FNAF: SB REWRITTEN - CH 9 (AO3 WRITTEN VERSION AVAILABLE!)

Link to written version: archiveofourow...

[@kiwiqueen138]

All right, here we go, this is the point where the rewrite gets crazy. Did I do well with Monty? :D Link to next episode: kzbin.info/www/bejne/moTMpaqdrLuFhck Link to previous episode: kzbin.info/www/bejne/hJO1mWmGYtR2iLs Link to full playlist: kzbin.info/aero/PLKMzqZUiHWUjzZj0jfJym1CTORp4rdEDD LINK TO WRITTEN VERSION: archiveofourown.org/works/45445291?view_full_work=true

[@Da1X_Builds]

You did amazing, this has been incredible so far!

[@Thebluemamott]

In a word, *WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*

[@Thebluemamott]

I'm not a big monty fan but holy crap, I may have a new favorite character

[@Da1X_Builds]

@@Thebluemamott my head cannon is now Monty talks like android 13 from the DBZ Abridged Movie.

[@icyferaligatr9908]

Oh boy this chapter was insane. I could practically feel Gregory's dread as Monty just hid in the pool until he finished the race. But Monty being a nice guy was super unexpected. But i'm glad his character is getting beefed up more. Finally, that ending with all three in a standoff against Monty and Gregory makes me super excited to see where this goes in the next part. And finally, Jeromy replacing his father and being overly cruel is a good setup to everything happening. God damn this part was amazing. -Icy

[@lumisherbert5682]

The thumbnail with Chica and Roxy missing their beak and eyes respectively jumpscared me. (Spoilers Below) Edit: splashing in a silent and completely still environment is probably one of the most terrifying sounds possible, especially if it's the kind of splash that implies that something big is actively moving closer. Edit 2: Having Thalassophobia makes this episode so much scarier Edit 3: Holy crap I love Monty so much. I wanna be his friend ^w^ EDIT 4: "this place for kids is not a safe place for kids"

[@Jadinite-2006]

I loved how Monty has a bit of a Redemption Arc going on.

[@movedtoanotherchannel]

"Monty's Raceway" hey wait a minute somethings not right here-

[@cyanide_crow7970]

Sometimes a family is two giant animatronic animals and their adopted gremlin son. What do you mean that didn't happen

[@Wee_Mewon]

It hasn’t happened... *yet*

[@freedomroses]

There is no way to describe how much I love this pair of comments

[@kratosdad1760]

Omg monty being a good guy? Thats sick

[@TVBug_]

Moon, please don't kill Gregory

[@piggymation4217]

I litterly binged the whole series in a day, im about to watch this and im super nervous-

[@Da1X_Builds]

Only a minute in and geebus does Chica look mortifying without her beak! Edit: Hell Yes! Southern Monty!

[@mythicaldrawer7072]

I never thought I needed a southern accent Monty till I heard it.

[@sensitivetomato2440]

I love the slight southern drawl that Monty has! Is there a reason why you gave Monty Roxy's attraction and her laser tag?

[@kiwiqueen138]

Roxy’s has a laser tag arena because 1: X-ray vision would actually help her be better during Laser tag matches by being able to track down people that are hiding behind the walls (I don’t know why the game thought that having x-ray vision would help her in a race track lol) 2: the association of her eyes being burned by the blaster Monty has the raceway because 1: there be an actual reason for him to have a water-based a job, by being an obstacle for the kids, kind of like one of those ‘Big black chompy monsters on chains’ in Mario kart lol 2: The golfing atmosphere had nothing going for it and it wasn’t very intimidating or complicated, I just prefer the idea of a race track more than golfing So basically, I switched around their games because it made the story a lot tidier :)

[@sensitivetomato2440]

@@kiwiqueen138 Thank you very much! That actually makes a lot of sense now that I think about it

[@awe_brey_n_hd1266]

How the heck did I not see that X-ray vision would be better for laser tag lol

[@mythicaldrawer7072]

I think I figured out why there are 44 chapters. It so they can get the others to unchip and team up against Vanessa, which I'm still questioning her motive! Is she doing this to get the remnant, but how would she know of it in the first place? If there is no Glitchtrap, that would me that William won't be coming back (right?)

[@TogenMerfagen]

I litteraly was guessing what monty was gonna do, and i just knew it was about the chip, i knew it

[@Dropsydrowsy]

Honestly I look forward to every Friday

[@icebirdj5935]

Welp it's official, I'm legally a Monty fan

[@JoshuaA1307]

I have always been a Monty simp…. If no one loves him at his worst then they don’t deserve him at his best 😅

[@malinok4889]

I would love to play through this as a game

[@PixelPower0615]

24:03 That freaking gave me a heart attack!!!

[@JoshuaA1307]

Truly shows how well the performance was 😊

[@TheJAJPG]

Oh my gosh, this whole episode was amazing and I can’t wait to see the next one!

[@squiddyflip3039]

24:04 Girl how did you make that sound effect that mwas CRAZY!

[@cookieandme23]

I love how the pitcher is edited with Roxie’s lost eyes and chickas meat up vibes lost beck

[@Alphetawoofious]

awe man, Victor M. gave em a good life down to his probable grave

[@BaneOfMyExistence1929]

My friend won’t talk to mEeEeEe so this is very great to see rn P.s. YIPPEE Edit: HOLY HELL 1 HOUR⁉️⁉️

[@Alice_The_Person3707]

How did Gregory not put 2 and 2 together from the splashes and the carts disappearing and realize that the splashes were the carts falling in the water?

