Get some fruit after a date?! (...Kvon Explains)

If you date a Middle Eastern girl, you don't always get what you want. But, you might get a NECTARINE! 'SHARE' w/ a friend that's dated another culture!
( This clip is from K-von's 1hr Special: TANX GOD! Order Today only on K-vonComedy.com/shop )
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Watch KZbin Live every Wed 7PM pst (Ask K-von questions = it's so fun! NEW PODCAST: "The Right Show" = episodes every SUNDAY ~subscribe!~ Support These Videos: Patreon.com/KvonComedy or KvonComedy.Locals.com Venmo: @Kvon-Kvon GoFundMe.com/KvonComedy #HalfPersian #KvonComedy #BumblingBiden (click these hashtags for more hilarious videos!)

[@BeautyLilya]

Hahaha .. “I screwed up the tradition. You must fix the tradition...”

[@kvoncomedy]

i'm gonna screw it up DOUBLE!

[@joimy95]

@@kvoncomedy you are going to marry a black dude. Xx

[@nitahassan6406]

Did you? Did you marry a Person girl eventually?

[@ahmadfarhat1014]

@@kvoncomedyKvonComedy will you also tell your child to marry a Persian boy/girl? 😂

[@timeless9820]

@@ahmadfarhat1014 no just marry one but in their country to make it official xD

[@zg1000dru1]

As an American with a Persian woman, I can tell you that 90% of this IS NOT an exaggeration.

[@zg1000dru1]

LOL...may well have to go to the show in Reno on 5/15. My woman's birthday and it's close by. Here's one for free K-von. No lie....I had a Dodge Avenger...lol...she made me MEET her for first date. I see her and say "oh my god, you look so lovely tonight." She looks me up and down like I'm small...FROM THE SIDE and says. What does this mean? I looked terrible yesterday? What are you trying to say? This date is over, take me home. I'm like "I didn't bring you" She's like I don't care I am too upset to drive. HOW DARE YOU!

[@bikehunter82]

.....so you have to be rich and materialistic in order to date a woman that at best is only attractive until her late 20's and has an obnoxious family? Hard pass.

[@szonjacook]

What fruit did you get? 😂😂

[@c12-116]

@@bikehunter82 damn son true dat

[@foroughaskarisiahooie4918]

@@bikehunter82 It's not always true

[@amalzuhair4495]

Love how the whole audience already knew that Persian girls like Mercedes and BMW’s talk about stereotypes

[@hannakeinanx]

amal zuhair in cali yeah

[@clara-nt9rx]

Theyre persian

[@vanessaashton8636]

It’s not a stereotype if it’s true, it’s a fact 😂

[@saran5435]

My Middle Eastern fam started respecting me once I bought a Mercedes. Now if only I had become a doctor or a lawyer...

[@seregill13]

What girl doesn't?

[@313Violator313]

i thought in the end he was going to answer "fruitful"

[@azshadow32]

Best comment 👏👍

[@cranknlesdesires]

I thought he was going to say "peachy"

[@hussainali7088]

Hahaha... me too... LMFAO

[@jenniferyuqizhang]

😂😂😂

[@mssummerrose1]

...maybe the Persian mum is pulling a joke on you... YOU said you wanted a "date"...

[@OnionYeeter]

Lmaoooooooooooooooooooo

[@nana-gk1zc]

Hhhhhhhhh

[@ruthaakamonica5602]

His mom is Swedish

[@yaryalfaro5062]

“I messed up the tradition” LMFAO! 😂😂

[@calisongbird]

This guy is so gorgeous, I couldn’t care less what kind of car he drives 😍😍😍

[@kazimierzbem]

clearly you are not Persian ;)

[@jordanshore838]

I was waiting at the end for him to say, "Well I got a peach, but not the one I wanted,"

[@zariDari]

LOL :))

[@bun04y]

He forgot to add that the girl yelled down to her mother "DO NOT GIVE HIM A NECTARINE! He drives a Dodge Charger for pete's sake!"

