German Soldiers in Video Games

[@SquireComedy]

We've been working on this members website for bloody ages. Like everything around here, It's homemade. Now, whilst you're checking it out, I'll get the muscle suit off. www.squire.army/

[@GunnerHeatFire]

Squire army! Brilliant!

[@SquireComedy]

@@GunnerHeatFire I always wanted to join the army. Sadly, although this video might imply otherwise, I'm terribly out of shape. So, I made an army.

[@GunnerHeatFire]

@@SquireComedy The smart decision obviously.

[@venstoma]

​@@SquireComedy Very much in the same boat myself But fret not, for this ain't too bad of a gig is it eh?

[@SquireComedy]

@@venstoma Pretending you're in the army is bloody exhausting, I've found.

[@unsuisseegare1291]

"that's not my real chest" I think it's obvious that the real squire is much more jacked

[@SquireComedy]

Biceps the size of Bournemouth.

[@Karelwolfpup]

@@SquireComedy permission to shout "Bravo!" at an annoyingly loud volume, sir?

[@RandoComandoStudios]

squire has h cups

[@Oskovian]

@@SquireComedy Crickey! he has muscles larger than London and Surrey combined, Luckily we ANZACS have MUSCLES LARGER THAN THE AUSSIE OUTBACK!

[@TIMOR-OWZAT.]

I'm getting a "Lord Flashheart" kind of sensation 🤔, hmmmm.

[@nope5488]

Squire is the only channel where i actually watch the sponsor because the marketing isnt total shit

[@SquireComedy]

I'm especially glad of this today, because we're our own sponsor.

[@jok9342]

Squire and Map Men that is.

[@SquireComedy]

@@jok9342 Bless those men, and their maps.

[@sublimeade]

Internet Historian

[@Rant427]

If you've ever seen I am mo bo because I don't even realize there are an ad because there so good. And I played the games they advertised.

[@DeltaXK144]

The way he says ‘Huh, must’ve been imagining things’ was absolutely golden!

[@SquireComedy]

Took me straight back to Skyrim, to be honest!

[@jm2437]

The player in game: Lord Flashheart The player IRL: Baldrick

[@joostdriesens3984]

But do they have a plan that is as cunning as a cunning fox who studied planning at Oxford and wrote a thesis on cunning planning?

[@mrtom2854]

LazerPig's maniacal villain cackle will never get old

[@SquireComedy]

This role came naturally to him... I wonder what phase of his villian arc we're living right now.

[@kriegsmanofthethsiegeartillery]

Fellow lazer pig fan.

[@b.elzebub9252]

@@SquireComedy Alcoholic terminal retrograde. I think..

[@ralfsfilips4154]

I can't unsee sexy squire

[@Henry-HarrisonClarke]

So mote it be.

[@Odog6856]

Never forget the solder that can somehow take 25 shots because he has a special “boss” name tag above their head.

[@AMadnessAniMaTOR]

Not to forget can also survive 3 whole grenades right under their foot!

[@petrowegynyolc7108]

We need part 2 with speed runners.

[@SquireComedy]

Fastest Squire video ever. People might be thankful.

[@blackdog6969]

The player flying through the air at mach 3 while spamming weapon swapping would be a hilarious thing to see from an npc's perspective

[@Alex-cw3rz]

I think Squire used some photoshop on his muscles, it's obvious he's reduced them just so people don't get too jealous

[@SquireComedy]

That is exactly what's happened here. I've been editing out my shitting massive muscles for years now.

[@Alex-cw3rz]

@@SquireComedy absolute unit

[@nope5488]

@@SquireComedy What a trained lad we need an abb reveal but please edit is out as much as possible i think even old arnold would be jealous

[@chrisspley99]

​@@SquireComedyshitting massive muscles 😂😂

[@Randomclone5464]

@@Alex-cw3rztruth

[@kestrels-in-the-sky]

Hey, it’s not one person it’s a platoon. Just most of the platoon died instantly, a quarter got caught on the environment and the rest are either “accidentally” killed for weapons or glitched out halfway

[@bUh9]

Call of duty 1 did a great job with ai friendlies, its like theyre actually fighting and you gotta get a piece of the action yourself

[@wolftamer5463]

@@bUh9Cod 2 was pretty good as well. They actually flanked, threw grenades, and lay down covering fire.

