For Twenty Year Olds Who Have Never Been Loved

This is a poem by one of my favorite writers Meggie Royer, everyone should check her blog.
🔗 / meggieroyerpoetry
🔗writingsforwinter.tumblr.com/...
I hope this video helps people feel a little less alone and a little more hopeful about the future. I want to add that it's truly a privilege to combine Meggie Royer's poems with my passion of capturing the things around me, I urge you to check more of her work because it's truly amazing. Lastly, the people on the video are my friends and I thank them for allowing me to film them.
Forever Humbled,
a kid with a camera
🔰Support me on Patreon: / illneas
🔰Find me here 🔗 / _illneas
🔗 / illneas
🔗 / illneas
Second channel
🔗 / @akidwithacameraorjust...
🔰References
-The narrator is Iness J.
Her email.
🔗[e-mail]
-The music is this:
Declaration - Johannes Bornlof
🔰Communities
- / discord
- / 2314655172176122
- / searchingformeaning
Thanks to Chubbz for helping me with the audio
🔰My equipment:
I film handheld with a Panasonic Lumix
G80
amzn.to/2uGqmQZ
GX80
amzn.to/33e5Tye
📷Olympus M.Zuiko Digital 45mm F1.8 Lens
amzn.to/2vr9P3N
🔰for twenty-year-olds who have never been loved by Meggie Royer
All of a sudden two decades have passed and you still have not kissed anyone with tongue, or kissed anyone at all for that matter, or had a 3 AM conversation with someone who would rather look into your eyes for ten minutes straight than talk. You have never worn a lover’s sweater or “forgotten” it at home in your bedroom just so you would have an excuse to see them again. You have never even stood face-to-face with someone who makes your hands shake so hard it feels like they’re both having a separate anxiety attack.
This causes you much guilt and self-blame and sadness but above all, an overwhelming curiosity. Are you really that ugly, that unwanted, that uninteresting, that boring, that no one, absolutely no one, has ever looked at you like the only thing on earth?
The answer is no. The better answer is that someone out there, somewhere in the world, is “wondering what it’s like to meet someone like you,” and they have two decades worth of love stored in their veins like a shoot-‘em-up drug, and they’re just about ready to inject it into someone else’s bloodstream. All you have to do is roll up your sleeves and wait for it to happen.
At times you felt so lonely you could stand at the edge of a cliff with nothing beneath you but air and grass and a long, long way down, and you’d still feel emptier than that canyon itself. Maybe you even danced with yourself alone in your room a few times, arms outstretched around a ghost, pretending someone else’s hands were on your waist, someone else’s eyes boring into yours.
Or maybe you fell temporarily in love with strangers on public transportation, fell in love with anybody who so much as accidentally brushed your hand on the way past. For you, falling in love with dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism for not having anyone to love you in return. But people are not eggs and falling in love with a dozen of them does not mean your shell will remain uncracked. One day you’re going to hit the point where you’re so desperate for human contact that you’re going to snap in half and all your love will bleed out like egg yolk.
But someone out there is eating a bowl of Ramen noodles right now, or putting on slippers, or settling into bed. They are doing all the normal things that you’ve done in your own life. They are just like you. They have cellulite and extra fat in all the wrong places and goals and fears and doubts and bad handwriting.
The truth is that they are just like you, and being just like you, they’re looking for a lover too. They’re what you might call a soulmate.
They think they’re all alone in feeling the way they do, but you’re really both two halves of a whole.
And one day you’ll meet them, bump into them on the street, and your two halves will be put together, and you’ll make one.

[@meggieroyer5724]

Thank you so much again illneas for creating such a beautiful and moving video of one of my poems! Such a beautiful color scheme and stunning music. It is such an interesting experience watching this video now as a 26-year-old after writing the poem when I was 19 and lonely and afraid. Looking back at the date I wrote this, it was only 2 months before I entered my very first relationship! What timing. I am hopeful that it provides comfort to others, no matter what age you are. Love will come when you least expect it, and it will be beautiful.

[@illneas]

Thank you for sharing a personal moment to accompany the poem. Once again I really enjoyed working on this video and thank you so much for the opportunity to create this.

[@shamikmazumder2835]

You're a sweetheart🥺🥺 i totally fell in love with this

[@ochadeudome1563]

I am a 19 year old watching this, it's very relatable. Thank you so much

[@jannatuladnin6241]

@Meggie Royer Thanks for making us feel that we aren't alone From a twenty-years-old.

[@nehasaini5827]

Meggie Royer beautiful poem❤️ I feel so connected❤️

[@justmahmud20]

Sometimes I wonder how is it feel like to listen a love song when you're in relationship with someone

[@gresiim8104]

same

[@sinchanadevanand2762]

Do you have Instagram page? I would love to follow you.

[@idk-if9zo]

Same dude same

[@nehamallela969]

OMG yesss

[@noobboi8199]

same man

[@kaeyana8541]

It hits even more differently when you're older than 20

[@kyupified2440]

23 and still single..

[@anigbochinaza7744]

21 and still single

[@jolomrtnz_6408]

21 and still single huhu

[@rayaris5173]

22 🙃

[@Ab-ub2ii]

21 :)

[@simantakalita9061]

"Maybe you even danced with yourself alone in your room" is the ordinary sentence that made the poem extraordinary ❤️

[@aliimjrk7863]

yes

[@binaypradhan2755]

The fact that this comment had only on reply is astonishing

[@monsumhatikakoty7533]

🌚🌚🌚🏳️🏳️🏳️

[@SamiKhan-sb4qm]

This sentence is so relatable as I use to dance quite often alone in my room. And that dance feels so ethereal as if your body is embodying the lonely feelings that you have...

[@ryyych7737]

Yea i always do

[@rohitagrawal6787]

This feels like it was specially written for me. - a 20 year old

[@chitvanrathour172]

Same

[@daniel_k_music]

Same

[@vivekrahul7538]

Same

[@mypandawilleatyou38]

I turned 20 last month, they’re watching

[@rohitagrawal6787]

@@mypandawilleatyou38 same with me too😄

[@Gabi____]

I saw the title, and it made me cry. To be honest, it hurts even more when someone had given you hope and then took it away from you.

