he was mute for 9 years

[@syrmor]

hello peeps, hope you're having a good day! how are you doing this week? follow me at twitter.com/SyrmorS

[@qbrock2622]

Yass

[@potatosaladinc7488]

Im doing alright, just reminiscing over the padt before this video came up

[@ramzi11a19]

Syrmor I’m sad bc my friend just got a vr headset >;(

[@echdeath629]

A

[@andreyisinsane2162]

I’m having a great Oofer.

[@dsoke9959]

it’s satisfyingly ironic that in this conversation he’s the one airing out speech while the other participant is quietly listening

[@aretzuu]

How do I pin a comment that's not on my video-

[@testhekid]

that detail is as precise as the lofi zelda cos link doesn't talk comment

[@Slicer11221]

I mean I'm sure he cuts out the questions he asks

[@supertthegamer670]

Well that's how you let out feelings. Once you talk and talk and talk, it's your brain taking your emotions and putting them out in a story. .if that makes sense. . But when people tell stories like this, your subconscious takes this info, and makes you improve. (Only for some people, btw.) But your subconscious takes that, some in small amounts some in big amounts, and it matures you.

[@NG.4769]

I mean there are plenty of jump cuts bro lol

[@tylershep4220]

Maybe this is fucked up but when he mentioned the Discord server I imagined everyone hopping into a voice channel and then just being completely silent

[@Schulzenberger]

I was hoping to find that comment, exactly what I thought lol

[@prodjvenchy]

💀 bruh same

[@yazanali4603]

Lol same it will be only wind noises like woooosshh

[@gustsmith6600]

So fucked but you're not alone.

[@thatoneleaf9895]

I FUCKING THOUGHT THE SAME THING BUT imagine theres like a couple of them talking because they are selective mutes who made strong relationships with other mutes

[@Junior_Psychonaut]

“I attracted the kind of person who likes to hear themselves talk and can carry out a conversation by themselves” Me, vividly remembers befriending the “quiet kid” in my class by having a one person conversation with her for about a month until she felt comfortable enough to actually converse back: Yeah that makes sense

[@GreenMachineOG]

I'm one of the quiet ones, I've noticed that a lot of people seem to enjoy talking "with" me because I listen and occasionally ask questions or just empathize with them. Idk it's just how I am, I don't know what to say and only really converse with a few close friends

[@Lemon-mf7lz]

i swear the quiet kids are either great or the best to befriend

[@Junior_Psychonaut]

Lemon They truly are. I was new to that school and I was not having a fun time starting off my 6th grade year not knowing anyone (as we know middle schoolers are some of the meanest people in the world). I’m used to befriending the ‘quiet kids’ since I sorta gravitate towards them and tend to click with them easily, also my best friend at my old school was the schools quiet kid so I was used to these types of people at this point. The ‘quiet kids’ are usually some of the nicest kids you can befriend, or the memeiest in my experience, and sure you’ve got a put in a little bit of effort but it’s so worth it. Oh yeah and a tip for if anyone reading this who wants to try and get a “quiet/shy kid” to be your friend, don’t point out that their opening up to you. In my experience, pointing out that someone stopped doing a thing can trigger/embarrass them into continuing that habit. Also it can be seen as you picking on them, even if that wasn’t your intention. (For ex: “Oh wow you’ve spoken 5 sentences to me today, that’s a new record!” “You haven’t twitched in a while, you know that?”) If they open up to you don’t throw a party, act completely normal and that act alone can put them at ease.

[@DreamDear]

The GreenMachine Im the exact same way

[@adrianashamsuddin8190]

ah~ that hits home

[@Ianita]

As someone who sometimes goes mute when extremely shy or nervous, it’s the weirdest thing ever. I might want to talk and have words planned out, but opening my mouth is physically impossible, like my jaw is wired shut.

[@xxxhoodooxxx]

Symptom of social anxiety.

[@mkp1214]

I thought that was kinda everyone tbh

[@L-sillybrained]

oh that’s not???? normal?????

[@isthatawormwildbowreferenc4562]

@@L-sillybrained wait i thought it was🙂

[@SpiderTNT.]

@@xxxhoodooxxx mhm, if i remember correctly its seen as a whole separate disorder too right

[@NaNa_W4NT5_F3MNM5]

The bit about the book his mom gave was so wholesome.

[@ZzaKuro0o]

i almost cried, i wish i had that kind of support from my parents

[@Artix902]

Yeah, I got goosebumps

[@Cbelkster]

This legit made me go to amazon and buy my son some coding and web design books. I would've loved that as a child... And I know my son has a LOT of interest in the things I do, so if I can help facilitate that interest... I will. This actually really inspired me to help him!

parenting 101: fix the problem. Try to see the more positive possible solution. His mom is wise.

[@IceBreak23]

it was, same thing happen to me when i was a kid, i got my ps1 and after years it actually inspired me in become a game developer, yeah helping the kids in the early years really helps them to find their own path to the future

[@tomschirf1092]

So I'm exactly the kind of person who speaks more to hear themselves speak. I (rightfully so) have always gotten flack for this and am generally annoying to be around for most people because of it. But the way he just described that gave me a new way to explain why I do it. I hate having those thoughts bottled up in my head, and there's a weird itch to get them out into the air. It's the same reason I talk aloud to myself whenever alone.

[@hesseldv57]

I was watching the video and it sorta linked to me aswell and now reading your comment it truly made me realise i am also like this, why i also constantly talk to myself. I noticed i sometimes try to make the conversation about me so im trying to be a better listener as well. Cheers to knowing about ourselves and finding ways to improve!

[@ironhead1177]

lmao bruh I'll literally talk to myself for hours if I'm just at my house alone. It's weird and I think that's the first time I've ever mentioned it, but it's just been something I do. In fact, I probably talk to myself about half the amount that I talk to other people.

