What is Loneliness?

Exploring Life's Biggest Questions with Andy Puddicombe | In an empty corner of a quiet boat on Lake Powell Andy dives into loneliness. What is it? Why do we feel lonely? How do you deal with it?
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[@lyndaossi9191]

Andy, you are a remarkable person. I wish I could sit and talk to you in person. My beloved husband of 50 years died last August. What you said about sitting with the loneliness and being present with it hit me in a very deep place. Thank you so very much.

[@rebeccasalkeld1033]

Hi Lynda, with reading your comment I just wanted to wish you well, I hope times haven’t been too rough for you. God bless

[@millaspuffs6744]

Yes, indeed 💛

[@danlamorte7494]

I am sorry for your loss, i hope you are doing well

[@JustineAdlong]

Hi Lynda. Thanks for sharing part of your story. Peace be with you.

[@jemygdio]

7 years as a client! And counting! It's a pleasure to have Andy as a friend! Hugs from Brazil!

[@kdasilva100]

It’s novel to see Andy outside of a recording studio. I love the reflections and contemplations that you share. It gives thoughts a more neutral nature. Thanks for all your work! 😊

[@avrilarteagapuente2701]

I don't know why I am crying listening to Andy's voice right now...I feel a special connection since the first time I discovered Headspace. It is true...thank you all!! I love every single video, animation, audio in all your platforms.

[@GrattanHillSettler]

I should've watched this instead of attending my counseller; three sessions with her and I still feel more benefit from watching this video.

[@hamzimgluck5230]

therapy is still important. if you think your counseller is not so great then change him. go to another counsellor. but don't try to deal with it alone.

[@kndavidenko]

I cannot explain how grateful I am for what you're doing, for that peace of mind you're helping to achieve. Thank you, Andy.

[@Genny-Zee]

I’ll gladly cry with you Andy, that’s what makes me feel less lonely ❤️

[@jedidahmilapo2251]

So used to hearing Andy's voice on the app i kept closing my eyes during the video lol default mode

[@Betcsbirds]

Thank you so much Andy for this... it really helped me pinpoint where to go with my loneliness.

[@DianaHernandez-fe9io]

I prefer to be alone than to be with somebody doesnt value me and in the middle of nowhere or in the middle of lot of people you can feel lonely

[@hawaiigeneral3045]

That’s so true!! I agree

[@ashleebartels29]

Ive never considered loneliness this way. Thank you for bringing a new perspective

[@LoganLovell]

I'll be in Lake Powell all Spring break here in about a week to lead a kayaking trip:) itll be pretty cool to know I meditated in the same area that the person who taught me was at some point!

[@ThisIsWellMalik]

Very important subject! Weird to see Andy for the first time after using this app i feel he's part of me and i wanna hug him its a crazy feeling

[@sophiebell5331]

Thank you so much for this video and explanation. I feel lonely cos of a break up, and what lies beneath that. I now understand it.. it's still there. The fear.. the pain..but it's not as scary or as brutal as I thought or felt before.

[@jmdeking]

I understand your pain, you are not alone. I hope youre doing well.

[@soulsis6562]

Hey Andy, thank you so very much for this🤗 I’m too emotional to explain my gratitude for you & this video. Ps I cried with you when you got emotional & felt I was absolutely with in that moment of pain/emotion.. big 💗

[@Chris81124]

Thought provoking and something I struggle with. I feel like I am a lonely person, I can be alone and am usually content alone, but what I hate and struggle with is an inability to make or maintain any real or good friendships especially outside of family. And I feel ridiculous, I have a wife, she is my best and only real friend. I have family on my side and hers, but outside of family, it is lonely. Is it introversion, is that a mentality, am I boring, do I drive people away or self sabotage. I am jealous of people with good friend groups and confidence to make new friends. And it’s scary to think that there are people out there who have good groups of people around them, but within those groups a person could feel alone. My sadistic measurement is, if I died tomorrow, outside of blood relatives who would be there. Anyhoo I’m rambling, I just wanted to throw down some thoughts and think. Thanks for the inspiration to think, and appreciate the problem isn’t always the problem, it’s how we view and treat the problem.

[@3leggedsharkkickssurferinballs]