[@ThePurpleCosmos]

damn right

[@darknight3613]

Dude you just perfectly described the reason i clicked on this video

[@Gabi____]

The reason for this is that if you've never experienced romantic love, you're driven more by curiosity. You don't feel like someone took something away from you because you've never had it. Once you meet that one special person, they make you feel like on drugs. But, one day, they decide they don't feel the same way. Everything they've given you- they take it away. in a second. Because they let you taste love and affection, now you know how it feels. Now it's hard to live without them and this feeling. You're left in agony and have to go through withdrawal.

[@liclaclac6032]

I feeell youu deeply, just experienced it :"(

[@Andrea_ft.V]

I don't know how to describe it, cuz u can't except by tears...keeping asking why to you, why they did it and so on...

[@scottmacquarrie5809]

I remember being exactly like this at 20 , now 32 years later I’m in love , married , kids , I’m loved , but still remember how it felt , ❤️to all who struggle

[@dianasa4086]

Thank you!🤍

[@AnilKumar-gi2dx]

I'm 23 , these lines hit harder than it supposed to.

[@death.noneexistentchannel5797]

Enjoy a lie

[@anshanshtiwari8898]

Thanks

[@user-hi1fx8bj9w]

I wish you’d experience joy in life everyday🤜🏻🤛🏻

[@fireflythinking1290]

Pleeeease, don't feel guilty for not being in a relationship, and don't rush yourself into one with anyone that will accept you. Wait and see, you'll know it when it feels right

[@diederickkruse3821]

Yet it is a default setting to want to blame. And if there is no one to blame, except the universe to whom we can do absolutely nothing, we at least have some place to put the pain, instead of always just sitting with it. Though, I do agree with you. It is what it is...

[@death.noneexistentchannel5797]

Su

[@lotuswolf1518]

I was single shamed got into a toxic relations with a cheater he molested me through manipulation ,I never told the police out of feat of being judged

[@siem9329]

@@lotuswolf1518 I am hoping you recover from that and find someone who'll treasure you instead, and in case you don't find one, be that person who'll love yourself. ♥️

[@lotuswolf1518]

@@siem9329 aww thank you so much

[@anonymousmanifestor5237]

This made me cry. I finally feel less alone knowing that I was never the only one feeling this way.

[@Necron990]

❤️

[@anonymousmanifestor5237]

@@Necron990 ❤️ :)

[@Necron990]

@@anonymousmanifestor5237 hang in there! 🌹

[@anonymousmanifestor5237]

​@@Necron990 Thank you for the encouragement❤️ It's been tough-this poem brought out feelings that I had forced myself to bury away for years. The healing can finally start now :) Sending you love and light x

[@Necron990]

@@anonymousmanifestor5237 *heartfelt hug*

[@elaiza8425]

Holy shit. It felt like it’s talking to me directly.

[@death.noneexistentchannel5797]

This fucked up mirror will do that to you

[@killerdamu1882]

I am 30 now but no one ever loved me, I don't even know how it feels to be loved, never kissed never hugged, still hoping someone somewhere is waiting for me as I am waiting for him, I hope we will meet soon.

[@jorgedominguez2256]

Where you from

[@indranilbanik3424]

I'm 29, and in much the same situation. However, I don't think it is actually bad. Relationships are a lot of trouble, and don't necessarily bring happiness. I've also been taught by my parents to be happy with what I have rather than unhappy with what I don't, so tend not to notice the lack of a girlfriend so much as the stuff I have actually accomplished. The astrophysics research I do is more useful to many more people than a hug or a kiss. Realistically, it is a romantic ideal to suppose meeting the 'right girl' will solve all my problems, when the more likely scenario is that it will just pile on several more.

[@osenazl]

@@indranilbanik3424 ‎

[@matsy1999]

💕💕

[@skierra]

amen. ^^

[@sangeetaboruah7420]

To be alone and to feel alone - two different things . The former gives you clarity and the latter gives you sorrow.

[@ioannisaliazis]

Well, this stereotype is a good one so I’ll use it, the wisdom coming from an Indian person, or maybe I’ve been listening to too many Jiddu Krishnamurti talks lately 😅 Very true either way, thank you!

[@ozmenelkhatib4642]

Lonely but not alone "Loneliness is a gift, all the others are a test of your endurance" Go all the way, -Bukowski

[@arunakarantarun9777]

So...true! feeling lonely is a devil's pit. I'm struggling to get out of it.

[@khushipatel0507]

@@arunakarantarun9777 the Abyss seems endless and you feel like the suffering will never end, until you stop drowning into it. Until you feel secure and brave enough to take just one step out of that sorrowful pit and let yourself smell the fresh scent of a new start. It might seem like it's going to destroy you and break you apart, but time has a way of joining us together and bonding our strands stronger. Trust me, you will find a way and come back stronger, wiser and healthier. Just give yourself time and keep trying every day to make yourself happier, you'll love yourself in the end and no one would take that away from you. Sending loads of virtual hugs for healing 💖🤗

[@arunakarantarun9777]

@@khushipatel0507 oh! that's so sweet of you. Thanks, I'm trying every single day

[@ayame585]

22 year old university student who has never been in a relationship, never had her first kiss, never had her first hug, never even held hands with anyone, never had a guy looked at her like she's the only most beautiful thing in the whole damn world and never been loved romantically by anyone. It gets lonely tbh

[@Forit26]

You’re just 22❤️ You’re still young, i’m sure you’ll find a nice guy👑

[@_crimson_18]

The worst part is when you start questioning if there's something wrong with you, there's no going back then, it's all just self-doubt and lonliness

[@mr.beancouldbreakmyspleen643]

I’m also 22 and in the exact position. Some days it’s fine but other days, it hurts.

[@vinzzr9907]

Same here

[@anjalikispotta914]

"All of a sudden two decades have passed n" I'm fine

[@machilla00]

RIGHT?!?

