Great Things To Say To Your Wife While She's On Her Period

Ever wonder what to say to your wife during high tide? Wonder no more. Here are a few surefire ways to maintain the peace when she’s surfing the crimson wave, if you know what I mean. And what I mean is she’s on her period.
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[@richardbrumbaugh6481]

And if you are a liberal man, you can tell her, I know exactly what you are going through, I had my period last week.

[@lmlmlmlm7627]

😂😂😂

[@Samma723]

😆

[@theLadyjensen]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@RedYankee45]

This comment deserves at least a heart lol

[@HelloKitty-jz5gm]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@ChannelName-fm2pt]

Just tell her to calm down. She will realize she is being overcome by hormones and isn't being rational. Works every time. Nothing bad will happen, trust me.

[@minakatahizuru]

LOL telling woman to call down xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[@negativeindustrial]

That actually works on mine. I often feel like Captain Kirk and I’m married to a female Spock, though.

[@mikesmovingimages]

Divorced? Never married?

[@Golfnut_2099]

And you are lucky to be alive...

[@1968CudaGuy]

Don't ever, ever leave the shovel out where she can reach it.....

[@millenialfalcon8243]

As a married father of 6 daughters, I approve this message... 😁

[@Rosie_C]

Oh dear! I know a family with 6 girls… it’s something else. I think my entire family is thankful that my parents ended up with 6 boys.

[@earlsmith7428]

Millenialfalcon, Sir, you done and gone more than what is necessary in life. Go in peace.

[@user-ok7ky6ry2r]

7 women in the house? Do you need prayer? Let us know! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@erikawoods8975]

Wow, I grew up with 3 brothers and it all went great. My mom had six sisters, it was a nut house at my grandma’s 😅

[@0doubledseven589]

You need Hazardous Duty pay. 🤣

[@whiskeymonk4085]

"Relax. It's not THAT bad." Always works for me.

[@1893unknownuser]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@69BTony]

I like "at least you're not a guy, we go through way worse stuff."

[@navret1707]

Whiskey - I take it you say this via long distance or text message? Otherwise, I would have to assume you were saying this from your grave.

[@rross27]

@@navret1707 Yea... I think, "Relax it's not that bad" is what Lorena Bobbitt said to her husband right after she chopped his pecker off!

[@mikesmovingimages]

@@navret1707 The second time he said it was from the grave. First time he was standing right next to her.

[@SamlSchulze1104]

Best thing I've said to my wife. "I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I have some chocolate for you. "

[@marysterling691]

Sam, you're a good husband; your wife is blessed to have you.

[@blowba]

That might work too.

[@sweetiespoon5150]

Dark chocolate is best. Lindt 100% cacao is the best. Just saying...

[@gigim.9742]

​@@sweetiespoon5150Can vouch! Never settle for less than 80% cacao.

[@HelloKitty-jz5gm]

You’re a great husband. My husband gets me my favorite ice cream, Pamprin, and chocolate. He’s wonderful. 🥹❤️

[@JasontheLayman]

My favorite is, "Are you always this angry on the inside, or just when you're on the rag?" It's important to be sensitive like this.

[@Rosie_C]

I heard a doctor who specializes in that say that a woman actually goes through 4 phases in a month so it’s like being married to 4 different women… 😂 (But it’s true.)

[@rross27]

@@Rosie_C Hmmm... Maybe thats why men vanish into the garage to "work on the car" for 1 week... Golf the next week... Hang out at the sports bar the week after that... And then go to the casino...?

[@Azurethewolf168]

@@rross27or they suddenly start drinking more

[@furonbrainiac6634]

Nice knowing you.

[@transparentglazier]

@@Rosie_C Are harems legal?

[@sdgathman]

A woman at a customer site would put up a sign on her desk: "I have PMS and I have a gun." Was very effective in reducing needless interaction.

[@oconnke1]

Did you tell her that PMS stands for "Poor Me Syndrome"?

[@catherinebracy4332]

Bad. ASS.

[@BrazilianBikini38]

Saw a female airforce pilot tee-shirt once. said "I have PMS, I am retaining water, and I have an F-22!"

[@mayowankenobi]

@@BrazilianBikini38Too bad the back of the t-shirt didn't say "I wouldn't intercept my, at least not this week!"

[@TsukiNaito1]

I need that.

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

How about “yes honey, i know you’re feeling out of control but I’m still the man and listening to me is the moral and virtuous thing to do.”

[@justbe4481]

Nope tried it didn't go very well.

[@1893unknownuser]

Just go to the Bar and let her cry that bloody shit out... Nah... I'm just kidding... that's what we really want to do, but we can't... 😂

[@maryknight4109]

Wonder what witticism would be put on the gravestone?

[@godofplumbing]

Haha

[@yooperlooper]

I think you should try it and see what happens . . . .

