Get Ready With Me | Too Independent for a Man?

[@Mykie222]

I was taught to be independent at an early age by my mom as well. And I do believe that being independent is great. HOWEVER, I realize that I have a tendency to struggle more when I don't really need to struggle because of that mentality. It's important to be independent BUT you should also be open enough to ask for help when you need it. Because you can't do EVERYTHING on your own. But I'm coming into my 2nd year of celibacy and I'm not thinking about being with anyone until I get myself together. In a span of those 2 years, I started a business, launched my blog, got my first "out of college" job, restarted my health journey and more. I did this because I realize that I deserve more out of life and i'm working towards that. I still have goals to accomplish like getting my first apartment, getting rid of my driving anxiety and buying my first car. Frankly, I don't have the time or energy to give to a significant other. Relationships are hard work and I can only deal with one right now. And that is the relationship with myself. Lovely video. Great look! Peace

[@Candicedickinsonllc]

This title really caught my eye👀 I noticed that people have been saying women are too independent . My dad said this to me because I am a woman in STEM , my old lab boss said this because I would finish his sentences (mainly because I was trying to link previous knowledge with his) and try to move faster in the lab and I've heard elders say it too because we want men who are loyal 🤔. Ive been told to be less independent but I just can't stand the thought of not being independent 😂😂😂 and I don't understand why people try and shut us down . I'm sorry I'd rather be a single lady in the lab and adopt a child than become dependent 😂😂😂👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 my mom was a single mom and did great so my and my adopted baby are just going to slay by ourselves and be independent

[@CiCiMoya]

simplycbh "Me and my adopted baby are just going to slay by ourselves and be independent..." 😫☠️☠️☠️🤣🤣🤣

[@superamy213]

simplycbh girl I don't know you but I'm proud that you're in STEM 👏👏 stay shameless and independent

[@Candicedickinsonllc]

A. L. Aww thanks ❤️❤️

[@Candicedickinsonllc]

CiCi Moya I already have countries in mind 😂😂

[@alisonhilaire4170]

simplycbh OMG! The reasons people give to tell you that you are too independent are complete rubbish!!! What I'm reading is people who are scared because you are smart and you won't settle for men bullshit because you need them. My mom was a single mother too and I honestly don't want that for myself or a child unless I'm rich and I have a manny (male nanny) to help and provide an healthy male figure to the child. I see couples struggling with one kid so no thanks!

[@CiCiMoya]

I haven't figured out how to balance independence in a relationship. I've only always been told that a woman should make her man "feel" needed by even pretending to need help or letting him do tasks that she could do herself. My independence definitely has put me between a rock and a hard place. I am so authentic in a relationship that sometimes, in the past, my strength intimidated my partner or made them feel less than. It would be nice to hear how you manage that in your current relationship Maya, especially having been raised by a single mom and not having had an example of a happy, long-lasting couple growing up.

[@shamelessmaya]

That's actually a good video to address cause I def learned and feel so much better about. I used to do and fix everything around the house. Now I ask my bae to help out. He feels good knowing I need his help and I feel good knowing I don't have to do everything by myself even if I can. Its a win win but YES! Def a vid worth doing 🙏

[@CiCiMoya]

I'll be on the look out! xoxo

[@shanboody]

FYI Maya you are ALWAYS a suggested video for me and the other day KZbin issued me a mini poll just about your content! Whatever you are doing in terms of your uploading practices is working so keep it up! Okay back to watching..

[@shamelessmaya]

Shan BOODY 😂😂😂😂

[@1queenpdiva]

I always find my self on her Chanel for a little boost of confidence .

[@LaniaTheresa]

I kept putting off starting my channel saying "I don't have the right set up, I haven't bought my camera yet blah blah" and then on day I just said YO! Get it done lol I bought my camera from QVC and made payments on it because at the rate I was going there would always be an excuse. I started in December and am so happy that I finally put my mind to it. I've come a long way and still have a ways to go but at least I started!! So I feel you with this video 100%!

[@AshtynWashington]

Girl same! I figured my iPhone was good for more than just texting and social media lol so I started using it to film.