[@homunculi0408]

"falling in love with dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism for not having anyone to love you in return" I feel attacked. D':

[@clab5407]

I turn 20 in just over 3 months, and I relate to every. single. line. It hurts unbelievably bad. I’ve never been held, I’ve never held hands, I’ve never been kissed, I’ve never been looked at like nothing else around me mattered. as I get older it gets harder and harder to believe it’ll ever happen.

[@gresiim8104]

me too. I swear you're not alone. It's so hard, but we'll get through this.

[@basenetwork9446]

@@gresiim8104 even if we do get through this by the time we do we will already be so broken from the loneliness truly unfair ...

[@tsvh383]

It is so hard to keep believing in it. As youre getting older you suddenly run out of excuses you tell yourself as to why you shouldnt worry about not having a relationship yet as youre probably not ready for it or something like that. You see all the people around you all getting into relationships while youre still left alone wondering what it all is like. Eventually, atleast for me, you start to even struggle to imagine yourself in a relationship. Somehow it just feels unrealistic. Like its just not meant to be for you. You start feeling like youre further and further away from even getting a relationship. It just all feels so incredibly empty.

[@julietmjk]

@@tsvh383 I feel exactly the same. I don’t even know how to cope with it at this point in my life. I’m so tired of looking for reasons, in fact, I guees, I’m tired because I’m out of excuses.

[@annikaParnda]

Besides not being loved and not loving anyone, which is already hard enough on it's own, I sometimes cannot stand being around all my friends who are in relationships talking about their boy/girlfriends, of intimacy etc... Because in those moments not only do I not have a boyfriend but also nothing to add to the conversation. It's double the loneliness :(

[@daisybrain117]

Im 29 and I have danced with myself in the room . I still do .

[@Banoffeenyx]

I'm 17 and yesterday I waltzed around my room with myself, because I felt lonely after no one asked me to be their date to the ball which was the day before. Even if it was only with myself at least I didn't let those ballroom dancing lessons go to waste

[@Sandra-qb2vi]

@@Banoffeenyx 💕

[@eadamic17]

My dancing involves raving to high-quality techno, but yes I also do this with myself

[@jilliandawnmanalastas2892]

This poetry really describes me, a 20 years old nbsb and a hopeless romantic, falling in love with strangers everyday.

[@essentialsleeping6521]

Hi. you're really pretty. Do you wanna be friends? I know its weird, Please don't think I'm creepy I swear I'm not.

[@jilliandawnmanalastas2892]

@@essentialsleeping6521 thank you, sure 😊

[@essentialsleeping6521]

@@jilliandawnmanalastas2892 Yay. Hiii. How do we talk? Snap? Instagram?

[@Nanami_X_Higurama]

What does nbsb mean ??

[@jilliandawnmanalastas2892]

@@essentialsleeping6521 ig: missjilldawn

[@seemranhoro1572]

The heart knows when the search is over.

[@angelinaklein6930]

My heart doesnt know that yet

[@eyyywazzup3681]

Why is that?

[@angelinaklein6930]

@@eyyywazzup3681 I thought I loved someone once but they always rejected me and I haven't found anyone after but the person I did love wasnt meant to be so I dont know who my heart will settle with or if it ever will

[@eyyywazzup3681]

@@angelinaklein6930 don't search for love and Love will search you my dear

[@angelinaklein6930]

@@eyyywazzup3681 I'll keep that in mind ♡

[@hankaviolet6689]

”and when nobody wakes you up in the morning and when nobody waits for you at night and when you can do whatever you want - what do you call it, freedom or loneliness?” - charles bukowski

[@Defirence]

this is hitting way too hard... thank you, such beautiful words. Be well and at peace internet friend. :)

[@hankaviolet6689]

@@Defirence I'm glad these words spoke to you. Thank you for the kind words, it brought me joy. Take care 🩷

[@abyssalboy8811]

Bukowski wrote that????

[@poem]

“Sometimes you climb out of bed in the morning and you think I'm not going to make it but you laugh inside remembering all the times you've felt that way” ~ Charles Bukowski

[@samikshadhote99]

It's not because you're ugly or boring or unwanted! It's because you were busy in creating your better self not giving a damn about anyone. Be proud of yourself. Great things take time.

[@tanishatanvi4343]

Absolutely right. Building yourself takes time before loving someone else. we should find the reason to love ourselves first.

[@amayaaheer7651]

Agree.

[@blackbeardbeat2453]

But at the end of the day its hurts that's the reason for your presence in this poem 🙂

[@bro918]

In my case, I am ugly and unwanted, but unfortunately I wasnt building a better self or being proud 😂😂

[@TheSmellyHorse]

But I wasn’t tho

[@johngreen8344]

At 22, I'm really conflicted about the whole thing. Part of me wants to find someone to share stories with. Part of me wants to have someone I can hug in the middle of the night, when I feel like everything is crumpling apart. But another part of me can't see this happening. I'm not a perfect person and I have so much negativity weighing me down, that there is no way I could unload that onto someone else, just to ease the burden on my shoulders. I'm still picking up the pieces of myself and I can't expect someone else to cut their fingers on my shards. I was blown away by the section about falling for strangers on the street, as a self preservation method, but it's a bit different for me. I find solace in characters. I relate myself to them, imagining potential conversations as we each open up to each other about our problems, before looking for some way to resolve them together. I'm not so much interested in a relationship as I am in starting a companionship, where anything can be discussed, for it to be a safe space to open up and heal.

[@yellowsim3095]

I truly understand you... Thats how i feel too.. i turned 18 last month..and i am truly looking for someone to express all those feelings i have inside of me this whole time...i never had a guy to like me.. or maybe i did.. but never found out, so whats the point in being loved when you never get to share that emotion... Is someone really freaking wondering what is like to meet someone like me? I am such a hopeless romantic soul.. and i got so much to give... I guess some people were born to stay alone..

[@sfk661]

I'm the same as you.