Hey. Personally, I think introversion is a healthy thing. I'm fairly introverted myself, and I'm glad of it, because it means I- unlike a lot of people I've met- most definitely will NOT put up with toxic/ unhealthy "friend"ships just for the sake of avoiding solitude. I go for quality over quantity! And If I have to choose between superficial chit-chat and solitude, I'll choose solitude, because I've never found solitude lonely. Maybe that's because I grew up very connected to nature, with not many other people around, so it feels "normal" and peaceful to me. I realise this isn't everybody's experience. Remember that Loneliness and solitude are two VERY different things. Loneliness ( and I'm quoting Carl Jung here) is not caused by lack of human company, but by *not being able to communicate the things that are important to us* . This speaks so loudly to me, because it's usually amongst groups of people that I actually feel lonely. Perhaps you relate to this? If so, no need to worry. It's only because you value the *quality* of the connection over the *quantity* . This is a healthy thing! It's why you have a wife whom you are able to consider your best friend. I think it's beautiful ( and NOT ridiculous!) that you have a wife that you consider your best friend. That is what I'd love in a partner! I suspect that many others envy this too. Sure, some people are genuinely just very social beings. They are who they are, and that's ok. But you are who you are too, and that's equally ok! Not everybody with a buzzing social life is as happy as you might think. Some people surround themselves with other people; distractions; buzz- as a way of avoiding themselves; their truth; their authenticity. So long as they keep avoiding their true selves and remain dependent on others to define who they are, they will never learn to trust themselves let alone know themselves. I suspect that THIS would definitely make a person feel lonely. That kind of loneliness simply cannot be cured with indiscriminate human company. Please be glad and happy with yourself that you're able to discern a meaningful connection from a superficial one. I'm trying to not come across too preachy here, but please try not to compare yourself with others. I feel that this comparison might be what is exacerbating the feelings of "loneliness". Nobody's life is ever quite what it looks like on the surface. Instead of envying those people that you think are so lucky to have such social lives, try to appreciate the wonderful family connections you speak of here. They are so precious! Not everybody has those. Maybe try to spend some time in nature, too ( if you don't already). I've had some truly amazing, expansive moments when surrounded by nature. I can't explain it with words, but it's like I *find* myself by *losing* my*self* . Anyway. Sorry for the loooooong comment! Your comment just reminded me of how I felt not so very long ago. I just wrote what the me-back-then really needed to hear! I hope I didn't offend you in any way. I wish you all the best, regardless! Peace.

[@jenniferjones6898]

I go through the same feelings of loneliness. I see all these great friend groups and I don't have that either. I try but I too wonder if I drive people away by choice or just my personality. My loneliness is different because I don't have a significant other so I am also alone most of the time.

[@nederberg2331]

Its nice that your wife is a good friend to you, I would love to have such a relationship, I can only hope...

[@HLW2282]

@@3leggedsharkkickssurferinballs This really helped me, thank you

[@HLW2282]

I can really relate! You are not alone in feeling this way... best wishes to you

[@Infinityflowyoga]

We get to feel the extent of practice of someone with their presence. A lot of the times it’s just THEM that brings comfort and the courage to continue this journey of self realization. Thank you 🙏

[@AL_EVOz]

These videos of Andy outside with nature is so powerful. Thank you so much for these videos and to show that we are not alone. :) mediation has helped me so much.

[@joannaw9586]

Huge fan of Andy. Great help with understanding loneliness and be free with my mind and reconnect with the world.

[@aaronharwick8885]

Amazing talk, Andy. Thank you so much for all you have done. Just thinking about all the people you’ve helped and it fills me with such joy. Take care.

[@mariamakhzoum3898]

I love to listen to you, your voice is very soothing and the way you explain how anxiety works has thought me all I need to know to deal with it. I’m deeply thankful 🙏🙏

[@flourwillfly1445]

Andy is a remarkable person ❤️

[@bzzzvzzze]

Thank you Andy for everything you have done ❤

[@VenaSera-zf2di]

I'm grateful to have listened to you Andy! Thank you for being an Inspiration in my life🙏

[@marianalara8770]

It is fun how we claim "I rather be lonely than with somebody that... xxxx"... I do not know how truth that could be. I just end up a relationship and despite I am glad It is over I am also facing a lot of new emotions and confusion inside of me. I don't feel lonely cuz I am always doing something or I am always with someone else but indeed I am scared of feeling "loneliness".. and in those moments when I am alone by myself I start missing my ex couple just because of that free time that I am experiencing and the fear of not knowing what to do!! But I am glad to hear that I am not the only one with this kind of situation and I knew it was a process but is awesome that my meditation guru is talking to me thought youtube.

[@fruddix]

Much needed video right now. This should have much more views!

[@jwilsss]

Thank you 🧡 words and emoji’s can’t express the gratitude for your guidance

[@susanflowers1195]

I like listening to these videos. Loneliness brings you to this kind of stuff, But thats OK. It makes you come to the realization how peaceful and

[@TheBlackSheepDiaries]

Love this video! As a sailor, and very interested in this topic for many reasons, I really enjoyed this. Beautiful scenery and message. Thank you.

[@Carz6]

Great video. You can see on the cliffs surrounding the lake how much the water has dropped in the current drought. This adds an unexpected dimension to the video.

[@kforest2745]

Beautiful background and nice to see these long videos thank you for sharing. Never been lonely my spirit is nature’s I didn’t grow up in a market that’s been the difference for me. The algorithm keeps feeding me loneliness, I can only assume it’s lonely lol And celebrate life nothing less even when it passes give it the respect of moving forward and living.