[@lovellyXsoso]

Lania Theresa i subbed

[@TrulyKailah]

Thats literally me right now, kinda happy i saw your comment! I'm in college and i wanted to start vlogging my college experience but my excuse has always been i don't have a camera yet, but honestly i might jus start using my phone as a start. Just subbed!💞

[@tanyamuda]

Subscribed girl I feel you please sub to mine xxx

[@LaniaTheresa]

Thank you! I say just go for it. Maya talks about it so often in her videos just starting is a good start :)

[@donwrrybouti]

I don't think you should solely depend on your partner but one of the greatest benefits of a relationship is having someone you can rely on for support. You shouldn't rely on your partner to do everything for you or on the other hand, never allow them to help you out, you need to find a balance. for us independent women, having enough courage and trust in your partner to reveal your vunerabilities is a huge obstacle to overcome. a lot of us grew up in environments where being vunerable was a sign of weakness and re-learning how to be open and unguarded with your partner is super tough. great video!

[@jessicagold444]

This is perfect! 🙌

[@douses]

A lot of women today don't know how to be independent that's why they need to watch your videos about self love and confidence😍 thanks for teaching your life lessons and I'm getting that bronzer

[@shamelessmaya]

I feel like a lot of women I know are "too independent" that men are usually intimidated. But let's talk about that bronzer right?!?

[@ohhbrent6363]

I think in a healthy relationship we should both be two fully functioning adults. I wouldn't want my partner to be completely dependent on me, or I them. It would be extremely unfair of me to ask my partner to carry the burden of holding me up. We should both be able to come together and lean on one another. Anything else is a recipe for disaster.

[@CiCiMoya]

ohhBRENT I think that's where compatibility becomes a topic of conversation: what one lacks, the other fills... The difference between complementing versus depending on the other.

[@SydneeLeu]

good point

[@aeivivi]

I totally agree with this - and honestly it's something I've really been struggling with -- I'm curious to have your opinion because I feel like I can't be objective with myself... anyway, I've always been an extremely driven, independent, hardworking person and then about 4 years ago I was hit with a particularly aggressive episode of depression (I was diagnosed in university but had been able to manage my symptoms and was working successfully in my field in a major city) that resulted in me being unable to work and forced to go on disability. My romantic relationship at the time dissolved and I've been single the last couple years. I struggle with my 'being a burden' and friends tell me not to feel that way but honestly, I feel it's unfair to ask that of a partner because I know how much extra work it is, I don't 'function' the way I used to and I find it annoying af lol. I dunno - it's just never something I thought I would have to deal with and now here I am - because I do believe I deserve love but I suppose I'm not sure what that looks like anymore now that my situation has changed. Like is this a different category bc it's an illness and something I can't help (besides being active and compliant in my treatment and care). I wonder if it's like what CiCi Moya said and perhaps for a time that other partner has to step up and be strong to support while I am sure there are things I would bring to the table that would complement their shortcomings...

[@reeyynnaa]

ohhBRENT this video and this comment is everything to me! It could not have come at a more PERFECT time ❤️ thank u Jesus for using these individuals 🙏🏼

[@linbess1104]

Absolutely @ohhBRENT

[@kiragreen95]

I believe that when you are looking for a partner, you're looking for someone like yourself, but with a different way of solving the same problem. Once you become vulnerable with someone, you're already depending on them to be faithful and loyal to you, so why not depend on them to pick up in places where you may be lacking. You should be able to take care of yourself and your partner should be adding to that confidence when you think "we got this! (life)"

[@TiffanyDArtist]

+Shameless Maya is takin' us to CHURCH YASSSS! I think depending on one another is a good thing as long as you know that if something were to happen and you were to lose that someone, you know without a doubt that you can depend on yourself. Depending on each other is like being on a sports team. You work together towards a common goal and you care for each other enough to support one another, It is a matter of trust and a practice of devotion. However, never lose yourself and a good partner encourages each other to go for their own dreams and will champion that!

[@JeaizaQ]

I fully believe in developing yourself wholeheartedly even when you're in a relationship. Dependence can be damaging! Your partner should WANT you to be independent! Love you Maya!

[@PleasantlyUnbothered]

Hello Queen Yesssss 👏👏👏 Exactly!

[@HulaHoopingHannah]

Anyone else newly single and starting fresh, reevaluating who you want to be and taking ownership for where you're at in life? IS ME. These videos are 💯 helping me stay focused on where I want to be in my late 20s/30s. Thanks for the inspiration Maya!

