Here's What Stopping Self Sabotage Looks Like [An Example]

[@MedCircle]

Enjoying this interview? This is just one episode of a full series! Get instant access to the rest HERE bit.ly/3isMra3

[@dailydoseofmedicinee]

One of the most common reasons for binge eating is an attempt to manage unpleasant emotions such as stress, depression, loneliness, fear, and anxiety. When you have a bad day, it can seem like food is your only friend.👍

[@bitterapple]

I tend to overeat when I am angry. It's my method of self-harm. Fortunately, I have largely eliminated this trigger. My current worst trigger is feeling lonely and hopeless.

[@wolfcub824]

If you are overeating highly glutenous foods or drinking lots of milk, you might have a mild Opioid reaction to those two things. Just found out that is why I couldn't stop eating them. 😳

[@kateapple1]

No, it’s all control. I can’t control some things or feel out of control and food is the one thing I can control.

[@EmbodyYourDivinity]

I used to have all of this going on - eating over uncomfortable feelings - positive and negative ones, eating for a sense of control. But I also just ate and overate for no seeming reason. What I discovered was that food was an external source of ease and comfort for me so when I felt any internal dis-ease or discomfort, I'd go to food. Grateful that I got free of all of that over a decade ago. Today I enjoy food but only eat when I'm hungry and I naturally stop eating when I get full.

[@Dr.JudeAEMasonMD]

Dr. Ramani has kind of become my surrogate maternal attachment figure. I’ve never met the woman, but she has helped me access, understand and begin to process my gaping mother wound. She’s so safe, on a deep primitive psyche level, at least as she exists on this platform, my brain perceives her as safe.

[@ramyamaddali703]

I know what you mean cos i feel the same.

[@bex3425]

Ditto😘

[@michaeldingman9029]

Yes, My Girlfriend hae this PARTICULAR PROBLEM, early in her Growing up her Mother basically avoided her and tried to Shape her Into a PERSON, that She did not want to be..So her Mother kinda BASICALLY avoided her, or *( Ghosted )* her and my Girlfriend In the overall teenage girl years, did not, recieve much of ATTENTION what so EVER. Than when her Mother died of cancer, she was very Angry and upset. So she started very much over eating, to a very BAD Point, *( then while at her School )* She became the victim of very Bad *( Bullying )* about her size, that SHE was Effected very Greatly!! She was Mentally Messed up because of the BEHAVIOR of her Mother & also because of the Over EATING & the APPARENT Bullyingat School and other Places. She was So Mentally Messed up, and her Father was not really In that Great.kinda of SHAPE EITHER, She and HER FATHER, Committed *( A No, No, and Had SEXUAL RELATIONS together, *( I am Believing, because My Girlfriend was Very much Austrasized, by her Iwn Mother and She really Felt very much ALONE by Herself.)* Also Her Own Father, was Experiencing Very Much Loneliness, and *( Was not Very Stable )*, Himself.

[@meerschweinchenn]

my parents raised my siblings and i on really unhealthy food. a trip to the grocery store meant coming home with donuts, oreos, poptarts, popcorn, ice cream, etc. despite their part in this, we were shamed for our weight and eating habits. there were so many instances my dad would see me grabbing cookies and he'd say, "you might as well glue those to your hips cause that's where they're going." or he'd jiggle my stomach and exclaim, "dang you're getting chubby!" this lead to me binging and binging and binging at any opportunity when i would be alone. instead of snacking on a couple cookies, i began obsessively eating rows and rows of cookies followed by ice cream with poptarts broken up in it followed by pizza in a short period of time. i'd eat just a little bit when we went out to eat, and then i'd binge the leftovers when no one was looking. long story short, i developed an ED as the years went on and dropped to a very low weight and was obsessively working out. this lasted years and my parents PRAISED my weight loss, not realizing how i was obtaining it. whenever i 'recovered' from my ED, i would binge. this was a cycle. starving, binging, starving, binging for years and years. there's no in between for me. i either go to the grocery store and check food ratings and read every label of every item i buy or i go to the store and come home with 6000000 calories of snacks. i finally 'recovered' for the millionth time and i've steadily been a binge eater for the past 5 years. an ED is for life, whether it's binging or starving. for example, i'm currently on day 3 of a stomach bug and all my brain is thinking is "look how much better you look when you don't eat. look how skinny you're getting. even when you feel better, you need to eat way less and get thin again." it's a constant battle between my binging brain and my starving brain.

