Generational Trauma Talk With My Dad- EP 3// Chit Chat & Change

[@Sarahxxxxxxx]

Sam, I mean this when I say you are so lucky to get an apology from your dad. That is something most of us will never ever get from our parents. Don’t be so hard on the guy

[@catcat9582]

Fr.

[@StussyTai]

this is not right to say. no matter how many apologies he says she still has a right to feel that way… stop projecting.

[@ellapotero5166]

Wow I’ve never in my life ever seen a man with so much self awareness and accountability. Good for him for trying his best for himself and his kids.

[@gabbystadel]

You’re so lucky to have a father who has spent so much time working on himself and being so understanding of the generation trauma he doesn’t want to continue passing down

[@evaliaaastathi]

It hurts so much the fact that I can't even visualise my dad sitting next to me and opening up like that and having a healing convo together like you guys.

[@janhisss]

it’s so hard for the older generation to change and I commend you and your dad for putting in the work and trying to better yourselves! The generational trauma is stopping with you Sam!

[@ok-ew7qt]

“This is very uncomfortable, so I’m gonna sit through it” (28:57) - Sam’s dad This is literally so beautiful

[@julia4372]

I wish my dad was sane enough and had enough awareness to realize his mistakes to have a talk like this I’m so glad that your dad did that for you Sam

[@bbloodyangel1]

I mean this so respectfully and dont mean to take away from the message of the video... but your father is so handsome. wow.

[@roseanndelage1401]

I agree but great chat very informative

[@allisonvictoria3790]

I agree

[@meganbissonnette9507]

I was thinking the same thing

[@danamurrgordon7756]

My first thought. Extremely handsome. And she’s beautiful so I see where she gets it from ❤

[@amandam7534]

This is definitely your calling. Please don’t stop

[@morganlundeen9477]

this is the accountable dad that everyone needs

[@taylorplease]

I just started watching but read a few comments of people saying don’t hold anything against your dad.. i’m not saying yes hold your grudges, but we are all justified in our feelings towards our upbringing- it is okay to be angry, to forgive, then get re-angered at thoughts of how you were neglected, and how you were hurt as a child. You should have felt safe and taken care of. You deserved that. Our parents deserved that too, as children. It is okay to be mad and feel guilty about being so mad still at times 20 years later, it’s normal. I grew up with alcoholics, domestic violence, generational trauma- it’s hard to deal with all the feelings and outcomes of their bad decisions. We are all learning how to cope. Our parents are not perfect- but they loved us how they could, and we are allowed to be angry, sad, afraid, and grateful all at once.

[@Samkelly32]

Exactly! I could not have worded it better. Thank you for this❤️

[@CaileighCasey]

It is so comforting seeing parents apologize and do better for their children. As someone who grew up with a very angry father and an alcoholic mother, I am very traumatized. My mom has apologized but still has a drinking problem and I don’t think she will ever get better if I’m being honest. My dad is still such an angry person and I think it has to do with the way he grew up. He actually didn’t wish me a happy birthday last week and it’s still affecting me. This video healed me a in a way and I also feel more understood. Not everyone’s lives are perfect. But always try to break the cycle!

[@mila86.]

I’m addicted to these episodes please never stop

[@The_artistannie]

This man is such a beautiful example of what recovery has to offer. This man has put in WORK! So obvious he works the 12 steps daily. I am so glad for my addiction, it has made me so much better of a human (10 years clean) Bravo my man!! As parents we do the best we can with what we have. Thank god your children have this Dad to remember and love!

[@ashleyberardi1139]

You’re dad is such a good man he’s trying his best and working everyday to become better the fact that he can tell you guys sorry is what most damaged kids need that will unfortunately never get. Cherish him 🙏🏼💕

[@corporategirlprobs]

your dad was so vulnerable here and he is a great example of father who is showing up for his kid in the most important way- going to therapy, owning his mistakes, and taking true accountability even though its hard. a true gift this is, to your audience. MORE OF THIS

[@madelinehixon]

This was truly amazing to see from a dad of his generation. Please do more talks like this with him. This has been so informative!

[@waler69]

You dad is an amazing guy, plz don’t hold anything against him, we all can relate in some way about how our upbringing from our parents as your upbringing from your dad, if that makes sense.

[@rubybeans8379]

I hope you know how important these conversations are! You’ve truly changed the trajectory of my life so THANK YOU and don’t stop 🫶🏽

[@nicolecavaliere23]

I don’t think you quite understand what’s it’s like to grow up in a family like your father grew up in. You give him no credit for the hard work he’s put in. You’re so blessed to have a parent who made the effort to change and get help and can own his wrongs and say he is sorry. You may be mature but honey you are young and still have a whole lot to learn.