[@treyhelms5282]

Pull a Joe Biden. Tell her how you lost family and your son died in Iraq even thought he didn't. That appeals to people. 81 million votes can't be wrong!

[@maryknight4109]

That's right!!

[@ChannelName-fm2pt]

There's something here. Maybe tell her she can complain when she can beat you in a push up contest.

[@69BTony]

Also let her know that you are also black and that you wrote Mr. King's "I have a dream" speech for him.

[@ericpl7227]

@@69BTony while driving an 18 wheeler!

[@Azurethewolf168]

@@69BTonyalso, when your asked to do something, act like you don’t what’s going on and bump into walls until you figure it out!

[@KalEl1994]

A moment of silence for the men who actually tried these tips with their wives

[@aubreysummers1729]

🫡

[@fuckfacer]

Retard moment

[@chuckgoodman3828]

Because they know that it doesn’t matter what they say to their wives, it’ll be a bloodbath!

[@Greg-xp5ti]

That's a scream

[@pancaked1252]

@@chuckgoodman3828😂

[@MDyson151]

As a woman (the old fashioned kind with lactating breasts and a yoohoo I was born with) this is hilarious. Can't wait to show my husband this.

[@rross27]

I find that a box of Godiva preimum dark chocolates, a fresh rose and some light belly massage for my lady do wonders...

[@69BTony]

Your husband has been blessed with a woman with an amazing sense of humor!

[@xgtwb6473]

A yoo-hoo damn haha this is someone's mudda

[@paulis7319]

Now we can get YooHoo's from vending machines for a dollar...which is a shame, cause I used to get them for 50 cents.

[@MDyson151]

@@69BTony yeah, you've gotta be able to laugh at yourself. Im Dutch by birth and one of the funniest things I've ever seen is (Austin Powers) Mike Meyers playing a Dutch villain. I find recognising my behaviour and warning him beforehand takes away a lot of the stress. My husband is far more willing to be patient and supportive as long as I don't expect him to take it all on the chin. I know its not the woman's fault for feeling like that during her period, but its not her partner's either.

[@HelloKitty-jz5gm]

As a sane, non-liberal WOMAN, I found this to be hilarious. I lost it when “period” was whispered. 😂😂😂 Bee, you guys are truly a blessing. Thank you for the laughs. 😂

[@user-wj1qm6sx1c]

When you said “sane”, non-liberal was understood.

[@MankindFails]

@@user-wj1qm6sx1c Yes I think it is called tautology when you repeat the same word twice.

[@sdfft820]

A sane non liberal woman? Really? Hey, that’s so rare it’s like discovering a living thing we all thought was extinct! Live long and prosper.

[@bandgeekforlife406]

When I was a kid my mom used to put up a picture of a cranky lady on the fridge during that time of the month, so even when we kids were too young to know what that was, we knew that Mom wasn't in a good mood and we should be quiet and gentle.

[@esm1817]

I love this idea.

[@LimegreenSnowstorm]

Oh that’s genius 😮

[@godandsarah1306]

That's so cute

[@katiesoderling3596]

Great idea!

[@kaiseryuuki4098]

"Don't worry, I bought a garlic necklace to keep the vampires away." Wait for her to respond. If she thinks you're serious, go ahead and say you're joking. If she implies in any way that you're joking, pull out an actual garlic necklace.

[@omnitroph1501]

"never let them know your next move"

[@Jazz_Matazzfr]

Shrodinger's Douchebag lmao

[@Etymon-jt3zw]

What did the lesbian vampire say to Her girlfriend ? see you next month 🩸🍷

[@chaoticallyorganizedd]

​@@Etymon-jt3zwthat was both funny and disgusting lol 🤢

[@Bryan-ip1gf]

​@@Etymon-jt3zw😮

[@bricktasticanimations4834]

The last one with the food, blankets and television actually wasn't that bad.

[@PatriotSFV1]

And a RX for Xanax to top it all off.

[@nickswildweather1308]

That's what I thought

[@ChannelName-fm2pt]

Electric heating pad.

[@RipleysSanatorium]

Right!?! I'll take tacos😅

[@EstherMalone1701]

Did you hear what he put on the television? Also, I think he should serve me hand and foot rather than disappearing on me.

[@troygreen8959]

A friend once told me he was going by the store to get some ice cream and something salty. He said, "To make everyone feel better." I didn't know if I was more impressed with the brilliant intervention or his situational awareness because I have never once realized on my own what was going down. Michael, you are a legend.

[@ThEsiLhOuEtT3]

Genius.

[@dianaboggs2346]

As a woman who almost went home a couple of times from work because of this, the guy that bled while brushing his teeth totally gets it 😊

[@MankindFails]

As a man I'd compare it to nose bleeding. That is so annoying.

