GTA 3: The Definitive Dumpster Fire | Castle Super Beast Clips

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@A_D_Art

[@PokeBattlerJaze]

Triple A Companies: "Don't pirate games pwease." Also Triple A Companies: "We will actively punish you for buying our game, as well as take away your ability to buy the working version."

[@jor4114]

And to that I say "Yar har fiddle dee dee!"

[@BigFingerRo]

Triple A studios, much in the same way Adobe is, are ALL fair game, and should be obtained via use of proxybay on principle.

[@ultraheaven8968]

@@BigFingerRo Amen brother, fuck em

[@albinoburrito900]

@@BigFingerRo idk about all that, but ehen a company goes out of its way to kill a game pirating it should be legal, quite frankly, killing games is the same as burning books, it's just not socially seen as such

[@DEUS_VULT_INFIDEL]

Joel created the Sprunk% speedrun category.

[@DEUS_VULT_INFIDEL]

@Juneda2nd the current Sprunk% WR is 10:40

[@Terithian]

@Juneda2nd Joel (of Vinesauce) accidentally discovered that if you drink enough cans of Sprunk in San Andreas, the game crashes and permanently corrupts your save file.

[@BaconheartStuff]

@@Terithian It doesn't corrupt the save file IIRC. The issue is a problem with the original San Andreas that unintentionally destroys a new feature in the remaster. In every version of SA, when you drink a can of Sprunk at a vending machine, the can model doesn't get despawned afterwards, and they keep building up if you keep doing it, until the game crashes from too many models loaded. And what makes that break the remasters, is they added a new autosave feature and with Joel it happened to autosave as he was drinking the fatal can, so now any time he tries to load that file, it immediately crashes.

[@Terithian]

@@BaconheartStuff Ah, I see. I didn't know the details. Still, the end result is that it destroys your save file.

[@thelegalsystem]

@@Terithian it destroys that specific autos are, but you can at least load a previous save. Still cursed and sprunked.

[@Coconut-219]

"What files were of issue?" Woolie: "ALL OF THEM."

[@Sonicfalcon16]

the fact they still have hot coffee source code for like "yeah we might use this later" is bizarre to me

[@damas92]

Woolies camera makes it look like he's being interviewed for a documentary

[@shiningknight23]

It cracks me up how on the SBFC Woolie had the worst camera, and now his camera is so much better than Pat's its jarring

[@armchairmaster]

Meanwhile Pat's camera makes it look like he's being interrogated by police in 2005.

[@kylo-benshapiro687]

It looks like he's on dateline and they don't want to reveal he's the killer yet so they zoomed in on his face so you can't see his prison stripes.

[@timdoyle3436]

WOOLIE: The Lost Pies, a true story

[@squidyy2k]

Pat’s camera+set up looks like he’s on the set of one of those late 80s fantasy vhs games and the camera got left on and knocked over while the boom operator takes 5 on the couch that’s just out of frame of the tape.

[@alephnole7009]

This reminds me of the Zelda OoT demo in Smash brawl. The entire game is there. And speedrunners found a way to beat the game in under 5 minutes before the demo timer runs out.

[@billvolk4236]

Pat hates sex, he hates kissing, he hates his own bowel movements, he hates anything that could be classified as a bodily function. Pat is an angel trapped in a shell of dirty meat and haunted by a demon of falsehood and madness.

[@trenchcoatjoe1891]

Basically Shinji

[@logandh2]

What are you talking about, he literally slammed her pregnant till she cried, he loves sex

[@krodmandoon3479]

Considering the "hitting the back of Paige's vagina" comment he made years ago, the fact that he's kissed Paige on camera before, and *his child* I'm not sure about those first two points.

[@RocRolDis]

I like the bug in GTA3 where if you wiggle your car left to right, it grows wider and wider.

[@leonthesleepy]

Pat to his daughter: "sOmETimEs people kiss because they want to nUUUUttT"

[@SivTheScribe]

"That's gross, dad."

[@leonthesleepy]

@@SivTheScribe "SHUT UP"

[@KuonilerariLoufanwald]

5:19

[@manwiththemachinegun]

Technically Woolie to his daughter.

[@foo6975]

I imagine him speaks to Zangief or Elmo like that

[@ZionSype]

11:35 This doesn't properly articulate Joel's Insanity. He wasn't just drinking a few cans to get CJ fat; Joel drank nearly ONE THOUSAND Sprunk cans in a row to lower his money to an even number so he could gamble EVERYTHING on the Horse-Racing Minigame. But during this time, he thought it would be funnier if instead of gambling everything, he just spent all his money on over 6000 Sprunk cans before turning the game off for good.

[@vaan_]

Jak X had an in-game unlockable called Hot Coffee which was stupid expensive. Back then I didn't know what it was, and it turned out to just be a 10 second cutscene where nothing happens. Looking back I now know it was meant to mock the San Andreas thing, but as someone out of the loop, it felt really shitty grinding all those races for nothing.

[@pyroicarus1203]

Jak X for an episode of Race War?

[@josh-oo]

There's an achievement for unlocking and viewing it in the PS3/PS4 versions. I love old Naughty Dog's sense of humor. Sucks that it's gone now.

[@MrSkerpentine]

Should’ve been a cutscene of just Jak & Daxter at a nice cafe literally drinking hot coffee lmao

[@ryangallagher8194]

Oh yeah, I remember that and also being super confused!

[@josh-oo]

@@MrSkerpentine I mean, it was Tess and Daxter drinking hot coffee. Basically the same.