[@kanyisolao6983]

literally, they are so hard on him. she literally said she has nothing to do be sorry for because her therapist told her that like what?? girl wake up

[@juliaetime]

@@kanyisolao6983 Ok but realistically she is not at the mental age and wisdom to acknowledge her father's trauma as a justification for the hurt it has caused her growing up. She is still evolving, finding herself, and healing from the stressful childhood she has had herself. It's completely normal for her to be this brut and angry at her father at this stage.

[@kanyisolao6983]

@@juliaetime ehh we’re the same age, my parents have done their own share of things but I’ve acknowledged the part I’ve had to play in it as I am human & I also humanize my parents - apologies can go both ways.

[@juliaetime]

@@kanyisolao6983 True but age does not equal maturity and wisdom. You guys being the same age does not mean you have had the same experiences. You might be mature enough to forgive your parents, but clearly by the way she expresses herself and at the beginning she says "I don't know anything about his upbringing" this is her first time hearing about his trauma. So give her more time.

[@amandaguzman1766]

Sam, don’t forget it’s his first time being a parent too.. one day you will be a parent and you may face challenges and not know how to handle them properly.. he seems genuinely & deeply remorseful for what he has done.

[@juliaflores5486]

i think this is so important for parents to watch.

[@johannawoods9870]

Sam you are very lucky to have your dad literally sit down with you and hear you out . My dad is in recovery, doesn’t go to a therapist and think nothing was ever his fault , I resent him in so many ways and you are lucky enough to have someone who is willing to do this with you . Smile a little more, give him a hug , and be thankful ❤

[@ayatchafaqui]

This was so amazing to watch. You can tell your father is a great person who wants to do better for his family. I’m so glad you are open and discussing this . This will strengthen your relationship incredibly ❤

[@SissyRogers-sp6zj]

This is the conversation I wish I could have with my father. He was the exact same way your father was. Too us my sisters and my mother. But your father has grown and that is so beautiful too see.

[@andidahl222]

it made me cry when he was apologizing in detail for his exact actions and wrongdoings- sooo sincerely too. i pray for that kind of awareness from my parents as it would allow me to heal more and love more but I know I will never get that in this lifetime. its so cool that you two took the time to do this it healed me a bit just watching this fr

[@FURnDIAMONDS]

Your father being so vulnerable with you and us shows an incredible amount of humility. I hope you both the best on your healing journey ❤

[@nicollerodriguezz]

I started watching this just because I’m cleaning, had to stop because wow! this is insane. I am so glad you have your father, I am realizing so much with this episode. Thank you!

[@sofiamaria194]

I love how insightful these pods are. Props to both you and your dad for being able to sit down and talk about these things❤ loving all these topics so far

[@kaylah8645]

I could cry from how much i’ve realized from this video and how it’s a beautiful thing to understand things more deeply to not carry the rest onto the next person or thing. You guys are a beautiful family and are very blessed to have this opportunity. Love you sam!

[@corporategirlprobs]

SAM- you have quickly become my favorite youtuber. i can't explain how much im learning from you and you sharing your experiences of childhood trauma, therapy, and healing. this conversation with you and your father has been healing for me in the sense of its everything that ive wanted to hear from my own dad, but he refuses to aknowledge generational trauma even exists, much less aknolwedge my experience with him growing up and then apologize. if your dad is open to it, I would love to see more conversations between you two here.

[@kaitlynpassaretti5820]

The self awareness is truly beautiful to witness. Thanks for sharing this

[@cinnamonrollss]

Wow this is such a beautifully vulnerable and transparent video. Thank you both for sharing about your family.

[@jennykelter9518]

I’m a single mom with 4 kids. I basically had to cut off my family last year due to so much patterns of abuse . I’ve been in therapy and doing emdr as well and working on my own garbage and trying to heal for myself and to be a better mom . I just came here to tell you both , thank you for this conversation , you have no idea how much it helps me to hear you two hold each other accountable and so vulnerable and push back with each other and still be able to sit there and have a relationship together. I haven’t had that experience with my family , and seeing this shows me markers for what to looks like. I really appreciate this . Thank you and I commend you both for working so hard.

[@hiccup28]

I really enjoy this type of content. It’s rlly nice to see you and your dad being able to unpack the generational trauma and that he has been willing to heal and do better.