[@lorireed8046]

Haaaaa

[@cliomuse1206]

Oh, the fruits! I visited Iran in 2014 and people were constantly giving me fruits - when I flew back home, I was made to declare the 3 ton of dates I brought back, lol.

[@BumblingBee-xm4dy]

Holy crap that sounds like a heck of a score bc stateside dates are EXPENSIVE lol

[@ashlo8977]

Kvon is a true comedian; hilarious and really knows how to put on a great show. I had the pleasure of seeing him live last August in Reno. If you get a chance, go see him perform live!

[@rishitachakraborty9783]

I'm so broke that I'll be like, Wow! He has a car? 😂😂

[@jwec9867]

Sounds like that date was a FRUITFUL endeavor.

[@nataliesurinova6812]

i am so distracted by his face but he's hilarious

[@zahratimany3148]

Okay, I do live in Iran and I don’t care if your car isn’t Mercedes or BMW , wanna fix the tradition?!😂 • I just found your channel and love your performances!♥️

[@dacoda6668]

Green card bait! it's a trap

[@chrisr5649]

@rad phill dude it's not that serious why are you so triggered?

[@saadal-balam5233]

@@chrisr5649 it looks like this guy has bad history or experience,, feeling sorry for him

[@khanainthekitchen9070]

@Rad chill dude take it easy

[@kelseycoca]

I ship it 😘

[@mohamedelkayal8871]

I guess his mother's genes were more dominant than his Father's. I mean he has really striking European features, I doubted at first when I heard he is of Persian descent. Anyway this was hilarious

[@jel1951]

His genes look strikingly levantine, like syrian or kurdish. White with middle eastern features

[@stochasticdifferentialeq.1393]

Mohamed El Kayal Persian all have straight hair and Greek features is not about skin color. Arab have African feature big lips big skull big face........ I could never tell a difference between gulf Arab and black Somalian

[@stochasticdifferentialeq.1393]

Mohamed El Kayal Persian are Indo European and I look at his dad in one of his videos looks like typical German guy..... Please stop hating on Indo Aryan people is not my fault Arab have African skull and curly fuck hair

[@Gutians]

Mohamed El Kayal You're wrong

[@jel1951]

@Nintendo Guy00 ??? I hate how people generalise arabs, levantine arabs are COMPLETELY different from gulf/saudia arabs or african arabs.

[@m.r.251]

You are putting our culture to the cutest ways to explain. Thanks a lot Keyvan. Your performance is amazing!💖💖💖💖💖💖

[@EnligUlv]

I’d love to see K-von and a cast of mid-easterners do a comic movie about their common ways like Barbershop & Super Troopers. Comedy built around specific subcultures can be uniquely hilarious.

[@mermaidalone7826]

Dear Kvon, You are the best ever, Please have a show in Germany. I wanna see you ❤️

[@rakhichowdhury6051]

It's almost fascinating how cute the persians are !

[@madelinedanavan9211]

YOU ARE SOooo RIGHT

[@baalqefel1570]

You know what the funniest part of all that was...... THE TRUTH 😅 I have experienced this first hand; well done K-von ✌🏻

[@tnhomestead]

Dad just didn't want you to make the same mistake he did! Lol

[@shethewriter]

LOL OMG THIS IS ALL SO TRUEE hahaha Middle Eastern moms always give a fruits to the boyz if they done good.

[@Ottts22]

do you know why?

[@csommer4492]

Little did she know the dodge charger actually rides on an old mercedes platform

[@alexalevidi]

Dude I felt that fix the tradition part way too deep

[@cms077]

As a blk women dating a Persian, I'm learning so much. Yes, his jokes are right on with the culture. 😌

[@greenytaddict]

Lucky

[@jasontodd2388]

That's because he's part middle eastern

[@rawankhalil8899]

It's okay kvon, just marry me instead, man you are really funny !😂

[@shethewriter]

I love that you're standing on a rug

[@jlim9411]

Honestly, if your man shows up in a brand new car period, that says a lot in today’s economy. Especially if he’s young.