[@ebakes]

took me a couple reads to connect that ED is eating disorder not erectile dysfunction haha - I think I heard it somewhere that disorder is not really the right term because it's just an *unhealthy relationship* with food or whatever else. It might be your most consistent outlet and maybe even the only form of expression that you felt safe or confident in doing on one of these videos they said it's finding your emotions and accepting and negotiating with them honestly and openly you might be the person that makes a 100% efficient solar panel or cures aging and cancer maybe everyone is if there's a good enough societal shift towards wellness over short-term work output

[@meerschweinchenn]

@@ebakes i would 100% consider it a disorder. it's not "just" an unhealthy relationship with food. it's almost like an addiction, like a drinker who quit but struggles to be around alcohol or people drinking because that voice is begging to give in. for instance, i've been recovered for the most part for a few years. i just had surgery and suffered a bit of throat trauma from intubation. this made it SUPER difficult to eat/drink the past week. my brain? "this is the perfect opportunity to starve yourself." "maybe you'll lose weight not eating." "you don't need to eat." "weigh yourself now and see how much you weigh in a few days." i had to force feed myself with terrible throat pain so i wouldn't fall back into my ED, while reminding myself that i need nutrients to heal from this surgery. i physically hesitated when putting food up to my mouth because that voice was telling me to give in. when your mind obsesses for hours/days on end and tries to convince you starving yourself is a way better idea than eating properly so you HEAL from surgery properly... that's a disorder.

[@ebakes]

@@meerschweinchenn I appreciate your distinction and respectfully acknowledge your sense of phrasing and openness on the matter. The word disorder has always bothered me no matter when it's used just because it feels unnecessarily reductive. Why not lean into talking about your thoughts feelings or behaviors in a way that affords you more comfort and less shackled by the thought of "disorder". I've thought a lot on this and welcome the fact that everyone will have their own way that works best for them. That's phrasing it lightly 'uhealthy relationship' to let you pull yourself out of the negative/shameful cycle and then there's phrasing it clearly 'disorder' to give you a clear frame of mind - what's important is quality of life

[@tanyabrown9839]

EDs do not have to be for life. They can be resolved if the very root of the disorder is resolved, the reason why they are so often not resolved is that that is not dealt with. "whenever i 'recovered' from my ED, i would binge." You have not recovered from it at all if you are binging. You will not be recovered till you fix the underlaying causes of it. I'm currently working on getting rid of what causes me to binge, in my case it's inner anger and self sabortage (I havent figured out all the reasons why I self sabortage and will probably do some therapy to figure that out). My parents also programmed me as a child to eat the whole meal so if I buy a pizza I feel like I have to eat the whole lot of it It's extremely hard for me to leave any as as a child I got into trouble for doing that and told "think about the starving children who have no food and here you are wasting it". I was also forced to eat healthy stuff "you must eat your brocolli!" or spinach (so I'd eat it that mush while trying not to throw up that discussing stuff so that has turned me off completely as an adult to eating healthy salads and greens. I dislike green foods). Im using subliminals and hypnosis to reprogram my mind and the other for the first time, yesterday I actually enjoyed eating a plan salad. I enjoyed it so much that I started eating it out of the packet. My parents as a child also programmed into me.. unhealthy food for treats "If you are a good girl we will get KFC", so Im prone to doing comfort eating and they also always went on about money and not wasting that. So if I buy one pizza and have it delivered, I feel a need to buy two to save delivery fee at a later date of getting another but then I end up eating both as I cant leave food for later. We are full of programming from our parents since we were children and that is often what we need to get rid of to heal ourselves.

[@meerschweinchenn]