[@SaraSaraBoBara1]

My teen bleeds heavy and full on barfs sometimes. It’s different when you’re young, I had issues like that too. It makes me angry when I see trans people talk about their period pains (which I’ve been seeing a lot of lately), like dude, you’ve never bled through your pants or projectile vomited from period pain.

[@MankindFails]

@@SaraSaraBoBara1 What I find horrible about it is that women can have health issues that will cause or increase bleeding. So how can you know what is normal and what is not...

[@SaraSaraBoBara1]

@@MankindFails I’ve had a couple friends with endometriosis, which sounds horrible and requires having a uterus to have. I’ve known 2 women who were anemic and needed medication to bleed less because they didn’t have the iron to spare. If a person isn’t bleeding, they aren’t having a period. Period. It’s fairly normal for a girl to have bad pain until they’re about 14-15, the neurological and hormonal changes take time to even out. And it takes practice to get good about using pads and tampons or cups, etc. correctly.

[@MankindFails]

@@SaraSaraBoBara1 I have a cousin that was having health issue, she needed an operation so it was pretty serious. She found out because she was bleeding a lot more than usual even though it wasn't related. I also have a parent that had headaches all her adult life and doctors couldn't find anything. It stopped with menopause.

[@Cindybin46user-nu4hg2dx6u]

I'm a grandmother and past this stage of life. Now I'm just always cranky.

[@devindaniels1379]

"Men get periods now too and you don't see me complaining about it."

[@UrAdored]

Buddy what 💀

[@bertram-raven]

@@UrAdored Forgive him; he drinks Bud Lite. (Which I think is against the forgotten eleventh commandment.)

[@UrAdored]

@@bertram-raven y’all have to be trolling rn there is no way-💀

[@pamelalandon2423]

The Dylan cans were bad enough, then I saw they had sponsered Pride Parades for several years. I won't buy them again. I buy at a local Brewery.

[@waldoparsnip1025]

Ha ! 'Like your wit , but I don't ! I got knocked up three months ago .Butt hole baby ..

[@sussudioharvey9458]

When I was young ( in the 70’s) I went to see a doctor because my cramp pain was so bad and needed something to help with the pain. He responded that it was “ all in my head”. Well you know those reflex hammers that they keep around? I forcefully hit him on the forehead with one and he yelled at the pain! So I told him “ what? that didn’t hurt … it’s all in your head! “ And walked out. I’m sure he had his first lesson with dealing with a woman with PMS.

[@tessmoore3762]

🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@scubasteve3032]

Good for you! I hate it when doctors say that!

[@11AriseAndShine11]

🤣🤣🤣❤

[@1893unknownuser]

Nah... still on your head... you might be just another crazy Karen... xD

[@Joni-lq3rf]

So was the hammer maybe actually IN his head? Might have been the case, because you seem to have been very angry. 😜

[@kalevthewalrus44]

“Calm down, don’t be dramatic.” Is one that will definitely protect you from being destroyed.

[@navret1707]

Using any of these lines is the equivalent of saying “You can skydive without a parachute. . . Once.”

[@randytaylor6922]

You can skydive without a parachute...just one time

[@andymanaus1077]

Just invite all her female friends over. Before too long they will synchronise and you can organise a monthly fishing trip with their boyfriends and husbands, while the ladies spend their "special time" together.

[@Joni-lq3rf]

Hahaha love it and I strongly believe it's true! Doctors say otherwise but really!!!, when I spend a longer time very close with my sister or friends (or we even lived together in the past) we really had that bloody time together 😅😜

[@pamelalandon2423]

That is true.

[@waldoparsnip1025]

Ha ! Or , take them along and have them ' chum " the water .

[@michelem7986]

Ice cream, heating pad, quiet time, massage, help with children/errands/housework, courtesy, kindness, and space without disappearing.

[@Mohawk_Productions]

Sorry can’t do that, I work graveyard shifts, so I have to go to bed at noon or 2 pm and have to sleep 8 hours so no go on that

[@FlyingMalamute]

Judas priest. When did women turn into such sissies? The last thing I wanted was having people know I was having a period.

[@AtarahDerek]

Fun fact: In Romani culture, a woman gets a week off from cooking and chores when she's on her period. She can cook for herself if she wants, but her husband has to take over the cooking and cleaning duties for everyone else in the household.

[@catherinebracy4332]

That's awesome. In Japan working women are allowed one to two days off a month.

[@Azurethewolf168]

@@catherinebracy4332I wonder why America doesn’t do that. For being so “progressive”, you’d think women would be allowed more days off due to having to bear children or etc.

[@bertram-raven]

So it was now his turn to order around the house slave? 😇

[@AtarahDerek]

@@bertram-raven The Roma have never been too fond of slavery, considering they were victims of it when they first arrived in Europe.

[@goldabernstein1215]

@@Azurethewolf168 In the US, we'd have to start giving everyone days off for periods because everyone could have a period or identify as having a period. I'm a physician and I get so irritated at the term "menstruating person" instead of woman. It makes me queasy. We should not be categorized by a biological function. Do we call men "potential prostate cancer patients"?