[@ShapeWortho]

Man, Didn’t know a routine of tea and crumpets led to such physical success

[@SquireComedy]

I don't even go the gym anymore, don't need to. Tea and crumpets, my friend.

[@ciaranReal]

​@@SquireComedydon't forget the biscuits and if your lucky a Scone as well 😂

[@Haifisch66]

You are real Wolfenstein players, real men of culture

[@SquireComedy]

Bloody love Wolfenstein.

[@dabotboi1160]

Dear Squire, as I would love to enlist as a member of empire, I cannot guarantee my long-gevity towards you unique yet entertaining cause. So instead I shall give this donation as a thanks for the laughs and entertainment you have given me, I hope I continue to enjoy your sketches and content for a long time. Blessed that the sun never truly shall set on the squiredonian empire!. Be safe and be well -your loyal conscript

[@SquireComedy]

Thanks for this mate, truly apperciated! I'll see it goes into cardboard based ammunition for the men.

[@Dave0439]

"YOU CANT HIDE FOREVER! huh, must've been imagining things" once genuinely had that happen to me in a game, and the voiceline saying that they will find me actually played over the one which says it mustve been their imagination

[@quietdignityandgrace]

Squire Be Cut! Don't need guns when you're packing an arsenal like that!

[@SquireComedy]

But you do need guns when what you're packing is a plastic belly.

[@TheManHimself90]

2nd part of the video reminded me of Sniper Elite 5. Especially with that whole “I go pull the alarm.” “As long as it’s not been shot at that is!”

[@aziqasri5435]

Shame really we didn't see any 'booby traps inside of that particular poor man's body and it explodes when the enemies near it' part.

[@kirgan1000]

In the old commando game, then you play a small grope of commandos, if a German soldier see you, or something suspect, like a body. They try to raise the alarm. By yelling and run to fetch reinforcement, if not stooped, new German solders will arrive. In the later mission, there number is truly overwhelming, and for all practical reasons, its game over.

[@Winderverse]

Squire, I love all the skits you and Bill do. especially the ones with the Tank Museum in Bovington. But I’d love if you were to do “Every Italian in 1943?” Or “The Allies when the Germans are Secretly making Tanks”

[@SquireComedy]

We'd need to buy SO many cigarettes for that Italian one... Leave it with us.

[@Winderverse]

@@SquireComedyI’m such a huge fan of the 2 British men remaking iconic historical moments in the most British and hilarious style.

[@Earlynyancat]

​@@SquireComedy500 cigarettes.

[@ciaranReal]

​@@Winderversetrue 😂

[@sheynchapman9829]

I really like the Wolfenstien New Order soundtrack, playing in the background

[@scipion34]

Boss sounds awfully similar to a pig. A lazer one perhaps

[@SquireComedy]

Also shoutout to our resident pig, for lending us his voice as per usual. www.youtube.com/@LazerPig

[@ColonelKlink1965]

4:50 Now I wanna see a video game where LazerPig is the final boss.

[@AnimarchyHistory]

I have to call you on the historical accuracy here chaps. We are replicating shooters of the 2010s and I did not see one single QuickTime event. And I wouldn’t talk about unionising if I were you. The boss sounds like a rather enthusiastic chap

[@SquireComedy]

Oh how I love quick time events. That's how I got all these muscles, you know. Smashing those keys every day.

[@AnimarchyHistory]

@@SquireComedyEndless hours of knife fighting in “The New Order” has prepared you to play this role perfectly. You just stand there mashing right stick. A regular BJ if you will.

[@ff05t81t]

**some open world RPG** “Look there’s the player! Shoot at him!” [Game Saved] “Wait…what does that mean?!”

[@Tekisasubakani]

I think I've rewatched the "spawn" intro a dozen times now - it's just perfect!

[@Zaaphod]

Lazerpig has such a great villanous voice.

[@stevenpeeven3169]

You can't hide foreverhuh, must of been imagining things. Spot on!