[@pheonix2099]

This wouldn't be as much of an issue if they also didn't de-list the original versions of the games on steam and on console. They basicly took away a viable option to play the games only to replace them with botched "upgrades".

[@armchairmaster]

Ah, the "Dark Souls Remastered" way of a rerelease. I love Fromsoft, but FUCK Fromsoft for that shit.

[@thewraithwriter22]

I fucking hate that so much. Speaking as someone both with little money and very outdated hardware, I like the ability to play older games I know can run okay on my system. Also, I like having an archive of stuff

[@nero9341]

@@armchairmaster that was more of a decision of Bandai-Namco, the publisher, than it was of Fromsoft, the developer

[@malikoniousjoe]

@@armchairmaster THANK YOU. I had to get the fuckin PS3 version of DkS1 because of that shit, which also means no mods ever. Fucking absolute cowards, they take down the old release because they know, they absolutely know, that their update isn’t worthy of the title “remaster” and can’t bear to compete with themselves 5 years ago. Why is the industry like this?! If your new take on the game isn’t better to the point of invalidating the old title, then what the fuck did you spend your dev time doing?! Fucking can the remake rather than barricade off the old version which has countless mods and QoL support already created by the fans who made you what you are today.

[@sbfh014]

Me: *buys the three games seperately on the PS4 psn a couple months before the trilogy is announced* "Damnit! Why did I waste money on those!" Me now: "Damn, ngl I'm happy I got those instead of the trilogy"

[@Kango234]

Imagine telling someone back when the PS2 was out that in the future, companies will rerelease their games in a broken and much worse state and then promise to update it over time just to get where it was nearly 20 years ago after charging $60 for it.

[@xsoultillerx]

the $60 price tag i feel is grossest part about the whole thing. the whole thing looks like a $10 unity asset game and you have the nerve to charge "new" prices for 3 games that came out over 20 years ago?

[@leithaziz2716]

@@xsoultillerx Wasn't Mafia 1, a straight up REMAKE, 40 bucks? And if you had the original versions of Mafia 2 and 3, you get the re-releases for free. Even the remasters of the Yakuza games don't cost 60 bucks on Steam when they released, no?

[@xsoultillerx]

@@leithaziz2716 you also got a free upgrade to the special edition of skyrim if you owned the original. also the unity & nightdive ports of doom & quake respectively are basically just sourceports that contain the original files needed to just pop them into one of better sourceports out there.

[@AceRevero]

@@leithaziz2716 Let's also add on to the Mafia list, you can still play both Mafia 1 and 2 Classic if you don't want the definition edition's experience, AND LOOK, THEY AIN'T DELISTED.

[@unboundsky9999]

In the words of a wise individual… Ah shit, here we go again.

[@chadrageus]

Again...

[@FightCain]

Oh yeah, it reminds me. The CEO of Grove Street Games said quote-on-quote: “It’s so fun to see players out there really enjoying what we’ve put together for them. __I’m honestly enjoying this unparalleled level of scrutiny on our studio__ Today we are celebrating our monumental project launch, while we work on updates. :-)" It’s from his Twitter account too.

[@charleswisconsin9196]

mind-bottling

[@LegallyBlindGamer727]

Ok Pat mentioned Joel and Joel mentioned Pat. I feel weird and yet complete.

[@PalKiba]

Joel mentioned Pat? Where/When?

[@jchverman]

@@PalKiba During the October Trash Bag, specifically while playing Earl's day off. A highlight video is out with him mentioning it

[@alphax-shroom6781]

All linked by eating dog food

[@PalKiba]

@@jchverman Huh.. I can’t find it.

[@jchverman]

@@PalKiba kzbin.info/www/bejne/jZfWfmigj8-iq7s It's about 19 minutes in

[@Jact01]

To be fair, ruining your save file by drinking too much soda is kind of a weird meta analog to real life.

[@Nerevar5me]

Where can I find this clip they’re talking about, Hank Scorpio?

[@smugalice6206]

@@Nerevar5me on Joel Vinesauce’s channel

[@Nerevar5me]

@@smugalice6206 thanks, that was gold

[@Blackmore2323]

I wish i was able to catch this live to let woolie/pat know that 90% of the OG devs are gone. Hell even Dan houser(writer and co-creator),and lazlo have left the company. Rockstar games died a long time ago. This is now take two rockstar, just souless.

[@leithaziz2716]

Didn't Dan Houser leave after RDR2? What a damn good game to leave on.

[@Eddman368]

Just like blizzard

[@Kango234]

@@leithaziz2716 Yeah, I don't want to spread a false narrative or anything, but a lot of people think he left because if GTA VI ever came out it would just be an online game as opposed to a story focused one which is the opposite of what Dan wanted.

[@AwkwardLoser]

These games needed “The Benz”

[@leithaziz2716]

@@Kango234 Maybe. I feel like he probably left because 1. He worked enough time and wanted to take a break, or 2. he realised Take 2's only concern is supporting GTA online and the company wasn't as interested in making new games anymore, prompting him to leave.

[@FightCain]

You could put violence, gore, sexual content in a huge font size on the front of the package and a huge M in arial black bolded behind a white background on the back and parents will still buy it for the kids. Also, so many mods shut down (even non related to reverse engineering ones) just for garbage to take over.

[@ricardomiles2957]

The only way to make parents to know the game isn't for kids is by putting huge petagrams and write "satanism" on the cover

[@JoelBurger]

And one of the funniest things about Hot Coffee is just how much of a non-issue it was. Like the characters weren't even nude. Parents were getting up-in-arms over clothed character models awkwardly rubbing up against each other.

