Fleet Weak feat. Alex Nichols | Chapo Trap House

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Episode 842 - Fleet Weak feat. Alex Nichols (6/17/24)
/ chapo-trap-house
Art/Animation by Emily Halaka @emilyhalaka
Featured player Alex Nichols returns to look at the creeping criminalization of the “edgar” haircut in Tekkkxas, the jomney sun-ization of the U.S. Navy, the state of the American “young” fascist movement, and Joe Biden’s floundering celebrity outreach program.
Keep an eye out on our Patreon for a new series of Vic Berger videos covering Trump’s time away from the White House in Mar-a-Lago, premiering exclusively at / chapotraphouse starting June 18.
#chapotraphouse #chapo

[@DropTheForkNow]

Can they just make Alex a permanent addition at this point

[@raforther]

Addition*

[@DropTheForkNow]

@@raforther Oof my bad

[@burieddagger8064]

I kinda like the rotation thing they've got going, especially with the tactical deployment of Hesse and the seeking derangements people for reporting on Gay City

[@wasd8837]

I miss matt :(

[@JoeSims1776]

The world will never be the same

[@WoahGeeWow]

Me too, brother. He would’ve loved the William Jennings Bryan riff. He’ll be back one day.

[@jm6406]

Yeah idk why they did that to him

[@bitteralmonds666]

The PENUMA did not take 🙈💦

[@510SPINESPLITTA]

I don’t care how long it takes. I want Matt to fully rest and recover until he feels like he is ready.

[@jj947]

Evo Morales’ haircut is the same as the LEGO Luke Skywalker hair piece from 1999

[@c.andrew3944]

I appreciate Felix's restraint in not data dumping when asked why the Navy wants hypersonic missiles but making sure to pronounce it seawiz

[@grimmportents8951]

This week on America is Broken... haircuts.

[@endoplasmicreticulum8777]

God, Felix is so funny.

[@SSgtJohnEP]

El Camino means the road. It came out a year after the similar Ford Ranchero, which was slang for a farm worker.

[@jvladcliff4083]

Anton Chigurh, total alpha hitman, bowl cut.

[@stefanoalves8862]

The Ted Lasso navy

[@slickstufneatstuf]

The Will Sasso army

[@FirstnameLastname-kn5sw]

Fred Armysen was right there... Anyway, Parks and Force Recon.

[@clamsauce2235]

Alex Nichols is my big tall dad. :) -sent from my ipad

[@post-centrist666]

Woke up at 4:30 AM. Feels like it’s lunchtime even though it’s only 8:40 AM.

[@Mannydamon]

Do you have an edgar?

[@post-centrist666]

@@Mannydamon Like the Latino High Fade Bowl Haircut?

[@czujnyhugo]

My Soulja Boy console just arrived! Thank you US Navy! Thamk you from Poland.

[@CzolgoszWorkinMan]

OH the vulcan/romulan haircut

[@Virjunior01]

Wake up, babes. Early drop

[@Joeljaboy]

thanks babe

[@brentoncarter4275]

Let the Andrenachrome flow

[@JoeSims1776]

It’s pretty late here on Epstein island

[@6idangle]

Chapo fans in the West Bank got the jump on us though, think about that.

[@lukeguilfoyle2425]

@@brentoncarter4275I’d just finished my third child sacrifice for this morning when I got the notification of new Chapo on my phone. Praise Satan!

[@thekidwhodraws]

The Edgar on a white guy aka the Dylan roof

[@cat_city2009]

Edgars with the hard R.

[@berdyderg900]

?

[@JonTeriini]

Refusing to eat Broccoli in solidarity with Edgars.

[@elijahplummer3655]

Good one!

[@avemazov]

PAVEMENT PLAYED ON TRANSITION ✨️

[@noahwoods9102]

Felix is wrong, under UCC Article 2 (which governs the sale of moveable goods) the perfect tender rule is still recognized - at least that is what the bar exam assumes I am gay

[@Badtown1988]

Once I hear something is “sparking outrage across Texas,” I’m immediately onboard, no context needed or wanted.