[@taylinmickelsen8286]

sam this is so inspiring and as i was watching this took my breath away. it is so impressive your father and you as-well are able to sit together and have a talk like this you have no idea how much this has opened my eyes. please keep doing this it’s what we need as a generation. ❤️

[@joannap9554]

I LOVE this on SO many levels! First of all, your dad is so so handsome 🥰 and second, I love the way he wants to better himself. That is so admirable and so hard for most people to get to that point in their self awareness journey. This is so beautiful to witness. Thank you SO much for sharing! I’m hoping to see more of these. You two have a lot of unresolved issues that will definitely be overcome one day only because you are BOTH willing to do the work. God bless you both and sending my love ❤️

[@saras9270]

love this conversation and so refreshing that he’s open to having it with you!!!! proud of both of you ❤

[@HiddenGemHealingLLC]

Wow, I didn’t expect to relate to your dad so much when I clicked on this video! I am a 27-year-old woman who grew up as the oldest child in an abusive household (my dad was also Irish, right off the boat, and a severe alcoholic). I also became the “fixer” in the family and ended up choosing abusive boyfriends and becoming the “fixer” with them in my early 20’s. Now, I’m also doing EMDR and completely transforming my perception of what it means to be healthy and regulated in my own energy but also in my relationships. I was able to graduate college with a bachelors in psychology and also became a Reiki practitioner. In hindsight, I see how the trauma has led me to pursuing a career where I want to help others heal. I’m looking forward to creating my own family in the future with another like-minded partner who is also working on themselves, and birthing a new generation of children who have the complete opposite experience that I had, my father had and probably many generations before that❤️✨

[@Samkelly32]

Wow this is so amazing- I’m so happy that you are putting in so much work for you & ur future family❤️ thank you for sharing! best wishes always❤️❤️❤️

[@bringontherainbows8369]

In reality, no parent is perfect, even if we come from the “ideal” situation. The reality is, we make mistakes, and we have to own those mistakes and make it right. Obviously, we are lucky to have that acknowledgment from our family members if we do get it. It paves the path to growth and healing and deeper connections- ❤

[@Jri2012]

He’s done the work and is doing the work so when his daughters have there baby’s they will be so much better off. He is successful❤ not financially but emotionally which is my definition of success in this life❤ girl you are blessed 😊 you NEED to forgive him and love him❤

[@Thenaturecat]

Very educational! Loved hearing from your dad 🫶🏼

[@Neliboo10]

🫶🏽 thanks Sam, I'm a parent and am battling with addiction- alcoholism, it's nice to see the outcome of someone's parenting, you've developed into such a wise young woman and I'm so inspired by your vulnerability and representation of yourself! Goes to show no matter your upbringing you chose how to thrive.

[@Neliboo10]

23:25 lmao me asf

[@melissasilva6205]

This was so incredible to watch. You should really have more convos with your dad on here, I think it would be very helpful for many people bc it shows what healthy communication looks like. Great on your dad for his own self growth but also for encouraging you and your siblings to go to therapy also! I’ve been going for 3 years now and I just wish I started earlier!

[@middlesaint]

this healed a part of me that i didn’t even know needed healing. sam you are really lucky to have a dad that is willing to put in the work to be a better man and father. most fathers wouldn’t do this. i also learned so much from this video. i had a lot of the same experiences as you sam, and the perspective your dad brought about the situations opened my eyes. for example, my parents would also get extremely angry if i got hurt as a child and i never understood why until now when your dad said its because they are making your injury about themselves. please do another episode with your dad! loved this one.

[@Chjplsnico]

You should have him back on for a financial discussion, really think we would gain a ton of knowledge from him!

[@annanelsen8006]

your dad is amazing

[@achsahsiqueira3960]

Wow I related so much to this down to the parents getting mad ,specifically my dad, at me and my siblings for getting hurt. seeing your dad take accountability actually brought me to tears I didn’t know how much I needed to hear a parental figure take accountability and apologize and not make it feel like you had to apologize when you didn’t even do anything wrong❤️

[@secretladybug]

this is so vulnerable and raw, it really opened my eyes

[@monicad7222]

Thank you so much for this video Sam, and for sharing your family's vulnerability. My family also has a history of generational trauma and this video really healed a part of me and makes me want to become even better. God bless you and your family

[@victorialakes]

I could listen to you talk all day

[@Anahiallvarez]

your videos have been the most comforting videos i have watched probably ever. thank you

[@emmagracecasson]

i love all of this, but especially the end where your dad gets so excited about the big foot encounter and wanting to do another episode with you 🥹🥹 as a girl who wishes she got that apology and bond with her dad, that was so cute to me

[@madelinehixon]

What i would give to have my dad do this kind of work on himself and take accountability for so much trauma in my childhood. He still yells constantly and it still gives me so much PTSD when I get yelled at from him or anyone else to this day & I’m 30 years old. I love my therapist so much but I am definitely still dealing with current trauma that’s ongoing in my family so we don’t deep dive to heal the uncomfortable stuff as much. But I hope the fact that I love her doesn’t mean she’s a bad therapist

[@megatron4338]

I randomly came across this video on my feed and girl you are so lucky to have a dad who cares the way he does about you.