[@leithaziz2716]

@@JoelBurger Well, it was the early 2000, so people were likely much more sensitive about such topics. That might be a good or bad thing depending on your view (I'd say that's probably a good thing, but im an openminded guy)

[@koheikyouji]

I remember I was in GAME once and a woman was buying GTA for her 9 year old kid (guessing the age). I ended up stopping her and telling her what it contained. She looked SHOCKED as to what was in this 18+ game despite it being on the back of the box. Is reading just not a thing anymore?

[@ricardomiles2957]

@@koheikyouji it's like Woolie said, if it's popular enough it's for kids, if a kid wants it, it's for kids

[@tzera_rhuon]

“The people have spoken, and we’ve heard them,” said Sam Houser, president of Rockstar Games. “They’re not interested in these new versions of San Andreas and Vice City. They couldn’t care less, in fact. It just proves what we’ve known for years; players aren’t interested in the classics they played growing up, or even single player DLC that can extend the narrative campaign. They would just rather be playing GTA 5. We tried shaking up our formula and paying attention to something else, and everyone got really mad at us. We hear you loud and clear: just Five stuff from here on out. We’ve even put Six on the backburner for now.”

[@ultraheaven8968]

That might aswell be a real quote at this point

[@CasualRemy]

Hard Drive lmao

[@zeroattentiongaming820]

I feel like Square Enix deserves some serious praise when it comes to stuff like this at times. They lost the source code for Kingdom Hearts a long time ago, so they remade the entire game from the ground up with the intent of it being as visually close to the original as possible, just in HD with some QOL improvements. That is seriously impressive and largely nailed it. Of course they don't always go that level of effort, but still praiseworthy when they did.

[@OPLOmega]

It's both commendable and a detriment to the 1.5 HD Remix. Commendable in that even for some of the off bits here and there, the KH1FM Remaster really is stunningly faithful. A detriment in that the other two games didn't get the same kind of treatment that 1 did. Like, when you look at some of the still images used for the non-narrated text bits for the Days movie, you start to wonder, "Wait, even though some of these are retextures, did they really just HD texture and also make completely new models for Days exclusive Heartless?" And then you realize that they were likely 50% done with a proper Days remake but just didn't have the time (especially with how some scenes in the movie fade to black as if you were supposed to cut into gameplay) so they went and just made a cutscene movie. Then there's Re: CoM, which is practically untouched so you get the weird juxtaposition of the weird HD KH1 Sora model that's been used ever since DDD, only to go back to the OG KH1 Sora model in Re: CoM.

[@TAMAMO-VIRUS]

@@OPLOmega Don't forget reaction commands sometimes straight up not working in the final battle of 2 HD

[@OhEmJemania]

@@OPLOmega For the days thing: They originally wanted to completely remake Days, but decided against it due to multiple reasons ultimately all tying back to them having to finally start working on KH3 or else the fanbase would literally tear them apart. A Days remake would have pushed KH3 back multiple years.

[@mikeharris2952]

Shame that they turned around and announced cloud versions for the Switch, even 1.5 + 2.5.

[@garywintle8023]

FFVIII is a great example of a remaster done right. The textures are enhanced, but retain the style of the original game. That is not easy to pull of.

[@no1important777]

best part of the joel shit is knowing he only did that to get his money even for gambling it all away on a horse named holy colon. guzzling thousands of cans, just to gamble. it was beautiful.

[@Drawersama]

The lincenced music what obviously the more important reason to pull it off. No company wants to mess with that dinosaur.

[@FlameOfUdun96]

We needed a new dumpster fire anyway, the Cyberpunk one was starting to fizzle out

[@GIZMONDO987]

Just in time for Cyberpunk to win a bunch at the Game Awards despite being a dumpster fire.

[@leithaziz2716]

@@GIZMONDO987 I think for all the bugs and glitches, if they were fixed, I'd likely call Cyberpunk a good game with confidence. But in the state that it's currently in, I can't call it a GOTY contender. That would speak volume of the industry right now if it won in its current state.

[@GIZMONDO987]

@@leithaziz2716 Well it spoke volumes last year when a game with absolutely horrifying levels of crunch and other ghoulish shit going on practically swept, so I'm not gonna be surprised if Cyberpunk gets that "best rpg award" despite being next to SMT 5 and a bunch of way less jank stuff.

[@leithaziz2716]

@@GIZMONDO987 You can be mad that SMT V might get brushed off the board, but then you have me realising that a game like Guilty Gear: Strive didnt even get nominated for best soundtrack OR best art direction. The former is subjective, I get it, but the latter makes me go "WTF?". Then you have Lost Judgment (LJ not on best story? Considering the contenders, really?) and NEO TWEWY which didn't get ANY nominees. Tldr, Game Awards are bullshit.

[@xsoultillerx]

@@leithaziz2716 i'd argue that it's a 6/10 at best after all of the patches. it's not this freeform immersive sim they promised (and it never will be) but it's a competent GTA clone by eurojank standards that's carried by it's worldbuilding & writing.

[@tylergregoire1763]

This game is a perfect embodiment of the Rockstar Mentality. Tactless and tone deaf.

[@FightCain]

Don’t forget to mention Take Two. They’re also responsible for this

[@WTFisTingispingis]

@@FightCain Different heads, same hydra.

