Full Episode: Part 2 - "Family of Lies" (Ep. 416) | Iyanla: Fix My Life | Oprah Winfrey Network

[@tobehonest4833]

She hit the nail on the head when she pointed out their mental age was 7. That’s profound.

[@TheJackierose1]

That;'s how the Holy Spirit works. Praise God.

[@c_kaoi7660]

I honestly believe that a traumatizing experience like sexual or drug abuse at a young and impressionable age, can stunt the growth of one's mentality.

[@sufundasamuels2313]

Yes, that is really deep.

[@shanya49]

💯💯

[@motherofthreeb6337]

Yes, you can see it by how they reacted to who got what bed. On the outside, it looks like a bunch of grown women being petty. That was their mental age coming out. 😢

[@shelocsher2396]

She failed her daughters just like her parents/guardians failed her 😣. I wish them all healing, and peace.

[@patsym3679]

exactly, no one seems to see that she too was a victim with no one supporting her through it. And where are the men?

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

Yes,❤💐😢

[@gracemunich1476]

@@patsym3679 exactly! where are perpetrators of all this sadness! Men molesting children are sick and need to BEG for forgiveness and accept punishment for their horrible acts, They surely knew right from wrong! NOT ACCEPTABLE at all!

[@Ahmedali-xp6je]

Wouldn’t say she failed……where is the father at?

[@Ahmedali-xp6je]

@@patsym3679 yeah that is what I asked we is the fathers of both the mom Alicia and where is the children’s father

[@gokaren420]

Iyanla is the cold blooded truth....

[@SnowFoxParty]

Her life taught her that...I feel that

[@arnethaearl8468]

That's right! I love how she says " call a thing a thing"

[@khangelwakhathi508]

Yes she is!!!!

[@dstn2bgrt]

Yes and those that came on the show to play despise her for it.

[@glocktaviousbrown5420]

She is an amazing woman I use to read her books in prison and they truly helped me to get through

[@MrAveryBrown93]

“You can cry, but, you’ve gotta cry with an agenda”. A word, for the times. 🤎🤎🤎🤎

[@miesha.b8740]

Yesss this was deep fr

[@sisiscastle3573]

That is a word!!!!!!!!!!!

[@shimmergangfitness5880]

‼️

[@jasmineportis8206]

What do this mean? Can somebody please explain it?

[@biancaknockka]

@@jasmineportis8206 cry with a purpose ( let it out , a sense of relief and feel free ) do not cry just for SHOW

[@ebonyahm6522]

Why?why?why? Did you give that innocent baby girl to that horrible family? My heart is hurting for her.

[@Sunrey2356]

Girl I am over here bawling!!! God please heal these women. Please Lord. Heal us all in your name I pray. Amen

[@tramekn]

Amen!

[@samapples6722]

@@Sunrey2356 Amen

[@claraharrison1509]

@@Sunrey2356 I'm balling too. My goodness!

[@yuhz1m1]

Amen

[@2wonderful2u]

Don’t be shocked if you scratch a little and find this kind of stuff in your own family... best believe this is more common than you think!

[@brandylashay6012]

I think this was more common back in the day. No one in my family would ever try it not.

[@2wonderful2u]

@@brandylashay6012 ok...if you want to believe that, go right ahead...

[@tai4short]

❗❗❗❗

[@tai4short]

@@brandylashay6012 Don't be Naive sis.. That's like you saying no-one in your family ever Lied or Stole.. The devil STILL runs rampant.. Violators most time then often HAVE BEEN VIOLATED. You may never know their stories.

[@brandylashay6012]

@@tai4short that was a little naive of me to say but I don’t think that’s like saying no one in my family ever lied and stole those are two completely different levels but every family is different. I am well aware that my family has a long long history of things like this I just don’t think it’s as common and so easy to get away with like it was back in the day. I’m well aware that the devil can come to steal kill and destroy if you allow him too. If we educate our people about the things to look for the signs and how to deal with situations like this I think our community would be able to deal with this better so that it won’t continue to be a cycle. I 100% agree with your statement because 9 times out of ten the predator was preyed on. Thank you for your opinion ❤️

[@Babywyde]

Wow, Shay sounds like the 7 year old that Iyanla said she was. Heartbreaking.

[@blayze-blaiseford1004]

I felt that too when i saw her break-my heart shuddered🙌🏾😞. As a mother I know that there are pieces of our children that are still emotionally immature especially when theres trauma.💔

[@evelyndaniels251]

Wishing I could send this to my mother but she’s so mean and vile I rather stay away. Cuz this is me and her on every level.

[@evelyndaniels251]

I’m the oldest of 7 and it’s a lot wen there’s incest you have no control of when your a child. Iyania is the truth

[@mingleechi396]

She’s crying like she had a physical relationship with that person which probably hurt her more it seems to me and her mother should have told her

[@tyratucker1218]

@@evelyndaniels251 I am so sorry for any trauma and pain u have endured as a child and thereafter. God only knows the weight u carry on your shoulders on a daily basis. 💔💔💔

[@QueenSugar72]

You sent your daughter to live with the man that violated you?!?! 😡

[@gracemunich1476]

Very bad decision! Very irresponsible! How cruel.......