[@rphb5870]

I followed the advice and said all of this to my wife. She was happy about it, and even cooked me my favourite meal, despite her herself not being hungry and only eating an apple. She sure is great. As a sidenote I am writing this from the doctors office, I got a terrible stomach ache doing the night, I wonder what caused it.

[@dave8168]

Arsenic and antifreeze will do that to you.

[@rphb5870]

@@dave8168 hm, I don't know anything about that, I have to ask my wife, she's a chemist

[@Joni-lq3rf]

Hahahaha I can't 😅😅😅😅

[@jillmondt5398]

🤣

[@survivingbehindliberallines]

HAAA HAAA HAAA!!!!!

[@TheMrsWatcher]

Do what my hubby does: Yell "Fire in the hole!", Throw chocolate at me and dive behind the couch.

[@sarahvegangarden4822]

❤👍😊

[@Brievel]

That would honestly make me laugh. XD

[@srsusansummers3070]

Hilarious

[@TheMrsWatcher]

Works Every Time 😆

[@marthacallahan4365]

Love it!😂

[@oconnke1]

This actually happened to me... Wife says, "I'm not in menopause. It's called perimenopause. I'll let you know when I'm in menopause." It's been over 20 years since that happened and she still hasn't told me that she's reached menopause. And by the way, don't call it mental pause. Totally bad idea. Just saying...

[@tessmoore3762]

🤣😂🤣 Perimenopause really can last a number of years for some women, but 20 is a bit extreme.

[@carlye.3093]

Lol

[@Joni-lq3rf]

😅😅😅😅😅😅mental pause 😅😅😅

[@halfstep67]

I told my wife, there is the "pre-week", "week" and "post-week". At least there is one "good-week" out of the month.

[@lisalavadores1566]

I had a boss who had me alert him to my period - he would then stay away from me for 5 days. It was heaven! Of course, he’d be sued today, but I loved it.

[@justforever96]

So you're basically sick and working at half productivity and off limits up be given any instructions or projects a quarter of the working days of every month? I wonder why women get paid less and hired less than men, weird.

[@lisalavadores1566]

@@justforever96 Wow, you sure made a lot of assumptions. I was a poker floorman, and I only needed the boss if there was an objection to one of my rulings - which rarely happened because I was an excellent floorman. He basically just stayed away from micromanaging and useless chit chat. However, I happen to agree with you that the so-called gender pay gap is not a product of discrimination.

[@palaceofwisdom9448]

Growing up, firmly telling my sisters to "take a pill" when applicable was my helpful way of responding to their unwarranted hostility. My mom went through menopause while I still lived at home, and I minimized her stress by hiding in the basement. Parents, if you ever want your son to have a family of his own, don't let him grow up in an estrogen run nuthouse.

[@darraghtormey1500]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I feel your pain 😂😂😂😂

[@theLadyjensen]

Lmao, you hid in the basement 😂😂 that’s so funny. Idk what woman are like in menopause (haven’t seen it) but if it’s anything like a period or pregnancy- not looking forward to those hormones

[@earlsmith7428]

Palaceofwisdom, you are truly wide. Hiding in the basement is/was the best thing you could have done. Always impart this wisdom to other individuals of the male persuasion.

[@palaceofwisdom9448]

@@theLadyjensen Menopause is like a period five times as strong as normal that goes on for several years straight.

[@tessmoore3762]

My son had 3 older sisters. I started menopause before he graduated high school - he was the youngest. He now has a wife and 2 daughters. He's a great dad and husband. Lol, but I had an easy time of it, and I told his sisters that their hormone issues were not other people's fault and that they still had to be nice, and not take it out on those around them even if they didn't feel great.

[@Gary-ib8dz]

If she starts to act hysterical, just remind her that the word hysterical comes from a Greek root word for womb. So essentially hysterical just means acting like a woman. I think women like little bits of information like that.

[@russianinvader3207]

Yep.

[@donlitt]

Genius comment

[@hatchhermit77]

And with lunatic, being based on the moon, only a step away, we have two ways to say it!

[@AeroGuy07]

I said some of these things to my wife. You have no idea how hard it is to type with your tongue from a hospital bed!

[@VroodenTheGreat]

I always liked "Everything is an argument with you, isn't it?" That one usually stops her in her tracks.

[@jackoszuscik6669]

THE BEAST THAT BLEEDS FOR 7 DAYS AND DOESN'T DIE 🌹❤

[@Rebecca_Violet]

This sounds like a metal song I want to listen to.

[@stevemcgarrett303]

I always said "you have been going through this since you were 12. You should be able to handle this better by now don't you think."

[@bunny_0288]

My reply would be how would you handle being kicked in the nuts every day for a week each month. Would having that terrible experience repeated every month really make it any easier to deal with?

