Germans like to STARE? (American Reaction)

Thank you for watching me, a humble American, react to why do German people stare?
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[@mssarahmr]

I stare all the time. When a person is interesting, has a cool style or just looks nice. Sometimes I stare without realising it. Just focusing on a nonexistent thing deeply in thoughts and it might happen that there is a person 😄

[@nothingTVatYT]

The people interviewed most probably live in Berlin and some of them seem to have an immediate connection of staring and rudeness. I grew up in a rural area and I think this train of thought was less prominent there, how you feel being stared at much more depends on the circumstances. I think this might be a regional thing even. For example in a subway lots of people are in thought and don't pay much attention where their eyes wander. Calling that kind of stare rude is - well - rude in itself to me. Of course if the whole body language expresses something rude like disgust that's a different story but then again it's not only the stare but everything that's expressed. Beyond the topic of this video clip I think body language and non-verbal communication (something we do all the time) is too complicated and faceted to just focus on the eye contact and disregard the rest. Back to the staring: There is a study that measured the average time people hold eye contact and Germans use a little more time than e.g. Americans. If I remember correctly it was about half a second difference but that of course means that on average an American will feel uncomfortable before a German does. This does not explain all experiences but for sure contributes to the overall impression.

[@kietzi]

this happen to me very often too

[@barbsmart7373]

@@nothingTVatYT Americans do not look for half a second less. The topic is staring. So these are the occasions when Germans stare. Naturally, Germans haven't got time to gawk at everybody!

[@Balion1976]

ok, the word "staring" or "anstarren" is way too aggressive imo in this context; I am from the north of germany, grew up in a little village; if I had walked by a neighbour (the whole village was considered neighbours^^) and wouldn't have made eye contact to say "moin" or give a little headnod for a greeting, it would have been considered VERY rude; and when I am sitting in a café or on a bench "gazing" into the world, looking at interesting people, a little kid goofing around, a dog enjoying itself, I do NOT consider that staring, but taking interest in my surroundings; when someone "stares" at you and you make eye contact, just give a little nod; if the person didn't realize the staring, the will nod back and turn away or immerdiately turn away, do NOT overdramatize, a "stare, gaze or curious look", it is 99,9% not meant rudely or aggressively!

[@linneamai4862]

True, I was thinking the same

[@julianeschulz3186]

I’m from a village in southern Bavaria and it’s exactly the same for me. You have to make eye contact and nod or your being rude!

[@stepomuk9783]

Moinsen

[@1337Arnonym]

I agree 100%. And i add this: if someone considers beeing looked at as staring, as crossing a line, that person better should work on it's own selfesteem. It's not other peoples fault if someone feels beeing stared at, it's your lack of selfesteem if you feel being stared at. Just give a smile, nod and get back to whatever you did before.

[@dunkelkatze4197]

Moinsen! If someone starkes at you and you notice, Just Smile, and Stare Back. You can also Smile and say/ ASK: " Do i have a Cookie on my head? Or what? " And IT gets less creepy. ( Means in German: hab ich n Keks aufm Kopp, oder was?)

[@MaskedBishop]

Germans don't stare. It's just that the socially acceptable time of looking at somebody is a bit longer than in the US. Sometimes it can also serve communication purposes, e.g. when someone makes a mistake, like not wearing the mask properly, you can let them know by looking at them that they should change that. Or when a stranger has a stain on their shirt you can inform them without using a single word.

[@miceears2019]

Nah Germans definitely stare a lot more than other countries (i grew up in Spain, i now live in Germany) even if you did nothing wrong. Its just a different culture in Germany when it comes to looking at others (its not just the USA).

[@Apokalypse456]

@@emilwandel true, when i went to work at 6:45 in the morning i had this one neighbour that i met every day on the way to the subway, we never talked, but after a few weeks we did give each other the greeting stare

[@sebastianderien5823]

Well said.

[@hillbillly6963]

"Germans don´t stare" is a bit of an odd statement to make after watching a video with like 10 germans in it and every single one telling the interviewer "Yes I got stared at" and "Yes I do stare sometimes" 😅

[@kirschdiebin]

Germans do stare 🤣 I just came back from vacations in America and Germans definitely stare 🤣 even in other countries the people don’t stare that much and long…

[@esrohm6460]

it's probably not a completely wrong stereotype that germans stare it just exaggerated. it goes hand in hand that germans are more direct we simply will not hide if something peaks our attention something as far as i can tell is not that common in other countries.

[@Nekr0n35]

yea true

[@MellonVegan]

There is a difference between staring and looking. It's just that the dividing amount of time may be a bit longer for us. But we don't stare, as far as our own perception is concerned.

[@michaelgrabner8977]

What is "starring"? Just to look at people just curiously with a bit of a focus is not "starring" it is just "noticing the other´s presence" so to speak and that happens all the time everywhere. For instance people sitting alone outside of a cafe/restaurant watching others passing by..or in a tramway, subway, train etc...and people from the US have to get used to that because that definitevly happens all the time everywhere in Germany. For me "starring" is when people have a sort of angry/weird/agressive look at others which makes them obviously feel uncomfortable and that is quite very rare in my personal experience.