[@noonehimself6922]

You just described me

[@nobodycansaveme733]

I relate so much

[@IMakeDumbStuff]

And here I thought I was the only fucked up person for having imaginary conversations with fictional characters.. I wish I could meet more fucked up people, you all sound amazing. ❤️

[@toomuch5484]

"for not having anyone to love you in return" that line breaks my heart

[@conflictpersona8]

Unrequited love hits differently

[@pandarosie422]

I remember hearing this poem just around when I turned 20, sad, unloved, a child, a nobody. I felt the words like a mirror, revealing the gloomy truth of my own life. Unexperienced and naive. I truly believed I would never fall in love, that not a single human being would love a creature like me. Someone who never speaks her mind, someone who doesn't enjoy living. Someone who often thinks about death. I was told I'm too young to understand love, or life in general. But, I wanted to feel the feeling, even just for a bit. Just messing around with love, experiencing it as a young girl. But I was too closed minded, and still am. But then, one day, I met a guy at work. Who constantly tried to talk to the silent me. And it just happened. The year 2020, may not be the best year in history, but it certainly was a big year for me. I felt so many new emotions, that were hiding inside me. Anger, pain, sadness. Love and warm. Now I, a 22 soon to be 23, am a year into a relationship I never thought I'd be in. Sometimes sad, sometimes happy. Didn't really know what to expect, or how to behave. Still scared of contacting. But a bit more open about life. Loneliness is a terrifying friend. It never shows you life as it is. I was alone and lonely. Lacking love that now fills my small heart. I truly feel in love, and loved, and the sparks never fade. Every once in a while, I tell myself how lucky I am. My partner and I fight more lately, but it doesn't make it less. Now I can proudly say, that I love loving love. I love you Leon. Forgive me for being blunt and not being able to convey my mind properly, but I truly, fully love you with all of my heart. Thank you.

[@savannahgraver7513]

Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful story-a forlorn 20 year old

[@dreamingaboutpinkskies5384]

this is so beautiful😭💕 so happy for you- another forlorn 20 year old

[@eurusjr5480]

21 yr old now , never dated,never kissed never been in a relationship and this hits me like a storm Update- Y'all I'm still 21 😂 but I just had my first kiss , still not in a relationship lmao ,but I'm much at peace now Update - 22 now, things have changed dramatically for good ,never dated , never been in a relationship still and I'm still at peace ,not insecure or anxious. I've learnt to be confident a lot more , be comfortable under my skin, do what makes me happy along with having a lot of fun 😛 My priorities have changed for good and I'm glad this video doesn't hit me like a storm now

[@raking7]

😂

[@aarohansharma4551]

Bruh you're just 21. You literally have your whole life. Chill😎

[@justink339]

Same 21 🙂

[@ananya_rai]

congrats, take it slow...one step at a time and you'd get there

[@oladelei.1170]

wow.

[@egloveall4166]

Dear a kid with a camera, Your choices of poems are always so beautiful. And the voice for this video was very nicely picked. We are all looking for love of some sort. And I like to believe there is a soulmate for all of us out there living their life just like we’re living ours. Keep creating, An internet friend

[@illneas]

Thank you Internet Friend so one of your wonderful comments

[@socratesandstorybooks1109]

This really helped me. Im 24 and never been in love never even kissed anyone. I always feel guilty like maybe its my fault. But this helped me to hope that maybe I just havnt found him yet.

[@saurabhissaurabh]

I am 27...

[@byronnikdem3412]

It's funny, I still remember the struggle of being a 12 -15 y/o with full of curiosity and endless anger. Now in 20s I feel nothing, I lose everything I used to love. Now I wonder what will happen in the 30s.

[@Plantlver1111]

As someone whos 15 right now i hope you’re okay, please remember that love is everywhere not just in relationships little things as a good cup of coffee, or those little graffiti bottles that are often seen in the streets, maybe even a good book, for now live ur life as happy as you can, since we only live once its best we spend it as best as we can, i may be young but appreciating the little things in life such as the environment around us is so beautiful, please dont wait until ur 30 to find those little things that make you happy, I understand what its like being in that place and sometimes it isnt easy to get out of, but spending time appreciating what we have all around us is worth it, because we dont know when it might disappear before our eyes, i hope you have a wonderful/day/night

[@byronnikdem3412]

@@Plantlver1111 keep it up. Maintain relationship with people, especially friends who are meaningful to you. I have no more countermeasures to what's happening now. I used to be able to solve many things. I tried to enjoy the present, but got let down many times. Well, it's actually because still living with parents. If you do have parents that has good impact to your emotion then it's alright. But if you have parents with unsolved past traumas that you can even see from the surface, plan your life early, it's survival time not growth time just yet. I forced myself for growth early and the outcome is satisfying for some time. I can confirm that and I'm saying this as a message to everyone with the same situation. Leave parents' house soon if you think you're capable to explore alone. I'm currently stuck and my God is my parents, their command is absolute and they're never wrong. I'm insignificant, even I left now, at least my experience stays.

[@jaredbond7908]

It's a bad path you're on.... I can't help, but it doesn't look good. Good luck to you, try new things while you still can.

[@chadgrimes252]

@Byron Nikdem the most relatable comment i seen so far, i'm in the same boat practically dead inside at this rate

[@cityofdreams23]

A big hug to every fellow 20 year old out here. Love you guys, we're in this together.

[@cosmetic8330]

i love you

[@greyheart3001]

I hope Illneas finds his soulmate.If he hasn't already.

[@illneas]

^^

[@jessamaecristobal2533]

@@illneas what does that mean :(

[@death.noneexistentchannel5797]

Lmao yeah soulmates

[@DnVFMVs]

Ur soul mate could be the same sex. Ever thought about that?

[@yoinksscoob4889]

I'm a teenager but I'm sure I'll come back to this video a few years later when I'm 20

[@ifiys7436]

same im 15

[@maya07_11]

im 12 :(

[@obstsalat8118]

i'm 17 :)

[@user-bu1wd5hz1v]

This made me laugh (in pain)

[@shivanigupta6219]

Same I am 17 :)

[@yuma7398]

I just turned 20 and it really hurts... I feel like my childhood left and I missed an important part of growing up. I don’t want my life to be like that but also don’t understand what I’m doing wrong...