[@stevemcgarrett303]

@@bunny_0288 I got that response a time or two. And many others. She's long past that curse, and the curse that comes after. She can definitely hold her own, trust me. We've been married 4 decades.

[@Quekksilber]

​@@bunny_0288But you don't understand... Being kicked in the nuts really really hurts! You can't compare that!

[@bunny_0288]

@@Quekksilber And you don't think period cramps really really hurt? Mine have been so bad I've thrown up from the pain. I can't sleep with them. I will lay in the fetal position all night with a heating pad. The pain feels like you're being stabbed in the stomach and then it radiates around to this awful tightness in your back. Because the same hormone telling your uterus to contract can also contract those lower back muscles. And when it's really bad the pain can also shoot down my legs. Oh and it screws up your digestion too. So sometimes you can have diarrhea or constipation which just adds to the misery. Sometimes my period will also trigger a migraine. And if you watch the period pain simulator videos, the guys that try them are doubled over in pain well before it gets to the really bad levels. And they are only experiencing a fraction of what it's like because they can't simulate the hormonal changes going on or the other things that go along with a period.

[@Quekksilber]

@@bunny_0288 I was trying to be sarcastic. I'm sorry if you got upset thinking that I wasn't. That sounds seriously unpleasant. I'm sorry it's that bad for you, and thank you for telling me about it.

[@sirmitch495]

He's talking about a next month. If you say the things he just said to say you probably won't be around for next month.😅

[@RandomNY1234]

Should have added. " Hey it's 2024 and men can get periods also.. " LOL

[@stvargas69]

Just tell her she's being irrational. Logically she will see her error and apologize

[@endrankluvsda4loko172]

This all sounds like great advice! Although surprisingly homicides have gone up 1000% across the country after this video came out.

[@jongreen9171]

How about "you have had them since you were a teenager. Haven't you figured out a way to deal with them by now?"

[@bunny_0288]

How about we test your theory. Every month for an entire week we will send someone to kick you in the balls each day. Do you think repeating that awful experience each month will really help you deal with it any better?

[@Raelyn976]

🤣🤣🤣

[@Nostradevus1]

Best thing to say is "See you in a week"

[@1893unknownuser]

You, dude... you... 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@Tankeryanker339]

Indeed ! Time to go hunting or fishing

[@theuglybiker]

I have a fancy watch with a moon phase just so I can keep track of 'those days'. It's saved my butt more than once.

[@whiskeymonk4085]

I secretly keep an analog moon chart in my truck and keep track so I can conveniently go on a camping trip or plan work out of town.

[@bunny_0288]

You're lucky your wife is regular so it's easy to track. My cycle is all over the place so my poor husband can never plan ahead 😂

[@elyssabarajas3554]

I told my husband to download my period tracker so he can prepare, but he said he doesn't need it. He's right, even when we were dating he knew it was coming before I had a chance to tell him, not sure when he memorized my cycle but I'm appreciative anyway

[@pamelalandon2423]

That is why God only wants you to have one wife.

[@whiskeymonk4085]

@@pamelalandon2423 Can we get God on the phone to corroborate that? I'd settle for a text lol.

[@Gr3nadgr3gory]

My mother taught me that one of the best things you can say to a woman on her period is plain and simply; "I brought you chocolate."

[@elisekuby2009]

A pint of her fave ice cream works wonders too! Just sayin'....

[@ladybug591]

Gosh - I have been missing out all these years when I could have been having chocolate brought to me by my husband - I never had any problems with periods, pregnancy and menopause - now I realize that many women are far smarter(?) than I am....lol.

[@boxelder9167]

I just open the door, throw the chocolate in, shut the door and run back to my vehicle that’s still running and filled with enough fishing gear to last for 8 days.

[@jefft8597]

Tell her to make sure that she always washes her hands. They really like that reminder.

[@edwardgabel3701]

I used to be married. Nothing works. Wear body armor, a cup and a hockey face mask. Now you’re good to go.

[@niteowl1914]

Reminding her that women in the olden days didn't have good pain medicine like we do today would really help her to contextualize her suffering and fix her attitude.

[@scubasteve3032]

😂😂😂 Nice! I’ll have to try that one!

[@love2scoobysnack]

most women didn't actually have very many periods in the olden days compared to today. Mostly because they spend nearly their entire adult life pregnant and then died young before they even reached menopause. Life expectancy before penicillin was only about 40. That is 10 children in about 25 years plus poor nutrition slowed them down too.

[@Quekksilber]

​@@love2scoobysnackI have a picture of my German Great-great-grandmother from a 1914 postcard showing her with her 9th and 12th child. She looks a bit tired, but overall very healthy and well-composed. On there she writes how she wishes this "horrible war" is going to end soon.