[@kadevohn]

Are you done? I mean really Tom, you can just go on and on cant you? It's a bit much. Obnoxious even.

[@ETGK]

It’s like a bit of Tourette’s

[@CyanicCore]

Have you ever thought about a journal? That or some sort of recorder can do good here

[@SengadApollo]

“But I wanna talk now” gave me chills

[@rafaelcordani3895]

_Zelda_ and chills

[@AxxLAfriku]

Let me get this straight: You comment something that is unrelated to the fact that I have two DANGEROUSLY DASHING girlfriends? Considering that I am the unprettiest KZbinr ever, having two hot girlfriends is really incredible. Yet you did not mention that at all. I am quite disappointed, dear sen

[@somerandomguy3298]

AxxL not you again...

[@martiddy]

@@AxxLAfriku what are you talking about bro?

[@cole3536]

@@AxxLAfriku Axll who even are you?

[@ryanxxxx7]

It hit me so hard when he said "I felt so.." and a lot of seconds passed and finished the sentence with "alone". :( Hope he is great by now.

[@randomscroller9347]

For someone who was a mute for 9 years, he's quite articulate

[@coleburns8397]

That just means you listen. I’d guess he listened well and by god, he is articulate, you’re right.

[@MrMpakobec]

Search channel named Tabbes. She speaks about been mute for 3 years - its pretty intresting, Also your would never think she was this kind of a person.

[@moss_piglet]

Idk I assume not talking a lot results in you thinking and internalizing things more

[@TB-mb6bo]

It’s not like he didnt have the mental capacity, he didnt have the emotional capacity, he said himself he still talked to some family and depending on how his brain works he probably talked to himself in his head quite a bit. He’d still be taking english classes and reading and writing and whatever else. My guess would be that its kind of like how a lot of people can learn a song just by listening to it a bunch of times, some people need the lyrics too, a lot of people need to sing the song a lot to get it right. It’s crazy how diverse the workings of the human mind can be in the simplest ways that we don’t think of. Just the fact that some people think and hear a voice in their head/clear images in their mind vs others not really being able to see/hear anything when they think. Bizarre

[@Little_Miss_Carrex]

@@veronicringe Speech therapy is not some magical thing that immediately gives you perfect pronounciations. (Source: have had speech therapy myself)

[@wheresthemedicine]

"The sort of person who won't accept that there are problems without people who caused those problems" hits me in an unusual way. These days I think a lot about subtlety toxic parenting. That kind of inability to notice what your kid wants to do and what they might struggle with, and just assuming they (or whatever it is they enjoy) is to blame for them not fitting into your idea of normalcy, or more particularly the fact that you can't connect to them. I was a very depressed kid and the aura of disapproval from people at the idea of spending a lot of time on a computer (ie not going outside), or wanting to avoid school, while being given no encouragement to my interests or what they wanted me to be, still lingers with me much much later.

[@MajorMoron]

Yeah man. Same. My mom always nurtured my love for video games and I connected a lot with them when I didn't really know how to look at the world or where I fitted in. But I wound up being taken from my Mom and given to my Dad, who is a great guy and I love him and he taught me a lot of valuable lessons, but him and my step mom spent a lot of time trying to crush and remove that part of me that loves video games and playing them, and I really didn't realize untill I watched this video that maybe that damage still lingers. I find quite often since I have been removed from that situation that I have a hard time getting into games, and my heart wants to get into them so bad, but something keeps getting in the way. And once in a while, I will find a game that sucks me in and I love it and I love the feeling of connecting with that world. But once it's over, I go back to having a hard time starting a new one. I'm doing it to myself right now actually, I have been meaning to play the PS4 Ratchet and Clank to get ready for the new one, and I have the disc in my console, ready to go, but I keep not sitting down and doing it. Psychological stuff is so nuanced and weird.

[@Skyisgoingbacktopluto]

Yeah. Nothing more tone deaf than your mom complaining about the parent characters in Bojack Horseman.

[@kyrauniversal]

My mother brought it to a point of putting me on antidepressants, and I was, but at the same time, a family member passed and I was stuck in a similar position. Even unable to go outside without the neighborhood kids manipulating me, and calling me Gullible. It was always Gullible. So for 8 years, I was getting into a situation like his, but more of an issue of being alone. I was ignored, but didn't care. Rarely speaking till I could trust people. I'm out of that mindset now but I still have trouble.

[@PikaPetey]

I love the lofi zelda music for the background. very fitting. Because link doesn't talk.

[@atlas4733]

the map and avatar also match :)

[@Blu-ray]

im glad zelda cdi isn't canon

[@bug_boy3210]

Whoa your here, surprised! :0

[@fleecky7011]

It fits perfectly

[@catalinamontesss]

*its all coming together now*

[@LogLordOG]

“Situationally mute”. I have struggled with social anxiety and the inability to form words in front of crowds for as long as I can remember. It pains me to the deepest part of my existence. Watching this video brings me a little bit of peace.

[@patchworkgolem]

I've hung out with people for hours, either one on one or in groups, and realizes after I left that I said like 2-4 sentences and a handful of 'uh huh' and 'yah me too's. I felt called out when he said that he surrounded himself with people that like to talk with like zero input. 😕

[@TheShadowcreator]

This is me! The selective mutism, the divorced parents, the friends who would "talk for me," The autism misdiagnosis...

[@snow-mh3lv]

TheShadowcreator yo, what’s your favourite word?