[@malikoniousjoe]

@@WTFisTingispingis If by Hydra we mean the industry as a whole

[@FutBoy281]

Does it also control like shit? They normally love that

[@RhysClark97]

8:00 for context everyone, rockstar removed all the old versions of the games, these became the only ones you can buy and you had to buy them on the rockstar launcher or on consoles, they recently re-added the old versions back onto the rockstar launcher but nowhere else, their are emulaited versions of this trilogy that were hd high framerate versions you could buy on the ps4 that i currently own that you no longer can and they work much better than the "definitive edition" versions

[@ChillaxingJay]

As someone who grew up on the original ps2 trilogy and still prefers them over gta iv and v, this is such a massive slap in the face from Rockstar. My disappointment is immeasurable and my only hope is that they can fix up the bugs so at least it won't be a buggy mess. Fuck Rockstar and Grove Street Games for everything they did with this "definitive" edition

[@ricardomiles2957]

I remember people getting mad at me back when people even dreamed of a "next gen" version of GTAV when I said that the story of GTAV was boring and that GTAonline(back then) was the only fun I had with that world.

[@xsoultillerx]

@@ricardomiles2957 how did you have fun with GTA online? back then it was pretty boring and now it's practically P2W.

[@leithaziz2716]

@@ricardomiles2957 People just wanted DLC of GTA V which the devs promised back then. I don't blame them considering IV's DLC and the fact that Rockstar went back on their words. Also I gotta admit, I rarely ever had fun with GTA Online, probably because I often played with randos who kept failing missions and making me restart.

[@ricardomiles2957]

@@xsoultillerx I mostly played team death match and races, I liked because at least on that setting the generic story made sense. Unlike single player

[@ricardomiles2957]

4:25 Reminds me of a situation when a mom brought her son to watch Deadpool 1 when it released and she ranted on Facebook about the sex scenes in a """""""kids movie"""""""""""""

[@leithaziz2716]

I have a feeling people made similar "complaints" when they went to see The Dark Knight.

[@iller3]

imagine thinking "the Joker" was a kids movie. Even Pat should avoid it because of that apartment Chain-Lock scene

[@Dragonsmana]

@@iller3 This joke is going to go under appreciated, and I just want to say, I see it, and its perfect.

[@TheGrayMysterious]

For context on the Joel bit: he spent nearly an hour making CJ drink Sprunk from a vending machine, something like 600+ cans of it. San Andreas has an internal limit on the number of objects that can be spawned in the world before the game's memory is overloaded, and Joel hit that limit before the game could despawn all the cans. This is a bug that exists in the original... but the Definitive Edition ALSO has an autosave function that went off right as the game crashed, meaning that save has all those cans of Sprunk loaded into memory and will always crash on startup.

[@CaffeinatedKing]

The part I don't get is that GTAV is making all of the money in the universe, constantly, at all times, for years on end. How, or why would Rockstar let this "remaster" be done in exactly the worst and cheapest way possible. People love those old games, some tidying up of functionality and quality of life with some up-ressing at the very least based on the already existing PC versions would have been completely fine and profitable. I just don't get it, what is going on in Rockstar that lead to such a huge lack of foresight and planning. It makes me think the company doesn't actually exist and GTAV getting regular online updates is some kind of group delusion that is somehow being maintained by the masses.

[@UndeadGary]

Most already successful companies have very short term mindsets these days with focus on cutting costs to up their profit margin rather than making good products to ensure future growth.

[@jasonwalker4003]

@@UndeadGary Thing is, R* usually isn't short term focused, in fact they're some of the most long term minded devs out there, everything they've made in the last 10 years or so has been meant to last its entire generation and beyond.

[@UndeadGary]

@@jasonwalker4003 true but many great companies decline. Your always only a couple key leadership changes away at all times from a completely different company in how its run.

[@leonthesleepy]

As someone who likes RDR2, i TOTALLY agree with Pat on how restrictive it is during missions.

[@jakejutras5420]

The older R* games are exactly the same during missions. You couldn't get creative on how to finish them, you followed the text exactly or mission failed.

[@leonthesleepy]

@@jakejutras5420 Never played the older GTA 3 series, if it is like that, my criticism still stands. I wish it had more flexibility. BUT, i still love RDR2 for just how immersive its open world is. The missions tho, are just ok.

[@AceRevero]

@@jakejutras5420 I wouldn't say that's true. A lot of older GTA games has less restrictive freedom due to R* not being able to set those boundaries. So even when the game told you how to do the mission, you still have lean way to mess around and potentially use it to your advantage, an examples is GTA 3 "Farewell, Chunkly Lee - 8 Ball trick" or GTA 4 "Bull in China Shop - Immediately destroy the windows" RDR2 is WAY restrictive. Casually getting off your horse during a mission, just to pick up flowers or a dead animal, is enough for the game to fail you. Saddle the wrong house, go too far left or right, take a moment to gather in scenery, tried to use melee in a reasonable way, take an alternate route. All of this is very likely to mission fail. It's basically a rollercoaster ride with minimal interactivity. If want a better explanation, go watch NakeyJakey vid on RDR2.

[@jakejutras5420]

@@AceRevero I agree that it got worse over time and there were standout missions in the older titles however "Follow the damn train CJ!" Was well known for a reason.

[@wrequiem1727]

@@jakejutras5420 Yeah, honestly Pat's and everyone who agrees with his take is... nah. I tried playing Vice City not too long ago and my major problem is exactly what they're complaining about

[@uservenny84]

Pat's description of the awful mission structure in RDR2 is spot on.

[@kingofbel6499]

It just BLOWS my mind that I remember being a kid reading on magazines about the Hot Coffee content being found in GTA San Andreas, and now the exact same thing is happening again!