[@paulthompson6832]

K Forest love your profile pic btw x

[@kforest2745]

Paul Thompson That little thing? Well it’s actually a mock of what I saw as typical but I love the universe anyway lol

[@paulthompson6832]

K Forest yes that little thing. Im going to subscribe to your channel because of its beauty x

[@blooberization]

Andy loving the content mate, keep safe

[@eman6784]

Loneliness is a way to give space to know yourself. People who do not like being alone is just that they do not want to know about themselves. They rather talk to someone else. Finding happiness of another person will only lead to a rabbit hole; happiness starts within yourself. Even after a breakup, what's there left is yourself, you will start to find yourself doing what you love. I have gone past this period of my life of loneliness at a young age, it made me strong emotionally, I am very intrapersonal now. I guess I could say I became "aware" to act and feel at every moment of interaction.

[@cipactli727]

Very well said

[@kaziquefly]

You might feel lonely, because you basic human need for a TRUE connection, for being SEEN and understood is unmet.

[@alelectric2767]

Loneliness is the price you have to pay to stay away from toxic people.

[@siennabay]

So true, and well said.

[@kwanda6941]

Thank you so much headspace I really appreciate you helping others and me . 😁

[@appetites_and_delights]

You are really good at what you do. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🙏🏼

[@ricardoguevara3317]

Thank you Andy🙏

[@benjoestrella20]

I really needed this today. Thank u 😭😭😭

[@Humble2348]

I truly love being alone , it's when I can truly connect with God and ask for forgiveness for all my sins. When I'm around people I find myself somewhat putting on a mask and not being myself trying to fit in. Keep praying people god is real and he loves you ❤

[@beautifull3781]

Amen

[@appetites_and_delights]

You are the type of human being I would love to be friends with… 😌

[@JJ-tp4lv]

A beautiful speech X

[@Sadami97]

If you could have a meal with anyone, dead or alive, who would it be? Andy Puddicombe please 😃🙏🏽

[@yagottapaythetrolltoll3127]

released right before quarantine lol. Perfect time

[@shaikhasameerah5749]

Am gonna totally subscribe you are my type kinda person. ❤️I enjoyed this conversation.

[@wondergirl3485]

Thank you 🙏🏽

[@nostalgic_blue]

The antidote to loneliness is finding like-minded people to connect with.

[@MrBlacksford]

16:18 Andy, what did you experienced that few seconds?

[@harjireza]

Paweł Blakiewicz his sister passed away some time ago, a drunk driver hit her..,May she continue to rest in eternal peace.

[@MrBlacksford]

@@harjireza oh man.. I'm so sorry for Andy. He is a living proof that meditation doesn't take away your emotions and change you to some kind of zombie. Thx for reply. Andy if you read this - take care. And thank you for your hard work on headspace👋

[@Pritam750]

Love andy wisdom...

[@trbnlennart8617]

such a nice video

[@katerinapini4399]

Be at bee so simple, be at beat of pathos

[@abhipatil4844]

Good one Andy

[@marc8935]

Such great videos !!

[@cathychase663]

you are amazing

[@freeMinder]

how do you name your thoughts and let of the sadness when that is all you have left of a loved one?

[@pinksparkle1965love]

Thank you))

[@g19m75c]

Why does it seem like when we feel painful feelings that we think or feel we have to move quickly away from that faster than we should?...

[@Jerrybk6]

g19m75c it’s a natural response to pain. Pain aversion. In other words, you would take your hand off of a burning stove pretty damn quickly

[@g19m75c]

@@Jerrybk6 ya I can see the physical reason but the feelings are different right?

[@appetites_and_delights]

I long to be nowhere…completely silence

[@MrGluey666]

The need to want to share little things and talk to a person

[@mccbatista]

The ideas seamed very interesting but I could not focus on the because I felt the back ground noises rather disturbing

[@snakedogman]

Yeah, not the ideal recording setup. But still nice environment.

[@snakedogman]

When you talk about an emotion do you mean just the sensation in the body?

[@mrAZcardinal]

Woah weird, I was at Lake Powell last weekend. Say whaaaat

[@aaronramsden1657]

If I ever have a son, I'm going to call him Andy

[@JEffigy]

In Japan in the spring we eat cucumbers ☀️💛🙏😊

[@javyassassin13]

Oh Utah my state

[@md.saifulbegnes9001]

Good vdio

[@user-tv8si4mn6k]

I feel loneliness comes from lack of purpose

[@susydyson1750]

I love aloness

[@ryantheblockhead]

Me.

[@kateam1975]

it nice but remember he is not a lone person this man has a lot of help and support and I it just I so it nice but take with a grin of salt

[@rose6424]

😢

[@toutestpossiblegm7007]

xoxo...

[@anointingimoudu688]

Why am I watching this?😂

[@wheres_wolfie]

Does fjallraven sponsor this company or

[@charityferguson5990]

🌙🙏⚘🌜

[@AlexPouliotte]

Yyyaaayy

[@misshaz1331]

are you married?cause i want to marry you :)

[@dickottel]

dude I bet you have a partner and friends, you know nothing about loneliness

[@snakedogman]

Well, he said he kinda felt something like loneliness once, lol. Still what he says is true.

[@user-qd6hs3xi1t]

He lived in a monastery in a silent order. I bet he felt quite lonely.