zeburaman2005 7 ай бұрын
I was in your shoes once, yet 30 is when I finally dared to turn things around and started living fully. Chances are you have already done the required introspection and identified your strengths and weaknesses, so just take some risks and start putting yourself out there. I am nothing special and had to contend with severe traumatic childhood experiences, so I do understand how daunting it feels to think you are different and worthless. It is not easy, you will get hurt more than you can imagine, but you have to heal and keep trying if you want things to change for the better. Force fate’s hand until you get lucky. I was 37 when luck came my way, and I wouldn’t have been able to act on it had I not suffered plenty of defeats beforehand. Start doing you and don’t listen to online dating advice, since that is all macho BS to sell you useless consumer goods. Find out what works for you and who you can attract. If something feels wrong, leave it be and keep searching. Wish you all the best on your journey, brother.
@backseateats9513
@backseateats9513 6 ай бұрын
I’m single because I have a small penis and I’m embarrassed of what a lady will think. I have offers but I turn them down 😢
@tripsbacks
@tripsbacks Жыл бұрын
I'm a 51 year old "normie" surrounded by "autistic" family. So, I suppose I can empathize to a small degree of what you go through only from what I can perceive from their experiences. I will say this though in complete confidence, we have all been lied to. This idea that there is something wrong with us if we never experience relationships, whether they be romantic or platonic. I have come to the realization that it is our trauma we suffer as children by the hands of those who raise us that fools us into thinking that we should be a particular way, and EVERYONE has been traumatized. I have my own challenges, that quite frankly are very demanding and sometimes downright difficult, but I have learned to let life happen and be present as much as a I can. Real happiness or peace if you will, comes in letting go of all opinions (including the ones in our own heads). When we stop trying to get an identity from every little thing that comes in contact with us is where real freedom exist. I don't have a life, I AM life and it was made to live. Just my two cents. I wish you and everyone else well.
@philproffitt8363
@philproffitt8363 Жыл бұрын
I would say everyone lives LIFE...characterizing it as 'trauma' just promotes a victim mentality. The Greek philosophers had it figured way back: By the time you reach late 20s, settled into adulthood, you should have let issues of childhood fall away. They likened it to peeling the layers of an onion...I guess discarding the outer nonsense to reveal the adult in control of your own destiny. Easier said than done for many...and decent therapy should be used perhaps for those who struggle. I say again...I can NOT agree with characterizing most people's childhood by saying "everyone has been traumatised" (if I understood you correctly) and I think it would be harmful if it were embraced by most as a general view. I agree what you say at the end...real happiness perhaps comes not just in truly being yourself, not what other expect, but I'll quote Jordan Peterson (seems like a genuine well-intentioned expert psychologist) when he says the general key to a happy life is engaging and being useful to others (be that family/community etc...) because I think he was eluding to the fact that excessive self-focus (worst case being narcissism) does not lead to happiness/contentment. My two cents in the pot...wish you well too.
@Pugetwitch
@Pugetwitch Жыл бұрын
@@philproffitt8363 Jordan Peterson has a right-wing, misogynistic agenda.
@joisspeaking
@joisspeaking Жыл бұрын
Societal norms and expectations are absolutely depressing for anyone who doesn't fulfil them. It's really sad. There's no right way to live your life. Everyone's life is lived the right way for them.
@SeaChellesShore
@SeaChellesShore Жыл бұрын
"I don't have a life, I AM life ..." Beautifully said
@brianmeen2158
@brianmeen2158 Жыл бұрын
There is definitely a strong societal pressure put on us to have partners from an early age.. family, friends and even tv and media all send strong messages that people should be partnered. I do think most of us strong instincts to be with someone. That said, I’ve honestly found serious relationships to be very overrated. I don’t know if it’s due to my introversion or other factors though
@brianwaller7383
@brianwaller7383 Жыл бұрын
The sad reality is it’s going to get worse for the vast majority of men. I very rarely get dates and even if I get one it’s almost always the same result, one date and ghost. I just gave up. Started focusing on hobbies and interests.
@rambojambo588
@rambojambo588 Жыл бұрын
My situation is exactly the same, very brave of you to put this out there, good luck
@montyturner6511
@montyturner6511 7 ай бұрын
Hopefully things get better for you man. I'm so sorry that it's been some rough years, but I hope that things change for the better for you man. God speed.
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