FTM gender Transition - Starting to become my authentic self

Discussing my evolving thoughts and feelings about my gender identity and gender expression and where I currently find myself on the spectrum at 4 weeks on Testosterone. I plan to revist this throughout my trasition as my identity emerges :)
Extra links for info
www.plannedpare...
freethoughtblog...

[@eundongpark1672]

I love this video 'cause so much about it I understand and it's such a relief to hear someone else express it. You're doing such a great job of highlighting the ambiguity of pinning down identity especially where language and social norms don't help. There is so much pressure to be one end or the other of the spectrum. The fact that society is gradually becoming more comfortable with splitting out gender identity, sexuality and expression is very helpful. (tiny fontm but I also think that even three variables is probaby not enough to fully articulate what out diverse populations experience, not that I'm complaining)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you very much my friend. Im loving the experience of finally becoming my true self, what a gift, it makes all the hard times worthwhile :)

[@astrog8tr]

Thanks Finn! Glad you liked my video. Love the support group! I love the sharing of bro-hood with my fellow trans guys many of whom are also out.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you Caleb, Im growing so much already lol! In just 14 months Ive changed so much and now starting the T journey things are happening fast so Im really excited to see where its going to take me.

[@sambroyd693]

OMG mate, I can so relate to what you said in this vlog. You are keeping me going at the moment, and look forward to each of your new video's. I also watched your very first vlog, and you can so see the difference in you now. I am so grateful you decided to video your trans life, as it is so educational, and makes me realise I'm not the only one. Which it feels like sometimes.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hey my friend, you always have such great info! Will be interesting to see what happens to my camp levels!! My sentences are already shorter....well, except in videos!!! Interesting ride indeed. Thanks so much my friend :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hi Kaiden, thanks for the congrats, these 4 weeks have flown by! Will do an update on friday :) My lower half isnt an issue at all now that T had given me a crazy libido! But yeaj....like you....the top half is just awful...thanks for your comments :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hi Connor, glad my vids help :) I watched my first one recently.....what a change! Vlogging really helped my confidence and Ive come a long way since then, T will take me even further forward! Your definately not the only one dude. Thanks for your lovely comments :)

[@astrog8tr]

I totally relate to this! Actually did my 7 week video on this. I struggled to explain this whole thing. I'm in an FTM support group. Feels like being surrounded by gay guys. We were socialized as female. I feel quite comfortable with identifying as transgender. You did a great job (as usual Finn).

[@Zafiee]

Grats on 4 weeks on T, man! Glad your able to express yourself and I also agree that the lower half isn't that big of an issue. The top half on the other hand is definitely an issue.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hey mate, yes thats exactly where I am with it. if anything, Im leaning towrds meta, but a lot can happen with medical science in a short space of time so am just going to wait and see what transpires! thanks for your comments :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so very much Mel :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

hell sir!!! :D Nat is going to do a vid with me at the weekend, her perspective on month 1, so I will ask her that for you! And yes, many cis peeps are trapped by the expectations put on them to act a certian way and so as you quite rightly say, will repress those things. We are naturally a balance of masculine and feminine and I intend to celebrate that! Thank you for your awesome comments my awesome friend!

[@AndyMcKeever12]

How has Nat observed your "softer" qualities to be now? Btw, I love that you enjoy exploring things about yourself. I think that cis-men have many feminine qualities, but don't let them escape because of peer pressure. So, just figure that even though you may feel you have more of those then you'd like, most people won't notice. I hope when you feel you have fully transitioned, you will be able to celebrate all the mix of qualities you have. Those are what make you Finn & Infinncible!!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks so much my friend :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hey mate thank you! No its not really been sore, just strange feeling and very very very dry! I wake up at night sometimes and its like a dessert!!! Also sometimes when I go to speak I kinda choke on my words and have a mental coughing 5 mins...its all such good fun!! :D

[@quinnwithin5876]

Wow Finn...i can hear such a difference in your voice! I worry about starting T and appearing like an effeminate man. I am very masculina as a woman but when i get read as male once i start t, i hope i am equally as masculine...being socialized in the incorrect gender sucks!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Exactamondo!!!! Men used to wear skirts...and pink was origionally a male colour! And if you live in france female body hair is a turn on! Its all perspective and norms...theres no "right" way to be for your gender....lets mix it up like crazy!!! Let me know what you find, cheers fella!!

[@rar3kainrandomness]

I agree with you 100% about bottom surgery. If it was an in and out procedure like "oh, I'm going to get my wisdom teeth out" and no big deal at all, I would do it in a heartbeat However It isn't, and I've seen pictures of the results, and that is not what i want. I don't find it bad or ugly or anything....its just not right for me. I'm in my early 30's and I have seen a lot of advancement in science in my lifetime, so I feel like hey, wait 10 yrs, who knows what will be available then.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Lol glad you get that!! Thought it seemed a bit random but its genuinely how Ive started seeing my lower half!!!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hi Jay. I saw your vid, you did a great job! Was one of the things that inspired me to get my thoughts down on vid too. I need to get to a support group, would do me good to do some trans socialising. I feel comfortable identifying as transgender too, I like it! thanks so much my friend :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hey mate! The voice change has been so fast! Sometimes I say something and Im like...woah who said that haha!!! Behaviour can be changed easily enough, it just takes time. I tried that, but I like my little quirks and if they make me be read as effeminate/gay I really dont care. We are now free to be whomever we want to be my friend!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks mate!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks Ethan, they really are such confusing terms! But yes...i too consider myself to be both...lol!

[@CGladly8]

Well said, Finn!!

[@RaefonB]

Does the croaky stage of T voice changes make your throat sore? Good video.

[@MisterJaycobsJourney]

Holy shit Finn! Your voice...

[@Mrlittlewolfuk]

I think people have differing hormonal levels. I have met many trans people who have had high androgens all thier lives and had partial male characteristics, and also those who didnt. Its complex. I relate to the camp stuff, and will say that a lot of transmen go through a camp stage so to speak, much to their friends hilarity, but it seems to weaken over time. T does change the brain further, for instance face recognition goes out the window, sentences shorten etc..and interesting ride :)

[@EthanJay1261]

Nice Video Finn, once again you've talked about some heavy subjects. I thought transgender is identity and transsexualism is when a transgender person has had surgeries. I consider myself transsexual and a transman?...... hmmmmm maybe I just said what you said, lol. funny mate