[@1983simi]

Okay, I can just speak from my husband's experience. I'm German, he is Indian, we live in India and only visit Germany occasionally to see family. People do stare at him and at a certain point it does get unpleasant. It doesn't have to be 'mean' or 'aggressive', but if someone just fixes their eyes on you for 30+ secs without saying anything, it feels very weird. It feels twice as weird, cause I don't get stared at at all when I go out alone in Germany, obviously because I visually blend in. The moment he's alone or we are out together, it happens without fail. It differs a lot though on where we are. In the suburbs and villages it happens more, which I understand, because obviously anything 'unfamiliar' attracts attention out there. You may even get stared at as a city person coming to the village. We get zero or very few stares in Berlin or Frankfurt (people there just have seen it all and couldn't care less). What's weird though is the amount of staring we encounter in my hometown Munich, technically a big city, but mentally very much a village. At this point, when it happens and really starts feeling too weird, he just stares right back, full eye contact, and when I realize it I join. It's kind of funny seeing how flustered some people get when they realize they have been 'caught'. Suddenly the ceiling or the subway tunnel becomes ultra interesting ;) Btw. obviously in India - where I'm the one who visually stands out - I get stared at too of course. Not really where we live - in the megacity Mumbai - but certainly when traveling to places where people just don't see as many foreigners. The big difference is though, that actually Indians stare a lot at each other too. People are constantly checking each other out (women, men, kids, dogs, cats, doesn't matter :p) - mutual social control is strong - and actually when they are 'caught' they often use it as an excuse to interact, so it's not just staring to stare, but they really are then curious to know who you are, what you are doing there etc., sometimes it ends in taking pics together hahaha. Germans on the other hand for the most part seem to not be able to ad that mutual interaction part to their initial 'curious' stare. The moment they're caught they're brain just fully goes into 'abort mission' mode and they're not really subtle about it either XD But yeah, the weird thing is in India we both get stared at - cause it's common to stare at each other here - even if I certainly get stared at more, while in Germany only he gets stared at, and that's just a bit weird. Come to think of it, I get stared at only if I wear something too colorful or some 'immature' print tshirt. Basically, it seems in Germany people lose their inhibition to stare the moment they identify you as 'weird'.

[@arnolsi]

@@1983simi 30 seconds are realy realy long. That happend not very often.

[@justacatwhocantype]

To answer your question, starring is when someone is being featured in a film.

[@1983simi]

@@arnolsi happens to us all the time Munich, even longer than that. basically, however long the right in the metro takes and that person happens to ride along with us. people are completely oblivious of what they are doing and how unsubtle they are about it.

[@unrealversum7729]

I live in Germany and I think staring is actually nothing bad. it depends on the additional facial expression. if a woman stares at me and smiles, that's a compliment for me. I once stared at a woman unconsciously and when I got off the train she made a heart with her hands. my neighbor always stares at me when i walk the dog and looks angry. that's uncomfortable because you know he's staring to find a reason to bully. whether uncomfortable or not depends on how you stare.

[@plutoniumlollie9574]

It's a common activity in summer time to meet at a café or Biergarten, sit outside and do some people watching. It's nothing offensive, just kind of vibing.

[@orbedus2542]

Weird video. I was born in Northern Germany and also lived a few years in the UK and have part of my family in Denmark, and I have never heard of, nor noticed any difference in 'staring'. If someone really stands out like a christmas tree of course I'll look, but I think that's the case everywhere in the world. Staring is considered rude in many cases, or awkward/weird. "Was guckst du?!" is a saying for a reason. I can't confirm this stereotype at all.

[@vomm]

"Was guckst du" is just a saying of Turkish immigrants and yet it underlines the fact that Germans stare exceptionally.

[@haraldmax9685]

@@vomm This is simply an expression of the latent aggressiveness of Turkish masculinity. In reality, you will experience exactly this staring in Germany from Turkish or Arab machos who want to mark their territory.

[@nfreye8828]

Interesting. I grew up in (rural) Northern Germany too and it was quite normal to look at other people on the train etc. Not considered rude at all. On the contrary, if you met each others eyes, you'd give a short smile and go on with your day. Of course you wouldn't sit and stare at others the entire time. It's more a long sweeping look around, I guess. To be honest, I find it far worse if everyone is straining to ignore each other. We are social beings after all.

[@nebucamv5524]

Bin auch aus Norddeutschland. Als Introvertierte fallen mir oft starrende Blicke auf. Ich find das bei uns Deutschen extrem unangenehm. Als ich letztes Jahr in Italien war, merkte ich schnell, dass man da überhaupt nicht angestarrt wird, so als wäre man Luft. Das war eine richtige Erleichterung für mich.

[@DonDadda45]

The staring is one of the most repeated experiences of foreigners who visit Germany. Definitely not weird at all. The threshold of looking at someone is much higher in Germany than in most other countries. "Was guckst du" is also always said by people who did not grew up with German culture either, so it makes sense.

[@lphaetaamma291]

i feel like staring germans look somewhere, and think about random stuff but do not realize in this moment, they are staring at another person. if you wave at them, they realize that they did and probably look away

[@Nazdreg1]

This is certainly one reason. Sometimes you start thinking or imagining things or you listen to music and don't really see what is in front of you. If it happens to be a person, that person gets stared at by accident. But there are other motives as well. Curiosity, attraction/beauty for example. If people look "out of the ordinary" (no judgement involved), they draw attention and I for my part need to actively avoid looking at them. I guess some peple like to feel special and don't mind getting stared at, but some people can't avoid looking special and they would feel uncomfortable. You never know...

[@vvn8066]

It’s interesting how it’s associated with so many negative things. Most of the times it’s interest for something the hairstyle or cloth or body art. If someone realise that I look at them I let them know why I look and give them a compliment e.g.“I love your outfit!“, so they know that there’s nothing „wrong“. Most of the people have thoughts about their look before they leave the house, but then you are surprised when people look at you 🤷‍♀️

[@barbsmart7373]

That's nice- sharing good vibes. We do that a lot here in New Zealand. But no one ever stares at other adults.

[@spielpfan7067]

The thing is: You will not find the skin colour by looking at German demographics. In the US you have white, black and hispanic, while in Germany there is no such thing. You will only find people who were born to foreigners or are foreigners themselves. All the others are just labeled "German". German IDs don't tell the skin colour.

[@MiaMerkur]

Thanks god, otherwise my ID would say "white like paper".