[@K3Vz0]

Same

[@zebnemma]

I have divorced parents too and my mom once said I became more quiet when they split. I was 6 so I don't even remember a talkative me, in my head I have always been shy. Why does divorce seem to mini-traumatize young kids? X'D

[@angelsarchive]

Is selected mutism related to having divorced parents? My dad left at a young age and I had the same thing, but I rarely knew him.

[@asuri5298]

Yeh same I just realized I was selectively mute after my parents seperated

[@bazbuco]

The 5-second pause between the word “felt so” and “alone” @ 9:33 gave me goosebumps.

[@RightyRonaldo]

I hated being the quiet one man, no quiet kid ever chooses to be the quiet kid

[@Vafo95]

Nah i was the quiet kid and i loved it

[@steliee]

yea.. :(

[@inactive859]

I was the quite kid and I didn't care cuz I'm like that

[@skwid7770]

I’m a quiet kid and it’s sometimes the best thing but sometimes it really isn’t

[@kermitmakarov1762]

C L O U D 🧢

[@Revelatus]

I'm generally pretty quiet in a professional setting unless I feel like I have something of value to add to a conversation. On the other hand, I cannot stfu around friends that I am really close with. I definitely notice a huge difference between how well I am listened to in those two situations, it's absolutely true. Related to this, I think *because* I only talk when I am confident in the value that my comment will add in a professional environment, people seem to think that I am smarter or more competent than I really am. But really it's just because they don't get to hear all the dumb nonsense that's going on in my head the other 90% of the time like my friends do.

[@shineeis5657]

That's tactful

[@fijimontessori5895]

those sentence starters make you sound smart tho, you should accept the complement that you are indeed smart guy.

[@09jadeen]

Wow, we are one in the same. Thats pretty cool, even down to people believing im more smart than how i feel.

[@twiggy1253]

I have the same issue, my main issue is the fact that I dont shut up around friends. Whenever I say something I always grow anxious and paranoid about if I am annoying.

[@blaiddyd9967]

Being a quiet person when you don't want to be is one of the most difficult things to navigate. I'm not mute, but I am extremely quiet and usually don't talk out of fear/anxiety. Being able to talk and socialize like a normal person is all I've ever wanted

[@Whywasthisadded]

Ikr, Idk what happened but last year I completely stopped talking, just out of no where, and I lost all my irl friends, some tried to talk to me still but they eventually gave up. im literally so insecure that I avoid talking to people bc I dont want them to look at my face, its getting to the point where I cant even talk to friends online, im basically mute at this point, the only people I talk to now is my family, its so awful, I really just want to be able to talk normally like I used to, or at least a little bit more

[@nyahnyahson523]

For the longest time I thought I talked a lot, as in, I thought I was loud, annoying, and obnoxious in how much I thought I was talked. When I started getting to know people online, it seemed like people weren't listening. I turned up my mic volume and suddenly people began to respond and talk to me more. I took this information, applied it to my rl life and realized, "Wait. I never talk." When I did talk I would often speak quietly, too quietly for anyone to hear. And I didn't realize that for maybe, 6 - 8 years of my life? From the age of 8 up to about 16 I was completely clueless that I had been doing this, always blaming myself for being obnoxious.

[@nyahnyahson523]

Additional Note: No one had ever told me that, like, ever. Even now, I pretty much go mute whenever there's more than 1 other person I'm talking to unless they're a close friend.

[@Litepaw]

Same here man. I can socialize and i can talk, but it's really anxiety inducing. I don't answer the phone though. I can be completely normal with strangers and random people, but it gets harder if I'm with a friend. I get more silent and more anxious the more i know someone. I don't know anyone else like that. I can go talk to random drug dealers or drunks without getting afraid, but i get really really anxious if a friend calls. Alcohol helps. 27yo. It feels like it never gets easier.

[@BolverkAtlasia]

My advice is to get into a service industry. Work in retail and just....watch how your colleagues talk to people. It rubs off on you. You start to pick up the knack for it and all of a sudden, you're booming with personality and things to say. It's really amazing.

[@runthebus]

Him saying he thought he broke character in preschool is the cutest most innocent thing I've ever heard

[@MissNicolaRose]

I'm a speech and language therapist, and hearing stories from the side of the person with communication difficulties, is so so valuable! I've only very recently started watching this channel but this one in particular I personally can't believe how valuable it was to hear.

[@frozi7711]

Hey hope it helps you help people like this doc

[@baraghy3627]

@Yougotnomilk best of luck to you m8 hope life goes our way

[@misterree]

Is it odd for someone to want to be mute? I'm almost 24 and the more I debate, the more I lean towards being mute. I've talked all my life, but I deserve to be silent when I choose.

[@lol70721]

nice :3

[@rotshepherd3817]

I'm a psychology student and this was very thrilling to listen to as well

[@kcmicofficial6412]

“You dont really choose to do anything at that age..your brain just kind of does it for you” amen brother. Never was able to understand any of that until i was much older❤️ hope you’re doing well

[@phatdookie4207]

I remember going to school with a kid who was selective mute. He would like talk to the teacher, some times, but we basically knew him as the kid who wouldn't talk.

[@reklin]

I had a mute student once. The weird thing was that I was working at a Kindergarten/Preschool in China that specialized in teaching English. Oddly enough, he was one of my best students and actually did really well.

[@phatdookie4207]

@@reklin that is cool. I was a substitute teacher for a short period of time.

[@hgards11gards96]

Gotta say man, what your doing is incredible. Bringing these topics we don’t typically think about, much less talk about, is really interesting. People often have this misconception that strangers who do odd things or have disabilities are just weird. Even though they may not say it, some people almost dehumanize them in a way. I’m guilty of this myself. but this concept of putting them in a “normalized” form and speaking to them really puts into perspective how they are the same as us. What your doing is extremely impressive and eye opening. Keep doing what your doing

[@Scumflxwer]

I, myself, was mute all the way up till 8th grade. I totally could relate to this guy when he says he would whisper whenever talking to the teacher. One time I was speaking to my friend and a guy in my class overheard and said “woah I never heard her voice before.”