[@johnle3901]

well you can look at it like racing. Formula 1 or sprinting a 100m. you won't be running on the track forever. Knowing there is an end comforts you. Death will enlighten you about the fact that age never really mattered, after all usain bolt was never scared to finish a race. knowing at some point teenagers will call you an old man or grandma if you're a girl, will show you the beauty of it, and everyone is doomed to be that way or at least only the lucky ones blessed to grow up and grow old. seeing all that, it just stops being depressing but rather kinda funny and adventurous. so if you're lucky enough to be able to have a normal life, able to go another ride around the sun, then go through your 20s enjoying every second of it, getting old is the best thing that can happen for you. if youre gonna die at some point then fuck it just keep runnin'.

[@CrazyFai]

Same

[@CameoFarmer]

I understand. I'm twenty, I dated my best friend for a few years in my teens, but it wasn't ever more than friendship. I walk around in our community park sometimes enjoying the afternoon, but I always go home unhappy because I can't help but notice the couples there, sitting on blankets together under the trees. I also feel as if my childhood has just disappeared through my fingers while I looked away and I missed it. My younger sibling is fifteen and has been dating someone for a year. They are both happy and I'm happy for them, but it reminds me of myself at fifteen...training my body to dance ballet, wandering in depression, waiting for life to start. I'm still waiting, but I'm more tired now. I've danced with ghosts in my room and fell in love with anyone who makes eye contact with me. Maybe like the author of the poem, I'll find someone a few months after writing this. I hope so. I hope you do too.

[@pypersora8690]

i genuinely looked up this exact poem earlier seeing if there was anything made from it, then an hour later i refreshed my youtube page and this had been uploaded ... absolute perfection

[@illneas]

wow nice, thank you for the compliments!

[@ashin4299]

Them : So for how long have you been single? Me : since ....birth ;-;

[@SaliniiM]

It hits you on a different level when you are way older than 20!

[@tranquilityranju383]

26 years old. still single. never been kissed or loved. I guess this is my life now with no hope and not able to burst the love kept inside. Even loving 1000 people at a time is not gonna make you feel any better.

[@fasihahrazak504]

I remember reading this poem when I was 20 and now I'm 23 nothing has changed 🥺💔

[@lotuswolf1518]

Better than being manipulated and molested I was molested multiple times by gaining consent through manipulation and coercian

[@helenamariabs]

every now and then i come back here

[@ThePurpleCosmos]

got one for 30 year olds? only kind of joking. that line about dancing alone, pretending someone was dancing with me hits so so hard

[@richardgavigan]

Yes we Do! "For 30 Year Olds Who Have Never Been Loved" kzbin.info/www/bejne/rIW5dmOvpLB6hKM

[@bekindfellowhuman]

I once read somewhere, "stop trying. stop trying to desperately find things, whether it be love or happiness or success or fame. stop trying to find them, and everything will fall into place because ultimately, the acceptance of the negative itself is an attraction to the positive."

[@rosie6]

Wonderful words❤️💕

[@shay259]

I turned 20 a couple of days ago, and gosh, this poem hits so hard. I was never the type of people who desperately want to go on dates, hold someone's hand, etc. I just didn't need it. But the older I am, the tougher life gets. I am absolutely alone studying in a foreign country. Because of covid I have never seen my classmates, I live alone, I don't meet any people. And I feel so incredibly lonely. I wish someone knew everything I am going through. I wish someone heard all my silent screams, saw my tears and heard my hysterical laughter - when I am so done with everything that I have no more tears, and laughter is all I have left. I wish someone could understand my feelings. I wish someone wanted to understand me. I desperately need a soulmate. Because right now I feel like I am alone on this planet. I have a loving family and frinds (I chat with them online). But I feel like I am on my own. And as the time passes, I have less and less strength to cope with everything alone. Don't get me wrong, I don't want a soulmate so that she would help me solve my problems. I just need someone by my side, who would believe in me, support and understand me. So that I had more strength and energy to stand up and continue fighting. But the ironic thing is, I can't even fantisize about meeting my soulmate. I can imagine the love I would give her. But I can't imagine that somebody would genuinely love me. I don't believe that someone could look at me and want to hug or kiss me. I don't believe that someone would want to spend the rest of their life with me after getting to know what kind of person I am. I don't think that I am worth loving. So I can't even escape to the fantasy world.

[@philip2772]

I'm sure you will find her one day, and maybe you will know it's right when it happens.

[@shay259]

@@philip2772 Thank you 😊❤️

[@fiend4659]

Its my birthday last week. Entering 23 year of being alive. I lock my self in my room crying and thinking to much abt my purpose. While my parents and relatives celebrates it in the other side of the door. Same household different emotions

[@SUNix0624]

I'm a shy introverted 24 yr old and wondering all this uwu

[@jorgedominguez2256]

Where you from

[@SUNix0624]

@@jorgedominguez2256 from where over october, ben&ben, mumimuni, cup of joe and the ridleys live

[@jorgedominguez2256]

@@SUNix0624 where’s that?

[@jorgedominguez2256]

@@SUNix0624 k

[@blusky3591]

@@jorgedominguez2256 That's Philippines yo

[@li43596]

I had saved this in my playlist a long ago when I got a rejection form someone I loved the most and I came to see this today again. Back then, I could connect to every single word of this piece of art, all the comments felt mine. Despite of dragging myself to wrong choices and people; today, I am in a stable, peaceful and happy relationship. And all I did was to just wait. So l have to tell you that you deserve to be loved in the most beautiful way. One day it will knock at your door too. Open the door and welcome it! I hope you all have a wonderful life!!!

[@sunset1055]

Lately i've been thinking a lot like "im 20 and still got no first kiss, still got no hand to hold and on and on" .And out of no where this video pops up in my recommendation and kinda believe that it's a message from the universe. Thank You very much

[@coltm4a186]

I’m 25, still haven’t had a woman in my life, and saw this on Valentines Day 2023. I hate being so lonely. I just want to be a father and a husband one day but having been single my entire life has made me realize that I will never be good enough for anyone at all. I feel like giving up but that brings me no peace. I really doubt that a soulmate exists for me

[@MourningNihilist]

I'm 41, and you spoke to my heart, and it feels a bit better, maybe. If I'm never loved, it's ok, she's out there, somewhere. My heart sings, knowing this, and I can't imagine she doesn't feel it too.