[@AA-gu4mw]

It’s unlikely they even needed medication. All these symptoms come from a diet low in fats and high in sugars. Most women women these days under eat healthy fats and overeat unhealthy carbs. Recipe for hormonal imbalance and pms symptoms.

[@pamelalandon2423]

Pads started being used during WW1 when Nurses discovered the wound packing packages worked better than rags.

[@robertpesche]

"If we keep you barefoot and pregnant, you won't have to deal with this 'period' stuff."

[@APP-hm6bf]

I can honestly tell you, that hearing, 'we have a bleeder' will make me laugh through the misery 😂

[@jackucthatjack5896]

I like to remind her when she's getting emotional or agitated about trivial little things that she's only feeling that way because she's on her period. And when she insist her feelings are still valid I'm quick to remind her that again, u only feel that way because u are on your period. Just being helpful 😊

[@HelloKitty-jz5gm]

🔪 😂

[@11AriseAndShine11]

I'd smack my husband into the middle of next week if he said that to me! 😂

[@furonbrainiac6634]

I hope your shovels are well hidden.

[@cashwalk7253]

“Tonight on Dateline-“

[@HelloKitty-jz5gm]

@@cashwalk7253 😂😂😂

[@hrbeta]

I had her days marked in the calendar, but I could always tell with 100% accuracy just a few days before her monstrouation.

[@scottn7cy]

Never mess with any animal that bleeds for five days and lives.

[@bunny_0288]

What about those of us who bleed for 7???

[@scottn7cy]

@@bunny_0288 The horror, the horror. Truly terrifying to think such a creature exists. :)

[@Brievel]

🙋🏼‍♀️ 9

[@DavidGraskemper]

That "Cleaning the house" bit is gold!!

[@petya7105]

for anyone wondering, the bit from leviticus is: "also thou shalt not approach unto a woman to uncover her nakedness, as long as she is put apart for her uncleanness."

[@sebkarlsson]

Today my wife's period started and we happily reminisced about another period where she kept hitting her head on kitchen cabinets and I gave her the helpful, but serious, advice to be really careful crossing the road on her shopping trip, since she was, you know, mentally compromised.

[@DoctorQuackenbush]

Just be sure to be dressed in what you wish to be buried in. 😆

[@charityputnam50]

As an older woman who used to have a hard time with periods, I felt both anger and mirth at the same time while watching this.

[@jimdavis1566]

Wtf is mirth

[@willswift94]

Something you feel while you're on your period

[@love2scoobysnack]

@@jimdavis1566 I think it is one of the gifts the wise men gave Jesus ;D

[@annieclark9772]

forget them "boys" they're just amused and sad they can't fix womens problems for women. i feel for your pain as someone who grew up without any pain meds for my periods when i was younger. instead of advil (or whatever) i would vomit and lie down for an hour every other month.

[@charityputnam50]

@@jimdavis1566 It means I was amused.

[@nickmedley4749]

I used to work at a company whose acronym was PMS. I was one of like 2 male employees. It was extremely hard not to make jokes with the other guy 😂

[@seannordeen5019]

This fall, I passed through a small town in New Mexico that had a clinic named PMS. I told my companion it was really nice they had a place that specialized in women's health issues. Then I saw the smaller text on the sign that said Presbyterian Medical Services and went oops.

[@nickmedley4749]

@@seannordeen5019 That’s my old company!! I’m from Albuquerque 😎

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

How about “your hormones being out of whack isn’t an excuse to abuse me and the kids.” Is that a good one?

[@maryknight4109]

Only if you want to see the sun tomorrow...

[@1893unknownuser]

If you had the period for years you should be used to deal with it, tbh... Or is just another excuse to go hard with "cheap soap opera drama queen" mode... 😂

[@navret1707]

Once.

[@bunny_0288]

​@@1893unknownuser So if every month someone kicked you in the balls every day for a week how would you deal with being told you should be used to it by now?

[@dudebro9091]

Lol, I agree. As a woman, trying to trivialize belittling and berating your family members just because you're on your period is completely unacceptable. Each family member should treat each other with kindness no matter what.

[@ozzieman4392]

How about “ Democratic men have periods too!”?

[@victorrene3852]

When I first got married I said "What's wrong with you this time?" It worked 👍🏻

[@michaelmappin4425]

No matter what time of the month it is, if she's mad, you should ask if it's that time of month.

[@Womb_to_Tomb_Apologetics]

When I get one of these "wives" I will make sure to use these! 🤓

[@superstarcat7654]

Actually having hubby give me a heating pad , blanket, tell me to put my feet up and he'll cook dinner and see to the kids homework, is the best way to get thru this part of womanhood.

[@pinkroses135]

🥰

[@rebeccahaglund3736]

I'll fight you for him!

