Whitebread Mayonnaise Snailtrail - Ep. 60

[@Kanto0o]

I can't imagine dying, being cremated, and then being used as a prop for Sam's torturous designs.

[@KalleJalmariNevanpera9230]

There is no God.

[@CyrusL]

@@KalleJalmariNevanpera9230 oh but there is a god and his punishment for this woman is being a prop for Sam

[@einar_476]

At least someone will remember you....

[@blacksuitnotie]

I think her family left her behind cuz they didn't really like her. If that's the case, she's getting what she deserves.

[@dayastello630]

To think she’s more famous after death

[@coler6555]

Poor Margaret. The horrors she must witness in that office….

[@notyours5780]

Bro even Margaret forgot about Margaret

[@goblin8623]

The horror she witnesses when Sam crushes his chode to a bloody pulp in his autoblow ai

[@zwackseef4031]

i wonder if she likes eel soup...

[@BLACKNAVYSEAL13]

@@goblin8623 펴채해햍ㅎ켷ㅋㅎ켷켷켷켜혘ㅋ혘ㅎㅋㅎㅋㅎㅋ행해해햏애해애햏ㅋㅌㅎ래ㅛㅐㅛㄹ

[@michaelmcarthur2944]

Yeah but she's getting a mech body from sam

[@speltax5598]

Poob has given so many specific details about his Highschool that it's only a matter of time before someone finds out the exact one.

[@josephpoorman9871]

He once said something about "only Popeyes in such and such area". I'm certain you Can triangulate an area of Indiana he lives in. He for sure lives in Indiana

[@Sue_Me_Too]

@@josephpoorman9871 Lol oh god, fucking driving around neighborhoods honking the car horn while he's streaming to find the exact house

[@WhyGodby]

someone needs to do a poob stories compilation

[@lapeez2277]

not like theres that many highschools in indiana or whatever

[@theceoofcrackcocaineandamp5961]

@@lapeez2277 there’s two, columbine and Harvard.

[@saltylemon4436]

I think the best part about this podcast is that you guys talk about nothing it just feels like I'm muted in a discord call with 3 people arguing with each other.

[@mikestavisky8009]

I have friends now!!!!

[@sting-e4494]

@@koolaidman4869 lemme get in on that I'm miserable

[@deathstramy7272]

Exactly it lets me escape my crippling lack of friends!

[@steppecist2928]

The fact you can watch these podcasts from the original brother one and track Zacks failing marriage is really something

[@GhostBusters815]

The lore grows deeper and deeper with every podcast lmao 🤣

[@Will-jb7dd]

@@daraygona7058 speaking from experience, he shoulda left the state. Once a crazy bitch, always a crazy bitch.

[@aaron4820]

20:25 Hey guys, I just want to to tell you all that my life has reached a point where I pay $5 a month to listen to 3 guys talk about their taxes.

[@sawyerbuss637]

The American dream

[@slomnim]

Bryan is 90% laugh track and 10% commenter psychic medium

[@TemperateGreenBananaClassic]

Bryan really is just a glorified laugh track

[@thelonewanderer69]

And the podcast wouldn't be the same without him

[@succman8398]

I love how Sam is essentially dressing a corpse and parading it around like a toy. That person must be so disappointed

[@AUniqueHandleName444]

I hope my corpse gets the star treatment like that one.

[@callmecalvin7297]

Dude, Marge is bing fucking chilling man. Give it like three years of this and her lingering consciousness will finally begin to understand how good she's got it as a corpse after her apparent cunt life. Dressed up modestly as a mannequin, not getting pissed on essentially just having to witness a husband/father of two wack his gack and say dumb stuff

[@Aaron067]

Better than being dust, collecting dust. I would love to be paraded around. Like, I would literally be too dead to care.

[@kevynwolf]

I fucking hate myself for how hard I laughed at the bed pissing and shitting segment.