[@Grace-so1lf]

Dependence is good to a certain extent. It makes you more functional "as a team". That way you pour into each others life. Which builds your rship. But you shouldn't become dependent on each other to the point of losing your individuality. Because the moment you lose your individuality is the moment you place yourself in the position to be helpless should a point come where the other person isnt available. Dependence allows you to do and be more (the same way it helped you with your chanel etc.). LOOOOOOVE your look btw

[@bamdotbee]

Ohnygod okay I just got into a relationship and I needed this talk about depending on my man and whatnot, I been pushing him to do great but I haven't done that for myself yet so thank you for your great advice 😊

[@shamelessmaya]

;bambi girl! I got you!

[@bamdotbee]

Shameless Maya I can die in peace I wasn't expecting this reply 😭💀😩

[@IamCassandraMore]

I needed this! Thank you boo, for allowing people to know you don't have to apologize for being independent. Own your greatness! ❤️️ can't believe you finally almost at 1M!!! 😬😬😬🙌🏽❤️

[@briananharper]

I don't believe that you should depend on a boyfriend/girlfriend but when "issa husband" or "issa wife" YES! your husband should be inline with your purpose and in order for that to be fulfilled it is healthy to depend on one another. In order to do God's Will for your life together, now that you are cleaved TOGETHER you must depend on each other but until that I do. DO YOU, BOO (with the utmost respect for your mate considered of course lol)

[@gymnastlovespugs]

I love this video!!!! Love you shameless Maya! Oh are so inspirational!

[@shamelessmaya]

Thank you! You boos inspire me to keep going 🙏🙏🙏

[@germx1989]

Can we have a moment for that thumbnail! You look so cute!!! I'm about to analyze one of your "how to " videos for my grad school class. We have to pick some type of multimedia presentation and analyze all the greatness in it. Most of my colleagues are probably going to do something waaayyy different...but I don't care. You're awesome and my grad school discussion group will learn today! lol #beshameless

[@shamelessmaya]

I'm here for it! Thanks for thinking of me!

[@Sylverine]

being dependent on your partner is the most terrifying feeling. especially when trust issues come into play. id rather have my own EVERYTHING until death do us part.

[@justinlucas6487]

I love that your always positive! Very proud of you and your accomplishments.

[@FollowCindyLin]

Thank you Maya for the inspirational talk. You are a true inspiration for me and other entrepreneurs.

[@itsarpitatime]

'Start with where you are & you will be handed more' - I like that Maya! I really love these sessions with you.

[@jointandnervewellness]

Yes we depend on each other girl. My garden taught me this. Plants thrive when they intermingle with each other... their okay alone but eventually you need others family, friends, the person who created this social media platform so make dope people can be seen , spread positive vibes, and make a living. We depend on each other ...it's not a bad thing. I think it's about allowing space to reflect and grow more than being independent... we all need to know how we become the way we are...

[@kimberlymasters2386]

I CAN'T STOP LOOKING AT THE DEFINITION IN YOUR ARMS. THANK YOU FOR THE CHIT CHAT.

[@RandomlyOniC]

Lmao at "I use to break SHIIIIAT"!!! This video is so awesome and much needed. I just got married in March and immediately moved to an entire new state with my husband. Legit felt like all of my independence I worked so hard for had just been taken---BUT I had to realize and still realizing that was not the case. It's okay to depend but set limits to that dependence. I choose to depend on you for certain things but if need be, I can do it. I support you but I have to support me first and foremost. I feel like it takes time to know the boundaries and limitations to dependence. Trial and error, too.

[@serenadena_]

Girl I love you so much. You address topics we as women are taught not to discuss. You bring up things we're scared to talk about because it's so taboo in society now days. You gave me something to think about. I think independence is necessary because no one should have to carry another but you have to balance. Everything in life requires balance. You still want to be vulnerable and allow your man to be a man and you be a woman. You guys depend on each other in your weak areas. But again all in balance. Whatever independence means to you as an individual and doesn't belittle your man, that's what you do

[@ZehraArslan_]

6:57 So true. This year i have decided that i will do something with my KZbin channel. I truly have passion towards art and filming/editing. And let MY MESSAGE HEAR THE WORLD! Last 4 years i did work only to have money and be more independent. And not to ask for it. I live with my parents but i feel even that can change. Im at the very begin, but as i took the first step it feels so good. Im more inspired than the 4 years in total. I believe i will connect people, that is my main goal when walking this road. Knowing that i would have struggles, people will try to demotivate me, yes they are, at my nearest. But hey, I trust in myself and God. And since the beginning He is with me. Only He.