[@geodav5700]

Smaller meals???

[@fluffy9071]

we must get more feral hogs in the bible belt (sincerely)

[@rileystratton6772]

went to school with like 30 edgars, insane i am just now hearing about the edgar pandemic

[@FionaOfMountLawley]

The USS Dwight D. Eisenhower is a Nimitz class aircraft carrier. The crew complement is ~3,532 with an additional ~2,480 in the air-wing. That's a total of ~6,012. 15 to 18 crew members birthday will fall on any given day. Why one 19 year old rating gets publicised eludes me. Maybe he's a really neat E2 ?

[@jacobs2099]

Probably got the most boot sailor they could. Too boot to know better yet.

[@Luminousreign]

They make you pay to leave your car, but they will send your mom a social media post about you recieving a cookie... which has to be some kind of sick joke. Did you want the cookie? could everybody possibly hate you more lol

[@rileystratton6772]

first minute i KNEW it was the Edgar before they said and i cackled out loud

[@whothewu]

Weird that they keep using the phrase “happen to have” implying coincidence in defense of the ban

[@hansjuker8296]

Obviously businesses are losing money. So F the Edgar's and if they're all brown oh well.

[@lukewojdylo9241]

Everyone knows you give a sailor orange sliceys and a Hi-C juice box. #nomorescurvy

[@tjm881]

I have a suspicion that Texas restaurants allow The Edgar haircuts in, but never out of the kitchen..

[@bitteralmonds666]

There should be a Mexican restaurant called “El Wey.” 🧉🦄

[@RisqueBrusque]

El Güey

[@Airbag15]

U$A: Tries to pass half a trillion dollar military budget. Still can't take over the M1ddle 3ast and the Red Sea. Womp womp

[@butterfish-g9f]

There's a lot of short term money in disfunction and failure. Every aspect of the US functions like this now.

[@taxirob2248]

That's because they are averse to taking anything over (officially.) It's all about public-private partnerships, remember?

[@hansjuker8296]

And as everything becomes more "diverse" it turns to utter shit. Like the military for instance!

[@ChannelMath]

looking at google images "edgar haircut", it seems they are so varied as to be practically uncategorizable. The only thing (mostly) in common between them is flat straight bangs on the forehead, but even that is variable

[@garcalej]

Never knew any Edgars growing up. Knew a couple Pedros though. And one creepy kid we were all certain was a Chigurh.

[@akumakorgar]

I knew a guy wearing an Edgar suit

[@ArgDu]

@akumarkorgar Sugar. In water. MORE.

[@jasonmcarthur4764]

Lived in Yemen for a year in early 2000s. Khat was good times with my friends there.

[@murthunt1047]

Can we also ban the Alpaca look now popular among teenagers?

[@hemingshark327]

racist against white people are we now?

[@fkrkf]

What's the alpaca cut?

[@fredfuckstone914]

Keep your clippers away from The Tri-state Microphone

[@bitteralmonds666]

@@fkrkf It’s the broccoli hair🧉🦄

[@Luminousreign]

Ban All Hair.

[@AdrianMendoza23]

I'm more of a 'Fluffy Edgar' fan.

[@indyjoe6]

its just a french crop tho?

[@0The_Farlander0]

I never thought the navy would get gayer than when i was in but they somehow succeeded and made it even worse somehow

[@rb5519]

If the Edgar can be banned how did the mullet never get banned.😂

[@bitteralmonds666]

Sooo many hockey fights on that hair alone is enough to qualify it as a war crime. ☠️💦

[@mjarman93]

Id love to see Alex with an edgar

[@therealspiroagnew818]

Edgar Lowenaffchen

[@solas6342]

The University of Sexas at San Antonio

[@Luminousreign]

I think it is very funny that some poor boot is getting baited into asking the wrong guy for a cookie.

[@HesGotaGun505]

Ooooh a Joeys World Tour endorsement could put Biden over the top.

[@TheDrunkMunk]

I'm a relatively new fan but this is the funniest ep ive heard so far

[@mc5967]

Did you start listening after matt had to leave? If so thats so sad

[@Joeljaboy]

Wassup my Kokiris

[@ZenobiaofPalmyra]

MacArthur was army, Felix.