[@zawarudo9444]

Lord Flashheart has really been eating His ration packs.

[@Immopimmo]

Wooof!

[@mikitz]

'Mind if I use your phone? If word gets out that I’m missing, five hundred girls will kill themselves. I wouldn’t want them on my conscience, not when they ought to be on my face!'

[@ciaranReal]

I Always wondered how video game npc reactions would seem from thier point of view in a funny way and i think you nailed it

[@HibHab69]

We're all soldiers now.

[@NotAGepard]

As a Chinese American, I think it would be cool if you made a keep called “Why Chinese tanks suck” or something like that and use some warthunder footage because no one has access to a ZTZ-96A, then mock them for using cheap plastic to make tanks or that half of them don’t have stabilizers.

[@NotAGepard]

Also, to do the stabilizer joke, ect a key binding to stabilizer on/off or something. Then if you look at the circle with a hologram of your tank in the bottom left, you can sometimes see the word STAB I white. Click whatever button you set and STAB should be grey or very hard to see.

[@captainyossarian388]

Too funny! Especially 3:53 where the NPC is concerned and alert, but then is like "I must've been imagining things." a second later. Also for a second I thought that was your real bod in the thumbnail. LOL I was like "Dayum ....oh."

[@jamesgunn7102]

For some reason this all feels like a play on black mesa specifically. You know, soldiers, gunfire, a badass that everybody's scared of, explosive barrels, ammo boxes by enemy emplacements, that kinda stuff.

[@MrBiznizCat]

The Wolfenstein music goes hard. (Edit : Thank you for the like, I love the videos! Keep it up!)

[@SquireComedy]

Glad somebody apperciates the art!

[@Grilledchees7282]

“You can’t hide forever” really accurate to Arkham city

[@SilverionX]

Oh they're doing a sketch about a thing I like, and it's very good. Happy days are here again!

[@domdom9273]

0:25 "He's just one man, right? - or a woman" lol

[@MajZombie]

Finally a new video! I thought the youtube assassins got you!

[@SquireComedy]

Hah! I'd like to seem them try. Have you seen my chest?

[@WhatIsSanity]

Suggestion: Have a character use a Johnson automatic rifle, called Johnny Johnson and at some point get them to make a joke about it. Also since there's no way you'll get a real Johnson auto rifle, have it be a cardboard prop like the old days! Someone paying via the website give this a shout? :p

[@nathanirick]

I didn't think the Johnson can be automatic Just today, Johnny Johnson put out a video about the Jonny Johnson and a bunch of good films they are in

[@WhatIsSanity]

@@nathanirick Yeah I was inspired 😁

[@conspiracycracker5254]

Found the chjannel on accident, much under appreciated talent , good to see you doing your own thing, many others are going that route, its for the best, wish you the best!

[@SquireComedy]

Thanks, jolly kind!

[@maxflares8888]

the call of duty 2 death Sound effect is amazing call back. well now I think about it I think its in more call of duty's but let me have my nostalgia in peace

[@SquireComedy]

I think It was used from the original, to about MW2? Unsure!

[@arishok5091]

On the the topic of video game soldiers, did Squire voice in Fallout London? I can't tell properly but if you guys did that was super cool, Corporal Nux was great!

[@SquireComedy]

That's us! We had quite a lot of fun doing them, too.

[@nope5488]

@@SquireComedy WHAT IT WAS ACTUALLY YOU i had a feeling but now im actually suprised

[@mikitz]

@@SquireComedy Congrats for making video game history. Haven't played the mod yet, but I'm anxious to figuring out which character you played.

[@ciaranReal]

​@@mikitzwait what character did they play?

[@arishok5091]

​@@ciaranReal Late reply but from what I can tell, they voiced some of the radiant Tommy NPCs and then one proper, scripted NPC called Corporal Nux at the Imperial War Museum.

[@beachside1]

Finally got caught up watching all of Squires videos. I can scratch this off my bucket list. Great videos fellas. Cant get enough.

[@AryanSingh-m5l]

1:56 and i am never blaming my overthinking powers.