[@kimmiecakes4388]

I love when you just sit down and talk. You are so inspiring. I love ya Maya girl all the way from Cleveland, Ohio 😘😘😘😘😘

[@fashionaffectation08]

I love these GRWM chitchat videos!

[@blancavillasenor2370]

I feel like we shouldn't be dependent of one another as much. Like you mentioned about your staff and you. If one day something happened you would still be okay because you know how to keep it going on your channel. Same as in a relationship, help each other out but also remember that if one of you picks up and leaves, you will always have that's sense of knowing you'll be okay financially, spiritually and physically. It's awesome to be in love but it's also great to know you got you.

[@foreverever22]

Love you mindset and attitude towards a bad relationship. "What can I learn?" I got out of a toxic relationship and I didn't grow until I realized what I learned about him and myself/ that women rule even without men. All ya words touched me.

[@itsravenp]

Yes Maya! "Start where you are, use what you have" by Arthur Ashe is one of my favorite quotes. YOU have to take responsibility for where you are and where you want to be in life.

[@TheMagicCrafter]

How on earth do you manage to do your makeup so flawlessly without being closer to a mirror!?! I have to get soooo close in order to see anything. :C Thanks for hanging out with us and chatting, by the way. Always love hearing your stories ♥

[@jrcmes]

I love your strength, it's inspiring! Love it 💚💚💚💜💜

[@theclaudiamind]

6:35 "If you can't start from where you are then you are not where you need to be." 🙌🙌🙌

[@Forevermiraj]

watching and listening to you is so inspiring, organic and relaxing at the same time. thank you for always giving yourself to us 100% Shameless.

[@OrganicHacksByShivani]

I love love love you Maya. I really love it, when you come and talk in the videos. Missed you so much in the last one. You are the one, who has made me who I am today! I see people asking for your help in their career or whatever, but you actually taught me to live with the things I have and things that i can make with it. You have made me a good person and I love you so much! Please upload long videos because I can't get enough of you

[@lovelygenise8178]

Oh how we've missed you! I love when you talk with us because this KZbin journey takes time and you give so much good advice that its crazy! One day I'll be on your level. I'll see you at the top :)

[@ShanaKayLiving]

Preach Aunty Maya! Love this. That's how I approach a lot of things in my life now. I just stop thinking and start doing. My growing KZbin channel is as a result of not overthinking stuff and just start doing.

[@Lets.soro.podcast]

You should be ABLE to depend on your spouse. Being co-dependent is not the same as depending on someone. The longer you're with a person you learn each other's strengths and weaknesses. A good partner will encourage growth in both areas. A good partner will also make accommodations for your weaknesses so you are a stronger unit. If your life is the same without your partner then what is their purpose. Life is about growth! 😘💕

[@lshardy1up]

I feel the same exact way even being just 24, I put so much into the other person that I can literally see in my transcripts for school when I was tripping over a guy. After almost getting into an abusive relationship I realized there was something in me attracting these fools! lol I've been practicing celibacy and cutting back on alcohol/weed for a long time and now I feel way more secure in my faith in God and being able to recognize what I need to feel loved. 😍

[@Rittitz]

You are the best Maya! Thank you for this video, I was definitly needing to hear your wisdom girllll!! :D answering your question I think it's just a matter of balance. It can be positive to depend (regarding your feelings, and not your money) on someone if we talk about a healthy and true relationship. Having someone that you can trust and someone that you know has your back its an amazing feeling. So maybe you can depend somehow on that person. But this is a deep issue that has so many diferent prespectives..

[@ray9491]

I'm really dependent on my bf, but I consider myself to be an independent-ish person. I think it's possible to be independent, but dependent in your relationships with others. It probably is even vital to learn to be dependent to some degree, for me at least. But I'm mainly dependent on my bf cuz I'm in college and he has a stable job and income. We are also long distance and he does the majority of the traveling. Basically, he does a lot lol. He is dependent on me as well, but maybe in more of a emotional/support type of way.

[@Locs4u2luv]

Best advice is to go to the word to truly understand independence when it comes to relationship.