[@sisiscastle3573]

The nature of secrets is doing things to keep the secret kept. Absolutely tragic😔her mother is such a broken person and Shay is her pain personified 🥺

[@citygirlingraham]

There is no way in hell I would send my child to be around a abuser. PERIOD.

[@emmajackson281]

This was the most horrible decision i've ever seen a person make.

[@lizzylivin27]

Iyanla literally asked if she even wanted to be a mother and she said no she abandoned them and didn’t care for them when she was on drugs

[@Sclilcougar]

The eldest sister is gorgeous!

[@summerbaby88]

She's absolutely stunning

[@prettyface8193]

definitely

[@blacknessjackson7586]

Yes she is

[@sohailumar1339]

And very respectful. Always responding 'yes ma'am'

[@jessicathompson111]

She is and she’s a chocolate version of her mother.

[@MrAveryBrown93]

Listen, when the reality of what happened hit the oldest daughter, that cry was so layered. It was literally like, the 7 year old child in her, was crying out. Even in 2021, I hope they’re continuing the internal soul work. 🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎

[@lb1798]

22:59. That.cry 😢

[@LovinCosmetics]

Yesssss!! Seeing that was so powerful. It was literally like a little girl crying out.

[@kaydidit5644]

That cry broke my heart. Every word you said is true🧡🧡

[@snowball-universe]

@@lb179820:03 was enough for me. That hit her forreal when she looked at Iyanla and her mom.

[@Apricityville]

Ms. Shay, even through all the hurt and what she's going through, she's still so respectful toward Iyanla.. that really stood out to me, for some reason. She literally almost made me break down crying with her.

[@anhonorableindependent9124]

I recognized that as well. She never disrespected Ms Iyanla once. I think that speaks mountains for who she truly is.

[@PJ-hs5gl]

Very big and I loved that. She is as sweet as she can be just so broken

[@Author_DeQuindra_Renea]

Same!!! She always said yes and no ma’am when addressing her

[@PJ-hs5gl]

@@Author_DeQuindra_Renea Yessss

[@1mrsadkinson]

They all were very respectful, so at least they learned that from somewhere.

[@nicoleriley8171]

The violation of children is out of control! I am deeply saddened :(

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

❤💐😢

[@sigerg82nwtbs71]

For real

[@stop08it]

It’s soul shattering

[@kayhumph9109]

Damn iyanla really out here doing gods work helping families

[@gracemunich1476]

she is doing a wonderful job helping these people because she is compassionate and can truly empathize with these families. She has a wonderful heart.. Nothing to do with god, Iyanla doing what we sisters and brothers can DO here on earth if we put our minds and strength and help one another... Please Give Iyanla for being such an intelligent and truly helpful and wonderful women,. Let’s all learn from Iyanla.....

[@jessicathompson111]

@@gracemunich1476 seriously... because if it was god none of this would happen.

[@gracemunich1476]

@@jessicathompson111 true

[@marymartha5252]

She isnt doing God's work,.. she is His vessel..showing His love to us

[@Itsshe1984]

@@jessicathompson111she’s actually an Oshun priestess! 🤣🤣🤣

[@QueenZsWorld]

we need a way to hold these abusers accountable. who knows how many others that one alone has harmed.

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

I agree

[@smilergal89]

This is an important part of the conversation

[@marbou7335]

5 k

[@MsTee-eh1qn]

I hope after this he went to jail

[@manchesterunitedakamrtread8317]

In some countries they never do it again

[@sostrong123]

When Precious screamed out that stabbed my heart. I could no longer keep the tears in. 💔

[@yuhz1m1]

Same here 💔

[@samanthasegarra2683]

Me too... How do u give ur child to the person that molested u... What mother does that? So sad... Notice every time the mom got called out u got mad and walked off

[@katrinawiley7332]

Omg this broke me

[@missmalaisysia6712]

I wanted to just hold her ...I kept crying just looking at children in a grown woman body

[@trudiamond30]

Hunni that was so painful. She had that pinned up for awhile.

[@Brwnskinn518]

That's not anger, baby that's RAGE. She knows spirits baby. I love her for her ministry

[@winnieelaine8592]

We as black women more often than not carry and suffer the unhealed trauma of our mothers💔

[@irisesq.6389]

PREACH

[@yuhz1m1]

Trust me.

[@Sweet_Southern_Pecan]

Lawd yes 😢

[@gracemunich1476]

not just black women but brown ones too

[@jessicathompson111]

@@gracemunich1476 ok but she is a black woman and this is about black women. We also need to worry about ourselves as BLACK woman exclusively.

[@adrianops7]

Its so incredbly powerful what happens when we establish that our parent was once a son/daughter, and they might have not been given the love they would eventually have to give to us. One cannot give what they never received. Having that realization is the birthplace of forgiveness.

[@VickieVale367]

I would forgive her for my own well being and keep her at a distance. This woman breeds toxicity.

[@Miss_Dani_DWhit]

Amen

[@blakely1976]

Amen! These words or so powerful! People need to truly understand the jewel you just dropped!