​@@tanyabrown9839 what you're not going to do is tell anyone whether they've healed or not based on /your/ subjective perception of what "healing" means. that bullshit is patronizing, dismissive, and pretentious. i may binge occasionally and eat junk food and i may still fight ED thoughts from time to time, but i'm no longer on the brink of hospitalization, counting my bones, weighing and measuring myself 3x a day, taking photos and videos of my bones to document/celebrate another day of starvation and weight loss. i'm no longer sitting in front of the mirror idolizing my skin stretching over bone, idolizing how easily i bruised because it was a sign that i was starving myself enough. i'm no longer body checking myself 24/7. my nail beds aren't blue and cold from malnutrition. i'm no longer celebrating every time someone expresses concern for my weight and whether i've eaten that day or not. my hair isn't falling out anymore. my eyes no longer look dead. my skin isn't grey anymore. my heart isn't tachycardic anymore. my kidneys are functioning normally now. i'm not obsessively revolving my life around calories and going to the gym. i'll take emotional eating and occasional binging over all of that shit ANY fucking day. THAT is recovery for me, because it no longer means death and obsession. fuck off trying to speak to someone like that lol. and fuck your cookie cutter intro to psych 101 idea of recovery. this isn't an exam question in the first semester of your psych minor, this is actual life. now, while getting to the root of whatever issue(s) plagues you is a huge step in the right direction and opens the door to healing, it is NOT going to magically fix everything and make you normal. an addict is always an addict, even if they have recovered. and EDs are a hell of a lot like addiction: obsessive self destruction for a fleeting reward at the expense of your life. i know myself inside and out. i know why my eating habits are the way they are. i know why i went down the ED path. coping with, processing, and accepting my numerous "root causes" has helped me heal tremendously, but i will never be 100%. and that's okay. no one is ever going to be 100% after a fucked up childhood. that does NOT mean their recovery is null. do not ever fucking tell someone again that they "have not at all recovered." you find the root cause(s), you process, you heal, you learn a healthier way to think and live. recovery isn't linear and it isn't perfect and it's not some one size fits all process and there isn't a one size fits all outcome. thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[@rosiej.1473]

These two professionals together is amazing. A lot of what you related to food is also relatable to getting out of a cult or high control group. Trauma, being ostracized, fear, anxiety, shame and the list goes on. Since leaving the cult I was in I have seen a natural path, psychologist, PA psychiatrist, and hypnotherapist and listing to you all talk about all this things I finally after 18 months feel like, I am not crazy I knew the paths to take to get help and I did it. Still working through all the garbage but slowly getting there.

[@agreatday9566]

It's not often I see someone mention they were in a cult...so was I. Congratulations! Getting out is so hard, for all the reasons you listed and more. But we did it! And we'll continue to heal. Best of luck.

[@tysonreads]

I appreciate Dr. Ramani so much

[@denizbesikcioglu]

Kyle, you always know the key questions to ask.. Love and appreciate your show!

[@Lindableching]

I’ve hated my body for so many years and this reminded when it all started. My mother would call out every part of my body. At 11 I started developing breast and got my period she told everyone, in public at the table in restaurants. She made fun of me. She told me all the men would “want me” When I was 13 I was raped, I felt like I caused it because I was developed and looked like a woman. So I started eating and getting fat, until I was 16 then I starved myself. I also left home at 16 and hated food just as much as my body. When people started talking about how skinny I was, I felt embarrassed and trapped. This was so helpful to me. Seeing the pattern and understanding 11 year old Linda was mortified and didn’t have good decision making skills. I was angry at my mom for so many other things but this was something I could or thought I could control.

[@user-uq8tt1oj5h]

This is so sad to hear. I hope you're doing well now. I'm praying for your continuous healing.

[@maralizgonzalez84]

I am literally obsessed with this series. Amazing work. So informative. I would love if you guys did a series on play therapy. I have noticed you guys don’t have that much content when it comes to little kiddos.

[@yanitam1297]

Dr Ramani really has been so beneficial and helpful for me. I wish mental health therapy was valued more importantly within society no matter your situation in society. Awareness really does bring knowledge. If all people could access these types of therapy no matter their situation in society I really believe it could really help reshape so much truama around the world x

[@symphonysonic8643]

Love this! But I wish the title said it was about eating, not just self Sabotage in general.

[@vanlmr]

Having a doctor like either one of them would absolutely change my life for the better 😩

[@mikesgirl1988]

I never ever was a night eater, never had a problem with my weight, but now that I'm seriously stressed, yep getting up at night and eating, and gaining weight, it's cause I'm unhappy and bored

[@EmbodyYourDivinity]

I hear you, when I was might eating, it was because I was living incongruently and deeply out of alignment with myself. My path of freedom from night eating/overeating was a path of becoming congruent. Once I reconnected with myself, my body and my inner guidance in an aligned and authentic way, the food problem fell away.

[@beaniegirl55]

am i the only one who finds this conversation relaxing?