[@JackieAnnette]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years and we just got engaged. We didn't want to get married because everyone wanted us too. We had a lot of issues to work on. Our main things was support, trust, and communicate. We definity depend on each other for all 3 and we are conformable with it. It's all about who you are with and how your personalities click. Being dependent on your spouse doesn't make you weak or less. This is the person that should make you stronger.

[@Genesisimage]

A dependent relationship is bad it can be a little difficult because you start losing yourself trying to support this person all time and it can just feel like you're taking care of a child 👶🏽

[@RandyRyanCandy]

Gurl! you are Rose Gold Pearl your self!! :D One compliments the other for what one lacks like a make foundation (and ain't no baaady perfect). As for being dependent on one another, that's a good thing! As long as it is a healthy dependency on each other, even when one is very independent that person from time to time is going to need guidance and a shoulder to lean on and a pedestal to step on for moral support or any kind of support from their partner or significant other ....Being independent can only go so far depending on who you are. That being said, an independent person is an opulent character and they get things done. YOU are a great example of it :D

[@tashalashell7535]

I can definitely relate to giving your all to a relationship to the point that you neglect yourself and lose yourself in it. I think everything comes down to balance. Being too independent can come off as I don't need you where as being too dependent can come off as clingy and really needy. Striving to find the middle ground and maintaining it is what I try to do in my current relationship. I think relying on one another for support during times of needs is healthy. It becomes unhealthy when the process of relying on someone begins to drain the other person's time and energy that they don't have enough left to take care of themselves.

[@ChadveeA]

i'm surprised your channel isn't bigger as you really do know how to give out strong messages and the audience can really relate to you ! having a post 25 yr old crisis myself (I am 26), I am so glad I fell on your channel! thank you so much! Love

[@jlopez9228]

I have been married for 13 years. my hubby works and pays all the bills, and we go over all our finances. I am a stay-at-home mom of 3 kids and the dog. I take good care of the home and everyone's schedule. I am at a point in my life where I need to do something for myself, my kids are in school and I now can go to school or work. I have no regrets.

[@eVaniwithaV]

I think dependency needs to come from a good place not an insecure, negative place. Because as Christians we depend on God right? I think balance needs to be found between your strengths and weakness. Reaching out for help in any way should be healthy in all of your relationships (parents, siblings, friends, life partners etc). As a person with a disability I can tell you that I am much more dependent in a certain way than most, but when I ask for help its coming from a place of worth and confidence, and you're right, individuals should take time to do the personal work on themselves so they can adjust that BS meter so YOU KNOW BETTER! Great video!

[@perpetuainmotion]

I think it's so true about how when you know yourself/what you want, it's easier to call bs.

[@kimlu_dlc3852]

I really love when u do these chatty videos where u give your opinions and advice. they really motivate and inspire. ♡

[@Esthee_and_arts]

Maya I love you girl you don't know how MANY times you've been speaking me and helping me reflect!

[@sunshinepinayquinones326]

I love this segment!!!! I love you so much boo!!! 2013 I got out of a toxic relationship and in 2014 and 2015 I was going wild and I thought I was doing me but it was not healthy. In 2016 I was picking up the pieces of my bad decisions and now I am focusing on me all day lol. I love you boo. Thank you for inspiring me all day. Love always, Sunshine

[@itsewelina]

I love these get ready videos when you chat with us. I don't know if you know who Danielle Laporte is but I have heard her giving an advice on relationship and she said " Remember you are Not his therapist" This really resonated with me ;-) Keep doing those videos, those are great! One million is sooooo close!

[@helenabarnett]

on dat depending topic, the best thing i believe is loyalty. like knowing you got each others back so if you need to depend on the other half you can, but they can also lean on you if they need too! its all about dat balance haha. great advice as always girl! x

[@keyirl8259]

My mom always says "No one is an island" but she also showed me through her actions to do for yourself until you stumble then you can always grasp a hand to stop from hitting the ground. But when you don't that's when you hit the ground hard and bad things happen. So there should be a healthy median!

[@curvicurve]

ohhh my gosh I can just see 1 million subscribers before the end of July. .@mayasworld can't wait soo..proud of how far you have come Maya. .keep doing you boo.. love from trinidad

[@ivybean3991]

I think having a partner you CAN depend on when you need it and being open to their help when it is truly helpful is healthy. Having a partner that gives you support in a unique way is enriching, but there needs to be a balance there. And I also think it helps to have at least 2 ppl in your life that you can get specific types of support from. Aside from that, work toward being your own best friend too.

