Goons teach YOU how to be a BILLIONAIRE - GOONS #25

[@gumbo_o4284]

“The Goons Teach You How to be a Billionaire” Proceeds to talk about cat poop for the first segment.

[@jared305]

will smith

[@bodelawrie7217]

No no you are confused my friend, cat poop is the key to becoming a billionaire.

[@burrbarrybenson9290]

That’s only step one my child

[@kingofkings4917]

@@jared305 Jill gmith

[@Dildaw69]

"The Goons Teach You How To Be a Billionaire" Mcnasty talks about his dog's titties

[@SenpapiRick]

Worked at walmart for 3 years in the worse section in NJ, I have war stories from there. If you work there, you should legally become a veteran

[@taxnfax6496]

Congratulations on surviving three black fridays in NJ. Surprised you haven't gotten shanked

[@acreativeeccentric.9312]

could you tell me some stories of your service daddy senpapi rick?

[@Chiller067]

Hi RIIICK

[@justincrowell4089]

@@Chiller067 Pickle Rick?

[@Chiller067]

@@justincrowell4089 No, SENPAPI RICK

[@antoniostarch8473]

Fun Fact: In Canada, a Polar Bear could be arrested and considered a felon.

[@zackarydawson1348]

Is this for the Canadian

[@davidanthony3177]

Are the polar bear using Looney Tuney to bail out of jail or still got a like a parole job?

[@jared305]

google wikipedia on yahoo answers

[@Nick.11]

@@davidanthony3177 he'd have to spend a LOT of looney tuneys XD

[@rektmlgtvtv6884]

How do you know this fact?

[@thebullet7142]

“We are the best podcasters!” 10 minutes later: “We suck at this podcast”

[@toml5584]

Doo: "My whole family are allergic to mammals" Ahhhh so that explains the virginity

[@loganpatterson8672]

Me: *sits down to eat lunch* Me: “I think I’ll listen to the new goons episode” Goons: *talks about cat shit for the first 5 minutes*

[@LeveyHere]

Goons: The Best Podcast in all of the Taliban territory Edit: this did NOT age well.

[@xeno-xk4bd]

Egg

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

@@xeno-xk4bd eggg

[@Colbytk]

Egg

[@festivalboat9068]

@@xeno-xk4bd egg egg egg egg egg egg egg

[@gargantuanblunt]

the egg is buried at 35°38'43"N 85°45'22"W walk 15 steps SW.

[@thedenseone6443]

This is the calmest McNasty has ever been during the intro Edit: Why do you torment me so

[@xeno-xk4bd]

Egg

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

@@xeno-xk4bd eggg

[@m.4rrq297]

Egg

[@festivalboat9068]

@@xeno-xk4bd egg

[@razormarkz]

Egg

[@nikstan7860]

Doo answered SO quick when McNasty asked if he has been hit on by a gay man.

[@xtaqh]

He was excited to talk about his gay community

[@acreativeeccentric.9312]

Time stamp?

[@adachi-san3517]

@@acreativeeccentric.9312 32:29

[@acreativeeccentric.9312]

@@adachi-san3517 12 days too late…

[@razormarkz]

McNasty doing ASMR... I simultaneously do and don't want to hear that.

[@reddemon8802]

McNasty asmr vegan mukbang when

[@Nick.11]

@@reddemon8802 I've never want so badly for someone to delete their comment 'til right now, lmao

[@reddemon8802]

@@Nick.11 good

[@itsheat6553]

I like ur pfp

[@barrettrabel3257]

Soup: “I don’t own guns” Me: “that is a f*cking lie and we all know it”

[@kimjonguwu5659]

To Soup: What is your favorite prank call you’ve ever done?

[@grapeapeductape2489]

“Bello, and welcome back to binging with Babish. Today we will be making the iconic cup of shit from the Gøøns podcast.”

[@Spencerdreeeeeeeeee]

topic: what is the most embarrassing childhood or date moment

[@TcGamerP116]

They woke up

[@Sxlmate]

@@TcGamerP116 jesus christ

[@drunklilly]

19:56 omg he does that soo well I think I question his sexuality.

[@DMKelly20]

I work at Walmart as a cashier. And I can DEFINITELY confirm what Dooo said at 26:58 about the amount of theft that goes on there. We, about a year or so ago, had to get and set up locks on different displays of certain high-traffic items (cosmetic items being one major one) that could only be unlocked by a magnet key because people were either opening them up and trying them on and then putting them back and not getting them, or they were just flat-out stealing them.