[@Sludgeberries]

This is a rare crossover episode where Joel and [Scythelord] ruin a game so hard, it takes Pat and [Crazy Talk] to make any fuckin sense of the situation

[@3s7acad0]

I have a personal anecdote in regards to the whole "demo that was the entire game" thing- back in the day I played a demo for the co-op beat-em-up Charlie Murder. Pretty decent game, but importantly the game lets you play it up until right before you kill the first boss, after which the screen slowly zooms in and gets a little blurry while the game is still going until the "Buy the full game now!!!" Screen popped up. I'd gotten there with one character, thought "hey this is pretty cool" then started the game again as another character. This time however, the game kept going past the boss, because while the screen was zooming in he actually died and the level kept going and the camera snapped to the correct position. I think what happened was, because I had a feel for the game now and was playing as a DPS character, I was actually able to beat the boss before the game purchase screen came up, thereby bypassing it. I then proceeded to beat the game in one sitting because I couldn't save... But then I felt bad and bought it 😂

[@BrazillianCara]

Aka, "How to make the visual issues with N64 Online seem negligible in comparison."

[@PalKiba]

Wow They’re talking about Joel Sprunking for 45 mins.

[@tailedgates9]

*In Big Smoke's voice* All you had to do, what port the games over, Grove Street Games!

[@MrStath1986]

I think Pat hit the nail on the head in terms of my eventual issues with RDR2, in that as much as you can make some vague choices with Arthur, the ending is pretty much always going to be the same; I played him as a decent person and I kept getting pushed into bad choices - the mission with Micah where you basically have to butcher a whole town - and was basically repeatedly told what a terrible guy I was. Like.. If Rockstar are that intent on this approach to storytelling, just *make a movie*. And for the love of Christ, make the controls less complicated. One of my earliest memories from the game is accidentally blowing a person away because I hit the wrong button, rather than help them from under the horse they were trapped under.

[@WTFisTingispingis]

*Thank you.*

[@charleswisconsin9196]

that last part is definitely on you.

[@tpeack]

i didn't even make it to the ending, i know people love arthur but i really couldn't get into him, i feel like i'm pretty good at stepping into a characters shoes and doing what i feel they'd do whenever i play rpgs with defined characters. arthur has regrets and wants to do right by people/the gang, they raised him so they're his priority but he still has a moral compass to some degree. sometimes he's a monster lying to himself that he's good at heart, sometimes he's a good guy who does bad things to help the people he cares about, he runs the gamut, he's complex in the sense that he's everything, he's vague to the point where everything is applicable and nothing is consistent, he exists in that state so you can tread water until something defined happens. there's a part where hosea tells him to stop hiding who he is/his intellect and step up, like the real arthur is one thing and everything the player does is the face/the lie so they can justify the major disconnects. do a good dead or massacre a town, nothing felt like it mattered, spend the entire game as a saint, doesn't matter you're a mass murderer in the next mission, be the monster? doesn't matter as arthur's journal will say he doesn't enjoy doing the thing he does every 5 minutes. i got to the saint denis segment/heist/feeding guy to a super croc bit and realized none of the set pieces did anything for me, i wasn't enjoying them. every character i was interested in i already knew the fate of and none of the new guys left much of an impression outside of micah who only exists so you can kill a villain as all the rest make it to the sequel. when any of them died it was more like running through a checklist than losing someone you cared about. it all felt like treading water, waiting for characters to tip toe to where they are by the time red dead 1 roles around whilst padding the run time. i went and hunted a legendary cat and returned to peterson to find he'd despawned at that point in the game and i'd have to play a few more hours of story and re-hunt the thing, and the fact that having to play more of the game immediately felt like a chore was really alien to me, idk it's weird that i was playing something thinking i should like this and it'll all click eventually, like eating a full meal that you don't love and hoping it has a nice aftertaste. red dead 1 was real fun though.

[@BigSisterNeko]

I’ve never been as disappointed and dissatisfied with Rockstar since the introduction of those damn shark cards in GTA V. The “joke” turned out to be super lucrative.

[@xsoultillerx]

i gave the SA remastered a try because it was on game pass and i immediately uninstalled it after an hour and a half of playing. my favorite part of playing it was how my car literally did a kickflip into some guy's backyard because i made a slight turn.

[@AceRevero]

My intro literality had CJ saying his "ah shit, here we go again" line TWICE, and it was really loud.

[@inktoxicant]

Oops, we accidentally the whole yakuza

[@Bestboiinois]

Man, we accidentally the WHOLE yakuza

[@HoChiMints2007]

My hands are messed up so you better drive brother! On second thought...nah

[@navarroguard7911]

Its insane that no big name content creators that cover this talk about T2 DMCA striking mods for 3, vc and SA

[@pyropoyo]

Since Pat mentioned RDR2's nonsense with its missions, everyone go watch NakeyJakey's video on the game if you haven't already. I love that video and I love all of Naked Jacob's videos. I hope hes doing well.

[@chimeraelite]

Yessir mah boi

[@CasualRemy]

I'm going to rewatch it after this. He's a treasure

[@michaelkitchin9665]

Rockstar really did clamp down on the sandbox over time. I don't want a directed experience from GTA. I don't need all of LA in LA Noire.

[@baeblade8645]

My friend who I had told about Yakuza was talking about the Kiwami 2 demo, said he played it for a while and it’s still going. Turns out he got the demo early enough to get it when it was the full game. Not sure if 6 had the same thing happen but that would be pretty hilarious

[@shershahad2152]

Can confirm, same thing with 6

[@117johnpar]

couple millions of dollars worth of 'you had one job"

[@johnfromthewest]

It's almost amazing that games like the souls series or mafia 2 were actually acceptable ports

[@leithaziz2716]

Mafia 2 remastered was a terrible port, but then you have Mafia 1 which is an excellent remake that likely overshadowed it. I see more people bring it up when it comes to updating a classic and comparing it to the GTA DE.