[@hannahlm6527]

My struggle with food started when I was very young, around 4 or 5 years old. My parents were always out so they had to get me a nanny. She just stuffs me with food like 2 or 3 packs of baby food in one sitting. After a few weeks, my parents noticed that I was gaining weight fast and that my food supply kept running out. They eventually found out and fired her. Since then I couldn't stop eating big meals. At around 10 years old, my mom would tell me to eat less and I remember being mad and offended everytime she did. I continued doing it until I was 18 when I realized that it wasn't normal. It took so much in me to try and change how I eat to the point that it frustrated me. It wasn't until college when I had to move out that I was able to see some progress. I think it was because of my environment. Now that I'm back home because of the pandemic, the habits are coming back. It takes a lot of willpower to stop myself from going back to old habits. But what keeps me going forward is the happiness and confidence I felt when I was getting better.

[@nowandaround312]

Your parents didn't control your portion sizes when you were 10? That's neglect in my opinion. Of course a 10-year-old isn't able to make healthy food choices for themselves. Parents are supposed to control what they eat as much as possible. Stop them from putting more food on their plate and if they're still hungry they can have another serving of vegetables. Don't make it the kid's responsibility by _suggesting_ they eat less.

[@EmbodyYourDivinity]

Sorry you've had to deal with that. Sounds like you are finding your way and getting better.

[@then35t18]

Pretty sure this outright explains obesity in the US. I had a theory that excess body fat is really just stored, unprocessed, or repressed emotional trauma.

[@jrg305]

Yes. I'm a dietitian who works in obesity and weight management. It's a lot of untreated mental health issues. I feel like both of these professionals could do a much better job than what dietitians are trying to do. We do better for the science and specifics of what to eat. but unless we've worked in the field for many years and maybe gone to therapy ourselves, entry level dietitians lack counseling experience. I think we had like two or three classes on it Max but not very much practical experience with emotional eating prior to sitting for license.

[@trytoo5167]

hypothesis not theory

[@wolfcub824]

@@jrg305 I went to a dietitian when I was a kid, they never told me that the reason I might be overeating bread and over drinking milk was that in some people's bodies it creates a mild Opioid reaction. I wish they had said something about that. I also had some major mental health issues, so it was a form of "self medicating". Too bad I learned this through my own studying this year in my mid 30s and morbidly obese II. I'm now changing my life to try and get healthy. A positive side of covid-19 was having time to focus on myself and improve my health. 😁

[@jrg305]

@@wolfcub824 sorry to hear. It's impossible for practitioners to do well on all clients everyday. Sometimes we miss stuff:/

[@wolfcub824]

@@jrg305 I don't blame my dietitian I doubt she thought of it... Maybe the information wasn't available at the time... I just wanted to tell my story to spread the information out there. Maybe some day you will have a patient that has that and I would like to hope that if you didn't already know about the condition that maybe I brought light to it. Although I would imagine that dietitians and mental health professionals work more hand in hand nowadays. Since often over eating is comfort eating. I just have dealt with this for so long, and only had a possible hint from one of my old doctors about the milk... So I don't know how well known this condition is. 😶

[@cdow9032]

Wow! This is answering so may questions I've been asking myself about hiw and why I set limits for myself, and feel I am not worthy of beibg what I know I am capable of. Some employers also contribute to this ie: " that position is filled, but we have this" and I'm tempted to take those bread crumbs out of fear, but no more. Thanks for this enlightenment!

[@zakiyanowicki5044]

I thought I might add that, if you are struggling with weight loss, your body has been conditioned to crave greasy or unhealthy foods. Or if you eat healthy but often overeat, it could be that you are substituting food for a certain stimulation. It is like what Dr Romani said about FLAB. You could be needing connection, quality time, emotional understanding etc Eating food gives that serotonin fix. Overeating then becomes an addiction, or a substitute. I like to build my stamina by creating a excercise regime that works for me. Start slowly but honour consistentcy, and don't beat yourself up. Work on burning more calories that you consume and 15 minutes of heart beat activity 3 times a week, with a good sweat in each session. Eating 1 hour after your workout to feed your muscles and build strength for your next workout.