[@michaelst9575]

Thats that coldblooded oldschool deathstare they kept, from.... other times 😆

[@Gnin1000]

A man once came up to me as I was sitting in a sidewalk cafe drinking a cappuccino. He flat out told me I'm a cop (which I really am, but I wasn't on duty). He said that as I kept an eye on people and the area, coupled with having a wall behind me, there weren't many other options. We got talking and he said he was hesitating between a police officer, a soldier or a drug dealer. Based on my outward appearance, he would have rejected the latter two. I had to laugh so much because I hadn't noticed my style at all and I ultimately attribute it to my professional background.

[@Fidi987]

I didn't know I was destined to be a cop. Because I would do the same, but have no interest in working for the police! 😉

[@linneamai4862]

That's a beautiful story!

[@claralova2972]

I always say... "you should better take a picture" reactions are so funny and often people did not even had a clue that they, are starring🤣

[@barbarabenoit3667]

In Germany it is not sarcastic, to wave to a "staring" person. It is no power move. It is just an answer: "Hi there, hello, I see you - you see me. Have a nice day as well!" For me, I interpret the intense glances and the staring as a way to connect to other people around myself. So I look around, acknowledge the other persons, whom are looking at each other as well. They are sharing the public space with me. I nod my head or give a little smile. For me the looking at the other people reasures me: Ok. You are here and I am here and everyone is okay. There is even some sort of communication sometimes - without words - among complete strangers. You observe something absurd, like a mouse in the train station, stealing some breadcrumbs. You look at the other bystanders and all are smiling at each other, acknowledging: "That was absurd" with your eyes. You see a beautiful person with really nice clothes - you stare and nod: A silent compliment. When you walk and somebody comes towards you. You communicate through your eyes and negotiate your paths, so you do not bump into each other. For me, there is no aggression ore flirtation in our german "stare culture". I feel unsafe if someone does not look even for a moment, or worse: looks away to avoid a stare. Are they ill? Are they unwell? Do they need help? What is their reason to not acknowledge the other people around them?

[@kevanerdelaghetto]

Can you react to "America first - Germany second". It's a German comedy bit describing Germany to Trump

[@DoNotBlink.]

YES and it even as subtiltes in english ❤️

[@DoNotBlink.]

As a german I can say: yes we stare, but normally it‘s when you get lost in your thoughts or are in some way curious about a person. I personaly love fashion and tend to stare at people I think look cool 😅 same with tattoos ( I‘m tattooed myself) if someone has beautiful ink I get lost in it. I would like to have the courage to tell people what I like about them and why I stare, so they don’t feel uncomfortable and give a little compliment but I‘m too shy.

[@christineperez7562]

Yes

[@kikijustme]

Agreed

[@barbsmart7373]

I am a New Zealander, living in New Zealand. Many times I have told ladies that I really like what they are wearing. Usually the clothing is a bit unusual or hippystyle. Every lady looked quite chuffed- happy that I had commented. We also ask questions about babies or admire people's dogs. We may comment on a vintage car or certain motorbike. We don't call it smalltalk- that is more of a German way of speaking. We have a chat. It could be a little chat, a bit of a chat, a korero, or more of a yarn. It's NOT called smalltalk around here. With people we haven't met before, it is usually a short chat, or just a nice comment.

[@OHshepard]

I think it's more of a scanning of the environment.

[@kresse9826]

In my area there are grandmas or older ladies that like to sit at the window smoke all day and stare at people outside :)

[@MMoo-bb4sr]

Ich bin 190cm groß, wiege 130 kg und bin stark tattooiert. Auch auf meinem Glatzen Kopf und IM OHR. Ich spüre die Blicke, auch von Kindern. Ich finde es lustig, und auch ein bisschen schmeichelhaft. Also mir gefällt es. Oft kommt man auch dadurch ins Gespräch. Ich sehe gefährlich aus aber wenn ich lächel und anfange zu Reden sind die Menschen meist positiv überrascht und freuen sich etwas über Menschen wie mich zu erfahren und zu verstehen.

[@Sypaka]

In Deutschland funktioniert das ja noch. Aber geh mal nach Japan, die denken du bist n Yakuza. :D

[@MiaMerkur]

Ich wuerde definitiv niemanden anstarren oder ansprechen, der gefaehrlich aussieht.

[@cireenasimcox1081]

Ryan, the way you said you'd feel? Yep! That's it - every time you walk out of your flat in China. Not only do people stare...at bus-stops, or if you yourself have just stopped to look at the view; they actually would form a circle around you and stare you up and down starting at the shoes (because Westerners have feet like boats!)and work their way up. Sometimes in total silence; and sometimes discussing you out loud. When you walked down the street they'd turn around to stare and I twice had the supreme pleasure of watching people on bicycles turn around to stare and go straight into a telegraph pole.😂 But, yeah, when I first went to live there it was pretty disturbing. I'd think "Shite! Have I got spinach in between my top teeth?" "Bloody 'ell - have I tucked my skirt into my knickers?" So one day I marched into a hairdressers & told them to dye it fluorescent pink. If people were going to stare then I should be kind & give them something to stare at. And sure enough it did! This was way back in 2006. But I never gave a damn about being stared at after that; 😊and I've been pink ever since.

[@dewatcheso]

Especially older people do stare a lot here. There is this hole thing of seniors sitting right behind their window for HOURS and just staring at people on the street. And most of them don‘t care if you look back at them.

[@phiobe6043]

I tend to stare into space when I'm thinking, more than once I've looked directly in someone's direction without realizing it! They probably thought I was some kind of psycho 🫣

[@samyagdrsti]

That social awkwardness, that discomfort with the natural occurrence of meeting someone else's eye, is as typically anglosaxon as the fear of nakedness. Though Japanese look away, too. Staring's not just German. In Latin cultures, from both sides of the pond, we'll stare directly into your soul or focus on any situation attracts our attention. I've noticed people from Middle East and other regions also look at you directly. For us, no direct eye contact is actually rude, a sign that you may be hiding something. Even when staring at a stranger, why avert my eyes if they notice... If my motivation is honest, there's nothing to hide. Tbh, all the eye rolling and evasion when speaking to British or American people confuse me. Are you shy, easily distracted, lying? Am I intimidating you, boring you? What's going on? LOOK AT ME!