[@Dabajaws]

@@leithaziz2716 a bit off topic but an LA Noire remake by the team that did the mafia 1 remake would be lovely

[@WTFisTingispingis]

Apparently Rockstar wanted to remake the games properly, but Take Two, being the GENIUSES at business that they are (fucking snake oil salesmen) were like 'lmao nah'

[@michealhunt6607]

The talk about demo's reminds me of when you could easily play the full version of Yakuza 6 on the demo that Sega released...oh they literally brought it up lol As for GTA.....whew lads. What a way to treat the (arguably) 3 games that made you into the giants you are today i would have at the very least used some of that GTA:Online dollar to get most of the music. The cheek of them to call it a 'definitive edition' for that alone

[@xsoultillerx]

my favorite examples of demos being the full game was how recently someone beat the OOT demo in brawl with speedrunning strats/glitches. i'm not into speedrunning but that was pretty impressive.

[@ricardomiles2957]

Rockstar died when GTA online launched. RDR2 only happened because was already under development, GTA6 will never happen, the ps2 GTAs will become the new Skyrim. Rest in pepperoni

[@loganwernicke7604]

Actually facts

[@Ketsuekisan]

Nah, GTA6 will happen, but there won't be a single-player mode, it'll just be GTA Online 2.

[@jeangreffsbp]

@@Ketsuekisan GTA 6 will only happen when Rockstar cant port GTA Online to newer console generations

[@tennesseewastelander7931]

Well this aged like shit, lmao

[@ricardomiles2957]

@@tennesseewastelander7931 old rockstar is still dead, unless agaisnt all odds the single player receive the same level of attention and post launch care like gta4 i won't change my opinion

[@donniebell7887]

Rdr2 leaned so hard into 'realism' that it ruined it for me. Horse broke its neck tripping over a foot tall slope. Carried my saddle for 20 minutes to buy a new one went back to pick up what I had to leave behind, attacked by a bear, second horse dead. Haven't touch it since.

[@leithaziz2716]

I can understand that frustration. I loved my playthrough of RDR2, but I could only do a single playthrough. Loved the narrative and setpieces, but I can't deal with the controlls enough to wanna do it again. I'd rather leave my experience with the game on a positive note.

[@questingmoo]

Literally just buy horse reviver or reload an autosave

[@msbkaioken136]

That's utterly hilarious and also a really stupid reason to drop the game it's a masterpiece and easily the most polished game ever made

[@donniebell7887]

@@msbkaioken136 this was after playing the game for 12 hours and not having any fun like in the first RDR. All this cool cowboy shit constantly interrupted by needing to eat, sleep and bathe. I know an invincible teleporting horse breaks the "realism" but it's fucking game. Adding time consuming repetitive chores between the good bits isn't fun to me. I know it's a good game objectively I just didn't enjoy it myself.

[@msbkaioken136]

@@donniebell7887 that is incredibly old tired complaints anyone who actually looks into those mechanics know they're not that big of a deal you absolutely do not need to eat sleep or bathe it's not mandatory if you do even the slightest bit of exploring food isn't a problem and takes 2 seconds to eat and sleeping and bathing isn't an issue at all for the most part they're fun mechanics to role-play with but they're not really mandatory at all just like the horse mechanics they're extremely in-depth but completely optional they're not repetitive or time-consuming because you don't need to do them a lot at all once every now and then is plenty to get through the game and maybe you don't know this because you only played 12 hours and yes it is only but you can fast travel in this game so teleporting horse is a thing oh and I almost didn't catch it but you're complaining about needing to revive your horse another bad complaint because you can do it easily just use a revive unless you're just bad you won't need to do it often enough to have none the game has complex mechanics with solutions to completely bypassed them if you don't want to partake these complaints were stupid when the game first out and certainly are now that we know how the game works in and out I would highly suggest trying the game out again because you definitely didn't give it a wide enough birth

[@Wanna_Be_Desu]

I'm just excited for a new Crowbcat video lol

[@EATABAGOFHELL]

6:30 id released a Quake demo CD at one point that also contained the full version Quake as well as the ENTIRE id back catalog in encrypted zip form. Idea was, you'd dial a 1-800 number and read em out your credit card number, and they'd use that number to generate a pseudorandom key to unlock, say, Doom2 or Commander Keen or whatever. Even in 1996 it didn't take long for people to figure out that an encryption scheme with a key short enough to read over the phone is PRETTY EASY to crack.

[@Arcademan09]

It's weird, as soon as I saw that there mobile versions I knew *IMMEDIATELY* there were going to be based off the terrible mobile versions

[@Jgt612]

On the topic of kids playing what they shouldn’t, that was my favourite thing in MKX. No child I will not let you play, your parents shouldn’t have bought you this game now hold this 50/50 mix from Ermac.

[@Lonequacker]

Man...after watching multiple scenes from the Netflix Cowboy Bebop that were so bad I felt like I was gonna throw up I CANNOT WAIT to hear them rant about the show on the podcast.

[@JakeN482]

24:13 People need to read the mythical man month. Infinite polish can't do shit against unreal expectations and bad management.

[@cytorakdemon]

I think my favorite glitch was if you swerved your car side to side while driving straight, your car would steadily get bigger.