[@tyleraikin1142]

dude i was fuckin crying

[@AnalBajanal]

Can i get a glass of apple juice for no particular reason at all

[@akimbojim7366]

Dude yes I haven't laughed that hard in a while since the symbiote episode

[@regyr081]

@@akimbojim7366 Which one is the simbiote episode?

[@akimbojim7366]

@@regyr081 it was a patreon episode where Steve and a few other discord people commuted to Sam in Florida and one of them is telling what happened during the car ride

[@igormichetti]

Sam should make a video about a journey through the country to release Margaret's ashes in a cool ass place, just like he did with Cripps in RDR2

[@C_R112]

Nah this is her purgatory

[@Ashephalt]

That’s a cool idea, the problem is he’s unhealthy as shit, that’s why he failed doing that tiny portion of the AT twice.

[@moe7808]

@@Ashephalt during the camping vlog they should complete the trail and release the ashes together at the end

[@Ashephalt]

@@moe7808 if they ever do the camping video.

[@Jimppin]

@@moe7808 Walking 6 months in the woods, Sam? That's a good one

[@humble1107]

sorry to hear about Zack, I guess that's what happens when you marry someone after you knocked them up

[@TigerLaRoar]

People down in the bible belt usually marry the baby mama and then won't get divorced because they are taught "divorce bad" and be miserable together for the rest of their lives.

[@jackvernian7779]

@@TigerLaRoar but then they reconsider and divorce

[@neonsamurai5637]

Maybe he shouldn't have knocked up a girl from tinder after 4 months of dating

[@Cristian-nn5jj]

@@TigerLaRoar they are taught "divorce bad" because "divorce bad". The solution is don't treat marriage as if its a small thing.

[@brandonmeens]

@@Cristian-nn5jj facts

[@andreadams6115]

I'm not sure I understand the hate. It's been clear from the beginning that the podcast is just ready access to well polished dog shit

[@YoursTruIy_]

Poor Zack got absolutely shit on this time around

[@michaelmcarthur2944]

He did say he met her and then they decided to have a kid after like 3 months.

[@YoursTruIy_]

I’m pretty sure Zack’s MO was mostly to have a kid it sounds like - the woman was just a vestal for his genes

[@Bobkabob]

"You're just like some nakey jakey rip off derivative POS. You got no talent, the writing's cringey, you're propped up by Jippy, on the podcast you're propped up by Poob, the editing is propped up by Stalltt, your life is propped up by Abby. YOU'RE NOTHING"

[@mikestavisky8009]

Thank you!!! U saved me the trouble lol

[@jimbomclimbo7467]

Why are general sam fans so mean?

[@gunship0995]

@@jimbomclimbo7467 The feeling of revenge will be so sweet if you become more successful than your bullies. We're just prepping up Sam boy to be a great spiteful man.

[@hope6840]

Very based Sam gonna kill himself now

[@clickbaitcancer120]

@@gunship0995 Kinda loses the impact when you're already more succesful than them tho

[@JonathanRipoff]

A new podcast comes out as soon as I start craving one.

[@JamesSmith-cv9di]

The "I'll put in work when you do" text is an editor's "I'm not mad, just disappointed"

[@dylandubz8925]

Two episodes in a week? He really is about to frontload the podcast and go silent for months

[@fellowgamer5363]

The cum town way

[@joecool2721]

@@fellowgamer5363 hell yeah dude

[@GregoryMcStevens]

I feel like Sam is a bit too enthusiastic about owning another human only a matter of time before he gets his hands on an alive one

[@musiconly7636]

The 20 minutes of that failed episode is almost on par with this full episode, they’ve become so unorthodox that it’s so bad it’s good prove me wrong.

[@cewic4909]

What failed episode

[@Virgo559]

Bryan's getting closer and closer to his "Sword Art Online" Kirito cosplay.

[@Vantaz]

I feel like bryan has finally come into his own

[@notliterallyme]

he should really go clean that up

[@DarkCourier]

Sam trying to be secret while hitting the pen is the best 😂😂

[@insgrosky9861]

Timestamp where?