[@geekley]

lol I read the comment fast and thought you wrote head pat instead of heating pad

[@markgadsby5568]

Problem is that too many women expect this of their husbands all the time …

[@wowzersfyi]

@@markgadsby5568 all the time? buddy if she is doing that 25 days of a month and her so called husband thinks doing the same shi for ''5 days'' is way to much, that man aint worth it. I'd still understand if it was a traditional house with just the man working so hes tired, understandable but in this economy men follow their traditional roles and women follow women's AS WELL AS men's traditional roles bc survival isnt possible without that unless the man has a high paying job and most of the times he doesnt. Women cook, do the household work and earn, the man just earns. Either do all the earning like a traditional household, no matter how many jobs you need to take for good life bc she is doing her end of the stick; household just fine or do 50-50 with both earning and both contributing to the household. My mother divorced my incompetent of a father bc at some point people have had enough, she worked from 10 to 4, did several emergency operations which sometimes lasted for 10-12 hours which led her to come home late several times and when she did come home, she cooked, did all the household work like the little slave she was, my father worked 10 to 5 and was too 'tired' and when mum had longer operations to perform he'd still wait till she came home and cooked us dinner just bc he had a dick and everything had to be served on a silver platter to him by his little wife/slave the religious book oh so promote and this, this, despite both jobs not being labour jobs and hers being more hectic than his. My mother was a doctor, my father was a dentist and in all this IN ALL THIS she did everything she could and expected him to help her when she couldnt help herself as she had very painful cramps, me and my brother as little kids could see the pain she was in and helped her as much as we could as little kids but the grown man with enough free time on his hand coudnt? This is story of milions of women out there, do your gender roles bc its your duty, do the man's gender roles to survive but the man woundnt do his gender roles well, maybe take tow jobs as you clearly expect her to stick to her gender roles? The rules don't apply for men, they just apply for the puny little women. And women expect too much? Buddy you want your wife to do the household work, raise the kids as well as contribute financially while you just contribute financially and no more. Goddamn the day women started realising marriage is nothing but hell for women and heaven for men, with statistics proving us that again and again from time to time, it's gonna be over for you entitled manwhores out there.

[@dailytheology1689]

My wife was honored for me to suggest and play this for her.😊

[@Makaneek5060]

If she isn't 100% ready to receive both acts of kindness and dumb one-liners throughout the whole month, she ain't the one.

[@reyvynnightveil1706]

"I know you're feeling emotional right now, but think about how i feel when you act like this around me." Works every time.

[@Raelyn976]

🤣🤣🤣

[@crystalthompson507]

Lol. More like a peace offering in the form of chocolate will keep you from ending up in pieces. Period.

[@Silver-cl2bd]

As a woman, I only have to give the death stare to my husband. He doesn't have to say a word. He really knows and understands me at the deepest level. 😂

[@jonajones7044]

C'mon! You knew my wife was on it, and then you posted this!! I'm taking notes! 🖋️ 📜

[@trincherowineguy]

Me too!

[@1893unknownuser]

I would say to her : - I listened a song that reminded me about you, honey... and the song is... 🗣RAINING BLOOD by SLAYER!!! 🤟🏻 🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸 🎸⚡️Tan Tan Tan!!! tananana nanana nanana!!! Tan Tan Tan!!!

[@cabdriver4103]

At least or perhaps to your best interest, you didn't do the Leviticus. You have to make your wife sleep outdoors.. Not kidding

[@cabdriver4103]

It's like letting the dog in after a cold night, they appreciate you. But they don't trust, suggest locking the dog doors, wish the best perhaps good quilts

[@bricktasticanimations4834]

The last one with the food, blankets and television actually wasn't that bad.

[@foobloo101]

My wife found this hilarious. She said "if you ever say any of these things to me, I will hit you". I call that a win :)

[@TJDeez]

I told my wife I wouldn't talk to her about the subject until she started "acting like an adult". She immediately realized her immature ways and said thank you. Life is so easy during that time!

[@evansjessicae]

🤣

[@srsusansummers3070]

Surprised your still alive😂

[@eprofessio]

Mine cleans the house like a maniac and shouts at everyone who wears shoes or did not clean as much as her maniac self. My three year old daughter and I love it.

[@williamcraig6377]

Greg Abbott sent out a press conference today informing border cities that alligators will be released in mass to the Rio Grande River. "We are here to protect animal rights and provide them with sanctuary land."

[@richardstrand2130]

I wish that was true.

[@RebekahNicole]

My dad is the only man in a house with four ladies. My mom, my sister, and I are pretty much synchronized now so he’s gotta deal with all three of us at one time. It’ll be real bad when the little one gets grown lol. 😂

[@igorlopes7589]

Well, its better to just deal with it at once then have to deal with periods 24/7

[@diananeuman6222]

During menopause I got a bit crazy...but we have very good communication...so I told my husband "you should step away right now, because I'm fantasizing about whacking your head with this cast iron pan." I would never DO it! But if he was farther away the temptation was gone. Why do men think it's gunny when we're angry? He has ZERO fear... which is kind of nice. Thankfully, that's over!