[@tai4short]

❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗☝🏾THIS

[@lorrainen1012]

It is.

[@khadijamohammed3561]

When I tell you I love this woman and what she does, I would love to sit and chat with this beautiful GOD-Fearing woman.

[@vijo461]

Wow now I’m wondering if there is a part 4

[@rosemaryssmith72]

Hmmm@ Khadija, I agree...she is just amazing and so authentic.

[@aleayahart7985]

Yea, I want to joint her program

[@MsMoneyonMyMind]

Iyanla accurately assessed the kids has not progressed past 7 but the mother hasn’t progressed past the 3rd grade... She cleverly buried that pain so deep that even she did not want to dig it back up for fear of what she may find.

[@Mrscarricom]

Sadly the mother of seven is so broken and she's raising children when she needs someone to raise her 😞, how you allow your daughter to go where you were broken mom?????

[@stpstp7963]

That part...! That is the same as abusing them herself

[@Mrscarricom]

@@stpstp7963 Or no love for the child

[@charleneelliott8978]

Exactly I just can't get my head around that part

[@LONDONESQUE.]

I was stuck for a minute repeating that same question. I can’t understand it a single bit.

[@Mrscarricom]

@@arianaedwards6793 some of us, my role model was other people's mistakes, I don't hate my mother but I realized although she wasn't on drugs she wasn't mentally able to raise children.

[@reneeschancenewme4720]

The Mom and the oldest daughter have along road ahead of them....they don’t like each other at all. 😞

[@gracemunich1476]

true and I van understand why...Lots of therapy needed

[@zoraxye4325]

They might just need to acknowledge each other's pain and rage, then cut each other off. They will never be able to be what the other needs in a mother daughter relationship. And this is OK.

[@BRIDGETUHMYEAH]

Iyanla is really out here healing not only the guests on the show, but everyone watching at home. She drops so many gems and brings up emotions in people who are watching, even if they don’t entirely resonate with the exact experience of the guest.

[@SheistheeTruth]

Facts…I believe I watched these years ago. N here I am still watching, still crying for these women. When I first watched I cried for myself n started my healing process. Now Im soo much better n healthier I cry for all the other women who go thru this stuff. It’s a very peaceful life to truly heal and let go of all the hurt that’s deep within! God is real! 💯

[@Pjsixty60]

That's so true! I've learned so much from her amazing, powerful nurturing skills. Her wisdom and knowledge has really blessed me. Thank you God for Queen Iyanla. 🙏🏼💜🙏🏼

[@angelaroberts2882]

Shay turned into a little baby girl discovering what happened with her mom. I just wanted to hug her and wipe away all her tears 😔. You never know what someone deals with. The tough outer shell has a reason for being that way!

[@Ruby0465]

My mom never believed me when I said her friends son “violated me” she said “ well what do you want me to do about it”? ....I was 16, I’m 38 now and still cry everyday. This is just one issue among the hurt I’ve been through with my mother. Childhood trauma is the worst thing that ever happened to me.

[@gabbyyy6526]

🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿

[@ashleyskitchen6711]

Im sorry that happened to u❤

[@RealElongatedMuskrat]

I'm so so sorry that this happened to you, and that you weren't comforted and protected. You deserved better and still do. I hope you know that it wasn't your fault, and the fact that you've had the strength to keep going despite your mother betraying your trust and letting you down so badly is huge. Sending big hugs to you, friend.

[@RD-ms9gn]

I'm sorry this happened to you and that your mother didn't care. I hope you get positive and healing people in your life.

[@brendakim4152]

🫂🫂🫂🫂

[@miniolagustin5657]

I really miss this woman so BAD!!!!! Like please bring back Iyanla

[@godsgirl1977]

Cry with intention......that part structure me.....tears have to have a purpose and cause.....because when they dry up.....then what??? Great statement Mrs. Iyanla

[@tyratucker1218]

Powerful statement! 🙌🏿

[@jasmineportis8206]

Can somebody really explain this in depth cause I just don’t get it...

[@VenusLoveJones]

She's referring to a poem she wrote years ago called "Yesterday, I cried."

[@VenusLoveJones]

​@Jasmine she's referring to a popular poem she wrote that I love. Yesterday, I cried, for all the days that I was too busy, or too tired, or too mad to cry. I cried for all the days, and all the ways, and all the times I had dishonored, disrespected, and disconnected my Self from myself, only to have it reflected back to me in the ways others did to me the same things I had already done to myself. I cried for all the things I had given, only to have them stolen; for all the things I had asked for that had yet to show up; for all the things I had accomplished, only to give them away, to people in circumstances, which left me feeling empty, and battered and plain old used. I cried because there really does come a time when the only thing left for you to do is cry. Yesterday, I cried. I cried because little boys get left by their daddies; and little girls get forgotten by their mommies; and daddies don’t know what to do, so they leave; and mommies get left, so they get mad. I cried because I had a little boy, and because I was a little girl, and because I was a mommy who didn’t know what to do, and because I wanted my daddy to be there so badly until I ached. Yesterday, I cried. I cried because I hurt. I cried because I was hurt. I cried because hurt has no place to go except deeper into the pain that caused it in the first place, and when it gets there, the hurt wakes you up. I cried because it was too late. I cried because it was time. I cried because my soul knew that I didn’t know that my soul knew everything that I needed to know. I cried a soulful cry yesterday, and it felt so good. It felt so very, very bad. In the midst of my crying, I felt my freedom coming, Because… Yesterday, I cried with an agenda. …Iyanla Vanzant

