Following the Blueprint: A Wife’s Submission - Ephesians

When it comes to a family’s roles within the home, the “S” word (submission) can generate controversy. To modern ears, God’s standards can seem out-of-date and even distasteful to some. But I am suggesting that the quickest way to fulfillment for a married woman is to discover the freedom of her role as properly understood in Scripture. So let’s jump in and unpack this role and see how it is meant to correspond to a husband’s loving leadership.
This teaching is from our series Smart Home with Skip Heitzig from Calvary Church.

[@karlak2977]

Not all husband s are Christlike some are abusers!

[@j.p.5716]

The same could be said of women. What is your point?

[@j.p.5716]

@@marcvatsend3573 - Marc, then what do you do with 1 Peter 3:1-2 that tells wives they are to submit to their husbands even if they are being disobedient to the word? How about the way it refers back to 1 Peter 2:18-25 that tells wives they are to submit to their bad husbands even if it causes them to suffer? What kind of abuse are we talking about here anyway? These days, women cry abuse if their husbands don't take them out to eat 3 times a week. Marc, please learn God's word better before you start giving biblical advice. Today's women are deceived enough already.

[@andrewthomson3139]

I am so blessed that God is building me into His kind of Man, the one that my lovely lady can secure herself around and submit to❤ I want to be the kind of leader she can follow and God is building it in me

[@heathersnyder8789]

Sounds beautiful

[@yvonnezackery4080]

🙏🏽 Amen. Very nice 👌🏽

[@rajeshpalamattam4879]

☀️ 🙏🏾 Rajesh Palamattam Deputy Commissioner - Law

[@j.p.5716]

Not terrible but still a pretty weak exposition in some areas. Your softening of the meaning of hupotasso is unfortunate. Saying hupotasso does not mean "obey" is an outright untruth. You mentioned the middle voice in Greek. If you look at the actual definition of hupotaso (see below), in the middle voice it exactly means obey. Strong's Concordance hupotassó: to place or rank under, to subject, mid. to obey Original Word: ὑποτάσσω Part of Speech: Verb Transliteration: hupotassó Phonetic Spelling: (hoop-ot-as'-so) Definition: to place or rank under, to subject, mid. to obey Usage: I place under, subject to; mid, pass: I submit, put myself into subjection. The whole idea of it being a military term is the fact that the proper response to authority of a higher rank is to obey them.

[@mbb1742]

Pastor Skip Heitzig, I love listening to your sermons. Listening has really helped grow me in the word. This is the 1st sermon of yours that I listened to, that left me with a question... not a complaint, but a questtion... God revealed to me about a year ago (16 years into our marriage), that we were far from a good example of marriage. Not that we fought. No drinking or drugs or abuse. But our marriage lacked real, true, love. When I became aware of this, I realized that we lack God within our marriage. We both attend church. We both believe and study. We both pray. But all that we were doing, we did separate. So, God put in my heart that I was not a submissive wife. That I did not love my husband as I love Jesus. This is where I struggle and where my question comes from. At that time, I lowered my expectations of my husband and began to see him a a man who will never be exactly like Christ. I accepted him as a fallible human, as am I. My love for him exploded once I made this (not so simple) mental shift. But how am I to love anyone, as I love Jesus? My love for Him is all consuming, head to toe, heart bursting, kind of love! The creator of the heavens and earth! The being who made oceans and waves, and told the water to stop at the shore! The One who pursued me in the grossest darkness and became my light! This is the all mighty God here... how could I EVER love a human as I love Him? It's not even a close 2nd. My husband is 2nd to God, but it's not close. My daughter is 3rd and she's not close. Now, I love them... I see them as very precious gifts God has temporarily blessed me with here on earth. Is there a way to love my husband as I do Christ? I've come to understand that I'm able to love my husband because I do love God, but it's nothing like my love for the Father. Nor do I want it to be, if I'm to be honest.