[@sidraMPatty]

It says he has more dollars than sense, lol

[@Royal_dj_ent]

How did I miss this? Kvon is just on another level

[@despinalogotheti6209]

I have a persian friend. It takes him two hours to cook rice. In Greece it takes about 15 minutes. His mother freaked, he wouldn't let him eat the way we do it. hahha

[@ryveralexander8511]

I think because Persian cooked their rice burnt in the bottom, you cannot cooked it fast, once the water dissolved, you have to turn the fire very low not off! I love my rice burnt in the bottom, crunchy, mom used to get mad at me.

[@yaryalfaro5062]

Lmfao!!! What your father said!!!!!!!! Oh my gosh!!!! And the phone call, friend “how was your date?” You “ it went well I got a nectarine” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@buntypatel5953]

Melons on the first row like DAAAAAMNNNNNNN!! 😂😂💯🍉

[@JV-yo1ob]

Mercedes and BMW! That is SO true! I lived in L.A. for a few years and became friends with a Persian girl. When I met her she had a BMW. A few months later she bought herself a new car, and it was a mercedes. Then she liked a guy, but wouldn't date him because he didn't have a mercedes and he wore a trucker's hat and wasn't Jewish. Hilarious 😂

[@paulmartin2348]

Why would a Persian girl want a Jewish guy? Seems every single thing you said was a lie.

[@berxwedanjiyane1821]

”Did you get any? I got a nectariiine”😂

[@kathleent6150]

I'd take a Dodge Charger over a Mercedes or a BMW any day!

[@kathleent6150]

kvoncomedy, Come to San Diego, CA!

[@kvoncomedy]

right?!

[@Fishbowl74]

Especially with him in it

[@zeezoshah]

American muscle cars all the way

[@kathleent6150]

@@Fishbowl74 Absolutely! :p

[@hanhil3673]

I am learning a lot about middle eastern culture from these videos. It's education, I tell my Asian parents.

[@kasayat8272]

Just discovered you today and became instant fan 😍 🔥👏🤣

[@inspire2ignite848]

Sooo handsome..n funny.too💐🤣🤣🤣

[@khatiabuskivadze5890]

always interesting! Thanks

[@proudamhara6491]

Ur the best bro keep it up.

[@proudamhara6491]

kvoncomedy ur welcome bro tnx

[@kazimierzbem]

This is hilarious! You are very funny!

[@FUNSIZEDCHILD]

I’m a Persian girl and all of the things Kvon says is true!

[@kallepikku4991]

He got all the fruits except Punany.

[@paok3131999]

Oh my god,dude you re awesome, i laughed way too hard

[@iqtidarrahman2148]

Carry on tradition, his moms white haha

[@732Netto]

WHEN YOU GO PERSIAN THERE IS NO OTHER VERSION!!! :)))

[@kvoncomedy]

yes yes yes. my new book is on www.GoFundMe.com/GoPersian if u want to read some funny stories

[@732Netto]

KvonComedy do more stand up in DC and Toronto K1

[@kvoncomedy]

dc and toronto are up... www.kvon.tv see them on the schedule under shows

[@StarboyXL9]

I WUZ TURD!

[@davidford5067]

Keyvan! You are the best EVER! :-)))

[@madisontucker6661]

Lol. This super hot persian guy I work with gave me fruit almost everyday. It's like the man has fruit on him at all times. He seemed super nice. Then he tried to attack me for no reason. Then youtube started suggesting Kvon videos. I feel like my phone is spying on me lol.

[@kallepikku4991]

That's coz you didn't give any fruits back. It's a serious business: always pay your fruits back in-kind.

[@williamosle8300]

Love me some Keon!🌈💕❤️

[@aspendreams8688]

LOVE IT.

[@ELS-tone]

I really figured you were going to say that you got a ‘date’

[@robynreiser]

This is hilarious!

[@MonirehRaha]

Oh man you are hilarious 😂

[@GodRock369]

Kvon for the WIN

[@frenchtoast7742]

Omg . This is so true .

[@meejoohwang8494]

Wow this also applies to Korean girls too!! Like the non westernized Korean girls. But men I’m sorry. When you bring the girl back home safe and sound you don’t get any fruit. Maybe a little deadly stare from the parents.