[@wolfcub824]

Gluten and Dairy can have mild Opioid Responses in some people's bodies. Apparently I have a double whammy, getting that with both. I have been monitoring my milk intake, and gotten rid of highly glutenous foods. It has helped me a lot! I have no stop button when it comes to breads and pasta. So it's much easier to eat rice or rice noodles or corn tortillas in a healthy manner. Milk I tried to take out of my diet, but I got so depressed and had other issues that I realized I needed it in my food intake... So I found out what was the healthy amount to drink, and kept it at a limited amount. Now I drink about half of what I used to. I also decided that I wouldn't compromise on my food. I stopped buying extremely processed foods. Simple ingredients actually taste better and don't give an addictive response. Simple ingredients can help with avoiding sodium and sugar.

[@brendamoon2660]

I've never heard this before but I feel a bit intoxicated if I eat dairy.

[@calnewport1227]

Thank you all of you

[@ajsam4881]

Not me watching this late at night and binge eating LOL.......

[@danthadon87]

If I see Dr. Ramani it's getting an instant like.

[@kazetasj]

Every time you guys upload something I RUSH to watch it. Amazing content as always. I learned so much!

[@saardfetner8620]

The Indian doctor looks overweight herself. May be she needs therapist too. Read the Holy Bible and pray. It is lots cheaper than paying fee listening to advice.

[@pooie0116]

I grew up in a very dysfunctional family of five and mealtime was always a huge competition. If anyone got a bigger or better serving of food, there was always a huge argument or whining or accusations of favoritism, etc. Dessert was an especially contentious event because most of the time it wasn't easily divisible by 5 (Ever try to cut a cake or pie into 5 or ten equal portions? It's really hard.) Pizzas were also a problem for the same reason. Somebody's always gonna get less (which I guess means they're less important or something). My sisters and I realized this dynamic all along, but all still struggle with portion control and weight issues (we're all in our 50's).

[@LB-fk7ul]

so thankful for these videos! im learning so much ! Thank you to everyone :D

[@jingjingtian]

The cheesesteak girl doesn't want to abandon or be abandoned by her family. Food and being obese is about being accepted and gets linked to survival. That's why when someone from a poor family graduates high school, their family system can turn against them and then the child who just graduated doesn't go to college b/c they feel abandoned.

[@Krzwl]

YES YES YES -- DETOX the Inauthenticity! DETOX the Mental Incongruency, even when I stood in silence! Come out of that incongruent environment consciously determined to detox and reclaim my authenticity: Self-Reinforcement!

[@EmbodyYourDivinity]

I'm with you! I'm all about authenticity and congruency too!

[@mariannehartigan]

I’ve spent an hour a day with Jesus, in front of the Blessed Sacrament, for months starting this past June, and it’s felt like hypnotherapy. I just felt whatever I was feeling, and it hurt, and so much pain and anger came out, and I had to trust that I was allowed to feel all these feelings, and it was like daily high-paid psychotherapy sessions, except they were free. :) It was so hard. Dealing with all these feelings, it was constant non-stop emotions coming out for about three months. I didn’t want to keep going but I didn’t want to stop either. And now I can talk to people. I don’t have anxiety in public. I direct my children so much more. I do so much more with them. And I’ve dropped 26 pounds, when I couldn’t lose any weight before. I’m hoping to lose another 20, and that seems very achievable. I was able to give up sweets which I’ve been addicted to since I was young. Most of all I just can handle things a lot better.

[@00Victoriah]

love this information

[@ray.deathray]

I don’t know how common of an experience this is, but I’m dismayed when I think of how often adults would casually make disparaging comments and jokes about my weight as a child. They wouldn’t make comments like that towards adults or older teenagers, because that would be rude and borderline cruel. But when it came to me, so many people were so nonchalant. They must have figured that, because I was just a young kid, it wouldn’t matter. In actuality, those may be the times when it matters most. Childhood is literally when you learn about how the world works, and when other people’s actions impact you the most. I learned that my body made me a joke, and that it was ok to be insulted. I was taught that I should listen to adults, so my only options were to agree and feel ashamed, or just laugh along. I don’t remember anyone ever defending me, but I do remember the insults I received from multiple people on multiple occasions. And if I’m remembering correctly, it was actually adults who did this way more often than other kids did. I’m in my 30s now and haven’t been overweight for half of my life, so those experiences don’t consciously haunt me anymore, but it’s baffling how so many people thought that was acceptable.

[@vksomji]

It's True, Even I experienced this, I haven't Craved or Transformed into a Hogger as such, but after Practicing Mindfulness through Self Hypnosis, I started Eating Better & Healthy Diet, which would avoid Nutritional Deficiencies.😊 Nutritional Deficiencies was/ is one of the Reason for my Mental Disorders.