[@CalvaryABQ]

Hi MB, I am Pastor Eric and your questions were forwarded to me to answer on behalf of Calvary Church. First, I must say that it is a blessing to hear a wife striving so earnestly to be obedient to the word of God concerning her husband. I appreciate your strong effort to please and honor Christ in your relationship. MB, you ask some very good questions and ones that disserves more clarity, let me see if I can give you some more understanding of the scripture teaches in this matter. I also want to say thank you for being a faithful listener to Pastor Skip’s sermons I am overjoyed to heat that they are helping you grow and that they encourage you to walk faithfully before God. MB, you make some very honest admissions in your email, “I was not a submissive wife...,” “I did not love my husband as I love Jesus.” And you honestly admit, “At that time, I lowered my expectations of my husband and began to see him as a man who will never be exactly like Christ. I accepted him as a fallible human, as am I. My love for him exploded once I made this (not so simple) mental shift. But how am I to love anyone, as I love Jesus?” love that, and great question! Let me answer this more from a biblical perspective. The command to love, we read in Matthew 22:37-40 (NKJV) 37 Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and great commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 25:40-45 (KJV) 40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as you have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, you have done it unto me. Luke 6:27-30 New International Version (NIV) 27 “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Galatians 6:10 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Luke 6:33 “And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.” Matthew 5:11 “Blessed are you, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. ... "Blessed are you when people reproach. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets before you.…” Romans 15:2-4 New King James Version (NKJV) 2 Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification. 3 For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached you fell (have fallen on Me.” 4 For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope. Here is thought to draw from this, a principle to ponder, think about it this way, (In how you are to love your husband in this tough way.) you have to love on Jesus Christ through him, through your husband. He is the recipient of that love (yes your husband is, he’s like the middle guy); yet you are loving Jesus and seeing Jesus through him. I pray that makes sense. The question you have to ask is, is He “Jesus” worthy of that affection and love, even if it has to go to him, through your husband. Husband may not be worthy from time to time, but Jesus always is, yes, yes? “Inasmuch as you have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, you have done it unto me.” Here is another thought to ponder and this is the point, “Love as Jesus loves.” John 13:34, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.” You see Jesus’ model and example becomes our model to follow. Question how has He loved us? 1 Corinthians 13 shows us how, not only how we are to love one another but also how we are loved by Him, Jesus Christ our Lord. We are to love as Jesus loves. Matthew 22, Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. How has Jesus Loved us? Jeremiah 31:3 The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. This kind of love says there is nothing you can do to make me [Him] love you any more; furthermore, there is nothing you can do to make me [Him] love you any less. I have already made up my mind. See also John 3:16 and 1 John 4:19, “We love Him because He first loved us.” We love because He loves us. Ephesians 4:32, 31Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, outcry and slander, along with every form of malice. 32Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. So MB, it’s not that you have to love husband just as you love Jesus, but rather, love others as you love yourself, love others because you love Jesus, love them as you are loving Jesus through them, love because it is who you are in Christ Jesus. Love them because Jesus loves them (John 3:16) and maintain that thought that they are also precious gifts from the Lord. “I love them... I see them as very precious gifts God has temporarily blessed me with here on earth.” “...I've come to understand that I'm able to love my husband because I do love God, but it's nothing like my love for the Father. Nor do I want it to be, if I'm to be honest.” YES! That’s it, it is God (in Christ) first, and then husband, then children, then others... Here is a hard text that emphasizes the love we are to have for God above all others. That compared to the love we have for God all other loves we hold, in comparison, is as hate. Remember Abraham sacrificing his son Isaac not that he hated his son but obedience to God out weighted his love for his son. Luke 14:26 "Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.” Great question and great thoughts, stay strong in the Lord. In His great love and service, Eric P. Lamb

[@melindabanksisom8781]

@@CalvaryABQ Great Explanation!🌹

[@j.p.5716]

I will give you a simpler answer. Wives are not instructed to love their husbands. In Titus 2, the older women are instructed to teach the younger wives how to love their husbands but the bible specifically teaches wives to submit to their husbands (Colossians 3:18, Ephesians 5:22-24, 1 Peter 3:1-2) and to reverence them (Ephesians 5:33b). Focus on those things and pray for your husband and leave him to Christ.

[@ikefrancisvocales903]

Correct everything. Thanks 🙏👍

[@j.p.5716]

Also your quoting and exposition of 1 Peter is unfaithful. 1 Peter 3:1-2 does not speak of husbands who "do not believe the word". That is what the NIV and a few other (loose) translations might say but that is not an accurate translation of the original text. In fact, the vast majority of the translations say "disobedient" or some form of the phrase "does not obey." Disobedient or "does not obey" is proper because the original word in the Greek is apeitheó: to disobey. A husband who is not being "obedient to the word" can be a saved man or a lost man. You mentioned "obedient" toward the end of the sermon but then you backtracked to "believe" again. I would suggest using a more literal translation to teach from.

[@AndreRosario-zm8pf]

🙏🙏🙏🌎 Amen. Thank you family

[@duniamaisha7695]

Halleluyiah We must obey God rather than men-holy spirit lead me to my own..