[@bishcp]

The same exact thing happened to me, I would talk around my family, but once they found out I wouldn't talk to the outside world I went to speech therapy twice. I only spoke once publicly in 8th grade and everyone was blown away. I remember they all asked me questions afterwards to get me to speak more too

[@deltron4608]

Did u get that comment alot

[@michaelscott-joynt3215]

It's a uniquely awkward feeling when outspoken people say things like this. Once, in automotive class (more than just sitting at desks all day, you know), I was standing around with a group and one of the guys looked at me and told me he didn't recognize me at all. This was far into the semester. I'd been completely invisible.

[@geminiokra]

I’ve had a similar experience of being invisible to others. There was this one girl at my school that saw me in the hallway and seemed shocked seeing me there. I’d seen her around a lot but apparently she thought I left to go to another school 3 years earlier. At least she knew who I was but that experience was so incredibly surreal.

[@neuroticgazer176]

This resonates with me deeply, as I was selectively mute until I was around 15-16 years old, and I always remembered how my classrooms would get dead silent whenever I spoke. Being the quiet kid was a strange predicament, as I had a lot on my mind and wanted to say a lot of things to my teachers and people around me but couldn't get words out no matter how hard I tried. I could always talk my parents' ears off and talk to my brother fine, but strangers and some more distant family members were very difficult to communicate with. I performed very well academically all though school, though I had issues socializing with others and often only responded to people with hand gestures or facial expressions because it came easier to me. I started talking a little bit more when I hit grade 6 and started to make friends, though I usually either spoke very quietly or would only talk to them when there was nobody else around. As I got closer to high school I began talking more and ignored when people tried to make a big deal about me actually talking. By the end of high school I was still fairly reserved and had difficulty holding conversations with others, though working restaurant jobs here and there really helped me break out of my shell. While I am still quite quiet around new people for a while, when I'm finally comfortable around someone it's like opening a flood gate and I can't stop talking lol. TL;DR I was selectively mute until midway through high school and while I feel I have improved greatly, I still have issues every now and again regarding socializing.

[@samanthacooperstein5768]

I can’t believe he said he “had no say in the matter” and nobody acknowledged the amazing pun or play on words or like almost a metaphorical pun 😅 lol I died

[@alejandrodpg]

6:39

[@Devo57]

“It’s the closest thing to a sense without actually being a sense” Why did that blow my mind

[@CounteredSnow]

i'm not mute but i am pretty shy, i stutter when ever i talk to fast or if all attention is on me, get really anxious whenever i wanna ask for something (which normally just leads to me not asking), i have never been able to interrupt people or talk at the same time as people, i don't like talking on telephones and texting is sometimes really hard to do if it's not with a group of people i really know. i wouldn't say these things have like completely ruined my life or made it harder but it's nice knowing that other people out there have struggled with some of the same things even if it's to more of an extreme

[@pbarbarekos3060]

Wow I can relate to this on a whole nother level. It's like you're describing me.

[@walkerallen425]

You have just described my entire thought process when I'm in those situations. I've never related to something someone said more than this.

[@K3Vz0]

Are you a mind reader?

[@eurobeatintensifies5840]

I'm pretty much the same, you're not alone

[@nagato2519]

I was always shy when i was little, its getting better (im not afraid to say my opinion to older people or teachers etc even if it could make them angry) but I hate talking on the telephone as well, but its because i had hearing aids since i was about 6 years old and it was always hard to understand everything and it could get arkward very quickly if i didnt understand it. So yeah. Ur not alone

[@roach-419]

My family never tried to work with me with my muteness because they were anti doctor/ anti disorders and this really opened my world. Like it made me tear up to hear his story and I’m glad people have actually had parents who helped them with their muteness. I was curious as to if there’s a link to that mute discord server that he had spoken of. Loved the video

[@pbox1]

did u ever find it?

[@lecheffantome2868]

@@pbox1 no

[@slitherken9681]

I get called the "quiet kid" or "the school shooter" because I rarely talk in public, I talk a lot around my friends, just not in public often

[@inactive859]

Same

[@undercookedsalmonella2723]

Not trying to be rude but I've got some questions because I'm kind of curious 🤔. Have you ever dated someone, assuming you only talk to people you're comfortable with do you only respond if people force themselves to reach out to you. Lastly, why lol

[@DeezYoink]

Thats ducked up bro

[@fool4343]

that's so rude, hope you'll find better s o c i e t y

[@slitherken9681]

@@undercookedsalmonella2723 it's fine, questions are normal 😊. So first, yes, I have multiple ex-girlfriends and ex-boyfriends and I'm thinking about asking one of my friends out. Second, I'll talk to people who I'm not exactly friends with if they make the first attempt to start a conversation and I'll get more comfortable if I find out that we have mutual interests, like for example league of legends, but *they* have to start the conversation otherwise I won't talk to them even if I know we have mutual interests. Third and lastly, because I'm the kid that sits at his desk, dosen't talk, with his headphones on and listening to music, little do they know that I'm a genuinely sweet guy who cares for his friends dearly and wouldn't want to hurt someone unless I really have to.

[@raccmaster6054]

"My parents got divorced, pretty common" That just hurts man

[@Lori_P89]

I hate getting labeled the quiet one because it makes talking even harder, and if you're a girl...that "everyone shuts up and listens" super power never fucking happens. Not even if you're with a group of other girls. The only time people would actively listen to me was when I became president of the anime club in high school. People kinda had to listen though because I was talking about whatever we were gonna do that day.