[@michaelcarter3149]

My all time favorite is waiting until they get really mad, then laughing. Completely takes their mind off what they were mad about. Guarantee to work every single time!

[@classic.cameras]

Chat GPT is a genius. Best Husband EVER!!!

[@powerofme7144]

Just tell her you identify as a woman and "I'm here for you girlfrand!"

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

Oh, how about “and people say they want a female president…”

[@zakkT91]

A female president would be nuking a new country every month

[@1893unknownuser]

"She has her hands soaked with blood" about a president, would have a very different meaning than the one it has now... 🙄

[@Tankeryanker339]

I don't know any of " those people "

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

@@Tankeryanker339I don’t know any personally either. Most people around me are generally sane, except my older brother

[@Rosie_C]

It’s one of the most ridiculous ideas ever… I pray we never have a female president in my lifetime. Wrong on so many levels.

[@mr.zardoz3344]

The new and Improved FDA condones these new responses to periods.

[@Proud_Troll]

"Hey, did you know that period pain is actually a myth?" This literally made me lol out loud.

[@scrapykat3028]

I was working at a call center and I guess we all synced up somehow, but it got a bit “rough” one night. Our lead, a guy, went home for dinner and came back with a bag of chocolates!!! Oh that was nice!

[@owlfethurz8377]

Seriously, it's a known fact that a group of women that live or work closely together sometimes "sync" together. I think it's something about the pheromones. And who says that God has no sense of humor?

[@scrapykat3028]

@@owlfethurz8377 lead guy was married… he knew! And we got M&Ms! The BIG bag!

[@Quekksilber]

​@@owlfethurz8377That must be so that only some of the months is a little hard for everybody, not all of it.

[@fridgewhisperer]

Thanks for looking out for us guys. The women in our lives can rest easy tonight.

[@myliver9149]

I like to make the statement that I do not trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die. Women love this!

[@jennagrigsby9956]

Love the shark swimming back and forth in the background.

[@RedRonFJB]

"Walk It Off" usually works well.

[@Yolozemofo]

I'm a woman with PMDD I approve of this message! 🤣🤣😂 It's good to have a laugh at this, hormones can be a real buzz kill sometimes.

[@evilblackcat6357]

"Nah, you can't come over and hang out today. _Someone's_ been on the Overlook Hotel's Elevator Ride."

[@maryroller4417]

Lol!!!!😂 the hard part isn't your husband at all, it's the teenage daughter that also has her period the same time you do... if there's a guy in the house.. run!

[@linejumper8204]

The brushing of teeth is the absolute best.

[@chuckaddison5134]

Love the shark fin cruising through the background.

[@Objective-Observer]

Dinner on Time... I shall quote my mother: Do you want to eat dinner or WEAR it. She was a cafeteria lady, and the only two male teachers in the school were snarking about the look of the food. So this little 5'3" lady gave them a steely glare and brightly said: do you want to eat this food or wear it. One of the two men said, 'She looks like she means it, and pushed his tray forward.

[@lilmike2710]

My wife is 45 and I'll remind her that she's had 35+ years to learn how to cope with her monthly visitor.. she appreciates when i help like that

[@Alianger]

"Can't you just walk it off?" This one always works

[@kathyd456]

Well done. As a real woman, I endorse this message. Don't argue. I mean it.

[@homesteadgamer1257]

As a woman in perimenopause, I can't say how eager I look forward to the day when its over. Also, starting perimenopause has actually changed my sleep cycle for the better. I have suffered with insomnia my entire life; no joke, I'd always wake right up around midnight and be wide awake for hours even as a young child needing to wake up for school in the morning. But now, I finally get sleepy at night. It's very strange but very welcome.

[@Mohawk_Productions]

As someone who LITERALLY sleeps basically all day and don’t even wake up til 10:30 pm, 9:30 pm and 7:45 pm. It’s so damn weird now to imagine sleeping at night. It’s one of those things where it’s like I see no upside to going to bed at night with a woman

[@JD-8-1971]

My favorite thing is to ask my wife and friends is the old classic. Why do they call it PMS and not "MCD or Mad Cow Disease"? Oh, how they love that we all always have a such great laugh and it never gets old.

[@HelloKitty-jz5gm]

I’ll get her a shovel.

[@pamelalandon2423]

PMS = Putiting up with Men's S@#$!

[@texan-american200]

Have her watch the episode on "MARRIED WITH CHILDREN," and watch Al and Steve suffer being in a snowed in cabin while Peggy, Marcie and Kelly suffer PMS together. Then the two of you can enjoy it and laugh together! 😆😳💥🤯😵‍💫😵🤕

[@susanherbert3014]

Hilarious! And I love the subtle detail of the shark swimming in the background. 🦈