[@halyketarrant]

Almost 24 here and feeling so full of love that I really don’t know what to do with it. 💔 And with every year I think more and more often that maybe, I’m just not made for love. That is not my destiny. Anyone else?

[@d.pedroii2940]

Me, but I'm 22

[@adamv9784]

I feel your pain, I'm 25 and it gets so overwhelming, like it's going to suffocate me. I'm sure you'll find someone eventually tho who will appreciate you for who you are and all the love you have to give 😊

[@dwarakeshm9470]

I feel the same🥺

[@klaudia5117]

Finally, someone is showing this. I'm 19 and my only kiss was with my dog 😂

[@aptgetalife_]

i mean...i'm not 20 yet but this still hits hard, especially when you're part of a generation, where this is supposed to happen rather quickly, and people start dating when they're 14...but of course, one must always wait for the right time, and give time some TIME to work it's magic.

[@jessi8252]

14!? People started dating at like 7-8 years old at my school.

[@joythinker739]

I still have to love myself before getting into a relationship. I don't want to expect someone to love me when I barely have a good relationship with myself.

[@helenovsk]

That's sooo true It's easy to imagine how nice it must be in a romantic relationship, but in real life it's hard to believe that someone would like you in this way

[@vhkverse]

2:56 hit hard lmao. at times, i feel so guilty for ending up having feelings for just about anyone who shows basic human decency to me. my emotions are a mess, and i hope one day, I'll be able to figure them out-to figure /myself/ out. this was beautiful !! thank you for sharing :)

[@tanmaypai9876]

M a 20yr old ,I need friends but lack social skill but I can have interesting conversation on various topics, nd I dk who I am ,what I stand for but m getting ok with that fact

[@bunniesarerunning5219]

you sound like such a lovely person.i hope your tribe finds you soon❤

[@notavailable708]

Are you spiritual?

[@tanishatanvi4343]

Don't worry brother first find a reason to love yourself. People themselve will start to love you.

[@midhattasneem7101]

2:56 I felt wrong. I feel wrong even now. So wrong, when I end up liking every new person I literally meet. I feel like my emotions are mess. That I am a mess. These words comforted me. I am trying to love myself first. I hope I succeed one day. I hope we all find our soulmates but before that we fall in love with our own soul 💚 Thank you.

[@cha-cha2223]

I admit I'm scared to commit, to let someone in. I'm scared of love, but I want to feel loved.

[@Eggwrite]

Well ya called me out on the bit when I'm fantasizing dancing with a lover. This poem does a great job at being relatable.

[@illneas]

Please continue dancing!

[@Eggwrite]

@@illneas that I shall

[@roisinfairydust8852]

i'll be turning 20 this year and this poem hits me so hard. i've never been loved, only used and manipulated and hurt by people who then leave, and it fuckin hurts and i just wish things will get better.. loved this poem, thankyou so much for this. big love xx

[@blau6273]

🤝

[@Rin-ux9oi]

Sameeee

[@coffintears5821]

Love is for losers

[@gourashgoyal2203]

Turning 20 this March and have no friends to wish me, not even loved by my own family, but thats ok i believe that there is someone far away who'll meet me someday and we both would fall in love with each other.. i believe! Thanks for reading 🤗 Hope you all have a great life ahead!

[@aellax7481]

I wish you an early happy birthday🎂🎉🎁

[@gourashgoyal2203]

@@aellax7481 Thank you so much for the birthday wish, it means a lot! ☺️🙂

[@aellax7481]

@@gourashgoyal2203 🧡

[@user-bu1wd5hz1v]

Ay, happy birthday I hope u could enjoy it!❤️

[@AlexHenrybl]

Happiee birthday dear ❤(march 2023)

[@kym5314]

Fuck. I’ll be 20 in less than a month and I feel personally attacked.

[@dalnim3532]

Happy birthday 🎉🎂

[@khyati7733]

Ill be 21 in a month...🙃

[@kym5314]

@@dalnim3532 awww thank you :*** 💖💕💗💗💘

[@kym5314]

@@khyati7733 Happy early birthday :))) 🎈

[@mer7708]

Me too

[@zahanbarak9854]

Love you people ❤️ keep loving poetry...lets make this world a bit better... ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@Saturns48]

Means more when 4 decades have passed and you realize you may have never truly loved anyone and no one has ever truly loved you...maybe more time is needed😶❤

[@daylanfuentez2657]

Stay positive never go negative on yourself

[@eirotica]

i come back to this video once again. i can remember every single time i’ve listened to this poem, every single time i cried myself to sleep listening to it. but now, i come back to say that i can finally relate to the last part of this beautiful poem. and i want to thank the poet for writing this, for it kept me company until my special someone arrived.

[@Forit26]

I’m happy for you❤️

[@coltm4a186]

Im 25 and I want it to be my time already. I’m alone and it was valentines day when I saw this and it hurts even more. I want to be a father and a husband one day but how can that ever be if I have never been with a woman at all? I want a soulmate already

[@guccipucci3941]

I remember telling myself something similar when I was around 18-19 thinking that love was a bit slower for me and that I’d have to be patient, that there’s be someone out there. Now my 25th birthday is coming up and nothing has changed. These types of videos are like astrology; easy for the broad masses to project themselves onto, but in the end only cold reading based on average statistics that will not come true for everyone. Some of you here will fall through the cracks, no matter what this poem promises you. Be wary of people giving false hopes

[@princeeden2314]

Your comment made me think.. maybe I should build my life on something more durable than romantic love. It's too ephemeral and random, idk if this makes sense

[@TomatrontheOne]

One time my colleague hugged me after an incident at work. That was the first hug I’ve had in six years. I refused to let her go for a full minute because I didn’t want to go another 6 years without feeling loved again That was a year ago

[@ananya_rai]

Listening to this I first felt brave and happy that there are indeed other people out there who feel the same way, who are afraid of being alone their whole lives...but at the same time it makes me sad that albeit having so many people who feel the same way I've never met them...that there's no way for me to connect to them. That even after knowing i am not alone i still would remain alone for the rest of my life coz I could never meet these people. Like knowing that there exists life forms in some distant part of the galaxy but you could never meet them, you feel happy and seen that they exist but can't reach out to them ever.