[@emmasly123]

Very interesting feedback. Thanks. 😊

[@ThePraQNome]

lol in Latin cultures is very rude to stare at people... Idk where did u get that information from but it's wrong.

[@samyagdrsti]

@@ThePraQNome From the countries where I was born and have worked in or travelled to (from Argentina, Brazil, Uruguay, Chile and Colombia to Italy, Spain and France.) I've also travelled to the UK, Poland and Germany, which is why I can compare. (I was actually born and raised in a German colony in Argentina from 4 European grandparents - one of them German - and have the chance to meet people from different places due to my work in the maritime world.)

[@hmvollbanane1259]

Exactly the same as with us Germans. We actually even have a couple of idioms refering to looking someone in the eyes. E.g. "not being able to look someone in the eye" means that someone has a very guilty conscience. "Being on eye level" means that you are equally good at something or if you are "talking to someone on eye level" you are talking to someone as your equal. "Look me in the eyes" is also a sentence every German got to hear countless times while growing up when questioned by a teacher or parent about some misdoing

[@cheshirecat1611]

When I was in England, I noticed that people were just NOT looking at me. here in Germany, when you are in a rural area, you will look at someone and even greet them if they walk past you. that's just good manners. You will look at people who pass you and they will look at you. it's just a kind of acknowledgement. you can also briefly nodd at people. so, as others have said: the length of looking at someone where it is socially acceptable is just longer in Germany than in other countries. it's nothing bad, we just like looking each other in the eyes sometimes. and I have heared in a lot of videos from foreighners that they consider our normal eye contact to be "staring". this video talks about something completely different, though.

[@AltIng9154]

It is a crime .... in the UK?

[@cheshirecat1611]

@@AltIng9154 what is? looking at people?

[@AltIng9154]

@@cheshirecat1611 Yes, if I got it right?! Maybe a Londoner knows more .

[@cheshirecat1611]

@@AltIng9154 that would be totally wild!

[@toomuchinformation]

It must be different in a city though.

[@waaaazzzzzuuuuuppppp]

"he can probably hear me staring at him"😂

[@meladversity]

they should define the word stare before they ask those people. for foreigners everyone stares because the accepted time to look at a stranger is just longer in germany than in other countries. what they mean when they ask "are you staring at other people" is different than what the person being asked thinks they mean. when i was in the US people would constantly start smalltalk on the streets and i didn't know why, when a friend told me it's because i was looking at them for such a long time so they think i want a conversation. for me i was just going through my day looking at people/things as i do at home with definitely no intent to stare or communicate with strangers in any way.

[@ingevonschneider5100]

I am German and I never noticed that they do. And it is not allowed. My parents told me at a young age: Dont look at this person, that is not polite.

[@dan_kay]

Just looked it up: It is allowed. There is not a single law in Germany that forbids me to look at people for an undefined amount of time as long as they are in a public space. Your parents were lying to you.

[@fr3ud_4137]

@@dan_kay bruhv

[@ingevonschneider5100]

@@dan_kay Are you being sarcastic or so stupid to think that social norms can be found in a legal book?

[@PliuNoShi]

I practice "Löcher in die Luft starren" (=staring wholes in the air), it's basicly staring without much blinking into the world, daydreaming and actual seeing nothing really 😅🤷🏻‍♀️

[@wisemantellsyousomething1134]

Once, I came back home and my neighbours (some older couple) 30 yards away, were just staring at me. My first intend was to get away, but I just tried to relax, stayed next to the car, calmly looking back at them. They didn't even flinch just went on watching me. After maybe 30 seconds they slowly walked backwards(!) around the corner into their house, holding eye contact to the very end, it was hilarious. :D

[@11pusteblume]

I would say that staring is a thing in germany. i noticed that when i moved to Vienna, my boyfriend often reminds me not to do it. 🤣

[@Falk4J]

Up and until this video I didn't even know that staring is an issue here around. I almost find it silly to come up with a video like that. Of course if you are asking random people they might come up with situations but most of the people in the video are not exactly reporting personal concrete experiences but are just rambling theoretically. Does staring happen? It might, especially if you're wearing an outfit which is kinda uncommon, like when I am wearing my Australian outback hat on the Munich subway. But I don't care people looking at me because if that. But I never experienced any provokative kind of staring, like, never. Maybe I am just insensitive to the subject. I myself found myself staring at people, from a distance though, that might have tattoos all over their face or when I might see some attractive lady..but I am not staring for hours, it's just to catch a glimpse of the sight of the person. I never would stare anybody into their eyes like e.g. boxers do in a stare out... that's just ridiculous. Also this video is done in Berlin the most irrelevant city for a topic like this in all of Germany in my opinion. Because of the unique composition of people living there it's all but representative for the rest of Germany.

[@DonDadda45]

Why silly? This staring thing is one of the most repeated experiences of foreigners who visit Germany, it's a huge topic. Many think it's due racism or anything like that, but it's just a different cultural norm. What others call staring, we just call "looking at someone".

[@Falk4J]

@@DonDadda45 Makes sense. Thank you!

[@DonDadda45]

@@Falk4J No problem. As a German you don't understand it because you just don't notice it.