[@harrypnun7218]

48:59

[@arthurtinel2685]

is it a weed pen or a nic vape?

[@edwingonzalez7691]

@@arthurtinel2685 probably delta8 THC because Florida is medical only i think

[@grimreefer9324]

I'm actually very surprised at Sam opening up about how KZbin impacts mental health and self-esteem. Takes a pretty big man to admit shit like being in a slump because of a negativity bias towards criticism to your friends, let alone to tens or hundreds of thousands of viewers. And Sam is NOTHING if not a very very big man.

[@ThisShitIsWeird]

A very VERY big large man

[@Will-jb7dd]

Sam is a noble knight of the internet. He says things as they are, without pandering to useless cunts. And this is the hero that the world needs. Long live the king of foreheads.

[@shiftyjim4138]

The largest man I know.

[@sheenvr5986]

You mean every youtuber and streamer to try and get sympathy money?

[@murphymcpoyle1735]

I can't believe Zach's marriage didn't work out, I thought tinder was the best place to find a wife.

[@melmelhodgepodge3800]

I find it wild that he knocked someone up in this day and age.

[@punishedbung4902]

Sam uses his new mother in law like the fistful of ashes in Sekiro.

[@bignig7223]

That shits op lmao

[@mikestavisky8009]

Ha

[@TigerLaRoar]

The Poobs dad pooping the bed bit was my giggle of the year. That was so fucking funny I had to pull over I was laughing so hard. Yet another great podcast 👍

[@mr.serious4329]

fire ants are an invasive species, in my book poob is a hero.

[@distantlol]

poob was already a hero, this just confirms that he will go to extreme lengths to complete his goal, i.e. a rambo like figure

[@grimace4257]

True American hero*

[@joshj1420]

This just brought back a weird memory from my childhood. Idk how i forgot this. As a child i was terrified of manikins because believed that souls were trapped in them.

[@brandonmeens]

You might be on to something there

[@Bee_Tea_Sea]

Between this and gamer hole, where as that is fully unwatchable, this show here is just watchable enough for me to have it on and not want to unsub and hang myself. No more, no less

[@jeffbezos2960]

Says the guys with 36 comments on the channel

[@Bee_Tea_Sea]

Its just a prank vro

[@asphaltape]

sam's lighting makes him look like he's being interrogated but the good cop slightly dimmed the lamp

[@DarkauronCZ]

it would actually be really cool if you brought jippy on the podcast. i think this audience would appreciate it.

[@cameronreece5801]

My middle school woodshop teacher used to threaten the students by saying he is going to slit our jugular all the time. One day i told another teacher that i was going to slit his jugular and they put me in in school suspension for weeks. I got out and told the woodshop teacher about it and he laughed for hours. What a cool guy

[@sk8rddy957]

“Shittin and wrestlin, you know how it is.” I can’t stop crying

[@EnviousGenome]

These podcasts are my main source of humor and as such I very much appreciate the time that you three put into them. Though I wish the main channel would get more attention. Thank you.

[@TheRealSkeetman]

I've put off watching this one for a while whenever it came up in my feed because of the title, it's about what i expected, good job gang 👍

[@longtong9039]

You know what Sam? I’ve been watching these since day dot, and i haven’t seen your hairline recede to behind your ears yet. I was honestly expecting it to just travel so far back the the line becomes perpendicular to your glasses. When people would say “hey, nice hairline” they would mean it in the most literal way possible. But no, you look as average as ever! So great job Staltt for tirelessly editing out Sam’s Sméagolish follicle recession and ensuring he doesn’t decent into a mind numbing state of terminal depression, when people say you arent putting 100 percent in, they just arent aware of how often you have to keyframe that Easter Island head of a man

[@evolutionarydeadend6812]

You guys are my favorite podcast. You're not people to me. Just great content. Thanks! (:

[@V3N0M460]

Damn, i feel sorry for Zack he seemed really happy there for a time, especially with his son, i hope he’s doing better

[@BreddyK]

The podcast is great. Really love the bits where you guys shit talk us patrons.