[@stillrollin24]

All i can say to that is .... 'Padhai karlo thora' #KotaFactory

[@sushi_takoyaki143]

23 and never been in a relationship, never been kissed. It doesn't bother me anymore like it used to. I grew out of my vulnerable self. I think being in a relationship is additional workload. I am way too tired and lazy to reply messages on-time and sometimes even groom and maintain myself after a long day. What more trying to maintain a relationship. Plus, I am completely at peace on my own and I don't think I'll ever have the need to tie with somebody anymore. I'm afraid it'll just ruin my peace.

[@poshbasilisk]

Am I antisocial or is it okay to not want human contact. I personally have no friends rn and I think having friends is just going to ruin the peace

[@sushi_takoyaki143]

@@poshbasilisk Living in solitude can be okay depending on the circumstances. But having at least a few trusted friends or family to talk to is a healthy and important part of human life. We humans are social beings to begin with. But when it comes to intimate and romantic relationships, I'd rather steer clear for now.

[@poshbasilisk]

@@sushi_takoyaki143 I do talk to my family now and then. As for friends I don't think I am too friendly or fun to be around. In the past everyone I knew wanted something from me and I thought it was friendship. Once I was no use to them we drifted apart and like that I have no friends. I find it hard to trust anyone so I just stay away from people. But I do feel miserable most of the time.

[@sushi_takoyaki143]

@@poshbasilisk I have similar experience. That's why when I have friends, I keep my circle really small.

[@poshbasilisk]

@@sushi_takoyaki143maybe I'll try. Thanks for the advice.

[@shubhamvernekar6547]

"Falling in love with dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism", as much as I hate to admit this sentence, this line cuts deep. Thanks

[@restlessbeing7037]

I am turning 21 next week and this video was randomly recommended to me. That hits hard

[@thenoobimator4723]

This hits harder as an INFP. I’m 21, never had an intimate relationship with someone before. As an INFP, I always daydream and have my own thought of a perfect relationship, and that makes it harder to let myself get into a real relationship. I mean, there are few people who confessed to me that they like me, but I don’t get the same feeling for them and I won’t let it happen cause I know it will never work since love should be a reciprocation. And whenever I like someone, it happens that we don’t share the same feeling. And that leads me again into daydreaming of having a perfect relationship. I hate it cause I feel like it hinders me on knowing someone that I ignore that I might find a strong connection with. Or who knows, maybe I’m not meant to have an intimate relationship with someone, but rather be a good friend to anyone.

[@fuutoshinbir7408]

Omg I feel the exact same way and I am also an INFP wowww

[@owens.studios]

Turned twenty just ten days ago and I've felt this way for so long. Those small crushes on random people walking down the street, thinking to myself if they're the one or imagining if I were walking beside them, hand in hand. I hate having that feeling and I try to fight it after every "interaction". Being so lonely and desperate for a significant other that imagining a future with the complete stranger sitting across from me doesn't surprise me at all. I pretty much wish for those interactions, trying to look my best for strangers in hopes that I'll be the one sticking out amongst the crowd. I hate having that mentality because I know I'm just setting myself up for disappointment, but there's always the "what if?" in the the back of my mind

[@Forit26]

Bro what if you just tried to talk to strangers, to build up confidence and reduce loneliness, it could lead to friendships or even relationships. Realistically, lots of people live this way, this *is* a pretty isolated world for lots due to social media. Why don’t you try being the connector? It may be risky, but i’m sure it could help at least

[@user-dd1hc3ms3q]

It's the middle of the night, and these thoughts have come back to haunt me once again. I often wonder, "How does it feel to love someone who loves you back?" "What is being in love feels like?" "Am I ever gonna experience it?" I just wanna fall in love with someone who can love me back as well. I just want to experience what being in love feels like. I just want to be loved. Is this all too much to ask?

[@adamv9784]

I ask myself the same all the time. The worst part is seeing everyone else getting into relationships and making it look so effortless, it just comes naturally for them. Why not me? What's wrong with me?

[@Diana-gt1rv]

This poem is so extraordinarily meaningful and the cover pictures are just gorgeous. Yes, some day in life you will meet your soulmate and you will know it when you meet him or her. There’s always one person in this big world who understands and loves you as the person you are and you don’t even need to talk, you just feel it.

[@neferm0re]

I'm still crying... It's so painful to be in this srate, because it feels like it will never end and it's hard, in the present, to believe that soulmates exist...

[@emery7554]

to all of yall in the comments: you deserve to be loved

[@churchboy12underwear]

you too💞

[@coltm4a186]

I used to think that for myself. 25 and nobody. I have friends but never got past that. Im not good enough to find and marry a special lady and be a husband and father.

[@JN-bg9vu]

KZbin recommend this to me.. I'm at my lowest. I just turned 23 a week ago, I have a good job I'm working in a customer service.. I have a healthy and loving family and friends... I have been surrounded by wonderful people when suddenly while working I feel empty inside. Feels like There's a hole inside my heart. Something's missing but I can't identify. I have everything I could wish for. I'm full of laughter and happiness at work but I came home and I lay on my cold dark room.. that's when I started crying... Untill now as I typed this.

[@Countrysideboy247]

22 year old male here and my 17 year old brother already found true love. I still question myself if I would ever find love.

[@samuelmichalcewicz7852]

27, male military member, and this piece of media made me cry.

[@Forit26]

I thank you for your service 🫡

[@mymayjunejuly9487]

the fact that i didn't search this up but youtube itself recommended me who's turning 20 next month 🚶🏻‍♀️

[@caroljung1310]

Two years ago, when I turned twenty, I felt exactly this way. That year, I met my best friend, my soulmate, and now: my lover.