[@clementekpo7606]

These are gold 👌🏼

[@wendymorgan4117]

I have had a VERY long term problem with food, but it is the opposite of the problem most people have. I am 60 years old and weigh just 38kg (sorry I live in Australia and have no idea what that converts to in pounds, but I think it's less than 84 pounds) I don't even think about eating most of the time and find it very strange when I eventually feel hungry. When I do feel hungry, I always think it's strange and wonder why and when I try to remember when I last ate something, I suddenly realise that it has been more than a week and sometimes even as long as 2 weeks since I last ate anything. When I get up in the morning, I will have a shower and then go about my day. Most of the time I am usually quite busy, but even if I am not busy and just spend the day watching KZbin videos, I still don't even think about eating. I always make sure that I have plenty of water, but that is all I ever bother with. I sometimes try to eat a little bit when I am out with friends, but most of the time I struggle to eat anything. Last year I passed out while walking my dog and some people said they saw my dog and wondered why she was just standing there and then they saw me lying on the footpath, so they stopped to see if I was ok and called an ambulance. It took quite a while before I was coherant enough to understand what had happened and by this time there was quite a crowd surrounding me. Once I regained concsiousness, most people left, but the couple who first saw me and called the ambulance stayed with me because I wanted to get up and go home, but they wouldn't let me because they wanted me to wait until the ambulance arrived. They were also quite concerned that they thought I was a very long distance away from my home, but that was just a normal daily walk for me and I didn't consider it to be far at all. Once the ambulance arrived, they were immediately concerned about my weight and my blood pressure was very low. They were also concerned about the distance I had walked which I found extremely strange because I was actually on my way back home and was about half way from where I had been, but I didn't tell them that, but I often walked much further and this was actually just a short walk as far as I was concerned. I don't do these walks for exercise or to lose weight. I don't eventhink about my weight. I do these walks because I enjoy taking my dog for a walk and she enjoys it too. The ambulance insisted on taking me to the hospital, so I called a friend to come and pick up my dog. When I arrived at the hospital they sent a letter to my regular GP telling him that he needs to refer me to the eating disorder clinic, which he did. Unfortunately when the eating disorder clinic contacted me, they wanted to know how many times a day I purge and how often I take laxatives or diet pills and keep a count of how much I am eating, or do I weigh myself multiple times a day and if I look at myself in the mirror, do I think I look fat etc. but I don't do any of those things, so I was rejected from the eating disorder clinic because I am not intentionally losing weight and I don't think I am fat. I understand that only eating once a week or fortnight is not normal and I understand that it is having a significant affect on my health, but I don't know how to fix it and the fact that the eating disorder clinic rejected me, means that I have to find a way to do this on my own. I believe I do know what started this, but I am not going to talk about it on here except to say that my father used food as a punishment when I was a kid.

[@wendymorgan4117]

I do have an adult daughter and when she was little, I would feed her, but still didn't even think about feeding myself. I also have a large number of pets which I feed every day without even thinking about eating. I often have people asking me how it is possible to feed all my pets without even thinking about eating, but it is just a part of my daily routine of things that I do just the same as cleaning up their mess. I don't think about food when I'm cleaning up their mess and feeding them is just another thing that I have to do as part of having pets.

[@paradisecolors]

Another amazing educational video. This was very helpful. Thank you so much

[@delphinium5555]

Does Dr Ramani have any courses on binge eating/emotional eating disorders please?

[@ea7535]

You are doing God's work. Thank you for this insight, it's really appreciated. And this is the core of our profession, selflessly helping others feel better and live a fuller life. You make mefeel proud to be a part of it one day.

[@ea7535]

@InfoJunkie I meant that as a phrase, not as a literal statement. What they're doing is very meaningful and will benefit a lot of people who are going through tough times.

[@lauras.7179]

What if your weight is a protection against hurt-because you can trick yourself into believing that they’re just rejecting your weight, not the real you? Or maybe you hide behind it as an excuse to not try things, or put yourself out there, or take risks. You can imagine all the great things you’ll do when you’re skinny, how your life will change, how you finally be worthy of love…. But then you self sabotage because those things scare you, and you don’t want to face the reality that being skinny won’t solve all your problems-in fact it may cause more (like your family being threatened by your success, or losing relationships because you finally feel confident enough to stand up for yourself)…. It’s easier to just keep dreaming than it is to actually try and fail because if you fail then there’s nothing more to dream about.