[@nottiworld_mh]

Sounds familiar but thing is I refused to take kick it at any event, I refused for that individual to touch myself or children, i refused to sit and watch what those didnt see the list can run on

[@godsgirl1977]

So many of us walking around and have no clue as to what kind of womb we sat in for 9 months.....I think the conversation should start there.....many queations about your pain would be answered right there.....

[@GiGiLovingMe_24]

Fact

[@simplygugu]

The Conversations we need to start having with our mothers...

[@JasmineScott930]

This is such a good point!

[@RD-ms9gn]

I know my mom was abusing alcohol. I'm glad I dont have any side effects from that.

[@Pjsixty60]

What kind of womb did we (grow) in? not sat in. I'm just saying

[@sabymindbiz]

This mother's lack of love; abandonment, despair, fears, frustrations, helplessness projected onto her daughters has perpetuated a dangerous generational curse. Can't wait to see Part 3. Thank you, Iyanla!

[@accordingtovee1393]

Right and the saddest part is it was passed onto the mother and her mother’s mother.

[@Mullato2012]

I guess I'm just gonna cry for 40 min...gosh I love this show

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

❤💐😢

[@tyratucker1218]

Right! My eyes are swollen with tears after this💔💔

[@laurethacaldwell8649]

Honey okay? The whole 40!

[@eshagcom3742]

I cried 3 times because this is so much...

[@trudycarter8053]

This is a mess and mom is not taking responsibility for her actions. I know she’s hurt but we have to do better for our children not keep them in that same pot. Lord cover this family.

[@anisahmuhammad228]

She can't do better until she learns how to do better. She is struggling with her past and reality. The mother ran to save her life and didn't even know it. She was first molested when she was under the age of 7. She is stuck at the age of 7 and just SURVIVING right now. The mom is a coward... That is true. She needs to be open.

[@rhonda1704]

Maybe she can't take it. Stop judging

[@Bimchelle]

this woman is so broken, she doesn't even know how to the take the steps towards her own healing, let alone shun responsibility. She is the one who was molested and bored the children....she's done a lot better than many would've...some would've committed suicide

[@gracemunich1476]

The Lord will not cover this family but lots of therapy is required. Very sad situation and I wish them all the best. The perpetrators need to get their butts kicjed BIG TIME! Waiting for the lord never helps, Shay is hyper ventilating and Iyanla helped her, not the lord. PEOPLE need to help others! Reach out and show your love and compassion.....

[@loveyb9090]

Amen. She could have been on birth control or used protection bc these babies deserve a better life.

[@Nurse_Things]

I don’t think I’ve cried so much watching any show but this brought out something in me. I feel so sad for all 7 of them.

[@dbeloved02]

Right I'm full on crying my heart hurts for them

[@Exxtol1]

It's so sad how molestation of a child can destroy families for generations. Whoever molested them is an evil POS.

[@reka-mp2lk]

What kills me is whoever this man is he gettin away wit it every time!!!

[@ClayMastah344]

Where is retribution for these predators because I never see it in these stories, the silence and secrecy is their best friend

[@hadjacisse6645]

@@Msanonymouslady I think it’s the moms uncle... but I’m not sure

[@sunshinesunflowerz1647]

@@Msanonymouslady nobody protected or believed her when it happened to her; you can't give what you dpnt have.

[@sufundasamuels2313]

Yes, and these women are reliving the trauma over and over again!

[@sg5720]

Mom is in denial- that is why she had no problem giving her daughter away like that. Mom was so broken like she was living in a different reality -pretending that everything is fine. It happens a lot. Mom has to heal for herself first before she can even help her daughters- it is so sad what these ladies going through- and all because “MAN” could not control himself. This is the destruction that men can put on women’s lives when they are not doing what their purpose is on this planet to do. 🙁💔

[@donnawoodford6641]

Maybe man's purpose may be to procreate. Maybe woman's purpose is to create. But purpose must be carried out divinely with love.

[@1_viewer]

The man is obviously broken too, and his family just pretended nothing was happening. So sad all around.

[@AuthorLHollingsworth]

Facts!!!!😭😭😭

[@gracemunich1476]

what is a man’s purpose? definitely not to rape! stop making excuses for these men.

[@drobles394]

@@gracemunich1476 Exactly!!!!

[@vhall1989]

The mom is so broken and is disconnected. This is so sad

[@LabiBradleyC]

I was just telling my wife the same thing. She has completely cut off her emotions. She can't even show her children love. It's so sad but I knew incest and abuse had to be the root.

[@leilahjamison1234]

@@LabiBradleyC a lot of Caribbean parents sadly 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@actualwakandangirl7121]

When Shay’s mother broke the news she was still a guarded 35 year old. Then Iyanla spoke to the 7 year old and I was amazed at how she just went back there! That broke my heart.