[@avyayduggirala6230]

School isn’t as important as this

[@kazz4143]

I’ve been listening to this during class and don’t know what’s happening in class

[@MonkeyMode87]

Same

[@keniv4741]

Better pay attention especially if they talkin stonks 🥸

[@jamiemoonman3517]

Yep

[@Jadongdavis]

Me literally watching this in class rn

[@pizzadisciple]

Wow we actually got a podcast two weeks in a row, I'm impressed

[@15cps5]

22:10 blarg I agree with you, my parents took me to a lot of different countries and It has definitely effected me positively

[@hebabaig03]

same same I agree that being introduced to different cultures really affects you positively it helps you understand people better and where they come from but you don't have to go to different countries to understand/learn that my parents did not travel much, but they made sure I was made aware of all different races/cultures by meeting people and shit yet I get where Blarg is coming from it is a good idea to broaden that understanding

[@crispycrimson6448]

Soup: *opens up about getting assaulted* Mcnasty: "my immersion is broken"

[@ketchuppacket4437]

If you guys didn’t notice in their banner, they post every monday

[@xeno-xk4bd]

Egg

[@taylorkane2828]

They usually only post every other week as of late, so based on that pattern this is a surprise

[@wertzlegendz1497]

Thank you, i never knew if they had a schedule thank you a lot

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

@@xeno-xk4bd eggg

[@xeno-xk4bd]

@@Matthew_Rivera302 egg

[@w4hu]

“The goons teach you how to be a billionaire” Thedooo’s setup is typing:

[@MISTER_R0B0T0]

Blarg's vet story was quite possibly one of the funniest things I've ever heard

[@chaoticpuncher8756]

Not 3 minutes in and we’re back to shit. I love this podcast

[@youelbakkali-2442]

Topic: Why did McNasty go vegan instead of vegetarian?

[@juliosestiaga9752]

leaf

[@AMoistEggroll]

Kinda curious myself. My family are religious vegetarians which I'm fine with personally.

[@Phil.Anthropy]

Because vegetarians still eat animal made products just not meat and vegans eat nothing made or "stolen" from an animal.

[@thewhoakage3198]

@@Phil.Anthropy lmao he probably doesn’t feel too strongly about the animals, I think the question the other guy asked is valid still

[@Phil.Anthropy]

@@thewhoakage3198 I didn't nor would I ever try to invalidate somebody's question with an answer LOL.

[@clayton29]

I’m sitting here with a bowl of clams and they just started talking about ahit and now I’m eating my food imagining it as shit makes it taste better

[@jared305]

okay bikl

[@tawalkerb.5997]

That is really good

[@sjok1251]

A bowl of clams ?

[@poooopyyyy9459]

blarg came out firing today lmao, didn’t agree with most of what he said but i’m glad they’re this open

[@joshcameron1973]

No matter how many times I come back to this episode, the Walmart part makes me laugh my ass off

[@mrspiegsyt]

Im telling you guys, if mcnasty's dad was on the podcast, it would be the greatest podcast in the world

[@DarkDisc1]

You wouldn't be able to tell the difference...for a bit and then realise he wasn't being occasionally braindead lol

[@mrspiegsyt]

@@DarkDisc1 Exactly

[@AFallingToaster]

I love how none of them have a clue what's going on with GME, but they talk about it anyway. And get a ton of it wrong. Fun stuff.

[@davidvilla9704]

Idk if it’s just me but I see moistcritical matching this energy so hard

[@kreativeillustr8s]

That’d be an interesting podcast forsure

[@luis.j7075]

True but I feel like moist doesn’t do much dark humor, seems like he stays away from it or hates it

[@saaSTEPH8320]

Soup going into protective puppy parent mode LOL

[@matiassaucedo2739]

I clicked this and thought I clicked the wrong video cause I didn’t hear a screaming intro

[@xeno-xk4bd]

Egg

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

@@xeno-xk4bd eggg

[@festivalboat9068]

Egg

[@xeno-xk4bd]

@@festivalboat9068 egg

[@mrshark4803]

Egg

[@breaddward]

TheDoooo: "My whole family is like allergic to mammals." Me: "So... That's why he's still a virgin?..."

[@ThatUtubeGuy]

I just had a stroke reading this

[@breaddward]

@@ThatUtubeGuy If you had a stroke then Grizzy might be near too! Ha

[@jared305]

Yeah, I agree. That’s dope.