[@virginiapursley7082]

Thank you sooo much for this!!!

[@MedCircle]

Thank you for supporting mental health education!

[@riod7559]

This helped thanks

[@sugeyneri3990]

What if food doesn't interest you at all and you only eat to survive? Feels like a 3D chore.

[@kateapple1]

Wow I feel that

[@jenniferheifner2628]

Me, too. If I could take all my nutrition in a tablet it would be great, lol!!!!!

[@amichakraborty2770]

I wish i could be like that.. i think of food all the time.. and it gets frustrating...

[@a.k.4085]

This what I need. And the timing is awesome. 😊👍👍

[@jenniferheifner2628]

This is soooooo amazingly helpful!!!! Options that I never even considered as reasons. Thank you Medcircle ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@naomiolohoy1461]

This is very helpful. Thank you so much. 🙏💖

[@ramsonutube]

FLABS - Frustration, loneliness, anger/anxiety, boredom, stress. Any of these negative emotions precede bad habits or self sabotaging behaviours. All bad/unhealthy behaviour is a means to escape theses negative emotion. As we are typically unaware of these emotions arising, we tend to unconciously repeating these behaviours, though we know theses are hurting our health. Procrastination, binge eating, emotional shopping, alcoholism.....all most all theses problems have the same root - escaping the negative emotions. Solution - Developing awareness through meditation and being aware of the emotions as they arise and surf theses emotions without further acting.

[@ameeshi2449]

I love this series!!!

[@addapavan5200]

Very helpful video. Thank you.

[@lauragadille3384]

I have a binge eating disorder. I've tried everything to stop but I can't stop

[@KeiraMitchell1]

[@lauragadille3384]

@@KeiraMitchell1 how did you do it

[@martinaisabellopez2945]

Get medical help💛

[@lauragadille3384]

@@mikaking3150 Ty so much. I am in counsling.

[@EmbodyYourDivinity]

I used to struggle with binge eating too. Sending you so much love and also here to say that freedom is totally possible! I have been free from my eating disorder/food addiction for over a decade. This is so possible for you too ❤

[@ashalillyland]

I am really enjoying this series I have been taking notes an trying to see how I could apply some of these exercises to my life and rework my thinking a bit my only thing is that I wish they talked about the other side of the spectrum of weight the ppl who aren't bigger the ppl with problems eating food the extreme pickiness or wanting to eat bigger portions but physically can't this is still helpful but I can't help but want to see some examples of the other side of it for more understanding

[@ashutoshdwivedi9502]

I can relate this with my habit of binge watching KZbin, coz I would hardly watch something knowledgeable and productive, rather than watching random gaming videos and comedy, because binge watching is not for a quick and satiable relaxation, it is just a shameful way of escaping.

[@angierox6964]

7:53 nice. Important call

[@shrinkelizabeth]

I thought I overcame my binge eating problem, but then I entered into a really stressful period of life and gained all of the weight back and never figured out how to get control again. I am reminded constantly...every time I put on my clothes, see a picture of myself, walk past a mirror, etc. It feels hopeless and I'd rather die than continue struggling with this.

[@marinabarbosa5462]

I just read this now, hope you’re well!

[@annahunter2192]

Allen Carr - Easy way for women to lose weight and Allen Carr - Good sugar bad sugar. Changes the way you think about food. I read them back to back and lost 15 kgs in a matter of months - didn't put on any weight in the Lockdown either. Was 86kgs.

[@EmbodyYourDivinity]

So sorry you're struggling. I used to be out of control with food too. I know that feeling of being disgusted every time I put on clothes...I want to say that there IS hope. I got free from my binge eating disorder/food addiction over a decade ago and you can get free too. ❤

[@libelulaojo]

Dr. Ramani L

[@cdow9032]

Omg! The reframing story!! Dang so many ah ha's in here for me. Thank you for this video!

[@MemoriesInMonochrome]

It all starts with Childhood

[@TacticalDraws]

This is very focused on binge eating specifically, is there a better resource for other versions of self-sabotage?

[@-3lory]

medication and health conditions can also put on weight...example thyroid conditions

[@davidk.7264]

thanks

[@pollyanna8801]

I understand what you're conveying, but at the end of the day, if the micronutrients in the foods are not healthy for the body, how can one ever eat freely and not feel ashamed when we are to care for our bodies which means not eating that unhealthy food. Shame will aways exist when there is a truth one cannot deny.