[@vernaharris4700]

I'm glad the mom had the courage to show up to the show so that her daughters can start the healing process.

[@GreenGeeky]

Shay needs to have a conversation with her daughter and keep that "best friend" away.

[@dcundeniable7804]

Shay seems to have a whole other story going on that may never be revealed

[@eveowusu4045]

💯

[@VickieVale367]

@@dcundeniable7804 I agree. That friend probably continued the cycle via multiple girls. Hopefully not including her and her child.

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

Yep, could also be Shay's dad😯😳🤔

[@maggiemonroe6116]

@@kayshawnsimmons6822 I wonder who that friend is too because the mom and the daughter age gap is only 15 years apart sooo like what kind is friend is this

[@kam1776]

i wanna be sympathetic with the mother but i can’t i’m sorry. i admire her kids for trying to give her another chance because i couldn’t. you gave your child to someone who violated you? chile....

[@nicolesright4800]

I feel the same way....

[@sbaylor7]

She's damaged!!! She doesn't know what's best for her so she wouldn't know what's best for her daughters.

[@kam1776]

@@sbaylor7 i understand that but it’s basic human decency to not get give your child to a molester....

[@belle3055]

@@kam1776 she was 15 or 16 years old... She didn't care, she was a child herself

[@cassandralewis1104]

She sacrificed her daughter so she would be left alone. She knew exactly what she was doing.

[@QueenSugar72]

Shay is crying her eyes out and her mom is sitting there with her arms crossed like she's being inconvenienced

[@khangelwakhathi508]

She shut her heart out, i dont even think she knows how to cry anymore. She lives in her numbness!!! She is so broken she has nothing left!😭😭😭

[@TheMwendaa]

@@khangelwakhathi508 Exaaaaactly She's broken

[@gracemunich1476]

@@khangelwakhathi508 not even compassion ? how very sad...

[@AtheneHolder]

YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND that woman has haad so much years of hurt buried she don't know how to cry really can't blame her

[@jerryberry8967]

@@AtheneHolder exactly my thoughts. Everyone puts blame on the mother but she didn’t know any better and was a child herself

[@cecelouise8033]

This is such a horrific cycle of abuse. My heart hurts for them all 💔 I hope they find the strength to move through this and create a new family history.

[@gracemunich1476]

fully agree. they need continual therapy and support. lots of depression here. very sad and i wish them well.

[@sanchajules2386]

I believe the family member is also precious father.. that's why she also gave her up..

[@nursesrock4264]

😮

[@trudycarter8053]

That was my first thought. I’m not understanding why you would want any child around a person like that knowing who they are.

[@Miss_Dani_DWhit]

Have mercy if that turned out to be a fact. Watching this is just heart wrenching. 💔

[@staceyranee5756]

First thought! Just sad. ❤️

[@esmabarnes1068]

I thought the exact same thing!!! And that's why she said she did not want to be a mother with Precious...

[@MrFancyjohnson1]

When Shay cried I felt so sad ...😭

[@larich4963]

There are so many mothers who walk around with this baggage and no resolution to the pain

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

❤💐😢

[@hopelsumner]

I think they're only using the word "friend" to hide who the "he" really is. I think it was probably an uncle or even grandfather. And, I think that he only became close to Shay to antagonize the mom.

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

I agree, and he could possibly be Shay's dad 😯😳🤔

[@cjandlayyy6837]

I think it was the uncle just by reading the lips

[@The-Mediator]

If she is giving up her daughters to this man, that could possibly be the father to her daughters.

[@mirror0images]

@@kayshawnsimmons6822 apparently he is Shay and Precious's father and he is an uncle (through marriage)

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

@@mirror0images it's real sad that they are protecting this man when he hurt them in the worst way and needs prison time

[@Janettoi]

Wow, Shay has embodied all her mother's childhood trauma along with her own. That's a lot to carry for one person. My heart goes out to her I hope she's in a better space. 💜

[@nancykabia8740]

I have never cried this much in a long time. This is too much! My heart goes out to this family, and I hope they get the healing they deserved.

[@staceyranee5756]

❤️

[@julias2855]

Yes. I know this was taped in 2017. But I’m here praying for healing for these ladies. So much pain & hurt 💕💕

[@tc8790]

How is the mother 50!? She looks like she’s 30. She’s so beautiful. Praying for her and her beautiful children.

[@farapipsqueek636]

Seriously. She is exquisite. I thought she would have babies, not grown children. I cant imagine the pain she grew up eith

[@ivyserenacarter3479]

They were all so respectful of Iyanla.

[@eb9490]

Praying and sending love to everyone who has experienced being molested, it gets easier and you are worthy and loved!

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

❤💐

[@jdm2117]

Amen‼️🙏🏾🫂💗

[@ayyboii8108]

It really does get easier. It wasn't your fault. You are on this earth for a beautiful reason. I hope you find healing ❤️❤️❤️

[@fucksociety8337]

It doesn't get easier.

[@ohoudal-mughathwi7446]

She said "forgive me" in a way that makes u feel that she didn't mean it! her feelings are numb!