[@asgarddemasia3560]

Topic: The most depressing day, year, or month anything that goes with “this is not my day or year” in your life

[@sahilghatora3970]

21:08 Blarg I agree, I’m planning on teaching myself new languages and traveling abroad more

[@nerosensei4284]

I always laugh when soup brings us Native Americans lmao, at least they know we exist lmao

[@julianc2149]

I was listening to this on Spotify yesterday and paused it right when you guys were talking about penguins and happy feet. I put Spotify back on when I got in the car with my mom. I hooked up to Bluetooth and the first thing to play was 14:03 I then explained to her that dooo was making a joke and then quickly started playing music so it wouldn't get any more awkward.

[@tylerolson4261]

You guys should get Yumi on to talk about how he's actually good at seige

[@Itzyahbo1]

yes

[@xeno-xk4bd]

Egg

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

@@xeno-xk4bd eggg

[@festivalboat9068]

@@xeno-xk4bd egg

[@tylerolson4261]

@@festivalboat9068 E G G

[@crisscrossam]

55:22 what Blarg is talking about is called the Streisand effect. i just discovered that term yesterday but what it is is pretty much an attempt by someone to hide or remove information about something, but this only leads to people wanting to know more about what was removed.

[@yourpast9435]

Question: What was one embarrassing or cringe-worthy moment that happened in your life?

[@xeno-xk4bd]

Egg

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

@@xeno-xk4bd eggg

[@lilmoojuice1352]

EGG

[@BunniiBonBon]

This is the only podcast I keep up to date with. I don't know if I should be glad or disappointed about this.

[@wertzlegendz1497]

The two dislikes are walmart and target

[@dragonslaya5792]

i work at target can confirm

[@imfatman8192]

This brought me joy. Before the pandemic you go to Wal-Mart at 3am and it's weird, creepy and delightful.

[@bababooey3885]

topic: you are 4 inches in your mom and your dad is 4 inches in you, do you go backwards or forwards

[@supplesoup9186]

Both

[@catalyst1641]

That is so fucked 🤣 best comment

[@mazobojo]

Become the worlds first human pinball

[@pierrebrunel3155]

Bold of you to assume I got 4 inches

[@bababooey3885]

@@mazobojo yoooo that made me spit out my milk 😂

[@bafeink2]

I literally listen to very many podcasts on a daily and i won't lie when i say i get excited when i see a new Goons episode

[@Yayy12345]

Luv you guys. Thanks for this

[@bonydawk1295]

I work at Wal-Mart, there's either the bottom of the barrel sub brick humans or Instagram models, there's no in between.

[@michaelb1633]

Topic: What's one song that yall would like to play on any instrument but just haven't been able to learn

[@Dildaw69]

we need an episode of goons but its just them all playing guitar

[@nickk6968]

I always choose to eat a meal while watching this podcast, building a stomach of steel.

[@festivalboat9068]

Same here

[@gehringhoward9448]

I have don't the impossible, I have officially listened to every second of all podcasts

[@snoopycat5828]

Great episode, but I'm gonna need that tier list

[@UNKNOWN-ls5er]

When blarg started talking bout the bananas and monkeys u realize he is actually smart

[@diegopena7059]

Topic for the next podcast: Whats your version of a perfect life?

[@SsgMcGriddle]

People are finally getting the mcnasty soup rivalry they always imagine is happening for real, epic.

[@therunaway4258]

Fun fact: every Wednesday in Canada citizens are obliged to invite atleast one moose in for dinner

[@olgarzeszutek4346]

My dad had basically the same story about playing instruments as Dooo. His mom forced him to play accordion because when she was young, she was trying to learn how to play it, but didn't had musical hearing and failed. He obviously hated it (c'mon freaking accordion), but then discovered guitar, figured it out himself, started a band and sticked with music anyways.

[@JoshuaJones099]

I gotta remember to not eat while listening to this podcast

[@makotokeisatoruko8203]

Doesn't stop me, it's the nasty looking shit in doctor or surgery related shows that'll make you vomit.

[@softtacoshell2037]

I’ve been waiting for this moment

[@goldengaming5814]

Hey you should talk about the worst experience you had at a restaurant

[@crackajoneshd6174]

36:16 I wheezed like a fricking windpipe in just one moment where I exhaled in one go 😂😂

[@aukxma]

I saw blarg in a suit outfit and the stonks memes im like heh more podcast :} \

[@JCST-lk6gm]

27:46 speaking from personal experience, if it’s a chain, it’s free reign, steal from Walmart all you want, but I’d never steal from a family owned shop

[@player1one_]

TOPIC: If you guys could pick a new member for the GOONS, who are you picking and why?