[@RauniPaigeO]

This was seriously what I needed. I've been feeling so worthless lately trying to be a "KZbinr" and an artist unsuccessfully by myself. Thank you so much for this kick in the butt

[@MainCourseEncouragement]

You are the best and help me so much! I definitely have been working on my channel on my own to help others and as bad as I want a team, that's how driven I am to keep upload self-care and positive videos instead of waiting for convenience. You've been my inspiration for your whole YT journey Maya!

[@sabinahertzum9728]

It depends on what you depend on... I'm independent - I can take care of myself if and when I need to, but I do depend on my husband!! Not to take care of me financially, but to be my sounding board, I depend on him to tell me if I'm out of line, if I need to take a breath... I depend on him to love!! But I do know that if he is not here I would be ok.... so the 'being dependent' is not always a bad thing... you should be able to depend on the one you share your life with - if you don't, then why be together at all?? You went in to the getting staff thing - it's kinda the same with a good partner... the right partner complements you! You become a part of a whole... and if you don't or won't depend on your partner, then you leave no room for him/her... then why should they stay?

[@hanneke5527]

those real talk vids of yours are always such a slap in the face. a very needed one. love those slaps.

[@jade924_]

I SWEAR every time u upload a GRWM, it really relates to me! So crazy and helpful haha Love you Maya!

[@Martina_E]

Girl your makeup is flawless and your skin is glowing!

[@sawosson]

I think it's a good thing to be able to depend on somebody else. The whole thing with being independent is because one (mostly by force) has to learn how to be by them selves mentally of physical. If you can't depend on your partner to some extend I don't see the reason to be together. Now days both women and men have ways to get a good job, a place to stay, kids if they want, and love from friends. But we don't marry our friends(not that you can't be friends with the one you marry). I think that being with someone and truly feeling confident with this someone is about sharing the things you have, both emotional and physical, and if one can share all of that, one should feel some type of way when that someone is gone. That feeling represents dependence to me but others call it love ❤️

[@Lunamward]

I'm incredibly independent as well. While I love this about myself, it also really hinders me from getting help from others--which is important because I found it's impossible to grow in a bubble. I think in a relationship it's important to be two full people, but my bottom line is always: how is this person going to help me grow (and vice versa)? And if I refuse to rely on them (and them on me) then we can't help each other become better versions of ourselves. I realized that for a long time I was using my independence as a shield because I only saw myself as whole if I could cut every last person from my life and still be okay. And that's not healthy either, because I was using it as an excuse not to open up and to only look inward. I'm happier now that I admit I need help (whether that be emotionally or just something like shooting a video). I rely on my s.o. and my friends, and I've found when I'm more human and flawed with them, they're more human and flawed with me--and that's when we get the best chances to grow as people.

[@BeautyQueenMaria]

You are getting close to a million! So proud of you! You are an incredible person and such an inspiration! 💗

[@kerriganelizabeth3026]

#GetMayaToOneMillion ly ❤️ you're so pretty!

[@Briakiii]

First of all.... you're almost at 1 million !!! Secondly watching you and just your KZbin name really helps me have courage in promoting myself I want to be shameless... I want to have pride in myself and my channel and I'm working on not being afraid of people's opinions thank you for being you !

[@freeham9142]

Love the one on ones. You have to keep a part of yourself. I have to wake up and still know who I am. Independence helps with remaining yourself.

[@partyof2539]

I think that each person generally has their own strength, so it's cool when you find another who may have a strength in an area where you're not strong. Or both can be strong in every area and as long as they share the vision the relationship is solid.

[@Stephanieani]

being independent is great with or without being in a relationship

[@nolakiss]

the best relationship type to me is Interdependency because you are still your own person but you still have a partner to lean on and help you while they are their own person while both of are trying to come together and build a life/relationship. to me when you are either too dependent or independent in a relationship that is when problems start to arise.

[@kiaralovely333]

I am a super independent woman and it is very hard for me to even begin to trust other people, ESPECIALLY men. I know God and I strive to have an amazing relationship with him everyday and I know that he has my back and makes me even more independent and SUPERWOMAN. So when I do meet the one I know it will be hard to let go of my control as well. But for now, I just focus on myself and my future, God will bring everything together in due time (: I love you!! Keep doing your lil chit chats, they bring me so much inspiration

[@jokerdopee]

I Haven't Been on youtube in maybe a couple of months. Today, I finally had the time to sit down and log on. I really feel like this video spoke personally to me . you know when god wants to communicate with you, he will find anyway to make his communications clear... I felt like you were used to communicate us... if that makes sense. I've been making excuses why I can't launch my business, why I can't step out my comfort zone.... I don't have this I need that blah blah blah... if I'm really passionate about my craft left it sail. have faith and be passionate about your craft and let it sail... the tools will come. thank you!!!