[@MoringAfterStar]

Stallt my main man, you keep this whole boat floating. Glad to see you can keep these idiots going! ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[@wgairborne209]

finally, an episode with no cringy guest, just the wonderful trio

[@codalienx3101]

Keep up the good work. You guys bring me laughs every month. Thanks :)

[@catpowers9932]

my favorite sci-fi method of space travel is temporary artificial wormholes, close runner ups are the warhammer 40k style where you take a shortcut through hell, or the mass effect style.

[@C0necat]

Staltt is the funniest member of the podcast

[@randomdude1194]

"We need to incorporate Jippy into these" Me playing Jippy in the background.

[@CosmoCrank]

Love me some Bryan. Really cool of him to let these two neuro-divergent lads on the podcast.

[@martinwilliams1308]

Great episode! Love it when you guys talk about growing up in bumfuck nowhere america and pretty much reinact every stereotype europeans have of americans

[@henrychristensen6374]

Good Ep lads and glad to see Sams childhood ninja skills aren't lost with stealth vape hits like that.

[@rook5503]

Poor Zach, I've been following his tale and he had such a bright outlook

[@megu2328]

I pissed in my friends fridge one time while drunk, friends tried cleaning it as best as they could, but the next morning their parents opened the cooler and the vegetables were flooded in piss.

[@bigjizz6997]

You have some strange lies lambert

[@elgringofeo9348]

Margaret and Larry are the irl equivalents of alfonse from full metal alchemist

[@evronian1129]

I've watched so many of these episodes I'm beginning to incur Poob's personality. Truly a fate worse than death.

[@arthurgoonie4596]

Forehead fables is my asmr is like falling asleep on a camping trip

[@Awesomewithaz]

If I send Sam my Dad's ashes, would he let them Margaret hang out with my Dad. He's been lonely since he died.

[@insgrosky9861]

Yes, he made an offer in one of his videos for anyone to send them on down.

[@brandonmeens]

Maybe I’ll send him the ashes of one of my childhood pets so they have have a little lap dog 🙂

[@thegamekiller3891]

I love that sam rips a DP at 48:58 like Staltz wouldn't see Sam skulking around

[@papawade3103]

Stories from their childhood could absolutely be turned into a series. 110% would watch

[@TunaSam2314]

That teacher was working through his Vietnam trauma. I feel bad for him.

[@swosels]

this podcast makes me feel less lonely while I'm on drugs

[@das123d]

Pay Poob well, he is easily the funniest man on the podcast.

[@Furko08]

no one might read this but the part where they kept going on and on about Poob's father pissing the bed and spilling apple juice on him, I was laughing so hard I had to lay down on the floor and my stomach hurts bad now

[@anarchistgold8023]

I dont listen to podcasts but I'm here commenting, listening, and enjoying a video of three dudes who like to talk about life. Stalt is funny with the secret captions.

[@oiledupcustode9948]

Sam is going to discover how to trap souls into mannequins then move on to animatronics and become the man behind the slaughter

[@DunningofKruger]

I made the mistake of drinking pepsi while listening to the tootsie roll story. Now I’m bent over the sink coughing and vomiting in tears while Poob makes slapstick noises. I’m going to get pneumonia and it’s your guy’s fault. 10/10 would listen to childhood shit stories again.

[@GhostBusters815]

I dont understand the hate I always just felt like it was dudes hanging out talking shit and there is nothing wrong with that sometimes it gets super fucking funny and the convos get deep enough for inside jokes lol

[@MangoMan139]

1:31:37 i have in fact gone to a girls house after dinner and pissed the bed. It was horrifying to have to wake her up at 7am and tell her i pissed the bed

[@PB_TheOldGuard]

1:05:55 I this was a jump scare on Sam's camera when they were talking about the lady in the water tank! Just a glitch in the feed.