[@skypeera]

This is a very huge and complicated topic. And it definetly depends on the region you are. If you are in a small village, everybody is used to know each other. At least everybody has seen everyone multiple times. If two people pass by on a sidewalk then, it is usual to greet while passing by and just say hello. Since it is usual, but probably some might not, they look at each other. Some might call it staring, but it is rather evaluating what the other person is intended to do. Does he avoid eye contact? Does he try to hold eye contact to say hello? Might he even want to introduce himself, or have a first little chat? If any unknown person is on the move, they simply catch the others eyes, since they know everyone else, exept this person. They may ask themselves is he well-disposed, or is he not? There is a huge corporate feeling, if not. In a big city it might be different, also depending on where you are. There may be districs as familiar as those village guys mentioned before. Or there may be a district with a higher crime rate. If so, people would ask themselves quite different questions like what does this stranger want from me? Is he a thief? A violent criminal, just waiting for a reason to become angry? Or does he simply think I am attractive? I don't know, but I rather be careful. In some other places on the other hand there might be even other reasons. Like in a park or subway. Many people are lost in their thoughts and don't even know where they are looking to, or that they are looking at a person. Those are kind of ruminant situations and I often woke up from my daydream, realizing I was looking at a person all the time without seeing them. Mostly they didn't even get it, but I feel awkward in the moment I realize it. Some might get it and feel like they are being stared. But if they see I am "waking up" they know I was looking at them, but I didn't really see them. Some people are looking at others, because it is simply a part of their personality. They are interested in everything and everybody they see and look at them. Some love their gossip. Some are lonely and wish they had a dialogue partner. There are as many reasons as humans exist. I would not call it staring everytime, but many germans are just used to look at others for their own reasons. Sometimes they even look judging, because some people are doing something odd or without much skill. The last case of staring that comes to my mind are special cases like accidents. Like an old lady falls while passing the street. Some hurry to aid, some others look at her, then look at the environment whether there are approaching cars and stuff to warn them and to avoid more harm. Some others look at all this, willing to help, if more help is needed and finally and unfortunately many just stand there and stare. They neither help, or want to help. They are just curious onlooker. Nowadays there are more and more curious onlookers, way more than some years ago. It is a pity. But that's the way it is.

[@fr3ud_4137]

When two people meet and stare at each other it's sometimes calles "Blickkampf" what literally translate to "glimpse/glaze-fight"

[@SidMaron]

I stare A LOT! 😁 But always in a positive and curious way. Also, since I'm pretty shy, I look away pretty quickly if someone looks back. But in general I don't see why I shouldn't look at other people and be curious about them. ☺

[@michaelst9575]

*I love your roasts* 🤣 oh how ppl look like

[@linneamai4862]

I think that there should be a difference between an "evil" stare and an more positive or envious stare... I tend to look at people a lot when I am bored, thinking something like: Oh you're bag is gorgeous or I'd love to dye my hair this colour but am too afraid to actually go through with it... Personally I am afraid of a negative reaction and don't stare at people that seem to dislike it or just seem a bit dangerous to me. Further I personally think it's nice to be stared at some time. For example, when I take the effort to doll up, than I actually kinda want to get these glances

[@lemsip207]

I don't like the anglosphere culture where you can't stare at a stranger for more than half a second. It makes life very restrictive. Half the time when I am looking in somebody's direction I am thinking of something else or looking through them not at them. I don't like to look into people's eyes when they are looking at mine for long. I often focus on the nose or mouth.

[@simonl.6338]

I think this video is a little misleading. Possibly has to do with it being shot in Berlin and the interviewer using the word "anstarren". What the people they interview describe is actually staring at someone because of fancy clothes or something unusual. What most people who come to germany describe as "the german stare" on the other hand is something different. It's just like when you enter a room or train with people in it, or walk towards someone on the street you'll look at the other person slightly longer than you would in the US. Also you might hold eye contact slightly longer than in the US. Berlin isn't really representative of that though because in my experience people in Berlin especially will go out of their way to have a certain uninterested cool look on their face and it's even pretty uncommon that people in crazy outfits get "stared" at because there's so many people looking very unique there.

[@ani2701]

12:45 The easiest way to make people look away in Germany (if they stared at you for no apparent reason) actually is to smile at them. For whatever reason this confuses most Germans and makes them realize that they have been staring and they'll most likely look away immediately. I do believe that most Germans aren't aware of their staring and they probably wouldn't call it staring most of the time, either. They would say that they watch the people around them and this seems to be a German sport for everyone. There is no harm intended and there is no particular reason why a person might "qualify" for being watched a little. It might be their clothes, hair cut, a particular interesting voice that caught your attention, skin color or simply pure coincidence. I believe that Germans are just interested in the people around them and sometimes overdo it a little. I don't mind people looking at me, but what really freaks me out if someone looks at you (not even stares) and then says something to another person or even whispering while still looking more or less in your direction. This always feels like that person is talking about me and this happened to me a lot more in countries other than Germany than in Germany itself.

[@linneamai4862]

Stay positive XD Maybe they just told their friends, that you are really good looking.

[@armitage9204]

Germans are "staring" because we are more skeptical in general. We are more observing/ analyzing than interacting in my opinion. And we are "eye people". So many things have to fit our eyes or fit in the pictures we have in our heads. If something is different, we take a look, maybe think about it, adapt it, and fine. But this takes a few moments. Most of us don't smile while "staring" because most of us are shy to strangers. But the urge to analyze is there, despite the shyness. And of course do people stare at a good looking, tall and black dude. And you were right when you said you'd take a look at the eyes of the bald white dude. Some people are fast with "feeding" their urge, some people take more time. But staring Germans don't stare because they don't like or want to curse you. The exception is when you missbehave. Then you'll get that "you suck" staring. This counts for the vast majority of Germans.

[@Terra_Incognita201]

First reaction of staring: - “Can I help you ?” - “You got a problem ?” same in Germany : - “Was willst du ?” - “Hast du’n Problem ?”

[@thb3306]

I've become really self-conscious about looking at people. And realised that I feel it is really rude NOT to look at people (i.e. acknowledging their existence). I stress that I do not mean staring but just looking. It's hard to explain really 🤣

[@robertbaltha3371]

Wow? That woman from Berlin thinks no here no one would stare at PoC, but in rural Bavaria? But she's all progressive and has no presumptions about other people elsewhere🤪

[@weirdcultist5025]

Right. Maybe people from Berlin don't realize, that the rest of Germany is as diverse as our capitol. I live in rural Bavaria. And if I leave my apartment I hear about 3-4 different languages and meet people from all corners of this planet. And I'm sure others regions are similar.