[@quietdignityandgrace]

I gave it a Like while the screen was still blank and loading. Because I know quality when I see it. Brilliant. Insane. Bravo!

[@SquireComedy]

Hahah! Thanks old bean, that's jolly kind.

[@Atkinsfps]

One of your funniest videos lol! And the red barrels are so true.

[@DasWirdHykl]

Nice voicelines, "Generation War" - better known as "Unsere Mütter, unsere Väter" is a very good WW2 Drama!

[@shaunybwfc123]

Absolutely love this channel been subbed for years on multiple different channels since the verdun gameplay years ago.

[@GymJAM117]

This is great for the OG Medal of Honor games.

[@b.elzebub9252]

Man, I remember when this was a gaming channel with Squire yelling 'Hun Battle Hop!' as he bayoneted his way through the trenches of Verdun.

[@petermcallister107]

Love the fallschirmjager or possibly Luftwaffe ground trooper with normal infantry helmet. Plenty of fallschirmjager wore the normal helmet,but somehow they always have the fallschirmjager helmet on in films.

[@MyDogIsaWarCriminal]

Squire had to wear fake abs so people arent jealous of his real gigantic ones

[@SquireComedy]

That's what's happening here!

[@magicyber909]

Legends say that there was one German soldier who heard all of these ideas. Who took them all to heart. When the Americans sent their supersoldier, he didn’t just stand in one place, he actively moved around the map. When people were shooting, he could hear it even when it was more than 10 feet away. When his enemies took cover, he didn’t charge across an empty field, he instead took the flank to get the drop on them. He doesn’t just carry a med kit, he actually takes it out and uses it. He wouldn’t lose track of his target when they hid in the bush. He would even find out the objectives in the level, and set up a trap on them. This man was so successful that he was promoted to the legendary rank of the Sniper Jager. Until Karl just busted out his wallhacks and headshot him through the wall.

[@itskyansaro]

The Volkssturm Soldier with Medic Shoulderpads, The SS-Oakleaf Camo Soldier and the Soldier with Paratrooper overcoat and Wehrmacht Stahlhelm, all in one place also is very video-game logic.

[@caseyynelmss]

This is literally the entire premise of Medal of Honor: Above and Beyond which I’m going to play right after this

[@david370cz7]

I like how gamers take everz red barel in games as explosive, like, its a law to make them red

[@vicolin6126]

Gotta love the Murrican player character, very on-point :D

[@bloodrunsclear]

I like how Squire went full Skeletor with the taunting broadcast

[@bruhman2089]

Only a bloke such as Squire could sponsor themselves and get away with it. Truly marketing genius!

[@KarlPHorse]

I like the added touch of some of the German soldiers being barely trained Volkssturm. It just adds to the already unfair advantage that the player has XD

[@NotAGepard]

You guys should join lazerpig’s Democratic republic of elbonia and make the catchphrase “Make Elbonia BRITISH again!!”

[@michelguevara151]

still can't get over your skills with cardboard, amazing!

[@Ghosty-87]

Great channel and I love how it’s sniper elite themed

[@SquireComedy]

Not enough testical shots in this!

[@izelennkhan]

I swear, Lazerpig was BORN for maniacal taunting.

[@FritzTheGerman]

this whole video reminds me of a line from a game where when you get a 50 kill streak: "LIKE A ONE MAN PANZER DIVISION!"

[@j_tech656]

Ahh squire my one dose of absolute peak entertainment(including the sponsor :) )

[@why_did_i_make_thischanel7298]

4:25 Is that F*cking MrBean???

[@SquireComedy]

I get that a lot.

[@why_did_i_make_thischanel7298]

@@SquireComedy Ey man, Stuff happens to everyone...

[@ciaranReal]

😂​@@SquireComedy

[@yo_mama6414]

Germany Suffers! 🤓 Meanwhile the guy who knows how to angle tiger 🗿

[@State_Of_Oregon_1859]

I can’t stop watching. Jolly good show!

[@SquireComedy]

Cheers old chap!

[@State_Of_Oregon_1859]

2 channels with over 500k subscribers seeing my comments collected!

[@State_Of_Oregon_1859]

(Other is extra history on the video on july 16th.)