[@shineeis5657]

I'm a girl too and it worked for me... I wasn't mute though, just a very quiet kid. Maybe you weren't speaking loud enough for them to hear you, but you thought you were. If you are used to hearing yourself speaking softly, it will sound loud enough to you but not others. Just my take.

[@zhanaronpasay2870]

Im a male and was also quiet when i was a kid. For me the "everyone shuts up and listens" superpower is quite accurate for me. When im trying to speak, one of my classmates who hears it shuts up the other students so i could speak up. Maybe shinee is right or you just have horrible luck in friends at the time.

[@qwertydavid8070]

Anime club? *when can I sign up*

[@Lori_P89]

@@qwertydavid8070 This was back at my high school, sorry man

[@alexiabarnes5371]

I relate to this because I’m a very quiet person at school and I pretty much only talk to my friends (which I only have 2 because I’m not good at making new ones lol). I would sit at the lunch table in middle school with all the normal, kinda talkative girls (they weren’t “popular” or anything) and stay quiet the whole time. When I finally found times to speak or when I had something to add nobody would listen and just keep talking over me. I would even try and get an individual’s attention or repeat myself. It sucked and even in high school I’m still quiet.

[@kasikfs]

i was mute for about 5 years and i was extremely bullied for that. i literally cried when i heard your story, I thought that I was alone in this shit, no one could understand me how i feel. im thankful for this video

[@dindjarrin8324]

Yep, your not alone

[@SengadApollo]

I’m glad he’s able to communicate verbally with others now 💕

[@sonnydarnell9545]

I was mute until I was 22(still had a job and lived on my own) only started speaking because one of my sisters was suffering from cancer, before one of her last surgeries she said she didnt want to die without hearing my voice so i spoke to her, she lived but after that I decided to start talking to people

[@fwuuton]

I was like this until only about three years ago, and the one thing that surprises my old friends when they see me again is how "chatty" i've become. All because my senior highschool classmates made it their mission to get me to open up in the two years before we graduated. They were all very loud people and i was the odd one out. They taught me to become confident and were patient and i genuinely had a lot of fun with them. I love every single one of them

[@Zircaa]

Sounds like a great group, loud and patient? haha

[@GameyRaccoon]

imagine having friends

[@shavvy9483]

@@GameyRaccoon you can have friends if you look for them, same with me i have and still got friends but because of my circumstances i don't hang out with them alot making them distance themselves of me

[@younghex9577]

Man that sounds like some good group of friends. Wish I had that.

[@forevershampoo]

Thats dope they looked out for you. As mean as kids can be its awesome when they look out

[@benstech726]

it's incredible how often I watch professional comedians and not really laugh, and this dude make me break out in laughter like 5 times. Hilarious dude, glad he's found his voice. It's worth listening to, and he's wise too.

[@aborboao]

I was/am selectively mute. No trauma, nothing.... That's just me. Just so you know that trauma isn't necesseary for that to happen. There are situations that up to this point (30yo) trigger it. I can relate so damn hard to the superpower thing he said, sometimes it's almost dangerous because people tend to take anything you say so seriously that even if you're just joking people might take everything as carved in stone.

[@Lakefish_HAXX]

I was selectively mute for about four years, too. Just one day decided "no you know what, too much noise. No talking." Now I talk on impulse, and want to go back to silence.

[@aborboao]

@@Lakefish_HAXX I can totally relate to that. Sometimes my mouth gets me into trouble and that's when I miss the silent days. Overall I think is about balance, but the adjustment tends to take a while I believe.

[@bebobee3013]

With great power comes great responsibility Peter

[@aborboao]

@@bebobee3013 Ben is a siege.

[@mryomens]

Usually being a quiet/shy kid and this happening demotivates speaking or having a small talk so often.

[@Neo-vc1ns]

The amount of cuteness this conversation gives off

[@lydia3598]

I've had Selective Mutism since I was probably around 13, when I was involved in an incident that gave me PTSD (family related, i don't want to go into it though), and I still very rarely talk nowadays (I'll be 19 in a month). I was a quiet kid even before all of it, but I didn't say anything *whatsoever* to anyone other than my mom and brothers for 3 years afterwards. Nowadays, I'm trying my best to talk to others, but it's still really difficult.

[@MoistyRain]

Good luck

[@justanub4697]

Good luck!

[@muraxity8820]

You can do it 💗

[@turtleofpride4572]

We believe in you

[@lydia3598]

thanks, everyone :3 i've been trying to talk people in vrchat instead of staying mute, and even though i haven't spoken to many strangers, i've been talking to someone i know pretty well, and i am getting better at it!

[@NVEmery]

Let's hand it to this guys mother. She noticed her kid wasn't normal, but still fueled his desires and loved him every step.

[@switchmeback]

ngl i got a bit choked up watching this. i've been selective mute since i was a kid and i can relate to a lot of what he's been through. Im glad he's more comfortable speaking now

[@Kimairan]

Same, actually.

[@bookscorpion]

good name

[@ovi5986]

Same here, like damn, it feels good that theres more awareness being spread about it. Teared up a little

[@EnuHarumonia]

I don't know if you still read comments on videos this old, but I wanted to share that: I'm a middle school foreign language teacher and I have a student with selective mutism. Even just by reading that sentence, I'm sure you can understand how difficult it can be for her (and me). However, she signed up to be in my class and wants to be there. I (coincidentally, as a subscriber) watched this video when it was originally uploaded and it really stuck with me because of that one student. Whether it was intended or not, I actually learned so much about selective mutism from this one video and I really think it helped me to understand the situation from the perspective of someone WITH mutism. While I can't think of one specific instance, I can tell you that having heard this story has made an impact on how I see that student and the few others we have at our school with this problem. The student of mine today has grown so much over the past couple years I've had her, to the point where today she was able to have a full conversation with me at normal volume. Not in a whisper, not after me prompting anything out of her, not her holding up a cue card with the word on it- she WANTED to talk to me and it immediately made me think of this video again. Anyways, I just wanted to tell you, the interviewee, and anyone else involved in your channel: Thank you. Even if it was unintentional, your videos have made an (albeit technically indirect) impact on that girl's life and I wanted you to know. I adore this kind of content and hope you continue to keep up the awesome work and channel!!