[@julitaserrano5550]

Hilarious 😂

[@PatchesTanxHoney]

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ Love my favorite Persian Prince!

[@jemmaj2919]

Im shocked! She gave u fruit for dating her daughter? Would've thought she'll chase u with the fruit's knife 😆😆😆

[@huhugugu7398]

He should say "Yeah pretty good, I got my nektar-in" :D

[@onemercilessming1342]

Times have changed a bit. In the mid-20th century, when I was dating, a boy parked his car and came into the house. He did not wait outside for you, not did he honk for you to come out. He greeted your mother (and he, if smart, brought a small nosegay or some chocolates for your mama). He shook your father's hand and looked him in the eye. If papa wasn't sure of the guy, you simply didn't go. End of story. My younger sisters had it a little easier, but I, as eldest, was the paver of ways. I used to tell my parents that their entire training as parents was earned at my expense. By the way, every date I had in high school was arranged by the families. We were so interrelated with so many families that Consanguinity was an issue. Before arranging the date between the fathers, the mothers and grandmothers pored over the family trees to make sure the Roman Catholic Church wasn't going to be affronted.

[@sukainahbaitae5497]

Really like your show...so funny😄 From Thailand..

[@julitaserrano5550]

Love this guy hahahahaha

[@irenemaina6136]

Ooh lv this

[@brittbaron17]

I might have to go see him tonight at Irvine Improv! He's funny!

[@elama8592]

Brittany Baron did you go for his show??

[@shyneempress6059]

Kvon is brilliantly stupid in a good way 🤗🤭😆😂🤣comic genius

[@zariDari]

I'm offended! We love Porsche and Maserati as well :))

[@PersianShadow333]

Omg I died laughing... In due time you'll figured out how to spot the 10% of us Persian girls who are sexy, humble and have a good sense of humor 😉

[@itskunaltanwar]

That's not MuchToSayThese(Mercedes) lmfao dude you are too good

[@carmendevotta6967]

Jus found ur channel.... omg I love ur work❤ Mercedes BMW🤦‍♀️ or U...?

[@Rahul-gb6il]

Now that's a fruitful date right there😂

[@vuksgitau]

He is hilarious.

[@ericflippin5881]

I worked at a persian auto dealer with cars and trucks in the title that mostly had BMW and Mercedes cars because they knew how to get them running. The only trucks were old beaters to take the trash so he didn't have to pay for trash pickup.

[@mayracecilia7424]

Haha this is hilarious 🤣

[@wigen__]

I dated a persian girl, and she was amazing.😊

[@blasianintarlac5891]

My Persian friends are half Persian and half Korean 😘

[@MsNikita2009]

I would like to marry a Persian.. any submissions to be consider are most welcome.. mmkaay?!

[@lipsbreeze]

You're soooooo funny and cute. Could totally relate!

[@bahaar2825]

You are very very funny😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Mushroom321-]

" here's some fruit " 🤣🤣🤣

[@Nirupama108]

Just discovering you. Come to NJ!

[@alexzahrai4703]

You nailed down the Persian accent haha

[@persiansh485]

Unbelievable 😂😂😂😂

[@maryglover7600]

Haaa ♥️♥️♥️very close to my life

[@fallon7616]

Tank God she didn't give you fruit flies😂😂😂😂

[@Jet_Supreme]

I subscribed

[@justme219]

oh haha 😂

[@sorrowstriken9481]

❤

[@gigigem5631]

A fruit for $1000😂

[@eldonhoward7925]

Wow! But funny! 😂😂

[@ja6368]

What were you tinking😝

[@delaramn9916]

😂lol

[@aalm0nds]

I'm guilty since I'm middle eastern 😂

[@moubhattacharyya1141]

Boys like watermelon😂😂😂😂😂

[@mantrikashukla5737]

I wanna see the dad now, heard so much about him

[@christa3352]

I would’ve loved to see you pull up in a Charger! But I do like Mercedes too.

[@Raybets]

Could've answered "Fruitful !"

[@kylieadkins3108]

Dodge Charger 🤣🤣🤣🤣