[@Viseur]

In another video you show yourself amazed at how freely Germans let their children run around in public and how great the sense of security is. That is one side of the coin, the other side of the very same coin is the "staring". In Germany, people keep an eye on each other. If you start messing up, expect to be taken to task for it by strangers. If you need help, expect someone to take care of you, even if you don't ask for it.

[@ShoreVietam]

People are just more interesting than stuff. :3 Also, we practise stare-battles all the time! :-> A smile often gets answered with a smile or sometimes flavored with a friendly 👋 or 👍 to compliment their style. Confirmed, totally normal. 😊👍

[@Eva-sn1kf]

I am german and very tall, especially for a woman. I get stared at regularly from the moment I walk into a public area. Most people watch me and smile, but around 30% of the people stare at me. I can classify clearly between watching or just looking at me in an interested/sympathetic way and a shocked stare. Some people even tell their friends „look at that woman“ or point their fingers at me. It’s extremely annoying and hurtful to be stared at constantly, and Germans definitely do it, if you’re somehow Different than the usual person. But to get back to the original topic: I didn‘t see much of a difference in other countries. I visited most european countries, as well as some asian and african countries and the US, and they all stare at me. I don‘t get it, I mean I look at other people too, but I make sure to not do it in an obvious, unpolite and weird way. Standing there with an open mouth, turning around to see me in more detail, taking pictures of me without asking as well as asking me about my height without even saying Hello beforehands, that all happens on a daily basis once I walk around outside and all people in the world, except for me, somehow seem to be okay with that😂 i guess it always depends on the person - If you have something people seem to find interesting, shocking or something else, you get stared or looked at. Wether it‘s a stare or just a look seems to depend on the person as well - some just are way more polite than others. So folks, please make sure to not stare at other people, especially not for reasons they would maybe not find overly flattering.

[@The_Panther]

Once I saw someone getting mad for being stared at. It was in a train. The Guy was starred at because he wasn't wearing a mask (you had to wear one). he got mad and ask if he is in the zoo or why people would stare at him.

[@meisterwu8922]

The Zoo classic.

[@lienbijs1205]

Sounds like the typical person who is searching negative attention just to get the chance to argue.

[@Torfmoos]

The Land of the free - don t look at someone cause you might be shot. So better look away and smile.

[@howtoleague9123]

He can probably hear me staring at them ... that got me :D

[@tic-tacdrin-drinn1505]

Sometimes I stare at dogs. They rarely stare back.

[@kokuyo1315]

What's your hobby? Him: oh yk, the typical- staring at Germans

[@fiestahossa9512]

Stare-oids, 5 Germans sitting in a circle? Staring-wheel

[@varjo.]

For me I love just looking and observing people and their behavior. It’s got nothing really to do with anything related to the way they look or behave I just generally enjoy observing people especially when I’m bored sitting in the train. I feel like people from other countries are offended by staring because for them it’s usually related to something bad, a bad opinion, bad intentions, but here it’s just a regular thing. People watching instead of looking at your phone or something. Personally it’s my favorite activity. And if the other person catches you you just smile at them and then start watching someone else. And if I notice someone is staring at me, I usually just smile at them and then return to whatever I was doing, if it’s someone creepy I’ll stare back at them just to see if and what they are planning to do and you just straight up staring at them usually causes them to look away but that’s it I mean what else are you gonna do.

[@robinraadhi2541]

Been living in Germany for 15 years now and I can definitely say it's a German thing. People just don't give two shits lmao. Of course a lot of people don't stare, but I'd say the majority do.

[@mac44x]

in berlin streets we say " do you want a picture ?" and in this moment he will chill and dont look anymore xD

[@yvonnel.9133]

It depends on what person stares at me. Mostly when I realise that someone stares at me I start smiling 🙂 I am obviously a typically german because I also stare sometimes. But always with good thoughts, never angry. I admit I love stare battles 😁

[@grandmak.]

If I feel uncomfortable being looked at in a certain way I ask the person " is there anything wrong with me?" and usually they blush and look away.

[@JohnDoe-xz1mw]

confronting every person that stares at you in germany is a full time job, its just not feasable.

[@JohnDoe-xz1mw]

i have a different theory, germans are very tribal which means if you enter theire surrounding they start feeling, for the lack of a better word, responsible for you. not sure how to explain it so i try it with an example: you go to a restaurant put your jacket on the chair, and your wallet on the tabel, then you get a phone call and absentminded walk away, there is a 90% chance that someone is gona run after you with your stuff, and they know its your stuff because they were paying attention (staring). Another example of this is the comparativly extremely high amount of incidents where walkers by rescue kids that fall into rivers / pools etc. Thats because the sourrounding people didnt notice the child once it starts screaming, they already payed attention before it became a situation. (I saw this in a documentary aboutlife guards or better the lack thereof in germany where the conclusion was basicly everyone is a lifeguard in germany) the point is not all the staring but some of the staring comes from a culture that is more based on a group than individuality.

[@JohnDoe-xz1mw]

btw im german and i hate it most of the time, but sometimes it comes in handy, i would have to buy alot more cellphones somewhere else.

[@marsa74]

It‘s smalltalk without words.

[@nerdineverythingnerdinnoth4984]

I‘m a stare-er(?), and have to say that at the core the reason is always that there‘s something familiar about the person, that invokes thought and emotion of any kind. You just have to be careful to not a: connect these things with character evaluation, and b: let that cloud how you treat the person, if it happens that you interact. If you think about a and b while staring, it‘s a great way to confront stereotypes and prejudices you might hold.