[@Bapper0]

Just to be clear, that’s actually a glitch in the original one and requires the ghost car set up. It’s still hilarious tho.

[@ProxyDoug]

The bike camera actually shows your own character, they took the camera in first person which is just places in front of their face, and flipped it backwards.

[@zeroattentiongaming820]

The Ps4 actually had the Ps2 version of SA available in HD. Sadly it's gone now. Why couldn't that be ported to everything for fucks sake?

[@alephnole7009]

I believe the Halo CE classic has recently been officially fixed as of this year.

[@slipangle3027]

Pat, a lot of the people who worked on the PS2 GTA games don't work for rockstar anymore, Dan Houser, Leslie Benzies, and Lazlow all left.

[@just_matt214]

*! SPRUNKED !*

[@alephnole7009]

The rain gets even worse if your in a plane.

[@SpectreAdept]

On today’s episode of The Industry Continues to Justify Piracy

[@StanNotSoSaint]

Lack of respect for their own legacy sounds pretty accurate it seems.

[@KuonilerariLoufanwald]

The Tuff Nuts donut sign will be the pinnacle of this fucking trash fire

[@baldurofwrath]

The lighting thing is the most true thing ever. Dark Souls remastered is one of the most egregious, but also the Arkham asylum remaster.

[@baldurofwrath]

Also no excuse for Pats terrible opinion on the Bluepoint remakes after saying lighting gets botched, those remakes have completely different feelings to the originals, especially the SoTC remake mainly due to the lighting.

[@goticogordo]

GTA IV is easily the best of them all

[@Allups]

im playing a much better modded San Andreas right now

[@jesusmunoz6372]

My wallet dodged a bullet on this one.

[@MarbleVirus]

I do not want to come out as a nintendo defender but I remember seeing posts running around saying "*THIS* is how you do a game compilation unlike 3D all-stars, nintendo" I wonder how those people are doing.

[@CaptWolfy]

To be fair, the soda bug Joel got was present in the original version. Or so I've read from a comment.

[@Neodeleux]

It was just a crash, not a save file corrupting mess.

[@CaptWolfy]

That too, yeah. It happened to auto save at the moment of the crash, rendering that save unloadable and making it appear corrupted.

[@s7robin105]

Thankfully they are readding the original games to PC. You can basically make your own remaster of the game with better quality mods than this.

[@nathanmarshall745]

21:41 I mean, Leslie Benzies and Lazlo aren't with rockstar anymore but yeah, Houser is

[@117johnpar]

Am I legitimately insane or did this already happen with San Andreas with the upressed mobile ports onto the PC/New Consoles? I could swear on my life that this entire thing with people discovering its just the mobile port from the Gym minigame was an article from like 2016.

[@TheAtlasReview]

GTA Online is so successful that it killed any hope of singleplayer DLC like Undead Nightmare. My take on Red Dead 2 is that it's a good game but there are way too many mechanics that waste time, like cleaning weapons, crafting bullets and the inability to fast-travel. Pat's right about it feeling like being directed by George Lucas.

[@DoktahDoktah]

I wonder if they could get sued for keeping that music in the game. Because technically they sold unlicensed music.

[@CatalystOfFire]

The Metal Gear HD trilogy is absolutely brilliant as well. Thanks bluepoint!

[@iamnuff1992]

Every time I hear Pat talk about RDR2 he sounds crazier and crazier. "Oh when I take a mission in game, the game makes me do the mission. Why even give me control at all, why doesn't the game just play itself like a movie." Once you pick up a story-mission, you have to actually _do_ the story, yes. That's how narrative games work. If you take a mission to ride across the county, take out your gun and rob a train, but you turn 180 degrees as soon as the mission starts and run off outside of the mission area without your horse or gun, and abandon the group of NPCs then the mission will fail. GTA:SA worked exactly the same way. Hell, most games in this genre work this way. I genuinely don't know what the fuck his problem is.

[@Dragonsmana]

GTA4 was the last one I even cared to give the time of day. Great story and it didn't go too hard on the "realism" yet in terms of gameplay. Its a small blessing I guess it likely won't get ported and botched like this. Rockstar will do anything to avoid acknowledging how much they screwed that voice actor and don't want to pay him out of some sort of spite or legal issues, probably both.

[@ricardomiles2957]

Didn't something similar happened with John Marston's VA? I wonder how they settled things up

[@Dragonsmana]

@@ricardomiles2957 Not sure to be honest, I just remember Niko's voice actor dispute blowing up before even social media was really a thing. Its likely too much bad blood between the parties at this point, but who knows?

[@Chickenbowser]

I'm with Pat on GTAV and RD2 being infuriating to play. I had bought V when it came out because I enjoyed the III trilogy and IV. V just felt like a soulless bloated and miserable experience. Over produced and overly controlled. One mission had you go to a garage to get your getaway car. I backed out too far onto the road and got a Mission Failed screen. Not even like I backed out half a mile, like maybe forty feet at most. The game is so anal on it's control factor and wanting to create a "cinematic" experience that it becomes a chore to get through. That moment, and Trevor just as a whole made me decide I was done buying Rockstar games. And this was before Rockstar got super sleezy with their freemium online garbage.

[@xsoultillerx]

i'm a little confused here but i never had the "control" issues with GTA5 that you or pat had. my major problems with 5 were... -that they put so much emphasis on heists in the singleplayer game but there's only 2 "proper" ones in the whole game. -the story is all over the place because they're trying to juggle 3 PCs at once. and there's never a satisfying resolution to the story as a result. -money is surprisingly hard to come by for a game about bank robbers. outside of heists mission payouts are practically peanuts. -michael's family are all terrible people who never get any form of comeuppance. like they're all assholes to him for no reason.