[@gresiim8104]

I turn 20 next month. This video hit very very hard. I'm so glad I searched it up. I was feeling lonely and this gave me exactly what I needed: a good cry. I'm sitting on the bathroom floor or walking around, crying as I listen. I've listened twice by now. Every single line is so true. I have so much love to give. It's so bottled up. I'm such a hopeless romantic, and I keep waiting, waiting, waiting, dreaming of the day the wait will end. I daydream about love so much it hurts. It's on my mind all the time. Will it ever end? Is this my fight? Is this how it's going to be years going forward? Perhaps all my life? Why is it so difficult to meet someone? I don't know. They say you have to love yourself first, and that I did. I'm much more confident. I have too much love to only keep for myself though, I want to share, but with who? Is it so wrong wanting to share love? I'll wipe away my tears now, get up, go on with my life. Still loveless, craving someone I've never met every single second of my life.

[@srinjoypaul3676]

"And wait for it to happen". You just can't do anything else.

[@livelovelaugh224]

I’m 20 and this is how I feel, like by line each moment is described so beautifully like the person has seen me in the depths of my heart and mind.

[@anuragraj4887]

I could not even express much.I always value people take care,try to make them happy inspite of them I feel so lonely like no one cares for me.In simple words this feeling and reality sucks.🥺😭

[@wickedwoopie6432]

The title made me tear up. I’m turning 20 next month and I’ve never had a boyfriend. I’ve been in love, that’s for sure, but it’s never gone my way. I hate to admit it but I sometimes feel like there’s something wrong with me. I often say that I don’t mind being alone, which is true. I’ve been alone my entire life so why would I mind? However, sometimes when I see couples holding hands etc. I catch myself wanting that too ;-;

[@Forit26]

There's nothing wrong with you, it just isn't your time yet, but don't take this as a sign of "it hasn't come to you yet", sometimes you gotta take action and approach someone you like yourself. Making the first move makes the difference

[@drishtibajaj]

"for you, falling in love with a dozens of people a day was a coping mechanism for not having anyone to love you in return" I have never felt this understood before. *sobs* Also this reminds me of one of my favorite songs by hozier, I fall in love just a lil o lil bit everyday with someone new ♡♡♡

[@VasilikiTzalachanihappy]

Now, I'm crying...that was so beautiful and relatable. I feel our generation is the generation of superficial love and friendships and soul-crushing loneliness deep withn.

[@jennifermunoz1203]

This this is just what I wanted to say but never had the words for it thank you for saying it for me - a 20 year old who just feels exactly like this

[@naheenisapoet69]

being 19 and a lsot poet who hasn't gotten over the little summer I gave my heart to someone only to be returned in pieces, this was comforting to hear. Still I feel like I am contradicting myself as I may never want love again because it feels as though I don't desrve it and can't have it without tearing me further. Losing your first love after such a difficult decision which I passed and failed to say yes , it feels impossible to love again.

[@thyvalli89]

Someone else's eyes boring into yours. This line sums up intimacy, I hope I can experience it one day.

[@xatiter]

Damn. This hits, especially during quarantine. Imma go cry under my blankets now....

[@realitycheck4746]

I'm a 26 year old dude, I've been in six bad relationships, and I have never truly been loved once. Honestly, stay single. It is the best advice I can give you. People suck and only want to be in relationships for selfish reasons. They don't love you, but love what you can do for them. They don't care about your bad experiences and only care about your good ones, so they can feel good. People won't hesitate to take advantage of you. We live in a selfish, loveless world, so you better adapt. This is the sad reality we live in.

[@tuhinabagga5439]

It's odd how even the simplest of words can crawl right through your heart and make it warm. I think whenever I come here and look at these vids I feel a sense of hope for myself. Thank you.

[@kern_es]

I'll come back and watch this when I'm 20.

[@shenowvlok7436]

Me too

[@aaA-on3ie]

Same.

[@RareKami]

Had hope when I turned 19 now I’m going to be 24 in March never been In a relationship and literally 0 friends because all my childhood friends I use to chill with all the time switched up on me life sucks sometimes man.

[@RareKami]

All that and more put me in a really bad depression. 24/7 is just bad thoughts and no motivation to do anything.

[@Forit26]

@@RareKami Bro you need to discover the wonder of working on yourself, start a skincare routine, workout, read, do something that excites you. You’ll rediscover your worth and your unlimited potential.

[@Forit26]

Never lose hope. “In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself, that’s what it means to be strong❤️”

[@prachimehra4206]

I’m glad this video popped up in my recommendations. The title is exactly my life. This spoke to the depths of my heart and desires. I now know that I’m not alone for feeling this way.

[@roche8395]

This really hit my heart I just sat in my bed thinking nobody has even liked me before I’m 21 and I’m just lonely

[@Forit26]

Hey idk if my experience as a guy counts, but i have personally like lots of girls without them ever finding out. There may have been lots of guys/girl that have liked you, but they may have been too shy/afraid to talk to you because fair of rejection. And i think that if you like someone that they don’t need to like you instantly for it to be able to become a relationship. It could blossom into love if you get to know each other. Maybe going on a couple dates or befriending them could lead to something more❤

[@camillekesseyrelatorres7377]

Maybe the universe have heard my weepings and subtly directed me to this video to calm me down. To make me realize that my thoughts have been so loud that i couldn't hear myself well. Thank you for this video.♥ It has given words for my overwhelming thoughts.

[@being-sapient]

Wow.. I haven't had someone like that in my life, but i'm really lucky to not feel alone. Because, i don't think you'll feel lonely when you are living with your mom. That love is just so pure :) But i'm curious to feel and know what it's like to be loved by someone as their "The One", and to give back my heart.❤

[@anastasiantr1226]

I was searching for a video like this for a long time. Someone to speak to my soul, someone that I can relate to and many days after finally I found it. Thank you! These were words I needed to hear. - a 20 year old 🌼

[@mariazitamako4950]

Okay, you made me cry. Amazing job, it was mesmerising, it was pure perfection. I especially loved the cats, they made my heart melt even more. 💖