[@tactiicz_3668]

Nobody’s perfect. I’m sure being a parent is very difficult… especially when the other parent doesn’t discipline and give structure. You’re very lucky to have a dad that holds himself accountable and will apologize for his mistakes. A lot of us I’d even say 95% of the world doesn’t have a parent that would do that.

[@jesseberlinjames]

Halfway through this video, I’m shocked by Sam’s attitude toward her father. She neither treats him fairly nor shows the respect a daughter owes a good parent. She also seems convinced she knows more than she actually does. Criticizing her father’s emphasis on proper behavior and correct pronunciation is unjustified-in fact, such guidance helps shape strong character and discipline. Teaching children to consider how others perceive their actions is not about restricting their freedom, but about guiding them toward becoming considerate, respectful individuals. A suggestion for her father: avoid reinforcing the notion that your daughters have understood everything or that their perceptions are always correct. Also some psychologists are simply wrong-do not follow every suggestion or recommendation without critical thought. I just get the feeling of an unhealthy entitlement and ungratefulness.

[@mellll45]

yea I completly understand what sam had gone through with her relationtionship to her dad but it feels like this is almost public humiliation. He keeps apologizing for every little thing he's ever done on the internet and is being outed it almost feels unfair but idk

[@ABBYXO]

This video really resonated with me. I grew up/live in NJ (I’m in my 30s though) and my dad was born in Brooklyn. He acts very similarly to your dad! He would always get angry when I was in pain growing up or if I would get hurt. He would also blow up at people for small things like leaving a cart in the middle of the aisle. I noticed myself mimicking his behaviors subconsciously and I’ve done so much work to change it. I’ve actually asked him why he got mad when I was hurting lol. It’s a strange reaction but I’m happy you’re bringing this up and talking about it. Loved this video ❤️🥺

[@ABBYXO]

Also I think it’s awesome your dad is acknowledging you and apologizes. The older you get, the harder it is to change habits and patterns of thinking. I think the progress is beautiful!

[@slimjadeyyy]

I relate to your dads story. I love that he drives home the importance of getting sober and getting therapy!

[@kayleedrake-n6b]

this was healing. ive never enjoyed watching a youtube video more

[@juliesantos7850]

you have no idea how much I needed this ! I am a single mom and some of the things you guys talked about made me realize I came from a traumatic home. Thank you for this Sam you were made for this keep going please.

[@danamurrgordon7756]

I absolutely love this. I am so amazed at how well knowledgeable ur father is on his self and his life and you and your siblings. He took the time to go get therapy and work on himself and further his knowledge on himself and answer all the “why’s”. So important for us to have a good mental state before having children so I agree with ur father with that statement on having babies. I think we are never ever ready but ! But it’s very important to work on ourselves instead of further bringing down generations of trauma. Very great and interesting episode! Love this ❤

[@suzannebernfeld6116]

This was an amazing video with your Dad. He really is admirable and so transparent. He is full of wisdom yet has flaws but continues to strive to be a better person and father every day. You are so lucky to have a dad like that. Hope to see more of you and Dad

[@isabelreyes1904]

I totally understand her. Her father has taken the time to better himself for her and his family and she knows it’s possible. So why couldn’t vincent do it. My parents healed themselves for me and I know it was possible with the right amount of love and support and I was willing to support my ex of 6 years and that wasn’t enough for him to do the work and that was ok but I did not have to sit by and continue with the relationship

[@TanyaMitchell-kt2zm]

This podcast was so healing.

[@kaciegambino3870]

your dad may have made mistakes in the past, but the only thing that matters right now is that he is trying to better himself. He is self aware of the actions he has made in the past and is willing to make a difference

[@denicepickens]

This video popped up on my explore page and WOW! Generational trauma is a topic that needs to be talked about wayyy more. Keep doing what you're doing girl!

[@ryelleoconnor117]

my dad did most of these things to me too. it takes a lot of awareness and therapy to get to his level of understanding of what he caused. you are so lucky that he can actually sit with you, let alone on a podcast, and say sorry. in a way this was healing because i can listen and know that im not being dramatic about the things i went through and neither were my siblings.