[@majorhawker4776]

Dang Squire, glad you joined a gym. We can ALL see your hard work you been doing. Now to get Bill to join and get some muscles, that is truly the hardest Level.

[@rocksteady9826]

From Metal gear to CoD, you guys nail it. I have to edit to say., you guys have come such a long way from literal sticks and stones to actual firearms and if not replicas of German mashers, the real thing, you guys deserve all the credit in the World. Coming from an American, I can only wish that you do not give up your Country to the migrant Muslim masses and hold strong but I honestly do not see that happening. Enjoy it while you can brothers and if everyone has the mentality that "someone else will fight this fight" that leaves no one. Good luck and God speed.

[@starkjet2197]

The NPC enemies seeing me come in with 12 helmets on my head and duel welding machine guns. 👁️👄👁️🔫

[@wiledman2430]

Thats actually a horrifying situation. An unstoppable force is headed your Way.

[@HelenBugg]

Amazing as always

[@SquireComedy]

Very kind, very kind.

[@Alaskan_Aviation]

5:51 "Mom have we got any batteries? I need double a."

[@aldibag1]

I've already watched this video 3 times. I may need to contact a helpline. Anyways. It's amazing seeing this channel grow. When I win the lottery I'll do the field marshall package.

[@ericbergfield6451]

LOL, I appreciate the dead battery bit

[@MichaelJohnson-tw7dq]

I want a WORLDS GREATEST DICTATOR mug. ……….please. ………………..guys?

[@SquireComedy]

It's coming!

[@TheIT221]

It’d be genius to have a soldier shoot a hero character before the boss finishes his speech, then the boss is like “wait who started shooting!?!”

[@GnohmPolaeon.B.OniShartz]

When I say enlist to-day my very first thought was, "Those riots must be off throttle if the Squires are squiring."

[@Derekcreeperer]

Finally, a new video

[@bloodrunsclear]

Just been watching historical in accuracy videos by The Frosty 1 and it is hilarious how often WW2 games just have random American weapons carried around by German enemies (and vice versa)

[@dude9318]

It is hilarious how accurate this is They should make a movie where the NPCs are the main characters Lol

[@jfasuba495]

Have not watched the vid yet....too busy laffin at the start when you guys `dropped` in ....YOU DA BEST

[@SquireComedy]

Cheers lad!

[@GunnerHeatFire]

Obviously haven’t watched it yet but i know this one’s gonna be good. Cheers!

[@SquireComedy]

Hope it lived up to expectations!

[@UsuallyTrolling]

Hmm, body's still warm looks like there's a killer about

[@mikeks8181]

This is the Perfect Parody Example of WHY I Won't Play GAMES on a computer or something else! Laughed FROM Beginning to End!

[@SquireComedy]

Thanks! Jolly kind of you to say!

[@JPSRCE1987]

Squire's Army: You're here because you're here....

[@BearInFaith]

I wont sign up for boomstick but I will definitely sign up for Squire! LONG LIVE THE WELSH!

[@mattmadill8668]

Unrealistic they had a main character with a moustache since streets

[@Teh0X]

Squire's Army be the casualty

[@Playsterion]

4:30 Norwegian Army Cap 1940

[@yoface2537]

Those oblivion references

[@AsbestosMuffins]

love the red barrels, they're always red

[@RJLbwb]

I do hope we see more of "Major Powers"

[@angryfoxzd5233]

The soulless face the player makes is perfect lol 😆

[@jamesholland5139]

You guys are artists

[@SquireComedy]

And we paint in niche sterotypical comedy.

[@jamesholland5139]

@@SquireComedy Oo, didn't you guys could paint like that, is the channel profile pic one of those paintings? If so it's pretty good

[@amandahugankiss4110]

5:00 damned close to the mighty monarch's voice. :)

[@orix3434]

Almost wish for a shoter game with realistic ish soldier tactics and awareness and shomwhat realistic accuracy

[@bjsfishingaddiction1581]

I love the wolfenstein references

[@diamondq7s124]

A other video of THE MAN OF SQUIRE, the strongest soldiers that ever live!