[@diamondlife120]

This is such a good convo... and needed sometimes we need to remind women that we need to learn to be independent and it's ok. Everything you stated is so on point!

[@tianavancuy7105]

she is my inspiration , and her makeup always slays , love her so much

[@TieeshaEssex]

Maya you being on KZbin has started a movement! You've inspired me so much! (Ok info done with Stanning 😆)

[@malikshabazz1665]

I my possibly be your oldest follower, but I see you as someone although younger who is in touch with the world and brutally honest. I admire that, and I do recommend younger folks trying to find their way to watch you videos. Especially creatives.Yes I may be a bit "out of touch", but I recognize that you are brilliant. Keep doing what you doing, baby boomer are watching. God bless

[@la896]

I think this video was exactly what I needed right now. It made me turn around, take a good hard look at myself and realise that I'm not where I want to be in life and only I can make that change. So THANK YOU GIRL. I love your videos X ♥

[@lovefreedom4145]

I heard this message regarding relationships once that stuck with me. In emotional development there are three stages that humans generally go through. The first is dependence - the illustration here was a baby and its parent. As a baby, the child relies on the parent for everything because the parent's care is essential to its survival. Eventually that baby grows older and reaches the second stage - independence. The child starts wanting to exert autonomy over its choices - dressing and feeding him/herself, walking, and not always complying with what he or she has been asked to do. The third and final stage is interdependence, illustrated as two adults that are considering marriage. Neither can rely on the other to fill their every need, as that is unhealthy dependence, and neither can rely on him/herself to fill every need, as independence is wonderful but a relationship requires a joining of two people. Interdependence is two healthy, complete, emotionally mature people who could easily be independent but choose to sacrifice some of their personal preferences and freedoms for the sake of the other. The pastor (Paul Sheppard) gave a second illustration for this one based on the verse that says we should not be unequally yoked. Imagine two oxen are yoked together but one is always pulling the other one along, doing all the work because the other is not as strong (dependence) - both oxen will only go in circles. If they are more concerned about going their own way than walking together (independence) they won't make any progress at all. They must be two disparate, competent beings of equal strength with shared goals (interdependence) that actively choose to walk together.

[@lovefreedom4145]

@shamelessmaya

[@Leesa_Vv]

"beat my face, to get out this place" lol positive message! Beautiful results!

[@vidiesel]

Tl; dr: you need to be "too independent" to get through life. But, you also need to be able to share your life when you think you're ready to be in a relationship. And if that relationship ship fails, then you'll need your "independence" to move forward. There is a fine line between "too independent" and pushing someone away. It's similar with your KZbinr analogy. Just as you had to learn to do all the filming, editing, etc., you first have to learn to love yourself. Then when that phase is over, just as you start delegating business tasks, in love you start letting your new partner start to do things for you. It doesn't have to be tangible things but can also mean opening up and being vulnerable so they can be an emotional support system. I don't believe you can be too independent but I do believe that if your partner doesn't feel like he/she brings any value to you, then they will feel like 'what is the point in being in a relationship with you if they are perceived as bringing nothing to the table.' For the partner it'll feel like your pushing them away when in reality you've been so reliant on yourself to get through life, it becomes habit to just do everything by yourself; bringing them back to the question of their value to the partnership. And just like in your KZbinr business, when you lose an editor or assistant, you can pick up the slack when you have to and continue to move forward, the same is in a relationship. If the relationship falls apart, you can love yourself until you find some else to let back into your life (romantically).

[@katiemaria3560]

LOVE!!! LOVE!!! LOVE!!! Everything about this! Great talk about independence and boundaries! Thank you!

[@adriannemonique6090]

This video is so motivating. I feel energized! Thank you Maya! We love you girl.