[@wildwinter1971]

Did you drop something in the bathtub for the splash sound effects

[@kiwiqueen138]

Yep pretty much lol

[@wildwinter1971]

@@kiwiqueen138 cool really good episode I’m excited for the next one:D

[@catalinadima7630]

hi :)

[@koopajuniorsavannah5170]

Did like it much

[@Lizzy_Stories09]

Me wondering what happened to Freddy 😰😧

[@lavendertoastmoth]

“This place for kids is not safe for kids!” Best line in the whole series so far

[@enderniffler628]

EVERYONE GET YOUR POPCORN AND EARLY TICKETS HERE! ITS MONTY TIME 🍿✨ Edit 1: ACK THESE CLIFFHANGERS! Absolutely amazing work Kiwi! Can’t wait for the next chapter Edit 2: as a southern person that accent was pretty good 👌

[@LocalADHDGal2412]

Can we just take a minute to appreciate how much time and effort went into this series it’s amazing!💜

[@GallexyCat]

Ahh, this was awesome!! I never thought I'd love Monty so much, but here we are. You wrote him to be so likeable, in a stubborn kind of way, plus the southern accent is adorable and weirdly perfect for him. I'm so glad Gregory has someone else on his side, and I can't wait to listen to more! This episode was phenomenal, Freddy being a dad was adorable, and the splashes in the otherwise dead quiet was awesome and terrifying. Love the series!

[@Sageknot]

YEEEEAAAAH Oml I love Monty so much, I wonder how he's gonna react to seeing Chica and Roxy obliterated (though he probably didn't like them that much in the first place so he'd likely side with Gregory i feel)

[@TheBananaMan971]

As the (self-proclaimed) Number 1 Montgomery Gator fan, yes. you did well with My boy Monty.

[@spiritofchaos58]

Oh wow. wow wow WOW. What a chapter, where to start? I LOVE how you did the raceway! We really played with our expectations. with how Moon, Chica, and Roxy went, alongside Freddy's warning, everyone, Gregory included, was ready for Monty to be just as aggressive. The dread of waiting for him to attack was absolutely terrifying, and it just made him dragging Gregory into the water scarier. I adore the idea of Gregory having to pull the chip out of Monty. I'm just thinking of that being an actual minigame in the game, and it'd be sooo cool. I love how the takedown (or a non takedown here) of each animatronic feels so unique. And MONTY!!!! I LOVE HIM??? It's amazing how lovable he is. The accent, how childishly defensive he got about having disobeyed Venessia, and then how childishly smug he'd been about having been proved right. He's so funny, I love him. We got very little of an actual personality for him in-game, and yet this fits him perfectly. This is definitely a guy who'd say "You can hide, but you can't hide!" I'm gushing, he's just such a fun change of pace from all the attempted murder. I was smiling the whole time he was talking. His accent is so cute! He's a little cowboy!!! And GREGORY! We finally figured out why he's there, and we finally got a bit of backstory for him! I really enjoy how you're writing him; he really feels like a very smart, very terrified child in a way I don't think the game quite captured. I love how he's becoming braver as things go on; not only being more willing to fight back against his attackers, but also realizing that he has to save his brother. Gregory and Monty’s interactions are killing me in the best way possible. Gregory TEASING Monty over being afraid of Freddy is so funny, and only funnier given how afraid Gregory was of Freddy a few chapters ago. They’re so funny. I am SO excited to see Monty’s interactions with the others at play. ESPECIALLY Freddy and Chica, who seem like the nicest. It’ll be interesting to see how they justifying disliking him, when as far as we can tell, his only crime is having been Bonnie’s replacement. And the notes at the end!! Gosh, Music Man! That is HORRIFYING, absolutely nightmarish what they did to him. Wow. It makes sense how it happened under new management; I know there's no way Vic would've done that. Jeremy must've taken control soon after Bonnie's botched repair and later breakdown; there's NO WAY Vic would've had Bonnie decommissioned like that. Just…SUCH a good chapter. I love this so much. Golly. I want to kiss Monty on the forehead. I want someone to beat Jeremy Miller, cause he deserves it. Gosh.

[@oliverroystone2253]

I ain’t reading all that

[@greendevil8017]

**Me getting on KZbin** KZbin: Hey did you know that KiwiQueen posted Me: ART WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME

[@cycloneabsol9405]

Holy shit I'm 30 seconds in and already terrified just by the art hot DAMN kiwi!!

[@cookieandme23]

Monty isn’t chipped?? He’s just extra I think there is to much time left 😬 Edit: Owo that’s even cooler!!!

[@cycloneabsol9405]

I love that you made Monty southern.

[@awe_brey_n_hd1266]

James? Okay where’s jessie

[@cycloneabsol9405]

I can't listen to this yet, it's just too dam long, but holy crap am I hyped!

[@kratosdad1760]

Oh yeah im so ready for this

[@lexxblep-groundzero1369]

several hundred pounts of mechanical gator sounds like a goor time to me 7w7 45:01

[@lexxblep-groundzero1369]

OMG THIS IS SO COOL THE IDEA THAT GREGORY IS A RUN AWAY!!1 YOU ARE A GENIOUS!!! THIS IS SO COOL!!

[@lexxblep-groundzero1369]

I love the choice to make Monty's intentions really mysterious at first. Is he going to hurt or kill Gregory or is he trying to help him it's really really weird at first and then whenever you find out what he's truly doing is interesting. The choice to make Monty even more of an outlier than the others is amazing Go guys!!

[@cookieandme23]

I loves Monty’s voice

[@astrumcat64.mp4]

Hole shit. Holy shit AAAAA

[@Wee_Mewon]

Monty is fren 😃