[@samanthasegarra2683]

Shay is breaking down cause if her bestfriend did that to her mother, what makes u think he didnt do it to her daughter..

[@dcundeniable7804]

I was thinking the same exact thing..literally still stuck on when Shay said: “interesting” when her mother revealed her molester...what did that response imply exactly?

[@shamigreen]

EXACTLY

[@latashasmith3435]

I strongly agree

[@anisahmuhammad228]

I would not be surprised if he did it to Shay. And who in the hell is "HE?"

[@theadvocate2782]

I'm sure the abuser told Shay he was her "best friend" as a way to groom her. What kind of grown man or woman calls a little girl his/her "best friend" but a child molester?

[@Wezzie0]

The wounds and traumas are so deep, and Iyanla is not even addressing where the men or father's of these girls are in the equation. People just having babies with no intentions for them.

[@Adornbeautify]

The women didn't mention it.

[@QueenSugar72]

None of the ladies addressed their father (s) so she didn't bring it up. I think the root of their problems stem more so from mommy thirst than daddy hunger. Not that a girl doesn't want their dad around but a girl definitely needs a mother's touch, a mother's love

[@joannasaadati8810]

You can't expect a broken woman to even know how to pick a man who will stay to love and protect her and the kids.

[@The-Mediator]

@@QueenSugar72 Fathers are the protectors. When girls don’t have their fathers (and mothers) to shield them from male predators, it definitely causes father issues.

[@sherieka1100]

In the beginning of the episode on part 1 Keisha stated her father was deceased

[@blackken9960]

When I look at each one of her children they look like and act like the different stages of life the mother was in when she had them. All the mother had to do was apologize for the pain she caused them. She was just learning trying to find her way. She was lost and made mistakes that she wish she could take back but she can't. Sometimes an apology and acknowledgement of hurt goes a long way.

[@uniquebryan6870]

Bruh I need dis lady to work her magic on my family bruh

[@kayshawnsimmons6822]

Ikr,😯🥺❤💐🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[@cjandlayyy6837]

Mine too

[@tyratucker1218]

Wonder if she will come even though it’s a pandemic now?🤷🏽‍♀️. Cause everyone is bat crazier even more now.

[@cjandlayyy6837]

@@tyratucker1218 no doubt it

[@GiGiLovingMe_24]

My fiance family definitely need some of this grace.

[@stpstp7963]

Shay prob even had her child around this person...

[@salome9124]

Shay has been touched by the same man, but he told her they were friends. Shay thought she was the only one. The special one. That girl reverted back to childlike. This is my hypothesis. Very sad indeed.

[@Iyanjebu]

I was thinking the exact same thing

[@blackbeautyk6074]

I feel so too

[@lataeweatherspoon7115]

Facts I fell same way

[@pierrettepfingu1961]

I was thinking the same thing. I feel like shay didn’t want that info to be shared in tv so they cut it out. Cauz I feel if she’s close with that person and her mother who she doesn’t really trust give her such revelation about that person she’s close with a “normal’ reaction will be not to believe that info, I think she believed that right away because she went through the same thing, and realized how evil that person she trusted is, that’s why she so hurt and crying so much. That’s just my theory but could certainly be wrong

[@bmooremoore4460]

Right. The mother was violated by two people yet allowed her children to be around them so I understand why all (especially the two daughters) are angry at her

[@NycoleIdris]

These elders sometimes REFUSE to tell their story !!!

[@Thaartofbeauty]

They are so dam set in their ways

[@colorpurple86]

When Shay broke, it broke my heart💔😢 I wanted to hug her.

[@sufundasamuels2313]

Omg! I'm like, this poor baby! I cried with and for her in an instant!

[@carolpfavayi3882]

“I need you to be 34 not 7”... “I’m 35 😭😭” 😂

[@Pjsixty60]

Iyanla told her that she needed her to be 30, she corrected her by saying she was 35. 😀

[@keziyahyisrael9672]

One thing I've learned is that your kids are a reflective image of you❤️

[@shelbimdennis]

The problem is that the mother is still 15 mentally and she didn’t have the capacity to take care of her children

[@shakirabasemore5681]

The power of a healer 🌱💖 Iyanla looked Shay in her eyes & shay broke instantly. Like a light switch. It was the most beautiful release 🤞🙌🙏

[@Dream-xe8ej]

My heart goes out to each and every woman there. This is some heavy stuff and to talk about it on TV. My heart breaks 💔

[@nottiworld_mh]

So true and so many can be put into jail but my story the family waited so long the doer is deceased now but the seed of the deceased one lives help us father

[@jenniferray509]

​@nottiworld_mh wait which one died??

[@Jo-in3ms]

I love how Iyanla handles people’s pain with love and comfort. Tough love isn’t always the answer. Sometimes this is exactly what people need no matter how tough their exterior.

[@amarablacc]

Marcia is so soft spoken I love her

[@aaliyahsmiles7345]

I just...the way both Shay and her mama was jumping down her throat to the simplest and not overly shady stuff she would say was irking!