[@BelovedPepper1617]

Blarg, I completely understand what you mean by let you travel, it is always so much better to instead of being trapped in one place

[@legendaryzibbo9146]

Hell yeah boah

[@dermetaller15]

The chemistry between soup and mcnasty is just fascinating. Like "God, you're so fu**ing annoying, I hate you so much! Let's hug and drink a beer together!"

[@thearcticfox8231]

Jschlatt would be great on the podcast.

[@richlocalworker3092]

Dude I would love to see Schlatt on the Goons podcast! Hell yeah!

[@thearcticfox8231]

@@KdubbleYT What??? Jschlatt is a devoted Catholic, he wouldn't do that!

[@alexcrain4]

@@KdubbleYT yea it sucks but they are a corporation so they had to they had no choice

[@icenation6730]

And swags “the goons and the misfits podcast

[@Mike-xj9kl]

this is the 25th time ive said "im never eating while watching the goons again"

[@DDTRAINER]

"You can't give a felony out to a gorilla" *insert Harambe memes* 🤣

[@Dorlax1734]

Was at a Mcdonald’s drive thru listening to the podcast and the cashier hears it she says. That is some of the most authentic parenting advice you can hear. (Letting your kids choose what they want). She goes i applaud you for listening to a inspirational podcast. Me: Laughing inside 😂 Thanks yeah they are the best 👌

[@jackpearl9306]

Topic Most illegal thing you’ve done well sober

[@Jake-yo2ey]

I’ve been waiting all day. Let’s go! Now all I need is goons gaming

[@DarkDisc1]

I've been checking regularly lol

[@Jake-yo2ey]

@@DarkDisc1 it’s the highlight of my week

[@sofiaxaguilera]

Q : if u were in a zombie apocalypse who would die first ? also jschlatt next guest?? (:

[@fictionvstheuniverse5418]

i love how blarg has to make an analogy about monkeys to get everyone to understand the situation

[@Matthew_Rivera302]

man why y’all gotta post when i’m in school 😫😫😫

[@Natd0gsef]

Fuck it listen to it anyway

[@sotirisgounaris9635]

gotta love how many times they talk about the same story, honestly it is part of the charm!

[@pedroinacio4417]

Topic: What is the weirdest dream you guys had?

[@SaucySkater]

best intro yet

[@ohsodarkskin]

I can't wait for the black history jokes

[@Natd0gsef]

Oh no ohh noooo

[@shawnybawny2927]

was waiting for this today

[@muuriomaker544]

Women, am I right?

[@TheADTRFAN95]

As someone who worked security at walmart and apprehended shoplifters, it really does make you want to end it all

[@nathanmeredith]

I've never replayed a part of a video so many times

[@jeffsyndrome4812]

Hearing their rant about Walmart and robbery really paints the picture as to how middle class these boyos are XD. Still love them tho.

[@davidpalos5232]

This is probably the best episode ever

[@danielcruz8868]

Finally new podcast

[@badmodernart5945]

This is the best podcast ever. I watched it while working out and nearly fucking died on the treadmill cuz of how much i was laughing

[@iluxio4968]

I'm moving out this week and you guys just blessed this week by uploading, I know it's gonna go well ❤️️

[@cleepusmaximus4238]

22:10 yeah i agree thats dope. gotchu blarg

[@stormtrooperjay5143]

Bro i love this podcast

[@Xenokiin]

It feels like every time I listen to another podcast, I just gain more respect for Matt.

[@charlesxavier870]

yeah I agree that's dope. you're welcome blarg

[@CosmicSteph]

The last minute has to be my favorite outro for the podcast so far 😂

[@shruthimaniyodath7755]

I save up the podcast for a day I feel like shit. Today was that day. And I said, WAS. ✌🏻✨ Also, thanks for letting us laugh at your expense. It takes an open mind, a lot of tolerance, and loads of patience to be able to do that. 😌 And yeah, just so you know, I don't agree with every opinion that's shared on here, like saying it's ok to steal from one person but not the other. Stealing is still stealing =NG 😅 But whatever, I'm glad you guys are doing this. Super thankful. Stay safe🙌🏼

[@mlb6268]

The goons actually talking about stocks? And making it enjoyable to listen to? Never thought I’d see the day lmao

[@evanbushman7779]

I work as a veterinary technician at an animal hospital, and if you don’t want your pet to get fingered, bring a stool sample of your pet from home

[@CosmicSteph]

McNasty’s lil monologue at 42:46 has been me for the past 4 years 💀😆