[@ross5425]

my younger sibling is selective mute and didn't speak their first words until they were around five and still didn't talk until they got to middle school in which they would have good and bad days regarding their mutism. I had to speak for them a lot, we would often joke we had a psychic bond since we are very close in age and we would always know what we're thinking. I would talk for them, order for them, went to their classes and presented their projects for them based on what they wrote me to say on paper. When i finished high school and wanted to move it was incredibly hard because I know they needed me, but they have been doing well so far. They still have bad days and sometimes even weeks of no speaking, but they have friends and their own little social groups. I never knew anyone else like them, this video reminded me of them so much. I miss em.

[@loganhudson961]

His bit on negitive feelings toward specific days of the week really resonated with me as I also had to leave or go to one of my parents houses on specific days and times.

[@tombarryexpresserino1279]

the people you get on here have so man damn good stories. Thank god you exist and these people have the chance to speak of there expieriences

[@ydmykelse7661]

"the worst thing about being mute for nine years is that everyone knows you're mute, and so how do you stop that" thats how ive been feeling for that past 4 years. ive been mute for so long, so will people still like me if i start talking? or will they think im weird? because I feel like people think im pretty weird whenever i truly act like myself around people (which ive only ever done online or when I'm with people like my mom, dad, or sister.)

[@eyekandi]

same. I only started talking freshman year when I got on medication. But I was still very lonely and no one every approached me. People who you already know will like you if you talk.

[@edie1707]

even if there’s a rough transition period if you start to speak again, it’s just a moment in time. it’s hard to shake off the opinions of others, but all that really matters is what you think about yourself. you’re allowed to take up space, to be heard, to be liked and disliked. ultimately, what other people think is none of your business. you could be jesus and someone would still hate you. it’s not your responsibility to please others. sorry for the rant. more things i need to hear for myself than anything

[@im_concerned9989]

''With a lot of cases like this, of Selective Mutism, there's sort of this misdiagnosis of being on the autism spectrum'' Me, with Selective Mutism and Autism: *ah*

[@thomasherrmann632]

AH

[@anecann]

I remember being a kid and trying my hardest to speak but there was like a barrier that prevented the words to come to the surface. It was like being underwater with infinite echoes of memories and sensations. Maybe that was the combination of autism, mutism and ocd.

[@youlostabetwithsatanandnow8592]

*Ah.*

[@neilronan444]

feeling this hard

[@WAVE0025]

@@anecann I have that same exact feeling right now, everytime I try to speak in front of a lot of people (like in class presentations) I feel like there is this weird thing that is preventing me from speaking loud, like I am underwater drowning, I end up having a low voice and everybody in the class would just scream "Make your voice louder" which does not help at all because it worsens that feeling of "drowning"

[@austinpoor5217]

I knew a selectively mute kid in highschool. I would structure conversations off of yes or no questions or questions he'd be able to answer in context. And I just remember telling everyone "he's not scared, he's not dumb, he just, has this switch. Talking is set to off and he can't turn it on." I don't remember why I thought that, but now a days he has no trouble talking, and tells me I helped him. It still feels like I shouldn't ask him about all that, so getting this perspective helps me understand a bit better what he went through.

[@paolo3794]

Vr chat is proof that everyone wants to be a cute anime girl.

[@zyloft2053]

Paolo :3 no, i dont

[@paolo3794]

@@zyloft2053 deep inside your heart you're an anime girl.

[@DocJamesH]

@@paolo3794 you wish

[@Raymond..]

It might not be for everyone, but everyone wants to do it at least once.

[@possiblespartan]

Impa best girl

[@lurtz8656]

this is legit the best end quote of any of these videos. My god, it triggered something significant in my brain. Much love.

[@tollburd1348]

I have had a situation similar to this that I'm still growing out of. During my time in 4th-8th grade I decided that I was better off being very quiet or not speaking at all in classrooms, to strangers, or in public. This video made me realize that I wasn't being weird or abnormal when I was doing that, and that there are others like me, and it's all a part of finding yourself. Thank you for sharing, Glacials

[@boiboi2505]

Listening to other peoples problems makes me feel so much better for some reason. I have no idea why but when I’m feeling depressed for bullshit reasons, and I hear things like this is calms me down a good bit, and makes me want to get out of whatever situation I’m in.

[@agathaknive3321]

I really like his voice, I could listen to him talk for hours.

[@alanfuad__]

*It's beautiful how we are the ones listening to him telling his story*

[@partypotry]

one of my earliest childhood friends was selectively mute... everyone around us at the time didn't know what it was & kept pressuring her to speak, othering her... in reality she was really funny and had a lot of interests... i'm happy this video was made, more ppl should know abt it

[@tashpiro01]

I still rewatch this every once in a while. Thank you

[@potatolord4094]

i like how well-spoken he is.

[@Diobeatease]

I stumbled upon your page a few days ago. I saw Winnie the poo and a dark title. It was a war story. It's amazing to hear all of these stories. Thank you so much for all of these!