[@tavarfirestone7573]

I love listening to yall's ramblings genuinely hilarious as far as im concerned

[@quiteindeed6809]

Sam should put a rolled up dollar bill into Margret's ashes, to both pay her for being on the podcast, and to insinuate that someone was snorting her ashes when someone finds them later down the line.(pun intended)

[@esparttt]

id just like to say that poob's apple juice and snickers bit just might rival the coding class story from "our crusty holes" in terms of the funniest bits from the podcast. it got to the point where I was like failing to breath in and I nearly passed out from laughter after he just kept going with it. this episode was an S+ for me definitely

[@porkyorcy1715]

it's cool when sam randomly talks about really interesting shit like that blacksmithing stuff

[@DeadSpacedOut]

i love that, at LEAST 1/3 of this episode is about shittin n pissin.

[@almahiad4530]

Cool, Im brazilian and the first time sam mentions my country he’s on a rampage about buying monkeys out of magazines.

[@mr.meanwhile]

It's incredible how the bugs that kids get are almost on the level of weaponized anthrax. And they survive that shit.

[@thebamb00zler6]

I love how sam just basically told us the elementary school he went to in the last 5 minutes

[@MrGoodvillain]

I used to have the same reoccurring dream of falling into one of those dark ass water towers, but it would always be like draining or something to make it suck you down and unable to swim away.

[@justmonty383]

Sorry to hear the work you're doing isn't going as well, though another good podcast! take care and stay in good health.

[@matthewmays9203]

"why? is she gonna move?" Killed me

[@DriGuy]

I made a paper machae of my gramps ashes. Mixed in some tobacco and used whiskey water. No he’s always with me, and has just as much liquor in em as before.

[@mikestavisky8009]

I put you guys on so people think my friends are here.... and so I don't feel so cold and alone.

[@lachlanboyd5072]

Poobs moustache looks like a bigger version of his eyebrows

[@Hackedschema28906]

Can’t wait for Margaret’s enraged ghost to come on the podcast.

[@davet80000]

its now canon that they submit their entire pod to stalltt via teddy bear delivery, and he has to edit from that cassette original. its amazing that it sounds this good man, well done!

[@SkyTheBear]

“Oh god is that racist?” Great start guys 👍

[@melmelhodgepodge3800]

That story about the lady in the water tank was Elisa Lamm. It was in LA and it wasn't an apartment building but it was a hotel.

[@Optagonapus]

They should bring Zack back on the podcast

[@michaelmcarthur2944]

Sounds like he might be in a pretty bad place rn

[@Optagonapus]

@@michaelmcarthur2944 the podcast can only help

[@mikestavisky8009]

"A perpetual flinch.... you know like a seizure"

[@Jitsuman]

He started life as Sam but after staring in the airsoft rendition of “Deer Hunter” he is only known as Poob.

[@kieran6417]

We love you stalltt

[@Icytits]

I think your writing and comedic style compliments jippy's music just as much as his music compliments your videos. Like the sour cream to a taco.

[@krelekari]

sams childhood memory story about the grain silo's made every midwesterner tense up in tandem

[@OddTJ]

This was a good episode from a material perspective, but Stalt's commentary was on point.

[@jeckelvhydefro-m-e]

Great podcast. Every episode. 50:35 you and your brother use to say you ran the neighborhood like a shister.

[@colin8526]

can't drink while watching the podcast cause the likelihood of me spitting it out is about 80%

[@Maikologi]

It’s weird that people forget they live next to like some of the most dangerous common creatures that actively don’t fuckin like humans (gators and crocodiles) Like we just LIVE next to GIANT LIZARDS

[@associate8265]

hilarious podcast as always sam sam and bryan

[@maxbale3091]

That shit about the apple juice and pissing the bed had me dying.

[@noahsharpe3647]

This is one of the best episodes to date

[@NickNM1921]

My old boss lives in a Sears house. They would ship you the blue prints and the exact materials

[@GrannyHumper1]

They say people complain about long periods of time between episodes, but to me it's a nice little surprise

[@mistahslugg]

yo STALT, thanks for those timestamps brother. I wish everybody did that with pcasts