[@humanseeksjustice8830]

I was molested several times, the perps got away and family even protected some of them. That lil child is trying to keep my own children safe in this cold world. Hang in their survivors, find a way!

[@territ1231]

This poor family.... Six girls trying to get through life.

[@bloop6461]

And not a man in sight 😓 bm need to do better and so do we

[@KapQueen]

Mom does not want to let that wall down. She wants to pretend to be better because its easier then working through

[@citygirlingraham]

I have told my teenage sons about all my trauma, molestation, date rape, familial verbal abuse. They know it all. I thought to myself , it wasn’t my fault snd I’m not ashamed. I was a victim. It helped me be a UNDERSTOOD mother, which I need them to realize what I’ve been through.

[@onika284]

“In order to relate to someone or to be in relationship with someone, they are two important elements; you gotta tell the truth and you gotta trust”

[@lilliejune4203]

Thank you to this courageous beautiful family for taking these steps. My mother passed me on to men starting with my father at age 3. I wanted to know why. This story is what I prayed for😭 I feel that my Mother wants me to know this is her story. Today is her birthday, and I scrolled past this video. She passed over 3 years ago. I did feel really triggered by Alicia, but im grateful for that, I have more healing work to do.Thank You, I love you all💜🙏🏾💜

[@dcundeniable7804]

the transparency is amazing...this story more common than not...truth is only beginning the journey...takes great courage to speak truth

[@lilliejune4203]

@@dcundeniable7804 🙏🏾

[@Dream-xe8ej]

🙏🏽🙏🏽 you sound like a brave person. Keep your head up.

[@MsEmarie2010]

@Lily Belle 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾💪🏾

[@josiegeah5031]

May God be with u always 🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@lilbru]

This woman should be paid millions upon millions for the ability to use her pain/regret as a tool to help others...that in itself is an amazing skill/attribute...

[@zikhonankabi1974]

None of your kids have progressed beyond 7. Damn.

[@aliciacarter3241]

And that statement is so powerful and true

[@irisesq.6389]

Yeah, that was deep.

[@sisiscastle3573]

The mother hasn’t progressed passed 13...the level of arrested development in this family is absolutely tragic

[@ullandajernigan6313]

Facts

[@lilliejune4203]

Oh my, my goodness,this woman is telling my mothers story. This is very similar to our story as well. Im watching this on my mothers birthday, wow. Thank You Iyanla🙏🏾

[@j4m32hz6]

Happy birthday mom🎉

[@belindahwairimu7055]

Thank u Lily i hope u got your healing and y'all doing fine.

[@julianrichy5830]

20:04 I'm a grown man and i almost broke down. Iylana is so Spiritual that she can sense what is going 2 happenb4IT does.

[@brownskinfriendly]

What does you being a grown man have to do with breaking down? Sir break down

[@michelleplaskoff9920]

When Iyanla said you are going to have to sit in it....whoa....that's the only way to heal is sit in it....Iyanla is the ultimate healer ❣️❣️❣️

[@t2zee844]

Wow. This episode got me so emotional. Looking at their mom I can see she has been living in hell, I can't imagine how that feels, it's as if she is also stuck in her 7 year old self because she just doesn't have the capacity to handle this. I really appreciate Iyanla, she has taught me a lot.

[@felizzy3989]

Couldn't watch this without crying

[@ReincarnatedStargazer]

Same. I can't get thru any of her shows without crying. But this one is so intense.

[@gokaren420]

Mother is beautiful....even after drugs....she got teephis....good skin...

[@ayyboii8108]

I know Ms Iyanla is helping me heal cause I'm no longer living through each guests story. Although I can relate, I'm not tearing up anymore because I've began to allow the little girl in me to grow into the woman I am. I am so grateful for this show.

[@kingkings5401]

Well put 🖤

[@marywrenn5262]

The pain of her crying on the bed went straight to my heart. I understand that pain and hearing it is gut wrenching.

[@amyimogenimagine]

Coming from generational trauma as a young woman.. being privileged to have parents who fought to heal themselves, I inevitably was hurt watching their pained inner children try bring us up. Iyanla, I sit here with tears streaming down my face, rubbing my heart centre and feeling all of the appreciative feels for a light worker like you healing families and people ❤️ this is the most important work for all humanity.

[@ashasamuel9436]

This made me cry.

[@Nicole7benny]

Me too 😔

[@AsToldByUfa]

@@Nicole7benny me three :( everything here hurts my heart for the mom and children

[@astoumd]

I would pay money just to have Iyanla touch my hand.

[@zingimazongs274]

Im the same....👋👋 her teachings are on another level

[@gokaren420]

Lol

[@mshardbodi35]

I Need it 🙏🏾

[@donnawoodford6641]

Don't idolize another human, but revere the Lord who made her. You are capable of doing great things, also.

[@donnahoworko5705]

Oh no I want a big hug 😊

[@simbae170]

" Friends with your mothers violater." WOW. Mum couldnt protect herself so she put her daughters in the same devil's arena. POWERFUL EPISODE.

[@tenmusicpage]

Man Iyanla is showing out wow 😯 she breaking generational curses Jus by me watching this!