[@ramyamaddali703]

Can someone tell me what Grace's hair colour is called? It has this exquisite greenish hue to it.

[@v.v5834]

Is there any way to get in contact with Dr. Grace Smith or Dr. Judy Ho or any professional for an online session where our real life issues can be be taken into consideration as per our life experiences. Or our queries about life experiences. Because sometimes we feel that we have accepted and overcome our all worst situations but our symptoms(pointed in your videos)/cases/life choices/mind doesn't say that we have overcomed and accepted. And in that case, we have nothing more, what we can do about it. So if there is any way(messages, chats, online, telephonic, video or by any means) where I can connect with your team. Then please help me out.

[@saneasm]

For a channel talking about mental health and topics of the such they seem to not get to the point fast enough which creates a lot of anxiety for people like me. The irony is bitter, sweet.

[@louisegarner8888]

Eating emotions ...

[@nataliewerner8913]

Great

[@lobotzindiegoantesnesslope6004]

sighs* all my swine life

[@katiewalters9186]

🤣

[@christinalto]

Does Grace Smith have consent to disclose the details of her client/classmate? It's many personal details that could identify her. Please consider ethics, or disclose your consent procedures.

[@kahlodiego5299]

Firing my gaslighting therapist. That's what part of it looks like.

[@brunapereira2505]

They spoke about eating disorders but forgot to leave out all of the triggering information that spark anxiety, fear, rumination and negative action to the other eating disorders… careful what information you choose to share, BED isn’t the only eating disorder and the advice they gave negatively impacts restrictive eating disorders so severely.

[@julianamatildi]

Am I the only one here taking notes?

[@lauryncole1660]

No ma’am! I’m right here with you.

[@jillnelson8746]

Shame - Brene Brown “Men, Women & Worthiness” great 👍 I’m wondering if we accumulate fat in response to being bombarded with EMF electronic frequencies. If the body is protecting itself against radiation? Agitation?

[@rd9526]

🍫 chocolate

[@eagle7757]

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16 KJV, Jesus Christ is the only way.

[@jamesgeist9535]

It sounds like porn addiction.

[@buzcagpozvu3078]

The ludicrous close fourthly untidy because gray conspicuously list under a brainy bengal. gray greasy great, uneven quail

[@lukei6255]

Psychologists are funny people. Read a few books and try to fix people but not for free. My grandma had more wisdom than them.

[@HaleThePanda]

First

[@ryankelly8077]

Theres no such thing as the “subconscious”... Why not spread more accurate information by referencing it as what it is -> a neuro-pathophysiological effect & molecular biochemical chain of reactions that bring on causal behavior....

[@mikesgirl1988]

Ok, so yes some of us may understand what you are saying, but most of the general population, you say that, you might as well be speaking in a foreign language, and yes their is a subconscious, it's were people do things that have just become a habit, you do it without even thinking about it, and the term subconscious most likely refers to an action related to an unhealthy habit

[@ryankelly8077]

@@mikesgirl1988 - to comment on the last sentence you stated. That would be what is clinically referred to as a “maladaptive behavior”. There’s no scientific evidence thus far that proves there’s a subconscious. There is no radiology images that supports that a “subconscious”’ exists.

[@ryankelly8077]

@InfoJunkie - no, I’m sorry but I think you misinterpreted my point, or I did not explain my point well enough .... I think I have a respectable grasp on the effects of trauma.. I recently completed graduate work and titled my study “the longitudinal effects of childhood trauma; as related to later pathophysiological and psychopathological development”.. I will attach a copy of my independent below. It’s a lengthy read, but quite informative. wix.to/HkDNB1c?ref=2_m_cl

[@ryankelly8077]

@InfoJunkie - I just have to complete my clinical internship to earn my M.A. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling.. I am simultaneously taking the required prerequisite classes that are required to apply to U.S. medical school w/ the hopes of one day becoming a physician. N my apologies, I must’ve misinterpreted your notion that the subconscious acts as an abstract concept

[@ryankelly8077]

@InfoJunkie says the guy who thinks the subconscious is an actual relevant construct😹

[@boubou2413]

What if u are in a constant state of FLABS somehow and u don't even fully realise it.. so food is always on ur mind and always a problematic topic 🥲

[@Somebodysomewheresometime]

Flabs is brilliant!🙏