[@dasbertl]

I am a german and I don't like to stare and to be stared at at all. As I child I looked at all the signs and advertising posters I could find and (if there was something to read) read them to even minimize any eye contact. That is why I'm glad to have a smartphone nowadays so I have something to rest my eyes on 😅

[@berfin_elli]

I actually had a teacher who taught us to stare back as a sign of self-confidence. That was in 6 th grade tho so in the age of 12. lol She said: they will stop staring, when you stare long enough. This considers the real staring. The other kind of staring which lots of others mentioned in the comments below is way more common or not that problematic. I'm actually one of them who is waving or smiling, when I see someone "staring", and most people smile back or seem to be happy to be greeted. :) I think we also have internalized to stare instead of being just straight forward and making complments. I started changing that and just giving compliments, so people would understand the reason for me "staring", which often makes them happy. cause who doesnt like compliments? :)

[@sorryforbatenglish]

Is there a reason you focus on Germany? You plan on moving there? In any case, enjoying these. Greetings from Lower Bavaria / Upper Austria.

[@MaskedBishop]

He doesn't. He also has react channels for Australia and the UK (maybe even more). I think he only does that to earn money, but only he knows for sure. "Ryan Was" is the Australia channel. The name of the UK one I haven't memorized unfortunately.

[@emiliajojo5703]

Like Alpha Beta...said in the comments,I often am in my thoughts,not even realizing the staring.and often I just like to watch people.

[@Fidi987]

7:57 It's just like: if you were passing that girl in the street, you might do a double take and wonder, huh, did she really have purple hair or did I imagine that? And then take a longer look to answer that question. It's nothing mean, most of the time it's either things that irritated you or that you admire, rarely also things that you find extremely ugly (clothes, hair style etc.). The vast majority of people you pass on the street you barely notice, so it's not that often!

[@MichaEl-rh1kv]

There may be some rural districts where only a few coloured (or simple not-looking-like-most) people live and where the "indigenes" are surprised by unusally looking people, so start staring. (But there are many small Bavarian villages which have native people with dark skin now (some fathered by GIs).) I myself experienced rarely to be stared on except in public transit - but sometimes they are only staring into space without perceiving themselves whom they are staring at. Sometimes people sitting on a bench or in a street café let their eyes wander, and sometimes their eyes are caught by another person. But there are also some who stare because they do not like what they see - those are mostly people who are unsure about themselves.

[@Maikel97]

especially when you're among a lot of people or in "boring" places like the train, i sometimes look at people. more out of interest or boredom but not for malicious reasons. but here you are examined and judged a lot from an early age, which is why you often don't feel comfortable because you've often had negative experiences with it. some people are also obviously aggressive and that's uncomfortable, for example when they're drunk.

[@D3__]

Weird... I never thought of basic looking as staring. Everyone does that so I never thought that other countries consider it rude.

[@itskimik]

I always stare at people and i dont really see an issue with it. Most of the time i just find people really interesting, the way they present themselves, imagining what they're like. I dont see any issue with it, you can easily tell if people are uncomfortable with it and i mean the moment i step out the door i am presenting myself to the world, we're all connected one way or another and it's natural for us to be curious about our surroundings.

[@neverrl3379]

You can stare at my ffp2 mask and black sunglasses. You will get nothing out of it. Be as curious as you want to, but I want something as well: I want to remove your mind and your memory out of my life. And the mask + sunglasses do the trick. I never thought I could be free of your pesky memory. But I can. Covid taught me.

[@mercyunselt2035]

I am almost 20 years here in Germany, and I observed to stare is uncommon even my German husband said to me "avoid staring at people (because he knew it is normal for me or as Filipino to stare because curiousity) becuase the person I am staring at might be pissed".

[@andi4022]

I'm a 50 year old lady with green hair... I'm used to be stared at 😅 But one time i was the staring one... In the subway, there was a black man with bright green eyes sitting opposite of me and i was amazed. As i recognised, that he felt uncomfortable, i apologised saying "Sorry for my staring, but your eyes are soooo beautiful."

[@MrMelix01]

if someone stares at you, just nod at them and it becomes a greeting after which they are not allowed to stare anymore.

[@dan_kay]

says who?

[@JohnDoe-xz1mw]

sound sstrange but i can confirm this to be absolutly true

[@neverrl3379]

doesn't work

[@ivorsubasic4013]

I love staring back at people. It so much fun

[@d3m3n70r]

Well, even Julius Cesar already described the fearsome stare of the Germans. But behind this is just the simple fact that you can catch someone's motivations and reactions the fastest via facial expressions. So it comes that we sometimes stare dead straight into each other eyes for no particular reason. Sometimes for longer than it would be comfortable for most people. But that's widely accepted and not even thought much about here. We're just being very attentive. That's all there is to it.

[@MarjoleinNoyceBellingaMobiel]

In Amsterdam you'd usually say 'am I wearing something of yours?" if you didn't like the staring. At the same time.... if there is sun outside all Dutch people flock to the terraces to enjoy the sun, a drink and 'people watching'.

[@philippschell5246]

When it comes to the topic of "extravagantly dressed", especially in BERLIN! Then I understand absolutely why people stare at each other when passing or somewhere in the subway! I find that not bad, and honestly almost provoked by some people! They stand out partly really out of the crowd, and you just can not help but stare or gawk or whatever you want to call it! Sometimes it's just really fascinating! And no one can tell me that these people do not want that so 🤷🏽♂️ There is of course also just the opposite... and the people can one unfortunately only feel sorry... where you should respect each person as he is and how he looks, but that is unfortunately not yet arrived everywhere in the world with everyone...

[@ushiefreebird7470]

I actually do not understand what is meant by staring. I mean, here in France people spend hours on street cafes drinking coffee just to watch all people passing by. Same in a bus. I mean you can either stare on your phone or at people. I personally find it much more interesting watching people. This is also how you make friends. Because if the other person sees interest, she/ he might talk back, or give you a smile. It seems everything human is forbidden in the US.