[@BeccaP007]

You don't even know how much you help me through my confusing 19 y.o. life God bless Maya 💛

[@M3RRY]

9:19 maya! lmaoooo i cannot!!! SHAMELESSLY applying that makeup! hahaha and girl! you got a man lol I've been gone for a year. Okay no more dang comments lol

[@femigemi]

So I'm in a relationship where my partner and I share life's burdens and a unit, because both have areas of strength and areas of weakness. Some of our friends call us a true Ying Yang. The interdependence makes us stronger as well as provides us with more growth opportunities.

[@kadiannaddman3034]

I'm an independent woman, my husband is independent. Separately we can take care of ourselves but together we lean/depend on each other because we carry different strengths (this has nothing to do with lacking). We find it more efficient for our family, more time to enjoy life and just get on with it because no Ones fussing about "positions". Obviously there are caveats to all if this and doing/tending to our own needs and development is important. Our generation are in a weird place we are more free to do more but bound by our thoughts and inhibitions.

[@TruTheCreator]

I think if you use the technical definition of dependent, conditioned or determined by something else, then it's a bad thing. You should never have something in your life determined by someone else, especially as an adult. You should be able to do for yourself. Now, receiving assistance or having someone to lean on is a different thing and that's what I think is okay in a relationship. Because you can lean on someone/need help but still be independent. Complimenting eachother's weaknesses and strengths is the key. And if you do have to depend on people, I agree with what you mentioned, don't depend to the point that if everything ended you wouldn't be able to do it yourself. At least be able to do it yourself before you fully depend on another person. I'm also very independent but I lacked self confidence (working on it). This was such a tug and pull game [wanting to be bold and showcase my talents but being scared that I wasn't good enough] and it still is. But I took a leap last year in starting my KZbin channel and finally doing something for myself, by myself! And I love it! Thanks for the chit chat :)

[@noelcarter2100]

I'm a very independent women, as well. I can relate to you. being in a relationship, is a give and take. I've learned, to be dependent on my fiance. it takes time to learn. however, you can be independent and dependent at the same time💗 pick and choose

[@toonboy4067]

Good for you! We need more ppl to be independent and self sufficient!

[@504CreoleCrystal]

Don't know how I missed this video. I've ALWAYS been super independent. I've been in a relationship for over 5 years now. It took so much for me to step back and actually be dependent on another person. Then I became disabled and I had do choice. Thank God that this man is as amazing as he is. As of 9-1-17, he is now my fiancé 😍😍

[@NuDiva14]

I needed this pep talk/come to Jesus moment Maya!Specifically the point that everything I need to get ahead is right in front of me.

[@RichmondSajini]

I believe independence is a good thing. I think in life it is good to be able to trust people to do things for us if they so wish, but never to build dependence on them to do it for us.

[@TahirRegister]

Awesome question. Depending on someone is neither good or bad, it's inherit. Everyone on Planet Earth will HAVE to depend on another at some point, however the disparity comes in when you choose to stay that way and relinquish tools that can ultimately help you live. For instance, if a Man depends on a Woman to pay the house bills, car note, buy him clothes, pay for dinner, movies, hair cuts, shoes, and lifestyle...that man relinquishes his tools to do that for himself and if she ever leaves, or dies and leaves him nothing, he then will have nothing to depend on except himself, which isn't saying much because he can't do anything except receive. If a Woman depends on a Man to clean the house, cook the food, wash the clothes, take care of the baby, provide great sex, and keep the body tight once that Man leaves She wouldn't know how to clean her clothes, cook, etc. Obviously there is wiggle room, but you catch my point. ..depending can lead to nothingness if you allow it to, and it's an easy thing to allow...

[@arianams6710]

Right you made a great point. Always being on the receiving end or even always being that person giving and giving is doing nothing but crippling that person on the receiving end. Having someone who is strong where you are weak and vice versa is essential in a healthy relationship.

[@TahirRegister]

Essential!! It's Biblical, equally yoked, it works.

[@TheOtherRenee]

I agree. Having a dependent relationship is very fear based. I feel it is best to have a partner that is just as independent, ambitious and free as you. Then you know that their time spent with you is a want and not a need. That is much healthier.

[@EllieMalm]

Your hair looks too good! And about that indipentant thing. I also am a very proud and i need to feel independent but the last year or so Ive depended a lot on my BF who brings in the majority of the money, which was suuuuper hard for my ego, and still is. But I've managed to let it go a bit and think that its just a period in our lives and maybe sometime i will need to bring in the money. Loved the chat!