[@InvaderKaz2008]

I really never fucking understood why people liked Trevor. There is nothing redeeming about him at all. The only enjoyment I have with him is when he is literally being a fucking clown for our amusement. Then there's Michael. I promise you, I tried to play Michael as good as I possibly could because he felt the most like a GTA protagonist to me (aside from Franklin, arguably just a shittier CJ), and god fucking damn do I regret trying to show restraint because the game NEVER rewards you for that. You can go an entire playthrough never killing an NPC aside from clear bad guys or quest essential kills, never have sex with a hooker, and take every possible opportunity to spend time with your family and help them out or rescue them from stupid situations they got themselves into and no matter what they will still call you a homicidal, cheating, psychopathic asshole who doesn't care about his family; they'll treat you like dirt no matter how hard you try. Add in that they never get what they deserve and that is fucking AWFUL game design.

[@ricardomiles2957]

@@InvaderKaz2008 it's not like I like GTAV either but... that "dissonance" between story and gameplay was always there, maybe the more satirical scenarios in the early games made them passable but it was always like that. Even on Bully

[@InvaderKaz2008]

@@ricardomiles2957 sure but I feel that if they constantly want to tell me that the character I play as is a massive piece of shit, while repeatedly giving me chances and choices to show that he isn't that bad a guy, that's a major snafu in design. I helped Michael's family every chance I had, I didn't kill anyone I didn't have to, I avoided fucking around too much in free play, and I tried to do the more ethical options in missions and heists, and yet, still, Michael is apparently satan on earth.

[@msbkaioken136]

Just like Pat's terrible take on GTA V and rdr2 this is also unbelievably stupid

[@WraxTV]

What's wild to me about the Deus Ex things is that, you can just replace the model for the dildo with something else? Or make the texture completely alpha transparent? I doubt the game just sculpts the model on the fly within the stage, it probably retrieves the model from a folder and copies that to the game... so just, make that object invisible or something harmless, then ALL of them will be removed. Hot Coffee makes more sense considering that's mostly a code thing and God knows removing a line of code somewhere can cause something completely different to fall apart.

[@perfectharbinger1398]

Reminder: Here in Australia, this collection is $99.95. To put it in perspective, *Mass Effect Legendary Edition* is CHEAPER!

[@conspiracypanda1200]

Kills me that I saw the game in stores LAST WEEK for $79.00AUD, which was equal to Persona 5 Strikers on Switch. And GTA5 Premium Edition was _right next to it_ for $39.00! I know these numbers because I took a photo of that shit. It's why I also know Balan Wonderworld was selling for $9.95 on PS4.

[@JackSilver1410]

That was a roller coaster. "Wait, there's someone who DOESN'T like RDR2?" "But it's Pat. What psychotic, overblown little nitpick got his panties in a bunch now?" ".......... I mean... okay, that's fair. It doesn't bother me personally, but I can see how it would grate on someone.."

[@Bandalorian]

Someone please tell me I'm wrong but does Pat do a disproportionate amount of research in these podcasts and Woolie always just sits there guessing from his shallow perspective? I do not watch entire podcasts and there's a good chance Woolie pulls his own research weight but those episodes are usually boring.

[@HDmexsComboCon]

This release came to me as "we need more money to fund gta6, rerelease the nostalgia but not the good kind so we get more money"

[@lordkeyblade1936]

In 343's defense they have gone back and done work to make halo 1 and 2 look like they did original it took them some time but they did it Rockstar I don't think will go back and do something similar

[@NekoUrabe]

That ending made me sad

[@zacharychristy8928]

The "get the poison out" thing is straight up from Opie and Anthony. I know Woolie listened to them at some point too, lol.

[@deathwatch2238]

Uncle Paul has to suck the persun out

[@zacharychristy8928]

@@deathwatch2238 just gonna rub on a little erl...

[@Comkill117]

“Based on the mobile versions” might be the worst way to go about remastering something.

[@Judgementxxx]

And using an AI to do it aswell.

[@BHSDesk]

23:26 In ten-plus years of watching these guys, I have never seen Pat's eyes go this wide. I am a bit disturbed.

[@sompret]

SPRUNKED SAVEFILE

[@Jirekianu]

It's pretty clear that with the definitive edition version of the GTA games? They didn't even have a human glance through them. Not an ounce of QA was done on them. They slapped them into an AI upscaler, checked to see if they would start up at all. Then said they were good to go. Someone took a weekend and ported/upscaled shit ass mobile versions on the cheap and then shoveled them out the door in one of the laziest fucking cash grab moves a publisher could make.

[@Willowposting]

Sprunk'd it.

[@jeffreygilson1565]

Hot Coffee is still an issue? Meanwhile last of us pt2 has much more graphically shown and not made AO rating lol

[@LuminousLead]

11:18 Which Joel is that? The Vinesauce one? Ah, yes it is. I should go check it out.

[@Toxic_Korgi]

It's remasters like Silent Hill and GTA that make me appreciate Skyrim ports despite the saturation. Its because skyrim is easy to port apparently but its better than trying to port older games and messing up spectacularly.

[@zeroattentiongaming820]

100% with you about RDR2 Pat. I think the game is a genuine masterpiece but as a game it just doesn't appeal to me. I respect it but I don't enjoy it.

[@masterofbloopers]

Glad to see Joel’s Sprunk escapades are making the rounds.

[@Neodeleux]

Certified Sprunk Situation tm