[@justan0here603]

I know someone like this, the first and only words I have heard her say are thank you because I was handing people paper during art is elementary school

[@itslitgamestv6827]

This is the most I could relate than anything in my life. I have been situationally mute since 3rd grade and I am about to be a senior in high school. It is like I want to talk, and I definitely can, but my brain and throat are just like NO. I think I need to break out of my shell, and I'll probably have to at some point in life to lead a productive life. I've had people criticize my voice before and say things like "why do you sound like that?" My response is always like, "What do you mean? Sound like what? I am trying my best to talk as normally as possible!" I know now that I shouldn't let these things get in the way, nor should I care. I only know how to sound like me, that is it lol.

[@ZainIsInPain]

imagine being a substitute teacher and calling on this kid

[@potatopotato3284]

I can feel his pain :(

[@yukaniwifi69]

@@potatopotato3284 same

[@FastGunner2040]

It may seem ironic that he can talk now, but that's the goal. That's part of what makes it so hard to escape, because people will see you try to talk and assume that all of your 'talking issues,' were "fake."

[@animeargonaut3127]

This is my first time being so early to a Syrmor video and I feel empty with the lack of comments to read about the video while watching 😂

[@sakura9959]

Same 😂

[@Alexander_Grant]

Oh man, there is so much wisdom in that talking very little is a superpower and everyone listens. If you're just a part of a friend group that understand when you bring the serious voice, you're there to say something profound, it's incredible to listen to the silence. I've gotten to know my really good friends over the years that we can change our tone of voice and we know we're just talking to keep the silence away, but once someone changes the tone, everyone goes silent. It's so interesting to hear these stories.

[@itasty4089]

I always get so excited when I see your videos come out😂

[@jarlmaktoum7411]

Same

[@SagarSinghUK]

me too!

[@Josuh]

My mind isn't the only excited thing when i watch his vids 😳😳😳

[@macauleyward]

First time i've heard someone describe that exact lingering feeling of leaving your dad's to go back to your mom's, crazy how much people actually have in common even down to the littlest things

[@phatdookie4207]

4:46 damn. I just had every other weekend with my dad. I lived with him while I was in highschool for a while too though.

[@plederfagella9774]

Ur parents live(d) in different towns right?

[@phatdookie4207]

@@plederfagella9774 some times. My dad moved a lot.

[@kreelu2864]

I had a mute kid in my middle school, he whispered to me once in Spanish class. I remember being very happy and excited. I hope hes doing well.

[@Slip0824]

I was heavily abused until I turned 16. I was isolated from family and friends for so long that once I got out of that house I was pretty much a mute. But for me it was because I had no social skills and had no clue how to respond to people. It's been 8 years since I left that house and I'm still working on my identity. It's a hard thing to do. Props to this guy.

[@pencilbobby50]

the little big fact that you gave about anxiety completely blew my mind, because only until recently i learned that i had anxiety and i am 16. i am sitting in my bed wondering wtf is anymore ahaha.

[@bonbon_1729]

The difference between the mom’s and dad’s approaches to the dude being on the computer a lot goes to show that enouraging one’s hobbies go a long way.

[@ancientbuns6770]

I just like being quiet, but ya when I speak it basically halts the conversation with my friends

[@alexandrapetersen8582]

This guy is one of the most fascinating people I’ve ever seen! His personal growth is so commendable. When I was 4 my parents also divorced and it was really messy for awhile. I developed social anxiety and later on in life, full blown anxiety, I’m 20 and I’ve just recently started to get a grip on things and my life. I’m attending a fashion college in September and I’m working on committing to friends since I have trouble responding to people over text and phone call. You’ve come so far and you inspire me to tackle life head on instead of constantly shying away from opportunities. (I’m not mute, I’m just very anxious and shy)

[@policeofficer7655]

i'm happy to hear that, I hope to say the same for myself one day. I've been a recluse for about 6 years unfortunately

[@alexandrapetersen8582]

Police Officer you got this buddy! And always remember you’re not alone, we are in this together!! ❤️ You’re doing a huge thing just speaking out about it! Baby steps, I’m proud of you

[@alexandrapetersen8582]

Police Officer and also remember there is absolutely no pressure, take things at your own pace. It’s ok to be who you are, and if you would rather avoid people then that’s ok too! I hate society’s look on people who are more socially distant. Some of us are the most caring people in the world and we just need acceptance

[@McSwaggerMuffins]

The hair analogy is a lot like what it feels like trying to come out as trans. Very cool interview

[@Nye209]

i has the same speach therapy thingy because i had moved around so much with different languages, by 7 i had just no clue how to speak and after a while my s' where the thing i could still not pronounce! but after staying in one place it's truly amazing how adaptive our brains are to be able to hear something but never do it but still be completely capable of doing that thing

[@Thehopsalot]

Thank you so much for this post! I struggle a lot with talking and relate so much. The identity part had me emotional. There really are parts of me that I can overcome, but I'm just playing a character and choose not to

[@evanever]

I relate to this guy a lot even though I was never mute. That whole dynamic of divorced parents where one nurtures without judgement and yet the other finds endless things to blame for what's _wrong_ with you; that loveless atmosphere that their house takes on. As the quiet kid, it became inevitable that I would slip out of any friend group without them even noticing my absence. Then, when I was around 16, I stopped having friends entirely and it was only at that point I began to grow as a person.

[@Dr.Sho_Minamimoto]

It’s such an odd feeling relating to this story, I normally keep quiet or to myself due to various reasons. One part is my parents where not exactly the most nurturing and led me to have difficulty with the “rules” of conversation, if I said something they did not like- I’d be beaten shitless, if I stayed quiet- same thing. Basically anything I did not do perfectly on the first try would make me a punching bag. I could still speak proficiently but, I could not bring myself to be actively vocal as school, home, and “society” actively punished me for speaking and led to issues with trust. One odd side effect of this was I learned Sign language a hell of a lot easier then those who could speak. Also the part where he talked about being on the computer, I had a similar issue. My parents would choose easy targets for why I was the way I am, it was not because of their abuse and their selfish actions no, it was certainly video games, certain TV, computers, books they did not like, and the “Deaf and Dumb”- they were the reason I was such a *absolute failure of a human being* . Either way, it’s good to know I’m not alone in how I feel.