[@mrwobblyshark465]

The only time i've seen an "edgar" i like is Capitan's edgar mullet thing in Cyberpunk 2077 its odd but it works really well

[@chocolateleftisttanuki3690]

Where is my Joe Biden x One Piece collab

[@imeowmeowkat]

Did someone finally give felix coke? He's in top form today

[@xboxbreadbox8404]

omg they got pavement in this one

[@bitteralmonds666]

I would’ve also accepted Beck’s “Devil’s Haircut.” 🧉🦄👌🏽

[@davespergman1742]

Lmao pura pienche takuache cuh

[@cat_city2009]

23:40 Oh my God. This is how he became the bloodthirsty psycho who wanted to start a nuclear war in Korea.

[@therealspiroagnew818]

Lowenaffchen killed it on this one

[@user-mg6mw3gw6s]

Not them not knowing Harrison ford is dead

[@HeiressEllie]

we love lowenaffchen

[@FreeSamich]

Lol I'm really looking forward to reading the eventual Wikipedia article, "the global munitions shortage of 2024-26," that illustrates the relative peace and calm of the world at that time because the global powers sought diplomatic solutions rather than attack each other and their interests

[@mickeydoodle69]

Does Alex have a podcast or a channel or is he just the funniest person on earth without an actual job?

[@saintbeau2779]

Chapo FYM baby

[@FritzCinemaNow]

What happened to Matt

[@MapOfTheLost]

he had a stroke and is still recovering

[@elijahplummer3655]

Edgar cutz do attract a certain personality- can’t really blame em

[@hansjuker8296]

Yeah it's a flag they're flying.

[@davespergman1742]

Roman Optimus princeps Imperator Caesar Nerva Traianus Divi Nervae Filius Agustus had the Edgar haircut throughout his life and is immortalized in Roman sculpture with it. He was also born in Hispania which makes sense why it hit the Mexican American population so hard. It’s epigenetic memory passed from spainairds to the Mexican Indian.

[@hansjuker8296]

Yeah! That's it! 😂😂😂

[@sislater6334]

💪 Ansar Allah

[@bdinh3130]

"I'd trust you as far as I can throw your phone" I mean, I don't know what metric he would use for "far" but like the whole point of that fucking saying is that you would say that to like a fat guy or you would at least say something that was like, idk, fucking actually heavy? I don't want dementia president.

[@Some_Average_Joe]

I don't trust you as far as I could tiddilywink you

[@lamer6767]

hes threatening to throw the phone

[@ArgDu]

Phone vs. berder, which represents the graver threat to our institutions? We need 5 round table discussions on this, running non stop on cable news until further notice.

[@Agentsmiskatonic]

Felix has made that "This is why we don't have healthcare joke" in the last 4 episodes and those Star Wars jokes were rough. I miss Matt.

[@cat_city2009]

We all do. It looks like he's making a recovery and live out his life in comfort with his family, but I have a strong feeling that his podcasting days are over.

[@Agentsmiskatonic]

@cat_city2009 I'm glad he's getting better, and from the little bit I've seen, you're right about his podcasting career.

[@OGAshton]

What happened to him?

[@FionaOfMountLawley]

@@OGAshton Stroke.

[@deathmagneto-soy]

@@OGAshton - They hit him with the Havana raygun.

[@user-mg6mw3gw6s]

Harrison Ford isn’t dead?

[@jjb.6152]

Good morning

[@evenoddridge4829]

11:24

[@LocalFoe]

Vacant

[@russlcorey]

I like that the racist guy is now saying “you’re ignorant”

[@hansjuker8296]

Maybe they are...

[@hansjuker8296]

They have that haircut because they think it makes them Aztec warriors. I say they share their fate.

[@akumakorgar]

They get to join Huitzilopochtli in the afterlife and then reincarnate as monarch butterflies and hummingbirds?

[@theoldanarchist]

Alex is definitely not the future of Chapo.

[@fwowncwown]

I love this show. 🙌🏼🤍