[@miabellagianni]

New watcher here. This was such a great video. Thank you for sharing. Very mind opening as a young parent to a one year old boy !!

[@lexierose3795]

watching this as someone without a father, i am so extremely jealous of yours, in the best way- you are very lucky to have him!

[@hlumie6]

Watched the "We listen and we don't judge" video and y'all just popped up on my recommendations! Of course I had to sub!

[@angievlogiannitis3135]

This was a great video; I commend you both on going to therapy. Seeing how you were both able to speak about the wrongdoings of the other person and taking accountability for such was AMAZING to see!

[@allisonvictoria3790]

Love this. I’m in my 40’s and it’s great to see that there are still men out there that are willing to “elevate”

[@lisam-ov4mw]

I LOVED this episode. I can’t imagine how much it means to hear acknowledgement from your dad about his wrong doings. I love the real and rawness!!

[@karlaabxo]

This was so healing to watch, Being the first one in my Hispanic family to ever go to therapy and acknowledging the dysfunction has been hard but so worth it. Please keep making more chit chats I’m obsessed it’s so motivating to keep going and knowing the amount of progress and knowledge it has gave someone from it!

[@Kinzahasan_]

This healed me a little (a lot).. because I know if my dad healed himself, worked on himself, I knowwww this would be us having a conversation like this. But sadly I’d just have to make do with me knowing the outcome but also knowing realistically he would never ever work on himself like that. I respect him either way, I don’t seek his approval anymore but yeah having a healthy conversation would do us both good I feel like. Oh well

[@isabel116]

Really great video. Thank you for sharing your stories with us. Really amazing.

[@marianevin4784]

This video is amazing. I love that you speak your mind with him.

[@Victoria-b4m1s]

From the UK here, my dad came from the same type of family as your dad. My dad is my best friend but if he starts I’m scared and I’ve also been hit. I don’t hold it against him because I know that’s how he was brought up

[@jasminehazel4995]

THIS WAS SUCH A HEALING AND AMAZING EP, I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN TO DESCRIBE HOW GOOD IT WAS ON SO MANY LEVELS!

[@sofiamendez6953]

i really enjoyed watching this, thank you for being open and both of yall willing to talk about generational trauma and how yall can change!!

[@selinsevinc9585]

Beautiful watch. So vulnerable, thank you both for sharing ❤

[@xoglitterxo26]

Thank you so much Sam this means so much that you posted this , helped me heal from my generational trauma

[@8ezra858]

a father most of us dreamed of. Bless you guys

[@Lauren-m3j9p]

wow this was very healing to watch

[@savannahmcdoanld214]

This is awesome. I’m about to graduate with my Bachelor’s in psychology and going on to get my masters in clinical mental health counseling. This was great to watch. Props to you and your dad.

[@MadiBernard]

this is a beautiful conversation and very special

[@mya.marissa]

I rewatched this over & over , absolutely loved this♥️

[@amiri.knievel]

I think we need an episode talking about your father's career, as someone who is in the early stages of their own and battling some similar battles as your father mentioned i would love to hear his start up through all of the battles. He said he made more than the mayor/ president, I'm fully intrigued and I think others are as well. Great video!

[@itsholliewithanie]

Absolutely love this. Thank you both for sharing!

[@lilyanne6705]

i actually loved this video so much and appreciate the honesty and rawness. every family has their own problems

[@JJ-cl5wv]

I love this. Great to see someone I. That generation be so self aware and speak about these things.

[@berenicegomez9372]

Wow this is sooo educational and eye opening. Makes me realize I have so much trauma to heal from. This is incredible

[@leathompson9928]

Your dad is a great guy!! I know him through a family member who goes to the AA rooms with him. I’ve been to the camping trips, apple picking and etc. Great guy and you are very blessed to have him as a father!

[@amandaf3601]

Wow that’s amazing of him to do this and be actively working on himself

[@keeliedesa797]

thank you so much for sharing, the vulnerability, self awareness, and accountability.

[@jamiemedland]

Wow needed this as I’m healing from my narcissistic parents. In therapy now. Wish I didn’t have to fix myself now but proud for doing the work they didn’t.

[@Samkelly32]

You should be so so so proud of yourself❤️

[@jamiemedland]

@ this means so much to me thank you

[@taylorrc-m4q]

i really loved this video. you are both so emotionally intelligent and he’s doing amazing with bettering himself

[@queenb1779]

I loved this episode and ur dad is really the definition of hard work pay off❤

[@nicoleeee0504]

I love these types of videos, it would be so cool to see another future podcast ft your dad