[@kiwirain1235]

Dude, I know I'm a stranger but for real if you need to vent

[@dakedres]

I relate so heavily with that mother, father, sister dynamic--the issue at hand being Aspergers & ADHD rather than mutism of course

[@rileyschrader8285]

This brought back some memories I forgot about myself where I would choose to go mute for a while without realizing it and only talking when I had to, I think part of it was just me not knowing anyone to talk to other than family.

[@themurrrg4705]

Honestly. I have no idea why your content popped up on my feed. But it’s the best thing I’ve found on KZbin for as long as I can remember. Thank you for having such an awesome idea and finding some incredible people to talk to 👏🏼👍🏼

[@uperz8411]

I don’t think I’ve ever connected to someone as much as when he started talking about the days of the week and not liking to be at one house AND THE COMPUTER THING

[@wyattmason8838]

The "superpower" he was referring to also works with almost never swearing to be sure you can use it when you need to make a point

[@Aeroductile1]

i went to college with a guy who was selectively mute as a kid for like 3 years. he just stopped talking one day around age 6 and started again around age 9. chatty guy now, very musically talented, didn't know what had caused it he just stopped one day.

[@OlaSax-gz7qo]

This guy's speech at the end inspired me

[@elliotstname2709]

when i was a kid around like 6 or 7 one day during school I told all the kids by writing on a piece of paper i was going to try to be mute, but like a few hours later i forgot and i said something and everyone was like dude you talked and i was like aw man

[@kuromew3489]

This channels so good God being able to get ur life ur trauma out without being ridiculed or attacked back and vr just makes it so much easier cause if things get bad u disconnect not big deal like this is amazing

[@emberdt7998]

Gosh. I had a mute friend in a class in elementary school. I think he had selective mutism. All the kids teased him but I befriended him. I offered him snacks and we sat together alot, I even got a laugh out of him once. Never seen the kid since though because we moved alot when I was a kid

[@BolverkAtlasia]

I was extremely quiet for most of my life. I wasn't selectively mute or anything, I was just always afraid to say the wrong thing. I wasn't sure how to relate to people. Fast forward 20 years and now I'm an extremely talkative social butterfly. It's weird how it works out. Glacials, I'm proud of you for getting through this. You've become the most amazing storyteller.

[@FeyrinVR1521]

He went on into a perfect few details A perfect few reasons Stories that were experiences. Knowing that he put himself around friends or people in general that he knew probably wouldnt understand him can be difficult yes, but its a huge step forward. I went through a lot of the same experiences, or obstacles that he did, and put it in context that was easy to understand. He also really has good points with just talking about the differences, like autistic spectrum which Im on and have dealt with my entire life. Being able to somewhat still be normal on the basis of education, and peers.. and still be okay in certain circumstances. even in his family situation... was the slightly the same as mine. The relationships between parents and or a sibling.. a mother blaming herself but trying to help. The speech parts with having to shape and fix vowels.. Was the exact same for me, the exact same S structures not sounding right.. Selective mute friends or fully mute friends through VR. Being able to see if you have social anxieties, still being normal within certain aspects or otherwise.. he never let anyone judge him or critize and it is extremely powerful to not be affected by others > straight forward thoughts & Opinions. this video hits Extremely close to home and I would reccomend sharing this video like I just did to a few people that never fully understood me..

[@Professor__Cow]

OMG FINALLY Someone who had the same type of divorced living schedule when they were a kid as me. My dad lived 10 mintues from my mom. I'd get up at one house, go to school, then go home to my dad's house, and repeat this all school week. It was the worst. Too much instability for a 10 year old.

[@masterstealth11]

For someone who didn’t speak for 9 years, he speaks very eloquently

[@thisiswhatitsliketobreath]

You know he can still listen right...

[@gabe0628]

@@thisiswhatitsliketobreath he is very eloquently spoken

[@coreym162]

mutes are listeners and observers. Doing so allows us to notice the small stuff that everyone is too loud to hear and see.

[@hotsuope]

He would talk to his siblings and parents.

[@testhekid]

@@coreym162 not like it's different when ur not mute.. i get annoyed by usually loud noises for example people talking, so i whisper loudly in a way that's very comfortable for me and the person i'm talking to

[@EyacuaTV]

The ending talk was just fantastic. We are just chains in this endless thing that life is. Man, i found this channel 3 days ago and I just can't stop finding myself reflected here and there in every video. I guess we are just people.

[@surogou2714]

selective mutism sucks ass dude trying to just not be mute anymore is so much harder the longer you wait, i feel like ill always be socially stunted because of how long i waited

[@tylerl3905]

Watching these videos is making me a more empathetic person and i appreciate that.

[@madude007]

i mean yeah when youre a kid and your parents get divorced you feel like you loose stability so chosing to be mute could be justified

[@datBean]

A year ago or so, I lost a friend, and I had almost like episodes? Of selective mutism for a few hours at a time. I didn't rlly understand it but I just couldn't make myself talk. It's kinda refreshing to know that that's a ligit thing, that I wasn't just overreacting or underreacting or anything

[@johnnycranknose4098]

I don’t know why but the “Dude... Ben just talked...” got me. I laughed really hard.

[@jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj0]

You know.. parents really don't always know better. My parents used to unplug the computer randomly because they thought i was always just messing around. Now I'm a software dev as well and love my job.