[@morinomopariola]

How did Iyanla not cry?....I balled my eyes out through the episodes of this family 😭

[@dorismwangi1368]

She's a professional if she did how the client handle it?

[@malikbukaiinyc900]

The oldest said "interesting", then the truth revealed itself responding to her mom's trauma. I'm guilty of giving up at the hard exterior, not reaching that vulnerable core.

[@bridgetshin9091]

I caught that too. She said “interesting” as if that’s not new news. As if if happened to her or her child.

[@butterflyblessbless5836]

I knew one out of the 6 has been molested😪😪😪

[@shaasiagoss6538]

I honestly think shay was molested too but was drawn more because she thought it was love

[@mpho242]

My heart broke when Shay was crying💔I was crying my eyes out..And then turning to the mother and she seems "over it" and detached..and then Iyanla's method of trying to calm her down instead of letting her get it all out...that's years of pain..I wish she would've comforted her more because she's never got that from the mom and had to pick up her mother's slack..I hope Ms Shay is doing better now.

[@kayekaye08]

When Shay said she needed to smoke, I felt that

[@koyamachar8698]

It’s the way iyanla said my love and shay brakes down. She got a different touch.

[@yewandeyo]

So essentially, men are the cause of this hurt and pain that has permeated generations but they aren’t held accountable. When will they be held accountable? Because their damage is irreversible.

[@christiansoldier77]

yewandeyo Men dont have anything to do with this problem . The mother has never been a real mother to any of them and that is her fault not the fault of the guy who raped her.

[@bigche5859]

It bothers me that men can do these things and get away with it... they are seldom held accountable to the damage they create.... maybe because it’s underlying 🧐

[@christiansoldier77]

@@bigche5859 How is it a man's fault that they dont have a good relationship with their mother?

[@akzidenz9999]

@@christiansoldier77 because a male family member raped her?....

[@christiansoldier77]

@@akzidenz9999 So because that happened to her thats an excuse for neglecting her kids???

[@annettetyulu9192]

Let me just say Mama Iyanla is highly gifted. There's no way a human being can do the things that she does without supervision from a higher power. I honor the anointing in her and respect the ancestors that she walks with🙌🙌...Its a pity that here in South Africa we can't access the OWN channel and get to be blessed by her anointing😞😞...and when we try to watch on KZbin and its not full content😭😭 I still love you Mama Iyanla and may God continue to use you ma in healing our fellow black brothers and sisters in America...God bless❤

[@sopekookie7]

I got goosebumps when she knew shay was about to breakdown after just saying “interesting”.

[@lizlemonline2951]

This made me sad. She gave her daughter to them to punish her. She admitted not wanting her and not wanting her children. That was purposeful and hateful. Her mother went from “I didn’t know what she went through” to “She told me what happened”. She knew it was a possibility it’d happened and didn’t care. She knew it was going on and didn’t go get her. I understand she had a hard life and a hatred for the situations she went through. But it didn’t give her the right to do what she did. She sounds cold and distant throughout all of it. Sometimes your only family is your siblings and that’s ok.

[@javesday8814]

Absolutely.

[@shanya49]

Agreed

[@1000mizz]

People want to make sure you go through the same pain they went through. Pain, the gift that keeps on giving; in this world.

[@jynp4499]

Most people asking what's wrong with the mom? Well she is in deep broken pain and acting tough as they teach us in black community to do, get over the pain like that will heal it. We can't sit here and judge and say she cold. How many could survive what she has? Not only to be rape at a young age but be raped again in teenager years and to get babies from that rape and that is a family member or friend and no one to come to your defense and they all turn the blind eye but u have to go through these pregnancy? We have to understand those times were not our times and even in our time now we still learn to be silence and a shame because its something that is passed down. The only question is why did she gave her baby to the family only God will know but sometimes pain could be so profound that people don't even know. She may want to hug her kids but she doesn't cause in her pain no one hug her so she doesn't know. We All process pain different and is only when we are hit with life situations we will see how we handle things. I'm sorry she went through what she did and there may be more underlying things we may never know but I pray she gets the healing she needs so she can pass love to her kids and her grandkids. I pray the children get healing in their lives and can be better sibblings and mothers to their kids and though some pain and scars may seems they will never go that they know God is the refuge of it all and they stay strong. Blessings.

[@basetsanam1876]

😭😭😭

[@BeInspiredwithWunmiElebute]

So true

[@gracemunich1476]

god is notrefuge otherwise they would not seek help from Iyanla. what did god do the last 19 years? Only therapy can help this family and guide them to heal. Waiting for god is useless.... We sisters and brothers need to work at healing and that is work. Praying brings little... Work on your relationships if you really care, This is why this why this show is here with Iyanla.

[@tiea_patrax4005]

@@gracemunich1476 how is waiting on God useless?

[@The-Mediator]

@@gracemunich1476 Faith with work. Pray with work. Love with work. We are of God, but we are also of earth and of our parents. We need both balance of these elements to make it through.

[@sarahbay3607]

The mother left the monster to enjoy her kids. She even cares about the pain she through on them what a shame

[@jazznorelletv]

Unfortunately the monster was their father..