[@toomuchinformation]

There’s a huge difference between people watching and staring. One of my favourite pastimes was people watching at street cafes. People watching is enjoying the atmosphere and the people in it. It’s more diffuse. However staring is focused on one person with greater intensity; is not the same thing AT ALL.

[@Kuid4or3]

I never heard of that and no, in the Train etc we might look at someone, but will look away like you described if we mace Eye Contact. If the other Person keeps staring there's something they want to say probably. But this is not normal here.

[@lukaswirmsberger6260]

Adding a little perspective - staring is much more common in rural areas than in cities. It certainly is a part of German culture. In cities you don't get stared at as often as in villages. I think it's because in most cultures staring is a rude thing. Some even take stares as a threat. If you grow up in a city you are much more likely to experience aggressive realitation for staring at people because the people you stare at tend to have a different cultural background. These experiences make you more considerate. In a village you aren't very likely to ever get a negative response from people for staring at them. I learned this lesson through the reactions I got staring at Turkish people as a kid.

[@marmac83]

I was in the Marines. Some of the most sturdy runners were a bit tubby.

[@ArmandoBellagio]

Yeah it really depends on the people. Some can get irritated or aggressive if you stare at them here in Germany, especially guys from like Middle Eastern or Balkan countries. Me personally I also get irritated usually if somebody stares long at me for no reason.

[@strange144]

This is a bad explanation. We don*'t stare, it only feels like staring to other cultures. The appropriate length for eye contact is longer in German than in other cultures, so sometimes they feel stared at.

[@neverrl3379]

No you don't stare. You just turn your whole head towards a person and direct your eyes there for as long as that someone is in sight. Not staring at all.

[@annemckervey9023]

Funny that they didn't ask any people with disabilities. They could tell stories about people staring for sure. Many people with disabilies are not part of the every day life of people. Disabled children have seperate schools and adults mostly work in sheltered workshops. It is changing but very slowly. For many people a person with a visible disability is still a rare sight.

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

For the skin color question I might help. We have about 0.6% of the population from sub-saharan Africa. Compared to 12.4% african american and 10.2% "mixed" in the US. We don't track numbers for "race", only for background nationality. So every of the 182000 from the US would be "US American", no matter the color.

[@Terra_Incognita201]

the staring attitude is for sure NOT a typical german one

[@louisa4507]

I think it's funny, that nobody mentions those elderly people in smaller citys or villages, that sit in their open windows or in front of their houses and stare, oftentimes with a very sceptical or even evil look, at every person they don't know. I always imagine them calling their neighbours and describing the people they have spotted to them. I think that this is a very common phenomenon here in Germany.

[@toomuchinformation]

Maybe it’s a throwback from the Stasi.

[@bunterregenbogen108]

5:00 when I was a Teenager 20 years ago not many Black people. Now its more Black Asian Indian people, at least here in the Capital Vienna. The only others 20 years ago were türkish and Jugoslavian people.

[@Daniel-on5jf]

Its not about how much icecream u got😂 its about the taste

[@ThcBanaman]

I think besides the reasons given it's also sometimes a sign of internal agression. It's not forbidden (socially nor lawfully) so it sometimes serves as a kind of "what? I'm not afraid of you"

[@Irg3ndw4s]

I'm a guy that's often just lost in his thought's, day dreaming.. For example sitting in a bus, I have my eyes open but don't realy react to the stuff I have in my line of sight and just stare at what ever is in the direction I positioned my head comfortable. If it's a seat next to a window - score, I just look outside the window. But if I sit in the middle I will most likely stare at what ever my head stops not realy realizing and still thinking about stuff I have to do or wan't to do.

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

One thing that american tourists might encounter is probably based on voice levels. Germans tend to speak quieter than americans, so if the normal american speaks with their normal american level, the germans will obviously look at the person being loud. And obviously people look different, you take a look. Just out of curiosity.

[@ngaourapahoe]

you started taking up staring (ice cream incident)

[@un-näymed]

I never felt like someone starred at me or that I starred at somone else.

[@pyrointeam]

Just like our personal space is much smaller in the Germany than in the U.S. and American often feel violated by how close people come, although it's really normal in Germany. Staring is not considered an offense in Germany, because it is normal to be curious about exceptional things and normal to rest ones eyes on someone or something beautiful, especially when in thinking about something completely different. Normally starring is interrupted by looking away every 5 seconds for a second. If someone stares for too long, people might get curious why the other one is staring, and will may be ask "What?" or "Can i help you?". And i would advise every foreigner to do so. Because people will often either say sorry (which means they had no bad intentions), or even tell you directly why you caught their eyes, like "i was wondering where you got that glasses from" or "You are very beautiful, i couldn't take my eyes off you" or "I like you hairstyle/tattoos/beard/eyes.." it's a great conversation starter. Staring is not considered rude. Staring and smiling is flirting. Staring and laughing or staring and whispering to a friend, that is considered very rude, as well as staring with an arrogant look and shaking your head, or looking angry or disgusted at someone.

[@DalYeosin]

Well I can say there are only rare cases where one is really stared at. It also depends on how the person you're staring at reacts. Personally, I generally don't look at anyone, because there have been cases in which people were hit after looking at someone else for too long. So there are also aggressive reactions to it. In buses or subways, for example, I always look either at the floor or out of a window and I was born and raised in Germany -> Hamburg. My mom always told me not to stare at strangers for too long because it can send wrong signals. So it's also because of my upbringing that I don't stare at anyone. When a lot of people stand in one place you can be sure that at least one person is watching other people.

[@columbalivia401]

I don't know whether this is a thing in other countries or not, but here in Germany, children have so called ''Anstarrwettbewerbe'' (Staring Competitions). The opponents stare into their eyes, and the first one to blink or look away lost.

[@philippschell5246]

Except in the elevator!!! Then only everyone thinks: "...nice shoes... "

[@nupjetrucha7254]

Staring is a Kind of eye communication here in Germany, it can be aggresive or flirty or dreamy